Left Behind
by Lifespassion
Summary: When the chandelier crashes down at the Malfoy mansion Dobby apparates without one member of the group: Hermione. Suddenly Draco finds himself doing things he never imagined just to try and keep her alive. "What if?" scenario SLOW-BURN DRAMIONE. Dark-edged love story. Rated M: Full trigger warning Within. (UNDER REViSION)
1. Prologue part 1: The Malfoy Manor

*****PLEASE*** take a quick moment to read through the trigger warnings and notes before you begin.** **Thanks so much and hope you enjoy.**

 **AUTHORS NOTE:** **If this is your first time welcome to this story. It was originally started in November of 2018. I am currently (November 2019) updating chapter by chapter with edits trying to clear up any typos and spelling errors as well as adding some clarity to certain scenes thanks to positive feedback and helpful criticism that have helped me grow as an author so much in this last year. I do enjoy reviews and have used them to try and improve. If you like a certain chapter I encourage you to let me know. I really appreciate the feedback. Please keep all reviews and comments respectful. If you are coming back for a re-read of this fiction you will notice a lot of changes to the earlier chapters as far as narrative form and spelling, however I have kept the plot and scenes the same trying to stay true to the spirit of my original version.- Sincerely LP**

 **THIS IS A VERY SLOW-BURN, ANGST-FILLED, NOVEL-LENGTH, FANFICTION.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING:** **This story is rated M. It is rated M because it contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. While some people find it cathartic to read and write about these subjects others can find it triggering. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone. Please heed the warning.**

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Prologue Part 1-The Malfoy Manor:

The Malfoy manor was cold. The fireplace doing nothing to warm Draco Malfoy's bones as he sat in the drawing room with his ankle crossed over atop his knee. His grey slacks crinkled at his bent knees in the same way that his brow was crinkling at the material before him. Draco was reading a copy of an extremely old, extremely dull, book on potions and getting nowhere. The silken strands of his hair fell forward again tickling his lashes and he shoved them back behind his ear as he tried for the third time to make his way though the same same paragraph on newt's eyes and their various uses.

"This is useless," he muttered realizing he was just re-reading the same words over and over without absorbing them. He let out an exhausted sigh and rubbed his own tiredly. Yes he loved potions, yes he wanted to be reading about them, it was simply that he couldn't focus. Draco set the book aside and took a deep breath closing his eyes.

He was restless and he wanted to be elsewhere.

This house hardly felt like a home anymore.

The manor had never been a warm and comforting place for Draco though his mother did everything in her power to make it so, there was only so much that freshly baked cookies and treats could do to dispel the gloom from a place haunted with blood and death. Draco shuddered and stood walking over to the fire and warming his hands. He flexed and fisted his fingers, opening and closing, opening and closing. He let out a disgruntled sound and threw himself back into the reading chair picking up the giant tome and setting it back on his lap.

He was craving something, anything, to distract him from the chaos that was going on in his house and life and at the moment this seemed like the best solution. At least mind-numbing ancient potions texts didn't remind him of his actual life...

They reminded him of Hogwarts.

A dull ache started in Draco's chest. Even though he didn't want to fully admit it the truth was he missed Hogwarts and yearned for the comforting glow of the Slytherin dungeons.

 _Trust you to associate comfort with a dungeon Draco_ , he mocked himself darkly.

At least that dungeon didn't make him feel trapped.

This house did.

Because of HIM.

Voldemort, their 'Esteemed' house guest. His father, boasted about how the Dark Lord was living with them, while at the same time cowering from their 'guest'.

Draco's mind went back to the dinner party that Voldemort had hosted and how his teacher... Ms. Charity Burbage had encouraged the mingling between Muggles and pure blooded witches and wizards had become Nagini's dinner.

Draco shuddered.

 _How could anyone live like this?_

Why did his parents consider a world where you can feed someone who disagrees with you to a snake preferable to how it was when Dumbledore...

Draco's thoughts stopped cold and he felt queasy.

Dumbledore.

The man who he had be raised to hate, who is father hated, who the dark Lord had tasked him to kill.

Dumbledore who had stood there in the tower looking at him with such a calm acceptance.

Why hadn't he fought?! Draco felt a stinging in his eyes and pushed it away slamming the book closed.

 _He didn't fight because he was weak and old,_ a part of his mind said snidely.

 _And what does that make you?_ the other part asked back. _The young man who attacked an tired old man who stood there helplessly..._

Draco shook his head, Dumbledore had never been helpless.

 _Then why not fight?_

Draco opened the book again and found his mind wandering to Hogwarts once more. He missed his friends, Blaise, his teammates, even Crabbe and Goyle. He missed the girls who fawned over him with hopeful eyes and gentle bodies. It felt like it had been ages since he had just gotten lost inside a beautiful witch and let the rest of the world fall away. He could certainly use that now. Someone sweet, gentle. True that wasn't usually his type-he liked feisty and strong, but with everything going on he just wanted some peace.

Peace like he sometimes felt at Hogwarts. Hogwarts stone walls felt warm, safe even. The stone of his family's mansion felt cold like a gilded cage.

Every day he was away from the school meant his grades should drop...they wouldn't though-not with Snape as headmaster. Draco was officially 'Excused' from class and exempt from being docked marks in his absence. It was unfair, but not nearly as unfair as the fact that he had left at the top of every one of his classes. He had finally done it, finally climbed to the very top on his own, by his own power and merit and yet it mean nothing.

It meant nothing because he hadn't beat HER: Hermione Granger.

There was no satisfaction in being the best when his only competition had dropped out.

Harry Potter might be the thorn in his side and the bane of his existence but Granger was a challenge. She was the only student in school who he had to compete with in the classroom and time and time again he came in second to her, except for in potions and Draco couldn't help but wonder if that was because he was genuinely better than her, or if it was Snape and his favoritism at work.

When he had first met her he had hated her for what she was: a muggle born witch. He had been taught that people like her were worthless, useless abominations. When she opened her mouth all that had come out was a haughty little know-it-all bratty attitude that made him want to puke. How dare she act so high and mighty when she was so obviously beneath him...and then she had beat him in class.

Lucius Malfoy hadn't taken the news of his son coming in second to a 'Mudblood' well. He had threatened teachers and come home and reminded Draco with the back of his hand that he was never to let it happen again.

But it did happen again, and again, and again; and the back of Lucius hand became the lash of his belt, and the last of his belt became the thud of his cane across Draco's back.

No one was to know, not now, not ever on pain of the loss of his inheritance.

He was to tell no one...not even his own mother because god knows Narcissa Malfoy would not have stood for her baby being hurt.

 _"If you tell her you'll just prove to me how weak and pathetic you truly are,"_ Lucius words echoed fresh in Draco's memories.

No, he never told his mother; he wanted her love, not her pity.

He had every reason to hate Hermione Granger, and yet as he thought of her he couldn't help wondering where she was and if she was safe.

Where was she now?

 _Probably off gallivanting around with Potter and the Weasel trying to save the world,_ He thought grudgingly. He was glad she wasn't at school, not because he didn't want her there. He would never admit our loud that he missed the challenge and the feisty edge that made her so much more interesting than the rest of his classmates. He was glad she wasn't there now because the school wasn't a safe place for people like her anymore. Still, he missed the challenge. It was...boring without a challenge and she was the only one who really challenged him.

It was strange how it made him feel...not upset... believing she was off somewhere in a safe house, cozy and reading some old dusty tome like him. Maybe she was reading at this very moment curled up next to a warmer fire in a house much more comforting than his own. Likely with the Weasel. Draco sneered, the pleasant image of her ruined by the thought of the dumb git of a redhead who seemed to hold her fancy.

 _What does she see in him?_ There was no way he had half the brain she deserves in a partner. She deserves someone who was a challenge to her, who complimented her...He smiled at the thought then scowled at himself for thinking it in the first place. Draco shorted. Why on earth was he thinking about her?

 _Because she reminds you of a time when your life was more simple and all you had to worry about was beating her in class and avoiding your fathers wrath,_ his mind answered back.

The sound of voices coming form down the hall had Draco looking up from the potions book.

"My son, Draco, is home for his Easter holidays. If that is Harry Potter he will know." The words echoed off the walls. Draco shuddered, his fingers tightening against the cover of his book.

 _Not today, I don't want to deal with them today,_ he thought squeezing his eyes tight and silently willing them to all just leave and leave him alone.

What had she said about Potter thought?

"What is this?" his father drawled and stepped into the room. Both parties converged from opposite entrances making Draco feel as if he was being ambushed.

His eyes drifted to the group that his mother had led here.

 _No_ , Draco reeled at the sight of the group. He closed the book gripping it so tightly his knuckles turned white.

No, he repeated silently in his head.

Snatchers had caught the golden trio.

The Weasley boy, was half hunched over and looked bloody, and bloody awful. The pig headed weasel had clearly thought it was a good idea to fight with his captors. Draco would almost have smiled at it if he didn't look so genuinely hurt.

He didn't want to look further because he knew the person next to him was surely Granger. His eyes shifted and he saw that she looked scared and defiant at the same time. Like a captured lioness in true annoying Gryffindor spirit. She was struggling against Greyback's grip. Her little sweater rode up exposing a strip of smooth skin across her stomach. Draco couldn't help looking. His eyes flickered away quickly and he was that the werewolf was leering at Granger and the exposed flesh licking his lips like Granger was some kind of a meal.

Draco felt the strong and sudden urge to punch Greyback in the face, with his fist and then hex him with a wand. He batted the thought down fiercely. It didn't matter that he didn't like the way the older man was looking at Hermione he was powerless to do anything about it. Still, it made his skin crawl.

Only moments ago he had been picturing her safe and sound...

 _You should know better than to hope by now,_ he chastised himself.

Draco realized he was staring. Granger's sharp eyes met his and locked with him.

He couldn't handle that look. He didn't want to bear the weight of the anger and the pleading he saw there. Feeling nauseous again he he looked away from here and to the final member of the group.

It was Harry Potter to be sure. There was something wrong with his face, but who else could the one in front be other than the third member of the golden trio?

"They say they've got Potter," his mother announced with her usual regal authority and turned to him. "Draco come here."

Draco wanted to protest and turn heel and leave.

Unfortunately that wasn't an option.

Draco stood slowly, setting the book down on the table next to him as casually as he could manage. His mind protested with every step.

 _I don't want to be the Judas,_ the thought ran through his head. _I don't want to be the one who betrays the 'Chosen One'_

He tried to dismiss the thought. He didn't even like Potter.

No, he flat out Hated Harry Potter. Harry was the thorn in his side, the enemy...

That didn't change the fact that Draco did not want to be the wizard responsible for handing the wizarding worlds supposed savior over to the devil Voldemort.

Lucius saw handing over Potter as a chance at eternal glory. A few months ago Draco might have seen it that way to, before Voldemort had asked him to kill Dumbledore.

That was the night everything changed.

Draco was transported back immediately to the tower and the night mare memory he had almost every night. The memory of the old wizard standing so stoically and fearless... showing him kindness even as he held a wand like gun against the old man's head.

Draco shoved the memory aside violently. He felt his hand tremble.

 _Not now, you can't afford to think of it now._

He never want to think about that day, about how he had failed in two ways: Failed to live up to his family and the Dark Lord's expectations, and failed to save an old man, unarmed, and unprotected, from death.

Greyback pushed the disfigured boy forward. Draco walked over and stood at a distance in front of him.

He didn't want to get close. Even from where he stood he could see that yes, it was Harry.

 _Of course it is,_ he thought.

Potters face was pink, swollen and ugly, quite hideous to behold. It was obvious to Draco that Harry had been cursed.

The clothes were right, the glasses, and the company he was keeping certainly gave it away.

More than any of that Draco simply 'Knew' it was Potter. He had spent to many years next to Harry to not recognize him just because of some curse.

"Well boy?" rasped the werewolf.

 _Shut up you dumb dog,_ Draco answered in his head, saying nothing out loud.

He couldn't afford to antagonize the beast.

Draco swallowed, his throat feeling dry.

Potter wouldn't make eye contact with him, keeping his head low. Draco would have sneered if he wasn't so focused on remaining calm or at least, maintaining the illusion of calm...

Draco was anything but calm.

 _What the fuck am I supposed to do? You weren't supposed to get yourself caught you dumb twit,_ he growled inwardly at Potter.

Draco felt a fine sweat prick up on the back of his neck ad he started to feel claustrophobic in the giant room. There were too many people standing around looking at him, waiting for him to answer.

 _Why does everyone expect this of me_?

It was a question that he kept asking even though he already knew the answer: because of his parents, because of his blood. He was expected to uphold the family 'Values' and tow the family line.

The privilege he had enjoyed his whole life felt like a noose tightening around his neck more and more each day.

"Well Draco?" Lucius asked avidly. "Is it? Is it Harry Potter?"

Y _es father, the chosen one is kneeling right in front of you, and you can't even recognize him for yourself,_ Draco almost glared.

"I can't-I can't be sure." Draco answered aloud and looked away.

Why couldn't they just figure it out for themselves and leave him out of it?

Why did it have to fall to him?

"But look at him carefully. look! Come closer!" Draco felt his father's excitement and it made his stomach turn.

He sneered inwardly.

Why had he looked up to his father for so many years?

Why had be wanted to make him proud despite the cruelty, despite the berating him constantly for coming second to the 'Mudblood'?

Draco glanced over across the room at her: The Mudblood.

How was it that he hated the sound of that word only when used to describe her?

And when had that changed happened inside his head?

He remembered a time where that was what he called her...to her face...to hurt her.

She looked desperate, begging him with her eyes to protect them all with a simple lie.

She knew he knew; he could see it in those beautiful eyes

He hated her for all the times he had felt the sharp bite of his father's cane so the unfounded and very off-putting desire to play hero to her in that moment wreaked havoc inside him.

 _You're an idiot. You'll never be the hero. Even if you saved them they would all still hate you for what you've done to them in the past, especially her._

So what if he had tried to save her before when the death eaters had attacked the world cup? She didn't know that. She had no clue.

Her friends were too dense to pick up on his hint. If he had said it one more time even his own father would have picked up on what he was doing and there would have been hell to pay. As it was he still remembered the sharp slap of his fathers hand at the side of his head. Lucius who was always so careful about outward appearances had still stooped to striking his son in public. It coincided with things getting worse at home. It was almost like his own father couldn't quite keep the violence towards his son in check anymore.

Draco thought of that night, how he had worried that they would kill her. He didn't know why he had done it then. He had only know that he didn't want her dead. Not then, and not now.

He couldn't explain it.

He tried to write it off as just not wanting to lose the one person who had the guts to challenge him for real . She went toe to toe with him in class and she had gone toe to toe with him when she punched him square in the face third year.

 _Why don't you want her dead?_ the darker side asked at the memory of how much that punch had hurt both his pride and his nose. Crabbe and Goyle hadn't let it go until he threatened them into silence.

"Draco," His father leaned in, earnest. "If we are the ones who hand Potter over to the dark Lord, everything will be forgiv-"

"Now we won't be forgetting who actually caught him, I hope, Mr. Malfoy?" said Greyback Menacingly.

"Of course not, of course not!" Lucius moved closer and Draco took a step away, happy to distance himself from the mess.

"What did you do to him? How did he get into this state?" asked Lucius.

"That wasn't us."

 _If it wasn't them…_ Draco's thought trailed off and he looked back at Hermione.

 _She must have done it._

Hide his face to keep him safe while fleeing the enemy? Who was smart enough and quick enough to think of that? Granger was. He hadn't known she had it in him to hurt someone she cared about even if it was to save them. It made him feel a little proud of her.

 _Do you really think she hurt her friend?_ doubt niggled at him.

 _Yes,_ he answered back. It had to have been her because Weasel-the great clod- wouldn't think to disguise Harry's face if he had an hour let alone while trying to stay out of the grip of snatchers.

Draco glanced at Granger and knew she was the one responsible.

 _Probably hurt like a bitch_. Draco smiled to himself at that thought, and then shook his head.

 _You're an asshole you know that?_ he told himself.

"Looks more like a stinging Jinx to me." Lucius leaned in closer examining Harry's forehead. "There's something there… It could be the scar stretched tight…Draco, come here, look properly! What do you think?" Lucius grabbed the back of Draco's neck and dragged him in close to look. Draco didn't fight, he knew there was no point.

For the first time Harry looked up at Draco.

Draco's chest tightened.

If he hadn't been sure before he was certain now, beyond any trace of a doubt.

Those were Harry Potter's eyes staring back at him.

It didn't matter the scar on the forehead-distorted as it was-the truth of his identity was clear in the pair of eyes that looked back at him.

He couldn't read the expression in those eyes.

Harry didn't look hopeful that Draco would keep the secret, not like Granger had.

Harry was looking at Draco like he was trying to read Draco.

The look made him uncomfortable.

Harry had seen what had happened in the tower.

Draco swallowed, he had the urge to run.

Don't make me do this...

Draco choked out the words: "I don't know," and walked back towards the fireplace where his mother was standing.

 _I won't be responsible for the fall of the world._

 _I won't._

Narcissa tried to catch her son's gaze. He could feel how she wanted to help him. She was always so kind to him even if she was cold to others. He wanted to turn to her, to lean on her but he knew if he did that now she would see in his eyes that he did "Know" and that he was lying, so Draco refused to make eye contact.

Her desire to keep the family safe would overrule her desire to keep him out of this mess.

He didn't blame her.

He couldn't blame her.

He loved her and she loved him like he was the greatest son in the world despite all of his faults and shortcomings.

Lying was putting them all in danger.

If he lied flat-out and said it wasn't Potter his family could be marked for death as soon as the truth came out.

If he told the truth now it would bring whole of the wizarding world crashing down.

He could see the order of events unfolding in his head as clear as if they were happening for real and not just predictions.

Voldemort would be called.

Voldemort would come to the manor.

Voldemort would kill Harry Potter and every wizard after who got in his way.

He would also as kill every wizard who wasn't pure: He would Kill Hermione and probably make a show of it.

Then Voldemort would come out to the world and rein supreme.

He would create a new world-a dark world.

Lucius thought that new world would bring him fame and glory.

Draco knew it would only keep them teetering on the edge of the dark Lord's so-called "Good will" until someone did or said something he didn't like and made examples of them all.

No matter what happened Draco knew if Voldemort won he and his family would eventually lose.

He knew it down to his bones even if he was the only one who could see it.

Draco wanted to protect his mother; She had always protected and looked out for him.

He also wanted to protect Granger.

Stupid and irrational as it was, he wanted to protect her.

He also didn't want the future where Voldemort ruled the world and that meant that- for very personal and selfish reasons- he wanted to keep Harry safe too.

 _I can't believe I just thought that,_ Draco closed his eyes.

He knew he would choose family over all else; He had to, but he didn't want to have make the choice at all.

Narcissa turned to Lucius warning him that they had to be certain. Draco tried to tune them out.

He imagined he was somewhere else, somewhere safe, like the beach he loved so much, or Hogwarts.

He rested his head against his arm on the mantel.

"What about the Mudblood, then?" Greyback shoved Hermione forward and Draco's head shot up. The hairs on the back of his neck stood to attention.

 _You can't let him have her,_ he thought, _You know what he'll do._

Draco had heard the rumors of Greyback's depravity.

He could hate Granger and still not want her to go through that...and he didn't hate Granger. He certainly didn't feel any affection for her...he couldn't...but he respected her too much to hate her.

Draco watched in the mirror as Hermione struggled against the werewolf's rough hands.

He saw Greyback smile.

He felt his cold blood boil.

 _If you paw at her I'll kill you, you great mutt,_ thought Draco.

He wanted to whirl and shout at the wolf-man, instead he turned slowly to face them, careful to keep his movements unhurried.

He didn't know where the protective urge was coming from but it was almost out weighing his desire for self-preservation.

 _Its just because she's a woman in trouble and your mother taught you never to hit a woman or let her be hurt in front of you,_ he told himself.

His father had somewhat different ideas about women however, Narcissa was a strong enough that if Lucius had ever raised a hand to her he would have spent the rest of his life regretting it.

"Wait," said Narcissa sharply.

Draco looked over to his mother.

Was she going to rescue Granger from Greyback.

Draco frowned and then he saw the look on Narcissa's face. It was a loot of hope. Narcissa recognized Hermione.

 _No, don't mother,_ Draco silently pleaded with her.

If no one else could positively identify Potter then the golden trio would be afforded some extra time.

If there was anything he knew about the trio it was that they had a habit of making use of time to escape danger.

Narcissa ignored, or didn't see, Draco's expression, as she got caught up in the enthusiasm of the moment.

"Yes-Yes," said Narcissa. She pointed to Granger. "She was in madam Malkin's with Potter! I saw her picture in the prophet!" Narcissa almost smiled.

Draco could see the desperation in her face: The desire to keep him safe.

She felt she was doing what was right for him .

His mother always tried to do what was right for him, even if he didn't always like it.

"Look Draco isn't it the Granger girl?" His mother inclined her head in earnest, seeking confirmation of what was fast becoming blatantly obvious.

Draco looked to his mother, then his glance darted briefly to Granger.

He didn't linger, he couldn't linger because he didn't want to see her pleading with him.

All the eyes in the room were on him.

He felt his heart thud in his ears, his pulse pounding.

A headache started at his temples.

Predictions of the future began to line up in images in his head once more.

This time his demise was more immediate.

He couldn't lie and say no.

It was obvious couldn't stall anymore, if he did everyone would know he was lying.

They would label him a traitor.

He would be handed over to the dark lord.

The dark Lord would kill them all.

That was what would happen if he didn't give them up.

Powerless, he felt-once again-utterly powerless.

"I…" he looked at his mother "Maybe…"

Time slowed, the room held its breath.

He looked to Hermione.

 _Forgive me Granger._

His next word felt like a nail in his own coffin.

"Yeah."

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 **Thank you for reading. If this is your second time through I would really love to hear what you think of this new and updated version. The earlier update of this chapter was 2,821 words, this new edited version is 5,241. If its your first time I would still love to know what you think of this opening chapter.**

 **A NOTE ON CANNON:** **The cannon for this story is mostly books, while occasionally drawing from the films. You will note direct quotes for dialogue for both as well as the occasional mix of quotes and scenes from both. This story begins with full cannon and as it progresses we diverge from the original plot for Deathly Hallows. This is a "WHAT IF" fanfiction. Characters begin as they were written in the original and fantastic way that Rowling did them. As this story progresses people will change in ways that I feel are appropriate given the circumstances and ordeals that they face. That said I have endeavored to remain true to the spirit of each character. Also, it is Cannon that Lucius has stuck Draco on several occasions in public, I am making the personal decision to portray Lucius as someone who was abusive towards his son behind closed doors since it has been my personal experience and observation that people who care about appearances and are still openly violent with others tend to be worse when no one is watching. That is not always the case, but it has been something I have seen.**

 **If you or anyone you know is in an abusive situation know that you are not alone. Reach out, speak out. You matter.**


	2. Prologue Part 2: The Chandelier

**Thank you to the people who took the time to comment on the original posting of this chapter and everyone who has taken the time to review since. Shout out and thank you to** gpullen **for the first favorite ever on this fanfiction.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M. It is rated M because it contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. While some people find it cathartic to read and write about these subjects others can find it triggering. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone. Please heed the warning.****

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Prologue Part 2: The Chandelier

The doors to the Drawing room groaned open and Draco's aunt Bellatrix pushed through.

"What is this? What's happened Cissy?" Bellatrix asked using an iteration of his mother's name only she could get away with.

Bellatrix circled the captive group giving the distinct impression of a vulture circling prey. Her dark eyes examined Harry, Hermione and Ron with great interest and darkly gleaming fascination.

Bellatrix was his aunt.

She was his blood relative, who treated him like a doting aunt would. Draco might have had some affection for the woman if he had grown up with her in his life more, but she had spent most of his formative years locked behind the walls of Azkaban prison. She was crazy. It wasn't that he believed the rumors that others had spread about her, it was the fact that he had seen her in action first hand. When she lost what little control she had and went wild it scared the shit out him. She was too wild to be predictable and to vicious to be tamed.

Not a day went by in her presence when Draco wasn't immeasurably grateful to be on her good side-if you could call it that.

Her escape from Azkaban had marked another turning point in Draco's life; the one where everything became so much more real, and dark.

"But surely," Bellatrix said quietly, "this is the Mudblood girl?"

Draco felt his hackles rise hearing the distasteful way she said the slur.

"This is Granger," said Bellatrix looking back at him.

Draco didn't have time to react since his father jumped in.

"Yes, yes It's Granger!" cried Lucius. "And beside her, we think, Potter! Potter and his friends caught at last!" the joy was evident in his voice.

Draco wanted to sneer in disgust. Catching himself he ordered his face into a cool mask to hid his reaction to his father's glee.

 _How can you be so blind?_ he thought.

"Potter?" Shrieked Bellatrix. "Are you sure? Well, then, the dark Lord must be informed at once!" She exclaimed dramatically as Draco watched his aunt haul up her sleeve to access the dark mark she wore so proudly.

His father stepped forward grabbing her wrist and stopped her. Draco looked on shaking his head as the two argued about who would would be the one who would have the honor of summoning the dark Lord.

 _Worried who will get the glory, not worried about the cost,_ Draco judged them silently.

Calling the Dark Lord was like a game or Russian roulette. There was always a chance Voldemort would just kill you on the spot. Draco's hand went to his own arm and he covered the mark with his hand. He wanted it gone. He hated having that symbol on his arm.

 _There is no going back, you are marked for life,_ he thought darkly.

Draco dared another glance at Hermione. She was looking at Harry trying to make some sign to him and the Weasel. He didn't know what they were planning, but it was obvious that she was trying to figure out a way to get them out.

 _How many times have you been the one to save them from danger?_ he wondered.

Draco's eyes flickered upward to Greyback who was focused intently on the young witch he was holding before himself.

Draco watched as Greyback stroked a hand down Granger's arm.

She immediately wriggled against the restraints trying to escape the caress.

 _Don't touch her,_ he found himself thinking at the werewolf.

As if hearing his thoughts Greyback looked up and smiled at Draco through a toothy grin.

Draco's hand twitched and moved closer to his wand.

Bellatrix let out a loud shriek pulling Draco's attention from the group. Bellatrix screamed something about a sword and began casting 'Stupefy' across the room at multiple snatchers.

Draco's wand was in his hand a second later. He held it out in defense, ducking down at the sudden commotion.

Narcissa who had been a few feet away was suddenly directly beside him, her wand drawn and at the ready, her stance protective.

Despite the four to one odds, the snatchers were no match for his aunt. One by one they fell where they stood, all except Greyback who had been forced into a kneeling position in front of Bellatrix, his arms outstretched.

Draco felt a sense of smug satisfaction at the sudden turn of events and he allowed the barest twinge of a smile at the corner of his mouth.

Maybe his aunt would take care of Greyback for him and then he wouldn't have to worry about keeping the beast away from Granger.

 _You shouldn't be thinking about her, you should be thinking about yourself and keeping yourself and your mother safe,_ he scolded himself.

Bellatrix leaned down down towards Greyback.

"Where did you get this sword?" she whispered as she plucked the werewolf's wand from his hand.

"How dare you," he snarled.

 _Go ahead and push her_ , thought Draco. _I want to see what she does to you when you do,_ he smiled inside.

"Release me, woman!" Greyback demanded.

"Where did you find this sword? Snape sent it to my vault in Gringotts!"

"It was in their tent," Rasped Greyback. "Release me I say."

Much to Draco's disappointment Bellatrix lowered the sword and waved her wand. Greyback sprung to his feet moving quickly away from Bellatrix. Draco enjoyed seeing him cower almost as much as he enjoyed the fact that the beast was now a good distance away from Granger.

He was looking at her huddled close her her friends, trying to tend to the Weasel's face when Bellatrix ordered Draco to take the Deatheater's outside. and finish them off. He Barely registered her order, only half listening as his mother began to argue with Bellatrix about just who was in charge in the Malfoy manor.

"You can't order my son around."

"He want's to be helpful."

"Then ask, don't command him. This is my house."

Draco didn't want to hear it. He knew perfectly well that as much as his mother believed herself to be the one in charge, his aunt was a wild animal on a very long leash from a master who enjoyed watching the chaos she wrought even against her own sister.

Granger looked over at Draco and he felt his chest tighten. He couldn't read her now. Ron looked over at him and he saw pure hate and rage. Draco looked away and then, because he needed the distraction, he began to levitate the bodies one by one in order to remove them from the room. His actions seemed to diffuse the argument between his mother and his aunt and he felt a little of the tension in the room ease.

"Take these prisoners down to the cellar Greyback," his mother ordered, reasserting some of her control.

Draco's head snapped around.

No way was he okay with Greyback being the one handling the trio, he had seen enough to know Granger was on the older man's radar as more than just a paycheck.

Draco opened his mouth with the desire to protest burning on his lips.

No words came out.

He didn't have a single reason that anyone here would consider valid, to stop the.

Draco's mind raced as he searched desperately for some excuse...any excuse as to why Greyback should do away with the snatchers while Draco handled the trio.

 _Think Draco, come up with something._

Bellatrix voice cut off his thoughts.

"Wait," she held up a hand. "All except…except the Mudblood."

Draco's spine straightened muscles bunching in apprehension.

 _This won't be good._

Greyback gave a grunt of pleasure.

Draco's earlier desire to punch him resurfaced mixing with the growing ball of dread he felt in his stomach.

"No!" shouted Weasely. "You can have me, keep me!"

Bellatrix hit Weasley across the face.

The blow echoed around the room, stunning everyone into a second of silence.

For once Draco didn't like seeing the Weasel hit.

"If she dies under questioning, I'll take you next," said Bellatrix and then she sneered down her nose at Ron "Blood traitor is next to Mudblood in my book. Take them downstairs, Greyback and make sure they are secure, but do nothing more to them-yet"

Draco watched frozen as his aunt cut Hermione away from Weasely and Potter and dragged her by her hair into the middle of the room.

"Reckon she'll let me have a bit of the girl when she's finished with her?" Greyback crooned.

 _Like hell you will_ , Draco growled internally, grinding his teeth. He continued down the hallway without giving Greyback any real response. He took the bodies out to the courtyard where he let them all drop unceremoniously.

He wasn't sure if they were alive or dead, unconscious or comatose and he honestly didn't care. He had no intention of killing them. He wanted them all to just be…gone.

Gone from his home, gone from his life...and yet, he couldn't bring himself to kill them.

Draco tried to convince himself it wasn't a moral qualm. Tried to reason that it was just smart to let them live. After all, His aunt would need something to "play" with later.

It was better to have her occupied with these ones rather than-

A shrill scream reached his ears stopping his thoughts in their tracks.

Goosebumps broke out all across his skin.

He stood frozen for a moment physically unable to move.

 _She's torturing her..._

A second scream followed and a shudder passed through Draco.

He tried to tune it out. Tried to block it, like he had blocked out so much…but he couldn't tune out her cries, they were too sharp of a sound in his ears.

it was Granger in there being tortured by his aunt: Stubborn, righteous Granger.

How the hell was he supposed to feel about this?

Why did the sound of her screams make his skin crawl?

 _Its just the sound, that pitch would make anyone's skin crawl,_ he told himself.

In the distance Draco could hear Weasely calling out Hermione's name over and over.

He sounded like a wounded animal calling out; a desperate sound of agony.

Narcissa appeared in the doorway, shattering the glass cage in Draco's mind.

She looked so calm and serene. He wished he could feel something like that right now instead of feeling like he was on the edge of a cliff looking out over the edge.

"I was worried you were hurt," Narcissa said, her voice filled with concern.

"I'm fine mother," he managed, even though he was anything but fine. Draco took one look at his mothers face and he could tell she could sense his distress. He tried to slip on that cool mask that he had been working to perfect ever since the dark Lord had decided to take up residence in their house.

Narcissa walked towards him wordlessly. When she was only a few feet away she reached out and put her hand on his shoulder. She let her perfectly manicured hand rest there for a moment before she let it shift to his upper back directing him back inside.

Draco's limbs begged to protest, and yet he kept moving forward as if his body were working on auto pilot and he were merely sitting back and watching as the ground came closer and closer. He wanted to pull up, he wanted to pull away.

With each step that Draco took down the hall Granger's screams grew louder and louder.

"I'm going to ask you again! Where did you get the sword? _Where_?"

"We found it-we found it-PLEASE!" Hermione's screamed again.

A cold sweat broke out over Draco's skin and he shivered. His feet stopped of their own accord at the entrance to the drawing room. Every fiber of his being screamed against going in. If he walked in and saw what was going on that would make it real. It would mean that his aunt really was torturing his classmate; Torturing the person who he had, less than a half hour ago, been thinking of as worthy challenger.

 _She doesn't deserve to go through this,_ he found himself thinking.

 _No one one does,_ his mind answered back, _why should it matter that its HER?_

His mother's hand tugged on him, her grip firm and unyielding.

Was it that she wanted him to bear witness to his aunt's cruelty or was she worried what his absence from the room would signal?

 _Why does everything always have to be about keeping up appearances?_ He lamented.

Another scream cut through the air.

He couldn't handle it.

He needed a minute, just a minute to collect himself.

"I'll be in, in a moment," said Draco slipping away from his mothers grip.

He could hear Granger sobbing only a few yards from where he stood.

"I need to use the washroom first." He forced the cocky manner that was expected from him. He let the prejudiced he had been taught show in his voice so as to try and convince his own mother that he was unaffected by this.

 _But you are..._ the dark in his mind whispered.

He was supposed to believe and tow the family line and that his schoolmate deserved what she was getting because of her blood.

Draco could see his mothers eyes on him, analyzing him-looking past the facade. He needed to get away before she began to wonder if he cared about Granger.

 _I don't care about her,_ He told himself. _I just don't want to hear the screaming._

Another one of those screams echoed down the hall shrilly enough that even his mother flinched.

"Those Deatheaters were filthy," said Draco making excuses. "I need to wash my hands." It didn't matter that he hadn't used his hands to move a single one.

His mother's eyebrows knit together for a moment and she could see that she was questioning what the 'correct' course of action was: to push him or let him be.

Mercifully she opted for the latter.

"I'll see you in a moment," she said with a slight nod.

It was not a question, or a statement, it was an order and Draco heard it clearly.

His mother knew he was flustered by the current events and she was giving him a moment to compose himself. When he was finished pulling himself together he was clearly expected to join the family in the drawing room.

 _That's fine,_ he nodded at his mother and turned heel and began walking down the hallway.

"You are lying, filthy Mudblood, and I know it! You have been inside my vault at Gringotts! Tell the truth. Tell the truth!" His aunt's voice rang out behind him and Draco's shoulders curled up bracing for what was to come.

Another horrible scream and Draco practically bolted down the hall with the sound of Granger's scream chasing him.

The second he reached the bathroom he turned and slammed the door against the sound.

Whirling he caught sight of his own reflection in the mirror and smashed it, sending fissures across the surface. He looked at his face in the fractures and choked out a cough. He gulped for air, feeling as if he were unable to get any oxygen out of the great pulls he sucked into his lungs.

Draco braced his hands against the sink and tried to knew he was in danger of hyperventilating and passing out. He counted the space between each breath in his head. The muffled sounds of Granger's cries threw off his count and Draco cast a quick charm to block out the sound in the bathroom. The silence was an immediate relief which hung strangely heavy around him.

Draco took two deep, steadying breaths and dared a glance back up at his reflection. His skin was flushed while the area around his mouth was write with the grim set of his lips.

Draco pushed back from the sink,waved his wand, fixed the mirror, and then stared himself dead in the eyes.

"You can do this." He said, and then closed his eyes. "You need to keep it together."

 _Why?_ A mocking voice questioned in his head.

 _Because you have to so your family can be safe._

 _Your family is out there torturing an innocent young girl._

The silence of the room grew more dense and suffocating.

The walls began to press in on him and that urgency for air return with a vengeance.

 _No,_ he told himself, _I will not breakdown._

Draco shuddered pulling himself together. His back straightened as he braced for what was to come, and opened the door.

He walked down the hall with all the speed of a condemned man.

"What else did you take? What else? ANSWER ME!"

Draco stepped inside the drawing room, feeling oddly detached from his own limbs.

"CRUCIO!" his aunt yelled pointing her wand down at a helpless Hermione.

Draco watched as her body bowed against the pain and she screamed shaking violently with the force of the curse. Forcing himself to move Draco turned away and walked over to where his parents stood watching silently. He took his place beside them and looked forward across the room at the stone wall somewhere over his aunt's head.

The sound of Ron yelling for Hermione echoed in the background.

He wondered what it was like for the Weasely boy to be so close and yet so far from his friend, to be able to hear her cries and do nothing.

Then he looked at Hermione and wondered what it was like for her to hear her friend calling out for her.

 _Does it make her feel more helpless or is a comfort to know that she isn't alone?_ he wondered feeling light headed.

Bellatrix crouched down straddling Hermione and Draco's eyes were drawn to the movement.

He didn't want to look, he didn't want to watch, but not unlike someone seeing an accident as is happening, he could not look away.

His aunt took her knife and began carving into Granger's arm.

Granger screamed.

And screamed.

Bellatrix held Granger's head to the side as she continued to carve and Granger thrashed.

 _Stop, please-Merlin-make her stop,_ Draco silently begged and looked away.

When the screaming stopped Draco looked back to see his aunt stepping up and away from Granger. He could see the blood from the knife and the word carved into his classmates arm.

 _'Mudblood.'_

The slur stood red against Hermione's pale skin.

Draco felt his stomach drop to his toes.

Wrong.

This all felt wrong.

It didn't matter that she was indeed a mudblood...to carve the slur in her skin like that...to torture her...

A single tear escaped Draco's eye unbidden.

He couldn't help it any more than he could help his own heart beating.

Hermione looked up at him, her brown eyes red from crying, fresh tears spilling silently down her cheeks and onto the stone floor. This time he didn't look away, couldn't. He felt a pain and tightness in his chest the likes of which he had never known.

He couldn't breathe.

Draco wanted to wipe away the tear, but did not want to risk anyone else seeing the motions so he just stood there looking at Granger wondering if she could see his face clear enough through her own tears to see his.

"How did you get into my vault?" Bellatrix screamed and Draco couldn't help but wince at his deranged aunt's voice. "Did that dirty little goblin in the cellar help you?"

"We only met him tonight!" Hermione sobbed, breaking eye contact with Draco and turning to his aunt.

Draco believed her, he had seen the truth in her eyes before she looked away.

"We've never been inside your vault…" Granger swallowed. "It isn't the real sword! It's a copy, just a copy."

This time Draco could hear the lie in her voice.

 _Of course its the real one. Its not like the golden trio would be waltzing around with a fake,_ Draco rolled his eyes internally.

"A copy? Oh, a likely story," screeched Bellatrix. She sneered and Draco could see her warring with the desire to believe Granger's words. She wanted it to be a fake enough that she was letting that desire cloud her ability to see the truth. If it was a fake then nothing would impede them calling the dark lord. Bellatrix's first priority was to please her Lord.

"But we can find out easily," said Lucius putting his hand on Draco's shoulder. "Draco, fetch the goblin, he can tell us whether the sword is real or not!"

Draco wrenched his shoulder from under his father's grip.

 _Any fool can tell it's the real thing by virtue of the fact that the golden trio has it in their possession, you don't need a goblin to tell you that_. He sneered. _You all would rather believe the lie than hear the truth._

Draco stormed away, happy for an excuse to leave the scene and the image of Granger on the floor bleeding. He exited the drawing room and turned towards the cellar. The second he was out of view of his family he let out a shaky breath and leaned against the wall.

His stomach heaved and he bit back vomit.

He had watched.

He had just stood there and watched.

 _What else could you have done_? His inner voice demanded.

 _Something_ , he thought back, _anything._ He straightened. He had to appear as normal as possible to Potter and the Weasel.

Draco hurrying down the stairs to the cellar where the others were being kept.

"Stand back." Draco's voice cracked. "Line up against the back wall." Try as he might he couldn't keep the waiver from his voice and he hated himself for the weakness. "Don't try anything or I'll kill you." Draco threw the door open and saw that they had done as they were told.

 _They actually listened..._

Draco grabbed the goblin by the arm and backed out again quickly slamming the door behind him before they could change their minds about being cooperative.

He dragged the goblin up the stairs and back into the drawing room handing the tiny creature over to his aunt.

"Thank you Draco," she said primly then turned with a yell and cut the side of the Goblins face. She grabbed him by his shirt collar.

The suddenness of her violence had Draco stepping back quicker than he planned and he almost stumbled.

"I am going to ask you a question Goblin and you are going to tell me the truth. Do you understand?" said Bellatrix.

"Yes," answered the goblin lowly.

"Very good," Bellatrix handed him the sword. "Is this the sword of Godric Griffindor?

There was a loud crack from the cellar.

"What was that?" shouted Lucius. He turned to Narcissa "Did you hear that? What was that noise from the cellar?"

Draco stepped forward to go check, happy for any excuse to leave the room.

"Draco- no, call Wormtail! Make him go and check."

Draco rolled his eyes and slipped into the adjoining room.

 _I suppose its better this way, if Potter and the Weasel are up to something I don't want to walk into the middle of it,_ thought Draco darkly.

"Wormtail, go check the Cellar," he ordered quickly, and then returned to the drawing room.

The Goblin appeared to be examining the sword in earnest, his dark beady eyes taking in the gilded edges of the handle and the tapering of the blade.

Draco held his breath.

Did he want it to be a fake? The Dark Lord would be called immediately...so no...but if the Goblin said it was real then...

Draco's eyes flickered back to Hermione. What would his aunt do to Granger if the Goblin contradicted what she had said?

There was another noise from the cellar.

"What is it Wormtail?" Lucius called.

"Nothing! All fine," came the answer.

Draco frowned, something about the tone of voice didn't sound quite right.

"Well? Is it the true sword?" Demanded Bellatrix growing impatient.

"No," the goblin responded. "It is a fake."

Draco let out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding and then his stomach dropped with dread for what was to come.

"Are you sure?" panted Bellatrix. "Quite sure?"

"Yes," said the goblin.

Relief broke across her face.

Draco's eyes went to Granger. Her eyes were closed making her look so peaceful.

 _She probably passed out from exhaustion and the pain..._

Draco closed his eyes.

 _At least she's somewhere else in here head and doesn't have to see what comes next._

"Good," said Bellatrix, and with a casual flick of her wand she slashed another deep cut into the goblins face and he dropped with a yell at her feet. She kicked him aside. "And now," she said in a voice that burst with triumph. "We call the dark Lord" She pushed back her sleeve and touched her forefinger to the Dark Mark.

Draco trembled.

"And I think," said Bellatrix voice, "we can dispose of the Mudblood. Greyback, take her if you want."

 _No!_ The word screamed in Draco's head.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Ron's voice came from the top of the stairs echoing Draco's own sentiment. "Expelliarmus!" Weasely roared pointing a wand at Bellatrix.

His aunt's wand flew into the air and Harry caught it mid-air and cast a quick stupefy at Lucius who collapsed into the hearth.

Draco drew his wand and he and his mother began firing spells across the room. Narcissa stated close to her son countering every spell that came close to either of them with skilled wrist.

Greyback joined in quickly sending Harry diving for cover behind the nearest sofa.

"STOP OR SHE DIES!" Bellatrix voice rang out across the room and everyone halted in their tracks.

Draco hadn't seen his aunt pick Granger up from the ground; she was there unconscious in his aunts arms, a silver knife to throat.

"Drop your wands," Bellatrix whispered harshly. "Drop them or we will see exactly how filthy her blood is!"

Draco's grip on his wand tightened. He kept it pointed at the boys but his eyes were fixed on his aunt and Granger.

"I said drop them" she screeched and pushed beads of blood rose at the spot where the knife broke skin.

His aunt was going to kill Granger if they didn't obey.

Draco's heart beat ratcheted up inside his chest.

 _Just drop your stupid wands already!_ He mentally screamed at them. _Don't let your stupid, pig-headed, bravery kill her._

"Alright," Harry shouted and he dropped the wand on the floor at his feet. The Weasel followed suit.

Draco's shoulders relaxed slightly.

"Good," Bellatrix leered. "Draco, pick them up! The Dark Lord is coming, Harry Potter! Your death approaches!"

Draco darted towards the wands on the ground and picked them up hurriedly, handing Bellatrix back her wand before returning to stand by his mother.

"Now," said Bellatrix softly "Cissy I think we ought to tie these little heroes up again while Greyback takes care of Miss Mudblood." The protest in Draco's mind was like a marching band from hell demanding he do something stupid and foolish to keep Hermione out of Greyback's clutches. "I am sure the Dark Lord will not begrudge you the girl, Greyback, after what you have done tonight," he aunt said sweetly.

At the last word there was a peculiar grinding noise from above.

Draco looked upwards in time to see the crystal chandelier tremble; then, with a creak and an ominous jingling, it began to fall.

Bellatrix was directly beneath it, dropping Hermione, she threw herself aside with a scream.

Draco stood frozen-a deer in the headlights-as the Chandelier crashed to the floor in an explosion of crystal and chains. He watched it crash on top of Hermione and the goblin.

That was the last thing he saw before shards few towards him and he let out an agonizing cry as they sliced into him.

A large piece lodged its self in his leg, but the worst was his face.

He doubled over hands protecting and covering his face in an attempt to ease the pain and protect from further damage.

All the noise and commotion suddenly became secondary to the pain.

 _What the hell just happened?_

He blinked and the pain doubled in his right eye.

 _I'm blind, I'm going to be fucking blind._

He tried not to move his face for fear of making the damage worse.

Suddenly the wands in his hands were being wrestled away, he squinted through the red to see it was Harry.

Draco let them go, he couldn't be bothered to fight for them.

He buried his face back in his hands and heard Harry cast Stupify loudly.

Suddenly his mother's familiar arms were around him.

He couldn't remember a time in recent history when he had been more happy to smell the soft jasmine of her perfume and feel the strength of her arms.

"Draco, I'm here." She pulled him backwards dragging him to the outskirts of the room.

Then She shifted away and was clearly fighting.

 _No, don't go,_ he silently protested.

He wanted to open his eyes, wanted to see what was going on, but didn't dare, the pain was too much.

People were yelling. He heard the voice of his father's old house elf squeaking out and then all at once another loud crack signalling a disapparation.

A heavy silence followed.

 _What's going on? What happened?_ he thought. _Who left?_

"They got away…" his mother's voice trailed off in disbelief.

Draco couldn't help the astonishment he felt.

They had actually managed it. The golden trio had gotten away. If he wasn't in so much pain he might have actually had the wherewithal to be relieved at the turn of events.

"Oh no…" his father's voice dripped with fear."Gone…they're all gone."

"Not all of them," said Narcissa.

"The Mudblood! I'll kill her!" Bellatrix voice rang out.

"NO!" yelled Draco before he could even think.

A stunned silence was all that answered him for a moment.

"What did you say?" his aunt's voice challenged him, breaking that silence.

 _Think Draco, think of an excuse._

"She's worth more to us alive than dead." he managed, though every word made him want to scream and cry at the same time. Were those tears forming in his eyes from the pain or was it blood?

"He's right," his father agreed. "At least with her we have something."

"She's a Mudblood, she's worthless," said Bellatrix.

"Not to them she isn't" Draco answered, he needed to stop talking, ever word he said had the crystal pieces embedding themselves deeper into his flesh.

 _You can't stop now,_ he thought, _Granger's life depends on it._

 _Since when do you care if she lives or dies?_

Draco pushed away the argument in his head. He would have time later to asses what the hell he was doing and saying. If it got him in trouble later he could always claim he had been in shock from the pain.

"She is the perfect prisoner, the perfect bargaining…perfect."

 _Fuck this hurts so much._

"She's a Mudblood," He spat out blood from the cuts on his lips and cheek, half needing to so he could keep talking and half doing it for the effect. "But she's also perfect bait."

"I agree," Voldemort's voice rang out behind them.

* * *

 **That's all for this chapter. Thank you for reading. The original posting of this chapter was**  
 **3,723 and this updated and edited version is 5,648. It is to the loyal readers and people who were polite in their comments giving helpful creative criticism and feedback that I dedicate these hours and hours of work that I have put in on the overhaul of these first few chapters. You are appreciated. Thank you. If anyone is swinging around for their second read I would love to know what you think of these updates. Cheers.  
**


	3. Chapter 1: The Binding

**Thank you to** Cinnamon Silver Tiger and Raecarey, **the original reviews for this chapter when it first came out. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review since. I appreciate each and every one of you.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ****contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.  
****

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Chapter 1: The Binding

Draco stiffened at the sound of the Dark Lord's voice. Even though he could barely see he could feel the attention of the room shift away from him and to the commanding presence of the Dark Lord.

"What I don't agree with is why I was summoned when Harry Potter Is CLEARLY NOT HERE!" Voldemort yelled.

Draco winced and opened his one eye. For a moment he worried if he would be able to see anything out of it and then, slowly, the room came into focus. There was a red haze to the scene from the blood that had dripped into his eye. As he looked to the side his other eye shifted and he let out a cry of pain.

The whole room darkened filling with black clouds, rolling across the ceiling and crackling with energy.

Draco looked up to see Voldemort lash out. Blasts from his wand rang out across the room and Draco heard the shouts from everyone else. Everything was happening too fast for him to focus on the action he didn't want to risk trying to follow it and destroy the other eye before someone had a chance to pull the crystal out of his eye and cast several healing spells.

A solid blow hit Draco in the chest. It felt like he'd been hit with a battering ram and it sent him flying backwards.

His back slammed against the stone wall his head hitting with a resounding crack. For a moment Draco's axis of orientation tilted. The noise of the room seemed to fade out and he felt darkness creep into the edges of his mind.

 _Don't pass out,_ he told himself.

"Draco!" his mother's scream pulled him back away from the edge of unconsciousness he had been teetering on so precariously.

He turned towards her voice and heard her footsteps as she ran to him; heard them slip and a strangled sound.

Draco tried to open his eyes and the pain cut through the one, he moaned.

His arms felt heavy.

Too heavy, He could barely move.

"My Lord," Bellatrix voice came out reverent and pleading. "My Lord..."

Draco wished he could see what was going on.

"We only wish to serve you," said Bellatrix with a level of sincerity which could not be faked.

Draco took a few breaths and within a few seconds the strength returned to Draco's limbs as the threat of blacking out dissipated. Draco opened his left eye, which was mostly unscathed, cupping his hand over the other side of his face to prevent any extra movement. Every twitch of muscle caused the glass in his flesh to burrow deeper.

His aunt was kneeling, in front of Voldemort. She had a serene look on her face, like someone praying to a deity. Her reverence seemed to sooth the Dark Lord and he calmed down and caressed her skin like a lover.

Draco shuddered

"My faithful Bellatrix..." His hand went to her throat lifting her up off the ground by her neck-but with a gentleness that went against the inherent danger of the pose. "You summoned me for nothing." He tilted his head to the side. Bellatrix grasped his wrists, as if in prayer.

He was not strangling her, not really. There was no sound of choking and no kicking of her feet which dangled several inches off of the ground.

"I summoned you for Potter," she said more calm then Draco had heard her in a long while. "He was here w-"

"AND NOW HE IS NOT." the Dark Lord bellowed. Lightning cracked in the room shattering a statue next to Lucius who cowered back. Bellatrix waited one heartbeat, then two before speaking again.

"My Lord, Dobby the elf...the elf that Lucius freed..."

"I did not free him," Lucius protested. "Potter-"

"Silence!" Voldemort waved his free hand and Lucius' cane came transformed into some strange and terrifying blend of python and black cobra. It rose up growing in size and in an instant it had curled tightly around Lucius' body, holding him in place. Its glittering green eyes like a pair of twin emeralds focused solely on its captive as it let out a menacing hiss.

"My Lord," Bellatrix said quietly. She held up her wand to her own head slowly and pulled a thin blue line from it.

Draco wondered what on earth his aunt was doing. They did not have a pensive in the house and the Dark Lord was skilled in legilimency.

 _Why doesn't he just search our minds to see?_ wondered Draco.

When Draco looked at Voldemort's face he saw the strangest expression, he was looking at Bellatrix with such a strange combination of fury and...gratitude?

 _Even Voldemort doesn't want to dive into the madness there,_ thought Draco.

"Look my Lord; see your devoted servants fighting for you," his aunt said sweetly.

Voldemort set Bellatrix down gently and waved his wand. In an instant a smoky disk appeared in the air, much larger than the pensive Draco had seen in Dumbledore's office. Voldemort guided the wisp of a memory in through the smoke and it stretched out replaying the events of just a few short minutes ago replayed in front of his face. The memory ended with the loud crack of the Dissaparating elf. In replay Draco saw the knife Bellatrix had thrown follow in after the golden trio and their friends. It was too blurry for Draco to see for sure where that deadly blade had landed.

"You are avenged for their escape," said Bellatrix. "I am sure my blade was true. I am sure the elf lays dead this very second." she nodded growing a little more animated. "And if what my dear Nephew says is true we have the only Mudblood in the world worth keeping alive..." She cocked her head to the side. "At least for the moment."

The Dark Lord turned towards Draco, His dark robes liquid in the lamplight.

"Draco," he said with a rasp. "Come here my boy."

Draco struggled, pushing himself up off the ground.

"Draco," he heard his mother's gentle voice, half encouraging, half worried.

Pain screamed through each of the little cuts as he finally managed to stand. The first step nearly dropped him back to the ground as the crystal in his legs sliced into the meat of his thigh at the movement. Every step was agony and was emphasized with a pathetic limps as he tried to keep his weight off the injured limb. He hobbled towards the Dark Lord, one bloody and clenched by his side to cope with the pain, the other holding his leg so that he could walk at all.

Draco stopped and stood before Voldemort. Looking at the grey sickly skin Draco found himself barely resisting the urge to cower away from the eyes of pure evil which now focused solely on him.

 _Why did you speak up for her?_ He asked himself, a bone deep terror making him question his actions. _You're going to get yourself killed over a stupid mudbl...girl._

"You lost your wand. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk." Voldemort stretched out a hand and touched Draco's face.

Draco hissed in pain.

"But you were wounded trying to keep what was mine..." his voice was almost sympathetic, almost gentle.

Voldemort lifted his wand and Draco let out a yell of pain as the shards of Crystal flew out of his skin and shattered to dust against the wall across the room. He felt a fire burn through each cut and he dropped to his knees with the pain. It was as if each wound were being cauterized simultaneously, he writhed.

"Draco!" he heard his mother call his name.

"He will be fine," Voldemort snapped. "A little healing from yourself later will fix him up good as new."

Voldemort fisted a hand in Draco's hair making him stand again.

Draco felt the burning in his face intensify everywhere except the cut by his eye.

"I think I will leave this one," said the Dark Lord talking more to himself than anyone else. He stroked his cold fingers across the broken flesh of the wound by Draco's eye. Draco couldn't help but squirm against the pain it caused "You will let it heal, and scar on its own as a reminder of my desires failed...and my mercy."

"Thank you my Lord," said Narcissa from behind him.

Voldemort dropped Draco unceremoniously and Narcissa reached out catching him before he could hit the ground. Draco leaned against her for support. He was shivering from the shock to his system.

"You believe on your life Draco that this...Mudblood will bring Harry to us?" asked Voldemort walking towards Granger's unconscious form. He looked down in disgust.

"Yes," answered Draco lowly.

"Speak up boy!" Lighting cracked again shattering the edge of the mantel. Everyone in the room jumped.

"Yes," Draco said more firmly, shifting his weight. "There is nothing potter and Weasley won't do to get her back."

"I don't care about the Weasley boy, it's Potter that concerns me." The Dark Lord turned heel and waved his wand. The chair Draco had been reading in earlier slid loudly across the floor and Voldemort sat down slowly. Everyone waited unsure of what would happen next. Even Draco who had been mapping out possible outcomes in his head was at a loss for what would happen next.

 _If he spares her she'll be used as bait._

 _That doesn't matter, it gives her friends time to come and rescue her._

 _Since when do you care about Hermione Granger?_ his mind taunted.

 _I don't,_ he protested. _I only care about my family and the way this war turns out._

"Bring her to me," Voldemort said darkly, his words breaking Draco away from the argument inside his mind.

Draco swallowed convulsively.

 _What is he going to do to her?_ Draco worried.

 _Does it matter_? the darker side demanded.

"Do as he says Draco," Lucius ordered. The enchanted snake hissed at him and swayed. Lucius clamped his mouth shut and tried his best to remain still as the snake constricted around him.

Draco moved towards Granger who was lying, still unconscious, on the ground. He knelt beside her. She looked like a sleeping princess. There were half a dozen small cuts in her face and arms, but for the most part the crystal had shot outwards.

 _Yeah outwards and into me,_ thought Draco wincing as his frown pulled against the still open wound by his eye. Each of the smaller cuts itched and burned, but at least they were closed.

Draco moved to lift the chandelier; It hardly budged.

"I'll help you with that darling," said Bellatrix and with a wave of her wand and the uttering of _wingardium leviosa_ , the chandelier rose and drifted away.

Hermione stirred.

Draco knelt down and hauled her up as gently as he could without letting it appear as if he cared for her welfare.

"What happened?" she asked slowly coming to. She opened her eyes blinking. It only took her a second to asses her position.

Launching herself into action she rebelled against Draco's grasp elbowing him in the face the sharp point catching his lip splitting it open. The metallic taste of his own blood filled his mouth for the second time that day and Draco's temper rose.

"You bitch!" he yelled.

Hermione ran and Draco launched after her tackling her to the ground.

 _I fucking risk my life speaking up for you and you elbow me in the face?!_ he thought angrily. _  
_

 _She doesn't know what you did,_ the other side of his mind answered.

Draco was to pissed off to listen to the reasonable logical side of his mind for the moment.

Her soft body writhed beneath his own and he tried to ignore the sudden and unexpected awareness that came from having her beautiful body pinned beneath his. Her curls filled his face and he spoke in her ear so only she could hear. "Its me or Bellatrix," he said spouting the first thing he could think of to make her comply.

Hermione froze and Draco used the delay to stand and yank her to her feet twisting her arm behind her back and holding the other against her shoulder. He Marched her up to stand in front of the Dark Lord in his 'throne'

"You must be Granger..." Voldemort smiled a sharp wicked grin. "Draco here thinks you're important. He thinks it's worth putting up with the stretch of your filthy blood because you'll bring Harry Potter," he paused dramatically, "straight into my hands."

"I won't." Granger protested sticking her chin out defiantly.

"Then perhaps you are truly worthless as Bellatrix said in which case..." Voldemort raised his wand.

"She's a Gryffindor," Draco blurted. "She's trying to be brave. If you kill her she believes they'll be better off than if she lives."

 _You stupid, stupid girl, you're going to get yourself killed._

Granger wriggled against his grasp and Draco held firm. He was almost a head taller than her and a good deal stronger. The wriggling was not helping his concentration, not when she was so close. Her hair smelled amazing, something flowery but not overwhelming. It was a soft scent and matched her perfectly. He had never been close enough to her to notice that before.

 _What the fuck is wrong with you?_ he demanded of himself.

Voldemort laughed. The sound crawled over Draco's skin and he shuddered.

Hermione twisted her head to look up at him and Draco refused to give way and look down at her. If the Dark Lord thought for even a second that Draco was protecting Granger he would kill her right in front of him for spite.

 _Why are you protecting her?_

"You're sure Draco?" The dark Lord asked.

"Yes."

"Then you won't complain if I bind her to you."

"What?" Draco balked.

Hermione turned stiff as a board in his arms.

"You can't bind my son to a Mudblood," protested Lucius.

"I can do what I want Lucius!" Voldemort snapped. "Besides, when she has served her part in giving us Harry Potter she will have fulfilled all her possible uses. Death will break the bind, so you can relax. It is only temporary."

"No," Hermione protested and Draco was too much in shock to hold her when she ran from him this time. She slipped through his open fingers without resistance.

 _Bind her to me?_

Bellatrix cackled wildly and lashed out her wand turning into a whip which caught Hermione around the neck. Bellatrix yanked her backwards and Hermione slammed into the ground her hands clawing at the whip round her neck.

Draco stood silently, stiffly, watching. He had never heard of binding one person to another outside of the unbreakable vow, but he had no doubt that Voldemort knew spells he had never even heard of.

His aunt dragged a writhing Hermione across the floor kicking and screaming.

 _You're lucky that's the worst of it,_ thought Draco. _I don't know why you're complaining. You're not the one being bound to someone so beneath your station._

Draco shook his head as his mind tried to remind him that only a few hours ago he had been thinking about her as a worthy rival and now he was belittling her in his own mind once more. He looked at Granger, who was still fighting as if her very life depended on it.

 _Is it that bad?_ He wondered, _the thought of being bound to me? It could be anyone else, why does she have to act like she was being bonded to Voldemort himself._

Draco didn't have to fake the scowl of distaste.

He saw Voldemort catch the expression. A small smile of satisfaction crossed the Dark Lord's face.

 _He's doing this to fuck with me, as punishment,_ Draco realized. _He might not even care or think it necessary to use her as bait he might just be playing with us. Playing with me._

 _Fine_ , Thought Draco, _So be it. I won't give him the satisfaction of giving in and pleading for another option._

Draco straightened pushing his shoulders back.

"Let's get it over with," he scowled.

"My lord," Narcissa spoke. "May I ask what the bind entails?" His mother;s tone was respectful making it clear that she was trying to gauge what exactly was about to be done to her only son.

Draco was thankful for her question. He wanted to know what he was getting into.

And while his mother might have seemed cold in her tone, Draco knew... could sense, the protective fierceness beneath the surface. It was a comfort to know that she was there at his back looking out for him.

Voldemort smiled.

"I came up with the bind myself," he said and Draco felt a shiver run down his spine. "I modified it off an old love spell...I never did have a hand with those...but the idea was of some use." Voldemort looked knowingly at Bellatrix.

"He uses it on couples," said Bellatrix. "To keep them in line," she clapped her hands. "Its really brilliant."

"It connects one person to another," said Voldemort gesturing from Draco to Hermione. "With the bind if she escapes Draco will be able to lead us straight to her. It induces an awareness of the other. Like a tracker-the kind no potion or spell can cloak." he stood from the chair and grabbed a hold of Hermione by the arm she cried out in pain as his nails dug into the open flesh and writing Bellatrix had carved into her. "No matter where she goes, no matter where she runs or if she escapes...Draco will be able to find her." Voldemort smiled. "

"Is that all?" asked Narcissa.

Bellatrix shook her head and Draco felt a growing ball of dread in his stomach.

"The bind also allows the best emotions through. Pain, fear, danger..."

Draco blinked.

"I am told it can be rather uncomfortable," continued Voldemort. "But then I believe Draco Is willing to endure a little discomfort to prove his loyalty to me. Aren't you?"

"Yes," Draco managed to keep his voice even.

Draco could see what Voldemort had done in his mind's eye: The Dark Lord had bound couples together...couples who had one member who was more...of a follower than the other. He could pressure each side of the couple by harming the other, using the pain and fear and danger in order to motivate them to stay in line. And if one of the pair decided to leave, to run...then the other could be used...forced to track them down.

 _That's what he'll make you do to Granger if she manages to escape..._

"Grasp her hand," Voldemort ordered and Draco took hold of Granger's hand. It was soft and warm against his. He laced his fingers between hers. She tried to pull away and he tightened his grip regretting it when he saw her wince a little.

Her Brown eyes locked with his and his grip slackened.

"Please Draco, don't let them do this," her voice was quiet and tinged with desperation.

"Shut up Granger. You think I want to be bound to you?" Draco scoffed and saw the hurt his words caused.

Good. If Hermione believed him the rest would too.

Voldemort lifted his wand and Draco and Hermione's forearms slammed together yanking them well into each other's personal space.

Hermione shoved at his chest and Draco grabbed her free arm before she could execute one of her passionate right hooks. He yanked it down to the side and twisted it. She gasped and he tried to ignore it as he tried to ignore the warmth of her body so close to his own. He kept the small space between them to keep them from being flush against one another.

 _She doesn't want this..._

 _Neither do I.  
_

Draco looked down at Hermione. Her eyes had gone hard, filled with hate for him.

Voldemort whisked his wand around and around theirs clutched hands and Draco watched a sickly pink light come down from the tip of the Dark Lords wand and begin to lace around them in the air.

"Vinculum permanens" Voldemort cast and the light reacted snapping into their skin. They both inhaled fiercely against the warmth and pain. Draco felt the power of the spell shoot through his body and an acute sense of awareness of her rippled through him for a moment he felt the chaos of her emotions. The look on her face told him that she had felt the same. She looked confused for a moment and he watched her dismiss the notion that what she had felt was truly coming from him.

 _Of course she wouldn't be able to believe you were doing anything to help her,_ he chastised himself.

"It is done," said Voldemort stepping back. He clapped his hands ostentatiously, the sound echoing in the silence of the room.

Draco released Hermione hand as if burned. He didn't want to touch her.

Draco looked down at the thin lines on his arm: They were faint, so faint that if you didn't know they were there to look for them you wouldn't see them at all. When Draco Looked up he saw Granger examining her arm in much the same way.

She glared up at him.

Draco looked away.

Voldemort waved a hand and released Lucius from the snake spell and Lucius' cane fell with a clatter to the floor. Draco watched as his father stood shaking and tried to smooth out his long blond hair.

"Don't worry Draco," said Bellatrix coming over to him. "You don't care about her so it shouldn't feel too awful on your side."

Draco shrugged off his aunts touch and moved back over towards his mother. Narcissa came forward to meet him halfway and took her sons arm gently in her own, handling him like fine china. She looked closely and then seeming satisfied nodded.

"Would you care to stay for dinner my Lord?" asked Narcissa slipping back into the role of perfect hostess.

"Thank you Narcissa but I have other things I need to attend to."

Voldemort turned to Draco.

"Make sure she stays close until we need her, I am holding you responsible for her location. Beyond that.-do what you will. We only need to keep her alive otherwise, have your fun."

With that Voldemort dissaparated leaving Hermione in the middle of a group of wizards...safe from death but nothing else.

* * *

 **Authors note: "Vinculum permanens" -the spell that Voldemort casts- is Latin, it translates to "Permanent Bond". In this updated version of the chapter I tried to go into a little more detail and make a clearer description for the spell and what happened around the casting, as some of the original post's feedback included questions. Thank you for the positive feedback which has helped me to be a better writer. I hope things are more clear in this version. Thank you so much for reading, I'd love to know what you think.**


	4. Chapter 2: The Claim

**A big shout out and thank you to the original update reviewers** : Ambearlamb, EndlessReign, TamaeKurogane, Tetrona ,I favor red wine, Cinnamon Silver Tiger, Fireheart394, **and to everyone who has taken the time to review since. I appreciate each and every one of you.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ****contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 2: The Claim

A heartbeat passed in silence after the Dark lord disaparated.

 _What the hell do I do now?_ thought Draco as he watched Hermione glance around and room nervously.

She looked like a trapped doe unsure of which way to bolt. Her eyes were big and worried, and rightfully so.

 _You got yourself into quite the mess Malfoy, how exactly do you plan on getting yourself out of it?_ His inner critic asked.

Draco didn't have an answer.

 _First things fist,_ he thought to himself, _you need to get her away from everyone else. She's in a room full of her enemies and she had no idea that you are on her side._

 _I'm not on her side_ , another part of his mind argued back. That didn't change the fact that he wanted to get her away from everyone as fast as possible.

He was her only ally in a room full of enemies and she had no idea,

Draco's gaze was drawn to the corner as Greyback started to rouse from his place on the floor, his mind immediately played over what would come next. Greyback would still want Granger as his reward. Draco swallowed, he didn't know how he was going to handle that particular conversation. What he did know was that there was no way in hell he was going to just hand Granger over to Greyback.

 _Get her out of here,_ the voice inside his head ordered.

Draco reached out towards Hermione and she recoiled from his touch.

 _I'm trying to help you, please don't make this harder._ Draco pleaded with her silently.

If Hermione saw anything in his eyes she was choosing to ignore it.

Draco scowled.

 _Stubborn witch._

"Take her down to the dungeon," said Lucius trying to pull himself neatly together. He smoothed out his hair with a shaking hand. "Make sure she doesn't get out."

"Wait," said Greyback drawing everyone's attention. "Does no one remember she's supposed to be mine? My reward for catching Potter?"

 _I remember,_ thought Draco.

He smiled a wolfish grin at Hermione. "You're going to be worth it. I can smell that pretty little-"

Draco started speaking cutting off the vulgar end to Greyback's sentence.

"While you were passed out on the floor circumstances changed," his tone was the most posh and condescending and authoritative he could manage. All he wanted to do was rage at the werewolf and tell him that he would never touch Hermione while Draco was still around. Of course saying that would be as good as handing Granger over to them. If anyone in the room thought for one second that he was trying to protect her he would be labeled a traitor.

 _So why are you trying to protect her?_

"I don't see how they could have changed that much," Greyback brushed off his coat and stuck his chin forward "I want my fun."

"I don't see why that would be an issue," said Bellatrix with a quirk of her brow. "We only have to keep her alive."

"No," Granger shrunk back and towards the wall as Greyback stepped forward.

"Stop!" Yelled Draco, his calm breaking.

The room turned to him at his outburst.

"She's mine, my charge, at the dark Lords orders." The words rushed out making him sound like a spoiled child even to his own ears. He might as well have been whining 'its my toy you can't play with it'

Draco watched Granger size him up trying to figure out just what was going on with him. He could practically see the wheels turning as she assessed whether or not she could trust him or turn to him.

 _Don't give us both away by being so damn trusting. You can't always find good in people Granger, sometimes there is nothing good to find._

"Don't worry, there will still be time for leftovers," said Greyback licking his lunged forward trying to catch her. His claw tore her sweater in an angry rip.

Hermione tried to run from the room and Bellatrix lashed out with a spell sending Hermione crashing to the floor, there was a crunching and Draco winced at the sound.

Draco wracked his mind for an excuse.

"As if I want your dirty seconds," spat Draco, clinging on to the only thing that would make 'sense' to the room as an excuse for him not wanting Greyback to touch Granger.

"She's my reward," growled Greyback.

"Was your reward," corrected Draco with an air of authority. His confidence welled.

 _If I play my cards right I can get my way on this_ , thought Draco and his mind kicked into high gear. _Use the cunning Slytherin house is known for, for something good why don't you?_

He latched on to an idea and ran with it.

"She was your reward," repeated Draco. "Now she's mine," Draco held out his arm. "The dark Lord bound her to me himself. If that doesn't give me the right to claim her, then I would like to know what higher authority you answer to." The challenge was obvious. If Greyback claimed he deserved her still over Voldemort's will he put himself in danger of creating dissent in the ranks,,,something that the Dark Lord did not take kindly too.

 _I dare you to challenge me on it_ , thought Draco darkly. With his aunt in the room the news would go straight back to Voldemort. Bellatrix already considered Greyback less because of the fact that he was a werewolf. She wouldn't hesitate to turn him over. Still, Draco didn't want to push his luck too much so he tried to soften the blow to give the werewolf a chance to back out and save face.

"If you want your reward you can have the gold she is worth, I'll pay you the sum myself," Draco offered trying to sound magnanimous, then his voice turned harder. "But understand, she is mine."

"Draco, why spare the gold. She's a Mudblood?" Bellatrix came over to him stroking a hand across his shoulder. "Surely you can share...it's not like she's pure."

"Because I don't want his filthy paws on her," the words were out of Draco's mouth before he could stop them or think better.

 _That was the wrong thing to say._

"You're soft on her," Bellatrix accused stepping back with a gasp.

Lie, Draco's mind screamed.

 _Lie well, lie better. Lie and save her life._

"Like hell I am!" said Draco. "Give me a wand." The request rang through the room. "A wand, someone give me a wand," he demanded and held out his hand waiting.

Narcissa came forward and handed her wand to her son. Her expression was hard and unreadable.

Was his mother going to hate him for what he was about to do?

 _You don't have a choice and you can't afford to think like that_ , Draco told himself. He needed to convince his aunt, and everyone else in the room that he was not soft on Granger. He wasn't...he just didn't want her to die.

Draco turned to Hermione who was crawling on her belly away from the group. Draco saw the small trail of blood being left in her wake.

 _She's already hurt..._

Draco steeled himself.

"You think I'm soft on her?" Draco asked looking at Bellatrix. He smiled his most wicked grin.

 _You have to...you have to do this or they will never believe you,_ he told himself and turned his mother's wand on Hermione.

Her cry of pain sliced straight into his soul and he felt himself bleed inside.

"You think I have feeling for this filly little Mudblood?!" he shouted and cursed her again.

Granger began sobbing.

He hated the sound, hated that he was the cause.

"Draco please stop, don't do this," she pleaded holding her hands up half in surrender, half in instinctive defense.

 _I want to stop, I don't want to do this,_ he answered her silently.

"Look at her beg him," Bellatrix laughed and clapped gleefully.

"You think," Draco said as he struck out again with a slash, forcing himself to attack the person he was trying to protect; doing everything he could to block out the blackness of his own actions. "That I want to be bound to a filthy little bitch like her?"

 _Oh god, what am I doing?_ He raised his wand again.

"I don't." He finished darkly.

Draco lashed out and Granger went flying across the room. He saw her hit his reading chair and knock it over. She rolled across the floor and to the side, Her arms collapsed beneath her as she tried to raise herself up.

Draco turned to his aunt.

"Make no mistake dear aunt: I hate her, for what she is and for what she has been in my life. She is a thorn in my side. And now here she is," he gestured to her crumpled form. "I have her at my disposal, away from any 'Do-gooders eyes' and you think" he turned to Greyback, "I'm going to let anyone else have fun with my new toy?" His voice rose and he turned back to Hermione who was looking at him like he were truly a monster. "She's mine now," he said darkly. "And I don't share."

He saw Hermione's eyes widen with fear.

Draco raised his wand.

 _Forgive me Granger._

"CRUCIO!" He cast. She screamed in pain and Draco bit the inside of his cheek hard enough to taste the metallic of his own blood once more.

Bellatrix clapped him on the shoulder.

"Guess you are a little dragon after all," she kissed his cheek. "Sorry to have doubted you sweetie." She smiled up at him turned "I'm going to go play," she said with a wave and walked out.

"To the cellar," said Lucius, who seemed shaken by his son's violence. "Take her to the cellar."

Draco nodded. Greyback's eyes were on him and he felt the heat and anger in them.

 _You're not going to give up so easily are you Greyback?_

"Father would you pay the mutt so he can get on his way?" asked Draco wanting Greyback gone.

"Right of course," Lucius straightened turning to Greyback. "Follow me then."

The drawing room emptied of all but Draco and Hermione.

She was crying softly and Draco hated himself and her in that moment.

 _Why did it have to be you who got left behind?_ he asked silently. _Why not the Weasel? Why you?_

Draco waved his mother's wand, he could feel it obey him, unhappily. It didn't fit in his hand the same way his had.

Draco waved it smoothly and chandelier pulled itself back together piece by piece and returned to the ceiling, missing a few links here and there. He tried to make new ones, but the wand balked and Draco decided not to push. The statue in the corner likewise came back together. All the while the sound of Granger sobbing was like thunderstorm to Draco.

When there was nothing left to be repaired in the room Draco took a deep breath turned to Hermione.

"You can walk or I can levitate you there," he said simply.

Granger didn't respond. He reached for her to help her up and she clawed at his hand her nails tearing the skin by the base of his thumb. Draco hissed in pain.

 _You deserved that, after what you did to her._

Draco waved the wand and Granger rose in the held captive by the invisible bonds of the magic. She fought uselessly against the restraints.

Draco walked her down the corridor and down the steps to the cellar when he opened the door he gagged at the smell.

Blood.

There was blood all around and on the floor in a rumpled mess lay Wormtail, eyes bulging and throat torn out.

Draco turned away to the wall for a moment.

 _I can't believe Potter would do this,_ Draco shook his head and fought back the urge to vomit.

The spell dropped and so did Hermione. Without so much as a seonds hesitation Hermione turned to run. She made it two steps before Draco caught her pinning her against the stairs. She beat at his chest. He grabbed hold of them wrestling them down and pinned her arms beneath him.

"Let me go!"

"No."

"Let me go!"

"I can't!" he bellowed at her and she froze. "Don't you understand?" he shook his head and spoke quietly. "I can't let you go."

Granger slumped in his arms and turned her face away.

She suddenly felt so soft in his arms. He became acutely aware of how his body was pressed up against hers and pulled back before she could notice his body's unabashed physical reaction to being pressed close to a warm blooded woman.

Draco felt a swift desire to pick her up and carry her away from the horrors of his life and this mansion. He wanted to leave this place and escape with her.

 _Idiot, you can't let yourself think like that,_ he scolded himself. _You are stuck here and so is she so just...make the best of it._

"I need to clean up the mess," said Draco. He waved the wand and ropes appeared fastening her ankles together and binding her wrists in the same manner.

"Stay," he ordered, holding up his hand.

She gave him a look that would wither a plant.

He walked back into the room. He still couldn't believe that Potter and the Weasely had killed Wormtail.

Hang on a second, though Draco as he paused to take a closer look. As he inspected the wound it became obvious that the damage had been inflicted by Wormtail's own metallic hand.

Draco swallowed.

 _Never trust a gift from the dark Lord._

Draco waved his mothers wand muttering a spell and Wormtail's body lifted and floated up the stairs on its own and out towards the courtyard. He had never really liked the man and yet it still somehow seemed wrong that he would go without a funeral. He waved the wand again and the blood began to dissipate in golden flecks until there was no sign of the horror left.

Draco took a deep breath and went out to the stairs. He lifted Granger with the wand, careful not to touch her himself, and brought her into the cellar.

Finding a clean dry spot he laid her down gently. She wouldn't look at him.

He didn't blame her.

"You can't escape," he said. He waited a beat expecting some kind of a response. She gave none.

You really are a stubborn witch, he thought shaking his head.

Nothing you say is going to keep her from trying to break free.

"You won't escape," said Draco again and then added. "Try not to hurt yourself when you try anyways." Draco removed the spell tying her down. He tried not to let his eyes linger as she pulled her arms around her body.

Draco turned away and left locking the door behind him.

* * *

Taking the stairs two at a time Draco made his way back up to his room.

He wanted the safety of his wardrobe: the space he had always gone to when things got rough. He wanted the comfort of a warm sandy beach and clear cool water.

Draco entered into his bedroom and locked the door behind him. His eyes flicked instinctively from side to side to see if anyone was there. His wardrobe contained a secret he had kept for years and he wasn't about to let that secret out in the midst of all this chaos. When Draco was sure that he was alone he went to the wardrobe at the far side of his room. The massive wooden piece was taller than he was and wider than his full arm span. It was an antique, carved with beautiful patterns that had worn with the passing of time.

Please work, please work, he silently begged closing his eyes.

He spoke the incantation to open the hidden place within his wardrobe and...nothing happened.

He was locked out of the space he had made for himself.

Draco felt an instant and deep sense of despair. He had lost access to the one place he could find peace.

 _Damn it all, I need my wand back._

Draco began pacing across the floor, back and forth feeling restless.

"What the hell were you thinking trying to protect her?!" he growled angrily, his voice barely above a whisper.

 _She hates you, why bother trying to save someone who hates your guts._

She hated him before he had turned his mother's wand on her; now she would him probably hex him a hundred ways from Tuesday if she got the chance.

 _You couldn't just let them kill her,_ the voice in his head argued with him.

 _Yes you could have,_ the darker side thought back. _All you would have had to do was keep your mouth shut and close your eyes and you wouldn't be in this current predicament._

He somehow knew that would have been worse, This was Hermione Granger, he was thinking about. She was the reason he was second in all of his classes instead of first. She was the reason his father constantly berated him and had turned to violence

 _"Second to a Mudblood, you're a disgrace to this family Draco"_ the words echoed in Draco's memory and he squeezed his eyes shut trying to block it out. He let out a hiss of pain at the motion having temporarily forgotten about the cut over his eye.

Now, what was he supposed to do? He would be damned if he could just sit around and let them torture her for hours on end. He wouldn't…couldn't listen to her screams.

 _But you made her scream when you cursed her._

Draco pressed his hands to his temples and let out a strangled cry. He went over to the wardrobe again and pressed his forehead against the polished dark wood. There was no Narnia behind the door, no magical Lion to solve his problems or grant wisdom or gift-there was only his hideaway, a place where he could find some semblance of peace; a place currently out of reach.

 _You had to hurt her to prove you weren't soft on her. You didn't have a choice._

 _You should have thought of a better way._

 _There was no other way. Bellatrix wouldn't have believed anything less,_ his mind argued sending volleys of thoughts back and forth.

"Damn you Potter why couldn't you just save her yourself you great twat?! Had to leave your best friend behind for me to pick up the mess!" He half yelled out loud to his room. Draco knocked his desk chair and let out a curse. And the weasel, he sneered. Weren't they supposed to be an item? Draco had seen the way Ron had looked at Hermione. There was no world in which Draco would have left someone he cared about that much behind.

Of course…there never really had been someone he had cared about that much.

Draco stepped away from the wardrobe he lashed out with the wand and sent his nightstand flying. It smashed into the wall and shattered sending splinters across the floor.

"Draco?" his mother knocked on the door."

"Come in," he answered.

Narcissa stepped into his room and looked around and the chaos. Her chin lifted as if the mess were beneath her.

"I would like my wand back," she said plainly and held out her hand waiting.

Draco handed over the wand. With a flick of her wrist everything in the room returned to its place neatly. She let out small sound of satisfaction and then turned to Draco.

"Hold still," Narcissa ordered and she cast a healing spell over the dozens of little cuts which had been itching annoyingly since the Dark Lord had cauterized them. He felt the coolness of the spell and let out a deep sigh of relief. "That's better," said his mother and he felt her hand on the side of his face. "I really wish he hadn't ordered this one to heal naturally," she said examining the cut.

"Will you love me less if I am hideously scarred?" asked Draco, only partially joking.

"Don't be absurd," said Narcissa. "We can always cast a glamour on it."

Draco felt a mild stab of is sadness at his mothers response: Not, 'I would love you no matter what', but 'We can hide it'

"Come down for dinner," she said and kissed his cheek lightly before turning to go.

"Yes mother."

Draco scowled at the ground. His stomach growled.

He would eat and then he could figure it out.

* * *

Dinner was fillet minion with a side of broccoli drizzled in a cheese that was as expensive as it was smelly.

Everything was delicious, or should have been. Every few moments Draco's mind would drift to Hermione in the cellar and the food became a sickening paste in his mouth. After the fourth time of it happening he waved his hand and the plate was taken away.

He scowled down at the table.

"It's alright Draco," consoled his aunt. "We will get them, no need to pout."

"I'm not pouting," answered Draco, though he knew his tone only confirmed he was.

Bellatrix laughed.

Draco felt his cheeks heat with anger and embarrassment. He stood.

"Excuse me," he turned and went through the kitchen. He hesitated a moment as he passed the basket of fresh baked rolls and his hand darted out to pick one. He carried it unceremoniously to the cellar.

"Go away you cowardly ferret," she choked out at him.

"Shut it," His temper which was already stoked from his aunts comment, flared.

He could tell by Granger's voice that she was upset, but that didn't change the fact that he hated the name 'Ferret'. The memory of being turned into that horrible little creature was one of his worst memories from his time at Hogwarts.

He closed the cellar door behind him locking them both in the room.

"I didn't come here for you to berate me and call me names. I came to bring you food. I'm almost regretting it now since you're being such a cow."

"A cow!" Hermione. "How dare you?!" Hermione swung at him Draco dodged and grabbed her arm mid swing.

Hermione let out a cry of pain as his hand clamped down tight over the wound in her arm.

"You're the one who started with the animal insults!" he snapped pointedly.

"Please let go," he voice wavered and Draco felt a pang of remorse.

He released her and she dropped to the floor clutching her arm to her chest.

He reached for his wand to heal her arm and found nothing.

 _Dammit._

"I'll be back in a moment." He tossed the bread at her. "Eat if you're hungry. You never know when you'll be fed next. If you keep this up I might not want to bother sneaking food for you," the words came out more harshly, and more snide then he intended.

Frustration simmered under Draco's skin.

 _Why are you being so cruel to her?_

 _She just called me a Ferret when all I was doing was bringing her food._

 _You tortured her less than two hours ago. Do think a bread roll makes up for that?_

Draco marched angrily up the stairs to the corridor and then down a second set of stairs at the far end of the hall to the potions lab that his father had made for him the first year when his family had discovered his aptitude for potions. The room had been nothing more than storage space for old family heirlooms. Narcissa had been more than happy for the excuse to clean out the the 'mess'. They had used the money from selling several of the items to refinish the room into a potions lab fit for a professional potions master. Money wasn't an object for them...but his father had been less than excited about spending it on a son who was only the second best student in his year.

 _"Well he's the best in potions,"_ his mother had said. " _So lets focus on that shall we?"_

Lucius had begrudgingly agreed to save face.

Draco needed to save face now. He couldn't go and ask his mother for her wand, not for something as kind as healing Granger's wounds. His mother would know what spells he cast from his wand and he didn't need to bring her into this.

Yes, his mother had offered to let him use her wand when necessary in their conversation over dinner, and Draco had intended on taking her up on the offer. Still, for the sake of safety he would need to get a wand of his own. As much as he wanted his own personal wand back-the one he had had since before he started his first year at Hogwarts-he also knew that waiting for the chance to get that back from Potter would mean waiting too long. He needed something now. He knew he would need to convince his mother to go and get another wand, hopefully she would be agreeable.

 _Just tell her you feel unsafe without your own wand._

 _Yeah and she'll either start babying you again or tell you to grin and bear it._

Draco shook his head and went over to the cabinet where he kept his personal home-made potions, and picked up several vials of of healing potions. Since he couldn't use his wand to heal Hermione, he had to go another route. Hopefully his healing potions were up to the task...they had never been his strongest suit. Tucking several between his arm and chest he carried them back to her.

Draco returned to the cellar and walked over to Granger. Kneeling he took hold of her arm.

"Let go!" she demanded as she tried pull away.

"Hold still," His grasp tightened.

"What are you doing?" she twisted and hissed in pain as she hurt herself trying to get away from him. She was like a wounded animal trying to get away from a vet that was only trying to help.

"Goddamn it Granger hold still."

"No. I won't let you just touch me however you want."

Draco froze at her words and their implication.

 _Does she think that I meant what I said upstairs?_ he balked.

 _Does she actually think that I would take Greyback place and force myself on her?_

Draco's cheeks flamed with heat.

"Now you listen to me Granger and you listen fucking carefully because I don't feel like repeating myself again," said Draco darkly "I stuck my neck out for you today. If it weren't for me your be dead or with Greyback and we both know what he had planned for you."

"Am I supposed to thank you!?" she shouted back. "Because falling prey to your desires is so much better than Greybacks. You're just as much a monster as he is!"

Draco's arm flew at her and stopped a hairbreadth from her face. His nostrils flared at her.

 _You almost hit her...You almost proved to be the monster._

He grabbed hold of her chin.

"I am. Not. Like. Him." Draco ground out.

He let her go, stood, and tossed a vial at her.

"Tend to your own wounds since you're too damn stubborn to let me. Don't come crying for me to fix the ones you can't reach." he stormed out of the room slamming the door behind him.

* * *

Hermione was too shocked to move for a moment after Draco left.

His words hung in the air around her.

 _"I am. Not. Like. Him."_

Wasn't he thought? He had told everyone that she was his to claim and that no one else was allowed to touch her. Why say that if he wasn't going to take advantage of that claim.

 _You can't trust him,_ she told herself, _this is Draco Malfoy._

 _Then why help me?_ She wondered, replaying his last words. She looked at the vials.

 _He's probably just trying to lull you into a false sense of safety._

Right now Hermione didn't care. She was in pain and even if it was just to mess with her she wasn't going to turn down a chance to heal up. She needed to stay strong for her friends. She opened up a vial and began tending to her cuts and bruises. The salve felt wonderful and smelled of aloe and soothing rose petals.

She sighed her eyelids fluttering in bliss.

It felt good.

Too good.

Why was he being kind to her? Why not just take what he wanted? Was this all just a game for him?

 _I won't be a play toy._

Hermione took a deep breath.

 _I will survive_ , she told herself. Somehow she would make it through this. Draco may be her enemy, but he had saved her life...or at least postponed her death which meant she had time and time was something she could use to make a plan and solve the problem of her escape.

A part of Hermione had half expected her friends to come fetch her immediately, with Dobby being able to apparate in and out. She had seen the little house elf when she had looked up, just before the chandelier had fallen on top of her.

What if something had happened to them? What if they weren't okay and that's why they hadn't come back to rescue her right away? What if Harry or Ron were...

 _No_ , She shook her head. _They're fine, they have to be fine._

Hermione heard voices chattering loudly up the stairs about fresh wards and protective spells being cast on the house and her hopes slowly died.

she Knew her friends would come for her, what she didn't know is if they would get to her in time.

Hermione's thoughts turned back to Draco. Why had he saved her life? Why intervene against Greyback taking her and then turned around and tortured her in front of everyone? It made no sense, unless what he said really was true and he just wanted her as his own personal play thing as revenge for their school days…

 _You're bound to him now_ , the thought came into her head and she looked down at the fine lines by her wrist. In the dull light of the cellar she could barely see them, and yet to her they stood out almost as badly as the wound Bellatrix had inflicted.

At least one of those two would heal and fade. No matter what happened she would always have a reminder that she was irrevocably and permanently bound to the boy who had tormented her for years in school. Then she though about the strange sensation she had felt when the binding had taken place. There was pain and then for a brief moment she had felt an awareness of Draco and it hadn't been as cold or as cruel as she would have expected.

And Draco had been cruel.

Memories from school came flooding back of the first time Malfoy had called her a Mudblood. It was after Malfoy's father had bought the whole Slytherin team new brooms and secured his son's position as seeker. Hermione had dared to publicly call Draco out about it and he had retaliated full force with words that were forever burned into her memory:

 _"Shut up you filthy little mudblood, no one asked you."_

Hermione closed her eyes and tried to shove those horrible memories back into the darkest corners of her mind. THAT was who Draco Malfoy was. THAT was the kind of behavior she had been trained to expect from him.

 _He saved your life_ , her mind countered.

 _So he could play with me_ , she answered back.

 _He saved you from Greyback...he said he would never touch you like that..._ Draco's eyes had been fierce and angry when he had told her that. He seemed almost offended that she had dared suggest he would.

 _Probably_ _because he would never want to sleep with someone who is so much beneath him. Don't forget how he sees you._

 _And now he's bound to you for life...I bet he hates you for that._

Maybe that was why he had seemingly had no issue with inflicting the CRUCIATUS CURSE on her. Well she would pick the pain of Draco's spells again every day over the fate of Greyback taking her. Still she hated Draco for inflicting Crucio on her. It was hands don't the most physically painful thing she had ever experienced.

Time elapsed and the reality of her situation began to sink in. She was alone in the cold, in the dark. Her friends had left without her…left her behind. She looked down at her arm. A small sob escaped her, then another

She moved to put the salve across the word Bellatrix had carved into her skin and it burned instead of soothing the wound.

She let out a cry.

The flesh knit shut but instead of healing flat it bubbled into an ugly scar.

"No," she rubbed at it. "No!" she cried louder.

She didn't want this scar, it was supposed to fade. She was supposed to be able to forget. Now it would be there forever.

She burst into tears.

* * *

Draco paced the hall.

Why?

The question rang over in his head again and again.

He hated that she thought, that she had even considered, him capable of what she had suggested.

It turned his stomach. He had never, would never force someone, he could never rape someone-it was a different kind of wrong.

Granger screaming grabbed Draco's attention yanked him away from his thoughts and pacing.

Without thinking he ran to her.

"You did this," she yelled when she saw him "You did it on purpose!" she threw the vial at his head.

Draco ducked and it smashed behind him shattering into a hundred pieces against the wall.

"What are you on about?!" Draco demanded.

"This!" Hermione held up her arm for him to see and Draco stopped in his tracks at the sight of the scar.

The word his aunt had carved into Granger's arm was puckered into an ugly raised pink scar.

"I..." Draco stammered not knowing what to say.

"Don't pretend Draco! How could you...I hate you. I hate you." Hermione yelled at Draco then she turned and began pounding her fists against the wall wildly. One of her knuckles began to bleed.

What few items were in the room began to fly around her violently propelled by the force of her power and anguish.

"Stop it Granger, stop you're going to hurt yourself." Draco dashed in front of her and grabbed her wrists. One of her hands slipped free and she slapped him hard across the cheek.

Granger froze clearly realizing what she had done.

It was different than the time she had punched him in the face and broke his nose...somehow the slap felt more vicious.

 _She didn't mean it Draco calm down_ , he ordered himself. _The mark on her arm just turned into a scar that will likely disfigure her for life and she thinks you did it on purpose_.

Draco took a deep breath and blinked back against the dark stars her slap had brought into his field of vision.

"I didn't..." he began then swallowed.

 _You don't have to justify yourself to her,_ he told himself.

 _I don't want her thinking that I scarred her like that on purpose._

 _Why not?_

Hermione trembled against him and he could feel her legs give way.

Draco eased her down to the ground kneeling with her.

"I didn't do that to you Granger. If I had known I wouldn't have let you put the salve on it. Bellatrix must have cursed the mark," his voice was gentle.

The fight went out of Granger and she slumped against the back the support beam behind her.

He held her for a moment longer making sure she wasn't going to pass out. Her skin felt surprisingly soft against his hands.

"This is hell," she said her voice cracking.

 _Yes,_ Draco answered her in his mind, _it is._

"You'll survive it," he said without thinking,

 _You shouldn't encourage her, if she thinks that you're on her side...she'll rely on you too much and get you both killed._

"What do you care?" Hermione shot.

 _You have to lie,_ his mind screamed at him, _make her believe you hate her too, that way everyone else will believe it-its the only way to protect her.  
_

 _Why do you want to protect her?_ the darker part of his mind asked.

 _I don't know,_ he answered back honestly, _I just...do._

"Why am I here Malfoy. Why do you care?"

Draco stood up over her and with all the faked conviction he could muster said:

"I don't"

* * *

 **Authors note: This chapters edits involved a lot of typing and fleshing things out, as a result this updated version is over 2k longer than the original. This chapter also involved a huge amount of edits and fine tuning of Draco's thoughts. When I went back to edit I found that Draco's thoughts were not quite where I wanted them and so I have shifted some comments while leaving the overall flavor the same. Hopefully this makes for a more smooth reading experience for everyone and I hope you enjoy what I have done. Just as a reminder, in case you didn't catch it. Bellatrix does still have her wand because things played out a little differently in "The Chandelier" than they did in the original story.**

 **Thanks for much for reading. Please leave a review if you enjoyed reading. Cheers**


	5. Chapter 3: The Wand

**A big thank you to those who reviewed the original update for this chapter:** Scorpia11, Elliebeanz, ChildofBrisingr **,** Cinnamon Silver Tiger. **And thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and Review since, you are all appreciated.  
**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 3: The Wand

The moon was so bright it made the stars seem dim.

Hermione stood there, silhouetted in silver light, her curly hair a fuzzy halo around her head. A soft, knee-length dress flowed around her clinging gently to her skin.

Draco reached for her touching her bare shoulder lightly.

She turned to him, eyes wide and open and peaceful.

No pain or hate clouded them.

She looked at him and a small smile touched the corner of her mouth.

Draco reached up gently and slid his hand from her shoulder up to her neck. Her skin was so soft, so warm.

His hand gently wove into her gorgeous mane. He could smell the soft scent of her shampoo. He closed his eyes and inhaled.

When he opened them she was still looking up at him, chin tilted upwards.

Hermione lips parted and Draco bent his head forwards towards her waiting lips...

And Woke.

Draco blinked at the ceiling. He felt oddly disoriented, like he had been somewhere else. Now he was laying in his bed looking up at his ceiling. The dream came back to him.

 _What the hell was that?_

The dream replayed in his head.

 _I was going to kiss her...why the hell would I dream that?_

Draco had never thought about Hermione that way.

Well maybe once...after the Yule ball, but everyone had been talking about her that night. No one had expected the nerdy fuzzy haired Hermione Granger to show up looking like...well hot.

Even after that night though, he hadn't dreamed about her or fantasized about kissing her; not once, not ever.

 _Why now?_

He was hard, and it was more than just typical morning wood.

The dream had done it to him, the way she had looked in that dress.

 _I don't want to think of her like that,_ he told himself, meaning it.

Draco closed his eyes and slipped his hands down under the blankets and bellow his pajama bottoms to ease the ache.

He groaned at first touch. Closing his his eyes Draco tried to relax his head back against the pillow. He pulled up images in his mind of past times with other girls. Of, blond hair and full red lips, of black hair and thin pink lips. His hands moved over himself with practiced movements. His eyelids fluttered ad an image of Hermione's hand replacing his own had his hips bucking and his climax hitting him unexpectedly.

"Fuck."

He shuddered as he finished, small spasms causing his stomach to flex and twitch.

"Fuck," he said again when his breathing evened. He was unhappy where his lasts thoughts had gone of their own accord, and unhappier still that it had been what had tipped him over.

 _I don't want to think of her like that,_ he repeated to himself.

Draco reached to his bedside table for his wand to clean up the mess. His hand brushed the empty space where it should be.

"Dammit," he let out a sigh, rolled out of bed and stormed to his en-suite bathroom. He waved his hand and the waterfall shower began. The room filled with a pleasant steam He got under the spray to wash away the evidence of his morning activities and without thinking tilted his head back.

The hot water hit the swollen flesh around Draco's eye and his knees buckled sending him to the grey marbled floor.

He clutched at his face and waved his hand. The water stopped and he stayed kneeling for a moment.

He took several slow breaths until the pain was manageable.

The dull throb had been with him all morning, but he had forgotten just how bad it was. The water was an ugly reminder of what his face looked like and the slow healing process that he had to look forward to for the next few days...or maybe even weeks.

Draco couldn't remember the last time he had been injured and had to let things heal naturally.

Potter's Sectumsempracurse in the bathroom had taken a day to heal fully even with Snape's help, but that was different.

This would take days. Days when he was used to, even as a child, having cuts and bruises healed with magic almost instantly.

Granger had grown up like this, without magic to heal, only mere muggle medicine.

 _No wonder she's tough,_ the thought flitted through his mind.

Draco took a breath and waved his hand slowly.

The waterfall turned back on and he showered, careful to keep the water at a temperature so that the steam didn't irritate the wound.

When he was done he pulled in a pair of black slacks and carefully donned a v-neck charcoal grey sweater, thankful for the open neck.

He glanced at the mirror. The outfit looked sharp on him, tapered and fit.

His face however...the cut by his eye had swollen.

He looked ugly, or rather it did. It was going to leave a scar from his eyebrow across his lid. He only hoped it wouldn't be too bad. He had used his looks his whole life to get what he wanted and needed, they were a tool in his arsenal.

The eye itself felt okay. Not great…but not swollen or overly irritated, which made him thankful that he didn't have to worry about going blind. It was nothing more than superficial wound.

 _Her scar is worse, you have no right to complain,_ Draco thought as an image of Hermione holding up her scarred arm to him passed through his mind.

Draco let out a frustrated breath through his nostrils and trotted down the stairs.

His mother was awake and sitting sipping tea at the head of the table. His father was nowhere to be seen.

It used to be that he would always sit in the mornings with Narcissa, but things had changed since falling out of the dark Lord's favor.

Draco sat and his mother enchanted a hot plate of eggs Benedict in front of him that looked and smelled marvelous.

"Mother."

"Yes?" she set the paper down with mild curiosity. The Malfoy's were not the type of family to talk much at the table.

"I need a new wand."

"You can use mine when you need it," she answered simply and returned to her paper.

"I can't," Draco replied, careful to keep his voice respectful.

Narcissa raised a perfectly curved brow.

Draco had been raised under the strict rule that he was not supposed to disagree or contradict his parents. He could see her thinking, debating a response, and then she lifted the paper and turned her eyes back to the print.

"Eat up," she said. "I have friends coming in the afternoon for tea. I don't want to be out for hours."

"Thank you," said Draco some of the tension leaving his shoulders. He didn't dare express just how much it meant to him that she had agreed to take him wand shopping. He felt naked and vulnerable without his wand and the sooner he could dispel that feeling the better.

Draco dug in, eating quickly.

"Did you feed her yet?" asked Draco When he was half finished His own breakfast.

"No," Narcissa said flatly.

"Are we going to?" He asked trying to sound mildly curious, instead of like her had a vested interest in Granger's comfort.

"Finish you meal Draco," Narcissa ordered with a dual dismissive and authoritative tone. "I want to leave."

* * *

Thanks to the Dark Lord, Olivander's was out of the question so, at his mother's discretion, they traveled by flu to Paris to Cosme Acajor's wand shop in the heart of Rue Claudel.

A small bell chimed as they entered the shop and Draco was surprised at how different it was from Olivander's. It was much brighter and seemed much better organized. The almost cosy feel of Olivander's was no where to be seen or felt in the simple neat facad of Cosme Acajor's wand shop.

Slightly off to the side of the front desk was a woman crouched over a work table. Her chestnut hair was tied back in a strict bun and she wore a look of total focus.

"Un moment s'il vous plait," she said politely without so much as sparing a glance their way.

There was a great whirl of blue light and a snap and the woman sat back rolling her shoulders.

"C'est Fini." She turned and Draco was taken back by how young the woman looked.

Her face was pleasant, and yet she held a regal air.

"Je ne parle pas francais," said Narcissa. "Parlez-vous Anglais?"

Judging by the wand maker's face his mother's accent left something to be desired. The lady seemed seemed to appreciate the effort though.

"Oui madam," The wand-maker removed her glasses letting them hang on their golden chain. "I can speak English fluently. My name is Astrid Acajor, and I am at your service, but I must ask, what brings you all the way to Paris when the great Olivander is in your country?" The question was quite fair.

"He isn't at his shop," Narcissa answered smoothly and without hesitation. "In these dark times one cannot be sure of anyone's return when they go missing. It is for that reason also we are in haste to get my son a new wand."

"But of course I am happy to help. What was your last wand monsieur?"

"Unicorn hair heart with Hawthorn, ten inches," answered Draco

"I do believe I have a wand similar though the length is not the same. It should not be too much of an issue." Astrid waved her wand and the shelves of the shop rotated smoothly. Draco looked up to see that they were all on a track. He was impressed and watched as the little triangular boxes passed in front of them until the shelves stopped and Astrid picked up one of the boxes and opened it, pulling aside the tissue paper she lifted it handing it gently over to Draco.

It was longer than his old wand closer to twelve inches and the handle was much more innately carved.

"Go ahead," the woman encouraged gesturing to a large clay vase in the corner.

Draco waved the wand towards it and the vase lifted but instead of obeying his movements it flew up to the ceiling and then crashed back into the floor shattering.

"Are you sure this is unicorn and hawthorn?" Draco challenged feeling embarrassed by how badly it had reacted to him.

"Of course I am. I know my wands monsieur," Astrid answered a little haughtily.

"Don't be rude Draco," Narcissa scolded.

"You saw what happened," Draco gestured to the vase.

"The wand does not to like you," Astrid said simply, taking back the wand and laying it gently in its box, replacing it on the shelf. "C'est Dommage."

"But my wand was Unicorn and Hawthorn and worked for me every time," Draco insisted.

"That was your old wand. You have grown since then no doubt and it let you, it grew with you. I think monsieur you are in a different place now than you were. Perhaps you need a new wand to match you." she turned to Narcissa. "What is your wand madam?"

"Elm, unicorn hair. 11 inches," answered his mother politely.

"Alors, I will see if I have something similar," answered Astrid with a nod.

"Her wand works for me, but not as well as I would like," added Malfoy. "There are spells I cannot do with it."

"That is because it is your mothers wand," said Astrid. "but perhaps a new one will choose you."

She turned and waved her wand, the shelves only shifted slightly before stopping. Retrieving another box she handed him the second wand.

Draco turned back to see that the vase he had destroyed only moments before was whole again and was impressed that the owner of the shop had thought of a way to let wizards test the wands without making much of a mess. Draco vaguely remembered the shelves exploding at Olivander's while finding his first wand.

Draco waved the wand at the vase and it shattered instantly.

Narcissa inhaled sharply and Draco handed the wand back to Astrid.

"I think your mother's wand only helped you because your mother wished it," said Astrid blinking down at him. "Your father's wand?" she asked.

"Elm and Dragon heartstring," Draco and Narcissa answered in unison.

"I am afraid I do not have one of those in at the moment. Dear Olivander, genius though he may be, only uses his three cores. However, they are not the only cores that can be used...still, let me fetch a few of my unicorn hair to see what we can find."

She picked several boxes off the shelves as they turned and spun for her.

Draco went through them one by one.

Two shattered the vase again and another turned it to ash.

Astrid put all the rejected wand back into their boxes neatly and returned them to the shelves. Then a strange look crossed her face and she waved her wand with an extra sweep. This time the shelves moved for several moments before a shelf came into view that only have a handful of wands on it. They were the only shelves in the store that appeared to have been neglected. A fine layer of dust covered the boxes. She picked out a simple black triangular box with a silver pattern on the front.

Even the box looked older than all the others.

Astrid opened the box carefully to reveal a simple wand of light brown with tinges of red through.

There was nothing decorative or ornate about the wand save for a slight notch were a thumb might rest.

"What is that?" asked Draco not recognizing the wood.

"Give it a try." she smiled and nodded towards the vase.

Draco picked up the wand and the room seemed to exhale.

Warmth radiated from the wand up his arm wrapping him in a magical embrace.

He waved the wand and this time the vase lifted gently mirroring his movements perfectly.

A strange sensation sung through Draco's veins, it was as if the wand 'wanted' to help him. It terrified him and pleased him at the same time. When he looked back at the woman there was a smile on her face which had an almost haunted edge.

"I have been waiting my whole life to see who that wand would choose," she said with a quiet reverence.

"What is it?" Draco asked again, this time with more than a mild curiosity.

"My great Grandmother made this wand from materials she collected while traveling the world," answered Astrid. "The wood you see is called hophornbeam...But it goes by another name which it earns by virtue of how dense it is. The wand you are holding is made from a tree commonly known as Ironwood. Very strong, and resistant to the blade, yet flexible. It was used to make longbows at one point..."

"And the core?" asked Draco.

"Pegasus."

"Pegasus?" Narcissa asked incredulously.

"Yes, in our world there are many breeds of winged horses, Abraxan, Aethonan, Granian," she listed. "But the Pegasus is one that we do not see. They are said to all be too wild and too much made of spirit to be tamed. One chose to help a wizard long, long ago in ancient Greece. Bellerophon, rode a pure white winged horse. It is believed Pegasus bred with several other mortal breeds of horse and they became the winged species we now know…but the real Pegasus is more potent, not a half breed but a pure magical creature of freedom. The Pegasus of legend helped Bellerophon defeat the great three headed monster known as the Chimera. It is a creature of great strength."

"Those are only legends, I have never heard of an actual Pegasus," said Narcissa.

"Mon dieu," Astrid let out a huff. "And where do legends come from? " she said exasperated "You as a magic user should know that sometimes they come from imagination and sometimes from truth. I watched my grandmother make her three wands from silver hairs and I can tell you. I have never seen light like that go into a wand, not before and not since." Astrid put away the other wands as she spoke all the while never taking her eyes off Draco for more than a second at a time. "My grandmother believed that this wand, in particular was, destined for greatness. A wizard who needs the aid of an iron will, faced with a great task and the need to be adaptable will find its partner in this wand."

Draco swallowed.

He did not want a wand destined for greatness.

His mother however seemed satisfied with how passionate Astrid herself sounded about the wand.

"Is it fickle? Will it serve him well?" Narcissa asked.

"The Pegasus hair core wands have a mind of their own," Astrid answered folding her hands. "My grandmother noted that with the first two wands. However…when they choose their wizard they are fiercely loyal. Both the wizards who wielded the other two were buried with their wands"

"I presume the cost is reflective of their rarity?" said Narcissa with a slightly snide tone to her.

"I am sure it within the pocket depth of a Malfoy," answered Astrid.

Narcissa, was taken slightly aback.

 _She's knows who I am and she's still willing to help us?_ thought Draco and he found himself wondering if that was because she didn't care about all the insanity going on with the Dark Lord's return or whether it was because of which wand had chosen him.

"Yes," continued Astrid with a nod. "I know who you are," she handed the wand back to Draco. "May this wand help you defeat your three headed monster young master Draco."

Draco took the wand again and he had the strange impression that the wand was happy with him for doing so.

He tucked his new wand away in his robes.

Narcissa paid Astrid and they walked out onto the street. The mid afternoon sun ws high in the sky and it was a remarkably peaceful day out. There were birds singing from the trees that lined the street and people were milling about without a care in the world.

 _This is what its like_ , Draco thought looking around, _when you don't worry every second of the day if your house guest is going to turn around and kill you._

Draco took a deep breath in closing his eyes and savoring the feel of the warm sun on his face.

All of a sudden Draco's chest squeezed tight as if someone where giving him an over zealous bear hug. Instead of passing the feeling increased ten fold and Draco clutched his chest in a rush of panic his heart beat ratcheting inside his chest.

Hermione was in Danger, he could feel her fear like it was his own.

"Draco, what's wrong?" his mother was at his side immediately, her hand on his shoulder.

"Granger..." he choked. "I think it's the bind."

The feeling in his chest took over.

Granger was in danger.

He had to stop it.

Desperation clawed at him.

"We will get to the nearest flu," said his mother calmly.

"There's no time," gasped Draco

"It's too far to Apparate," warned Narcissa.

A part of Draco heard his mother's words, understood them and knew she was right.

A greater part didn't care at all.

Draco closed his eyes clutched his new wand and vanished.

* * *

Hermione had barely slept. What little sleep she had managed to catch was marred by nightmares that woke her quickly. The night seemed to drag on, and then the day was no better.

There was nothing to do in the cellar. She searched for some kind of a way out but the walls were made of stone and the door was magically locked with a nice little spell that gave her hand a good shock when she tried to pick and pry it open.

She couldn't sit still because every time that she did she found the place where Wormtail had lain staring at her.

She had woken hungry and no one came with food or water.

As the day rolled on and the emptiness of her stomach grew, she began to regret yelling at Draco when he had brought her food.

Maybe he was mad at her for it and so was letting her starve to make her more grateful.

 _That would be something he would do,_ she thought to herself, _power trip and try to make me beg. Well I won't. He won't win._

She hated him, and yet found herself wishing he would just come back to her. She was hungry and tired and alone and bored.

The silence of the cellar and the lack of reading material had her going loopy by lunch, which was when she heard footsteps.

"Malfoy?" she stood moving closer to the door.

The steps came closer, the footfall far too heavy for Draco.

Her stomach knotted with apprehension and she stepped back further into the cellar warily.

Greyback came into view.

"Hello pretty one," he said smiling and letting himself into the cellar with a quick flick of his wand.

Hermione retreated further back.

"You aren't supposed to touch me..." Hermione, backed against the support beam behind her. "Draco said-"

"Draco isn't here now," Greyback eyed her up and down and licked his lips.

"But...no. He'll know...you shouldn't." she panicked and then raised her chin. "The dark Lord wouldn't want it."

Greyback laughed the sound crawled over Hermione's skin and she shivered.

"The dark Lord doesn't give a shit what happens to a Mudblood like you."

 _No..._

Hermione shook her head.

This couldn't be happening.

Greyback lunged for her Hermione dodged driven by fear and pure survival instinct.

He clamored after her claws swiping. Her clothing, which was already tattered from the previous days encounter, fell prey to another tear exposing her bra. She clutched the fabric together trying to cover herself and made a run for the open door.

Her hand was on the handle when Greyback's hand caught her hair and he dragged her down to the ground pinning her beneath his big body.

"You re mine," he growled into her ear.

"No! Stop!" she clawed at Greyback's face drawing blood. He howled and backhanded her.

Stars clouded her vision.

"Please!" she cried out.

 _Not this, anything but this._

"Beg all you want, there is no one here to hear you."

Greyback reached for his belt.

Pure fear lanced through Granger and she bucked thrashing and kicking and clawing at him, doing everything she could to get away.

He hit her again and her head twisted to the side with the blow.

Her vision blurred into a haze and she blinked.

She saw a pair of shiny black shoes appear a few feet away before her world went totally black.

* * *

 ** ** **AUTHORS NOTE ON CANNON AND WANDS: I chose Elm and Unicorn hair for Narcissa's wand because we never are told what her wand is made of only that it looks similar to Lucius wand- as such what is visible (the wood) I kept the same, but I thought it would be nice is Draco and his mother had the same core for their original wands. As for his new wand, I put a lot of thought into it and I hope that you enjoy my choice.******

 ** ** **If you liked the scene/dream at the very beginning of the chapter and would like something that goes a bit further there is a smuttier alternative version of the dream in chapter 2 "The First Dream" of my fanfiction "Dreams and Love Scene"  
******


	6. Chapter 4: The Cellar

**A Big thank you to the original reviewers** Kayanacobriea1217 , kitkat2150, Anto Chia, , addictedtoloveandfiction, snowcoloredwolf **,** Scorpia11 and EndlessReign **And thank you to everyone else who has taken the time to fave and follow this story since. I appreciate each and every one of you.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 4: The Cellar

Draco apparated to the mansion front gate crossing the threshold at a run.

The wand was warm in his hand, his heartbeat pounding in his chest.

Her fear skyrocketed and Draco felt like he could barely breath.

As soon as he entered the house he apparated at a run into the cellar.

His eyes only took a moment to adjust to the dim lighting and assess the scene in front of him.

Disgust penetrated Draco's being right down to his very core.

Greyback was on top of Hermione with one hand down his pants.

She struggled against Greyback and he struck her hard sending her head to the side, her eyes rolling and then blinking closed.

Draco's wand lashed out of his own accord, he hadn't even realized he had lifted his arm to strike.

No words left his lips.

There was no incantation only hiss of breath.

Draco's anger burned out from his chest and channeled through the wand in a great gust of wind and blinding silver light which slammed into Greyback and sent him across the room. The big werewolf's body slammed into the wall with a loud thwack and the werewolf shook off the dust and tried to regain his bearings. Draco used the brief paused to step over Granger's motionless body and position himself between her Greyback.

Draco kept his wand pointed at Greyback.

"Expelliamus," Draco shouted the second Greyback reached to his own wand to retaliate.

The werewolf's wand flew up into the air turning over itself several times before dropping into Draco's waiting hand.

Draco straightened and held both pointed at Greyback. Greyback's wand felt odd and heavy in his hand.

"If you kill me you'll have to answer for it," the Werewolf snarled.

Draco sneered. _I don't care._

 _It's not worth it,_ his mind echoed in response, _if you go too far...if they think you've done too much... they'll take her._

Draco tossed his head back, his blond hair flicking away from his face.

"So I won't kill you then," he said haughtily.

He waited for the relief to cross Greyback's face before he let out a yell.

"Patrificus totalus," he cast and Greyback froze completely falling flat on his back with a loud thud.

Draco stepped forward and cast a dark spell. Spiders and other creatures began crawling across the floor towards Greyback.

He was a Slytherin after all and spells like this were something he and he classmates had a habit of practicing in the dungeons of the castle where no one complained about what they were doing. Not all Slytherin witches and wizards were dark or evil. Some were actually quite nice, decent, upstanding people...that said the drive to be the best. Ambition, cunning leadership and resourcefulness. _"Learn the rules so that you can break them properly."_

Draco knew the rules in this house with the Dark Lord as their ruler.

The strong survive.

The pure belong.

Draco was playing with fire, and there was a chance he would get burned.

 _No risk no reward,_ he told himself.

 _Well what is the reward here?_ his mind argued.

 _The personal satisfaction of seeing Greyback suffer,_ he answered back darkly. He had never liked the werewolf and he hated him now.

"You can't move, you can't flinch and you can't escape," Draco said sweetly. "But don't worry, I am sure someone will come and find you long before they nibble enough to kill you."

Even though Greyback's face was frozen Draco could sense the fury radiating off of him.

He took the Werewolf's wand and held it up he moved as if to break it and paused a fraction away from snapping.

 _You don't need to give him more reasons to want to kill you._

 _He'll be easier to defeat without his own wand._

 _But he'll be about ten times as pissed at you._

 _Like he isn't already,_ his internal voice said sarcastically.

Draco weighed his options-the dialogue in his head continuing for several more seconds before he spoke to Greyback.

"Remember I could have killed you and destroyed or kept your wand, and I didn't." Fear of consequences drove his actions.

He wanted to kill Greyback, but he couldn't.

 _It would probably be the safest thing to do, take him out of the picture._

Draco trembled at the thought.

 _I don't want to be a killer._

He had never wanted to kill Dumbledore. He wanted to kill the man in front of him.

Draco wanted to break Greyback's wand in front of him, but he knew that would only bring back a vengeance that could not be swayed. Wizards did not take kindly to having their wands broken. Hopefully this wand would show some loyalty to Draco for having been won in a fight, or at least be less likely to allow a curse. The hope was flimsy at best.

Draco turned away from Greyback and went to Hermione.

She was out cold.

He knelt down scooping her up into his arms, lifting her easily he tucked her against his body.

Draco exited the cellar and locked the door with his own wand then dropped Greyback's wand on the third step, just out of arms reach.

It was a dick move; he didn't care.

Draco took the steps two at a time and strode across the main hall.

To his right the fire place blazed to life with a great green fire. Narcissa stormed through, eyes blazing, she marched over to Draco and slapped him hard enough to turn his head with the force of the blow.

Tears sprung to his eyes from the impact.

His mother had rarely struck him so the blow stung in more than just a physical way.

"How dare you!" she snapped. "You will not risk your life for that Mudblood regardless of the Dark Lords desires. Do you understand me?" Her voice darkened.

Draco could see real rage in his mother's eyes.

She felt betrayed by his actions. He could also see fear. She had feared for his life. He had apparated far enough that he could have splinched, and that terrified her.

In retrospect it kind of terrified Draco, both the fact that he could have splinched and the fact that at the moment he had made the choice he hadn't cared.

The wand had taken him safely over the distance…and more than that it hadn't felt like a stretch. He had felt no difference in the apparation from Paris back to the mansion and the jump from the front of the mansion to the cellar.

Had the wand saved him?

"I'm sorry mother..." his voice was sincere. He hadn't meant to worry her and he knew that was the only reason for her current wrath "It was the bind," he used it as an excuse and it wasn't t entirely untrue.

He wanted to blame the bind for everything, but…he couldn't. Draco thought how the Dark Lord must have used the bind on others to torture couples, or ensure loyalty. Or to just hunt down those who chose to turn away from his cause. He barely cared about Hermione...she wasn't even his friend and yet he had felt the pull to help her so strongly that it had driven him to risk himself with a Paris to England jump. He could only imagine how it would have felt if she was someone he actually cared about.

Draco swallowed pushing aside those thoughts.

He addressed his mother once more knowing she needed him say something more to be satisfied.

"I've never felt anything like it before."

"Well next time you will know not to act so recklessly when you feel it!" She snapped and he winced.

Narcissa saw the wince and her features softened. She reached up to his cheek and her hand felt cool against the burning skin. She pulled away before lingering long and glanced down as if finally seeing Hermione in his arms for the first time.

"Is she alive?" asked Narcissa.

"Yes. Greyback is in the cellar...Paralyzed."

"Don't be foolish Draco," his mother chastised.

"I won't cow before him," It was Draco's turn to raise his voice. "The dark Lord is one thing, but I bow to no one in this house…save for you mother."

His words seemed to calm his mother slightly and quell her nerves about his actions.

"Good. Where are you taking her?"

"To my room."

"Draco," she touched his arm. "Be careful...this binding...don't let it cloud what she is. She is not your equal."

 _Your mother disowned her own sister for marrying a Mudblood. How do you think she would feel, you risking everything for the one in your arms?_ He mentally shook his head trying to send the thought away.

Draco inhaled slowly. His mother might love him, but she would never understand how talented and capable the witch in his arms really was. She would never accept her. Never.

 _Do you hear yourself?_ Draco asked.

"I know," answered Draco.

"Good," Narcissa straightened her shoulders rolling them back. An air of dignity curled itself around her like a mink scarf. "I'll take care of Greyback. He isn't welcome here without the Dark Lord present as well." She stepped back. "This may be where the Dark Lord has chosen to set up shop, but this is still my house." With that she turned heel and walked away.

Draco felt Granger stir in his arms and looked down at her face. She looked up at him eyes big and brown and unfocused, one pupil was distinctly larger than the other.

 _She has a concussion,_ he noted.

"It's okay Granger," he said softly, his arms inadvertently tightening around her as he made his way up the stairs. "I've got you."

She blinked up at him once, twice and then closed her eyes once more.

Draco hesitated at the threshold to his room.

He didn't take women into his room often. Most of his conquests took place at school. Few were worthy of being brought back home, either by his standards or those of his parents.

He breathed deep and then walked inside closing and locking the door behind him.

The silence of the room enveloped him. Draco took her over to the bed and lay her down gently on top of the covers. Her hair spilled out beneath her, a wild tangled mess.

Pulling out his wand Draco murmured the words a healing spell. The light from his wand was tinged a beautiful silver. He watched it as it caressed Hermione's skin and settled around her face. The tension eased from her brow almost immediately.

He relaxed slightly as she did and that's when he realized her shirt was torn.

A part of him had noticed before, but with the chaos of everything going on in the cellar he had put it out of his mind. Now that she was laying there in his bed he became acutely aware of it.

For a moment he couldn't tear his eyes away from the simple turquoise bra. Functional and satin look, it was subtly sexy. Her chest rose and fell with her breathing and his eyes were drawn to the curve of her perfect breast.

 _You perv._

Draco swallowed and looked away. His body responded involuntarily and he cursed himself for it and lifted over the blanket covering her from view.

Draco sat next to her for a moment afraid to touch her, even covered.

She looked a little like a fallen angel: dirty and ragged and…beautiful.

 _If you are an Angel are you here to save me or damn me?_

Draco lay down next to her; the sheer exhaustion from the day finally taking hold of him.

He watched her breathing, slow and even for a moment.

 _She'll be fine,_ he told himself.

His eyes grew heavy and soon sleep swept him away.

* * *

A few hours later Draco woke to the knock at his door, lifting his head away from the pillow.

"Draco," his mother's voice called. "Dinner."

He looked at the sleeping witch next to him. Her features had softened in sleep.

He debated waking her. He couldn't have her wandering around his room snooping through things. He couldn't risk her escape, as much as a part of him wanted to just leave her to her own devices. He wasn't about to take her back down to the cellar-regardless of whether Greyback was gone or not he didn't want to walk down there... Didn't want to remember what he had seen and what could have happened.

Draco rolled out of the bed and reached for his wand.

Granger stirred at the movement of the bed. A frown appeared on her face.

Draco reached out and traced the crease of tension forming in her brow as she seemed to be fighting to return to consciousness.

"Shhhh," he whispered and stroked her hair. "You're safe here."

 _For the moment at least._

"Harry…" she murmured her friend's names and Draco drew his hand back as if burned. "Ron?"

Draco ground his teeth together and pulled out his wand.

 _Of course she would call out for them..._

He cast a sleep spell leaving without waiting to see if it worked.

Before the spell took hold and softly enough that Draco did not hear it, Hermione breathed out one more name before succumbing to the blackness:

"Draco…"

* * *

 **That's all folks. I hope you enjoyed this updated version. If you did please be sure and let me know with a review-it really does make my day. Cheers.**


	7. Chapter 5: The Wardrobe

T **hank you to the original reviewers for this chapter** kitkat2150, EndlessReign, Ddee, Scorpia11 and Rihannablis. **and everyone who has taken the time to comment since. You are all appreciated.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 5: The Wardrobe

Draco's stride did not falter when he saw Snape sitting opposite his father at the dinner table.

It was uncommon for Snape to stop by without business, which meant there was some news...or maybe Snape wanted to hear first-hand about yesterday's events. His mother's friends were there as well, the pureblood women who Draco had seen many times before. Apparently the days earlier hiccup hadn't been a big enough issue for Narcissa to cancel or postpone anything.

 _That's because cancelling would mean having to admit that something was wrong,_ thought Draco unhappily.

Draco sat down and noticed that the women were looking at Bellatrix with some concern.

Draco didn't blame them, if anything yesterday's events and the fact that on top of everything she had cursed the wound she had carved into Hermione, made Draco feel even more wary of his aunt.

Bellatrix however didn't seem all that interested in the guests. She was entirely focused on talking with Snape. Or rather, she was talking _at_ Snape who appeared to be sitting even more rigidly than usual.

The new headmasters eyes flickered to Draco and Draco shifted uneasily.

Why wasn't the professor at school? Surely Hogwarts needed their headmaster.

 _It's not the same school you loved,_ he reminded himself.

 _Now its run by tyrants who teach the cruciatus curse by practicing on first years._

 _You cast that on Granger less than twenty four hours ago, who the hell are you to judge._

Draco pushed that thought down and focused on the dinner itself. He remained mostly silent and found the food was not so tasteless at it had seemed at his last meal. He tried to ignore the fact that it was likely due to Granger being on his room rather than the cellar.

"...And it was Draco who had the wherewithal to suggest we use the little Mudblood as bait," he aunt said smiling proudly at him pulling Draco away from his thoughts.

Draco forced a smile back worried that it might look more like a grimace than a smile.

"The dark Lord put him in charge of her," said Bellatrix "Shame about the whole Binding bit, but it will keep it so she can never run away," Bellatrix clapped happily and giggled. The two women shifted nervously at her manic nature.

"It's an honor," squeaked Lucius and then coughed, clearing his throat. "It is an honor which requires sacrifice."

"But only temporary," said Bellatrix in a scolding tone to Lucius. "We can do away with the bind as soon as we have Potter."

 _Like hell you will!_ Draco growled mentally at his aunt.

Doing away with the bind meant killing Granger and he wasn't going to let that happen.

Something about seeing her and saving her in the cellar had solidified the need to keep her alive in his mind. He wasn't going to let anyone touch her-not if he could help it.

Not ever.

Snape seemed to sense his thoughts and Draco shot the headmaster a glare.

 _Back off._

Dinner continued without further issue and the conversation turned to flower arrangements and remained on similar frivolities for the duration of the meal.

When all was said and done Draco excused himself from the table and walked towards his room.

"So you finally get to have you vengeance on the witch who bested you," Snape's voice came at Draco from the shadows and he stepped out into the light as Draco turned to face his teacher and mentor.

"So?" Draco shot.

"Where is she?" asked Snape. "I looked for her in the cellar and found it decidedly..." he paused in his usual manner, "empty."

"Why do you care _?" you need to keep face_ , Draco reminded himself, _this is Voldemort's right hand, you cannot show that you care._

"Because she is the cleverest witch of her age...Mudblood or not," Snape came closer. "Where is she?"

"She's in my room."

An emotion Draco didn't recognize flirted across Snape's face too fast to be deciphered.

"I would be careful how you tread Mr. Malfoy." There was an obvious threat in Snape's voice.

"Don't worry," Draco sneered. "She's safe from escape." _and from you and anyone else._

"That isn't my concern..." Snape said and then straightened. "You would do well to make sure she seems worth rescuing to her friends."

"She would be worth rescuing to them even if she only has one breath left," answered Draco.

"True, but think about what they would do to the one who put her in that state?" asked Snape raising a brow.

"Why do you care? The Dark Lord is supposed to win anyhow which would mean that shouldn't matter."

Snape snapped a hand forward and Draco flinched back his back hitting the wall as Snape came far too close for comfort cornering him against the stone.

"In case it escaped your memory. I made an unbreakable vow to your mother to protect you. You would do well to help me keep that vow," said Snape.

 _Self-preservation_ , Draco sneered. Of course that was what this was about.

 _You're no better_ , his inner voice reminded him darkly.

"Well you can relax," Draco answered shoving Snape's arm off him and slipping away from the wall. "I know what I'm doing."

Draco hurried up the stairs to his room and burst in slamming the door behind him.

* * *

The anxiety Draco had kept at bay the last few hours over dinner came crushing in.

He needed out; Needed to escape.

 _Please Merlin let my new wand work,_ he drew his wand and walked over to his wardrobe.

He closed his eyes for a moment, just breathing, afraid to try in case it failed. Draco slid his hands over the wooden surface.

 _I can't fail, I need it...I need to escape._

He raised his wand and uttered the incantation.

There was a loud clunk, like a safe unlocking and when Draco opened the large wooden door of his wardrobe a sweet sea breeze greeted him brushing up against his face like a lover's caress.

Draco trembled with relief and inhaling deeply.

 _It worked, thank Merlin._

He moved to step inside and glanced back over his shoulder at Granger sleeping peacefully on the bed.

 _She'll be fine Draco, she made it through dinner without you,_ he told himself.

He turned back to the wardrobe and stepped inside closing and locking it behind him.

Inside the wardrobe was a sturdy wooden dock, smooth and pale under the light of the moon. Draco looked out at the night sky. It was speckled with stars and planets larger and brighter than in the real world. He had made them each himself. They reminded him, on some level, of childhood days and the time when he was carefree and the universe was big and beautiful. He let their light shine down on him and basked in the tranquility of his wardrobe oasis.

The island he had missed so much was not far away. Only a small stretch of about a hundred meter separated the dock and the door from the island oasis he had created as his own personal escape.

Reaching down Draco slipped off his dress shoes and then quickly rid himself of all his clothes, save for his black boxers, and dove in deep.

The water swallowed him refreshingly cool but not cold. It was, as always, a perfect contrast to the warm air.

The slight sting of the salt reminded him that the wound by his eye was not quite closed yet.

When he surface her let out a sigh and began swimming with strong pulls taking him forward, keeping his head above water-not wanting to irritate the cut further.

 _At least the salt will keep it clean,_ he thought to himself.

When he was a few feet away from the island his feet bumped shallows. He stood and waded the rest of the way out on to the sandy beach. A towel was waiting for him in its usual place on top of a large boulder on the edge of the island. He scooped it up and dried off his hair, not bothering with the rest. He tossed the towel back onto the rock and made his way past the twin palm trees and hammock over to the little round hut.

Much like the wardrobe the hut was not what it appeared from the outside.

On the surface it looked like a simple grass hut with a dried palm roof, inside...there was a hardwood floor polished to an almost glass-like shine that only magic could achieve. The walls on every side were lined with books floor to ceiling, and there was a fire place which crackled for ambiance but provided no real heat. The island was quite warm on its own and a fireplace wasn't needed for practical reasons, only for visual comfort.

There was a big couch facing the fire. It was poofy and black and soft.

 _This is where I want to be,_ thought Draco his shoulders relaxing.

Draco picked up a book from the shelf and fell into the couch with a sigh.

He waved his hands and a lamp flickered to life shedding plenty for him to read by.

Time passed slowly here.

A small chime rang once an hour from the moment of his arrival to remind him of time, and that the outside world was a place he had to return to at some point.

When he had first made the pocket oasis in the wardrobe he hadn't bothered with a chime or any other means of telling time. That oversight had led to his mother and father thinking he had run away, which had not ended well.

He had been only fifteen at the time and had been gone for over nine hours...it was one of the only times that his father had punished him in front of his mother.

After that incident and the subsequent punishment Draco had added the hourly chimes so be safe. He had also added in an alarm that rang if anyone tried to come into his bedroom while he was in the wardrobe. It caused the door to stick for several seconds giving him a window to return without getting caught.

He had been keeping this space a secret for years and as time passed he added more and more measures to keep to keep it safe because each passing year he found he needed it more and the idea of loosing it was now unthinkable.

He was immeasurably thankful that the wardrobe had responded to his new wand.

Starting a place like this from scratch would take weeks of work and he knew it would never be quite the same.

This place was his place, anything else would just be an imitation.

Draco stayed in the wardrobe for several hours, reading and sipping on wine from his bar, before he reluctantly swam back to the dock at the entrance and redressed.

He slipped quietly out of the wardrobe and waved his wand locking it once more.

Just to be sure he reopened the heavy door to check that the spell had worked. Sure enough the sanctuary within had been replaced by his dress suits. He let out a sigh of relief and turned to face his room and the witch on his bed.

He stood next to Granger for a moment before removing the sleep spell.

She squirmed once then opened her eyes blinking twice.

"Draco?" she looked around and he watched the tension reawaken in her. She wrapped her arms around herself in a hug. "Where am I?"

"You are in my room," he answered simply.

She trembled visibly.

"Why am I here? Why am I on your bed?" she scrambled off the bed throwing off the covers. She shimmied away, her back against the wall knocking his bedside table as she grasped at her torn shirt clutching it tightly to her chest.

"Granger," Draco reached for her.

"Don't touch me!" she almost screeched.

Draco recoiled and saw the struggle cross her face.

 _I told you I wouldn't hurt you_ , he wanted to tell her.

 _After what almost happened...can you really blame her for being...upset._

"I'm sorry," she said, clearly reading his face.

She slid down the wall clutching her knees to her chest she held herself in a tight ball.

"I'm sorry," she repeated. "I know...I know you...you saved me." she looked up at him and blinked as if seeing him standing there for the first time. "Thank you Draco."

His first name coming from her lips in that gentle tone was a completely foreign sound to him.

Her voice held none of its usual anger or malice. It made him want to hold her and filled him with the desire to run from her at the same time. He felt a flush rush through his body.

Draco wanted to tell her that he would protect her, but that desire quickly dissipated as memories of when he had left her for dinner replayed themselves in his head.

She had called out her friend's name. She had called out for Potter and Ron…the Weasel. He would never be someone that she called out for...and if she did...well that could get her killed here.

Draco's lips pressed closed in a thin line allowing no promise of protection to slip past.

 _Tell her that you only saved her because she's your property now, and you didn't want her damaged._

It would probably be the smartest thing to say to keep her believing he didn't care. It would hurt her though.

He couldn't bring himself to say it and his anger dissipated while she looked at him with open eyes and thanked him for saving her from something no woman should ever have to endure.

He swallowed.

 _So what do I do now?_

Draco wracked his brain. What would make her feel better?

"Come," he said. "You need to get cleaned up." He held his hand out to her to help her up.

She hesitated for a moment and then placed her hand in his and he helped her stand before letting go.

Draco turned and led her into his bathroom. He went through the motions of showing her how things worked ,waving his hand for the shower and showing her where the towels were.

"Promise me you won't try to escape tonight," said Draco.

He knew he couldn't ask her not to try ever, but he wanted one night where he didn't have to worry about her.

Granger hesitated.

"Look, I'm only asking for tonight," he snapped. "I want to get a good night sleep without having to worry. It's the least you can give me after-"

"Alright," she cut him off.

Draco's face gave away his surprise that she had agreed.

"Good," he nodded, if she promised she would keep that promise. She was honest like that.

 _You should leave her alone, you know you can trust her to stay and she probably needs some time..._

"Then I can leave you alone in here."

With that Draco turned and left.

* * *

Hermione looked around the bathroom.

It was a beautiful room, gilded and fit for a mansion.

She was surprised and thankful that Malfoy had left her alone.

If she hadn't promised him not to try and escape she doubted she would have been afforded the courtesy of privacy.

 _First he saves you from death and Greyback claiming you , then he saves you from the cellar and Greyback trying to rape you._

Flashback's from the cellar hit Hermione in waves.

 _Don't think about it,_ she tried to tell herself.

Hermione waved her hand and the waterfall shower began to flow.

She looked in the mirror and saw the bruise on her face. It wasn't near as bad as she had expected it to be.

Greyback's face appeared in her mind and she jumped back form the mirror.

Despite having just woken up she felt exhausted; Totally and utterly spent from everything she had been put through.

She striped off her torn shirt and threw it in the waste basket, not sure what she would wear afterwards, but knowing she wouldn't…couldn't wear it again even if Draco was kind enough to mend it.

 _Kind enough_ …She shook her head. He was a Malfoy, he wasn't kind, he was cunning. There had to be an ulterior motive behind his actions.

 _But he saved you._

She shook her head trying to shake out the images of the cellar from her thoughts. She found she couldn't and she lashed out with a cry punching the wall.

"Fuck!" she yelled and grabbed hold of her now throbbing knuckles.

She looked to the door. Seconds passed and nothing happened. Hermione realized he wasn't going to just burst in on her. She really did have the room to herself. She looked at the window.

 _I could just go..._

 _How high up is it?_

She went to the window as the room filled with steam and opened it looking down.

 _Three stories, she said to herself. You might make it.._

 _Or you might break an ankle._

It was a decision for another time if she couldn't find a better way. She had promised not tonight and he was right, she owed him at least that much. Regardless of his motivations he had saved her.

 _You owe Draco your life..._

 _Why did he save me?_

Hermione went back to the shower and stepped under the spray and moaned.

It had been weeks since she had, had a real shower.

Before being captured they had been in hiding without running water. True she had had water and magic and had kept clean but this was something different, after so long it felt like an absolute luxury. She tilted her head back and let the water flow over her.

It felt good to wash away the day.

She wished she could wash away the memories along with the dirt.

When she had finished she wrapped a towel around herself and went back out to the bedroom.

Draco turned to face her as she entered the room and froze.

Hermione saw his shock and then she saw something else in his eyes. Something that scared her. His eyes raked her body and he looked away.

She saw his hands fist.

He went over to his dresser and yanked the drawer open abruptly, his movements sharp. He grabbed a set of pajama pants and then opened another drawer and pulled out a shirt.

"Get dressed," he ordered tossing them both at her.

He sounded mad and Hermione shrank at his tone.

 _Why is he suddenly so mad?_ she wondered. What had changed? His anger felt sharp against her skin.

 _You're just being sensitive, don't overthink it._

Hermione slipped back into the washroom and pulled on the cloths quickly. The pants were soft and cozy and much to long for her. The shirt fit…possibly a little too well. She was happy for her bra. Usually she would never wear it to bed; here it felt like an extra layer of protection.

She stopped, her hand on the doorknob.

 _I don't want to go back there, not back to the cellar,_ she thought. The idea of going back down there filled her with dread.

Where was she going to sleep?

Hermione went back into the room to find Draco pacing.

He sized her up once more this time his face was a mask-giving away nothing except a general air of anger.

 _What is going on?_ She wondered. _What changed his demeanor so quickly? What did I do?_

"I don't want to go back to the cellar," she blurted.

Her words stopped Draco's pacing.

"I'm not sending you back down there," said Draco with a scowl.

"Then… where am I going to sleep?"

Draco paused seeming to debate something before answering.

"Here," he said. "You're going to sleep here…with me."

* * *

 **Authors note: Yes, Draco has an island in his wardrobe. In the same way that Ron's family has a tent that has multiple rooms and Newt has several different climates and regions in his suitcase. It is Draco's escape and safe place that he created for himself ( in my world and story) to hide away from the horrors he has to deal with because of his families connection to the return of the dark Lord. I hope people enjoyed that idea, I tried to be a little more clear in my descriptions in this updated version of the chapter  
**

 **Thanks for reading, please leave a review and let me know what you thought. Cheers.**


	8. Chapter 6: The Sleeping Arrangements

**Big thank you to the original reviewers for this chapter** : addictedtoloveandfiction, Scorpia11, EndlessReign, Greenti, AnayaR, Coyote's Shadow , elle311 **and the guest** "Amaira" **as well as to everyone who has taken the time to review since. I appreciate it very much.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 6: The Sleeping Arrangements

What?!" Hermione stood shell shocked. Her face lost so much colour that Draco couldn't help but take a little offense.

"Not like that Granger. Get your mind out of the gutter," he recovered quickly hiding his hurt at her reaction behind a biting tone. "You're going to sleep here next to me so I can keep my eye on you," he retorted.

"You can't keep an eye on someone while you are sleeping! And I am NOT sleeping next to you," she argued.

Draco could see the colour returning to her face turning her cheeks pink. It made her look cute.

Too cute.

She was wearing his clothes and they looked so good on her…Too good on her.

His shirt was tight enough on her that it was making the pants HE was wearing feel tight. As for how she looked in his his pants… well, she hadn't turned around but he had a feeling that they fit her better around back quite well. He could see the material drawn tight around her hips-which were larger than his- while pooling around the ankles since she was so much shorter than him.

 _Merlin she looks sexy._

 _What the fuck Malfoy, this is Granger._

 _You're staring too long, you need to make her believe this is no big deal._

"Don't be a twat," he said unable to keep a little of the frustration out of his voice.

"Excuse me?" Her cheeks flamed. He could practically see the steam rising out of her ears.

 _Good, it's good to see her feisty and fighting. Better than seeing her sad and broken._

"You heard me. It's a king sized bed Granger," Draco continued. "Unless you are the queen of star-fishing, we can go the whole night without touching each other." He tilted his head and raised an eyebrow. "Unless you're worried, you'll lose control and be unable to resist me," he gave a wolfish grin.

"Never," the venom in her voice hurt more than he liked which spurned the next words

"Then your safe," said Draco. "Because I wouldn't touch a m-" he cut himself off, but it was too late. The damage was already done. He could see in her eyes that she knew what he was going to call her. Her hand went to the scar on her arm and her eyes filled with tears which she refused to let fall. Guilt ate at the pit of his stomach.

 _You almost called her that name…_

 _Its better this way, you can't let her know you care. Its better she hates you._

 _But I don't want her to hate me,_ the realization that he didn't want her to hate him hit Draco hard.

 _She's been here two days and already she's fucking with your head._

"I-" he started.

"Don't Malfoy," Granger cut him off.

He had never apologized to her for real, not for all the things that he had said and done. The words of the apology she deserved died on his tongue as she cut him off.

 _Don't be an idiot, you can't apologize to her._

"Fine," he straightened. "You still don't have a choice on where you lay your head tonight. You are stuck here with me whether you like it or not."

"Well I don't."

"You've made that abundantly clear," he said flatly.

A silence hung between them.

"I'm not sharing a bed with you. I'll sleep on the floor."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"What's so ridiculous about it? I slept on the floor in the cellar," she said pointedly.

"Why are you being so difficult Granger?" he crossed his arms over his chest with a scowl.

"Difficult!" she exclaimed.

"Yes, difficult-that is what I said," Draco folded his arms over his chest.

"You, you!" Hermione let out a frustrated growl.

"If we have left logic and words behind then I'm afraid I'm done arguing with you tonight," said Draco feeling fed up.

"You can't just bully me into sharing a bed with you!"

"You **_can_** go back to the cellar if you like," Shot Draco, though he had no intent of following through on that threat.

"You bastard," she said lowly.

"Enough." Draco's voice took on a warning edge and Hermione seemed to catch the shift in his tone.

He could see the debate in her face. She wanted to keep fighting him tooth and nail. He didn't doubt that it probably gave her a feeling of some semblance of normalcy to lock horns with him. He realized that even though she didn't like him and even after what he had done cursing her in front of his aunt...she still wasn't afraid of him. Something in him softened at that knowledge.

 _She probably doesn't even realize it herself, doesn't realize she's not afraid of you._

"I'm sleeping on the floor," Granger repeated and sat down where she stood.

Draco let out a frustrated growl.

"I'm not having you sleep on the floor Granger."

"It's not like I wasn't on the floor for the last two nights. I'll manage just fine here, thank you. At least your floor has a carpet."

"Granger," Draco went over to her and raised his wand. To her credit she didn't flinch much.

He waved the wand and lifted her off the ground. She struggled against the spell.

"You ass!"

"I told you I was done arguing," he responded dismissively and lay her down on the bed. He waved his wand again and soft ties appeared around her ankles knees and wrists.

"Are you shitting me?" she looked down and started wriggling trying to get out of them.

And damn if it wasn't one of the sexist things he had ever seen.

 _You're playing with fire again Draco._

This was an arguably more dangerous fire than getting on Greyback's bad side. He could not afford to develop feelings for Granger.

 _I don't care, I'm not letting her sleep on the hard floor all night while I sleep in a comfortable bed._

Draco cast a barrier on the edge of her side of the bed.

"So you don't roll off in the middle of the night and hurt yourself," he explained.

Granger raised an eyebrow at him.

"I'm allowed to not want to have to wake up in the middle of the night to a thud and you howling about banging an elbow off my floor, for not having hands free to catch yourself."

She didn't say anything, but gave him a look.

Her silence was infuriating.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," she answered shortly and looked away.

"Whatever," Draco climbed into bed beside her on his knees careful to keep his distance and remain on his half of the bed. He was too tired to deal with an argument at the moment. "Remember you promised not to try and run away," he said plucking up several pillows and creating a puffy wall between them.

Granger looked at the pillows and then at Draco.

"Remember?" he prompted.

"I do," she finally snapped. "Unlike some people I keep my promises."

"You've never seen me make a promise Granger so get off your damn high horse," Draco growled.

 _See what she thinks of you?_

"Oh are you trying to tell me that the great Draco Malfoy is a man of his word. Forgive me if I find that hard to believe."

"Granger if you don't shut up I'm going to gag you," his tone made it very clear that he had every intention of following through with the threat if she kept pushing him.

Silence answered him.

"That's better."

Draco sighed and pulled his shirt up over his head. He heard a sharp intake of breath and looked down at Granger who was looking at him, or rather staring at his torso. Her eyes flickered to his face and he saw a combination of fear and if he wasn't mistaken a glimmer of appreciation.

 _Did little miss prim and proper Hermione Granger check me out?_ A small part of Draco smiled.

It soothed something in Draco to know that he wasn't the only one being distracted by what he saw.

"Go to sleep Granger," he said much softer. "I promise you're safe here tonight."

She didn't say anything and Draco presumed she was choosing to remain silent due to his threat.

He turned off the light and crawled in bed. When he his head down on the pillow she spoke.

"Promise?" he voice was so soft he almost didn't catch it. It was almost like the vulnerable request of a small child, afraid of the monsters underneath their bed. Draco's chest squeezed tight with emotion.

 _Give her this, promise her so she can get some rest._

"I promise," he answered softly and then fell asleep.

* * *

Hermione lay there on her side of the bed staring up at embroidered canopy.

She missed Harry and Ron and couldn't stop thinking about them.

Were her friends okay? She thought about the order and about being rescued.

What if they did succeed in rescuing her? What would happen with Malfoy then?

She looked across the bed. He looked so peaceful, his face smooth and relaxed in sleep.

She hated him.

 _It doesn't matter what happens to him, he's a bully. He bullied you into sharing this bed with him._

 _And promised you that you were safe._

 _And you believe him?_ the cynical side demanded.

She did.

Hermione didn't know why but she believed Draco when he had promised she would be safe here tonight.

 _He still was an ass about it._

She turned away and back to the ceiling.

She hated to admit it even to herself, but the truth was she also cared a little what happened to him.

He had saved her life. It wasn't ideal, but what about this world and this war was ideal? Nothing, the world she was in was hell. Still, Draco didn't deserve to rot forever in Azkaban.

 _Maybe a little while there wouldn't hurt_ , she thought begrudgingly then hated herself for being so dark.

 _He tortured you with the crutiatus he deserves to be punished._

 _He saved you today._

the war in her head was exacerbated by what had happened in the cellar. She felt vulnerable and raw. The 'Almost' was terrifying.

Hermione looked back at his sleeping face. He was so much more handsome when he wasn't scowling. Hermione scrunched up her face.

 _You are not going to think about Draco Malfoy that way no matter how surprisingly good her looks shirtless-He is evil_

 _He's not entirely evil._

 _I'm going crazy_ , Hermione thought to herself. _I would never think like this if I wasn't here as a captive, being used as bait. Look at yourself, he tied you up._ That ended any fondness in her thoughts squashing them out completely.

 _Evil or not he is the enemy. You need to figure out a way to escape._

With that Hermione began plotting a way out. She began her plans and fell asleep thinking of being with her friends once more.

* * *

She had succeeded.

Her plan had worked.

Across the glen she saw the camp with all her friends. Scattered tents of the rebellion sitting like little clouds in a green grass sky.

Her best friend in the world stood looking off into the distance, slightly apart from the rest of the crowd.

"Harry!" she yelled running to him.

Harry's head jerked towards her and the second recognition set in his face lit up with a smile.

She was safe, she was back, everything was going to be okay.

"Hermione!" Harry ran towards her and she met his open arms leaping into them.

"How did you escape?" he asked pulling back.

"I had to wait until the right moment. I got a wand and then I took my chance," she answered and hugged him again.

"That's fantastic," he said into her hair. "We were trying to figure out how to get to you."

"I know you were. I knew you would try," she mumbled into his shoulder.

"MIONE!" Hermione lifted her head from Harry's shoulder as Ron came running out to her and picked her up spinning her around. "Boy am I glad to see you."

"I should hope so," she teased.

"Bloody hell, how did you manage it?" asked Ron.

"I..." she paused, her mind wasn't working clearly. How had she managed it?

She told Harry she had waited for the right moment...but what had that moment been?

"Thank you Ms. Granger," Voldemort's voice came from behind them. "For leading us right to Mr. Potter."

Hermione turned to see a wall of death eaters. Draco was standing with his family by the dark Lord.

"How could you?" she felt…betrayed.

"He knows where his loyalty lies," Said Voldemort putting his arm around Draco who smiled wickedly at her.

"What's the matter Mudblood. Did you think I cared?" he laughed. "Brightest witch of the age. Right! You're the one who thought running right to your friends was the smart thing to do when you knew the Bind would let me follow you wherever you went. It's your fault."

"You did this?" Ron demanded angrily.

"I didn't mean to," Hermione pleaded feeling a sinking sensation in her stomach.

"How could you Hermione?" asked Harry, his face full of pain at her betrayal.

"I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"This is your fault," said Ron.

Suddenly Harry was lying dead at her feet, his skin pale and waxy.

The bodies of all of her friends lay scattered around her, broken and bloody.

"It's your fault," came a voice in Hermione's ear from behind.

Dread knotted in the pit of her stomach.

She turned to see Greyback smiling face.

"No," she breathed in horror.

Greyback knocked her down to the ground.

Her head rolled to the side and she saw Harry's face beside her; Eyes open but vacant.

"No," she started crying. Greyback came down on top of her pinning her arms in his hands.

"You're mine now little witch."

"No!"

* * *

"GRANGER wake up!" Draco shook her awake and Hermione took one look at him and shoved her unbound hand into his face connecting sharply with his nose. He let out a yell and clutched his face as she scrambled over running to the bathroom.

"Granger!" Draco ran after her, one hand holding his bloody nose.

He stopped short when he saw her throwing up into the toilet.

She didn't have much on her stomach since she hadn't eaten since the roll he had brought her the previous morning so all that came up was bile.

Draco stood frozen with indecision for several heartbeats before the anger left him in a swift breath and he knelt next to her and held her hair back from her face with his free hand.

She trembled at his touch, but didn't push him away.

After several moments she stopped being sick and pulled away from him leaning against the wall beside the toilet.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

The concern in his voice killed her as she thought of the dream.

 _This is nothing but a game for him. You were stupid to think otherwise._

She didn't answer him, just looked away.

She expected his wrath... Expected him to push her; to yell at her for hitting him. Instead, he stood and went to the sink filling the empty glass beside the faucet he brought it back to her and handed her the water.

She wanted to reject it, but the taste of bile in her mouth overrode the desire to push him away. She took the cup gingerly from his hands and drank down several gulps. the water was cool and crisp and refreshing on her raw throat. She hadn't realized just how thirsty she was.

Draco moved over to the mirror and washed his face. He examined his nose. It wasn't broken, just slightly bloody.

She watched as pulled out his wand and cast a quick spell and fixed his nose, then waved it again cleaning up the mess.

"Why don't you fix your eye?" asked Hermione.

She watched his posture stiffen and wondered what was going on.

"Dark Lords orders," he answered refusing to look at her.

"Why would he do that?" she asked.

"Why do you think?" he snapped, turning to face her. His voice had a strange quality to it.

"I don't know..."she managed.

"He wanted to fuck with me, to make a point and make sure that the wound, that my face scarred.. To make sure I never forget that I let Potter go and failed him." Draco sneered. "Bet you're happy about that. Happy to see a Malfoy hurt, scarred-in pain. Think I deserve it don't you?!" He was yelling and Hermione shivered.

"No..." she whispered. _You don't._

"What?" He yelled. "Speak up Granger!"

"Yes!" she yelled back, refusing to repeat a truth that a part of her didn't feel like he deserved it. "Yes. I think you deserve it you selfish prat!" Her voice rose and she let her anger at her circumstance lash out at him. "You deserve it and so does your whole family. I hope you all rot in Azkaban for the rest of your lives!"

She didn't expect the spell. The silencio hit her hard sending her crashing back against the wall.

Her head connected with a sharp thwack against the wall and her eyes rolled.

When she looked back Draco was backing away in horror.

He didn't wait for her to say anything, just turned and left leaving her alone in the bathroom.

* * *

Draco couldn't believe what he had done.

He had hurt her.

 _You didn't mean to, it was just a silencio._

 _It doesn't matter._

He had hurt her, not for show, and not to protect her, but because he had lost his temper

Yes, it was only a silencio, it wasn't meant to hurt only silence her. Still, he had seen her head hit the wall.

He had hurt her, accident or not it was his doing.

He had proved her right.

He deserved whatever punishment came his way.

 _You hurt her..._

He heard the soft steps of Granger coming back into his bedroom and dared to cast a glance her way.

She moved slowly towards the bed without raising her head. He was surprised when she climbed in carefully and lay down on her side of the pillows.

He wasn't surprised when she turned onto her side to face away from him.

He wanted to reach out to her and apologize.

He wanted to tell her he didn't mean it.

He wanted to hear her say she understood and that she forgave him.

Once again he couldn't do what he wanted, only this time it was because he couldn't find the words.

Draco took a deep breath and, with a dark feeling of resignation, crawled into bed beside her and fell into a brief and restless sleep.

* * *

 **AUTHORS NOTE: I want to make it very clear dear readers that Draco did not attack Hermione here. She has hit him several times and he has held back his temper. Directly after her giving him a bloody nose he is patient with her. It isn't until she is lashing out cruelly at him that he casts a spell which is not intended to harm her just to stop her from saying such hurtful things. My version of Draco is not perfect, but he is not abusive-it was genuinely an accident.**

 **Thanks so much for reading please review and let me know what you think.**


	9. Chapter 7: The Notes

**Big thank you to the original reviewers for this chapter** Starearth, Ayr , samurai-girl8, , Langas, Aid4 , Wolfling72 , aniani123, Rebbs22, Greenti, **and the guests** "Amaira", "harrypotterfan", "DramioneDestiny **"** **and the other people who have take the time since to review.**

 **This chapter is Dedicated to:** EndlessReign **for the continued support and for the reviews. You rock.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 7: The Notes

Draco rose long before first light. He had not slept well and so when he woke for the fifth time in the same evening he knew there was no point in going back to sleep.

Hermione was still sleeping, unbound, next to him in the bed.

She was still turned away from him, her breathing even and slow.

 _At least one of us got a good nights sleep,_ he thought to himself.

Careful not to disturb her Draco crawled out of bed. He cast a quick charm to keep her sleeping for the time being. He wanted to be able to move around and go about his business as usual without worrying about waking her up. She deserved to rest, especially after everything last night.

Draco went to his washroom and showered going through the motions.

When he was finished he looked at his reflection in the mirror.

His eye was healing well, the wound had closed and was scabbed over in an ugly red and brown line, but it didn't look infected or inflamed.

 _Well, that's one good thing at least._

Draco took a deep breath.

Last night had been a disaster. He had simultaneously come too close to showing her that he cared and pushed her further away.

His knuckles whitened on the sinks edge.

 _You need to keep your distance, it's the best and most effective way to deal with this,_ he told himself and went back out into his room.

He looked at Granger's sleeping form.

 _You can't make her share a bed with you._

He knew he _could_ technically make her, but he shouldn't. It was what he had done last night though…suddenly that thought made his skin crawl.

He had made her do something she didn't want to selfishly- because he was worried she wouldn't keep her word and would try and escape and because he didn't like the idea of a girl sleeping on the floor while he slept on a big comfy bed.

 _You suck at being chivalrous, think about how she felt about it. You trapped her. It's probably your fault she had the nightmare._

 _I was trying to do the right thing._

 _Well you suck at that too. Don't try and be the good guy, don't try to be something you're not. You will never be the hero._

Draco turned away from the mirror. He covered his face with his hands and tried not to see the look in her eyes from last night.

 _She has every right to hate you,_ he told himself, even though the idea of her hate made him feel a strange and unpleasant ache in his chest.

He was past asking himself why he cared and had accepted that he did care.

 _You shouldn't..._

 _Well I do._

Draco made his way back into his room and moved around to the side of the bed Granger was sleeping on.

He looked at her face, so peaceful now.

She had crawled back in bed without being restrained after the nightmare.

He wondered if it was because she had become afraid of him. He hated that thought. He didn't want to see fear in her eyes while looking or thinking of him. Hadn't he, just last night, taken comfort in the knowledge that she wasn't…or at least hadn't, been afraid of him?  
 _Yeah and you probably ruined that._

Draco ran a hand through his hair.

 _One thing at a time Draco,_ he told himself, _solve one problem at a time. Be resourceful._

What was the first problem he should tackle?

 _Well she clearly doesn't want to share a bed with you so why don't you start by fixing that problem._

Draco went to his shelf and pulled out a spell book, searching for an old spell he remembered reading years ago.

He found it quickly and glanced over it again before returning to his bed. He plucked a feather from his pillow and with his wand lifted it into the air. The feather grew and changed. It settled on the ground between his feet and the bed, transforming into a very cozy looking pallet.

 _Perfect,_ he thought, feeling very satisfied with his creation.

With a wave of his wand Draco dispelled the barrier he had created and levitated Granger from her place on his bed to the pallet on the floor.

He went to his closet and pulled out a second set of blankets and covered her gently, tucking her in.

 _There_ , he thought, _your own bed Granger. Better than the floor and better than suffering through sleeping next to your enemy._

He sighed. He still had to do something to prevent her from running away.

He sifted through his memories for the last time he had needed to keep something from escaping and his memory drifted back to a spell her had used as a tether years ago to keep a rabbit from escaping while he tried to practice spells to change and animals colour.

His rabbit, named-tragically-Hasenpfeffer, had made its way through several shades of the rainbow until one day one of the family's owls had swooped in through the open window for a snack.

Draco had been devastated. His father had yelled at him for crying over something so trivial. The memory made Draco rub unconsciously at the dull ache in his chest.

He mumbled to himself and tried to recall the spell word for word.

It only took a moment, as his memory was both pleasantly and, at times unfortunately, quite good.

He remembered everything he needed to for class with very few notes; he also remembered the horrors of his life in vivid colour.

Draco shook his head and lifted his wand. As he began chanting a light silver thread drifted down from the tip of his wand in the form of a delicate luminescent chain which tied itself gently around Hermione's ankle.

He walked around the room figuring out just how much of a length was needed for her to make it to the bathroom and back while still being short enough to keep her from the door to his room. When he had figured out the length he tied off the spell to the big oak bed frame and left.

The house was silent. No one was awake yet and Draco was thankful for that fact. He really didn't want anyone up and about to see what he was about to do.

He had noticed last night when Granger was sick in the washroom that nothing much was coming up and it had dawned on him that she was, or rather had been, practically starved.

The guilt at that realization drove his next actions.

He made his way into the kitchen and with a wave of his wand began cooking.

Draco Malfoy was not a chef and had very little practice making much of anything except breakfast.

Girls were always impressed by breakfast the morning after and the romance of breakfast in bed-so that was one spell he knew for food in so, very, very many iterations.

His movements were precise yet hurried. He needed to finish before anyone else woke and saw that he was giving her more than bread and water. He had snuck Luna food many times during her stay, but that was different in his families eyes. Luna was a pureblood witch and the only reason why she had been held captive was to convince her father to help Voldemort.

He remembered how sweet she had been to him when he brought her food, instead of lashing out angrily she had simply said 'thank you'

It had made Draco angry how she had just...stayed so...damn sweet.

 _She remained above it all,_ he thought.

 _Yeah that's because her head lives in the clouds._

 _Loony-Lovegood,_ Draco felt bad for thinking of the nic-name.

Well she is Loony, he thought back.

Draco shook his head and focused on making breakfast. As soon as he was done cooking Draco hurried up the stairs and back into his room.

The light of morning was beginning to make its way through the window and Draco set the food down on his table by the window casting an enchantment on it to keep it warm for her.

He went to leave and then paused. What if she thought the food was for him? She might think that she would be punished for touching his food. He didn't want her starving thinking that what she wanted was forbidden to her. That would just be...cruel.

And he didn't want to be cruel to her, not now.

Saving her...

Saving her had changed things.

Draco picked up a scrap of paper to write and tell her the food was intended for her consumption.

 ** _Granger, I'm sorry for last night..._**

 _You can't write that you twat, what if someone else sees it? What if she thinks you've gone soft and trusts you too much and gets you both killed?_

He crumpled up the paper and tossed it away into the basket.

 ** _Granger, you need to eat. Keep up your strength. It's not poisoned I promise_** _._

He let out a grunt and crumpled up the second piece.

 _That just makes you sound like an idiot Draco, good job._ He penned another line:

 ** _I made you breakfast_**

That piece he crumpled it immediately. He couldn't tell her that either. If anyone knew he was cooking for her and treating her nicely…it wouldn't end well.

He stood staring at the fourth sheet of paper for several long moments until he heard her stirring as the spell for sleep began to wear off. Finally he gave up and simply wrote:

 ** _Eat._**

He folded the paper in half and placed it delicately against the rim of the plate. He left before she could wake.

* * *

Hermione woke surprisingly well rested.

She opened her eyes and saw the corner of covers hanging down by her eyes. She jumped slightly startled at her view being considerably lower to the ground than she remembered.

 _Where am I?_ she wondered. Rising slowly she looked around.

Draco's bed was behind her, its dark covers neatly pulled tight.

She didn't remember falling or rolling off the bed.

 _Draco set a barrier, you clearly didn't fall,_ she told herself silently.

 _Which means that Draco put you here while you were sleeping without you noticing._

Hermione flexed her fingers in the soft covers that were draped over body and looked down. Beneath her was a soft pallet and a small pillow.

She was thankful for her space, it over road any other emotion and squashed the flicker of rejection that might have otherwise risen to the surface. A small part of her heart squeezed at the kindness of her own place and space in Draco's room.

 _He isn't making you sleep with him._

 _Maybe he was being honest when he said it was only to keep an eye on you._

 _Of course he was being honest, remember what he said..._

He had almost called her that name. Even though she had decided to recalim the word for herself and be proud of the fact that she was muggle-born it didn't change the fact that when the slur was said with hate it still stung. But Draco had stopped himself. It was the first time she could remember him ever holding his tongue.

 _Why did he stop?_

Hermione shook her head.

 _You're overthinking things,_ she told herself and closed her eyes.

She didn't want to think about last night. Not about Greyback and not about the horrible nightmare of her friends dying and not the fight she had with Draco afterwords.

 _You shouldn't have said what you did to Malfoy._

She had been cruel, lashing out. Maybe it was because he had always been cruel to him and she just wanted to lash back at him...maybe it was just how emotional she was after the attack, or maybe it was a combination of the two. Either way she was disappointed in herself for stooping to his level and being cruel.

 _He had every right to Silencio you,_ she told herself, and then she remembered the look of horror in his eyes. She knew he hadn't meant to hurt her-that much was obvious. The twack of her head against the wall had been more jarring than painful, but that look in his eyes...it was haunting her.

He had looked so horrified at what he had done.

 _He didn't look that way after he hit you with that Crucio,_ the darker side of her mind challenged and Hermione pushed everything to the back of her mind.

 _You are not going to think about it anymore,_ she told herself and stood. There was a slight clink and she looked down noticing a small shining silver light wrapped around her ankle and a fine line that tethered her the bedpost.

 _What?_ she blinked.

Hermione moved around testing the length. She could walk to the washroom and back and to the table by the windowsill. It stopped her two feet short of the door and several feet short of the fireplace and bookshelves.

She felt like a dog on a leash. She hated it.

As she came back toward the pallet, scent of food had her mouth-watering. On the table by the window was a small plate with two eggs, several sausages and a small portion of fruit as well as toast with jam. She approached the meal cautiously and saw the note. On the small white piece of parchment was a script she recognized from class as belonging to Draco. It said only one word:

 ** _Eat._**

Bossy git, she thought, frowning at the simple order. Still, she was too hungry to refuse and she sat down to ate breakfast.

Her stomach growled loudly and she closed her eyessavoring the smell for a moment.

 _It could be drugged or poisoned,_ a small part of her mind protested.

At this point she was too hungry to care.

Somehow the food was still warm.

It tasted wonderful and hard as it was Hermione took her time chewing each delicious bite slowly.

When she was finished she sat for a few moments just looking at the view.

It dawned on her, as she gazed out at the fountain in the backyard, that it was a beautiful view and were the circumstances different she might have been able to enjoy it.

She sighed and wondered longingly after her friends for several moments before going to the bathroom for a nice long soak in the tub.

There were worse parts to being held captive then having free rein in Draco Malfoy's over-sized bathroom.

* * *

The day dragged on for Draco.

He desperately wanted to check on Hermione.

At the same time he couldn't bear the thought of the way she would look at him after last night.

 _She had every right to look at you the way she did, look what you did to her._

To distract himself Draco went downstairs to the potions room and spent the entire day working and tinkering with the brew of Felix Felicis he was trying to manage.

Draco knew from experience that the potion had to be perfect or it would backfire disastrously. Crabbe had tried his last batch and that had NOT ended well.

It wasn't just the idea of making liquid luck that appealed to Draco-it was the challenge of how difficult it was supposed to be to master. He liked the idea of being able to make something that only good potion masters could manage. Ever since old Slughorn had offered one up as a prize Draco had wanted to manage one for himself. Potter had won the contest for it thought. Draco crinkled his nose just thinking about it. How had boy-wonder managed that anyways? Potter had never beat Draco in potions until that year; It infuriated him.

 _Stop thinking about it_ , he told himself and settled down to focus on his work.

Draco hands and neck were achingly sore from being stooped working by the time his mother called him to dinner.

The table would have been a silent affair if it weren't for his aunt Bellatrix raving away about the glorious dark lord and the pureblood world he was going to usher in.

He wished it had have been silent.

After dinner he sat in the library and read until his head hurt from eye strain.

When he looked up at the clock he saw It was two in the morning.

 _She should be asleep by now._

Draco hadn't realized till that moment that he was waiting for Hermione to be asleep before returning to the room.

 _Coward_ , a small part of him taunted.

Sure enough when quietly returned to his room Hermione was laying asleep on her pallet on the far side of his bed.

She looked peaceful.

The food he had made her was gone and he was glad that she had listened and eaten it instead of being stubborn. He didn't want to see her starve to death and waste away slowly. He didn't want her to suffer like that.

 _You're getting dangerously soft,_ his mind warned.

Draco shook his head. He was to tired to care. Lettingout a sigh he changed into his pajamas before going crawling into bed.

The following morning was just the same: He woke before her, showered, slipped out and made her breakfast then left to spend the day away from his room and returned long after dark-long after she had gone to sleep.

* * *

3 days later.

"Come on!" Hermione muttered and tried for the third time to knock one of the books off of the shelf so she could have something to read.

The wire hanger she had unbent to use as a hook for pulling at books slipped from her fingers. She let out a cry of protest and dropped to the floor.

 _This is ridiculous!_ she thought angrily.

She hated the idea that she might scratch or damage a book in such a method but her desire to have SOMETHING (anything) to read or do had won over the desire to preserve Malfoy's books in perfect condition. She had decided that her sanity out ranked Draco's books, and she was going to go crazy if she didn't have something to read.

With a huff she stretched forward on her belly trying to get it back. Her middle finger nudged it further way.

"Goddamnit!" she let out a frustrated cry and rolled to her back giving up she stared at the ceiling.

It had been three days.

Three days since she had anyone to talk to.

Three days since the nightmare and her fight with Draco in the bathroom.

Three days since she had seen him anywhere except sleeping in bed.

Hermione rolled onto her side.

 _Is it because of what I said?_ she wondered as she stared up and the patterns above her. _Did I make him that mad that he has been avoiding me since?_

 _Or was it because of the silencio?_

There were so many curses he could have used that would have hurt. He could have lashed out and used the crucio on her again...or any other spell that channeled his anger at her words. He had meant to silence her, not to hurt her she was sure of that from the look she had seen after.

She was still mad at him for the crucio.

She was still mad at him for holding her here as a prisoner.

 _Its not like he has apologized for any of it,_ she thought, _and he's been avoiding me like the plague ever since._

 _Ha,_ she rolled her eyes _, Malfoy apologizing, not a chance. He'd probably choke his own tongue if he tried._

Hermione let out a sigh and stretched turning her head to the side. Her eyes caught site of the paper waste basket beside his desk. It was simple and mesh, not nearly as elegant as the rest of the furniture in the room. Through the grating she could see crumpled pieces of paper.

Maybe there was information there about the death eaters; Addresses of hideouts, pieces of a plan. Instructions form the dark Lord.

 _Wouldn't it be nice if i could do something useful and helpful while here,_ she thought and went over to the basket. If she could save the day and help her friends then maybe she could tell herself that it was worthwhile being here and enduring what she had in order to help.

the basket contained only paper and yet she felt decidedly odd rummaging through the contents of a trash bin.

Still, she was bored beyond measure and it was something to do.

It also felt slightly dangerous and forbidden, which after three days of boredom was a welcome rush.

Hermione picked up the bin and took it over to her pallet was on the opposite side of his bed.

Draco's bed acted as a shield so that if he were to come in she would have a moment to shove everything away.

I can't believe I'm excited to rummage through someone else's papers, she thought feeling slightly bewildered at the reality of the situation.

She pulled out the first piece of paper and read its crumpled message

 ** _Granger, you need to eat. Keep up your strength. It's not poisoned I promise_** _._

She snorted at his addition of 'it's not poisoned.' And set aside the note.

The next piece she pulled out was a bill for shopping at Diagon Alley.

The next was an owl-note from Crab rambling on about "Getting some" from a third year student.

Hermione shuddered and set down the note. She went to pull another piece out and picked the note back up.

 _Shows just how desperate you are that you think reading about Crabbe's conquests is worth your time._

She put it back down. The next piece read:

 ** _Granger, I'm sorry for last night..._**

She stopped and re-read the note. Draco _**had**_ tried to apologize.

Draco Malfoy had tried to write that he was sorry.

Hermione blinked and he heart broke a little.

When had he written this?

Was it the first night or one of the nights since?

Had it been eating away at him this whole time?

Was that why he wouldn't talk to her?

Was the pallet she was sleeping on a part of the apology of just a part of the distance he had forced between them over the last few days?

Hermione felt her head spin a little. This was all so confusing.

 _Why? Why is he acting like this?_

She pressed the note out flat and sat there staring at it for a good while before she reached in the mess again, this time her fingers were searching for the thick linen paper that he had used for the first two penned notes.

 ** _I hate this  
I want out  
I want to get out of this fucking place  
This stupid mess  
I want them out of my house  
I wish I could live in my wardrobe_**

I wish I could live in my wardrobe?

Was Draco Gay? Hermione read over the writing a few more times.

She got the distinct impression that it was not intended as poetry that it was just a way of letting out some of the rage inside.

Still, the last line made no sense, unless he was gay…maybe he and Blaze? Hermione turned that thought over and over in her head but something didn't quite sit right. She wasn't about to judge him for it if he was…in fact the image of him and Blaze was actually rather attractive, it just…didn't quite fit.

She got up and walked to his wardrobe opening it.

Shirts and suits, pants and a few pairs of shoes; there was absolutely nothing special about the big wardrobe, except perhaps that it was big enough to hide inside.

Hermione thought of Draco and how his parents were. An image of young Draco running and hiding in the wardrobe had her heart breaking.

Was this the place he hid from the world? She crawled inside and closed the door for a moment. It smelled fresh and for some reason she could almost smell the salt of an ocean. She could see why he would find it comforting to come here. Maybe the last line really was literal.

Or maybe he was hiding.

Hermione climbed back out into the room and went back over to the waste basket.

 ** _I made you breakfast_**

She held the one note in her hand and read it over and over again.

 ** _I made you breakfast_**

Somehow the image of Draco cooking over a stove came to mind.

 _Silly he grew up with magic he used magic to make it._

That didn't change the fact that he had cooked for her, _but why?_

She paced the room puzzling over the note. No one had come to see her. She had been left utterly alone, which was hellish in its own way but far preferable to Bellatrix or one of the other death eaters. He had been caring for her and as she pondered she came to the conclusion that he was probably hiding that he was cooking for her and taking care of her from the rest of the household.

 _Why?_

She twisted her hand in her curly hair wrapping around her finger and spinning it over and over until her scalp grey sore from the repetitive tug.

 _He cares._

That was the only logical explanation. It stopped Hermione in her tracks.

He had no reason to be kind to her like this if he was also hiding it from others. If he was doing it to break down her walls why not let her know and brag about it to the house? But he had hidden the note, thought better of it and crumpled it up.

Was it possible that he was trying to protect her?

 _No. Not Draco._

 _Just moments ago you were thinking that he would never apologize and then you found that note. Maybe you're wrong about this too. Maybe he is...different._

 _No, he hates me,_ she protested, _he's always hated me._

Hermione began reviewing all of his actions and her stomach grew tighter.

If…if he cared there was a chance she could ask him to help her escape for real and come with her.

She had to know for sure.

 _But how the hell do I find out?_

 _It's safer to assume he hates you. Don't be foolish._

She had to know, she would find a way to be sure.

Hermione went through the remainder of the basket and then piled all the notes back in except one.

She folded his apology nearly into a small square and tucked it into her sock, unwilling to let go of the tiny piece of hope.

* * *

Draco was exhausted.

Three nights in a row of less than five hours sleep had him almost nodding off in his book in the library.

"Draco," his mother's voice was firm. "Go lay down. You look exhausted."

It had been ages since his mother had told him to go to bed.

A part of him wanted to protest and tell her that he was old enough he didn't need her telling him when to go lay down.

He told that part of his mind to shut the hell up.

 _She hasn't one brought up the fact that Granger is up in your room._

 _She hasn't once suggested that might be the reason that you're was tired..._

 _So be nice and cut your mother some damn slack._

"Yes mother," he said and set down his book slogging his way up the stairs one painful step at a time.

 _Will she still be awake?_ he wondered. He hadn't talked to her once in the last 3 days and a part of him wanted to, even if it was just to exchange banter.

 _You're an idiot._

 _She hates you._

 _You should not want to spend time with her, don't be stupid._

Draco opened the door and found the lights were off.

 _Thank God_ , he thought and went to crawl into bed and realized there was a lump on the bed.

Draco blinked twice and as his eyes adjusted to the dark, he saw quite clearly that Hermione was there laying in his bed.

She was lying on the covers as if she had fallen asleep sitting waiting for him and had simply fallen over at some point.

His heartbeat ratcheted in his chest. What was he supposed to do?

 _Wake her up and tell her to get out of your bed_

Another larger part of him wanted to curl up next to her and hold her.

 _What the hell are you thinking Malfoy, wanting to cuddle up to someone like her?_

 _You mean someone intelligent, beautiful and kind,_ a part of him answered back. He hated himself for both sides of that mental war and tried to shut it down.

 _So what are you going to do hotshot?_ the cynic in him demanded.

Draco settled for the halfway point: He took the top layer of covers and folded it in half over Hermione then crawled into the second layer so that they were separated even though they were sharing the same bed.

It was a big bed after all...there was no reason not to share it.

Draco was too tired to keep his eyes open.

Sleep took him swiftly.

* * *

Draco was in his wardrobe and so was Granger.

She turned and smiled at him, her hair illuminated softly in the glow of the moon.

She was wrapped in a light pink sarong and holding a pair of sandals in her hands. She set them down nonchalantly and made her way across the beach towards him, her hips swaying gently as she walked.

 _She looks to beautiful,_ he thought as she neared him.

"I was wondering when you'd show up," she said coming closer.

"I didn't mean to make you wait," he answered automatically.

Wait? Was he keeping her waiting?

Hermione smiled and lifted her arms and wrapped them around his neck as if she had done it a thousand times before.

She stared up at him, eyes open and welcoming.

Draco felt something in his chest tighten.

"Do you like it here?" he asked, needing to know the answer.

"I like being with you," she responded and reached a hand up into his silver blond hair.

He shivered at the warmth of her touch.

She pressed her body close and he could feel the outline of her through his clothes.

"Did you miss me out in the real world?" she asked eyelashes fluttering at him.

"Every minute," he answered and touched his forehead to hers. "Did you miss me?"

"Desperately," she breathed and swayed against him her arms squeezing tighter, her fingers pulling at his hair in a pleasure-pain way.

"Prove it," he almost begged.

He needed to know she wanted to be here.

He needed to know she forgave him and wanted him.

Hermione tilted her head up to him and pressed her lips to his in a smoldering kiss.

Draco opened his mouth and met her waiting tongue with his own.

He could feel her smile against his lips as he softened the kiss.

She bit his lip and when he pulled back there was something wrong in her expression.

"Granger?"

She smiled, the look more plastic than real.

His stomach dropped.

"Fuck Granger," he let her go stepping back. "No…this isn't real. It's just a dream."

 _Of course its a dream, the real Hermione would never kiss you._

"It is like a dream come true, being here with you," she said sweetly.

"Shut up," he yelled at the dream version of Hermione. "You're not her."

"But I can be," she wrapped her arms around him once more.

"No," Draco snapped. "You can't be..."

"Draco," she pouted and then when it was obvious he wouldn't yield her face shifted and changed, the eyes growing wild. Hermione wild hair turning dark and the smile turning into a frightening twist of lips and teeth. Suddenly it was his aunt Bellatrix standing in front of him.

"What are you doing dreaming about a Mudblood!" his aunt screeched and reached for his neck.

Draco tried to pull her off but she clawed at him opening up great gashes on his skin.

"Aunt Bellatrix no, please stop. It wasn't what it looked like."

 _But it was,_ his mind answered back, _you let yourself dream of Granger. You wanted her._

"Blood traitor!" Bellatrix screamed and slashed him again.

Suddenly he was back in the washroom at Hogwarts lying on the ground in bathroom surrounded by water.

He was bleeding, and bleeding and the pain…god the pain was so much.

It was too much, and Snape who had appeared at his side wasn't helping this time.

He wasn't coming to Draco's rescues.

This time he was pouring something else into the wounds; something that began to boil and burn and fester melting his skin in thick black bubbles.

Draco screamed.

* * *

 **That's all for this chapter folks. Thank you so much for reading. Please let me know what you think of this chapter or the story as a whole. Reviews keep me motivated and really do brighten my day. This chapter took a while to edit, and is almost 2k longer than the original posting. I hope that if you are re-reading that you find it has better flow and if it is your first time here I hope you enjoy the smooth ride.**

 **Thanks so much and Cheers.  
**


	10. Chapter 8: The Warning

**Thank you to the original reviewers for this chapter** : mmiller0000, ChildofBrisingr, Greenti, EndlessReign, addictedtoloveandfiction, Rouch, nkwolf199, sherbertlemons98, Aid4 and To guest "Amira" f **or continuing to come back and review and to guest** "who" **and** Bren Gail. **Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review since. You are all appreciated.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 8: The Warning

"DRACO" a hard slap across the face woke Draco with a start and he sat bold upright in bed.

He sucked air into his lungs feeling winded and covered his face with his hand turning to find Granger sitting up in bed beside him.

"Did you just slap me?" he asked, rubbing at the stinging flesh of his cheek.

"I tried to shake you awake but that only made things worse. I'm sorry," her head dropped slightly.

Draco paused realizing she genuinely sounded sorry about slapping him.

His shoulders relaxed, dropping visibly.

"Its fine, don't worry about it," he said rubbing his cheek.

Hermione's head came up to look at him and Draco watched her eyes drifted to his bare chest. Draco followed her gaze to see he was covered in a fine sheen of sweat form the nightmare.

She swallowed reflexively and Draco's body responded.

That was not the look of a girl who hated him; it was the look of a girl who liked what she saw and was turned on by it.

 _Not a chance Draco. You are seeing things._

But he had enough experience to know he was right.

She blushed and looked simultaneously sorry and confused.

Without thinking Draco reached out and touched her cheek.

Hermione's hand came up and covered his own.

instead of pulling his hand away she leaned into his touch.

Then she looked at his lips and leaned in but instead of a kiss she came in for a hug.

It was completely unexpected.

Draco was used to women either hating him or kissing him and he realized, as her arms went around him, that Granger was comforting him.

This was not a dream. It felt far too real. The silk of her skin, the softness of her leaning into him was setting his nerve endings on high alert.

Draco felt oddly overwhelmed by her kindness and concern.

The comfort was more intimate in some ways than a kiss could have ever been.

No one had tried to comfort him-not like this, not since his mother when he was a child.

Draco's chest tightened and he felt a stinging in his eyes.

He jerked away when he realized he was about to cry.

 _You are not going to cry in front of Granger._

"Don't," he said and got out of bed.

"Draco wait…"

"You can't" he said not looking at her. "You can't do that."

"I'm sorry, I was only trying to make it better."

"You don't understand," he turned back to her. "Nothing you can do will make it better," his voice broke. "You'll be better off to hate me," he said and shook his head.

He was thankful for the near dark because his eyes were brimming and he didn't dare let her close enough to see or ever know.

 _I'm going to have to hurt you to prove to them I'm on their side. You'll hate me then. But it will hurt you less if you hate me now._

"Draco," she crawled off the bed and came towards him. She put a hand on his chest and he shuddered. She reached up to his face and he pulled back violently before she could feel the wetness there.

"I can't…"

"Draco it's okay," she tried to assure him.

"Not it's not!" he yelled back. "I don't want to hurt you."

His words hung in the air like led.

 _What the fuck were you thinking saying that out loud?_ he demanded of himself.

 _Its the truth_ , he answered back.

And then came the knock at the door.

Both Draco and Hermione froze.

 _Shit._

"Draco, if everything alright in there?" his mother's voice came through the door, "I thought I heard you call out."

"Everything's fine," Draco answered quickly.

"Let me in," his mother's voice was firm and commanding letting him know that there was no use fighting her will on this. Draco knew why: She was checking to make sure he was genuinely okay and that he wasn't being held somehow at wand point by the witch who was supposed to be his captive.

Draco pulled out his wand waving it so the pallet slipped under the bed. He waved it again this time at Granger, tying her and gagging her at the foot of his bed.

Granger looked at Draco with pleading questioning eyes.

 _You idiot,_ he chastised himself. _She's already looking at you like you're someone to save. It's going to be the death of you both and all because you had to open your big fat mouth and tell her you didn't want to hurt her._

 _If you really care about her you need to do what is necessary to keep her safe, which includes keeping your distance._

Draco took a deep breath and opened up the door wide enough for his mother to step inside.

The lights in the room came on as she waved her wand.

Draco squinted at the light and used it as an excuse to quickly wipe the tears from his face before either woman could see.

Narcissa checked around the room thoroughly and then returned to her son.

She touched his face.

"You're warm," she said her voice full of concern. "Are you feeling alright?"

"I'm fine mother, I just had a…bad dream. I must have called out in my sleep."

"My darling," she wrapped him in a hug and he couldn't help but lean into her. She hadn't hugged him like this lately. All of her embraces had been so perfunctory. She pulled back after a moment. "I will go make you some tea," she stroked his cheek. "Back in a moment." She paused at the door and looked down at Granger. "On second thought, why don't you come down with me, I don't want her listening in."

"Alright," said Draco and grabbed his shirt hauling it on roughly. He waved out the lights leaving Granger alone in the dark.

His mother sat with a flourish in her chair as the teapot poured each of them a glass of tea.

"You haven't been sleeping well since you moved her to your room," Narcissa said as Draco finished his first sip of tea.

Draco paused and then took a second sip before setting his cup down.

 _This is your mother, she will be able to tell if you lie so give her at least a partial truth._

"I haven't been sleeping well since the tower," he admitted.

"Yes, yes," she waved her hand dismissively in the air. "But this is different; worse."

"Well, things are more stressful at the moment," retorted Draco.

"You should put her back in the cellar, have one of the other staff watch over her."

"She is my responsibility, last time I left her alone she almost got raped by Greyback."

"Yes, well…" Narcissa had the good grace to look uncomfortable at that fact and Draco was relieved that his mother at least thought that was out of line.

"Don't worry mother," Draco reached across the small table and squeezed his mother's hand gently. "I have everything under control. I promise."

She seemed to take some comfort in his son's assurances and she relaxed back into the chair squeezing Draco's hand before picking up her teacup once more.

 _She loves you, she's only saying this because she doesn't want to see you hurt_ , acknowledged Draco.

A few moments passed in silence with just the company of their two owls making soft sounds in the corner of the room.

For a few moments Draco felt calm and peaceful. The rest of the world went away and he was just sitting sipping tea with his mother.

"The Dark Lord is hosting a meeting tomorrow night," said Narcissa after a long moment. "Here, and he will be staying overnight."

Draco's stomach fell and he was thankful for the peppermint tea and its soothing properties. He tried to hide his reaction behind taking another sip of it, but his mother's eyes were on him and he knew she could see that the news made him uncomfortable.

"He will expect the girl to be presented," she said. "As a trophy to the room, no doubt," when Draco didn't respond she continued. "You can't show any weakness or make it appear as if she has had special treatment."

"I understand."

"I don't think you quite do," Narcissa set down her tea. "Greyback will be coming and he is not happy with how things transpired here last week. He will be looking for an excuse to bring you down and will use your choice to protect the girl from him against you."

Draco nodded.

 _She knows what she's talking about,_ thought Draco, _listen to her._

If there was one thing that his mother knew it was how to navigate high class social politics.

"You are right," Draco said and finished his tea. His mother's warning rang true in his ears.

Lucius may have been the one whom everyone thought of as the head of the house and the one with the plan, but Narcissa was cunning. She kept her head about her even in stressful situations and thought several steps ahead. Draco was grateful knowing that his mother was on his side and wanted what was best for him.

She was an adversary he never wanted to face.

"Thank you mother," he said sincerely. "For caring, and for letting me know." He stood and went over to his mother and kissed her forehead gently. "I'm going to head back upstairs," he said stretching. "I want to be well rested. After all, turns out tomorrow is going to be a bigger day than I expected."

His mother bid him goodnight and let him leave.

Draco went back up to his room and paused before he reached the door.

 _The second the dark Lord looks at her, her eyes are going to give you both away._

An uncomfortable prickle made its way down Draco's neck. He knew what he had to do and it made his stomach feel like it was full of spikes.

 _She'll hate you for it._

 _She'll never know, and it will save you both._

Draco mustered his courage and went into the room.

He knelt down in front of Granger and undid the gag and her ties by hand.

"Did you have to leave me like that?" she asked rubbing at her wrists.

"Yes," he answered. "If my mother had walked back in and seen you walking about it would have…been bad." He stepped away from her and turned on the light.

"Did you mean it?" she asked standing and coming over to him.

 _It won't hurt to tell her the truth now._

"Yes," he answered, not bothering to play dumb at her question. "I hate having you here."

Her face fell.

"Not for the reason you think," he admitted.

"What?" her brows knit together. He wanted to tell her the truth.

"I hate having you here because I wish you were off somewhere safe, away from all of this," he admitted.

He saw the shock on her face at his admission. He watched a flurry of emotions cross her face.

"You mean that don't you?"

"Yes," he nodded.

"I found some crumpled notes today, I was looking through your trash bin," she stumbled over the words and her cheeks reddened. Draco's stomach dropped abruptly.

She had found the notes he had written.

Draco thought of the other things that he had written and tossed out. His cheeks flamed with anger and embarrassment.

 _Fuck, what did she see...what did she read?_

"Please don't be mad," she pleaded and reached out touching his bicep. "I was bored. I've been dying up here for days with nothing to do, nothing to read and no one to talk to. I needed something to keep myself from going completely mental." She babbled quickly almost stumbling in the rush to get out the words.

"So you thought you'd snoop through my stuff," his tone was a little more accusatory than he intended.

"What did you expect?" she asked exasperated and let go of his arm.

"I don't know I just…don't like people in my business," he shoved a hand through his hair. "But I get it."

When she realized he wasn't going to keep berating her for snooping through his things she softened and continued.

"You wrote that you were sorry."

Draco nodded.

"You wrote that you had made me breakfast yourself. Is that true too?"

"Yes."

"Does anyone else know?" she asked stepping close.

"No," he practically whispered.

She was so close, he could smell the sweet scent of her skin mixed with the smell of his shampoo. It was a lovely combination.

"Are you trying to protect me Draco?" she asked looking up at him with her perfect eyes.

 _Don't say it, don't you dare say it._

 _This might be the only chance you get to say it without worrying about the consequences._

 _Don't…_

"Yes," he answered truthfully, half undone by the admission.

"Thank you," she said and reached up tentatively to touch his face. Draco couldn't help but lean into the caress.

"I'm sorry Granger, for everything."

"You are aren't you?" she said eyes examining him intensely.

"I am," he nodded. More than you will ever know. Emotions swirled chaotically inside him knowing what was to come.

"I believe you."

Hermione leaned up on her tipsy-toes and pressed her lips to Draco's cheek.

Draco shuddered closing his eyes. He savored the feel of her lips on his skin. Savored it knowing he would likely never feel it again.

 _She deserves to be protected._

 _She deserves to be saved._

 _Do what you know you have to do to keep her safe._

He didn't want to. A part of him screamed for him not to do it. To keep her here like this as his confidant.

 _Don't be selfish,_ he scolded himself.

 _But that's how I've always been,_ he thought and closed his eyes at the admission. He had lived a selfish life of an only child. Half-spoiled half abused and entirely self-serving..

 _Do this for her._

 _Bear the weight for her._

Draco squeezed Hermione tight.

 _I'm sorry Granger,_ He thought meaning it with everything he was.

Draco raised his wand while she was still tucked in close and whispered "Obliviate."

* * *

 **AUTHORS NOTE: I both hated and loved writing this chapter. I personally don't agree with his decision, but apparently my muse and Draco have decided that this is what is happening now. Hermione will not remember that he is trying to save her and Draco will have to carry the weight of the memory and his choice. (which he made thinking it was the only way to protect her-just like Hermione did to save her parents)**

 **NOV. 2019 UPDATE/ADD-ON: I have gotten rid of a lot of the notes that I put at the beginning of chapters while going back to edit and update. Some notes I simply moved to the bottom/this section, and some I deleted. I do want to mention here, for anyone who cares, that this was the 10th chapter overall (8 chapters plus 2 prologue chapters) and it was when I decided to switch over to doing updates every single week. It was a real challenge for me, but other than being late one Monday (it didn't go up till Tuesday because I literally fell asleep in my chair writing) I actually managed to update at least once every week for the following 36 chapters...which in retrospect is something that I feel kind of proud of. Thank you to everyone who followed and reviewed and made me want to dedicate the time and effort to this piece. Not only did your reviews motivate me in writing, it helped me improve as a person by sticking to a goal even though it was often extremely challenging. Thank you.**

 **ALSO, this is still one of the most intense chapters for me for writing. It's a chapter that, as I was editing, gave me the feels in a big way. Is there anyone else who really got hit hard emotionally reading this chapter?**


	11. Chapter 9: The Bedpost

**A big thank you to everyone who reviewed the original update including** : inkwolf199, LilsBills, Rouch, Greenti, mmiller0000, EndlessReign, Addfam2008, Bren Gail, Wolfling72 and DramioneDestiny, **and thank you to everyone who has reviewed since. I appreciate each and every one of you very much.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M.** **It** ** **contains violence, torture, abuse, molestation, violence around sex, and eventual love/sex scenes. While this story DOES NOT contain rape it does have negative sexual encounters and attempted sexual abuse. If you believe that you might be triggered reading about these subjects please do not continue. I care about people and do not wish to have my story hurt anyone.******

* * *

Chapter 9: The Bedpost

Immediately after the obliviate Draco cast a sleep spell and watched the confusion cross Granger's face before she slipped into unconsciousness.

He didn't want her to worry and he also didn't want her to know that he had taken any time from her.

It was only one day, but it was a piece of her that he had taken.

The memory of today was something he would carry so she wouldn't have to.

Draco caught her as she fell, her body heavy with sleep

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his face pressed into her curls.

The fact that she was asleep and couldn't hear him made it safe for him to apologize, made it safe for him to let his feelings show again.

"I'm so sorry, for all of this." A small tremble passed through his body as he held her close.

She had been sweet.

She had been kind.

She had tried to comfort him.

 _How are you so compassionate even after all I've done to you?_ he wondered and squeezed her tightly.

Regaining his composure Draco lifted her easily, once again surprised by her lightness. He carried her to the pallet and lay her down gently and tucking her in under the blankets.

Draco wiped the dampness from his eyes.

Tomorrow was going to be hell and he had to face it alone, knowing she still thought of him as her enemy.

 _Its better this way, she's safer not knowing- Stronger._

Draco knew it was true just as much as he knew messing with memories was wrong. He would bear the guilt of this choice for her, so she could stay strong. He would hate himself every day for it.

 _Its the least you can do for her,_ he thought.

 _All these years you've hated her for what she is and what your father did to you because of her..._

Draco closed his eyes.

"Neither of those things are her fault," he finally said out loud.

Hermione couldn't help who her parents were any more than he could and if her parents were responsible for raising someone so strong and kind...then even if they were muggles they still had to be...worthwhile...people.

Draco's head hurt, this went against everything he had ever been taught.

 _She believed you,_ his mind shifted tracks. _She believed you are looking out for her._

Draco shook his head not wanting to dwell on it.

 _She never will again._

He knew that after tomorrow and all the things that were to come it would kill any chance of her believing he cared.

Draco rubbed the back of his neck as he looked down at her.

 _At least I can remember, that for a moment she believed me,_ he thought to himself. It was a bitter sweet thing to think about.

Draco left Hermione sleeping on the pallet and began to clean up his room. He couldn't have anything signifying that the day had happened. He was utterly driven by the need make sure she never knew of the obliviate.

Using his wand he repaired and replaced the hanger back in his wardrobe then he went over and looked down at his trash bin.

He saw the linen paper he had written the notes on at the top of the pile.

 _You were an idiot to leave them there in the first place._

 _How was I supposed to know Granger was going to start rooting through the garbage,_ it wasn't something he had ever pegged her doing.

 _You should have thought of it,_ he chastised himself. _You need to be smarter Draco. You need to be more careful._

Draco drew in a breath and pointed his wand at the basket.

"Incindio," he cast. The contents went up in flames until there was nothing left. He waved his wand and the ashes vanished.

Draco scoured the room searching for anything else that might give him away.

He found nothing.

The headache continued to grow and pound in Draco's temples and he rubbed at his eyes with one hand, his smooth face scrunching into lines from the pain and stress.

Why did he have to care? It made everything so much more complicated.

It would be so much better if he could just remain...indifferent to her.

 _You were never indifferent to her,_ his mind argued. _Even before she was captured you were hoping she was off some place safe. You were thinking of her as a worthy opponent._

Now he knew that she was more than just a capable student. Now he knew just what an incredible person she was.

His head pounded.

 _Fuck,_ he put the palm of his hand against his temple and ground his teeth together against the pain.

Draco felt the pull from his wardrobe; felt the need to be somewhere where the world didn't matter and he could be safe. He felt his oasis call his name inside his head and he looked up at the great dark piece of furniture. He only hesitated for a moment before answered its siren call casting the spell and stepping inside its waiting embrace.

* * *

It was night within the wardrobe and Draco waved his hand making the sun rise. He couldn't handle the dark right now, even with its comfort of stars and planets.

He stripped down roughly, his movements hurried and harsh.

As soon as he was free of his clothes he extended his arms out and dove deep into the water.

His lithe body made hardly a splash and he pushed down deep into depths of his personal ocean touching the sandy bottom before propelling himself back up to the surface.

With aggressive stroked Draco pushed forward through the water, his arms churning and dragging him forward at the speed of a practiced athlete. He swam around the island, circling it several times, until his arms and legs burned with the strain.

When he could barely draw breath he stopped and pulled himself onto the large rock of his island and lay flat on his back his chest heaving.

It felt good to push his body to this point. The edge of endurance where physical limitations warred with the desire to keep going. It also felt good to lay here afterwards and just breath. For a moment it made the world narrow down to just the enchanted sky above.

As his breath evened out thoughts of the real world came clawing back.

Draco sat up and grabbed the towel which was waiting there beside him and dried of quickly.

He needed a drink.

He needed to silence the voices in his head that were whispering and worrying over how horrible tomorrow would be.

Draco went to his hut stepping inside.

He stood in the middle of the room for a moment and then without even really thinking about it he picked up a bottle of rum from his shelf and threw it across the room with a yell.

He tossed his head back toward the ceiling and clenched his fists by his side.

"Fuck! Fuck this stupid fucking world!" He yelled so loudly his throat hurt. It didn't matter. This was a place he could yell and no one could hear him.

Draco's head dropped forward, collapsing against his chest.

It felt surprisingly good to just rage and let it out.

With a sigh Draco waved his wand repairing the damage from the bottle with ease. He examined his wand. As usual it felt warm in his hand and tingled up his arm with use. It was a pleasant sensation.

"Why'd you choose me?" he asked ran a thumb along the length of the wand. It was so smooth the finish was such a pleasant satin texture against his skin. "I'm a horrible person. I''m not a hero like Bellerophon. I don't deserve your help."

Draco set his wand down gently and went over to the bar and made himself a drink.

He sat and sipped at it, resisting that urge to just pound it back.

 _Getting drunk won't solve anything right now. Even if it does manage to get the voices to shut up you need to keep it together. You can't afford to loose control right now._

He closed his eyes.

 _You can't protect her if your a wreck and hung over._

Draco let the warmth of the alcohol take its place in his belly and enjoyed feeling it slowly spread through him.

He knew it wasn't a solution, but the warmth in his belly did help settle his nerves.

The clock chimed an hour and he poured another drink.

His brow furrowed as he considered what he would do, how he would handle the following day.

When the chime signaled a second hour Draco's eyes were already feeling tired.

 _You can't afford to fall asleep here,_ he told himself. He knew if slept now he would have a nightmare; it was practically a certainty.

He couldn't handle the added psychological fatigue of a nightmare right now, it would wreck him.

Draco's eyes flickered to the bar top.

There was a solution to his problem, and Draco knew where to find it.

He went over to the bar and tapped on the counter gently. A small pop sounded and a piece of the black bar-top separated slightly and slowly a round tier rose from the surface. A gentile trill of smoke danced out as the hidden tier rose and Draco casually waved it away.

There were about two dozen small vials hidden away there. Draco turned the spinning tier reaching for one of the vials on the far side. It was an elixir for energy he had distilled in his third year. It was after a particularly darkly threatening howler from his father at being second in his class. He had needed something to give him an edge. He couldn't bring himself to cheat, that was beneath him, but he did figure out a way to give him more hours in the day. He had created the elixir for energy to give him more hours to study and cram and work at his grades.

Draco held the vial in his hands.

He hadn't used it in a while.

The elixir always reminded him of that third year. It was the height of his frustration at Granger always beating him for grades directly before she had punched him in the face.

Somehow, even though he had hated her in that moment for giving him a bloody nose, it was the turning point for his view of Hermione Granger.

That punch was the planting of the seed of respect which had clearly taken root deep within him.

 _I think she likes to hit you,_ his inner voice taunted. _She seems to do it quite often._

Draco ignored the voice and uncapped the little glass bottle swigging it back.

He felt the flush rush through him like an overdose of vitamins and caffeine.

There were two side effects to the potion, neither of which would be an issue at the present moment. The first was that, no matter how hard he had tried he could reduce the length of time it lasted. The potion gave 13 hours of unavoidable wakefulness. There was no sleeping to be had while the potion was in its course. He had learned that quite quickly when he had taken it the first time to stay up and study and then lain awake for hours in bed at Hogwarts, after he had crammed all he could, trying in vain to get some sleep.

The other side effect of the potion was an increased desire to be productive.

You couldn't take the potion in order to be more awake to sit like a bump on a log or you'd start to twitch. Taking it to watch a game or just to stay up and snog wasn't enough to satisfy the urge to 'do something'. On the other hand taking it for a marathon study session or a marathon in the bedroom…well that was apparently productive enough to satisfy the potions drive.

Needing to be productive was never an issue during the first few hours. However, thirteen hours straight of a driving need to be productive in some capacity could be quite draining mentally and to a lesser extent physically, which was why Draco hadn't bothered with the elixir in some time.

It was the perfect solution for the moment though, since he needed to stay awake and had no desire to sleep.

After giving the bottle a quick rinse in the sink Draco tapped the top of the tier and it eased back into place seamlessly.

To distract himself and to help ease the itch to "move" and "do" he reorganized the library in his hut , taking notes on what he needed that was missing and which books he no longer turned to for reference or leisure. There were books that were here that would never leave the hut: books that his parents would burn if they found. Muggle books. Those books, he had no intention of moving.

The chime rang twice more before Draco was finished nit-picking things in his domain.

Draco went outside and with a quick dive began to swim again. He did laps for a full hour; this time at a more leisurely pace. He was still sore by the time he was finished and made his way back to the dock and dressing.

He felt significantly better than when he had first entered the wardrobe and his headache was gone.

He didn't feel 'good', and he wasn't happy, but he was refreshed enough to handle what was to come.

* * *

Hermione woke to find breakfast waiting for her. This morning the plate was filled with poached eggs, toast,cottage cheese and fresh strawberries. She went over and sat eating the warm food first.

Despite how hungry she was she chose to leave the cottage cheese and strawberries. She wanted to save them for lunch to spread out the food and stave off the hunger that always began in the pit of her stomach in the afternoon.

When she was finished she went over to her pallet to retrieve the hanger she had unwound yesterday to have a hook to try and reach the books on Draco's shelf.

Her fingers came up empty.

 _That's odd,_ she thought.

Draco hadn't yelled at her for hiding it and yet it was gone.

 _You haven't seen him awake in days. He probably saw part of it sticking out from under your pallet and did away with it,_ she told herself. She frowned. Something didn't feel quite right and Hermione felt a queasiness in her stomach. She rubbed at her abdomen and glanced around the room for anything else that he might have changed while she slept.

The garbage was empty, but other than that she saw no difference in her surroundings.

Hermione went over to the wardrobe and a whiff of the ocean reached her. She closed her eyes and breathed it in. When she opened her eyes she frowned.

There was definitely something not quite right. She couldn't shake the eerie sense that something had changed even though she could not put her finger on what was different.

 _You're losing it Hermione calm yourself,_ _it's only because you've been alone for…_

How many days had it been? They had all been the same it felt as if time was blurring and turning in on itself.

Hermione felt the world tilt with vertigo and an odd panic rose in her chest.

"I can't stay here," she said out loud.

 _You can't run to your friends,_ her mind answered back.

 _I don't care, I can't stay here._

Hermione went to the bathroom and opened the window.

She looked down. It was higher than she remembered.

 _You can still make it, but first you have to figure out a way to get this chain off your ankle,_ she told herself.

Hermione tugged at the chain testing it with her full strength. The tiny links showed no sign of strain even under the greatest exertion she could muster.

She let the chain fall to the ground and paced back and forth for a moment.

Then…like a light bulb the solution came to her.

Hermione ran out to the bedroom and looked at the big wooden bedpost the chain was looped around. It was connected at the bottom and so could not be slipped of. The same could be said for the top, but she examined the fastening at the top of the bed she realized the wood was more narrow there. It was still a substantial piece of wood, and it was still going to take time.

Time, however, was one thing Hermione did have on her hands.

Mustering herself she climbed up to the top of the bed and sat on the wooden beam that connected two of the best posts together. It supported her weight without swaying. Little by little Hermione worked the chain up to the top of the pillar where it was most narrow. Then she wrapped a length of chain around the post and around each hand and began to use the chain to saw at the wood.

Within minutes there was a small pile of wood shavings at her feet.

 _You can do this_ , she told herself.

 _You won't be the damsel in distress or the hostage._

 _You're going to break free and go solo and keep your friends safe._

Hermione smiled to herself. With a renewed sense of determination and strength she set to work.

* * *

Evening came and Draco sat at the long table in between his parents.

Everyone was dressed as if they were having a formal dinner. Draco's pale blue shirt was crisp and magically starched so that there was not a single wrinkle in sight. His hair was slicked back, something he hadn't done in ages, but some how felt appropriate for dealing with what was to come. The gnawing that had started in his stomach earlier that morning would not leave him alone. A niggling part of Draco wanted to just go up to his room and check to see if Granger was okay. The feeling wasn't strong enough that he felt he HAD to act, not like when she was being attacked by Greyback, so he wrote it off as nerves.

Draco looked across the table to where, Snape took his seat and felt a distinct wariness as his headmasters dark gaze examined him subtly from the other side of the table. The scrutinous attention made Draco want to shift in his seat.

Bellatrix sat next to Snape chatting at another death eater while awaiting their guest of honor.

As per usual Voldemort was the last of the guests to arrive, which was good because if anyone made the mistake of being late and arriving after the Dark Lord...things tended to end badly for them.

Voldemort appeared in a whirl of black, slowly becoming corporeal as he and strode barefoot across the stone. Nagini his great snake was at his side and as he neared the table she rose up and and slithered her way across the the surface. Draco tried not to flinch back when she swung her head towards him and flicked her tongue out tasting the air.

"Why is it?" The dark Lord asked stalking around the table. "That no one…" he paused. "Seems to be able to locate Harry Potter for me?"

Silence answered him.

"YOU ARE FAILING ME!" he yelled and everyone at the table flinched.

 _You don't seem to be able to do it yourself Mr. All-powerful,_ Draco's brain started mouthing back and he clamped down on the stream of thought before Voldemort could sense the dissension in him.

The Dark lord calmed himself and sat down at the head of the table. He closed his eyes and when he opened them he was noticeably more calm.

"Severus, give me a report on Hogwarts," he said almost apathetically.

"There has been no unusual activity," Snape drawled. "The other Death eaters who are there have the students very much…occupied with activities."

"I hope that the children are learning their lessons both in and out of the classroom," The Dark Lord said sitting back in his chair. "Children are our future," he added and stroked Nagini affectionately. "We need to protect the minds of our young pureblood witches and wizards and dissuade those who live under the misconception that Mudbloods and half breeds are to be accepted and taken into the fold. Muggles have their place to be sure, but it is not as partners to our kind."

A mummer of agreement rippled through the room.

For the first time in his life Draco felt disgust at the sentiment.

True for the last several years it had made him feel more and more uneasy as he had grown to respect Granger, but this was the first time where he felt truly unsettled and repulsed by his family and the deatheater ideology.

"On that note…Draco," Voldemort called his name. "Fetch the Mudblood."

Another murmur went through the crowd at the table; this one much more discordant.

 _What is he going to do to her?_ worried Draco with a flare of panic.

 _You can't just bring her down_ , his mind protested.

 _Maybe it won't be that bad,_ he lied to himself knowing in his heart that it would be.

Draco stood as all eyes turned to him and pushed his chair back.

"Of course," he answered and bowed slightly before exiting the main hall.

Draco's feet felt like lead blocks as he trudged up the stairs to his bedroom.

 _You have to do this, you don't have a choice._

 _But what is he going to do to her?_ His mind asked again buzzing with all the possibilities. None of them were happy.

 _What if..._

He closed his eyes remembering Charity Burbage floating above the table.

Would Voldemort feed Hermione to Nagini in the same way?

Draco knew he wouldn't be able to just sit there and watch it that happened. If he let her die now it would make everything that he had done so far to protect her completely worthless.

 _Its more than just that_ , his mind argued. _You don't want to lose her._

Draco shoved aside that dangerous thought. He opened the door to his room and found it…empty.

 _Oh no._

There was no sign of Granger anywhere. The spell he had used to keep her in place was gone as well.

Had someone taken her?

 _Greyback…_

Draco's hackles rose.

 _I will kill him,_ thought Draco darkly.

He searched the room for signs and noticed a small pile of wood shavings at the end of his bed.

 _That's odd,_ he thought, his eyebrows drawing together.

Draco walked over to the small and touched his fingers to them. When he lifted them up to examine them closer he noticed the small flecks of blood coating several of fragments. Draco looked up to see that Hermione had sawed her way through his bed post. Blood coated the top where she had broken through, and as he looked back down to the bedspread he could see drops of blood that had obviously fallen from her hands as she worked.

 _Unbelievable._

 _She sawed through my bed_ , he thought slightly bewildered. _Who does that?_

Draco was completely taken back by her determination and tenacity and he felt a small flicker of something that was like pride go through him. It was really quite impressive that she had escaped that way.

The awe gave way to terror.

 _The dark Lord sent you up to get her, if you don't bring her back down he's going to be pissed, and more than just at you. He'll probably skin her alive for running away and then punish you for loosing her._

 _You can't show up empty handed, that's not an option,_ Draco told himself. It was better for the both of them if he found her as quickly as humanly possible and brought her back.

Draco closed his eyes and took a calming breath, his brain switching over from emotional to logical.

Voldemort had called the bind a tracking spell, and unbreakable beacon.

 _If that's the case I should be able to find her without a specific spell,_ he thought.

 _But how do I do that?_

 _It was used on couples, maybe...just think of her?_ That seemed to simple, however Draco was short on time and willing to try so he closed his eyes, breathed in and thought of Granger.

All at once awareness flooded him.

She was not far.

She was running.

Draco opened his eyes. He drew his wand and looked at it, running his thumb over the small notch.

"Take me to her," he said his wand. He focused on the bond and apparated.

It was the first time in his life that Draco had dared to apparate without a destination in mind. It was dangerous and went against everything that he had been taught, yet he risked it for her and kept his mind focused on Granger.

The world blurred around him and suddenly Draco found himself at the bottom of the cliff in the moors on the other side of the forest that surrounded his family's estate. A gentle breeze tugged at him, completely at odds with the windstorm of emotions inside him.

Granger was nowhere in sight.

 _Where is she?_

Draco glanced down at his wand wondering if something had gone wrong and Granger came crashing through the trees.

She stumbled to a halt slipping on the damp grass.

"No…" she breathed. "How…?"

"The Bind," Draco answered simply. He had no time to be pleased that the apparation had worked. The fact that he had found her meant he had to take her back.

"No," Granger shook her head. "You have to let me go."

"I can't," answered Draco.

 _No matter how much I wish I could._

"I can't stay there!" she yelled.

"You don't have a choice," Draco answered.

 _I don't have a choice._

 _Sure you do,_ his mind argued in a deep gravel, _you could go back to the Dark Lord empty handed and either be forced to find her again or, be killed horribly and painfully with your parents so she can escape._

 _She deserves to be free._

Draco looked down at Hermione's hands remembering what he had seen in his bedroom. Sure enough they were bloody and mangled across the palms. She had wrapped pieces of what he suspected was one of his white dress shirts, around them but the red of her blood had darkened them with colour.

Draco walked towards Granger. She turned to run, but she had been running all day and Draco was faster than her even when she was at full strength.

He caught her easily.

"Let me go!" she yelled.

Draco didn't respond.

He couldn't respond.

There was nothing he could say that wouldn't give them away or make things worse.

He apparated back the mansion and dragged Hermione into the main hall. She was still letting loose a blue streak at him when he entered the dining room and the presence of the dark Lord.

The whole trip and return had taken him less than ten minutes and yet it felt like so much more than that.

"Langlock," Voldemort cast and Granger made a strange choking sound as her tongue sealed to the roof of her mouth. She was still able to make noise only now it was a strangled awful thing.

"This," said Voldemort. "Is what we are going to use as bait." He motioned for Draco to maneuver Granger over to him and Draco complied unhappily. "This worthless creature could be considered a leech stealing resources that could otherwise go to deserving purebloods."

Voldemort grabbed hold of Granger's neck slamming her roughly to the table in front of him.

Granger squirmed again his grip and Draco fought the urge to intervene.

"She will draw Potter here, or so young Mr. Malfoy has assured me." Voldemort smiled.

Bellatrix grinned wickedly.

"I want to play with her," said Bellatrix, looking up longingly at the dark Lord. "Please won't you let me?"

"Your lust for blood is inspiring to us all," Voldemort released Granger and she leapt off the table trying to run.

Bellatrix lashed out and her wand became a whip wrapping around Granger's neck.

Bellatrix laughed gleefully.

Draco sat frozen. He felt like an outsider in his own body.

"It has been a week," said The Dark Lord. "And her friends have not come." He smiled. "I think they need some motivation. Don't you Draco?"

Draco said nothing only watched as Bellatrix sent a stream of snakes slithering over Granger's body. He watched in horror as they began to bite her. He saw the skin swell with venom at each point and her body convulse. She moaned through the curse on her tongue and Draco felt his body shudder at the sound.

 _This is wrong._

 _Everything about this is wrong._

"Draco!" Lucius snapped at his son for not answering the Dark Lord.

"Yes," Draco croaked, forcing the muscles in his throat to work. "Of course…"

"And what do you think will motivated them most?" Voldemort hissed.

Draco's brain searched for the right answer.

It came to him at once and he knew what should be done even though he hated it.

It was the best solution that the Dark Lord would accept and the only one Draco could think of that wouldn't ruin Hermione forever.

 _At least not on the outside_ , the darkest part of his mind added.

"Capture a moving photo of her," Draco said swallowing. "And send it to them as a gift."

Draco hated himself in that moment. Hated himself even though he knew the Dark Lord could have picked something much worse; Something like hacking off one of her hands and sending it to them.

"Very good," said Voldemort. "Somebody go get a camera." Draco moved to leave.

"Not you my boy," said Voldemort. "Narcissa, I am sure you know where one is."

"Of course my Lord," said Narcissa and stood slowly and deliberately moving with grace to go retrieve it.

"Draco…you must help us make Granger here more convincing," Voldemort. "Your aunt told me how you wanted her as your play thing and yours alone…Therefore it falls to you." Voldemort cocked his head to the side. "Unless you have grown bored of exacting your revenge on her in which case I am sure your aunt will happily continue…or Greyback would happily take care of it for you."

Draco's head snapped to the side where Voldemort had gestured. He hadn't seen the werewolf at the table. The big oaf must have arrived later.

Greyback was leaning against the far wall. The smile that he gave Draco at the Dark Lords words made Draco want to vomit.

"As If I would give up my toy," said Draco cockily. He heard Granger make a sound and it took everything within him not to meet her eyes which he could feel focus on him.

His mother returned with the camera and handed it off to Snape whose face was eerily placid.

The whole room waited for him.

 _You knew what you were bringing her back to._ _You knew something like this would happen,_ his inner voice said lowly.

 _I wished it wouldn't. I wish they had rescued her first,_ he replied.

Draco turned to face Hermione...and drew his wand.

* * *

 **AUTHORS NOTE: This chapter's earlier edition had A LOT of wrong words. 'though' instead of 'Tough' etc. Things that don't show up on spell check and are really easy to miss as you are typing along. (some earlier drafts of chapters were typed up in their first forms on my phone which has the joy of 'auto correct' and doesn't help with this issue) I did my best to catch all of them in this NOV 2019 edit, but if I missed any please feel free to PM and I will pop back and fix it. I don't mind people giving feedback in a respectful way that helps make this story better. I would rather have a better story than preserve my ego. Cheesy as it sounds, I care more about the 'Art' and passion of expression that I get from making and working on any creative piece than I do about my own personal pride. That said I am still human and have feelings so please be nice.**

 **Thanks so much for reading. If you have been reading for a while but haven't reviewed I would love to hear from you, as for all of you who have already taken the time to review, thanks again. Cheers.**


	12. Chapter 10: The Photograph

****100 Reviews!***** **With the posting of the last chapter this Fanfiction cracked 100 reviews. I cannot express just how happy that made me. I have always wanted to write a story that broke 100 reviews. Thank you to everyone who took the time to review to the original posting of this chapter** ChildofBrisingr, inkwolf199, Greenti, MoonlightHoney, Scorpia11, addictedtoloveandfiction, Ayr, Joey Ramsden, Aid4, Rouch, EndlessReign **and to the "Guest" who reviewed. An extra special shout out goes to** LilsBills **who has been supportive since discovering the fanfic and who was the 100th person to review. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review since. I am now at over a thousand, but I will forever remember this benchmark. Thank you all.**

* * *

Chapter 10: The Photograph

Draco Stepped toward Hermione.

 _You need to do this for her._

 _Better you than Bellatrix._

 _Better you than Greyback._

 _Better you than Voldemort._

He told himself that he was her best option. It was the truth.

At the same time it was better for her it was worse for him.

 _I don't want to,_ his chest ached. _I can't hurt her-not again._

 _You don't have a choice, you owe it to her to protect her, after what she's already been through._

 _Don't let it be worse._

 _Don't let them maim her permanently just to save yourself discomfort._

It was more than discomfort. What he had to do tore into him.

Draco closed his eyes for a brief moment and when he opened them he shut his mind down completely.

One by one he cast the spells.

One by one he hurt her to save her.

Each spell, each attack, made her look more bloodied and worn.

Fresh bruises appeared on her skin and despite his mental shut down, Draco felt them echo in his heart.

Bellatrix snake spell rolled over Hermione. Each viper slithered and bit feasting on the pain. It took a moment for Draco to understand that's what the snake enchantments were doing: Feeding on and creating pain. Like fat leaches they fell off one by one when they had bloated sucking up as- much of her agony as their bodies would allow.

 _She's evil,_ he thought sparing his aunt a glance only to see her crazed with glee.

 _You're just as bad as her,_ his mind echoed back.

Granger's muffled cries gurgled though the spell Voldemort had put on her tongue.

Draco knew those sounds would haunt him forever.

He wanted it to be over, but he couldn't stop, for fear it wouldn't be deemed 'enough'

He had to keep going, keep hurting her so that he could convince the Dark Lord of his hate for the mudblood.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, but in reality was about twenty minute the Dark Lord grew bored of watching and waved his hand for it to cease.

Relief spread though Draco's skin with all the solace of slicing razors.

Draco wanted to vomit.

It took everything he had to control his stomach and maintain the illusion that he was fine and had, had 'fun'.

Snape stood slowly from his place at the table, picking up the camera.

"Hold her," the headmaster said in his usual tone.

Draco picked Hermione off the ground and held her up by her hair.

She so much as flinch or even try to struggle.

"Make her writhe," the Dark Lord ordered.

Draco cast a small curse inflicting just enough pain that strained and wriggled in his arms for the photograph.

 _You will never be forgiven for this_ , he told himself, _and you don't deserve to be, you're a monster._

Snape's face was placid, his demeanor cool.

Draco couldn't understand how anyone could be so calm watching this all go on.

He knew the photograph would be more than enough to motivate her friends to come save her.

It was enough to make him want to say 'fuck it' and save her.

He hated that she wasn't fighting him, because it felt like she was giving up and that was the last thing that Draco wanted. At the same time he was blissfully grateful she wasn't fighting so he didn't have to curse her again for show.

When the photo was finished Draco dropped Granger unceremoniously and returned to his seat exhausted and drained beyond measure. His elixir from earlier was fading and he wanted to just go to sleep, but he needed to last through this meeting.

Sleep would help him shut out the world.

He prayed that when he did it would be a black dreamless sleep, though he knew he wouldn't be so lucky.

 _No rest for the wicked..._

Draco turned and smiled for the Dark Lord.

'See' the smile seemed to say 'See how I love it, thank you for the pleasure of letting me torture her myself.' He smiled at the room, much more smugly.

His aunt had never looked more proud.

His father would not meet his eyes.

His mother was trying to hide the horror at his vicious actions, and for once was failing to mask her emotions.

 _She's just a Mudblood mother remember?_ He wanted to lash out at her for raising him to believe such things.

Even thinking the word now doubled the queasy feeling in his stomach.

He dared a glance at Granger who was laying in a heap on the ground sobbing softly.

 _Look what you've done._

 _Look what you've done to the only person who saw you and reached out to comfort you._

"My Lord," said Snape in a monotone drawl after setting down the camera. "If you would permit me, I believe that this is an opportune time for me to utilize some truth serum on the girl."

"Is that so?" Voldemort raised the flesh where a brow should be.

"Yes, my Lord, at a weak and vulnerable state the potion is most potent," he said it as if reciting lines from a lesson.

"Very well, take her into the other room and do what you will," Voldemort waved his hand dismissively. "I don't want to waste any more time on her today."

"Thank you my Lord," said Snape and he waved a wand lifting Granger magically and taking her into the kitchen.

It took everything in Draco not to protest or follow them out.

 _No more, please just leave her alone._

There was a great buzzing in his ears for the rest of the meeting.

* * *

Granger felt broken.

In all the time she had been at the manor she had somehow managed to keep it together.

Right now she felt fractured.

There was something about Draco being the one to torture her that made it worse.

Even though he hadn't used the cruciatus curse on her this time, the pain had been real.

He had lashed out again at her face and body, bruising and making her bleed.

 _Why did it have to be him?_

 _Why do you care? Its torture either way._

Hermione thought of the snakes that Bellatrix had cast and she shivered.

Snape set her down remarkably gently in a chair in the kitchen. Hermione expected him to tie her up, instead he waved his wand and at cloth from the sink and dampened it handing it to her.

Hermione hesitated afraid to accept the kindness.

"If I wanted to hurt you Miss Granger I would have done it already," he said in a voice that was filled with an emotion she couldn't recognize.

"I won't tell you anything," Hermione said, still not taking the cloth.

"You've been away from the order and your friends for long enough none of your information would be useful or up to day regardless."

Hermione frowned.

"Then why pull me away?"

"To spare you from the Dark Lord's attention." Snape gestured to the cloth hanging mid-air and Hermione finally took it, dabbing away at the blood on her face. She hissed in pain as it touched a particularly sensitive cut where one of Bellatrix snakes had taken hold.

Snape drew a vial from his cloak and hesitated for the briefest of moments before speaking

"I cannot heal your wounds-it would be…inappropriate given the circumstances, but drink this," he extended the vial towards her. "It will help with the pain."

"Why are you helping me?" Hermione asked taking the vial from Snape.

"It is best to not ask questions Miss Granger, the less you know the safer you are."

"Do you know if Harry and Ron are okay?"

"What did I just say?" Snape asked turning away. Hermione reached out and grabbed hold of his sleeve gripping the fabric tightly.

"Please..." she begged softly. Something in her tone must have reached the dark haired Headmaster because he answered her.

"You're friends are alive and well…" he paused. "Last I heard."

Hermione let go of Snape's cloak and sank back in to the chair.

 _They're safe._ She closed her eyes as tears of relief slipped from beneath her lids at the knowledge that Ron and Harry were okay.

She opened her eyes to see Snape turn away from her display of emotions.

Hermione's eyes followed his movements and spotted a knife on the counter.

It was nothing special merely a small paring knife.

A thrill of fear and excitement rushed through her veins.

 _Do it,_ her mind ordered and her hand darted out, almost of its own accord, grabbing the knife.

She slipped it into her bra facing away from her skin, careful not to cut herself as she did.

"You should drink," Snape said turning back to her.

Not wanting to give away what she had just done Hermione chose to obey his suggestion and opened the vial downing its contents.

Almost immediately a numbing sensation spread through her and she felt her body slump involuntarily.

Her limbs suddenly felt tired and so very, very, heavy, but the pain was gone.

Shock spread through her as she realized she felt nothing. No pain, no physical sensation of any kind. She was well and truly numb. It was frightening and at the same time a blissful reprieve.

Hermione tried to thank Snape but her mouth wouldn't obey. She felt a flair of panic at being immobile.

 _What does it matter?_ she asked herself. _I'd rather be numb._

Hermione closed her eyes and rested.

* * *

"What the hell have you done to her?" Draco yelled at Snape when he came into the kitchen. He had had to suffer for an hour listening to all the babble about power and glory all the while knowing that Granger was in the other room being forced to spill her guts and betray her friends.

Draco didn't know what else Snape had done because she was slumped over unconscious. He wanted to throttle the older man.

"Less than you," said Snape slamming Draco up against the wall. "You need to keep your voice down and yourself in check," he warned.

"Get off me," Draco struggled against Snape's hold.

"Shut up and listen."

Draco threw Snape back, using all his strength as leverage. He reached for his wand and before he could so much as touch it he found Snape's wand at his throat.

Snape backed Draco up to the wall again, this time at the point of his wand.

"Now _listen,_ " Snape glared and waited a heartbeat to make sure Draco wasn't going to try anything else. "The others may not be able to see it but I can. I am sure your mother is choosing not to see it."

"See what?"

"That you are protecting Ms. Granger."

Fear snapped Draco's spine straighter.

 _No one can know._

"Did you not see what I just did out there?" snapped Draco in defence of the accusation.

"Yes, I did."

"Then how can you claim that?" Draco spat the words.

"Because I know what spells you like to use Mister Malfoy. Because I've seen you duel with other Slyherin's to prove a point many I know what books you have borrowed. . I know that your mind is capable of coming up with incredibly complicated spells like illusions of yourself you send to class to sit in your place so you can snog a girl without being marked absent, or hexes you twist to make your own to dissuade your classmates from daring to stand up against you even if you weren't a Malfoy." He twisted his wand at Draco. "Every spell you chose out there for her… does superficial damage."

Ice dropped down Draco's back.

"So," Draco tried to feign indifference, his voice wavering and betraying him.

"So, you need to be more careful next time and throw in at least one that really hurts or someone else might notice that you're going easy on her. Someone like the Dark Lord." Snape stepped back.

"No one else saw did they?" Draco's voice cracked.

"I don't believe they did." Said Snape. "Most were too preoccupied with the darkness of the act itself to pay much attention to what spells you were using."

"Are you going to turn me in?" Draco's voice was quiet and unusually reserved.

"I made the unbreakable vow to your mother to protect you," answered Snape. "Turning you over to the Dark Lord would be counter-productive considering I wish to continue breathing."

Draco almost collapsed on himself with relief.

"I didn't want to do it," he choked. "I didn't want to hurt her at all. But that last time the dark Lord sent a message to someone's friends it was with dismembered body pieces. I couldn't stand the idea of him hackling her apart to get Potters attention."

"So you chose to torture her and photograph it?" Snape raised a brow.

"I had no choice," Draco's voice rose and then he reined himself back. "What would you have be do? Leave her to my aunt or Greyback? Just let them have their way?!"

"What I would want is not to have your face in the picture being sent to Potter and the Order. Do you have any idea what they will do to you?"

Snape was right. The order would hate him for that photo, more than they already did.

"I don't care," said Draco

"Excuse me?"

"I don't care," Draco repeated, realizing it was true. "If they want to beat and torture me for it they can damn well do it. I'd rather that than Granger getting a fucking hand or foot cut off.!" he growled the last few words lowly at the older man.

Snape's face registered a flicker or surprise at Draco's words.

"You should tread very carefully Mr. Malfoy," said Snape and he lifted his chin. "Lest your feelings for her betray you."

"What feelings?" Draco scoffed. "I'm just trying to protect her."

"Exactly," said Snape. "You have no reason to protect her unless you have feelings for her. And the lengths you are going to do so are very telling of the depth of those feelings."

"Shut up," Draco snapped. "You don't know anything."

"I know more than you can imagine boy," said Snape. "Now don't make my job difficult. Protect her if you must, but don't get caught."

"That's the goal," Draco said sarcastically.

Snape crossed his arms over his chest looking at Draco with severe disapproval.

Draco shifted.

 _You shouldn't antagonize him,_ Draco thought. _At the very least he is helping you. If you aren't going to show gratitude at least be respectful,_ the voice in his head sounded an awful lot like the bushy haired girl in front of him.

"What did you do to her?" asked Draco respectfully.

"I gave her a numbing sedative potion."

" _You_ helped her?" Draco could not hide the surprise from his voice.

"Truth serum won't serve any purpose," Snape countered. "She wouldn't have any new information for me to pass along."

"So you lied to take her back here and give her something for the pain." It wasn't a question as much as a statement.

"You would do well to not say such things aloud Mr. Malfoy," said Snape adjusting his robes. "I recommend you take her back up to your room before you draw any more attention to yourselves today."

"Why are you helping her?" Asked Draco. "I presume you don't have feeling for her."

"To help you," said Snape as if stating the obvious.

Draco doubted the unbreakable vow's needs extended out this far but he wasn't about to complain at the help.

"You should go now," said Snape. "We have wasted enough time talking. Someone is bound to come in soon."

Draco nodded knowing his professor was right.

With little effort Draco picked Granger up in his arms. She felt heavier than usual and barely stirred.

"Thank you," said Draco quietly to Snape. "For helping her when I couldn't."

"You need to be more careful Draco," Snape said again as if hammering it home and repeating it would somehow make it better. "You need to keep your feelings in check."

"I'm trying."

Snape said nothing, only turned away.

Draco carried Granger up the stairs and back to his room.

The few death eaters who were lingering around socializing with one another, cast glances his way looking to the bloodied girl in his arms, probably thinking the worst of him bringing her up to his room.

Draco tried to ignore their stares.

 _They don't know anything,_ he told himself.

 _What they think doesn't matter as long as it doesn't put her in danger._

When Draco finally made it back to his room, he locked the door and let out a shaky breath. He looked down at Hermione and then walked over to her pallet laying her down as gently as he could.

Draco closed his eyes and began chanting the same healing spell that Snape had used to heal him in the bathroom after Potter's attack. It was the strongest healing spell he knew.

Light glowed around her and still Granger remained motionless.

 _Relax Draco, it's likely just the potion Snape gave her keeping her so still._

Draco felt a modicum of relief when her cuts and bruises had faded. He kept up work chanting and holding his position working on her until the cuts and bruises faded and only a few small pink marks remained.

He was exhausted from the effort, but it was worth it to see her better. He wanted to erase every mark from her skin.

 _No matter what you do, you'll remember and so will she._

 _She doesn't have to remember,_ his mind offered.

He knew that last thought was selfish.

As much as he wanted to erase this memory he couldn't.

She needed to remember.

She needed to hold on to the hate and the fear.

It would keep her strong and keep her safe.

If the Dark Lord looked into her mind and didn't see today... then…things could get worse.

 _But she hates you for today,_ his mind protested.

 _Let her hate me, it will keep her stronger._

 _You deserve her hate after today._

Draco didn't know that he had been crying until one of his tears fell and landed on Grangers cheek. He looked down at the glistening drop on her pale skin and wiped it away gently with his thumb, then he wiped his own eyes and sniffed. This was a different kind of crying, not a sobbing loud cry and not one of self-pity or frustration. No, these were silent tears for a crime he had to carry.

"I'm so sorry Granger, I wish there was another way," he touched her cheek again. "I wish I could protect you better. Save you from this...save you from me."

He wanted her consolation.

He wanted her arms around him as she had before the day she had found out….the day he had taken from her.

He wanted her to tell him she forgave him for this crime even though he knew it was unforgivable.

It was hard for Draco to pull himself away from Hermione. He sat there looking at her for a while wishing that they were both somewhere else. Somewhere safe where all of this was just a bad dream.

Eventually he pulled himself away and threw himself down on his own bed and fell into a restless sleep.

* * *

Hermione lay on her pallet unable to move.

She had heard everything.

Everything that Snape and Draco had said in the kitchen...

Everything that Draco had said to her just now thinking that she was out cold.

She had felt him healing her...

And had felt just now the hot drop of a tear falling from his eyes on to her face.

Snape had told Draco to keep his feelings in check.

Snape had said that Draco had only used superficial attacks.

Draco had hurt her to keep the Dark Lord from hacking her to pieces and sending those pieces to her friends.

 _He still tortured you, her mind argued back._

 _He did it to protect me,_ the thought came unbidden into her mind and she knew without a doubt that it was the truth.

Draco Malfoy, however messed up his methods, wanted to save her.

 _Why?_

Draco had said he would rather be beaten and tortured by her friends than let her loose a limb. Hermione had no doubt that if Draco hadn't offered the idea of a photo she that a loss of limbs was exactly what would have happened.

She had the urge to rub her hands together but could not lift them to do so.

Inside she was reeling.

Draco cared about her… had _feelings_ for her.

Hermione lay on her pallet, thoughts keeping her awake.

 _Why?_

Why did Draco have feelings for her? And since when? Was protecting her what had been doing on since the start? Had everything he had done to hurt her so far been to keep her from greater harm?

Hermione began replaying every event since she had arrived back through her head through the lens of protective action.

Her stomach grew tighter. Through that lens Draco's actions made sense. Draco and Snape's conversation in the kitchen made everything line up to the answer...the truth: Draco cared for her and what trying to protect her because he had feelings for her.

 _He was crying for you..._

Her mind mulled over things.

How could she hate him?

How could she not?

Hermione's mind drifted to the days before when he had avoided her after the silencio in the bathroom. He cared… that was why he had looked so horrified at the spell her head to hit the wall. That moment was the only time Draco had caused her any harm without witness or cause. It was an accident... It had been an accident.

She needed to tell him that she knew...that he didn't have to keep avoiding her because of that or holding on to that moment.

 _You can't,_ she answered herself. _You can't let him know that you know either. He's trying to protect you and it will undo everything if you do._

 _He has other moments he deserves to feel bad for,_ her mind countered. _Like the one where he just tortured you._

Rational thought told her not to be mad at him for hurting her when he was only trying to protect, but the memory…the pain prevented her from distancing herself from what he had done.

 _You shouldn't hate him,_ one side of her said.

 _Yes, you really should,_ the other side answered.

The truth was Hermione didn't hate Draco. What she did hate that she was in the damsel in distress situation. Hated it more than she cared to admit.

She had always been the smart one, the clever one to get out of situations like this. She had never related to the princesses in stories who waited around to be rescued and she hated that she was almost like that now. She also knew she had a decision to make about escaping now, because if she did get away Draco would pay the price and now that mattered to her.

If she did get out and went to her friends Voldemort would use Draco to track her down.

 _I can never go back to my friends. Not until this whole thing is over._

Hermione shuddered and realized she was gaining back her mobility.

She lifted an arm sluggishly and rubbed her face and then she looked down at her hands feeling suddenly very grateful for the fact that they were still there at the end of her wrists.

 _Draco is the reason why they are still there._

 _It doesn't change the fact that you need to get out of here before something worse happens, something that he can't protect you from._

Draco hadn't tied her up this time. He hadn't re-cast the spell to hold her.

She sat up in her pallet and reached into her bra removing the paring knife. She turned it over in her hands. The blade was warm from her skin.

 _You should run. You could make it_

 _But then what about Draco?_

Running would still mean Draco being forced to find her. What if Draco cared enough to refuse now? The Dark Lord would make him-would force him-torture him to make Draco lead them to her.

 _It would serve him right getting tortured,_ a part of her mind snapped.

 _No,_ she shot back. She knew she didn't want that. Not now that she knew he had saved her from so much worse.

What she did want was to see her friends again. She missed them, would give almost anything to see or even speak to them again.

 _But you can't, not without endangering them._

At least if she was out she could owl them and let them know she was okay.

She would figure something out. Somehow, someway. She sliced a small opening in the pallet and tucked the knife inside laying back down. For now she would benefit from a good night's sleep and taking some time to regain her strength.

A moan from the bed caught Hermione's attention. She turned her head at the sound to look at Draco.

"No," she heard him call. "No, don't..." he turned to the side and she saw the pain on Draco's face, scrunched tight. "Please..." He turned away from her hissing as if in pain.

Hermione moved without thinking and crawled up onto the bed.

"Draco," she put a hand on his shoulder.

He yanked away and his expression contorted.

"No," he choked and she saw his nails dig into his own forearms.

Hermione's eyes widened.

She reached out, gently this time and placed one hand over his own the other on his back began rubbing in slow circles.

"It's okay," she said softly.

"Please, please, don't…"

"Hush now, everything is going to be okay," she squeezed his hand gently continuing to rub his back.

 _What are you doing?_

Hermione had no idea where the actions came from, but she couldn't stop herself from soothing him.

Draco moaned again and curled into a ball his body shuddering.

"Shhhhh," she hushed him soothingly and lifted her hand from his, drawing her hand through his hair.

Slowly the tension began to ease from his face and his shoulders relaxed. Hermione lay down behind him rubbing his back. His hand squeezed into his bicep again, nails digging in and Hermione reached back stilling the motion with her fingertips.

Hermione began humming softly to him, a song her mother had sung as a lullaby when she was a child.

She felt the moment when he let go of the nightmare and slipped back into a deeper and more peaceful sleep.

It was somehow comforting to her to comfort him. She felt a kind of peace she hadn't since she had ended up here at the mansion.

 _You need to get up and go back to your pallet,_ her conscious warned.

 _I know, I will in just a bit,_ she answered, not wanting to let go of the feeling of peace.

Hermione continued rubbing his back for a few moments longer...

And fell fast asleep.

* * *

 **That's all for this chapter folks, lots of edits on this one, hope you enjoyed reading it. If you did please drop a review and let me know. Thanks so much.**


	13. Chapter 11: The Dreams

**Special thanks to those who took the time to review last chapter** : roon0, LillsBills, Addfam2008, -Chan, Bren Gail, mmiller0000, Starearth, EndlessReign, addictedtoloveandfiction, Wolfling72, Rouch, AnayaR, inkwolf199, Aid4 **and thank you to the guest KT. and thank you to everyone who has reviewed since. You are all appreciated.**

 **This chapter is dedicated to:** Scorpia11 **Thank you for supporting me since practically the beginning and taking the time to always review and chat. If you guys enjoy Dramione you should go check out Scorpia11's fanfictions, they are good.  
**

* * *

Chapter 11: The Dreams

Hermione was back at Hogwarts in the common room of Gryffindor tower. The warm colours and familiar smells made her feel safe and calm.

 _My home away from home,_ she thought with a sigh.

She wished she was back at home with her parents and a wave of sadness flowed through her.

 _They wouldn't know you if you stood right in front of them,_ she reminded herself.

 _You did it to protect them._

It was the hardest thing she had ever done and a small part of her felt guilty. She had stolen herself from them-stolen a piece of their lives. She wondered if they, on some level, noticed the absence...noticed something missing. Had she left a hole in their hearts or was the spell she had cast strong enough to erase even the feeling that something was gone that had once been there? Was she as shadow in the corner of their minds eye, flickering away as soon as they looked? Or not even memorable enough to be an absence?

Hermione closed her eyes trying to push away those thoughts.

She was safe here at Hogwarts and after everything that had happened at the mansion being safe was good enough.

Outside the window was a light drizzle of rain, pitter-pattering on the pane's soothingly. A log in the fireplace popped and Ron came and sat next to her on the couch draping his arm around her.

It was harder than usual for her to ease into his arms. Something small about it felt forced.

 _It's because he left you there so long._

 _You can't blame him, you know he had to have tried,_ she told herself.

"I missed you 'Mione. Something fierce," Ron pulled her in close and Hermione let him. She wanting to sink down into his arms and let go of all of the tension that was lingering around her.

 _Relax,_ she told herself.

"We were right worried about you, you know. Worried sick," said Ron and while the words were meant to be comforting they didn't reach Hermione the way she wanted them too.

Hermione looked up and Ron and saw him looking intently down at her as if willing her to believe him. She could almost feel how he wanted her to just be "okay" and assuage his guilt.

 _Why is it my job to make him feel better?_ the part that was still mad at him asked. She closed her eyes and tried to push the emotional side down.

"I believe you," she answered, without looking up at him.

"I'm just glad Harry and I got you out of that place."

"So am I Ron." Hermione answered and snuggled deeper into his arms, finally able to let a little of her tension go.

He and Harry had come for her. They had rescued her from that hell. Everything was okay now.

"How did you survive there anyways? Harry and I were both worried you were dead."

Hermione stiffened immediately.

She couldn't bring herself to talk to Ron about what had happened. She didn't need to add to his guilt and she didn't want to re-live things herself.

And…more than that, she knew Ron wouldn't understand if she told him about Draco.

"Ron I'm thirsty," she sidestepped his question, sitting up. "Can you bring me some butter-beer?"

"Sure 'Mione," said Ron with a nod. "Whatever you need," he unfolded himself from the couch and left her alone staring at the crackling fire.

While she waited for Ron to return Hermione looked into the fire and tried to let the warmth and light seep into her.

"Here you go," a soft voice said and a hand came into view with a mug of the sweet liquid. It wasn't Ron's hand-It was far too elegant and pale and beautiful. Hermione recognized the hand immediately and leapt off the couch turning to face Draco.

"What are you doing in our common room?" Hermione demanded.

"Bringing you a drink of course," he said as if it were the most obvious thing. "You said you were thirsty."

"I told ** _Ron,_** I was thirsty," Hermione shook her head. "Not you."

"Does it matter?" asked Draco tilting his head to the side. His eyes were softer than usual and the play of the fireplace against his skin gave him a warm glow that added to the illusion of gentleness in him.

"Yes..." Hermione answered.

 _It has to matter. It has to be Ron who helps and saves you and bring you Butter-beer. He's your friend. He...might have been turning into something more._

Even to herself the words felt slightly off making Hermione feel a little ruffled, then guilty.

She had wanted Ron for a while and recently it had seemed that the feelings were returned. She thought back to when they were all on the run together.

 _Ron left you then too,_ a part of her mind whispered.

 _He came back...it was the Horcrux, you can't blame him for that._

"Why can't I be the one to give you what you need?" Draco asked, pulling Hermione away from her thoughts. Draco set the glass down and reached for her hand slowly enough that she could have pulled away.

She didn't

His hand was warm and soft. His fingers sent a tingle up her arm.

"Because that's not how we are Malfoy," Hermione said looking down at her hand in his. It was a pretty image: their hands together.

Draco slowly laced his fingers through hers. She did nothing to stop him.

 _You should stop him, you shouldn't be doing this._

"We could be," he answered. His eyes locked with hers and he slowly brought her hand to his lips kissing the back of her fingertips softly.

Suddenly the room felt so much smaller and the fireplace so much warmer.

Hermione felt her cheeks flush.

"Draco..." she tried to think of something to say but all that came to her was his name.

"It's okay Granger," Draco pulled her in close and held her in his arms. He was solid and warm and felt like safety.

 _He feels like safety because he was the one who tried to keep you safe._

"I don't know what to say," Hermione finally admitted nestling her head into the crook of his shoulder. He smelled wonderful and she breathed in deep closing her eyes.

"You don't have to say anything," Draco's voice was deep and soothing. He pulled her down onto the couch gently and shifted them so that he was sitting behind her holding her close.

She felt engulfed by him and his nearness; Overwhelmed and safe at the same time.

It terrified her.

She trembled.

"Are you cold?" he asked and pulled her in closer.

"No..." she answered. She could feel the hardness of his chest against her back, so warm and reassuring.

A blush crept across her face.

"I'll keep you warm Granger, I'll keep you safe."

 _You should pull away. This is wrong._

"You can't keep me safe," she answered, he brain feeling suddenly foggy. Where was she really? When did she get back?

"I can try," she heard the conviction in his voice and craned her neck to look back at him.

Their eyes locked again and Hermione's lips parted. Draco's gaze flicked down to her lips and he moved forward painstakingly slowly.

"Draco…"

 _You can't let him kiss you._

"Yes?" he asked, his lips a hairbreadth from hers. She could feel his breath caress her skin.

"Mione!" Ron's voice came from behind them and she turned to see the glass of butter-beer he was carrying slip from his hands.

Time slowed and Hermione watched the glass fall...felt Draco pull back...saw Ron's face contort... and then the glass crashed to the floor shattering.

* * *

Hogwarts and the dream shattered along with the glass and Hermione found herself awake in bed surrounded by warmth.

The shock of the abrupt awakening gave way to a faint horror at both what she had dreamed and where she was.

She was in the Malfoy manor, in Draco's bedroom, in Draco's bed.

 _Oh no..._

This was Draco, her captor-Not Ron.

 _You almost let Dream Draco kiss you._

 _It was only a dream,_ Hermione protested.

Despite the nature of the dream she had slept more deeply than she could remember in the last few weeks. Her peaceful slumber was completely at odds with what should have happened, given how horrible the day had been. She should have been having nightmares, not dreaming about Draco bringing her butter-beer and holding her close.

 _It's because you know the truth. You know he's risking his neck to protect you._

 _No. No. No. No Hermione you are not allowed to think like this._

It was one thing for her sleeping brain to have those kind of thoughts and it was another thing entirely to let herself think such things while she was awake. Hermione tried to shut down the arguments raging her in her head and assessed her situation like the rational human being she was.

Draco's left arm was draped around her and Hermione realized with slight horror SHE was the one holding his hand tightly between her breasts as if keeping him in place. Their fingers were laced tightly together just as they had been in the dream. His right arm was beneath her head acting as a second, rather firmly muscled pillow.

She needed to figure a way to extract herself from the bed without waking Draco. Awareness of him behind her increased with every rise and fall of his solid rib cage at her back distracting her.

Draco shifted and a second awareness hit Hermione. Draco was hard, and the length of that hardness was pressed tight up against her ass. Some darkly primal side of her screamed for her to grind against that length while her rational mind demanded she pull away immediately.

A rush of heat pooled between her legs joining the warmth that had grown through the evening while she slept. Her body had responded of its own accord to their close proximity. Her body wanted him.

Panic seized her chest.

 _You can't be here, this can't be happening._

 _What the hell do I do?_

 _This is why you should have gotten out of bed when I told you too,_ her conscious said in a very 'I-told-you-so' manner.

Draco stirred as if sensing her tension.

 _You're still holding his hand._

Hermione slowly opened her laced fingers and tried to extract her grip from his hand. Draco's fingers tightened around her reflexively pulling her closer into his body. His right arm slipped down from under her head and wrapped around her rib cage just millimeters from the underside of her breast. She nearly choked on her tongue as he pressed his hardness more firmly against her. He was…large. Larger than anything she had ever felt-not that she had much to compare it too. Something about that fact had her mind spinning. The heat was coming off him and she felt as if his cock was burning against her backside.

The awareness of his arousal was terrifying both because of what she had she had been through and how her body was responding.

 _You can't want him,_ she scolded herself.

 _Too bad you do, her inner vixen chided. That dream you just had and the ache you're feeling now suggests otherwise._

The ache increased started to throb in time with her heartbeat deep in the untouched places of her body. She bit her lip wanting to moan but afraid to make a sound.

This was too much. She felt like crawling out of her skin and the worse part was it wasn't from revolt but desire. She wanted to escape her skin and the fact that her body was craving the young man at her back. She felt betrayed by her own body and it made her feel almost sick.

 _This is just chemical, its hormones, nothing more. You and Draco are just apparently biologically compatible._

 _It doesn't mean anything. You don't really want him_

"Ynmphss...Beautiful," Draco Mumbled.

Hermione's eyes widened. She glanced back but sure enough his eyes were closed, his lids not moving.

 _He's dreaming, you need to get yourself out of this bed this instant before he starts reaching out and groping in his sleep._

She tried to calm her breathing. Draco inhaled deeply in his sleep and squeezed her closer.

 _He's asleep; he's not doing this on purpose. He's probably dreaming of Pansy or…or some other hot Slytherin Girl. You just need to find a way to get out of bed without waking him so he doesn't realize that you got in bed with him._

"Hermione..."

 _What?_

Hermione's pulse skipped a beat before her heart rate started to climb drastically.

 _No..._

"Mmmm," he moaned and his moth dropped down to the back of her neck. He didn't kiss her but she could feel his lips resting there and it had her skin tingling.

A sweat broke out over her skin and Hermione struggled once again to extract her hand from his, a sense of desperation growing with each second.

This was dangerous. What if Draco woke up and took her being there as permission to do more to her? What if he used it as excuse?

"Granger..." he shifted against her again and whimper escaped her mouth.

 _This isn't happening to me._

Her brain couldn't process it, couldn't handle it.

She was in Draco's bed...In Draco's arms and...He was dreaming...of her.

* * *

Draco was having the most wonderful dream.

It was the kind that you get just before sunrise... the kind that seems so real, you can almost taste it.

Granger was with him and it felt like she was really there. She felt warm and solid wrapped in his arms.

They were standing together on the edge of the dock in his wardrobe oasis, staring out at a soft sunset. Draco had used magic to slow the setting of the sun so that they had time to really appreciate the changes of of hues as the sun slowly dipped down over the horizon.

"It's beautiful here," Hermione said, swaying against him.

"You're beautiful," Draco whispered back. "And I'm glad you're here," he smiled . Hermione leaned her head back for a moment and looked up at him. She returned his smile, at first hesitant and then fully. After a moment she turned back to watch the sunset.

It was a dream, Draco knew it was, knew that it had to be, because there was no way that the real Hermione would let him holder her like this. There was no way she would smile at him like that. He knew it was just a dream and yet...he didn't try and fight it or wake up because he wished it were real.

"Hermione?" He asked.

"Yes?" she answered.

"Promise me you won't turn into my aunt and try and kill me again."

"Not this time Draco, you're safe," she said squeezing his hand gently.

Draco's shoulders relaxed a little.

When he knew he was dreaming it was easier to wake up if things turned dark. When he was conscious of the fact that he was asleep it was almost as if he had some modicum of control over his actions and the general happenings of the dream, as if the sheer knowledge gave some power so he wasn't so helpless and vulnerable.

 _If only you always knew...then you could walk away from the nightmares._

Draco looked down at his dream-Hermione.

"I know you're only a dream but I feel you here with me," he said feeling like he was breaking the forth wall in a play.

 _I wish it was the real you,_ he thought as he dropped his mouth to her shoulder and kissed it gently.

Her skin was so soft.

"Can you forgive me Hermione?"

"This is your place Draco, anything can happen here." she squirmed in his arms, readjusting their position and he sucked in a breath.

She felt so damn good...so real.

"I wish it could. I wish I could take the real you here," he voiced his desire openly to her. "I know it's not possible. Just like I know she'll never forgive me. Not for all I've done and all I may...will do."

"You don't have to think about that now," Hermione turned and faced him stroking his cheek in the same way the real Granger had the night she tried to comfort him-the night he had obliviated from her memory.

Guilt and pain ate at him and her touch helped sooth both.

"I know," he answered. "I can't help it though." He looked past her and out at the gently cresting waves.

"Draco..."

"Yes?"

"Draco," she began pulling him forward by the hand, leading him somewhere.

It felt like she was slipping away and Draco held tighter, not wanting to lose her or his grip on the dream.

 _Don't leave me, please._

"What's wrong?" he asked following her.

"Draco," this time the voice was loud enough to wake Draco from his dream.

* * *

Draco shook away the dream, pulling himself to consciousness and raised his head from the pillow blinking. His room came into view and Draco found that he was not alone in his bed. He looked down to see Granger looking up at him. She looked desperate and it only took him a minute to realize why.

Draco froze.

She was in his bed pressed against him and he was uncomfortably hard.

 _By Merlin her ass feels like heaven._

In one second his mind took in every curve of her body: the warmth of her next to him, the softness of her skin, the delicate ridges of her rib-cage, the scent of her body-and how good it all felt.

 _Fucking hell..._

No wonder the dream had felt so real: it had been drawing from reality.

"Granger?" her name sounded strange, his voice tight. Draco looked down at his hand which was tangled in his own and far too close to her breast to keep thoughts innocent. "Why are you holding my hand?"

"I don't know it happened while I was sleeping," she was blushing bright red. "Can you let me go now please?"

"What?" he blinked at her. He was having trouble thinking straight, still groggy from the dream and distracted by her amazing body curled in so close to his own.

 _Imagine sinking into her…_

 _Fuck. Don't. Don't do that, don't think about that_. His dick ached with the thought.

"You wouldn't let go..." she looked close to tears.

 _Look at what you've done now. Let her go dammit,_ that thought broke through and Draco's mind finally cleared.

"Shit..." Draco pulled back from her untangling their limbs and scooting backwards.

Granger jumped out of bed like a frog escaping a pot of boiling water.

She stood there in front of him... trembling.

"Granger I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..." the apology tumbled out of his mouth before he could think better of it.

She looked so frail.

He wanted to reach out and comfort her.

The desire to comfort her as she had comforted him halted him in his tracks.

 _What the hell was she doing in my bed?_

He frowned, eyebrows knitting together.

This did not make sense in the slightest.

"Why were you in my bed?" asked Draco.

"You were having a nightmare," Hermione looked on the verge of tears. "I was rubbing your back and then I fell asleep," the tears that had threatened began to fall.

 _You made her cry, again._

 _But why the hell was she in my bed? I just tortured her and her first thought was to comfort me while I had a nightmare?_

 _She's too kind for her own good; you need to shut this down. Now._

 _But…I don't want to hurt her like this, this is different. She was being kind._

No one was kind to Draco. Some fawned, his mother doted, but no one was kind and here Hermione was again...being kind...even after what he had done. Even after forgetting the first time and being tortured in between. She was still being kind. It made his heart ache strangely in his chest.

She deserved better than him.

Draco closed his eyes knowing he had to protect by being cruel now. He didn't want to be which made it so hard to voice the next words. All he wanted to do was pull her back into his arms and tell her everything was going to be okay...he wanted her to tell him that things were okay. He wanted her kindness and her comfort. Instead he did what he needed to do in order to keep her strong...keep her safe.

"What are you stupid?" he asked lashing out.

"Why do you have to do that?" she choked.

"Do what?" Draco scoffed and tried to will away the hardness of his body so he could stand and address her properly. "You're a prisoner here and I just tortured you. What the fuck is wrong with you that you decided to up and crawl into my bed to try and comfort me? Or do you think you can win me over? Because you can't." he was half-yelling.

"Stop it Draco."

"No." he stood. "You stop. Stop trying to think of me as better than I am. Stop your hero-mapping and girlish fantasy." The truth of his own words scared him. That's what she was doing, just mapping good on to him. Draco stalked towards her his voice going dark. "Or do you want me to use you like they all think I am? Lay you down in my bed and fuck you like-"

Hermione swung at his face with an open hand and Draco caught her by the wrist mid-air.

"Don't even think about it," he warned in a growl. "I am getting sick and tired of you messing up my face."

"So I am I," Hermione shot back.

Draco's body locked. All the colour washed out of his face as he was reminded of the previous night and what he had done-how he had messed up her face in front of the Dark Lord and the other death eaters.

The room seemed to tilt beneath his feet and Draco released her wrist as if scalded, stumbling backwards. He grabbed hold of his bedpost for support, his eyes locked on the ground until the wave of anxiety induced vertigo passed.

He swallowed and looked back up at her beautiful tear-lined face.

He hadn't been able to control his reaction to her words and it had been too severe. He had given himself away, and couldn't just pretend it hadn't happened.

 _You can't let her know you care...you can't let her believe it or the Dark Lord will see._

 _Think about what Snape said right before you brought her up here. You need to be careful._

"I am not your friend Granger," Draco said, his voice suddenly hoarse.

With every fiber of his being he wanted to wipe away those tears and tell her he was sorry for…everything… that everything was going to be alright.

He watched determination harden in her eyes. Somehow it made her look even more beautiful than she had in his dreams.

"No," she answered him finally. "You're not my friend." Draco saw the saw the sadness around her fade. Her chin raised and her eyes met his flashing with anger and determination.

 _Good,_ he thought to himself. Anger would make her feel stronger. Anger would be her shield. In that moment he didn't care if the anger was directed at him, at least she would be strong.

"Exactly. I am your jailer nothing more."

Granger didn't respond and Draco got the distinct feeling she was biting her tongue against saying something.

 _That's fine_ , he told himself.

He stepped away from the bedpost, finally feeling stable enough to stand on his own. Draco raised his wand and Hermione flinched but stood firm.

 _The brave little lioness…_

 _Don't Draco, don't go there._

Waving his wand he re-created the chain-charm to keep her captive again only this time he wrapped it around the thickest part of the bed's frame. Even if she worked at it all day he doubted she could saw through that portion of the wood.

She glared at him.

"Don't even think about trying to escape," Draco ordered, the strength in his voice returning.

Hermione barked a laugh.

"Fuck you Malfoy."

"Not a chance Granger. I wouldn't touch you if you were the last woman in the world."

Granger snorted and looked pointedly at his crotch, which made the hard-on he had just moments ago manage to will away, begin to stand back up to attention.

He hated himself for the involuntary reaction and would give anything to prevent it.

"It's called morning wood Granger. It has nothing to do with you."

 _Well that's a lie._

The fact that he was still fighting to tame it had everything to do with her but He wasn't about to admit that. He wanted her mad at him not scared of him.

Last night was the best night's sleep he had, had in weeks and he knew it was because of her, because she had chosen to comfort him after everything he had done to her. Now that he was awake fragments of the nightmare he had been having were coming back to him. He remembered it fading instead of getting worse and knew now that it was because of her...because she had comforted him even as he slept.

 _She is too good for her own good,_ he thought quietly.

Granger had opened her mouth to respond to him and then snapped it back shut.

"You're making me hate you," she finally said, her face twisted in some emotion Draco couldn't name.

"Good," he answered feeling his heart tear a little. "Then the feeling will be mutual." He sounded convincing even to his own ears and he saw something crumple in her face.

She believed he meant it.

It hurt, Merlin it hurt, knowing she could believe it.

Draco hated this house, he hated the Dark Lord and the war and all the bullshit, but he didn't hate her. He could never hate her. And she thought he did…

 _Its' a good thing Draco_

 _I know, that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt like hell._

"Don't fuck up anything in my room or tomorrow I'll make the chain shorter," he warned, barely keeping the emotion out of his voice.

He needed air, he needed to get out of his room and away from her. Just looking at her hurt.

Granger stared at him silently.

"Understand?" he prompted needing an answer and needing the conversation to be over.

"Yes," she said flatly.

"Good," Draco turned, the need to escape gnawing at him.

At the door he neither hesitated nor, looked back, he simply slipped out and slammed the door closed locking it quickly behind him As soon as it closed he leaned back against it a tried to breathe.

He would never forget the feeling of waking up next to her.

Never.

* * *

 **AUTHORS NOTE: I personally am someone who has very vivid dreams and my dreams often are a really go indicator of where my head/heart is actually at verses where I think I am. This is both a blessing and a curse for me, and in this chapter, for Hermione as well. ******Emotions are beginning to get clouded and complicated. In the edits I did by best to make both characters feelings more clear. I hope you enjoy. If you did like it please leave a comment and let me know.****


	14. Chapter 12: The Rediscovery

**Thanks to those who took the time to review the original posting of the chapter:** gpullen, addictedtoloveandfiction, Scorpia11, LillsBills, RoyalBunny, mmiller0000, Kotodashi Kyoshi, inkwolf199, Ame no Uta, Wolfling72 **and** Rouch **And to the Guests:** "Guest" "DramioneDestiny", "Sofia" and "Who" **as well as everyone who has taken the time to review since.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 12: The Rediscovery

Hermione stood staring at the door for several moments after Draco left.

 _He hates me?_ She thought, her mouth turning to a frown. She didn't like how that thought made her chest ache.

 _Why the hell do you care if he hates you?_ She scolded herself, trying to loosen the tightness in her chest with a large steadying breath. _This is DRACO MALFOY. He was right, you were being stupid comforting him._

Even as the voice in her head screamed at her for being so stupid she still found herself mentally circling the same response over and over again:

 _But he…needed me_

The angry voice in her head seemed almost shocked that she dated think such a thing.

 _That's the most stupid thought you have ever had,_ it told her.

Hermione turned away from the door and looked around the room.

"What am I doing here?" she asked the empty space around her. "Why am I still here?"

She was disgusted with herself.

 _You should have escaped already_ , that angry voice inside said. _Now look where you are. You were in bed with that Ferret and you wanted him._

 _No, my body responded to him there is a huge difference_ , She thought defensively.

"I did NOT want him," she said aloud as if speaking would make it true. "We are just clearly chemically comparable and sleeping next to someone who is pheromone-attractive to you induced a physical reaction on both sides. That's all it was," she reasoned.

 _Then explain the dream,_ her mind challenged snidely.

Hermione covered her face rubbing at her eyes with the backs of her palms.

Why had she dreamed of him? Why?

"Arrgh!" she yelled and grabbed a pillow off of the bed throwing it against the wall.

It hit with a soft, less than satisfying thump, and fell to the floor.

The lackluster impact had Hermione's blood boiling further.

She was mad at herself, mad at Draco for being such a pig-headed pureblood idiot, mad at Harry and Ron for not rescuing her already and mad at the world for being so messed up in the first place.

Why hadn't they come yet?

Why hadn't her friends rescued her?

Didn't they care that she was here being tortured every day? Did they think she was dead?

 _They certainly won't think you're dead after that photo_ , she thought to herself and shuddered.

Hermione remembered the pain…and then she remembered how it could have been so much worse...she thought about the kitchen and the conversation she had overheard between Snape and Draco-the conversation Draco still had no idea she had been awake to listen to.

Hermione looked down at her hands. She couldn't remember ever really examining her hands before. Her eyes followed the gentle slope of her fingers down to the oval tips, the little notch by her knuckle of her middle finger on her right hand, that had formed from hours of sitting, gripping a quill and writing.

Hermione had never really valued her hands before...she had never given them much thought. They had always just been there, serving her and helping her get through the day, and now as she looked down at them she realized just how valuable they were to her. She did everything with her hands.

 _He saved your hands,_ the softer side of her mind whispered to her.

 _But he said he hated me..._ she answered back.

 _Are those the actions of someone who hates you?_

Hermione closed her eyes again trying to block out the world.

Her chest tightened gain.

 _Okay, so maybe he only half hates you,_ she reasoned with herself, _that makes sense. Whatever part of him that has feelings for you has put him in a compromising position. If he didn't give a shit about you he would have let you be killed from the start. Instead he's had to deal with flack from all sides because he chose to look out for you...so it makes sense that he would hate you for everything you've put him through just by being here._

Hermione opened her eyes and let out a breath. It felt nice to put things in order in her head.

It was easy if she could just break things down and lay them out. She listed the facts off like bullet points her head:

Draco had some feelings for her.

She knew this to be true because she heard him admit that to Snape.

Those feelings were strong enough to protect her from _some_ things, but not strong enough to make him want to save her for real.

Draco hated her for putting him in the middle of this situation.

He hated her for making him have to decide whether to be 'good' or not.

If she wasn't here at his house as his captive then he could just turn a blind eye and think of no one but himself and his family.

She was making his life difficult.

Her thoughts all lined up nearly like little cars on a train moving from track to track until they made sense. She turned each deduction over in her mind and looked at them feeling satisfied at how they were all linked together in a logical and rational order.

A calm settled down over her and the tightness she had been fighting in her chest eased off.

Draco was not her friend and she needed to keep that in mind.

 _He's a deatheater_ , she reminded herself.

Her thoughts went back to her conversation with Harry after Dumbledore 's death.

Harry had told her that Draco hadn't looked like he was going to go through with killing Dumbledore; that Draco had lowered his wand instead of killing their headmaster.

Snape had killed Dumbledore...and now for some reason Snape was helping her.

 _Snape is only helping you because he made the unbreakable vow to protect and look out for Draco,_ She reminded herself.

Her thoughts went back to her fair-haired jailer.

Why did he have to hate her? All the years in school when he had hated her she had eventually been able to shrug off.

She had written him off as a spoiled bigoted jerk and therefore stopped caring about his opinions on anything. That wasn't so say that his words hadn't hurt from time to time, it was just that she had learned to tune them out.

When she had first met him, before she had realized he was a bigoted ass who hated her by virtue of her linage alone, she had thought that he was cute.

Now Draco was devastatingly handsome, all long limbs and chiseled features, and up until this morning she had thought herself completely immune to that fact.

His personality was rotten enough to sour his looks for her.

Apparently though, her body and mind were not on the same page.

 _It's just chemistry, nothing more_ , she reminded herself.

Still, it made her feel...dirty, her body wanting him. Even thought it was something she had no control over it still felt like a betrayal of herself.

 _What would Ron think knowing you've been in bed with Draco?_ That darkest side of her mind taunted.

No, she didn't want to think about that.

She didn't want to think about the dream either.

Now that she had laid everything out rationally she was slowly becoming aware of why her sleeping mind had painted the picture it had: Ron was supposed to care and supposed to be there and he wasn't. Ron wasn't here for her now and he hadn't even tried to come for her, whereas Draco, had put himself on the line for her for no reason other than basic decency.

Hence her asked Ron for Butter-beer and Draco being the one to deliver it.

 _Alright Freud_ , she thought sarcastically. _Stop psychoanalyzing your own dreams its not going to do you any good right now._

Hermione rubbed her face. The fact that Draco was now a decent human being, made it hurt to have him hate her.

Draco was as smart as her and as witty,. He always had been and if he hadn't been Slytherin and such an asshole they could have been friends.

He had hated her then and he clearly still hated her now.

 _But not enough to just let you die._

 _Basic human decency, nothing more,_ she tried to convince herself, while a part of her knew it was more than that.

She refused to allow that train of thought to continue.

 _He was right in telling me not to map the hero I want onto him._

 _You've never needed a hero before. You should be able to handle this on your own,_ the dark side scolded.

 **"You're making me hate you,"** her own words replayed over in her head and his response:

 _ **"Good, then the feeling will be mutual."**_

A small piece of Hermione had meant what she was saying. His words, his actions, the fact that he wouldn't admit to her that he was trying to look out for her...she hated that, hated that he was keeping her captive, hated that he had tortured her...but she didn't hate _him_. That fact frightened Hermione. A piece of her had feelings for the tortured boy who was risking everything to protect her.

She covered her eyes.

 _You are not going to go all Stockholm syndrome over Draco Malfoy,_ she ordered herself and her thoughts turned, unbidden, to the feel of him next to her. Wrapped around her comforting in sleep.

 _It felt nice._

She shuddered disgusted at herself for having responded even on a physical level.

It was…wrong.

Even if these thoughts could be lined up like the others, knowing where everything was coming from didn't make the truth any easier to deal with.

Hermione felt dirty again and went to the bathroom, needing to wash away the morning and the scent of him on her skin.

Closing the door behind her she stripped down quickly.

With a wave of her hand she turned on the spray and stepped underneath.

* * *

Draco went down stairs to make Granger breakfast.

Even if he was hurt and mad at her he wasn't about to take it out on her and let her starve.

It was his fault anyways if she was mad or lashing out so he couldn't really hold it against her.

 _You basically told her you hated her_ , he reminded himself.

 _She said it first,_ he mentally answered back.

The pain and tightness in Draco's chest showed no signs of lessening. He felt anxiety through the bind and for a moment it was almost reassuring to know that he wasn't alone in his feelings.

 _You're an ass through and through Mafloy, just because you're hurting doesn't mean she should be too. She's been through enough._

He turned the corner in to the kitchen and halted in his tracks.

His aunt and the Dark Lord were sitting in the middle of the kitchen enjoying a meal.

With a glance at the clock Draco realized he had slept in far later than he had planned.

 _Shit..._

"Draco Darling, why don't you join us for a bite?" Bellatrix asked then turned to Voldemort. "If my Lord approves."

"Of course," said Voldemort. "I am after all a guest in this house," he smiled, the flesh around his mouth pulling tight. "Come sit my boy."

Draco sat, accepting the invitation, knowing that he couldn't rightly refuse without it coming across poorly.

Voldemort commenting on his status as a guest had Draco wanting to sneer. Guests were supposed to leave at some point. In Draco's mind Voldemort had overstayed his welcome the moment he put a toe inside their threshold.

Draco's skin crawled as Bellatrix fawned over the Dark Lord.

He knew his aunt had always been drawn to power and purity and Voldemort extolled the virtues of both. It made sense that she was drawn to him, however Voldemort usually paid Bellatrix only the faintest of attention as his favorite. At the moment he appeared interested in her in a much more carnal way.

Draco shuddered at the thought of the two of them together.

Lucius and Narcissa entered the kitchen a moment later.

His mother looked her usual elegant self-only the the lines around her eyes spoke to Draco telling him she had not slept well last night.

His father looked how he always did these days: tired and worn.

They sat at the table and Narcissa waved her wand setting out a glorious meal before everyone.

Draco filled his plate and began eating without much thought as to the taste.

Around him tightly leashed conversation and pleasantries filled the air.

 _Well isn't this just a cute little family breakfast,_ thought Draco sarcastically.

He caught his mother's eyes and she looked away quickly, obviously still disturbed from his actions last night.

 _She's less than us. Not equal. Not worth getting upset over... or don't you remember telling me that mother_? He glowered.

Draco looked around the table.

He no longer felt like he was a part of his own family.

 _When did that happen?_ he wondered.

A part of him desperately wanted to reach out to his mother. To confide in her as he had so many times before...but that had gotten harder and harder as the Dark Lord had become a larger part of their lives. As Voldemort's shadow over them grew the closeness between Draco and his mother had waned.

He missed her.

Narcissa had always been there for her, no matter what he had been able to rely on her fierce love and protections.

The rift between them made him feel more lost than before he had sat down at the table.

An odd movement caught Draco's eyes and he looked over as his father tucked his hands under the table poured a dose of whisky into his coffee cup with a shaking hands. Lucius was trying to be discrete and hide it from the table, but in turning away from Narcissa's eyes he had given Draco full view of the action.

Lucius looked up at Draco and then away, ashamed.

 _What a fucking mess this is..._ thought Draco angrily.

Draco's skin was crawling wanting to get away from them all.

As soon as the opportunity presented itself Draco excused himself from the table and went down to his potions lab.

He didn't even bother to try and make anything, knowing it would be hopeless today.

As he reached for a book of potions from the shelf he caught Granger's scent on his shirt and froze.

Against his better judgement he inhaled closing his eyes.

The memory of her in his arms all soft limbs crashed into him and he felt his body begin to respond.

His eyes snapped open.

 _You shouldn't think of her like that,_ he told himself.

He couldn't help it though. She was all he could think about. That little whiff of her scent was tantalizing him. Temping him to give into fantasy and re-imagine what it was life to hold her body close to his own.

Draco slammed the book in his hands against the counter with a loud thud and grabbed a chair raking the legs with a screeching sound over the floor.

 _No_ , he ordered himself, _you will **not** entertain thoughts of her like that._

He dropped himself down into the chair and began pouring over his notes with a vigor usually reserved for the night before finals.

He needed to distract himself and this was the easiest way.

* * *

"Hey Malfoy!" Vincent Crabbe's voice jolted Draco from deep study several hours later "Was looking all over for you. You're mum said you'd be down here."

"What are you doing here?" asked Draco with an edge to his tone. Despite the hours of studying he was in no better of a mood then when he had started. True the submersion into the book had helped keep his mind pre-occupied so he didn't dwell on what what bothering him, but it also didn't resolve anything.

"Is that any way to greet your friend?" asked Crabbe in mock, pain. The gesture only irritated Draco further.

"Shove off Crabbe. What are you doing here?" he asked back.

Crabbe pouted, this time genuine in his emotions.

"My dad's here on business. I asked to come along," he answered his tone sulking.

 _Don't be a prick Draco, he'll think somethings up,_ the wary voice in Draco's head ordered.

 _You're always a prick to Crabbe and Goyle it's not like he'll notice a difference,_ was his argued response.

 _Stellar example of wizarding kind you are._

"Yeah alright then, well good to see you I suppose," Draco said lamely.

"Make a friend feel right at home why don't you," Crabbe half teased coming around to Draco's side of the table. "I, uh... heard you had Granger here," said Crabbe leaning in as if sharing a secret.

"What of it?" asked Draco defensively.

The last thing that Draco needed was the added complication of Vincent Crabbe wanting to see and play with Hermione Granger.

 _There is not a chance in hell I am allowing the two of the them in the same room,_ he thought angrily, _especially not today. She needs a goddammed break after last night._

Draco needed a break too, though It seemed like he wasn't going to catch one anytime soon.

Seeing your friends was supposed to be a good thing, but Crabbe was not the kind of friend that Draco could confide him. Crabbe was not even the kind of friend that Draco even really enjoyed spending time with. Crabbe was the kind of friend that his parents approved of. The kind of friend that brought connections and came from a good 'pure' family.

 _You don't have any friends who aren't that,_ though Draco darkly. _You don't have any friends you can trust._

The thought made Draco feel suddenly...lonely.

"You-who" Crabbe waved his hand in front of Draco's face.

"What?" asked Draco swatting away Crabbe's hand. He had been lost in thought and knew he had probably missed whatever Crabbe had been saying.

"Can I see her?" Crabbe sounded far too excited about the situation for Draco to be anything less than disgusted.

"Fuck off. Did you come here for me or to gawk at my prize?" asked Draco hiding his disgust behind the cocky comeback.

"Maybe a little of both," answered Crabbe with a shrug.

"Well you can suck it on the latter," said Draco. "She's mine," his voice sounded possessive even to his own ears.

"Oh come on Malfoy," Crabbe wined. "What's the fun in having a toy if you don't play with it?"

"I do play," he lied. "I just don't share."

At least that statement was constant with how Draco had always been. Crabbe didn't seem at all surprised by his response and yet he still continued on.

"Well you should show her off you know. Could be fun to just watch." Crabbe's words had Draco resisting the urge to sneer.

 _You need to calm down and change the subject before you loose your cool,_ he ordered himself and tried to brighten his tone.

"My mother made some cheesecake for dessert last night. Why don't we go mow down on some of that and we can catch up. I got your owl about the girl?"

It had turned Draco's stomach a little to read about his friends conquest of the underage girl but he was willing to talk about anything to keep Granger of the radar.

He walked to the stairs and Crabbe followed.

"It's strawberry," added Draco lamely.

"Awwww, yeah." Crabbe nodded. "Imma lick the strawberry sauce off the top of that cheesecake like I licked her sweet-"

"Merlin Crabbe! Don't say anything like that within earshot of my mother or she will cuff you for it."

Crabbe laughed.

"No worries. I know how to handle myself around your mum," Crabbe puffed out his chest. "She loves me."

 _No, she doesn't,_ thought Draco peeved that Crabbe would suggest his mother would like him when right now she didn't even like Draco. S _he just puts up with you because of who your parents are and the fact that we are somewhat related._ His mother appreciated image and manners too much for her to like anyone who wasn't athletically beautiful or at the very least socially graced. Crabbe did not qualify as either.

Draco looked sideways at his companion as he led the heavier boy to the kitchen.

 _He would never risk his neck to try and come to save you_ , thought Draco.

 _What does it say about you that no one but your own mother would risk it all for you and yet Granger has at least half a dozen who would for her?_

Draco knew what it said about him.

All his life he had been told that he was special, better.

Now, sitting back watching his so-called-friend stuff his face with cheesecake and gloat about underage conquests Draco came to the conclusion that he wasn't special.

 _He_ wasn't worth saving.

The woman up in his room... who had inspired him to do something, to stand up for once and to risk it all... was the one who was truly special.

 _ **She** deserves to be saved._

 _And when her friends come to save her you know what you have to do in order to make it so she can stay safe and stay saved, don't you?_

 _Yes,_ he answered back silently.

There was only one way that he could protect his family and Granger at the same time.

There was only one solution would make it so that his parents would be reassured, instead of punished by the Dark Lord.

Draco had to make it seem like it wasn't his choice to betray the cause.

He had to keep his family safe and make it seem like he was still loyal.

When Granger's friends came to take her back, and he knew they would soon, Draco would have to let them take him too...

...as their prisoner.

* * *

Hermione wrapped a towel around herself and looked in the mirror. She wiped away the steam with the side of her hand.

Her face looked fine, there was no sign of the previous night's torture.

As she examined her reflection she realized she was losing weight.

It had only been around two weeks, if her count was correct, but those weeks had clearly taken their toll on her.

Draco hadn't brought her breakfast today and she wondered if he was trying to hammer in the point that he was her only lifeline here.

 _You need to get out of here,_ she told herself.

 _If you run they'll make him follow you._

 _So?_ She thought beck. _Even him following...even that will help your friends-at least that way the Dark Lord will be distracted._

 _Or Voldemort might get tired and kill you..._

Hermione turned away from the mirror.

She knew what was really keeping her from trying to run now: It was the idea that Draco might be tortured if she did.

Did he care for her enough to get hurt like that or did he hate her enough that he would lead them to her willingly?

 _He came to fetch you last time, he'll do it again._

A part of her didn't want to take that chance.

She turned to her pile of clothes and went to put them in the hamper, knowing they would be clean within a few minutes thanks to the joys of magic.

A sock fell from the pile and when Hermione went to pick it up a small square of paper slipped out from inside it and skidded across the floor.

Hermione frowned. She didn't remember tucking anything into her sock.

She dumped her clothes unceremoniously in the hamper and returned to the piece of paper lifting it delicately and placing it in the center of her palm.

It was worn and a little damp.

Clearly it had come from her sock, and based on the condition she deduced it had been there for a while.

 _How did I not notice it before?_ She wondered.

 _You were kind of running for your life…_ her mind answered back.

She turned it over in her hands.

The note was folded how she had always folded her notes in class back in grade school, before Hogwarts, before she had learned magical folds.

 _That's...very odd,_ she thought to herself.

Carefully she unfolded the note.

 _ **Granger, I'm sorry for last night...**_

Hermione took in the words and suddenly the water droplets on her skin felt as cold as ice.

Her head started to pound.

She recognized what was clearly Draco's handwriting on the note and she doubted very much that he had put it inside her sock without her noticing.

Which meant she had put it there.

She couldn't remember doing that though...which meant...

Her heart started pounding and her mind raced.

Her stomach dropped.

 _The other morning you couldn't find your hanger, and the waste basket had been emptied..._ She thought. _  
_

There was only one logical explanation:

Someone had oblivated her.

 _Draco..._

Her breathing became erratic to the point of near hyperventilation.

 _Why?_

She shook her head. She knew the answer:

To protect her like she had protected her parents.

It didn't matter, he had stolen her memories.

Why?

What had happened?

Had he used her?

Had Greyback come back?

Worries shot rapid fire through her brain.

She couldn't remember what she had lost so she couldn't know for sure what had happened.

Hermione turned to the toilet and dry heaved.

Nothing came up because there was nothing there.

By the time she finished spitting out what little bile had come up, she was shaking and trembling.

What had she lost?

What had he taken?

How long had she been here?

How many times had he used the spell on her?

 _You did the same to your parents..._ her mind whispered softly.

 _This is different..._

 _How is it different?_

 _Because My parents aren't wondering what had happened to them and if someone had used of violated them then made them forget._

She had to get out.

Suddenly all the consequences seemed inconsequential.

Hermione grabbed back her dirty clothes hauling them back.

She didn't care their condition, she wasn't about to wear anything of Draco's now.

She ran into the bedroom searching for anything to help her escape-anything to break the chain or the headboard.

 _Where will you go?_ the question came loud in her mind.

 _Somewhere,_ She answered back _, anywhere that isn't here._

There came a knock at the door and Hermione froze.

Draco didn't knock.

The door knob rattled and Hermione stepped backwards instinctively. It rattled again and then stopped. She heard the utterance of 'Alohomora' through the door and ran to her pallet reaching for the knife hidden there. Her bottom was up in the air when she heard a voice behind her.

"Well isn't that a great view," came a voice and Hermione looked up to see Crabbe leering down at her. "I can see why Malfoy wants you all to himself."

"Crabbe!" Hermione scurried to her feet hiding the knife at her back.

"Hello Mudblood," he said, his chubby cheeks dimpling with what, under other circumstances, would be called a goofy smile.

"What are you doing in Draco's room?" asked Hermione, trying to keep her voice calm.

There was something about the look in Crabbe's eyes that had Hermione shivering inside.

 _You can't let him know you're afraid._

"Does he know you are here?" She asked her voice even.

Crabbe shrugged dismissively.

"The Dark Lord wanted to see him about something. He'll likely be distracted for a bit," he answered.

"You shouldn't be here. He'll be mad," Hermione warned. She knew that at least, was true and prayed that Crabbe would hear the truth in her words and be wary enough to care.

Instead Crabbe laughed.

"He sure has gotten you scared hasn't he? No more miss 'Better than everyone else,'" Crabbe sneered and reached for her.

Hermione sidestepped.

"Don't touch me," she ordered.

"Oh come on, I won't hurt you. I just want a little feel."

Goosebumps jumped to attention all up and down Hermione's arms.

"Keep your hands off me Crabbe or I swear to God I'll tell Draco what you've done," her voice was angry and harsh. Her emotions were all out of wack from having found the note, she didn't want to deal with anything or anyone else, she just wanted to run and she wasn't about to let Vincent Crabbe paw at her.

"And you think he'll do anything about that?" Crabbe raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

"Yes," she stuck up her chin. "He doesn't like sharing."

"That's true He did say that," Crabbe nodded. "But the thing is..." he lunged at her grabbing her as she turned to run. "I don't care." He wrapped his big meaty arms around her and stuck his hands on her chest. "Those are pert little things aren't they?" he said in a darkly appreciative tone squeezing her breasts.

Hermione swung back with the paring knife and Crabbe let out a howl as it sunk into the flesh of his upper thigh. He released her abruptly.

"You fucking bitch!" he cried grabbing at his leg.

Hermione turned and punched him square in the face the blow landing with a round crunch on his nose. She felt the bones break against her knuckles and Crabbe landed on his ass on the floor.

Hermione darted towards him and put the knife to his throat.

"Your wand!" she demanded. "Give me your wand."

Crabbe howled in pain and she reached in his robes herself.

The ruckus would have someone coming for her, she knew she only had moments.

 _You need to get out of here._

Her fingers closed around the wand and she grabbed hold of it tightly pointing it at Crabbe.

"Stupify," she cast quickly and then turned to the door. She waved the wand and it closed "Colloportus," she cried locking it.

Faintly, she heard voices from downstairs moving closer. She turned the wand on the chain and cast several spells in quick succession until one finally freed her ankle from its hold.

The door flew open.

Hermione turned, ready to face whoever was there, grasping Crabbe's wand in her hand.

It was the face of her captor, her jailer and her savoir.

Draco's face was etched with fear and a part of Hermione wondered if it was on her behalf.

He looked down at Crabbe and then to her.

He ran towards her hand outstretched...reaching for her not with firing wand but open hand and pleading eyes.

She wanted so much to give in to those eyes.

 _You can't trust him._

Hermione shook her head and Apparated.

* * *

 **Thanks very much for reading, please let me know what you think of this chapter in a quick review before moving on to the next one. Cheers.**


	15. Chapter 13: The Chase

**This chapter was originally a bonus update thanks to the reviews of:** Lightning princess, Wolfling72, tomfeltonswifey, Lanigra25, inkwolf199, alluringmango, Addfam2008, gpullen, addictedtoloveandfiction, Ea Hiraku, RoyalBunny, KiaMinaya, Greenti, -Chan, TamaeKurogane, ChildofBrisingr, EndlessReign and Scorpia11 **Thanks also go out to the guests** "Who" **and** "Zoltar0921" **As well as everyone else who has taken the time to review since.  
**

 *****Authors note on cannon: There is not a ton of info on (Vincent Crabbe's father) only that he is a death eater and dies at some point I believe in the Deathly hollows final battle. I tried to imagine who someone like Crabbe would have for a father and then wrote that.**

 ** ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned****

* * *

Chapter 13: The Chase

 _No…_

Draco's fingers brushed air as he watched Hermione swirl and vanish before his eyes. He stumbled forward with the momentum of running to her and wrapped his arms around the thick portion of his bedpost instead of her body.

 _She's gone..._

Draco felt the loss wrench through him.

 _Where will she go?_

 _Will she be okay?_

He squeezed his eyes tightly shut.

 _They'll make me find her._

Shock and fear at her loss gave way to anger and he straightened.

Hermione had gotten the wand to apparate from Crabbe. Crabbe who had gone into Draco's room without his permission after Draco had expressly told Crabbe that Granger was not to be shared or played with.

 _You bastard_ , Draco growled mentally. He whirled on the heavier boy and pulled out his wand pointing it at Vincent's throat.

"What the hell did you do?" Draco demanded.

"Please!" Crabbe cried.

Draco shoved him backwards and Crabbe cried out, his hand dropping briefly form his nose.

Draco saw the bloody evidence that Granger had broken it.

For a split second Draco felt a brief flicker of pride at Hermione sticking up for herself and then that feeling gave way to another emotion, one that was much darker and left him wondering what the hell Crabbe had done to warrant the broken nose from Hermione?

 _It could be that she just wanted to escape,_ The part of him that hoped she hadn't had to endure anything more tried to argue for an explanation that didn't make him want to kill his 'friend' even while the rational side of his mind knew why Crabbe had come up to his room.

 _You're the one who keeps pushing her away,_ another voice said.

 _To protect her,_ he argued back to himself.

 _She doesn't know that._

 _"_ Stop pointing that thing at me would you?" blubbered Crabbe pulling Draco away from the argument in his head.

"What the hell did you do Crabbe?" Draco Demanded, turning his focus to the boy in front of him.

 _What did you do to her?_

Crabbe reached down for his leg and Draco saw the growing bloodstain there.

Hermione punching Crabbe in the nose to escape made sense, stabbing him meant that Crabbe had done something worse.

 _If you hurt her I'll end you._

"Nothin' I was just having a bit of fun," Crabbe blubbered.

 _A bit of fun? I'll show you what I've been doing for 'fun' lately…_

A curse started in Draco's throat halting at the sound of Lucius voice behind them.

"What's going on in here?" his father asked, in a quavering voice.

Draco froze for a moment, holding Crabbe still and fighting to keep his lips sealed.

If he hurt Crabbe now he could not rely on his father for any support. Lucius would throw him to the wrath of Vincent's father or worse the Dark Lord.

Draco glanced back at the door where is father stood holding one of the old family wands. Lucius trying to shake the hair from his face and it ended up looking more like a twitch than the condescending gesture it had once been.

Fighting against his own desires Draco lowered his wand.

"Relax," Draco ordered Crabbe in a low growl glaring at the chubby boy with venom in his eyes. He straightened and brushed Crabbe's shoulder off ostentatiously before stepping back.

"What in the bloody hell happened here?" asked Mr. Crabbe following shortly after Lucius.

"The mudblood," Vincent Crabbe cried moving away from Draco timidly. "She stabbed me and broke my nose." Crabbe hobbled over to his father who examined the damage.

"I'll kill that filthy whore." Mr. Crabbe growled. "I'll kill her."

"No you won't," said Narcissa pushing past everyone else and making her way into the space between Draco and the Crabbes.

 _She's defending Granger? Why?_ Shock rang through Draco at her words. Looking at the faces of the others in the room Draco could tell that he was not alone in his surprise.

 _What is your angle mother?_ He wondered silently.

 _It doesn't matter, what matters is...keeping Hermione safe._

"What do you mean telling me what I can and cannot do to a filthy little mudblood?!" demanded Mr. Crabbe.

"The dark Lord wants her alive and as bait," countered Narcissa the epitome of cool and collected. Draco was mildly impressed at the show of unflappable calm and authority.

"They don't need to _know_ we offed her," said Crabbe senior. "Accidents happen."

 _Not to her_ , thought Draco, _not while I'm breathing._

Draco had no intention of standing by and letting a light like Hermione's get snuffed out by Mr. Crabbe's dirty hands.

He was going to save her.

If it was the last thing that he did Draco was going to save her.

Even if it meant handing himself over to the order to save his family at the same time.

"Rumors spread," answered Narcissa flatly bringing Draco back to the current moment and surprising Draco once again with her defense of Granger. "And we both know that some people are better adept at keeping things secret than others."

Draco didn't know what incident involving Mr. Crabbe his mother was referring to but whatever it was she was hinting at, had Mr. Crabbe shutting his mouth and looking away.

 _Clearly my mother has dirt on them_ , thought Draco, wondering what could be bad enough to silence Crabbe so completely.

 _Your mother has dirt on everyone,_ his mind answered back. _Its why she is so good at playing the game._

Draco didn't care what that dirt was, he was just happy to have Mr. Crabbe deterred from killing Granger.

Narcissa turned to her son, raising her chin and Draco felt the power of her gaze.

Once more Narcissa was acting like a queen within her realm. Clearly she had recovered from her earlier distress at seeing her son turn his wand on Granger and was now back in control in that way that made everyone wary and eager to obey or get out of the way.

Narcissa looked down at Draco.

"You had better go find her and bring her back before the Dark Lord has time to grow angry at _**you**_ for letting her get away," she said and then looked at Vincent Crabbe "Either of **_you_** ," she said pointedly letting Crabbe know with her eyes and tone who she deemed responsible for Granger's escape. "Now, if you'll come along we can get you fixed up," she touched Crabbe's shoulder while her eyes flickered over to her son.

Draco saw the warning in them.

 _Bring her back,_ Narcissa's eyes ordered.

It was clear that his mother was not going to tolerate anything but her will being done in this situation.

Draco gripped his wand tightly.

 _You could just run away with Granger…_ his mind offered.

Draco's eyes went to his father. Lucius' hand was trembling by his side while the other smoothed out his frazzled hair.

At this point if he had to choose between his father and Granger he would choose Granger-which was a scary thought to the Slytherin who had been taught family and blood were the most important things in the world.

He looked at his father.

Once he had been terrified of the man.

Afraid of a wrath that no one else knew.

Afraid of the cane.

Afraid...of disappointing him.

Now he could care less if he lived up to the expectations of a man who had chosen to follow the dark Lord.

Then Draco's eyes flickered to his mother. An image of her laying dead at Voldemort's feet came to his mind.

 _No_ , he shook his head.

She hadn't chosen to follow the Dark Lord.

Narcissa had never taken on the dark Mark.

She was loyal to her family, but she didn't see Voldemort as the savior and answer to all their problems, not like his father had

Draco closed his eyes. He couldn't…wouldn't be responsible for his mother's death and if he ran Voldemort would kill her…or worse kill his father and keep her as an example.

Narcissa was a beautiful, elegant respected woman among her peers…she would be the perfect living example of what could happen if you went against the Dark Lord.

His mother was the reason why he planned to let the order take him when they came to rescue Hermione.

He would risk torture for his mother because he knew she would not hesitate to do the same for him.

Even when she was mad at him he knew that his mother loved him and had his back.

"I will bring her back," said Draco giving his mother the briefest of nods.

 _You have to do this_ , he told himself.

Draco shuddered and took a deep breath. He stepped back from the rest of the people in the room, closed his eyes and visualizing Granger he apparated.

* * *

The lightning spell soared past clipping Draco's ear with a burning pain as he landed feet first.

He was standing on the other side of his parents woods, at the top of the cliff just above where he had found her last time.

Granger had obviously chose this place for a reason.

She had been waiting for him wand at the ready.

The wind caught Hermione hair and blew it outward. Standing there on the edge of the cliff looking like an angry goddess.

While Draco stood with his back to the woods he couldn't help admiring the strength he saw in front of him.

She looked magnificent, powerful, beautiful and... wildly out of control.

"Don't follow me!" Granger yelled to him,the order backed by a tone of authority.

She struck out again with perfect flick of the wrist.

Even if Draco had been ready for the attack he would have had trouble blocking it. The spell hit Draco in the chest and he flew backwards through the air.

Time slowed for Draco as he flew backward and he watched as Hermione swirled, a final spell flew from her wand just before she popped out of his view. And then Draco's body slammed into the tree behind him and her spell hit his chest directly after paralyzing him.

* * *

By the time Hermione's spell wore off the sun was lower in the horizon.

"Dammit Granger," he got up and reached a hand out to steady himself against the tree. Draco grabbed his pounding head. He had cracked it pretty hard against the tree, not quite hard enough to black out, but hard enough that it hurt like hell. He blinked and when he pulled his hand back he saw blood. "Bloody hell." Draco snarled and set his jaw.

 _That fucking hurts._

Thinking of Granger again he apparated again.

This time he found himself underground on a subway platform.

He looked around him through the crowd. Across the tracks he saw Granger.

Her eyes met him across the tracks hot and angry.

She turned and ran just as a train came flying through the station.

He watched her between passing cars as she vanished.

Draco glanced at the large sign saying the time and winced.

The red numbers's confirmed his worse fears: They had been gone too long.

The Dark lord would absolutely have noticed her absence by now.

 _Fuck._

"Sir are you alright?" a plain looking young woman with dark hair asked pointing at his forehead with concern.

"Not hardly," Draco answered then caught himself gentling his tone "I'll be fine," he said and turned on the charm. "Just a knock about. Could you point me in the direction of the loo?"

"It's just behind you," she said pointing to a sign.

"Thank you," he said with a smile and nod.

"Are you sure you're alright?" she asked reaching out and touching his arm.

Two weeks ago he would have yanked himself away.

Two weeks ago he would have told her to mind her own business.

Two weeks ago was before Granger... before her kindness.

"I'll be fine, really," he assured her and touched the woman's hand lightly. "It's okay, you don't have to worry about me."

Her shoulders seemed to relax believing him and she gave a small smile back before disappearing into the crowd.

As soon as the woman was out of view Draco hurried to the washroom. He made a bee-line to the sink and glanced in the mirror.

No wonder the woman had been concerned.

There was blood soaked through a good quarter of his white-blond hair and a little coming off a cut in his brow.

Draco shook his head, he gave a quick glance around and then waved his wand cleaning himself up.

 _Dammit Granger,_ he mentally snarled.

Draco turned and tucked himself into a stall where no one would see, held his breath and apparated.

The sun was setting through the trees of the forbidden forest by Hogwarts.

 _She had to pick here,_ Draco lamented mentally.

His skin crawled.

There was not a good memory to be had for him in this place and the fact that it was getting dark made everything worse. He wished he could delay the setting of the sun.

It was one thing to be in the forest at twilight it was another to be there after Dark.

Nothing good happened here after dark.

Draco _felt_ Hermione before he heard her.

"I knew you would follow me," she said angrily.

Draco turned round to face her only to be greeted with a wand close enough to make him go cross eyed looking at it.

"What are you doing?" Draco asked shaking his head. "Point that thing somewhere else would you?"

"Not a chance," snapped Granger. "I told you not to follow me."

"You just said you knew I would."

"But I hoped you wouldn't."

Draco let out a breath through his nose.

"Why are you making me do this?" he asked.

"I'm not making you do anything," she answered.

"Yes you are!" he yelled. "Why couldn't you just stay! I could have tried to keep you off the radar. Instead when you get back the Crabbe's are going to want to see you suffer for what you did. You put a knife through Vincent's leg and broke his bloody nose."

"He put his hands on me Draco what did you want me to do? Just stand there are take it? Let him do whatever he wants to me?!" Hermione yelled.

Draco stiffened.

 _Put his hands on her..._

"What did he do?" Draco's voice dropped low.

"He... It doesn't matter." Granger shook her head.

"Yes it does!" Draco shouted back.

 _I'll kill him, I'll fucking kill him._

"Well I don't want to talk to you about what someone else did to my body without my permission when I can't even trust that you haven't done the same."

"What?!" Draco's eyes widened and his temper bubbled to the surface _._

 _How could she…. How dare she even think that?_

He stalked forward.

"Say that again," he demanded.

Hermione kept the wand raised and pointed at Draco's face.

He didn't care.

Draco walked forward as if it wasn't there at all. He didn't bother to raise his own wand in response either, just backed her against the nearest tree and glared into her eyes.

"Say it again," he growled and then waited her answer.

He needed to hear her say it: accuse him of hurting her so he could deny it afresh or have her admit she knew the truth.

He needed to know she knew he would never hurt her like that.

Never.

* * *

"I can't know what you have and haven't done if I can't remember what's been done to me!" Hermione tried to yell the words coming out quieter in the shadow of his anger.

She saw pain flicker through his eyes and vanish beneath the rage.

She had never seen this tone to his anger, it was different...it felt more dangerous.

"You look me in the eyes and tell me if you think that I would ever do something like that to you," he demanded and she locked eyes with him at his order. She looked into those eyes so fierce and so hard and…there was something else in them, something she couldn't place.

Her mind went back to the night that he had saved her from Greyback and his words:

 _"I am nothing like him...I would never..."_

Looking into his eyes now she knew what he had said then was still true now.

"You wouldn't," she said and her face crumpled.

 _He wouldn't do that, but that doesn't mean someone else wouldn't.  
_

 _It doesn't mean that he didn't cover it up or make it go away._

She needed to know. She needed to ask even though she dreaded the answer.

Hermione met his eyes again.

"Someone else could have," she said flatly and then swallowed getting up the nerve to ask. "Draco, what don't I remember? Who took my memory?"

"What are you talking about?" he asked, but his eyes flickered away from her.

He was hiding something and she knew it.

"No more lies Draco," she said softly. "Please..."

He looked back at her and she could see all the pain etched in lines on his face-like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"Draco..." she hesitated. Should she tell him she knew?

 _Yes, if you want him to be honest with you, you have to be honest with him._

 _No, it's your only protection now, you need to keep it to yourself._

 _I need the truth more than I need the protection._

It wasn't logical or rational, but she needed to know. _  
_

"I heard your conversation with Snape in the kitchen,"said Hermione.

She saw the shock on Draco's face. His worry began meshing with denial.

"No, you were out cold," he said shaking his head.

"Physically, yes. I couldn't move. Couldn't even open my eyes, but I heard everything."

She watched him crumple, like a deck of cards folding in on itself.

"You aren't supposed to know. I can't protect you if you know."

"You think I can't keep a secret?" she demanded, suddenly angry once more. "Who do you think I am? Some pansy little girl who needs protection?! THAT'S NOT ME DRACO, I am not some helpless little waif!" she lashed out with her wand sending Draco flying backwards.

He recovered and blocked her next attack.

"I never said you were helpless," he countered.

"You're treating me like I am," she flung out a spell "You saw me with your aunt. I never gave up the truth about the sword."

"That's my aunt..." Draco ducked a spell and rolled.

Hermione would have been impressed if she wasn't so pissed at him.

"The Dark Lord...he...he sees more. If he saw in your eyes that you trusted me...that you were looking at me with any less than hate or fear..." said Draco.

"Fuck you Malfoy. You should have trusted I could handle it." She sent out a giant blast from the wand cracking a tree in half and sending it toppling down.

"Merlin Granger you are going to get us both caught out here."

"Like I care! You're already trying to take me back to them!"

"Because I have to!" he shot back with another parry on her attack.

Granger growled.

"Like a good little dog dragging back a lost bone to its master," the venom in her words was real. All the anger she felt at having her memory taken was outweighing the knowledge that he cared for her at all.

 _He still wants to take you back, he can't care for you much at all if he isn't even hesitating in returning you._

"Fight me dammit!" she demanded.

She could feel the wand in her hand bowing, not quite able to channel the power inside her. This wasn't her wand and Hermione wasn't sure how much more she could cast through it before it broke. She may have won its loyalty but wands choose wizards and this was a wand that would never have chosen her.

"The hell do you think I've been doing?!" Asked Draco.

"Dodging and parrying both my attacks and my questions!" she shot back and this time her attack made it though. She watched him fly backwards and slam into the nearest tree. She marched over to him and pointed the wand down at his face.

"The truth Draco," she demanded looking down at him. "Who took my memory?"

He looked up at her, his eyes tortured.

He didn't answer.

She knew the truth; she could see it in his eyes.

 _Please, I don't want it to be him who stole my memories from me..._

"Tell me!" she demanded her voice cracking.

Draco shook his head.

Tears formed in her eyes and she lashed out cursing him.

The sound of his pain in her ears hurt her heart.

She heard the wand crack in her hand and knew it was now dead and useless to her.

She backed away from Draco, keeping the wand raised a false shield in front of her.

Draco looked at her and she saw that the pain in his eyes wasn't from her curse but from the fact that _she_ had chosen to actually curse him.

How could he bear it?

How could he hurt her if he cared?

She barely cared for him and hearing the sound of his pain had torn at her.

How could he suffer it?

Did he care at all? Or…did he care so much that he bore that pain for her?

Granger's mind was stumbled over itself. She didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to think about anything anymore.

She just wanted to go home.

"Please…" she almost whispered. She knew he heard her, saw her plea reach him in a way her curse hadn't. Saw the crack open in the wall he had placed between them.

It was obvious he didn't want to answer her, didn't want to admit the truth to her. She saw it warring within him, saw the fact that she had asked so quietly instead of demanding alter him from his constant state of defense to one of vulnerability.

 _You are his weak spot. You are his vulnerability._

 _What does that mean?_

Draco swallowed and opened his mouth answering her. Her heart broke at his admission:

"I did."

* * *

 **That's all for now folks, I hope you enjoyed that bonus update. Anyone coming back on the re-read notice the small difference in this updated version ;) ? Hope you like it.** **Please review and let me know if you liked how I did the chase scene and battle between the two of them. Your feedback is always super appreciated.**


	16. Chapter 14: The Forbidden Forest

**A big thank you to:** alluringmango, Rouch, Addfam2008, ElizW85, Wolfling72, ChildofBrisingr, KiaMinaya, roon0, Ayr, Scorpia11, Catsy27, addictedtoloveandfiction, NadzKers12 and TamaeKurogane **as well as the** Guest **and everyone else who has taken the time to review since. Your reviews are always appreciated more than you know**

 ***Trigger Warning: This story contains Violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation, torture etc. I do not want anyone hurt by my writing so please if you can't handle those things then do not read.**

* * *

Chapter 14: The Forbidden Forest

Draco saw Hermione's face fall at his words. He hated himself for having hurt her in this way when all he was trying to do was keep her from harm.

This was an unnecessary pain.

 _How would you feel_? He found himself asking.

He didn't know how to answer that.

Draco couldn't fathom how it would feel to be in her shoes, to know someone had taken time from him, but not know that had happened.

 _She was never supposed to know,_ he protested.

 _You can make her forget this and it will be like she never found out…_

 _Look at how it hurt her, I don't want to cause her unnecessary pain._

 _That's the whole reason why you cast the obliviate in the first place: to save her from more pain._

 _And once again trying to play the hero only made things worse._

"What happened Malfoy?" Hermione asked holding her wand pointing it straight at him.

He wasn't afraid of her cringing him again; that had hurt like hell but also felt like justice.

No, it was the plea in her voice that had him answering.

"Nothing," he answered. _Nothing like you are worried happened. Nothing in comparison to what could have or would have happened if the Dark Lord had seen the kindness in your eyes while looking at me…_

"Bullshit!" she yelled and stepped forward, instead of hexing him she shoved at his chest with both hands.

"That's Bullshit Malfoy. You wouldn't have done it for no reason." She shoved him again. "Tell me the truth goddamn it! What the fuck happened?!" her hands collided with his chest a third time, this time there was some wandless magic behind the shove and he fell back on his ass six feet from her.

The snapping of twigs caught Draco's attention and his head whipped around in time to see a dark haired death eater point his wand at Granger. With a flick of his wrist the death eater sent Crabbe's wand flying out of Granger's hands. He caught it and glanced at it curiously then tossed it away.

"What have we here?" The death eater smiled. "Pretty lady in the woods?" he barely spared Malfoy a glance obviously considering him an ally and not worth attention. The Deatheater probably thought Draco would thank him later or share in the spoils. The man raised his wand to attack Granger and Draco lashed out with a stupify and jumping to his feet to his feet.

Granger took one look at him and the fallen death eater and bolted deeper into the forbidden forest as the last few inches of sun disappeared over the horizon colouring the view in a twilight haze.

"Granger!" Draco called out after her. She didn't answer. "Dammit Granger," he said lowly and went to the death eater on the ground. The man was still dazed and very much out of it. Draco grabbed the wizard's wand from his hand and cast an obliviate. He didn't need anyone going to the dark lord whining about how Draco Malfoy had attacked them in order to protect the woman who was supposed to be his prisoner.

She was without a wand running through the forbidden forest.

 _Idiot_ , he mentally shook his head.

 _She probably thinks it's safer for her here,_ his mind countered.

 _Yes well, it may be safer for her here, giants and spiders like her, but you're going to get yourself killed and dragged off by some mythical creature and eaten._

Draco looked at the rapidly darkening woods and swallowed.

He was genuinely afraid of what the dark forest would do to him. Nothing good ever came from the forest. He would never admit it out loud but the forest more than creeped him out: It scared him. You couldn't pay him enough money to step foot in it after dark, and dark was rapidly taking hold of the forest.

 _You had to pick here…_

He took a deep shuddering breath. The sound of voices caught his ears in the distance.

"I think she went this way."

"Is it a student?"

"If she is she's out after curfew and will make an excellent practice doll for our better students to work on their cruciatus curses."

"I don't think it was a student."

"One of the order?"

"Doesn't matter, let's go," the conversation stopped.

Draco knew had at least three enemies to dispatch. He had counted three distinct voices, but that didn't mean there were only three of them, it just meant that only three had been talkative. Those were not good odds.

He looked in to the woods. He did not want to be here when all light fled.

 _You can't leave her, if you do they will catch her and torture her and then hand her over to the dark Lord where she will just get tortured again._

 _She'll get tortured if I take her back_

There was no real decision for Draco. No matter his fear or desire to just leave he could not leave her. Draco started running into the woods his feet carrying him swiftly through.

 _She'll only get hurt once if you take her back yourself. Who knows what will happen if they get a hold of her._

 _And what if someone gets ideas like Greyback?_

Draco's pace quickened, he wouldn't let that happen.

He heard Granger scream in shock and then a second scream of pain followed.

 _Fuck_

He ran, not caring about where he was any longer. His desire to protect her overrode the fear of the woods completely.

He came into the clearing to find one death eater on top of a wandless Granger and three more standing back.

Four death eaters total.

 _Shit odds._

He didn't care. Draco's wand blazed to life. He felt the warmth of it flow through his arm and into his very core.

He lashed out, aided by the wands desire to help him and the element of surprise. The first two were down before the third faced him.

"Malfoy?" he sneered "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Draco didn't bother with an answer he attacked.

The third death eater was an older wizard, and one with much more experience than Draco. He parried easily.

"What are you doing out here?" the deatheater asked attacking. Draco parried…barely. He was outmatched by virtue of experience alone. He recognized the man now, he was the one they called Snitch-killer. He had the deaths of many a wizard on his hands.

"I heard you were at home babysitting for the Dark Lord." Snitch-killer struck again. Draco only managed a partial deflect this time and the spell burnt part of his shoulder. He yelled in pain as the spell seared his flesh.

"Draco!" Granger called out and Draco looked to her.

"Is this the one you are supposed to be babysitting?" the other man asked one hand around Granger's throat, the other holding a wand to her head.

"Let her go," Draco ordered.

The older Death eater attacked again and this time Draco parried and lashed out wordlessly. A bright white light shot from his wand and sent the older man somersaulting thirty feet into the air before crashing down to the ground with a force that sent twigs and dust flying out in a wide circle. He did not so much as twitch after impact.

Draco turned to the dark Wizard holding Granger.

"You have two choices," said Draco. "You can let me have her or I can kill you."

"I could kill her," he said pulling Granger up. She made a small sound of pain and Draco growled. His chin dipped down and he glared at the man.

"That wouldn't be wise. The dark Lord wants her kept alive as bait." Draco circled the man slightly looking for an opening. "If she dies I can promise you will be put at his feet to answer for it." Draco stopped. "But I can also promise, if _you_ kill her I will personally bring your body to him and lay your rotting corpse at his feet."

The darkness of his words surprised even Draco and he saw Granger's eyes widen.

"You wouldn't," the death eater challenged.

 _I would_ , thought Draco and he was almost scared by his own darkness.

"Would you like to put your life on the line and test that theory?" Draco asked and turned his wand slightly.

The Deatheate'rs eyes followed the motion.

With a swift elbow and a powerful twist Granger wrenched herself of Snitch-killers tight grasp and slammed her head back against the death eaters mouth.

He let out a cry and his wand fired scrapping across her temple.

"Granger!" Draco yelled and his wand fired off at the man sending him backwards into a large boulder.

There was a sickening crunch followed by a heavy silence.

Draco blinked and then ran to Hermione, dropping down in front of her. She stayed on her knees her hand clutching her temple.

She stayed almost perfectly still.

"Are you alright?" he asked and she yanked away from his fingers.

"Don't touch me," she ordered.

Draco ground his teeth.

 _She doesn't care that you just saved her. Everything you did and she still_ _hates you._

 _You should have let them have her._ He stopped that last thought immediately.

That was how the old Draco thought, not the one he was now.

 _You will not think that_ , he ordered himself. _She Deserves to be saved. No matter what she does, no matter how much she hates you SHE still deserves to be saved._

Draco got up and walked over to the fallen death eater by the great boulder. He checked the man's pulse, finding one he stood back and cast obliviate. He took the man's wand and tossed it far into the woods. Then he went over to the older death eater and checked his pulse. There was nothing.

 _You just killed a man._

A chill brushed across Draco's skin.

 _I didn't mean to..._

 _It doesn't matter what you meant to do what matters is that there is a dead body in front of you and you are to blame._

Draco felt his heart ratchet in his chest and a headache begin to pound in his temples and behind his eyes.

 _Murderer._

 _Pull yourself together,_ he ordered shutting down the feelings that threatened to undo him completely Draco closed everything off to cope he then waved his wand and incinerated the body. He couldn't have the others wondering what had become of their compatriot.

 _Let them think that it was the order…_

"What did you do?" demanded Granger from behind him.

"I had to get rid of the body," Draco answered her without looking back.

"You...killed him?" He could hear the surprise in her voice tinged with disapproval.

"Yes I killed him!" Draco spun around. "I didn't do it on purpose but if I had to do it again I would. It was him or me." _It was him or you..._ "Or didn't you notice that he was trying to kill me as I was trying to rescue you?!"

"And what about the others?" she asked, a tremble in her voice. He noticed that she had purposefully ignored his last question.

"What about the others?"

"Are you going to kill them too?" there was an odd hollowness to her voice even though she clearly expected the worst from him.

"No!" Draco snapped and then he looked at her. "Who the hell do you think I am?" He shook his head.

He couldn't remain calm, he tried to, he tried to keep the damn tight over his emotions but she was pushing him and he couldn't handle it. Not now. Not after what he had just done.

"I have had every fucking chance to make your life a living hell and I haven't taken it." He practically yelled at her. "You said you heard the conversation between me and Snape and yet your acting like you don't give a shit that I have risked absolutely everything for you."

"No you haven't," Granger shot back.

"Haven't I? What more could I do?" Demanded Draco.

"You could let me go," she answered.

"Don't be daft Granger," Draco scoffed. "You're better than that. You know exactly why I can't let you go."

"Because you're afraid of him," she challenged. "Because you're afraid that he'll torture you the way he tortured me."

"I would gladly take your place!" Draco yelled. His voice booming leaving a heavy silence in its wake.

"No you wouldn't..." Granger finally whispered.

"Yes," Draco stepped towards her. "I would." He put all the conviction of his heart behind the words and he saw her hear it in his voice. Saw her face change as she tried to process it.

 _You are playing with fire Draco, she still hates you now. She's still safe don't ruin that._

But he couldn't bear it in that moment. It was all too much and he needed to let the words out:

"If you had just stayed...I already figured out a way to solve this," he said shaking his head.

"What having me just give up and stay your prisoner?" she demanded.

"No," Draco shook his head and knelt in front of her so that they were almost eye level. "When your friends come to take you, you have to convince them to take me too."

"What?" Granger recoiled. "You're joking," her voice was incredulous. "What the hell would that solve? All that would do is put you in a position to have them beat the life out of you for what you have done to me."

"I know," answered Draco. "But, It's the only solution," answered Draco. "If I let you run on your own he will make me follow you. Make me track you like a bloodhound. I know he would use the imperius curse if he had to."

"What if you just ran away with me?" asked Granger her voice hinting at hope.

He wanted to say yes, he wanted to just run away with her. Instead he took a deep breath.

"And what do you think the dark Lord would do to my family if I ran away with you?" asked Draco, his voice soft rather than challenging. "Do you think he would let my father live after disappointing him so many times? And what about my mother?" He asked and tilted his head slightly to hold her gaze before she could look away. "Unlike my father my mother doesn't deserve that fate. She isn't a death eater, she hasn't done anything worthy of what would await her were I to choose to leave with you." He reached out to her and then stopped just millimeters from contact pulling back. "Would you ask that of me Granger?" he looked at her. "Would you ask me to sentence my own mother to death in order for you to be free?"

Her face scrunched together and she looked away.

"No..." she answered so quietly he wasn't sure if he had heard her.

"Is that what you want Granger?"

"I said no," she said louder and looked at him her eyes filled with tears and with anger. "But don't expect me to be happy about my situation."

"I'm not happy about your situation."

"Well you don't have to get tortured!"

Draco wanted to protest and tell her that he would rather take her place than hurt her.

 _Its better this way. She knows you care and she still hates you. What did you expect? You just laid it bare and still she hates you._

His memory took him to when she had first found out. She had been compassionate. She had reached out and touched him and cared for him as if he mattered...as if...as if she could forgive...

He shook his head. It was stupid to even entertain the thought that she could forgive and care for him now.

"Come," Draco said and held out his hand to her. "I need to take you back."

"I don't want to go back."

 _Neither do I._

"I don't care," said Draco sharply.

"I don't believe you," she challenged. "You do care."

"Believe what you want," he said grabbing her arm and hauling her to her feet. "I am still taking you back."

"Malfoy wait."

Draco caught the urgency in her voice and looked her in the eye.

"What?" he asked, trying to keep his tone neutral.

What more did she want from him?

Draco felt worn paper thin.

"Is that really your plan or are you lying to me to make me go back with you?"

"I could force you to go back with me now," answered Draco. "You haven't got a wand or a hope in hell of getting away. So why would I lie?"

"That's not an answer."

"What do you want me to say?" He asked his voice tight.

"Just tell me the truth Draco..."

Draco didn't miss the use of his first name and could see in her eyes she wasn't doing to try and manipulate him, it was an unconscious decision and it made that little flicker of hope in him tremble with breath.

 _You shouldn't hope._

"I told you the truth," Draco answered his voice softening. "I would trade places with you in a heartbeat," he swallowed. "When you first got here I couldn't say that..." he looked away and then looked back at her. "When your friends come tell them to take me captive I won't fight them."

"Promise?" She blinked up at him and then her eyes filled with that determination. "Promise me you will Draco and I'll go back. I can handle it knowing my friends will be safe and this will come to an end."

 _You are so beautiful and brave._

"I promise," he said and meant it. He wasn't worried about her giving things away this time. He could tell she was still mad at him and knew her eyes would hold the anger enough to satisfy any onlooker. He just hoped and prayed her friends would come for her soon.

"Okay," she took a breath and closed her eyes. When she opened them next there was a fire and determination like nothing he had ever seen before. She was ready to walk back into hell for her friends, for what she believed in. She was handing herself over willingly-not as a sacrifice but with the belief that she could endure whatever was to come and continue to fight for those she loved. She had refused to stay a damsel in distress.

Even with the scratch by her temple and the dirt on her clothes she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his life.

He looked at her and his heart stopped for a moment.

This was the woman he was willing to risk it all for.

"I'm ready," she said and Draco shook out of the moment and reached for her pulling her body in close. She wrapped her arms around his torso and Draco swallowed convulsively.

 _I'm not...I can't do this…_

 _Don't make me do this._

 _You have to._

 _They'll come for her, they have to_ , he told himself.

The sooner they got back the better.

Nothing good would be waiting for them when they returned, but the longer they were away the worse it would be...for both of them.

Draco lifted his wand and they apparated back to the Malfoy Manor.

It took a moment for Draco to register what he was seeing.

The floor of the mansion was soaked in red blood.

Bodies lay all around.

Before them The Dark Lord stood barefoot walking through the swath of bodies. A circle of Deatheater's stood around them leaving them with no hope of escape. Voldemort turned to face Draco and Hermione as they took in the horror.

"Well Draco," said Voldemort. "It looks like you were right, they did come for your bait after all."

* * *

 **That's all for now folks. Thanks so much for reading. Please let me know what you think of this chapter. It was super intense to write and I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave a review and some love-I will really appreciate it. Cheers  
**


	17. Chapter 15: The Aftermath

****A big thank you to everyone who took the time to review last chapter. Shout outs to:** **a**** ddictedtoloveandfiction, LillsBills, mega700201, ASJS, ChildofBrisingr, Toraach, Ayr, NadzKers12, Lanigra25, IanAlphaAxel, Scorpia11, KiaMinaya, Addfam2008, mmiller0000, alluringmango, EndlessReign, Rouch, ****and**** Aid4. Special shout out ** **to**** sherbertlemons98 ** **for the extra long and wonderfully in-depth review. And thank you to the guests:** "Guest" and "Who" As well as everyone who has taken the time to review since you are all appreciated.**

 *****WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS DARK***** **The light is coming, things are going to get better, but this and the next chapter are the darkest before the dawn moments.**

 ** ***Trigger Warning: This story contains Violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation, torture etc. I do not want anyone hurt by my writing so please if you can't handle those things then do not read.****

* * *

Chapter 15: The Aftermath

Hermione screamed and reached for Draco instinctively as her eyes took in the horrors before her.

She realized her error as soon as her limbs began moving towards him.

 _This is why he was always so cruel,_ her mind acknowledged silently. _This is what he was worried about._

Draco's arm shot out and he strong-armed her to the ground shocking her and sending her to her knees.

It was almost a relief-the fact that he had acted so quickly in rebuffing her. It meant they would believe his actions over hers.

There was a sickeningly wet sound as her hands thwacked against the sticky dark red puddle on the floor.

Hermione lifted her hands and looked at the blood and her eyes were drawn to the face of the nearest body on the floor. She recognized one of the members of the order, a man she had always seen lingering in the background. Her eyes wandered over the faces of others searching for Harry, searching for Ron. She didn't see them, but then…

Hermione screamed.

"Silencio," she heard Draco cast before her voice vanished.

She continued to scream and cry without a sound escaping her.

 _Fred..._

No, this wasn't real. This couldn't be happening.

But it was real and no matter how hard she pressed her nails into the soft skin of her upper arms she would not wake up.

Fred was dead.

Her chest ached.

He had come to save her, come with his brother.

He was like family to her and he had died trying to rescue her. Died because of her.

Tears flowed down her cheeks.

Hermione bawled and the fact that she couldn't hear her own sobs only made things worse.

She closed her eyes trying to block out the horror of the aftermath of battle around her.

"Well?" asked Voldemort, prodding Draco for his silence.

Hermione looked up at Draco as he inhaled.

She watched him regain his composure; watched as the mask slipped back into place.

"I told you," Draco said and Hermione could see the effort it took to put the conviction into his voice.

"Yesssss," hissed the dark Lord. "But SHE," he pointed to Hermione. "Was not here," He struck out with his wand and pain like lighting burned through Hermione. She tried to scream and silence echoed allowed as her mind cried out in pain.

"As soon as the group figured that out they retreated!" Yelled Voldemort. "For which I lay the blame on your shoulders!"

Hermione watched in horror as the dark Lord cast a crucio on Draco. He collapsed to his knees with a scream of pain.

"That is not my fault!" cried Draco when the curse ended. His chest heaving.

"Liar!" Voldemort yelled sending Draco flying backwards.

 _He's going to punish him because I ran away..._

A cry from the side of the room caught Hermione's attention and she saw Draco look over too trying to focus on where the cry had come from.

Narcissa was standing in the corner of the room tending to a large wound on his father's head. Her hands had stilled in their work and her focus was entirely trained on her son.

"I am not lying!" Draco managed to shout back.

Hermione felt the dread creep into her skin.

 _He's going to kill Draco...because of me..._

She watched as Voldemort lifted his wand and Draco went flying into the air like a rag doll.

"No!" she heard Narcissa cry and suddenly there was a crack of light.

The dark Lord lost concentration for a moment as the spell hit the back of his left shoulder.

Draco dropped the twenty feet from the raised ceiling to the floor and Hermione heard the distinct crunch of bones breaking and heard Draco groan in agony.

 _He's going to die are you just going to sit and watch?_ Hermione asked herself and she looked around quickly trying to figure out a plan of action.

Hermione watched Voldemort turn his attention to Narcissa.

 _He's distracted by Narcissa maybe you can do something._

She searched for anything she could use to help.

"How dare you!" Voldemort bellowed and black clouds filled the room lightning crawling through them as they rolled across the ceiling and floor.

Hermione looked up at the ceiling and she couldn't help but tremble at the dark power filling the room.

"He brought her back!" yelled Narcissa. "It's Crabbe's fault she escaped not Draco's"

For a moment Hermione was both surprised and impressed at the blond woman's show of passion and strength.

 _Don't just lay there,_ she told herself, do something. _Take advantage of the distraction she's providing._

Hermione moved to crawl towards Draco and she saw him lift his head to look at her.

Blood covered half of his face and the pain written there made Hermione want to get up and run to him

 _Save him!_ a part of her mind screamed. It wasn't rational or logical, but to that small piece of her it didn't matter.

Draco shook his head almost imperceptibly. To anyone else it would look like he was shaking off stars in his vision from the blow, but Granger got the message.

He didn't want her to move.

"Lies!" yelled Mr. Crabbe pulling Hermione's attention away from Draco and back to dangerous game of blame being played before them.

"My boy had nothing to do with her escape," said Mr. Crabbe

"No?" asked Narcissa her voice both powerful and terrified. "Then please do explain how when your son went in to see her is the only time she has ever so much as set a foot outside? My son has done an excellent job of keeping her contained. But ten minutes in the same room with yours and she escapes with his wand."

"You bitch!"

"SILENCE!" yelled Voldemort and he turned to Narcissa directly.

With a flick of his wrist and a twist of his wand he brought the blond woman to her knees as if she were a marionette.

"You may have only tapped me with a push of a spell," he said towering over her "but if you strike out against me again I will not hesitate to kill you."

No one in the room doubted his words.

"Forgive me my lord," said Narcissa," her throat straining as she looked up at him. "I only seek justice in your wrath. Do not blame my son for a crime against you for which he is entirely innocent. He has served you well," she pleaded.

Hermione noted that Lucius did nothing to come to his wife or son's aid, just sat frozen with fear in the corner where he had been all along and clutched a cloth to his bleeding head.

 _Coward._

"My Lord please forgive my sister. Let him tell you himself my lord. Ask the boy," said Bellatrix.

Voldemort turned to Draco marching across the floor he lifted Draco off the ground with a wave.

Draco called out in pain.

The sound tore into Hermione.

 _Please don't kill him,_ she silently begged.

Draco hung suspended in the air in front of Voldemort as the dark wizard came close and looked him in the eye.

"Now..." said the Dark Lord. "Tell me yourself why I shouldn't kill you."

Hermione saw the fight in Draco's face. Even though his mother had already thrown his friend under the bus, she could tell Draco was struggling with the choice to do the same.

The Dark Lord cast a crucio and Draco screamed his body writhing mid-air jerking and shaking from the pain.

Hermione called out for him, but not a sound left her lips saving her from giving away them both as the Dark Lord didn't so much as glance over his shoulder at her.

Voldemort pulled back and Draco's body slumped mid-air his limbs trembling.

"Don't make me ask again," said Voldemort.

"It was Crabbe," the words left Draco's mouth in a strangled gasp.

"What about Crabbe?" Voldemort bent down and lifted Draco's chin to look him in the eye.

"Crabbe is the reason she escaped." Draco choked out. "I told him not to go near her and he did. Its Crabbe's fault."

Voldemort dropped Draco and he fell to the floor crumpling. He groaned at the impact.

"That's right," Bellatrix voice chime in from behind. "My Lord, Draco was with us when we heard the commotion. The girl never had a chance to escape before. Draco had her locked up tight: not a toe out of line. Isn't that right Draco?" Bellatrix nodded vigorously.

"Yes," said Draco rolling on to his back so he could look up at the dark Lord. "She would have never got out If Crabbe hadn't gone in their against my will she would have been here when they came for her and you would have Potter."

"NO!" Yelled Crabbe senior. "Traitor"

"YOU WILL NOT SPEAK OUT OF TURN!" the Dark Lord bellowed and he turned away from Draco and towards Vincent Crabbe who was trembling in his shoes.

Mr. Crabbe stepped in front of the terrified boy.

"You can't hurt my boy."

"I said Silence!" Voldemort lashed out and sent Crabbe Senior flying into the mantle. Then Voldemort stretched out his hand and said to Crabbe. "Come here boy."

Crabbe, idiot that he was...ran.

Voldemort lashed out and a chains appeared around Crabbe's wrists connecting to the floor right in front of Voldemort. Link by link they slowly began pulling the boy backwards to his fate.

Voldemort waved a hand at Bellatrix and she came forward bringing a large chair to him.

The dark Lord sat as Crabbe's screams filled the room. His expression made it seem like he was listening to a beautiful rendition of a classical piece of music rather than the terrified cries of a teenage boy.

 _He is evil incarnate_ , thought Hermione and then she looked to Draco. She could tell it was taking every ounce of strength he had to lift his head and watch what was going on in the room.

As if sensing her eyes on him his head turned to face her. Their eyes met for a moment and then Draco looked away ashamed.

 _You had no choice,_ thought Hermione.

 _This is all my fault. If I had stayed his plan would have worked._

 _If he had told you his plan you wouldn't have ran,_ her mind argued back

 _He was only trying to protect me._

 _And now Fred is dead-That's your fault._

Hermione covered her face for a moment. Nothing she could do would block out the sound of Vincent Crabbe's screams and the angry clank of the chain as each link disappeared into the ground dragging Vincent closer and closer to his fate.

Crabbe's father tried to intervene again.

This time the dark Lord cast a crucio and the deeper screams of a father blended with those of his son.

When Crabbe was finally at Voldemort's feet the dark Lord looked own and lifted his wand with deliberate slowness.

"Please," Vincent Crabbe begged for mercy.

"Let's have a look at what happened shall we?" The Dark Lord smiled and Crabbe screamed as his mind was penetrated.

Silence filled the room and for a moment it was more eerie than the screaming.

Then the dark Lord pulled back with a howl and struck Crabbe across the face sending him to the ground.

"You!" he glared, his eyes almost glowing red with rage. Blackened lightning cracked through the room.

"Please Mercy my lord," said Mr. Crabbe

"Mercy!?" Voldemort turned "Mercy? This boy's inability to control his prick lead to me LOSING POTTER!" He whirled back. "There can be no mercy!"

"No!" Mr. Crabbe lunched forward and Voldemort turned yelling the killing curse with the power of a thunderclap.

The older man was dead before he hit the floor.

Hermione watched as Crabbe looked to Draco. Saw the boys look at each other. The fear and accusation in Crabbe's eyes, and then…Draco closed his eyes and turned his head away.

Hermione took one last look at the horror before her and as Voldemort turned on Crabbe.

When the screams started she too looked away.

* * *

When the screams stopped Voldemort came over to Draco looking down at him.

"You did well," said Voldemort. "Bringing her back. For your loyalty and for your service I will forgive you for speaking back to me as you did." He placed a foot atop Draco's chest and Draco groaned in pain. "You have brought some redemption to your families name and standing in my eyes."

"Thank you my Lord," Draco managed to grind out, surprising Hermione with his ability to answer without sounding hateful or spiteful.

She could hear the air wheezing in and out of Draco's lungs.

"Now..." said Voldemort turning towards her. "We must teach this one a lesson."

Fear raced through Hermione's body.

She looked to Draco, even though she knew he could do nothing she still looked to him to save her.  
She watched with a different kind of horror as Draco, barely able to move, reached for his own wand to try and save her despite the futility of it all.

A spell from Narcissa's wand washed over Draco, stilling his hand before the Dark Lord-or anyone else in the room for that matter-had a chance to notice the fact that her captor had tried to go to her aid.

Hermione held his eyes as Draco fought his mothers spell for a moment before her magic overwhelmed him closing his eyes. 

Hermione looked at Narcissa. Narcissa looked away.

There was no help for her.

She was alone.

Hermione looked up at the Dark Lord who was now standing directly above her.

 _He might kill me._

 _He said teach a lesson…_

Voldemort raised his wand.

"You little Mudblood are never going to learn to never try and escape."

The Crucio hit her and Hermione screamed.

There was nothing in the world like it.

Fire and lightning burned her. Pain shot through every fiber of her being.

Voldemort's Crucio hurt more than anything Hermione had ever felt in her life.

There was nothing but the pain.

And then it stopped.

She gasped for air.

And he cast it again.

The world became agony.

She begged for it to cease.

The pain stopped after a moment and she could feel the tears running down her cheeks.

It a hundred thousand time more than the ones that had come from Draco. Now, having felt true hate through the curse she knew that Draco had been sparing her this...true torture.

Somehow not being able to make a sound as the dark Lord cursed her made it worse.

It was as if the pain stayed inside instead of a portion escaping on the release of a scream.

"No," said Voldemort with a smile. "That simply won't do. I want to hear you scream."

He waved his wand revoking Draco's silencio and struck out again.

Hermione screamed and this time the sound of her cries echoed shrilly against the walls.

It seemed to go on forever.

Time lost meaning.

It was only after what felt like an eternity that it finally stopped.

"Take her away," he ordered.

Someone dragged her down the stairs.

She barely felt it.

The pain of being tossed into the room.

The impact of the stairs was nothing.

The stone floor numbed her.

Shaking and trembling Hermione gave into exhaustion.

* * *

When she woke Hermione found herself back in the cellar.

Fear wrenched at her insides as she remembered what had happened last time she was there in the darkness.

She scrambled to her feet and the clink of heavy chains rattled around her. The cuffs on her ankles and wrists were heavy iron and the weight of them made it difficult to lift her limbs.

There would be no fighting back if anyone came to her while here.

 _Draco…how could you let them put me back here?_ She silently asked and then she remembered how badly he had been hurt.

 _He didn't **let** you end up here,_ she told herself.

The Dark Lord had tortured him as well. She remembered seeing his body hit the wall and crumple. Remembered his cries of anguish as Voldemort had unleashed the Crutiatus curse on him.

Hermione sat back down and hugged her knees to her chest.

 _You're alive, that's what matters. You have lived to fight another day._

What about Draco? Was he okay? Her thoughts turned to him.

She had hated hearing him scream and had wanted to make it stop.

Is that how it felt for him every time she was hurt? She wondered.

Hermione thought of how hard it was to listen to Voldemort torture him and knew that there was no way she was strong enough to be able to turn her wand on Draco to torture him. It would kill her. But what if it was to save his life? Could she do it then? She shook her head, she didn't want to think about that.

 _Your friends came for you_ , her mind said softly-trying to reassure her.

 _And I missed them, I ran and I missed them and people died._

 _Fred died._

 _People would have died whether you were here or not, Maybe Harry or Ron would have died if you were here and they stayed to fight._

 _The others…their blood is still on my hands._ _They died in vain… for me…_

Silent tears trickled down her cheeks. She owed it to those who had died to stay alive so that she had the hours and the days to honor their sacrifice by saving lives. How many of the order had died? She didn't want to think about it now, but resolved to ask Harry about it when she finally got out of this place.

What about Ron? Would he blame her for his brother's death? He would never truly forgive her for it if he did. And even if he did the death would hand between them.

 _I'm so sorry Ron._

 _I'm sorry Fred._ She looked up towards the ceiling. _Wherever you are I hope you can hear me. I hope you know I am sorry. I am so sorry._

She cried for a while, having nothing else to do and needing to mourn the loss of her friend. After a while her mind drifted back to Draco. In the woods he had said twice that he wanted her friends to save her. Was he really on Voldemort's side? Wanting to use her to get to them?

 _Of course he is,_ her mind chimed, _he said it himself 'then it will be over' he just wants it to be done so he doesn't have to be caught in the middle one moment longer._

 _Then why say he would take my place?_

 _Why did he reach for his wand as if to save me?_

Hermione squeezed her eyes shut.

A clink at the door let her know someone was coming and her eyes opened.

It was a Deatheater, someone she didn't recognize.

"Hello pet," he said with a wicked smiled.

Hermione didn't respond and didn't bother to move away.

He came inside the cellar and stood over top of her.

"You are a lovely one aren't you," he grabbed hold of her hair and raised her too her feet. His breath smelled of rotten fish and Hermione turned her head away.

His hand came out to caress her going straight for her chest.

"Don't touch me," she ordered batting his hand away.

"Why not luv? You're just a prisoner here. Who cares what happens to you?"

"The last man who tried to touch me died at the Dark Lord's feet," Hermione shot back.

"That boy was an idiot and cost the Dark Lord his prize," the man smiled revealing crooked yellowed teeth. "I ain't gunna do that. I'm just gunna enjoy you a bit. I've served the Dark Lord since the beginning. I've earned it."

"You can't earn me. I'm not a prize."

"Oh yes you are."

"Well I'm not your prize."

"Shut up bitch," he backhanded her hard and Hermione dropped to the floor from the force of the blow. "We can do this the hard way or the easy way," he said. "That's the only choice you get, because whether you like it or not I'm gunna have you."

Hermione wiped her lip and stood facing him.

"I'll take the hard way," she said and threw a punch.

* * *

Draco woke slowly blinking away the fog from his vision. He was laying in his bed tucked in neatly between the covers. His mother was sitting at his side.

"Draco," she leaned forward and put an hand to his forehead. "Good, you're awake," she let out an audible sigh. "How do you feel?"

"Like crap," he answered honestly, his vocal chords still ached from screaming.

Memories of what had happened came rushing back all at once.

He was lucky to be alive, if you could call it that.

"Is Vincent?"

"Dead," she answered his question.

Draco looked away.

"You did the right thing," Narcissa tried to reassure.

 _Of course you would say that mother, you betrayed him first to save me._

"Turning over my friend to be tortured and killed. Yes, that sound like the 'Right thing' to do," said Draco his voice dripping with disdain and sarcasm.

"Draco!" his mother snapped.

"What?" he threw off the covers and found himself in just his boxers.

The air hit him and he shivered.

"Get back in bed."

"No," said Draco suddenly hit with a simple priority. His last memory was of Voldemort walking towards Hermione. "Where is Granger?"

"Down in the cellar," She answered as if it were obvious.

 _She's alive._

Relief rushed through him and he wobbled on his feet.

"Sit down this instant," his mother ordered and pushed him down onto the bed. Draco's head was pounding she was alive. That was all that mattered. He stopped. No, that was not all that mattered. She needed to be safe and the cellar was NOT a safe place for her.

Draco's stomach dropped.

"Why is she there?" he managed to ask through strangled vocal chords.

"Well she couldn't be up here, not while you were unconscious. I wouldn't have been able to leave the room for one moment after what she did to Crabbe."

"She wouldn't stab me."

"She stabbed Crabbe for copping a feel how much worse will she do to you given the opportunity and what you've done."

Draco looked away, his mother didn't know about what he had and hadn't done with Hermione. What she believed or thought he might have done though...

 _I would deserve it for what I've done…_

 _Granger wouldn't do that...she wouldn't._

 _She might, she wants to get back to her friends. If she took you out of the equation she could go to them without a worry._

 _She wouldn't_ , he protested.

 _After what you brought her back to she might._

Somehow the idea that Hermione could be altered from being unfailingly 'Good' was more distressing than the idea of her turning a wand on him.

He wanted to preserve the good in her as much as he wanted to keep her breathing.

 _What is wrong with you?_

"Draco?" his mother asked quietly questioning his sudden silence.

His mother's words made sense to him even though the fact that his mother thought him capable of what she was suggesting rotted his stomach.

 _Hermione is strong enough. She is good. She will stay good._

 _There is only so far a person can be pushed before they break._

 _How long would it be before the Granger he admired was twisted into something beyond recognition_. He felt suddenly dizzy and lay back. He heard the panicked intake of breath from his mother.

"Are you alright?" asked Narcissa touching his arm lightly.

"I'm fine," Draco managed. "Aren't I?"

"Your ribs were broken and your arm, but both are mending."

"Well thank Merlin for that," said Draco dryly. Then he turned his head to his mother. "Thank you for sticking up for me," he said meaning it. If she hadn't intervened when she had he would likely be dead.

"Rest," Narcissa ordered with a small smile at his words. "I'll get you something to eat."

"Okay," Draco answered, closing his eyes and leaning back.

He had been right.

His mother loved him.

She had risked the wrath of the dark Lord to save him and she had done it without any hesitation.

 _That's why you couldn't leave her behind,_ he thought closing his eyes. _She deserves your loyalty._

 _She deserves the love of a better son._

No sooner had his mother left the room than Draco felt his stomach clench through the bond.

 _Granger…_

She was in trouble.

He could feel it.

There was no resisting the pull-not because it was too strong, but because Draco wouldn't stand by knowing she was in danger.

He stood again and the room swam.

 _You are too weak._

 _I don't care._

 _You're going to get yourself killed._

He grabbed his wand and waved it dressing in a split second

 _Like I said,_ he answered himself looking in the mirror, _I don't care._

Draco apparated to the cellar where he was greeted by two motionless bodies laying on the floor.

* * *

 **And that is where I leave you for this chapter.**

 **I hope you enjoyed it, as much as a dark chapter like this can be enjoyed. I tend to gloss over some of the dark but for this chapter I felt it was necessary for the feel and for what is to come.** **I really don't want to kill off any of the good guys, but I am trying to keep it realistic and close to the books in as many ways as I can. This is, as I have said very much a "what if" story. I am therefore trying to keep it as realistic as possible.**

 **Please review and let me know what you think of this chapter. Cheers  
**


	18. Chapter 16: The Illusion

**Thank you to everyone who took the time last chapter to review** : addictedtoloveandfiction, mmiller0000, catsy27, LillsBills, roon0, Joey Ramsden, alluringmango, Scorpia11, inkwolf199 **and guest** "Who" **as well as all of the other** "Guest" **reviews for this chapter and everyone who has taken the time to review since.**

 *****Trigger Warning: This chapter is dark. Some of the contents could be triggering for people. So please, don't read if it's not something you can handle.** **That said:** **This chapter does have some really sweet moments** **, if you start reading this chapter I hope you will read all the way to the end.** _ **Things are not always as they seem.**_ **I hope you enjoy**

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Chapter 16: The Illusion

"Granger!" Draco called out to Hermione and rushed over to her body.

In an instant she turned and the small paring knife in her hands was suddenly at his throat.

Draco froze instinctively feeling the sharp edge press into his neck. The position was hard on his knees, but he didn't dare move.

"Don't touch me," she ordered.

Draco held up his hands in surrender while his eyes looked her up and down to check for injuries. He saw that her clothing was bloodstained, however he couldn't see any open wounds on her skin.

Draco swallowed.

 _She's alive, focus on that._

 _But did he…?_

A quick glance over the scene in front of him told him that she had killed the deatheater before he had managed to touch her.

"Are you okay?" he managed, not knowing what else to say.

"Do I look okay to you Malfoy?" she asked shaking her head in disbelief at him asking that kind of a question given the situation. "I just killed a man," she barked the word out. "I'll never be okay from that."

"It was self defense," Draco argued back.

She couldn't blame herself for this. She shouldn't have been forced into a situation like this in the first place.

"How do you know that?" Hermione's voice was loud.

It was Draco's turn to look at her incredulously.

 _Because I know you_ , he thought quietly, _and I know you wouldn't just kill a man in cold blood._

"It doesn't change what I did," she said lowly.

"It's not your fault."

"But..."

"It's not your fault Granger," Draco said again, firmly but softly.

She looked up at him and he saw tears well in her eyes.

 _Please don't cry. It guts me when you cry._

"Can I take you back to my room please?" He offered, wanting to take her away from this place which held too many horrible memories. "You can wash up, change into some fresh clothes."

"I'm not wearing your clothes."

Somehow those words hurt Draco. A part of him had liked seeing her in his clothes. He had liked the look of them on her sure, but it was more than that.

 _It's because when she wears them it makes it seem like she's yours._

 _That's so wrong of you to think especially now, when she is vulnerable like this. She's not yours._

 _She will never be yours._

"That's fine, I don't care whose clothes you wear," he said dismissively deciding that this was not the time to argue semantics. He wanted to get her somewhere safe that was his first priority. "I just figure you don't want to stay in ones soaked with the blood of the man you just killed," Draco's voice was harsher than he intended as he was distracted by the excruciating pounding in his head. As he reached to press a palm against his temple he felt the world tilt. His legs suddenly felt boneless; he wobbled.

 _You should have listened to your mother and stayed in bed. Fainting here won't do anyone any good,_ his internal critic chastised.

 _I couldn't just leave her,_ he answered back.

"Draco?" Hermione's voice questioned.

"I'll be fine," he waved her off… and then his legs gave out.

Hermione caught him as he fell breaking part of the fall.

"You're still hurt," she said stating the obvious.

"I'm fine," he lied.

He was far from fine.

Even the gentle pressure of her arms around him was causing him pain. Still, he wasn't about to tell her to stop. She was holding him, even if it was just to stop him from falling over, it meant she didn't hate him enough to let him just go.

He was so tired...Draco's head dropped to her shoulder and he felt her stiffen for a moment.

 _You've pushed too far leaning on her._

His head felt heavy.

He moved to lift it and pull away from her and then stopped when he felt her relax and just let him be for a moment.

Merlin it felt nice to have someone to lean on.

He closed his eyes and savored the sensation.

"What do we do about…him?" Hermione's question hung in the air unfinished.

She wanted to know what they were going to do about the body next to them. Draco struggled to pull strength back into his limbs. She was right, they needed to deal with the body.

"I'll take care of it," answered Draco. "Just give me a moment," his voice was soft.

 _You need to take care of it sooner rather than later before someone comes in and finds you like this,_ he told himself.

Draco raised his head and, fighting the deep desire to just stay wrapped in the cocoon of her warm embrace he stood. Her arms were open ready to catch him if he fell again and that fact made his chest ache with a sentiment he didn't want to address.

Draco raised his wand and incinerated the body and all the traces. He look the man's wand and hesitated holding it in his hand. The wand was gnarled and black. It felt odd in Draco's hand: Cold.

Granger looked at him and he debated giving it to her. She had won the wand and its loyalty would likely have changed hands to her at the death of its master, but the wand was dark and twisted and even holding it Draco felt off. This wand had killed many.

"Destroy it," Granger said looking at him. "It needs to be destroyed."

"You're not going to ask me to let you keep it?"

She hesitated for a moment.

"No," she said shaking his head. "I could never carry a wand like that."

He could tell she meant it.

"Fine," he nodded and then snapped the wand in half before destroying it with his own. He looked at Granger.

"Will you come back to my room with me?" he asked his tone softened. "It's safer there."

"Is it?" she asked shaking her head. "If Crabbe could get in someone else could to."

"Crabbe was an idiot," Draco snapped. "I told him to stay away from you and he didn't listen he brought his fate upon himself."

"Is that what you are telling yourself?" she asked. Her words stabbed at Draco's heart. Draco hated Crabbe for what he had done, or tried to do to Granger, and yet he had been friends with the boy for years. He felt guilt at not feeling worse for having lost someone he had once thought of as friend. He was only mildly surprised that Granger wasn't happy about Crabbe's death.

 _She's too good for that._

Another thought dawned on him and Draco's mind went dark.

Maybe it was the pain or maybe it was the fact that he had just allowed himself to be vulnerable with her for a moment only to have it thrown back in his face that had him angry and biting.

"Would you rather the Dark Lord had killed me instead?" demanded Draco, the pain making him snap at her "I'm sure the dark lord would be all about keeping you safe once I am gone. Maybe he'll bind you to someone else? Hmmm? Someone like Greyback."

Granger lashed out at Draco forgetting that the knife was still in her hand.

She caught him across the collarbone blood staining his white shirt immediately.

Draco let out a yell as the blade sliced cleanly through fabric and flesh.

"Draco?!" his mother's voice echoed from the top of the stairs.

 _No, not now._

"Its fine," Draco tried to keep his mother from coming down, knowing in his heart it was futile.

She had told him to stay in bed, he hadn't listened and now he had just let out a yell from the cellar. Fat chance she was just going to believe that everything was okay and leave them be together down here.

He had to get the knife from Hermione before his mother saw that she had hurt him

"Dammit Granger," Draco growled. "Give me that knife." He blinked back stars from his vision as his legs threatened to give out beneath him.

"Fuck you Malfoy."

He bit his tongue back against a retort.

 _You shouldn't have said those things about Greyback. That was cruel._

"His mother apparated into the Cellar with a pop.

Seeing the knife in Granger's hand and the blood on her son she struck immediately sending the knife flying against the wall with a clatter and Granger backwards into the stone wall.

Narcissa lashed out with several more curses back to back, each striking Granger directly, until finally Draco could stand it no longer and had to step in.

"Enough," he said.

Narcissa turned to him, her pale face tight with fury.

"You let her keep the blade?" her voice was high and tense.

"I thought she had lost it in the woods. Forgive me for not checking," he said somewhat smartly.

The slap hit him hard across the face, with the condition he was in it was enough to knock him down. He heard Hermione's gasp from across the room.

 _Please don't do anything stupid Granger…_

"I warned you Draco!" his mother yelled. "You are not taking her back up to your room. This is my house. She is going to stay here."

Shame bloomed in Draco's chest.

This was the second time his mother had struck him in recent history and both times had been for him acting rashly on Granger's behalf. The throb in his cheek hurt less than the pounding in his head and yet he would rather have the pain in his head than the one from his mother's strike.

Heat built up behind his eyes.

Draco glanced across the room at Granger who wouldn't meet his gaze.

 _Of course she won't look at you, you're pathetic._

He didn't know what he would see in Hermione's eyes anyway if she had met his, and wasn't sure if he wanted to see them now.

 _Don't you dare give up now_ , he ordered himself. _You will not let yourself snivel and cringe. Stand up. Stand up for her._

Draco stood wobbling.

"Like hell she is," he ground out lowly, despite everything, despite the fact that she had just cut him he still stood up for her, on her side against his mother. "You know what will happen to her if she does. Some deatheater is going to come wandering in and Rape her."

"And you only want her for yourself," Narcissa said and Draco heard the judgement and venom in his mother's voice. Draco's chest tightened knowing his mother could think him capable of such things.

"I haven't _**had**_ her yet," Draco shot back, the same he was still feeling from her slap had him unable to keep himself from defending his view in his mother's eyes. His father's approval meant little to him now, but his mother's still counted for much in his world.

"Is that so?" Greyback's voice echoed from the top of the stairs and Draco's spine went ridged.

 _Fine time you pick to tell your mother you're not as dark as she thinks. Now look what you've done._

"Fuck," muttered Draco and went over to Granger hauling her up from the ground roughly. Adrenaline had his legs holding him up at this point: pure adrenaline.

He needed to get Granger out of the cellar and back to his room.

He needed a moment, just a moment, to think of a plan before Greyback went running his mouth to Voldemort.

Narcissa's cheeks were pink with shock as she looked at her son. There were a million emotions flitting across her face and Draco didn't have time to read them all.

"Now look what you've done mother," said Draco pushing the blame on her and brushing past. "I hope you're happy."

Narcissa followed him up the stairs as Draco dragged Granger in tow behind him.

Draco was surprised to find Hermione coming along easily and without struggle, surprised and relieved if she tried to fight his hold now he wasn't sure he could manage to keep her and if he couldn't keep her close he couldn't protect her.

Voldemort and Greyback were waiting in the main room for him, blocking his path back to his room..

Draco's steps halted. The look on the dark Lords face was far from pleasant and the look on Greyback's had Draco regretting his decision to let the man live.

"Draco," said Voldemort. "It has been brought to my attention that you haven't claimed this prize of yours. Is that true?"

Sweat broke out across Draco's skin and he felt his blood run cold.

 _Think, Draco, think._

"She has been entertaining me quite well with her screams," said Draco with a growl. "Of which I plan on extracting more from her in just a moment, for her part in having me fall short in your eyes." He swallowed

 _Please be a good enough lie…_

"So, if you would permit me to pass..." he continued letting the last word hang in the air.

Voldemort 'tsked'.

"If you wish to have her then _**have her.**_ Not taking her to bed makes it seem as if you are growing soft on her."

Draco could not believe the Dark Lords words.

How much more did he have to do to prove to everyone that Granger was his enemy?

Granger pulled back against Draco's grip and his hand tightened reflexively around her bicep to the point of bruising. She let out a small whimper.

He hated hurting her, even that small amount.

"You should use her for what she is worth or..." said Voldemort. "Let Greyback have her. There is no point in wasting a perfectly viable cunt. You can still torture her if that's all you want from her and Greyback can have what you aren't claiming for your own."

"No," Granger cried out and Draco turned and backhanded her hard enough to hurt his own knuckles. She almost went down and he held her up. He felt his knees almost give way and the room spin slightly.

 _I am so sorry Granger,_ he thought while silently praying for the strength to remain upright. He could not afford to collapse now.

"I won't share with a mutt like him," Draco said. "And if he relayed my words correctly he would have said 'I haven't taken her _**Yet**_." Draco proclaimed the last word with heavy emphasis. He grabbed Hermione placing her in front of him facing away so her body was pulled flush against him.

He needed to make a show of her, make a show of this.

There was no arousal at having her close in these circumstances. He got nothing out of what was to come. He hated the plan the second it had formulated in his mind, and yet he couldn't see any other options.

Draco tore Hermione's shirt front down with a loud rip. She screamed struggling.

"Now seems like as good of a time as any," Draco smiled at the Dark Lord as he reached around her front and cupped her breast over her bra, she tried to pull away he wouldn't let her. "Unless you object my Lord," said Draco courteously.

"By all means," Voldemort waved his hand "Continue."

"I would prefer my room," said Draco. "I'm not one for an audience, but if the mutt wants to torture himself and watch so he can crawling back and tell you about my sex life then he's free to, by all means."

Voldemort nodded and Draco began dragging Hermione to the stairs. He didn't dare apparate with her kicking and screaming. He was liable to lose an eye that way. He let her scream and kick and fight hating every single second of it.

"Draco don't do this please!" she cried out, the desperation in her voice clear.

 _She actually believes you would do this..._

"Shut up you damn mudblood, you knew this was coming," he yelled loud enough for everyone to hear him. His chest hurt and it was hard to breathe.

"No..." He watched the tears form in her eyes. "No...no you cant."

"I said shut it," he ordered and slapped her hard.

* * *

Hermione cried out at the blow more shocked than hurt, it wasn't near as hard as the one he had done in front of everyone else, but she was too distracted by the circumstances to notice.

 _How could he do this to me? After everything he has said. This isn't protecting me._

This was worse than death.

She would rather die.

Anything else she could survive, but not this.

Hermione kicked at him and he let go swearing. She made it two steps on the stairs before he had her again this time he grabbed her by her hair and began dragging her up the stairs that way.

She struggled, her hair pulling at the roots.

"Draco please!" She cried again. He threw her over the threshold into his room and she shrieked.

Draco pointed the wand at her and Hermione braced for whatever was to come.

"Speculum vocem" he cast quietly and a light come from his wand creating a ball at her vocal chords.

Hermione blinked. He hadn't attacked her…

Draco flicked the wand sideways and the ball of light that had come from her throat continued to cry out and say things in her voice while Hermione remained motionless watching.

She heard herself scream and beg as the light flickered with each sound. She watched half horrified, half fascinated.

"Shut up and take it," Draco said loudly he met her eyes for a brief moment and Hermione felt her mouth go dry. He was angry and there was something else…pain and not the physical kind.

He broke from her gaze and a look of extreme concentration appeared on his face.

Then he looked back at Hermione seeming to take her whole body in and said:

"Praestrigiae de Verum Vitae" Hermione saw a light flow over her body, it clung to her skin molding itself to her… and then an image of herself, a direct replication, stepped away from her body fully formed.

Hermione let out a scream but no sound came out. A moment later her disembodied voice screamed from its glowing ball.

With a careful stitching motion of his wand Draco sewed the two illusions together in the air. The glowing ball of light became a part of the image of herself and the two moved as one.

Hermione watched, her fear momentarily replaced with utter fascination. She knew of illusionists who were excellent at their craft and she had heard that Draco was actually talented in using more complicated spells. The snake he had cast at Harry during their second year had been beyond that of most students his age, so this shouldn't surprise her and yet it did.

* * *

Draco's heart pounded in his chest.

 _It worked._

Relief washed through him and then he looked over at Hermione.

Draco might have been offended at the look of surprise on Hermione's face if he hadn't taken a moment to remind himself that she had no idea that he had created illusions before, many times. Half of the work in his wardrobe was illusion work.

He lived in a family that was obsessed with image and had become obsessed with it himself in more than one way. He had created image after image in order to hide and in order to make the places that he hid so much better than the reality he tried so desperately to escape.

He looked at the image of Hermione before him. If he didn't know better he wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the illusion standing before him and the real Hermione Granger who was standing off to the side looking at him.

Draco had never managed this level of detail before in his work and he knew it was the wand allowing him to create beyond his experience.

True he had sent images of himself around the school before, for the sake of pranks or to try and get out of detention, but it was one thing to work with an image he was used to and another to pick a person he had never tried to copy and pair it with the vocal spell he had only just recently mastered.

The wand in hand felt warm and he turned it towards himself.

"Praestrogiae de Verum Vitae," he repeated the spell and an image of himself stepped forward. He was used to using this spell on himself so it took a fraction of the time.

He uttered the spell for his voice and took his own voice away stitching it into the second illusion.

When the second spell was finished Draco and Hermione stood staring at perfect recreations of themselves who opened their mouths calling out but remaining otherwise motionless.

It was slightly terrifying-like marionettes without strings.

Draco looked to the real Granger and knew she could see the storm in his eyes.

 _She shouldn't have to see this…_

He wanted to tell her to look away, but had no voice to do so.

He waved his wand and the illusion of himself turned to the illusion of Hermione and attacked her throwing her down on the bed.

The illusion responded: she screamed and cried.

Real Granger looked on, frozen in horror.

He could almost hear her thinking:

' _That could have been me.'_

He could only imagine how terrifying it was to see, to watch herself outside her body being set upon.

Hermione just stood and stared as Draco checked the door leaving it open half a foot so that passersby could see what was happening.

Then Draco turned back to Hermione and grabbed her arm, pulling her after him away from the scene. He took her to the bathroom pushing her in soundlessly closing the door behind them. He set her by the far wall and then turned and created a small hole in the wall to be able to observe his magic and keep the spell going with his wand.

Draco then turned to watch the violence of the illusions.

He wanted to look away but two things kept his eyes trained on the fabricated rape taking place just a few feet away:

First, he needed to make sure the illusion remained perfectly in place or risk both his and Hermione's death.

Second, he needed to watch so that if Voldemort looked in his mind and got past his barriers he could intentionally pull up these images in his mind. As his illusionary tore at Hermione's pants she fought against her kicking and screaming Draco looked away briefly, unable to bear the sight and saw that Granger was watching him, her cheeks stained with tears.

She looked as if she were seeing right to his very core.

 _Don't look in, there's nothing good inside_ , he said silently and turned back to the image and the sound of Hermione's shrill scream had him shuddering.

Suddenly he felt a hand in his and he looked up to see Granger right next to him looking into his eyes as if she knew everything. Draco got lost in those eyes for a moment until another scream shattered the moment and he shuddered again looking away from the real her and back to the illusion. His fingers tightened around hers needing to hold her even though he knew he shouldn't.

He felt her curl into his back and her arm slipped around him holding her body to his back. Draco trembled involuntarily.

She squeezed his hand.

He squeezed hers back.

Somehow her presence there in that room with him-her kind touch-became everything and the risk of doing this, creating this elaborate illusion, became completely worth it. Draco knew there was now virtually nothing he wouldn't do to keep her safe.

His eyes caught sight of Greyback at the door the illusion of Draco turned at Draco's thoughts and gave Greyback the finger then kept going at Granger. Greyback growled and turned away.

Draco felt disgust on many levels and if sensing his tension Hermione stroked her free hand across his chest. He wanted to his from the pain as she pulled at the fine cut she had left in his skin, but dared not. The pain was a fine exchange for the comfort of her touch.

* * *

The real Draco and Hermione stayed that way for an hour in the bathroom, him keeping up the spell and her holding him. It felt like an eternity to Draco and it would have been utterly unbearable to watch and hear if Hermione's hand hadn't been wrapped around his own and her body tucking in close at his back.

Draco extracted himself from her hold as the illusions began to fade. He moved into the bedroom and closed the door with a soft click. When he turned around he saw Granger standing there looking at him. He watched as the last glimmer of their illusions faded and the orbs of light that contained their voices returned to their respective throats.

A silence filled the room and they just stood looking at one another for a moment

"How is your face?" Draco asked wanting breaking the silence. He wanted to come close and examine her already bruising cheek, but afraid to-was afraid of what she might be thinking.

Everything that had happened in the last twenty four hours had Draco feeling shaky at best. His ribs were still killing him, but he no long felt as if he were about to collapse. The unsteadiness he felt was solely from emotional wreckage battering around inside him.

"Its fine," she answered and then paused before continuing "Draco?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

Her words hung in the air between them.

Draco looked at her. He couldn't figure out what to say.

Was ' _your_ welcome' an appropriate answer to a comment like that? He didn't feel like it was.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

Draco shook his head unable to form words.

She stepped closer.

"Draco..."

Draco stepped back. Even though he had just allowed her to comfort him moments before he didn't trust her touch now.

With the door closed and the illusion gone he felt far too raw to be touched, and her eyes…her eyes were looking right into him.

"Draco please don't shut me out," she said and reached for him.

"I can't..." Draco stepped away again.

"Please, Draco…"

"I can't," he said again. "That was...stupid of me, the illusion was a stupid risk," he turned away from her.

 _I'd do it again_

 _I'd risk it again to protect you._

"It meant everything to me Draco."

His head whipped around to look at her.

"I mean it," she said. "I don't want to be here, I don't want to be tortured but I can survive it. If you had...It would have been worse than dying."

"I told you I would never," he said to lowly she barely caught it.

"Thank you."

"Stop saying that!" Draco ordered.

""Why?"

"Because you can't thank me for anything after what I have put you through."

"To protect me," Hermione countered.

"That doesn't make it better," he countered.

"Yes it does!" she yelled back.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. This scene was in my head from almost the first moment I came up with the story and a lot of the writing has been leading up to this moment. This was a hard chapter to write and very emotional for me, but also very cathartic.**

 **The spell: 'Praestrigaiae de verum Vitae' that Draco uses literally translates to "Ghosts from Life" I spent quite a while trying to figure out the language I wanted to use for that spell because it's more than just a standard illusion. They have to be able to act and move on their own so that's what I eventually came up with. Please review and let me know what you thought. If you haven't reviewed yet this is the chapter that I need some love on more than almost any other so if you liked it please let me know.**


	19. Chapter 17: The Confrontation

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter, shout outs to** : EndlessReign, SwanCall, ChildofBrisingr, Scorpia11, alluringmango, inkwolf199, TamaeKurogane, Toraach, addictedtoloveandfiction, inkwolf199, and to the guest "Who" **As well as everyone who has taken the time to review since. You** are all Appreciated so very much.

 **This chapter is dedicated to** mmiller0000, **thank you for taking the time to review chapter by chapter and for the feedback. Your reviews are awesome and help keep me motivated. I hope I can continue to keep you entertained with a story that isn't too predictable.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. It contains, violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. Reader Digression is advised.**

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Chapter 17: The Confrontation

Draco stood silently in front of Hermione for a moment unable to handle the fact that she was acknowledging he cared and telling him that to her it _**did**_ make things different.

A static started screaming in his ears, this...her words...were too much for his brain to function clearly.

"Do you trust me?" he asked softly, over the buzz in his head.

She hesitated for only the barest of moments before meeting his eyes squarely and nodding.

"Say it out loud please," he asked needing to hear the words.

"I trust you Draco, against my better judgement I do."

Draco swallowed.

 _You should trust her too,_ the little voice inside him said.

 _No you shouldn't you stupid git, she's your enemy._

 _She was my enemy,_ that more gentle voice insisted.

He couldn't think of her as his enemy anymore.

They might be on different sides of the war, but at some point in the last two weeks he had started wanting not only for her to be safe but also for her and her friends to win the war.

It was the ultimate betrayal of everything he had been raised to believe and it was causing total chaos in his head and heart. Even though a part of him wished he wasn't in this situation Draco could no longer deny the fact that he genuinely wanted the order and the 'good guys' to win and put a permanent end to Voldemort.

 _If they win she will go back to be the with Weasel._

The thought turned Draco's stomach sour.

 _Did you forget that for a moment?_ His mind tormented. _She will never be yours she will never love you._

 _Love..._ Draco shook his head dismissing the word. He didn't want her love. Her forgiveness maybe but not love. Love wasn't an option.

"Draco?" Hermione's voice cut through the inner dialogue that was tearing Draco apart inside.

"Why do you call me that now?" he asked blinking at her and wondering how long he had been lost in his thoughts.

"What?"

"Draco, instead of Malfoy?"

"Oh...I hadn't realized..." he watched a flush creep up into Hermione face and she pulled the torn edges of her shirt closer to her. For a moment he had almost forgotten where they were and what he had just done to her. Tore her clothing in front of the Dark Lord and Greyback, made her believe that he was going to hurt her...

 _You also saved her,_ the gentle voice said so softly it almost wasn't a thought.

"Let me fix that," Draco offered, changing tracks inside his head he lifted his wand and with a flick of the wrist repaired her shirt.

She looked at him as if she were studying something that she couldn't quite grasp and then looked down smoothed her hands over the now repaired shirt.

"I'm sorry," he said, the words leaping off his tongue.

"Draco..." she said his name in a strangely sad tone and came closer.

Her hand touched his chest and Draco swallowed and resisted pulling back.

He wanted her touch, even though it burned him.

When Hermione moved her fingers Draco hissed as the fabric pulled against the cut she had inflicted with the kitchen knife.

"Oh..." he saw pain cross her face, at the reminder that she had hurt him, "I'm sorry Draco." She moved to pull her hand away and Draco's hand shot out and caught hers without him even thinking about it. He held her there, her palm pressed flat against the fabric of the shirt just over where she had cut him.

The pain, coming from her touch assuaged the guilt he felt.

"I deserved it," he said, trying to alleviate some of her own guilt.

"But...no," Hermione protested.

"It's okay," Draco insisted trying to say it firmly enough so that she would believe it.

"No it's not!" Her voice got louder. "I hurt you when all you were trying to do was help me," her eyes darkened and she looked off somewhere past Draco's shoulder.

"And I killed that man," she said, barely above a whisper.

Draco could see Hermione's thoughts start to spiral as she ripped her hand from beneath his grasp.

The movement made Draco squeeze his eyes shut briefly against the pain so that he wouldn't make a sound to upset her further.

When he opened his eyes only a split second later Hermione was several feet away holding both hands tightly to her chest.

"And Fred," she choked. "Fred is dead because of me."

"Don't" ordered Draco, stepping towards her. "Do NOT blame yourself for that," his voice was hard. He would not, could not stand by and watch her blame herself for someone else dying when it wasn't her fault.

"But it is my fault. If I had just stayed here locked up in your room... then they would have found me."

"If you had stayed you wouldn't be who you are," said Draco. He stepped close to her. "And who you are is someone worth saving."

His words caused the briefest of pauses as if they were both surprised at what he had just said.

"But..." Hermione went to protest.

 _No,_ thought Draco and cut her off needing to stop her from going down that road of self-blame. He knew it would destroy her if she let it.

"If you had stayed then The Dark Lord might have managed to kill Potter too," he said searching for anything he could say to dissuade her from villainizing herself.

"What's to stop him from doing it next time?" she asked. "I don't want more people dying because of me Draco."

"Well then we will work out a plan to make sure that doesn't happen next time."

"We can't guarantee someone won't get hurt or killed again."

"No, but we can optimize the odds."

"How?" her face was full of a struggle. He could practically see her building things up in her mind like little lego's trying to figure out how she could make everything perfect again.

"You're a brilliant witch Granger," said Draco simply "I am sure between the two of us we can come up with a plan that will work."

Granger's face went slack.

"What?" he asked, baffled by her sudden reaction.

"You just said..." her eyebrows knit together, "You called me brilliant."

Draco felt his cheeks colour.

 _I just said that out loud..._

 _What were you thinking you idiot,_ his darker side chastised.

 _Pretend like its nothing,_ he ordered himself.

"Well you are," Draco tried, and succeeded, in sounding dismissive. He turned away in case his face showed anything different.

"Everyone knows that," he added.

"But... you...you would never say that," said Hermione, still sounding disbelieving. "The Draco Malfoy I knew in school would never say I was brilliant."

"I'm not him anymore," Draco snapped and he whirled around to face her only to find that she had come near and was now well within his personal bubble.

 _She's so close…_

Draco could smell her perfume and gods…her wanted to kiss her, just dip his head down and meet those lips. Wrap his hands in that curly main of hers and just do it.

 _So do it,_ a part of him urged,

Draco backed away, stepping out of temptations reach.

"You should get some rest," he said trying to change the subject. "You've had a long day and so have I."

Hermione opened her mouth to say something else and Draco acted in self preservation.

He waved his wand and cast a sleeping spell on her before she could object.

He caught her and felt his legs wobble slightly.

 _Don't drop her._

 _You shouldn't just put her to sleep whenever you feel like it,_ the quiet side of him scolded.

 _I need space, and I need..._ Draco wasn't sure exactly what he needed but he knew that he needed a small break from the chaos.

She had been to close and he had almost just ruined everything by being...well himself.

Draco had always had a way with women and for the most part when he wanted to kiss them, he did just that.

It was almost always well received and rewarded with bouts of affection and feet lifting from floors.

However, Draco knew that it wouldn't be well received by Hermione and his mother had always taught him to respect women.

 _Which is why your mother currently so horrified at how far you have fallen away from what she taught you,_ he thought feeling a pang of despair.

He couldn't tell his mother the truth.

Not again, not without risking loosing everything.

Draco felt his lungs being squeezed in his chest and felt very near an anxiety attack.

He needed to eat something and escape to the wardrobe, the latter of which he couldn't do while Hermione was awake and watching.

The oasis was still his secret and his alone.

One of the few secrets he was happy to keep.

Draco looked down at the women sleeping peacefully in his arms.

"I've got you Granger," he said quietly and moved a curl away from her face.

Turning back into the corner of his room Draco lay her down on her pallet with a gentleness typically reserved for fine china.

He smoothed out the blankets and tucked her in. Habit had him moving to create the chain charm to hold her in place and found he couldn't bring himself to do it.

 _She'll stay..._ he thought to himself.

 _You can't know that, she could just try and run to them again._

It was a chance.

He swallowed.

It was a chance he was willing to take.

Hermione was trusting him, the least he could do was give her this little piece of trust in return.

* * *

Draco went downstairs.

There were still bodies strewn around in the main hall and he sidestepped them, his stomach turning as he recognized faces of both friend and foe…people on both sides of lines were getting harder and harder to distinguish. He made his way to the dining room where he could hear the voices of his family. They all fell silent as he entered the room. Draco took note of the fact that Snape was in attendance. He didn't remember seeing his mentor there during his time being tortured and wondered why he was here now.

"You should be resting," his mother said her voice hollow.

"Thank you but I feel quite refreshed from my recent activities," he said in a biting tone.

His mother's face tightened and she looked away.

Draco felt a stab of guilt for being cruel to his mother.

 _She's the reason why you had to create that illusion in the first place._

 _No, you are,_ he argued back. _You couldn't keep your big fat mouth shut._

"Is HE still here?" Draco asked turning to his aunt Bellatrix.

"The Dark Lord had other things to attend to," Bellatrix answered and Draco couldn't help but notice that she sounded slightly wistful.

 _Left behind were we?_ he found himself thinking viciously and was glad he had the wherewithal to bite his tongue against letting that particular sentence slip out.

He might hate her now, but he was smart enough to know that it was much better and safer to be his aunts little darling than it was to be her enemy.

"Well," said Draco. "I for one am famished."

"Then you should make yourself something to eat," said his mother tightly and she walked out of the room her heels clicking behind her.

"Sissy!" said Bellatrix. "What's wrong?"

There was no answer and Bellatrix turned towards Lucius.

"You better go after her and figure it out," she ordered. "I haven't got the time just now," she said and dissaparated.

Lucius glanced at Draco and Snape and then followed his wife out of the room.

There was an awkward silence and Draco met Snape's eyes.

"I heard what you did," said Snape.

"Did you?" shot Draco.

"Yes," Snape stepped towards him. "And I must say…." He glanced around. "I am impressed with how you handled yourself," he pulled out his wand and cast some kind of a barrier in the air and then stepped forward and grabbed Draco by the throat.

"I did not think you had it in you to stoop so low," Snape's voice came out an a very uncharacteristic growl.

"Let go," Draco ordered.

"She was an innocent girl."

"She still is!" Draco said through strangled chords.

Snape dropped him.

"Explain," Snape stepped back.

Draco coughed, Snape had not be gentle with him.

"I didn't know choking me counted as protection," said Draco rubbing his throat.

"You were never in any real danger and a good knock upside the head would likely help you use that brain of yours. Now, Explain."

"She's fine."

"Greyback himself saw what you did," said Snape, clearly not in the mood to play games.

"Greyback is a pig."

"In that we are in agreement," said Snape almost dismissively. "But it doesn't change what he saw."

"Well, eyes can't always be trusted," said Draco.

"Explain Malfoy," said Snape. "Before I lose my patience."

"It was an illusion alright?!" Draco snapped. "I made an illusion of what everyone expected me to do."

The shock was evident on Snape's face. After a moment shock gave way to disbelief and then Snape paused and disbelief shifted into understand as memory coming back to his mind.

"In fourth year you made an illusion of yourself to try and fool me in detention," he paused in his usual manner. "If I remember correctly that only lasted a few moments."

"Yes, well…I've gotten better and…" Draco pulled out his wand and handed it over to Snape. "This seems to be…helping."

It felt odd to hand over his wand, but Draco knew he needed his mentor as an ally in this and it seemed Snape had more decency in him than Draco had originally thought.

"I had heard you went to Paris for a new wand," Snape took the wand from Draco's hand and turned it over several times. "That is not a common wood."

"It's Ironwood," answered Draco.

"I have heard of wands made of ironwood. Resistant to knife, cutting, and yet with some flexibility if memory serves. There is nothing overly extraordinary about it other than the fact that it is not a common wand here. Overseas in the north Americas I hear it is more so."

"Yes well, I don't know about all that," said Draco with a shrug. "What seems to be more important is the core. It's supposedly made out of Pegasus hair."

"Pegasus don't exist," said Snape sounding almost bored.

"That's what my mother said."

Snape handed back the wand and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Look," said Draco growing weary of the conversation and at the same time worrying that someone was going to drop in on them soon. "I don't know if the woman at the wand shop, was telling the truth or not but she certainly seemed convinced of it herself."

"Does anyone else know?" asked Snape.

"Of course not," said Draco. "Even my own mother thinks that I chose to go upstairs and force myself upon my 'Prisoner'" said Draco making quotation marks in the air. "Its so nice to know just what she believes I am capable of."

"I believed it too, which is good because HE must never know that you lied to him."

"Don't you think I know that?" Draco challenged. "I'm not stupid and I have felt more than enough of his wrath thank you."

"So I heard," Snape uncrossed his arms. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Hardly," Draco admitted honestly and it was as if saying it out loud only made it more true. "I feel like I'm about to collapse any second."

"You should get some rest."

"I will, but I need to get some food first. Hermione hasn't eaten in more than a day and she's been through a lot."

Snape gave him a look.

"What now?" asked Draco tiredly.

"On a first name basis with her now are we?"

Draco realized his error and blanched.

Snape let Draco squirm under his scrutiny as he stepped forward well into Draco's space.

"Don't let your guard down Malfoy," said Snape. "If you want to protect her don't slip up like that again." With that he waved his wand and the sound barrier that had surrounded them disappeared.

"Are you going to stay here?" asked Draco.

"No," answered Snape. "I have a school to deal with," he said and then aparated in a swirl of black cloth.

"Goodbye to you too," mumbled Draco and then he set about finding some food.

* * *

Loaded up with a few items of food tucked under his arm Draco began to make his way back to his bedroom.

He stopped in the hallway as the sight of red hair caught his eye.

 _The Weasely boy…_

Draco walked over to the body of Fred Weasely.

 _You died for her,_ he thought looking at the Weasley boys face. There was a massive cut over his one eye which had clearly sliced through to bone and his face was bloody.

"She blames herself for your death," Draco said quietly _._

 _Should I blame myself for it too?_ The thought popped into his head unprompted and he tried to shake it away then he saw the barest of movements: so faint he had to wonder if he had seen it at all. Draco focused his eyes on Fred's back.

 _Did he just…breath?_

Draco's heartbeat increased and he felt a flush run through him.

Without thinking he reached forward and checked for a pulse. For a moment time froze.

He felt nothing.

And then…

A heartbeat.

* * *

 **Thanks so much for reading this chapter. If you liked it please leave a review.**


	20. Chapter 18: The Sanctuary

**A big thank you to everyone who has taken the time to give feedback over the course of this story thus far. I have put a lot of work into editing and as of right now have added over 10k+ in extra writing, scenes and edits. It is because of positive feedback and kind critiques that I have gone back in an attempt to make this story better. Thank you for the reviews.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. Reader Discretion advised.**

* * *

Chapter 18: The sanctuary

A heartbeat.

Slow and labored, yet clearly there beneath the fingers pressed into his neck.

 _He's alive…_ shock coursed through Draco's veins. Hermione's friend was alive.

 _Barely_ , his mind responded and Draco felt his own heartbeat race inside his chest. What was he supposed to do? Was he supposed to try and help this stranger...someone he had looked down on for years? Was he supposed to stick his neck out again for someone else. This wasn't Hermione. She was his exception. He didn't owe this Weasely anything.

 _But he is her friend,_ his mind argued.

Draco glanced around quickly. No one could see him. If they caught him helping...

The hall was empty, not a soul in sight, it was a relief and also terrifying.

"If you're going to do this you need to do it now," he said quietly to himself steeling up the nerves needed to take yet another risk.

Draco took hold of Fred roughly by both shoulders and apparated to his room. He was tired and the aparation was a little off center.

Draco landed with a thud and Fred on top and Draco gasped in pain as the weight of the older boy crushed his ribs.

"Fuck," Draco groaned and scrunched up his face.

He glanced at the pallet where Granger lay.

He could ask her for help. She would obviously help save her friend and he didn't have to worry about her blabbing. She would never betray someone she cared about. Not intentionally at least.

Draco opened his mouth to wake her and then stopped.

 _You can't let her know he's alive._

The knowledge slapped Draco in the face: If Fred didn't survive he would be putting her through losing him twice and he couldn't do that to her. If she felt guilty now that would be only a fraction of what she felt if she had to watch him die a second time. Draco knew he had to make sure that the Weasley boy was going to live before he let Hermione know that her friend was alive.

It took a considerable amount of effort from Draco to extract himself from beneath the body of the older and taller Weasely.

He saw stars as he stood and shook them off. He walked over to his wardrobe and unlocked it with a flick of his wrist before turning back to Fred. He wasn't about to try and carry Fred himself so he used a little magic to levitate the redhead before leading the floating body into his wardrobe.

Under any other circumstances Draco would have been freaking out about someone else being in his wardrobe.

For the first time in ages Draco hardly paid heed to the serenity his sanctuary offered. Today it was playing sanctuary to someone else.

Draco looked down at the peaceful water and waved his wand. He didn't speak any spell out loud, his wardrobe was in tune with what he wanted in a way that only magic created by his own had could be. A stone path rose up from the water giving Draco ease of passage to the hut.

Once he had crossed the threshold of his little island house he lay Fred down on the floor and went immediately over to his potions stash. Draco pulled out the first one he could for general healing and went over to Fred pouring it into his mouth.

The potion trickled out from the side of Fred's parted lips.

"You're going to have to use magic to make it go down," he said to himself aloud and waved his wand.

He watched as the magic of his spell caused Fred to swallow.

Draco breathed in deep and looked at the mangled area of Fred's eye. The blood had barely dried in some places, but the gnarled mass of blood an tissue by the socket told Draco that the eye itself was definitely beyond repair.

Draco swallowed feeling a little nausea. He had never been the best with things like this.

 _This is for Hermione,_ he told himself. Somehow that made it easier.

With a flick of wrist he cleaned the wound of debris. It began bleeding profusely and Draco tore a piece of his shirt and pressed it gently stifling the flow.

 _What the hell do I do now?_

He could barely remember what he had learned about magical first aid. It wasn't a class he had spent much time paying attention to except for when he had gotten to demonstrate mouth to mouth on one of his more attractive classmates. Draco smiled briefly at that memory. The teacher hadn't been overly impressed when mouth to mouth turned into making out. It wasn't his fault though…well not exactly anyways, she had kissed him-he had just responded. Draco smiled and brushed away the memory to focus on reality.

"Accio Healing salve," he ordered and one of the potions he had given Granger flew from the counter to his hand. He lifted the fabric away from the cut and poured the contents of the vial on Fred's eye. The boy didn't so much as flinch.

 _Its better this way_ , thought Draco, _he can't feel the pain while unconscious._

 _He might be in a coma._

 _He might now wake up._

Draco took a deep breath and watched as the cut knit back together.

It had been too long since the attack and Draco wasn't an experience healer.

The eye, which he had already known was beyond saving, faded away as the skin healed into a closed patch indented where the eye had once been. It wasn't a very pretty sight.

 _He wasn't that pretty to start with,_ a part of his mind thought sarcastically.

Draco paused.

 _That was a cruel thought._

The fact that he had stopped, the fact that he had noticed he was being cruel was out of the ordinary for Draco. It was how he had been raised, it was almost second nature to him.

Draco had never cared about being cruel to others, he had been told it kept people in their place. He had been told it showed where he stood on the pecking order especially in comparison to the likes of a Weasely.

 _Do you care about a Weasely now_? He scoffed.

Draco shook his head not wanting to think about it further.

Draco looked at his surrounding, the soft glow of the perpetual fire in the fireplace, and the dark wood of his book cases.

This was, above all else, Draco's safe space. No one knew it existed and e had every intention of keeping it that way. He was so exhausted though.

 _You need to make sure that if he wakes up he doesn't go snooping around your space._

Draco rubbed his face.

He would figure something out later, right now he just needed to close his eyes for a minute and close out the world.

Draco got up from Fred's side, knowing there was nothing more he could do for the moment, and lay down on the couch for a moment.

 _Just a few minutes rest,_ he told himself, _and then I'll figure everything out._

He was asleep the second his eyes closed.

* * *

The gentle sound of chimes woke Draco an hour later and he pushed himself groggily up from the couch, stretching. He let out a small groan feeling more than a little sore and tired.

"I'm about done with all this crap," he muttered to himself lowly and got up and went over to the far side of his little hut moving one of the bookcases aside.

Behind the case was a blank wall, nothing special.

With his wand Draco drew the outline of a door and then began weaving the magic to create a new room.

He took a pillow from the couch and turned it into a bed, a sliver from his chair and turned it into a table. He kept it simple and sparse. He added a water pitcher from the glassware in his bar and moved a lamp from the main room into this new space specially designed for Fred.

The lamp and water had been a last minute addition in case the Weasely boy woke before Draco came back, he knew a little light and some cool water would be a great comfort.

When he was finished he levitated Fred to the bed and lay him down.

"I hope..." Draco said, speaking to the unconscious boy "I hope for all our sake's you wake."

His words went unanswered in the tiny room.

 _Please get better,_ his mind silently added.

Draco sighed.

"Alright," he said aloud. "I need some way to watch over you."

Draco walked out into his main room and brought it back into Fred's room hanging it up on the wall. He cast a small enchantment turning the mirror a viewing window. Yes, it was to keep an eye on Fred in case he tried to escape, but it was also because... He wanted to be able to check on Fred and look in without having to come back to the Oasis each time.

 _I can't believe you're making such a fuss over a WEASELY,_ the snide voice inside Draco said.

"I'm just being practical," he answered back.

 _Sure you are._

When he was finished with everything Draco closed the door to Fred's room and locked it behind him putting the bookcase back into place in front of the room.

He sighed and sunk to the floor. The nap had barely helped, he felt utterly drained.

Performing all the magic wasn't helping either.

The wand he had made it easier. Spells he knew and knew well were flowing through him with an ease he had never known, and yet it was still draining to perform such tasks.

 _You're wearing yourself thin, and for what?_

 _For the chance to help her,_ he answered.

Draco turned away from his thoughts and stepped back out onto the beachfront. This time the fresh sea breeze reached him in a way it hadn't when he had brought Fred into his realm. Draco closed his eyes drawing the scent into his lings and trying to let the outside world fade away.

 _You are safe here,_ he told himself and for the first time in days he felt it-Safe.

 _You should bring her here..._

 _No_ , he answered back.

He wasn't ready for Hermione to see this.

This was the one place in the world that he felt safe and he wasn't ready to let anyone know it even existed let alone let someone in.

 _And yet you brought Fred Weasely here..._ His snarkier side said.

 _That's different. He'll never see this part of my place or even know where he is at all._

Draco climbed the large rock on which his towel perpetually rested and leaped into the water fully clothed diving in deep. His body sliced through the water and he touched bottom launching himself forward. The salt in the water stung like a bitch in his cut but he savored the feel of it.

She had apologized for the cut.

 _Silly little lioness..._

He was happy for the cut, it was some kind of payback and it-in a strange way-felt good to have her hit him back. It was also a sign that she still had a fight to her. He wanted her to keep fighting. No, He _ **needed**_ her to keep fighting.

 _She killed a man..._ his darker side whispered.

 _Self defense,_ he answered back. _And you need to make sure she keeps believing that. You need to keep the good alive._

 _Since when is it your responsibility to keep what's good alive?_

Draco broke through the surface with a great gasp and stared at the gorgeous night sky, the rotating planets and gently floating galaxies all magnified to hundreds of times larger than what the naked eye could see outside in the real world. He rolled through the water on to his back floating and staring up at the stars.

When had it become his responsibility to keep the good in her alive?

 _It isn't your responsibility...it's your choice..._

Draco breathed in deep and drifted along with the gentle current of his world which took him in a slow circle around the island.

On his second time floating around he heard the distant sound of chimes signalling his second hour in the oasis.

Begrudgingly Draco rolled on to his front and hissed slightly as fresh salt hit the cut. He had to go back.

When Draco reached the island he stripped down and went inside tapping on the counter immediately to reveal his potions stash.

He plucked out a salve and rubbed it into his various cuts and bruises enjoying the tingling cool sensation. Then he pulled out a second vial and drank down the contents of the healing potion. When he was finished he looked at the vial.

He had struggled with healing potions and some of the potions more associated with light, good magic. He had always been able to manage them, but not with the same potency of some of his other potions.

 _You'll never be good enough to do pure good magic._

Like a Patronus... he had never managed that one.

Draco had tried on his own, many times, and failed.

 _That's because you don't have that many happy memories to draw from._

 _Haven't made any more since you last tried either._

He had been pissed off when he first heard rumors that the other students in 'Dumbledore's army' had managed them. Pissed enough to go back to his dorm room, lock the door and

practiced for hours. Nothing more than a wisp of light had come from his wand, not enough to even discourage a dementor, not that he had ever been really worried about one being set on him. As the son of Lucius Malfoy he had never been in danger of that.

 _But what about now?_ he wondered.

He had been doing plenty of magic like that lately though...

He glanced at his wand

"Are you doing the good or am I?"

Now that was a question.

And it was a question Draco was not ready or willing to deal with.

The healing potion made him sleepy and Draco looked longingly at the couch and debated sleeping there.

 _You can't leave her out there alone._

Draco sighed and glanced down at the contents of his secret stash of potions.

He was running dangerously low on healing potions and salves which meant he would need to make more soon for Fred…and possibly himself and Hermione.

He was happy for something to do to take his mind off things though. Working on Potions had always helped him clear his head.

With one final glance at his little hut he turned and he left his sanctuary behind.

* * *

When Draco closed the door to the wardrobe behind him he found it hard to lock it and leave it.

He closed his eyes leaning against the cool contoured wood. He could still smell the salt of his ocean and wanted to just go back inside and get lost in the waves and the peace. Knowing Fred was there the whole time made it so that he hardly felt as refreshed as he usually did coming back from his oasis.

When Draco opened his eyes he turned to see Granger stirring on her pallet. Her movements slow as the spell dissipated.

She woke little by little, rubbing her eyes she sat up looking at him. He saw the moment she became fully conscious. Her features which had been relaxed tightened into a scowl.

"Why did you make me sleep?" she half demanded.

"Because you needed to sleep and I needed to tend to my wounds," he answered simply.

"You could have just asked me to go lay down."

 _I couldn't let you see where I was going._

"I could have," he answered instead, sidestepping that little tidbit of information. "I was tired and strained and not thinking straight," Draco rubbed the spot behind his ear "Listen, It may take me a little while to get used to the idea that you know the truth."

Hermione grimaced.

"What?" he asked.

"I only know part of the truth," she said and pushed away the covers drawing her knees to her chest. "You still never told me what happened the day you took from me."

"I told you it was nothing."

"Draco," her tone was half scolding. "If you want me to trust you, you have to be honest with me."

"I am," he said moving away.

"Then tell me what happened!" she insisted.

Draco shook his head.

"You are so stubborn, why can't you just trust that it was fine?" he asked.

He wanted her to drop it. He wanted her to just leave it be. Why couldn't she just leave it be?

"BECAUSE I CAN'T Okay!" Hermione shouted at Draco.

He darted forward and covered her mouth with his hand.

He looked up at her glaring eyes. Her mouth shifted beneath his hand and for a moment he was worried she was going to bite him.

Okay, so this clearly meant more to her than he had originally thought. He knew she wanted to know what had happened, but that didn't mean Draco wanted her to know. There was nothing as dark as she was thinking but...that day...she had gotten so close. She had reached out and touched him...comforted him in a way that had made him want to cling to her and had ended in him pushing her away.

She was mad at him for keeping it from her and she clearly wouldn't take 'nothing' as an answer, even if she did trust him it was clear to Draco that she wouldn't let it go. At this point he very much doubted she would believe him if he just told her the truth that he had taken away the day simply because she had found out that he was trying to protect her.

Draco removed his hand slowly giving her a look that clearly said 'don't yell.'

"Tell me," she said quietly.

If only it were so simple.

If only he could just 'tell her'

It wouldn't be enough, Draco knew it wouldn't be enough.

"I won't," he answered.

Hermione's face darkened and he felt her pull away and close herself off from turned away from him angrily.

"Wait," Draco said grabbing her before she could pull away completely.

She glanced at him over her shoulder, her eyes daring him. She looked like she was about to take a swing at him if he didn't say the right thing or let her go.

"Let me..." Draco swallowed nervously.

 _You can't do this,_ part of his mind warned, but he had already made his decision.

 _You can't it's to dangerous!_ The smallest, darkest parts of him that he kept hidden away screamed at him begging him not to do this.

Hermione seemed to sense his struggle and her whole demeanor gentled. Some how it both eased and intensified his anxiety.

"Let you what Draco?" she asked softly, touching his hand where it was wrapped around her arm.

Draco looked down and became conscious of the fact that he was still holding her he let go and both their arms dropped.

He looked down at the floor.

 _Don't do this._

He lifted his chin and met her eyes.

 _You have to do this or she won't ever really trust you._

 _I don't want to let her in_ , It scared the crap out of him because it was only partially true: a piece of him _**did**_ want to let her in.

He closed his eyes.

 _There will be no going back,_ a part of him warned.

"Let you what Draco?" Hermione asked again.

Draco lifted his head and met her gentle eyes.

"Let me show you."

* * *

 **I remember when I fist wrote this chapter, it took me a long while to figure out the flow and pacing. Going back now to edit it, I think I did a pretty good job the first time but still had a lot of work to do to polish it up for real.**

 **I hope you enjoyed it.. And yeah…Fred is alive! At least for now. I love the twins and it gutted me when he died in the books. I said a couple of chapters ago that I'm trying to stay close in my 'what if?' but it _IS_ a 'what if' and it is my fanfiction and I love the twins soooooo, I get to write him back to life, with a nod to the fact that he did die in cannon, but does not have to remain so here in the realm that is my fanfiction.**


	21. Chapter 19: The Lost Day

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed including:** LillsBills, alluringmango, ChildofBrisingr, Starearth, mmiller0000, tomfeltonswifey, addictedtoloveandfiction, Scorpia11, Aid4, 7aurora9, hermionelover778 **and a thank you to all the "Guests" and everyone else who has taken the time to review since. You are all appreciated very much.**

 **This chapter is dedicated to:** inkwolf199, **thank you so much for your reviews and enthusiasm and support. You are awesome and you seriously brighten my day every time I see one of your messages or reviews. This chapter is for you-I hope you enjoy it, I chose this one especially for your dedication because I think you may like it ;) Let me know. Cheers.**

 ***Trigger Warning: This story contains Violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation, torture etc. I do not want anyone hurt by my writing so please if you can't handle those things then do not read.**

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Chapter 19: The Lost Day

 _"Let me show you."_

Hermione stood shell shocked at Draco's words.

A part of Draco regretted offering it as soon as the words had left his mouth, but he couldn't take them back, not now.

"I don't know legillimency," said Hermione shaking her head. Draco could barely read her expression because her face was blank as if she were in shock.

"But you've studied it haven't you?" he asked her intently.

"Yes," she admitted.

"Well..." Draco took a breath.

 _You shouldn't do this, you shouldn't even be thinking about doing this,_ the voice inside him yelled.

 _She needs to know,_ he answered back.

 _Or what? You don't owe her a look inside your head._ A part of Draco was absolutely rioting inside. Scared shitless about what he was offering. That side of him was like a wild animal raging at the bars trying to prevent what was happening from actually happening.

 _I owe her everything..._

Draco looked at Hermione and knew, that even though he wanted to vomit he was so nervous he was doing the right thing. He only wished it could feel good doing the right thing instead of feeling like orchestrating his own funeral.

"Try looking in," said Draco.

It took everything within him not to turn heel and run from her, and pretend this had never happened

"I'll let you in…" he said, his voice low. "Like you asked."

Hermione resisted the inclination to let her jaw hit the floor.

Draco Malfoy, who played everything close to the chest and had been keeping even the fact that he cared for her secret from absolutely everyone, save for Snape, was offering her a chance to try and look into his mind.

 _This is insane,_ she thought bewildered.

"I'll be open," he continued and she could see how hard it was for him to force the words out. "I won't hold it back from you or push you out. Just..." he ran a hand through his hair. "Please don't go digging through other things."

There was something…a kind of skittish anguish in his voice that made Hermione wonder what he was hiding and if it was something he was hiding from her specifically or from the world.

 _Do you really want to look inside his head?_ A part of her questioned.

 _What if I hurt him somehow?_

Hermione valued intelligence and using one's head and the idea of going into someone else's head was simultaneously fascinating, intriguing and terrifying.

What would she see inside Draco?

What if she messed it up somehow?

"I..." she started to protest.

She couldn't do this, it was too risky she had never practiced.

"You're a talented and capable witch Hermione, you know how it works. I have faith in you and your abilities," Draco admitted "And I am guessing this Bind between will make it easy for you to tune into me."

 _That's the second time he has paid you a compliment._

 _You should check for a fever,_ her snide side said sarcastically.

Still, Draco's words made sense to Hermione and the truth was she had studied legilimency and occulancy at length. She hadn't, however, practiced it because she felt going into someone's mind wasn't morally right and because she hadn't had a partner to practice blocking things out.

"How do you know it?" she asked, shifting the subject for a moment.

"Snape," answered Draco. "My mother thought it was important and asked him to train me. He started several years ago with me."

Draco did not mention that his aunt Bellatrix was the one who had first taught him Occulancy and that Snape had only helped polish the skills. He didn't want to remind Hermione of his aunt and that he was so close to the woman who had carved into her flesh.

Hermione thought of Harry and how Harry had talked to her about trying to keep the dark Lord out and here was Draco having done the same training for years. She wondered if Draco was any good at the art.

 _He probably is, he had Snape for a teacher._

"Have you looked into my mind before?" she asked suddenly curious.

"No," Draco answered with a shake of his head. "And I won't, not now and not unless you ask me to in the future at some point."

Hermione believed him.

"Promise?"

"I promise," Draco ran his hand through his hair again, his nerves showing. "Now do you want to see...the day." Hermione heard the break in his voice and she looked at him quizzically.

 _This is probably the first time he has let anyone in like this,_ she told herself. Of course he would be nervous.

 _He's letting you in._

 _No, he's just showing me what he stole from me, there is a difference_ , she told herself, but it didn't feel like there was a difference.

It felt vulnerable.

He had used those words, he had said he was letting her in, that's why it felt so vulnerable.

Draco reached into his robe and handed her a wand that she didn't recognize.

"Where did you get this?" she asked frowning.

"During the fight in the Forbidden forest," he answered. "I thought it might come in useful. I think I won its loyalty it seems quite flexible, so it should work for you at my request."

Hermione turned the wand over in her hand looking at the light brown of the wood. It was a simple design with a waver mid shaft.

"You should keep it," said Draco. "But please don't use it unless you absolutely have to. If they find out that you had a wand and even suspect I knew or gave it to you I won't be able to protect either of us."

"I understand."

Draco stepped towards her.

"I'm trusting you Granger," he said looking at her intently.

He gave a moment for the words to sink in.

Draco blinked down at her and Hermione felt her mouth go dry at the intensity of his gaze.

Then Draco swallowed and then his eyelids dipped down over his eyes leaving him standing defenseless-completely open- in front of her.

 _You could kill him and escape._

 _What?_ Hermione was shocked at herself for even thinking it and hated herself for the thought immediately.

 _I would never,_ she answered. _He is...my protector._

She raised the wand and then envisioned herself moving forward.

Suddenly Hermione saw herself through Draco's eyes in Draco's bed. He was shirtless and his chest heaving from a nightmare.

"DRACO" Hermione saw herself call his name and she felt the pain in his cheek as if it were her own.

It seemed very odd feeling the pain from a memory.

Was it supposed to be like that with legillimency?

Everything felt very...intense.

"Did you just slap me?" The memory-Draco asked, rubbing at the stinging flesh of his cheek.

"I tried to shake you awake but that only made things worse. I'm sorry," She watched her past self's head dropped slightly.

Draco paused realising she genuinely sounded sorry about slapping him.

His shoulders relaxed, dropping visibly.

"Its fine, don't worry about it."

 _What was that?_ Thought Hermione, balking at his reaction. Since when did he just write her slapping him as okay? Present day Hermione reeled within Draco's mind slightly.

She looked at her own face in the memory and recognized her expression of appreciation at the shirtless body in front of her. Then she felt Draco notice her appreciation present day Hermione felt the desire flow through him.

Shock coursed through Hermione. Since when did Draco want her?

 _Not a chance Draco. You are seeing things._

Hermione heard his thought's from that night as clearly as if he had spoken it allowed to her today.

Hermione yanked herself back from Draco mind and found herself once again standing in Draco's bedroom across from her.

His eyes were open and staring at her.

"I thought you were just supposed to be showing me the Memories Draco. Like a viewing mirror-like what Dumbledore had in his office," she half accused, her mind reeling.

She had wanted Draco, Draco had wanted her.

Even if he didn't want to be with her in any 'real' way the lust she had seen in his mind was real and undeniable.

"That's what it's supposed to be like," Draco answered. "I don't know why you can hear my thoughts, it's just supposed to me like watching a movie" he looked upset. "I don't know what's going on…it's…" his face fell and his tone got serious. "It's probably the bind."

"Can you turn it off?" Hermione asked.

"I don't think I can," he answered. "Not without shutting you out." He swallowed and his hand went up into his hair again, this time she saw it tremble a little.

"You don't have too," Hermione found herself saying without thinking.

She immediately wanted to take the words back.

She needed to know what had happened, but now she was torn about wanting to see because it was incredibly obvious that Draco was really struggling with her seeing inside his head.

"I took the day, you deserve to see it. I'll be fine,"

Hermione could almost feel him shut down that part of himself from view.

"Just watch," he ordered.

Draco reached out to her and wrapped his elegant fingers around her hand. His touch was cool and firm. She felt the contact like a lightning bolt through her system and he eyes locked with Draco's.

Something told her that he felt it too.

Hermione's heartbeat began to race inside her chest as Draco just stood there looking at her holding her hand. He looked down at where they were touching and then lifted her hand slowly so that the wand was facing him once more.

"Remember," he said. "Just the memory, don't go elsewhere. Please," he sounded more vulnerable now than before.

Hermione knew the added fear and vulnerability was because of the strange addition of the emotions and thoughts that the Bind had brought to her viewing of the memory. It wasn't just that he was letting her see what had happened, it was that he was letting her see what had happened and hear every thought and feel every feeling associated with those memories.

"I'm trusting you," he said and his voice rolled over her.

Hermione nodded mutely and watched as Draco closed his eyes once more.

She breathed in and suddenly she was back in the memory.

She saw past Draco reach out and touch her cheek, saw her own hand come up and cover his. Past Hermione leaned into Draco and Present Hermione watched herself comfort Draco.

 _You were clearly an idiot more than once,_ she said to herself and she felt a slice of pain and knew Draco had heard her the thought.

"I'm sorry," she said allowed and it almost threw her out of the memory.

 _Its fine_ , Draco thought at her pulling her back into his mind firmly.

The emotions of the memory mixed with what she was feeling now. There was so much going in both their heads and it was getting hard to distinguish who was feeling what when. Overwhelmed Hermione could do nothing but sit back and watch the memory unfold.

She watched as he jerked away when he realised he was about to cry.

 _You are not going to cry in front of Granger._

"Don't," Past Draco said and got out of bed.

"Draco wait…"

"You can't" Past Draco said not looking at her. "You can't do that."

"I'm sorry, I was only trying to make it better."

"You don't understand," he turned back to her. "Nothing you can do will make it better," his voice broke. "You'll be better off to hate me," he said and shook his head.

Hermione felt how thankful past Draco was for the near dark in the memory because his eyes were brimming and he didn't dare let her close enough to see or ever know.

 _I'm going to have to hurt you to prove to them I'm on their side. You'll hate me then. But it will hurt you less if you hate me now._

"Draco," Past Hermione crawled off the bed and came towards him. She put a hand on his chest and he shuddered. She reached up to his face and he pulled back violently before she could feel the wetness there.

 _You were crying?_ Present Hermione asked inside her head.

 _Hermione, please just watch_ , Present Draco answered in her mind she could hear all the pain laced in the words.

It was all too much. Hermione felt the lines of the memory blur and then come back into focus.

"I can't…" Past Draco said.

"Draco it's okay," she tried to assure him.

"Not it's not!" he yelled back. "I don't want to hurt you."

His words hung in the air like lead.

Hermione choked and blinked in real life.

The memory continued.

She heard the knock at the door watched Draco tie her up and leave with his mother. Then she watched the conversation he had with his mother and felt him rebel against Narcissa's words.

She saw his thoughts as he walked up the stairs back to her. Felt the plan form in his mind.

 _The second the dark Lord looks at her, her eyes are going to give you both away._

An uncomfortable prickle made its way down past Draco's neck. Hermione felt it echo across her neck in the present.

She felt his emotions, knew that he knew what he had to do and felt how it made his stomach feel like it was full of spikes.

 _She'll hate you for it,_ she heard him think.

 _She'll never know, and it will save you both._

Past Draco mustered his courage and went into the room. He knelt down in front of Granger and undid the gag and her ties by hand.

"Did you have to leave me like that?" she saw herself ask rubbing at her wrists.

"Yes," he answered. "If my mother had walked back in and seen you walking about it would have…been bad." He stepped away from her and turned on the light.

"Did you mean it?" she asked standing and coming over to him.

 _It won't hurt to tell her the truth now._

"Yes," he answered, not bothering to play dumb at her question. "I hate having you here."

The Hermione viewing the memories slumped.

He really did hate her. It was so at odds with what the emotions from the memories were saying. It was at odds with what he was doing now-letting her in like this.

You didn't let someone you hated just see inside your head, not like this.

"But for the reason you think," Past Draco admitted.

Present Hermione felt her heart beat quicken.

"What?" She watched her own brows knit together.

She could feel how he wanted to tell her the truth. Feel it building inside his mind before he opened his mouth to speak, like a flood that could no longer be held back by the dam.

"I hate having you here because I wish you were off somewhere safe, away from all of this," the words tumbled out of past Draco's mouth.

"You mean that don't you?"

"Yes," he nodded.

"I found some crumpled notes today, I was looking through your trash bin," she watched herself as she stumbled over the words and saw her cheeks redden.

She felt Draco's stomach drop abruptly.

His cheeks flamed with anger and embarrassment thinking of the other things he had written and tossed into the trash. She heard him think about the poetry the despair the truth of how he hated his life and Voldemort.

"Please don't be mad," Past Hermione pleaded and reached out touching his bicep. "I was bored. I've been dying up here for days with nothing to do, nothing to read and no one to talk to. I needed something to keep myself from going completely mental." She babbled quickly.

"So you thought you'd snoop through my stuff," his tone was a little more accusatory than he intended.

"What did you expect?" she asked exasperated and let go of his arm.

"I don't know I just…don't like people in my business," he shoved a hand through his hair, a motion present Hermione now recognised as one of duress. "But I get it."

She saw herself soften.

"You wrote that you were sorry."

Draco nodded.

"You wrote that you had made me breakfast yourself. Is that true too?"

"Yes."

"Does anyone else know?" Past Hermione asked stepping close.

"No," he practically whispered.

She was so close, he could smell the sweet scent of her skin mixed with the smell of his shampoo. It was a lovely combination.

Present Hermione reeled.

"Are you trying to protect me Draco?" Past Hermione asked looking up at him.

 _Don't say it, don't you dare say it._ She heard him think.

 _This might be the only chance you get to say it without worrying about the consequences._

 _Don't…_

"Yes," he answered truthfully, half undone by the admission.

"Thank you," she said and reached up tentatively to touch his face. Draco couldn't help but lean into the caress.

"I'm sorry Granger, for everything."

"You are aren't you?" she said eyes examining him intensely.

Present Hermione could feel it, feel just how sorry he was, just how much he regretted what was to come and what he had done.

"I am," he nodded. _More than you will ever know._ Emotions swirled chaotically inside him knowing what was to come.

"I believe you."

Past Hermione leaned up on her tippy-toes and pressed her lips to Draco's cheek. Draco shuddered closing his eyes.

He savored the feel of her lips on his skin. Savored it knowing he would likely never feel it again.

 _I'm sorry Granger_

He raised his wand while she was still tucked in close and whispered "Obliviate."

The memory froze and Hermione turned her head away from it and from the pain that she was feeling on her own and from the pain she could feel radiating from inside Draco.

Suddenly the scene changed.

This memory felt different, colder.

Hermione found herself in Draco's room.

It was darker and the decor very dated.

She saw a young Draco Malfoy, and recognized his haircut from their first year at Hogwarts. He looked so sad, tears staining his pale cheeks which were not yet as sharp and chiseled as the man who was her jailer and protector.

"I'm sorry Father," he said his voice small and filled with shame.

"You ungrateful little brat," The cane came down and Hermione felt the shock reverberate through her, the through the bond she felt the fear and pain of the memory and the distress coming from Present Draco at her seeing it.

 _No,_ she heard Draco's voice across the bind and felt him try to push back, but the memory was too vivid and it was holding Hermione's attention keeping her inside his head.

"You shame us!" The cane fell again.

Hermione cried out feeling young Draco's pain as if she herself was experiencing the strike of the cane. More than that, she felt the pain and shame coming from a tiny scared Draco hurt by his father's words as much as from the strikes.

With great shove Hermione felt herself forced from Draco's mind.

"I told you not to look further," Draco yelled, his voice cracking.

"Draco I'm so sorry, " she reached for him.

She hadn't meant to intrude. She hadn't gone looking for this, she had just turned away from one memory and found herself in another.

"Don't," Draco slapped her hand away and she realized just how much he had endured in his life and how raw he must have been from letting someone see something he had successfully hidden all these years.

Never once had she heard about Draco being beaten by his own father.

Never once had anyone even suggested such a thing.

She looked at him and it became painfully obvious that Draco was used to hiding, and had been forced to for so long that he was good at it. Had needed to become good at it. That was the reason why he hadn't trusted her to know he cared.

In comparison to him she wore her heart in her sleeve.

 _I had no idea..._

 _This is why he asked you not to look._

 _This is why he was so scared to let you in._

She looked at Draco and saw that he was still shaky from the memory. She watched a fine tremble go thought his hands before he clasped them tightly together to hide the tremor.

 _No child deserves that,_ thought Hermione _. No one._

She began to wonder, if it weren't for his father's abuse would Draco have been kinder?

If it weren't for his parents influence would Draco have been the kind of person she would have been friends with?

And what about everything she had felt as he was remembering? She was thankful for the Bind for once because it had shown her the truth, as overwhelming as that had been she had felt how real it was and knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that Draco cared more than he would ever admit out loud.

"I know you think I deserve it," said Draco shaking her from her thoughts.

"No Draco," she protested and reached out for him again. He pulled away from her, this time less harshly.

"I do deserve it," he said. "Don't lie."

"I'm not Lying Draco," Hermione protested. "No one deserves that."

"I've done worse to you."

She couldn't deny that even though she wanted to.

"What you did was different," she managed.

"Worse," he said again.

Hermione didn't know what to say even though she wanted to say something, anything to make it better.

"I'm a monster," his eyes remained downcast.

"No you aren't Draco," Hermione grabbed Draco and wrapped her hands around the back of his neck holding his head in her hands.

He tried to pull away but there wasn't much effort behind the movement.

She could tell he was exhausted and still weak and more than that the vision had taken its toll on him. It had taken a toll on her as well, but not in the same way.

"Draco look at me," she said when he wouldn't meet her gaze.

"I can't," he said. "I don't want to see the hate in your eyes."

"Draco. Look at me," she ordered firmly. "You owe me that at least." She hated playing the guilt card but she needed him to look at her so he could look into her eyes and know that she meant her words. She needed him to hear that he didn't deserve it, that she didn't think he was a monster.

He looked at her and those piercing eyes were glittering sharply.

Suddenly all words were gone. Everything she was planning on saying died on her lips as she looked at all the pain in him.

 _He has endured so much and yet it hasn't turned him all dark, look at what he is willing to risk to save you._

Hermione raised herself up onto her tip toes…

And then Hermione Granger kissed Draco Malfoy.

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 **And this is where I leave you: With Hermione and Draco's first real, full, waking kiss. Thank you so much for reading. Please leave some love in a review if you liked this chapter.**


	22. Chapter 20: The Kiss

**A big thank you to everyone who reviewed since the last update especially:** LillsBills, alluringmango, tomfeltonswifey, addictedtoloveandfiction, gpullen, DramioneDestiny, to-be-slytherin, Ayr, Rankin de Merthyr, Elliebeanz, EndlessReign, Addfam2008, cmtaylor531, Aid4 **and to the guests** "Who" **and** "Guest" as well as everyone who has taken the time to review since.

 ***Trigger Warning: This story contains Violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation, torture etc. I do not want anyone hurt by my writing so please if you can't handle those things then do not read.**

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Chapter 20: The Kiss

Her lips were softer than Draco had imagined, more perfect. Shock coursed through his veins as Hermione kissed him.

 _It's a dream, you have to be dreaming_ , he told himself.

But it wasn't a dream her lips were there pressed gently against his. Her hands around his face while his still hung at his sides.

Everything in Draco's world narrowed down to her-just her, only her.

For a moment she became his whole world.

He wanted nothing more than to pull her closer, take over the kiss, wrap his arms around her, tease those perfect lips open and taste her.

He wanted them to just be together.

It was the first time that Draco realized that was what he wanted. He wanted to be with Hermione.

Instead he yanked himself back.

"Draco?" He could hear the worry in her voice.

 _You can't kiss her, she isn't yours to kiss._

 _You don't deserve her,_ the darker voice said.

 _You can't let her throw herself away on you._

 _You need to make sure it doesn't happen again._

 _But I want it to happen again,_ the smallest part of him protested.

After everything that had just happened, after feeling her inside his head. After the chaos of reliving that day and the vulnerability of her being able to see and feel everything that he had felt it was just too much.

It felt like he was a storm tightly bound inside his skin and the hurricane within was threatening to rip him wide open. She was going to rip him wide open with her sweet caring with her…Pity.

Pity.

Draco's blood turned cold and a shudder past through him.

That kiss hadn't been one of passion.

It wasn't something that she had done because she wanted him, not really.

That kiss had been nothing but her trying to comfort the pathetic child she had seen in his memory and Draco did not want her pity-not now, not ever. He didn't want anyone's pity, least of all hers.

 _See what she thinks of you now? Now that she's seen._

 _This is why you never let anyone know, this is why you never let anyone see._

"What the fuck Granger?" Draco demanded stepping back from her. "What makes you think I want that?" he demanded wiping his lips with the back of his shirt.

He wanted it.

Gods he wanted it more than he wanted to keep breathing, but he wanted it to be real.

He wanted her to want him as himself not because she felt bad for him.

The kiss he had wanted to fall into and surrender to now tasted like poison on his lips.

"I...you..I thought..." she stammered clearly flustered by his reaction.

"No you didn't think," said Draco. "Clearly." Draco scoffed.

The pain in his chest was too much and a piece of the storm inside him lashed out at her.

"Do you honestly think I would go through all the trouble of not sleeping with you just to have you throw yourself at me?"

"That was different Draco and you know it," Granger shot back.

She was right and they both knew it. Draco refused to acknowledge it though.

"So?" he looked at her. "Why did _**you**_ kiss me huh?" he demanded, the pain in his head from the past was bleeding into the present. The pain from endless nights under his father's cane. Nights that had been caused by falling second to the woman in front of him. His rational mind didn't blame her, but she was pushing too close to him-touching and seeing places no one was ever supposed to see. These were his secrets to keep. No one was ever supposed to know.

"I…" Hermione started to answer and Draco cut her off.

"Pity for the past?" his voice dripped venom. "Do you think I want your pity?"

"It wasn't pity!" Hermione yelled back, her voice getting higher.

"Oh like hell it wasn't" Draco's own words were ringing true in his ears.

 _It was only pity, you were stupid to even think for a second it wasn't._

 _You were stupid to think that someone like her could ever, would ever, want to kiss you for any of the reasons you want._

"You've never kissed me before," he shot. "And then you went snooping where you weren't supposed to after you promised not to." His voice almost broke and he thanked Merlin it didn't crack.

He couldn't bear to break in front of her now.

Draco held tightly to the anger and let it keep the rain form falling.

"You saw poor little hurt baby Draco and you decided now was the time to plant one on me."

"Why are you being such an asshole!" she looked genuinely upset.

 _She's only upset because you spurned her attempt at comfort. She's good and she wanted to comfort you, that's all that kiss was._

"I'm not," Draco countered. "You're just used to pansy red-haired prats like your boyfriend." The words were out of his mouth before he had a chance to think and he regretted them immediately. He regretted bringing up the person who she was supposed to love when all he wanted was her.

"Fuck you Malfoy!" she yelled shoving hard against his chest.

He nearly toppled, still woozy from all the wounds.

"There we go back to last names again," he shot at her.

"You bring out the worst in me," said Hermione with bite.

"Yeah well you bring out the best in me," he instantly regretted saying it.

 _Way to undo everything you just did and discredit everything you said._

 _You need to get back in control. You are out of control and that is not like you._

 _She's the reason you're spinning out,_ he shoved the blame on her in his mind, as a way of coping.

"If that is the best of you then I pity anyone who has to deal with the worse," answered Granger.

Her words sliced into him.

 _Fuck._

Draco swallowed and took a deep breath.

"Yeah, well apparently you have to deal with that part too," he said lowly. "I told you I was a monster remember, right before you kissed me." He made a half shrug. "What does that say about the both of us?"

The wind and fire went out of her sails, but it was clear she was still frustrated with him.

"You can't keep yo-yoing like this on me Draco," she said half stern, half comforting.

"You think I like being in less than perfect control?" he asked and shook his head.

 _I hate It._

 _I can't stand what you do to me._

 _You make everything worse._

 _She also makes everything better,_ his mind countered.

 _She makes you better,_ It was the truth. She did make him better, but the pain of being better was like a growing pain, aching and throbbing inside his very bones.

"I know you don't like how things are Draco, so let's make things a little more simple."

Wariness crept into Draco's spine.

"I'm listening," he said out loud crossing his arms over his chest and feeling the pain of the cut on his chest as he did so.

"Can we please agree to just both try and get through this as a team?" her eyebrows knit together pleading up at him. "I won't kiss you again," she said with conviction. "I'm sorry I overstepped my bounds with that." She paused. "And I'll do my best to pretend to hate you in front of everyone else and put on a good show," she added lamely to the end. "Okay?"

"Fine," he answered flatly.

 _She shouldn't kiss you anyways no matter how much you want it._ _It's not safe for her._

It wasn't safe for her and Draco knew it would only make things harder for him. He already had a hard enough time hurting her to save her. He couldn't imagine what it would be like if…

"And..." Hermione added.

"And what?" he asked leaving his train of thoughts behind.

"And I want you to promise to be honest with me from this point forward."

Her words struck him.

 _I can't promise that,_ he thought. _There is no way that I can promise that._

"Why on earth would you ask me for that?" he demanded, shocked at her request.

"Because you asked me if I trusted you and I told you I did," she answered. "But in order to keep trusting you I need to know that you will be honest with me."

"You don't want the truth," he scowled.

"Yes I do," she answered.

 _You really don't._

"No woman wants the truth," he said rolling his eyes.

 _You don't want to know that I dream of you._

 _That I think of you, even when you're not around_

 _That I would do almost anything to protect you._

 _That you are changing me in ways I don't even understand._

Draco shook away the thoughts.

"That's bullshit Draco," it was Hermione's turn to cross her arms over her chest. "Some women do actually want people to be honest with them."

"And the same women who say that turn around and get mad the second that you are honest with them," Draco countered. "I've had my share of women. I should know."

Hermione's cheeks turned crimson.

"That's…" Draco looked heavenward.

 _Merlin's beard Granger, you saw me in school. You know how I was. You don't have to blush like that just because I mention having experience with women in the past._

Draco looked back at Granger trying to get back some control of things.

He addressed what she had asked for.

"Let's say I believe you are the exception and actually want honesty, it doesn't change the fact that I can't be honest in front of the dark Lord and his followers," Draco amended." I can't even be honest around my mother right now."

"Be honest around me."

"I just said-"

"Just around me," she cut him off. "If you have to lie and say something horrible in front of them then do it. But please swear to me that you'll at least give me the truth when we are alone."

He looked down at her pleading eyes.

 _You can give her that much._

But could he?

Draco hadn't exactly led a perfectly honest and upstanding life to this point. For her though...

"Alright," he agreed before he could overthink it.

She didn't ask him for much. Hadn't asked him for hardly anything. If this was what she wanted, ill-advised as it was, he couldn't deny her.

"Really?" her eyebrows rose happily, though she was trying to supress the fact that she was happy about it. "Swear it," she said her face going serious. "Swear on your wand you will always be completely honest with me."

Now that Draco knew he couldn't do.

Honesty for him was going to be a stretch, but he would do it for her.

Complete honest transparency he was NOT ready for.

He couldn't tell her everything all the time. He would be a wreck in a week from it. No, she had seen enough already. He would give her honesty but he could not give her everything.

Draco drew his wand and held it tight in his hand. He looked down at the simple, yet beautiful helper that had gotten him through the last few weeks.

 _You'll hold me to it won't you?_ He thought and felt a distinct warmth echo back in answer.

"Hermione Granger, I swear on my wand that when we are alone I will not lie to you." Said Draco. "May my wand prevent a lie from passing my lips when it is just the two of us alone."

Draco's wand glowed brightly and he felt a tingling in his lips.

"Thank you," said Granger and her face softened and became sweet. "It means more to me than you can understand."

Draco nodded with a small tight smile that was half grimace.

It meant a lot to her. It also meant a lot to Draco, though in a less pleasant way. He didn't want to let anyone in and here she was making him feel like she was already half inside his soul.

"I need...sleep," said Draco, his shoulders falling.

"Okay," said Hermione with a nod.

Draco made his way over to the far side of his massive bed and Hermione made her way over to the side with her pallet.

"Draco?" her voice was hesitant.

"Yes?" he answered and she paused for half a heartbeat before asking:

"Are you okay?"

The words 'I'm fine' would not exit his mouth as much as he willed them to.

He felt a tingle at his lips.

 _Fuck me._

T _hat's what you get for promising no lies and swearing it on your wand._

"I am as good as can be expected given the circumstances," he answered, carefully balancing with truth with his desire to not to open up any further this evening.

He already felt like a raw nerve and he needed to shut down before he broke down.

"Oh...okay," she seemed disappointed with his answer.

"You should just get some sleep Granger, it will do us both good," Draco tried to smile at her and he knew it didn't reach his eyes.

"I've slept already," she answered.

"For an hour..." he said his lips flattening into a thin line. "Oh," he paused remembering. "I brought you food," he handed her the brown package with a roll he and an orange.

Hermione came around to his side of the bed to meet him and took the items from him.

"Thank you, I'm actually famished," she said biting directly into the roll.

"I'm sorry I couldn't bring you something before."

"It's alright," she said through the bun in her mouth.

"No it's not."

"Draco stop beating yourself up over it," she swallowed her bite of food.

 _Fat chance._

"That's not going to happen," he said honestly.

"Well it isn't making anything better and it doesn't make me happy to see you upset."

Draco took a moment to process that.

 _She cares if you're upset._

 _She only cares because it makes her feel bad because she's a good person. She doesn't actually care about you._

"Fine, I'll do my best to not let it show," he answered.

"That's not what I meant Draco."

"Well it's the best you are going to get Granger, I can't change how I feel." _No matter how much I wish I could._

Granger shook her head and almost rolled her eyes.

"What?" asked Draco.

"Nothing," she answered and took another bite of the roll.

"I should have made you swear honesty," he said derisively.

"Do you want me to?" she asked and swallowed the food licking her lips.

He paused, partially because her little pink tongue darting out over the lips he now knew to be so soft and welcoming was distracting him from rational thought, and partially because he was actually considering her question.

"No," he finally answered after a long moment.

"No?" she looked confused and surprised by his answer.

 _This conversation is not going to end anytime soon unless you give her something to satisfy that curious mind. She wants honesty and she's not going to leave you alone and let you sleep till you give a reason._

"I want you to be able to stay strong and protect yourself," said Draco honestly "And if that means you lie to me so be it."

"Draco..."

"Granger please," he looked at her pleading. "Let me be." He was tired and had endured more in the last twenty four hours than should be bearable.

Pain crossed her face.

 _You asked for honesty,_ he thought incredulously.

 _Honesty doesn't mean you have to be an ass about things._

"I hope you sleep well," she said trying to be sweet, though he could tell his last comment had hurt her feelings.

"Not likely but thank you anyways," Draco forced a half smile. "I hope you enjoy your meal and sleep well," he added sincerely.

"Thank you," she said and dug her nails into the orange he had given her pealing back the skin.

Draco turned away from Hermione and those lovely eyes that were looking at him so intently. He stripped off his clothes down to his boxers before grabbing a set of pajama bottoms. He felt Granger's eyes on him like a caress at his back and he glanced back at her over his shoulder. She looked away and popped a slice of orange in her mouth.

Draco caught sight of himself in the mirror off to the side. His ribs and face were still bruised. The myriad of cuts had closed and were scabbed over in hard brown lines.

He was ugly: bruised, battered and scarred.

 _You don't even have your looks to charm her with,_ he thought angrily.

 _Not that she cared about or was affected by those anyways._

 _Well, she was slightly affected._

 _Not now_ , he countered. _Now you're just ugly and object of her pity._

Draco threw his clothes angrily into the laundry basket in the corner and winced at the pain in his side. If she saw the wince she didn't show it and he was thankful for that at least.

He sighed a wave of added fatigue hitting him. He was surprised he was still even able to stand given everything he had been through in the last twenty four hours. With effort he lifted the covers crawling into bed.

He was asleep almost before his head hit the pillow.

* * *

Hermione felt a warm hand nudge her awake. She opened her eyes to see Draco's face above her. The moonlight bleeding in through the window made the chiselled lines of his face even more beautiful. She looked up at him, wishing that he hadn't pulled away, hadn't thought the kiss was one of pity.

 _But it was partially that wasn't it?_ Her mind questioned.

Perhaps it had been a little, but that wasn't really why she had kissed him. She had kissed him for everything that he had done for her and for everything he had been through.

She had kissed him because for a moment she had gotten lost in those beautiful eyes which were now staring down at her intently.

"What is it?" she asked. It was the middle of the night and this was the first time that he had woken her without it being from a nightmare.

"I wanted to apologize," he said sitting back. Hermione sat up so that she was facing him. He shifted giving her room to move. Her eyes went down at the movement and she realised he was shirtless. She resisted the urge to pull the covers up even though she was practically fully clothed. The moonlight played with shadows over his bare torso.

 _Gods he's beautiful._

"What for?" she asked. "You've already apologized enough Draco."

"It will never be enough," he answered and she reached out to him without thinking. Her hand touched the bare skin of his shoulder and she was surprised at how soft the skin was over top of the hard deltoid.

Like satin over steel, she thought remembering a line from an old romance novel she had read back in her tweens. She had thought the description strange at the time. Now it made perfect sense.

"I'm sorry for everything," Draco continued. "But…" he paused. "I am especially sorry for pulling away from that kiss."

"What?" Hermione felt the blood rush to her face and her heartrate jump to attention inside her chest.

"I wanted to kiss you," he reached out and brushed a strand of hair away from her face. "So much," his hand stroked down her neck and rested with his thumb brushing against her earlobe. Hermione's hand dropped from his shoulder and he caught it with his free hand lacing their fingers together.

"Let me fix that mistake," he whispered softly and then he leaned forward slowly giving her plenty of time to pull back. When she didn't he pressed his lips to hers.

It was Hermione's turn to be shocked. Shock gave way to a desire to just let it happen. She wanted Draco. She wanted him in so many ways, body mind and soul.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and moaned opening her mouth to the kiss. His hand dropped from her neck down to her breast and she moaned again this time turning her head away from the kiss.

Her senses fried with the sensation and she moaned.

He tweaked her nipple and she shuddered.

All at once it became too much, it was all too much.

"Stop," she said, but her voice sounded oddly faint, even she could barely hear it herself. Draco couldn't hear her, he made no sign of stopping and suddenly his touch felt cold.

"Stop." she said again only this time there was no sound. Tears formed in her eyes. He lay her back down. She wanted him and she wanted this, but not like this. Not when she had no voice. Not when she couldn't say all the things that needed to be said.

He touched her again and she tried to stop it to no avail. She asked him to stop but he could not hear her. She could not even hear herself.

She screamed.

* * *

Suddenly she was being shook awake by strong hands on her shoulders. She blinked up to see Draco above her once more. This time his torso was bathed in moonlight but less perfect. She could see his flaws, the scars and the bruises.

She yanked herself away from him. Her throat felt tight and sore-like a lump you get before crying had doubled back on itself. It physically hurt to swallow.

"Are you okay?" Draco asked, his voice and expression both laced with concern. "It sounded like you were having a nightmare."

Hermione shook her head and waved him off.

She couldn't be near him right now, not after that dream-not after where her sleeping mind had taken her.

She stood on wobbling legs and went to the washroom she went inside and closed the door behind her with a soft click. She saw Draco standing on the other side as she closed the door and knew he cared, but couldn't bring herself to be with him and open up to him now.

She swallowed, the lump in her throat aching.

She turned on the shower and stepped in fully clothed sinking down against the back wall she willed the ball to go away. Willed tears to come, but nothing happened and somehow that was worse. Like a clogged passage the pain from the pressure was excruciating.

An hour later Hermione came out of the washroom. She used the wand that Draco had given her to dry her clothes. It was a simple wand but it was working well for her. Not a bad match.

When she stepped back into his bedroom Draco was still there waiting for her. He was sitting by the door, back against the wall, fast asleep. His pale blond hair fell across his forehead in soft strands that her hands wished to touch and brush aside.

His wand rested in his open palm.

 _You could take it._

She had seen what that wand was capable of and was smart enough to know that there was something extra about it. Something that had taken her classmates skills and spells to another level.

Draco had always been talented, but the level of detail in his spell form the other night, when he had created the illusion that had saved her, lent credence to her theory that it was not just an ordinary wand.

 _No_ , Hermione answered herself back. _It would be wrong to take it._

She stepped past Draco and went to his dresser pulling out some fresh clothes. Somehow the outfit she was wearing now felt wrong. There were too many memories attached to them and all of them bad. At least in Draco's clothes she could feel comfortable. She slipped them on and then crawled back into her pallet.

She didn't bother to wake Draco, couldn't face the fact that he was both her dream and nightmare. He was booth her captor and savior, in her dreams and here in real life.

The next morning when she woke Hermione found a massive breakfast waiting for her, more decadent and elaborate than anything she had found waiting in the past. With it sat a note that read one simple word.:

 _ **Eat**_

* * *

 **I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter. It was really important for me to write. As I have said before writing about certain things can be very cathartic. When you have been through sexual assault or unwanted attention of that kind it can give you some pretty messed up dreams that turn even people you care about into villains for a moment in time.**

 **I am excited for the next chapter and I hope you guy are too, thank you for reading and I would love to know what you thought of this chapter.**


	23. Chapter 21: The Realization

**Thank you to those who reviewed last chapter especially:** Addfam2008, Two Pumpkin pasty, alluringmango, inkwolf199, Ayr tomfeltonswifey, and guest "Who" **As well as everyone else who has taken the time to review since. You are all appreciated.**

 **This chapter is dedicated to:** addictedtoloveandfiction **you are overdue for a dedication, thank you for being awesome and taking the time to review so often. You Rule and I appreciate you.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. It contains, violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 21: The Realization

A day passed where Draco successfully avoided Hermione which felt like a mini-triumph and yet Depressed Draco at the same time.

She had stepped past him and gone to bed without waking him after her nightmare which told him she didn't want anything to do with him and made him worry that the nightmare was somehow his fault.

The following morning he made her the most extravagant breakfast he could manage and then had left not wanting to disturb her or frankly talk about the previous day. He had tried to write a note, say something that might make it better, but everything he came up with sounded fake or stupid so he kept it simple and just wrote: Eat

He made food for Fred as well in case the boy woke up. He went to the oasis to check on Fred and there appeared to be no change so Draco used magic to make Fred swallow another vial of healing potion and he drank one himself while eating what he had originally intended to give to the redhead.

He watched Fred and thought about what he should say to Hermione.

He had nothing.

There was nothing that Draco felt he could do to make it better so he opted for avoidance hoping that she would just try and…forget about the kiss, even though he knew he never would.

He reminded himself all day that it was just a kiss of Pity and that he should not be thinking about it.

He tried to throw himself into his work of making more potions for Fred, but still it kept coming back into his mind.

After about the eighth time he put his heads in his hands and let out a growl of frustration.

"You shouldn't be thinking about this," he said out loud. "She said she wouldn't do it again."

 _Did she say that because she thought it was what he wanted or because she regretted it?_

Either way Draco hated that she had said it.

Draco looked at tiny mirror he was keeping in his pocket and saw Fred laying there, unmoving.

He found himself checking several times through the afternoon.

If Fred woke up it would give Draco an excuse to talk to Hermione and give some good news.

Draco ate with his family running on auto pilot that night. He answered the questions his aunt Bellatrix kept asking, avoided looking at his mother and father and went back down to the potions lab to work until his eyes were bleary and it was well past midnight.

Hermione was asleep when he came back to the room. It felt a little strange to Draco being so relieved to find a girl in his room asleep.

He walked over to her and looked down at the pallet.

She looked peaceful.

 _Good_ , he thought quietly. He wanted her to rest well.

Draco snuck away to check on Fred.

There didn't seem to be much of a change one way or another from the morning which worried Draco. He cast several more healing spells on the Weasely boy before heading back into his room and falling into a restless sleep.

Draco checked on Fred first thing in the morning the next day. It felt odd for him to hope that a Weasely was okay.

The tall redhead lay motionless on the bed and Draco felt his stomach knot with worry as the hope wavered. He reached out a hand and felt the pulse. It was faster and stronger than yesterday, but Fred's skin was unusually warm.

 _If he gets a fever on top of his other injuries he's going to die,_ He acknowledged to himself.

 _Fuck._

Draco ran a hand through his hair. He really did not know what to do and he had literally no one whom he could turn to.

 _You could turn to Snape,_ part of his mind suggested.

Draco immediately dismissed the idea.

It was one thing for Snape to be looking out for him with regards to Hermione-his mentor seemed to understand that Draco wasn't going to back down from protecting her- and it was another thing for him to go around saving every member of the order who happened to cross his path. Snape was, after all, still aligned with the Dark Lord.

 _Come on Malfoy you are smart enough for this, figure something out on your own_.

Draco took the potion he had left by the bedside and fed it to Fred. Once again he had to use magic in order to make the redhead swallow.

 _This is hopeless,_ he thought rubbing his face with his hands. When he raised his head again he looked at the comatose boy in front of him.

People often say that people in comas can hear those around them, and Draco, remembering that fact, spoke out loud.

"If you're listening Weasely...and I don't know if you are or if you can hear me. I need to you to fight," he paused. "I need you to wake up. Your friends need you…Hermione needs you." He let those words hand in the air for a few moments then turned and left closing the door behind him and locking it.

Fuck this was a mess.

Draco rubbed his eyes.

How long would it be before her friends came again? He needed to figure out a way to contact them.

 _You could give Granger some FLU powder,_ he found himself thinking.

 _And open a fireplace in my house? Someone could be listening in._

Who was he kidding? He knew the chances that someone was monitoring his houses fireplaces was far too high to risk. Besides even if they weren't if the order came storming though an open fireplace it could end horribly.

 _It's a risk yes, but if they come storming though you can just go with them._

 _But then what about Fred?_

Dammit, the redhead was making his life more complicated and he wasn't even conscious to do so. Hermione would never forgive him or herself if Fred was left behind.

 _He needs to be awake to come with you._

 _Well_ , thought Draco, _that gives me my starting point_. He breathed in deep setting his shoulders.

 _I just have to find a way to heal this half of the Weasel twins._ The thought was strange even echoing inside his own mind.

 _Who are you?_ He found himself asking. _A month ago you wouldn't have given two shits if one of the Weasels kicked the bucket._

It was true. He didn't like them. He didn't like the Weasely family with their ratty clothes and red hair and...love. They were everything that his family wasn't and he wished like hell he had something closer to their life and family…maybe not quite so warm and fuzzy or wool-clad, but…less cold.

 _Your mother loves you,_ he reminded himself.

 _Yeah, well how much is she going to love you when all of this is done?_

Draco ground his teeth together in frustration and left his oasis to head for the kitchen.

He stumbled when he saw that his mother was there already by the sink. She was never up this early and based on appearances she hadn't slept much the previous night.

Narcissa looked downright haggard and the dark circles below her eyes attested to the level of exhaustion she was experiencing. When Draco came into the room her head swung his way and her eyes met his with a haunted look.

"Good morning mother," said Draco, his voice a little more terse than he had intended.

She nodded his way.

"You aren't usually up this early," he added and moved to make breakfast.

 _Act as nonchalant as you can so she doesn't suspect anything._

"Neither are you," she said, her voice just a little hoarse.

Worry clouded Draco's mind for a moment. He didn't like seeing his mother like this. The last time he had seen her like this was…he had never seen her like this.

"I'm often up this early," Draco said with a shrug, which Narcissa was to pre-occupied in her own thoughts to notice how stiff and forced the movement was. "You and father are just usually sleeping at that point."

He looked to her and saw her expression was strained.

"What is it?" he asked sensing there was something more.

"The dark Lord will be hosting a dance here this evening," she said, her voice hollow.

"That's awfully short notice to pull together a party," said Draco.

"Yes, well…." Narcissa trailed off and Draco heard the unspoken words: It was the Dark Lords desire that they have a dance which meant they MUST have one worthy of his enjoyment. The guest list would be easy-everyone who he wanted to come would attend or would suffer hideous consequences. And the responsibility of making sure it was a party worthy of his 'Lordship' fell squarely on his mother's shoulders.

To pull things together on such short notice….was unfair. It was clearly a power trip to watch them all scramble to prepare for a dance in such a tight time frame.

Draco knew his mother loved parties and she loved making them sensational. It would stress her to fall short as a hostess even without the added pressure of pleasing Voldemort. Draco wondered if that was why she looked to haggard or if it had anything to do with what she believed he had done.

Her body language and posturing told him she was not happy with him. She would barely look at him and had her shoulders turned away in a very closed-off manner.

"He wants you to bring the girl. Have her dressed up appropriately for the dance," added Narcissa.

Draco's stomach dropped.

He had hoped he could keep Hermione hidden away. He didn't want her to be the entertainment again. It seemed he had no choice. At least this time though, she _knew_ he was trying to protect her and he could warn her so she could mentally prepare for it.

There were some benefits to her knowing the truth.

"Alright," Draco answered.

"Alright?" Narcissa asked her head whipping towards him.

"What do you want me to say mother?" he asked feeling a little desperate. She hadn't said a word to him last night over dinner and the silence had killed him a little.

Narcissa shook her head and raised a hand to the hollow of her throat holding herself for a moment eyes closed. When her eyes opened they were hard and impassive.

"Don't be late," she ordered and walked out of the room.

Draco stood in the kitchen motionless.

So there was a party tonight, a dance.

A strange sensation settled over Draco as he realized her wanted to dance with Hermione.

He thought back to how she had looked for the Yule ball. He remembered the gorgeous dress she had worn, all long and flowing and blue and beautiful. Viktor Krum had been a lucky bastard to have her as his date.

If memory served Draco correctly Granger had been upset at the end of the night. He distinctly remembered passing her in the hallway, as his date was kissing his ear on the way back to the Slyertherin common room. Even tear-stained her face had been beautiful.

 _And yet she ended up with the Weasel git anyways…_

 _Don't think about that now Draco you've got another one of the Weasely's to deal with unconscious in your wardrobe._

Draco let out a sigh of frustration and looked to the window.

He wanted to dance with her, and he would never get the chance.

The sun was just rising and he quickly whipped together quick breakfast for both himself and Granger before going back up to his room.

He needed to do something extra for her yesterday, after everything that had happened and breakfast-it seemed- was becoming his method of communicating his need for atonement.

She was still sleeping when he got back upstairs.

Draco set down the breakfasts and cast a quick spell to keep hers warm. For a moment Draco debated waiting for her so they could eat together and immediately tossed aside the thought. He didn't want to make things awkward for her.

Just because he wanted to eat with her and talk with her didn't mean she would feel the same and he hated the idea of forcing her to spend time with him.

He didn't want attention if all it was, was obligation.

Draco went over to his shelf, piece of toast in hand, and pulled out a giant tome called "The Art of Potions for Health, Healing and Longevity". It was old and dusty and he hadn't read it in several years-even back when he had tried to make it through the book it had been more of a cursory reading than actual study. This time he began reading at the introduction. About two hours later the sounds of Granger squeaking as she stretched away pulled his eyes away from the book.

She arched back on her pallet, arms stretched out far above her head, hands in tiny fists. The motion pushed her chest up and his eyes couldn't help but lock on to the way the shirt pulled tight against her curves. His body hardened and he felt a heat creep into his cheeks. He tied to will down the response. His efforts proved fruitless. She sat up after the stretch and rubbed her eyes cutely letting out a tiny kitten-like yawn.

She blinked at him seeming surprised to see him there.

"What are you doing in the room?" she asked.

"It is my room," Draco answered giving her a look.

"Yes, but...you avoid it," she said pointedly.

She wasn't wrong.

"Well...I'm tired, and...things are different now."

"Different how?" she asked padding over to him. She wasn't wearing her bra and he could see the curve of her breast outlined so beautifully in his shirt. He wanted to just reach out and hold them, cup them, kiss them.

He lost complete track of what she had asked.

"What?" he asked bringing his eyes back up to her face. Granger covered her chest with her hands, clearly having seen where his eyes had lingered.

"You know for someone who says they don't want me you certainly know how to make me feel like you do."

"I do have a way of making women feel wanted," said Draco his voice going smooth as velvet. He watched Granger blush and damn if it wasn't the cutest things he had seen in ages.

"I am a guy Granger," he said changing tracks. "You're a beautiful woman. Just because I-" he choked on the words 'don't want to sleep with you' They wouldn't budge out of his mouth.

 _Fucking Promise of honesty_ , Draco growled mentally.

Granger gave him a look.

"Just because you what?" she looked genuinely puzzled at his sentence ending where it did.

 _Oh thank Merlin she hasn't got her brain turned on to realize it's the promise preventing me from telling her that I don't want to sleep with her._

Draco wracked his brain for a truth he could say that wouldn't give away his attraction.

"You are a beautiful woman," he began again. "But physical beauty isn't everything," he continued. "Some people care more about other things."

 _Like how beautiful your heart is, or how fascinating that mind of yours is._ He thought to himself refusing to say those things aloud.

"Like blood….people like you care about breeding" she frowned. "Right...I almost forgot my 'dirty blood' what with you trying to save my life and all" her frown turned to anger. "I thought you had...never mind. It was stupid of me to think that you could look past that."

Draco wanted to open his mouth to tell her that she was wrong...and couldn't.

She was wrong, absolutely and entirely wrong. He didn't care about her being a...about her not being a pure blooded witch. Not anymore.

But she didn't need to know that. He needed her safe and if she was afraid of him, of him wanting her then she wouldn't trust him. Besides, they could never be. He knew that. He knew that she thought of him as less anyways, so why bother correcting her just because she thought he thought the same?

 _Because it hurts her to know people think of her that way._

 _I don't want to hurt her…I never want to hurt her._

She took his silence for agreement.

"I need to shower," she said with venom. "At least I can get the dirt of my skin."

Draco sat watching her go. He wanted to tell her she was wrong so badly. He hated to see her in pain, to see her thinking for even one second that she wasn't incredible and worthy.

He slammed the book shut.

 _You shouldn't be here._

The truth was he had missed her and hadn't wanted to stay away another day.

 _Give her the space she needs to stay strong._

 _She will need to be strong for tonight._

He regretted not telling her about the upcoming dance before, but he had been distracted by…well everything about her.

"Fuck," he muttered and ran a hand through his hair.

How would the dark Lord want her presented? His mother had said the Dark Lord wanted Hermione 'Dressed up appropriately'

Draco wanted to put Hermione is something dull and plain that covered her from neck to ankle to keep her safe. He also knew that no matter what she wore she was too beautiful to fade into the background…and that hair of hers…that beautiful hair stood out like a siren's mane. It was going to be a task and half to find something appropriate. He would much rather have Hermione come with him and tell him what she wanted-unfortunately that wasn't an option.

Draco sighed and apparated out of the mansion.

* * *

The streets were crowded and people bustled about as if nothing were the matter, and yet there was a tension in the air like that energy which builds up right before a thunderstorm. People who knew him and knew he was supposed to be in school gave strange looks, but not shop keeper was going to turn down or question the deep pockets of a Malfoy.

It had been ages since he had gone shopping for a girl. He had bought jewelry and sweets for past girlfriends but never a dress.

He passed by several store fronts until one finally had dress that caught his eye. He recognized it as a shop his mother often frequented. He went inside and began to browse around. A busty middle aged woman began preening around him and he graciously took her help letting her show him several dresses on a live model before he stopped her.

The last dress the woman had put on to show off was floor length. The neck was cut high catching around the throat, but the back…when the model turned the back was open. She had a very sexy back, but it was the thought of Hermione in that dress, her back exposed, that had Draco's skin prickling to attention. He could stand at her back all night and run his fingers down her spine…

 _No, you can't do that._

 _You are not allowed to touch her for your own gratification. If you touch her it must be for show otherwise you are just as bad as the rest of them._

Still, he needed a dress and he needed it to be sexy enough to have her look presentable and like his trophy without it being horrible for Granger to wear. This dress was a good, and somewhat practical solution.

"I'll take it," he said, to which the lady smiled.

"What colour would you like?"

"Dark Burgundy," he answered without even thinking. He knew it would match her skin.

"An excellent choice, from a man of taste," she said with a nod.

Draco thought of Hermione and how she would feel in the dress. No matter what he did she would feel self-conscious. It wasn't a wisp of fabric or a t-shirt masquerading as a dress, it was the best he could do.

"A pair of gloves as well," he said. If she wanted to wear her scar for all to see she could, he wouldn't stop her, but if she wanted to hide it he would at least make sure she had that option.

"And the colour for those?" she asked.

"White," he answered..." Then paused...there was a good chance they would get dirty with blood. His stomach soured. "Black," he corrected. "Satin black."

The woman nodded and as if sensing his change of mood packed up the dress and gloves as well as a simple black pair of heels without saying another word.

Draco paid and then apparated home.

Hermione was still in the bathroom when he got back so he left the box with the clothes on her pallet and left a note:

 **The Dark Lord Requests your presence this evening at the dance he is throwing.**

 **He ordered you be dressed up for the festivities.**

Draco wanted to tell her that he had picked these items out for her specifically-that wasn't wise thought. He couldn't risk it-in case someone saw the note and realized or guessed at his feelings for her.

Draco paused, a thought occurring to him. He cast a spell writing something extra with his wand. The second the spell was finished the additional writing vanished leaving the paper with only the first two lines he had written.

 _That should keep the truth from prying eyes._

Draco turned and picked up the tome on potions he had been reading earlier in the morning and took it down to his potions lab where he sat reading for several hours.

* * *

Granger stripped off Draco's clothes flinging them away from herself and onto the floor.

How stupid could she be? She had thought that under everything Draco caring for her meant that he actually cared for her...that he might like her.

 _Why on earth would you want Draco Malfoy to like you?_ her mind demanded.

 _Because_ , she answered back. She knew the answer. It was simple really, because he was so much more than she had ever believed. Because he cared so much and was willing to risk it all for her. What girl didn't want a guy who was doing his best to do what was right, who cared for his mother, who would sacrifice for someone he cared about, who would overcome a horrible abusive upbringing of pain and indoctrination of bigotry.

He hadn't overcome that last part though. He still saw her as less.

And yet...when she had been in his mind she had seen how much he cared for her, how torn up he had been about hurting her. How all he wanted to do was protect her. She had also seen and felt his desire.

 _That was just lust_ , she shook her head. _Nothing more._

 _Like the lust you saw this morning right before he told you…_

He had said he could care for her and lust after her without actually liking her or truly wanting to be with her. She believed him and hated herself for wishing it wasn't so.

She stepped in the water under the spray and rubbed at her chest. Tears formed in the corners of her eyes. She wiped at them, refusing to let them fall.

He had called her beautiful, but he thought she was ugly inside.

He had called her Brilliant, but he thought she was dirty.

A choked sob escaped her lips she put the back of her hand to her mouth and pressed down firmly. She couldn't let him think she was crying over him.

She wouldn't cry over Draco Malfoy.

The tightness in her chest grew with every passing second until finally she had no choice.

She turned to the wall and covered her face and cried.

When Hermione came out of the shower she noticed a note waiting for her.

 **The Dark Lord Requests your presence this evening at the dance he is throwing.**

 **He ordered you be dressed up for the festivities.**

The words were so cold and so harsh. She hated it. She didn't even want to look in the box to see what was there. Probably some slutty dress to be paraded round in. She tossed aside the note and shoved the box onto the floor burying her face in the covers and shutting out the world.

Hunger drove her to get up out of bed and eat. The food, thanks to Draco's spell, was still warm and waiting for her. It made her angry that it still tasted good. That he could be so nice and still be such an ass about some things.

When she had finished eating she picked up a book off the shelf and through herself into reading, it was dry and scientific but reading she could pretend to somewhere else and just...escape.

* * *

It was lunch time when Narcissa came down to the potions room to see her son.

She looked much better than she had this morning. Her elegant facade was in place. However as Draco looked up at his mother he saw what the world could not. Her perfect hair had several strands out of place. It was hardly something noticeable. The French twist was still impeccably executed, but it stood out to Draco. Her makeup was meticulously applied, but the lines by her eyes and the corners of her mouth were more pronounced. There was a stray piece of lint on the left shoulder of her perfect black blouse and despite the amount of concealer that had been so expertly applied, there was still a shadow faintly visible beneath her eyes.

Draco wanted to comfort her. He wanted to confide in her, but for the first time in Draco's life he couldn't trust his mother. Her views on Hermione and the differences between them stood in the way of what had always been a strong bond between mother and son.

Narcissa walked around the room looking at several items before running a finger across the shelf and looking at her fingertip in disgust.

"This room needs to be cleaned," she said and brushed her hands off.

"I'll attend to that later," he answered flatly.

"We need a new elf," she said with a sigh. "I really wish Dobby hadn't gone and-"

"Gotten himself killed by our aunt?"

Narcissa paused mid-stride.

"CCo-erced Potter into tricking your father to set him free."

"That elf was ill used," said Draco. The lens which he was now looking though at his world told him that he had been horrible to follow his father's footsteps regarding the elf. He regretted ever swatting at the creature. "You can't blame him for wanting freedom."

 _I want freedom, for myself and for Granger_ , Draco thought.

"House Elves don't know what to do with freedom," said Narcissa. "Just look at what happened with that little female Elf at your school. Gave her freedom and she does what with it? Drinks herself into a stupor."

"I don't want to have this conversation mother," said Draco, knowing that it would not go anywhere good and not wanting to fight with his mother any more than absolutely necessary to maintain the illusion of his hate for Granger. Above everything else she was his mother and he loved her.

"Fine," Narcissa said tightly and turned to him. "It wasn't why I came down here anyways."

"Why did you come down here mother?" Draco asked tiredly rubbing at his eyes.

"Draco, you should be resting. You still aren't well," he heard the concern in her voice and a part of him was pleased to know she still cared despite everything. It gave him some solace.

"I'm fine," he answered. "Thank you for your concern but I'm a big-boy now and I can handle myself."

"Like you handled yourself the other night?"

Draco's eyes snapped to his mother's face knowing full well she was talking about the night that she believed Draco had raped Hermione.

"I didn't raise you to be that Draco."

"No, but you did raise me to hate people like her."

"Not to sleep with them though."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Draco's voice rose along with his blood pressure. "Are you mad because I raped her or because I stuck my prick in a Mudblood?"

"Draco Malfoy you watch your tongue!"

"No," he said. "You tell me what the hell you meant!" Blood was rushing in his ears.

"I meant forcing a woman against her will Draco," she scoffed. "Gods, what do you think of me that I would approve of that? Regardless of her blood it isn't right!"

A calming relief flowed over Draco as he realized his mother was upset over the right thing: Not that he had dirtied himself sleeping with Granger but that she thought he had forced her.

 _You still can't tell her that she's wrong. The last time you did that look how it turned out._

"What I do with Hermione Granger is not your business."

"But it is. You're my son," she came over to him and touched his face. "I want what is best for you. I want you to become a good man Draco...a better man than..."

"Than my father?" scoffed Draco pulling away from her touch.

"A better man than you were that night."

"Times of peace are for good men," said Draco, every moment that she was there only increased Draco's desire to confide the truth to his mother. "I would like you to leave. I am working and wish to be left alone."

"Very well," said Narcissa swallowing. If Draco wasn't mistaken he could see tears in his mother's eyes and Narcissa was not the kind of woman to cry.

 _She really does care. She really does love you._

 _And that's why you can't just run away and abandon her to Voldemort's wrath._

He watched her walk away and then she stopped.

"You are right Draco," said Narcissa standing at the bottom of the stairs across the room from him. "Times of peace are for good men, but times of war are for great ones."

Draco's mother's final words stayed with him and try as he might he couldn't shake them away.

He was not a great man.

He wasn't even a good man.

When he tried to do good things he fucked everything up so much worse.

Draco rested his head in his hands fisting his fingers in his own hair.

No he was not good... Hermione was good. She was more than good. She was incredible and strong and passionate and forgiving and far to caring for her own health and he wanted so much to save her because she was so perfect he couldn't help but love her.

Love her.

Time paused.

"No..." Draco breathed. "No, no, no, no, no." He threw the book across the room.

He couldn't.

Draco Malfoy wasn't the kind to fall in love. He liked beautiful women and they liked him, but that wasn't love. It had never been love.

Someday his family would make him a match with a beautiful pureblood woman and they would have an old fashioned, almost royal, Malfoy marriage. There didn't need to be love only mutual understanding. That was his fate if he could just make it through all of this and on to the other side. He would be successful and powerful and have a proper wife, a successful life and good standing in society...

But he wouldn't have her...He wouldn't have Hermione.

That thought cut him open. He would throw away all of those things, his fortune, everything for her. To be with her.

But he **couldn't** have her...

And somehow the elusiveness and impossibility of ever having her didn't change anything.

Tension rotted in his gut as he realized he was trapped by his own feelings.

Suddenly the thought of being married to someone he didn't love felt like a hellish fate.

How could he be with someone who he was indifferent too when he knew what it was life to feel like this: To love.

"Fuck," Draco moaned and burred his face in the crook of his elbow.

There was no escaping it: no escaping the truth:

He was in Love with the passionate, beautiful, strong, curly haired woman up in his room.

Draco Malfoy, stupid and fucked up and reckless at utterly hopeless as it was... was completely, helplessly, deeply, in love with Hermione Granger.

* * *

 **AND THERE YOU HAVE IT FOLKS.**

 **We have made it to the point where Draco has not only fallen in love with Hermione he has also finally realized that he is in love with Her. It took a while to get here but I wanted to make this romance as realistic as possible keeping Draco as close to cannon (before the what-if started) as possible. Please drop a review and give some love.**


	24. Chapter 22: The Dress

**Thank you to** : WitchyXander728, tomfeltonswifey, Ayr, addictedtoloveandfiction, LillsBills, alluringmango, Starearth, mmiller0000, BeYourOwnLivingHistory, inkwolf199, Looneyluvgood55, Rouch, Addfam2008, Rclaw00, .Me, Wolfling72, Kotodashi Kyoshi, NadzKers12, Aid4, and the guests "Jess", "Who" **and all other guest reviews. It was great to see such a mix of people in the reviews from those who have been around since the start (you know "** Who **") and those who just commented for the first time as well as all those in between and since. You all rock and I appreciate you.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. It contains, violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. Reader Digression is advised.**

* * *

Chapter 22: The Dress

Noon came and passed and Hermione had to stop reading from the strain on her eyes of focus. She set aside the book frustrated and rubbed at her eyes with the palms of her hands.

 _You can't put it off much longer,_ she told herself looking over at the box and note.

She didn't want Draco to be mad at her, which was strange to admit inside her own mind since she was still actively mad about the note he had left.

It was so formal and so...cold and after everything…after seeing in his mind, the coldness was grating.

 _He's still just trying to protect you..._ she thought. She knew that if he came back mad it would be because he was worried she would get hurt for them being late.

Hermione sighed and picked up the box and opened it pushing away the white tissue paper to reveal a dark burgundy dress.

Picking it up out of the box she held it up to herself and looked in the mirror. The shade matched her completion perfectly making her skin look more fresh: Healthier, which was a little feat of magic in and of itself given what she had been through the last few weeks.

Hermione stripped down to her bra and underwear feeling like they were far too simple for what she was about to put on.

 _Oh well,_ she thought. _It's not like you have any other options_.

She had been washing and re-using the same clothing since becoming a captive which was fairly easy considering all that she had to do here to clean her clothes was pop them in the laundry hamper in the bathroom and a few hours later they would pop back out clean and folded. When she wore Draco's clothes, she sometimes didn't bother to put on anything underneath. Since his clothes felt big on her anyways she didn't really worry about it.

Hermione slipped on the dress and looked in the mirror. It was a little long and slightly loose in a few sections.

"There's nothing you can do about that," Hermione said to her reflection feeling somewhat disappointed that she didn't look nicer, but grateful at the same time. She didn't want to draw too much attention to herself after all.

Hermione slipped her bra-straps over her shoulders and tucked them into the cups. It wasn't comfortable but at least she didn't have straps showing. Then she reached around to do up the back and froze.

There was no back.

She turned and looked in the mirror. The open back went to the base of her spine, barely covering the top of her ass.

"Oh no," she said her eyebrows knitting together. She had been happy that the dress was long and that it covered her chest, but now looking at the back she was suddenly nervous again.

There was so much skin showing and…

She looked ridiculous.

Anger and despair flowed through her.

She wanted to cry but refused to let it out. She had cried more than enough for one day and she wasn't going to let herself become a watering pot over something as stupid as a dress.

 _I just wanted to look nice._

Hermione balked at her own thought. Why on earth would she want to look nice at a ball for Deatheaters?

 _For Draco._

 _No_ , she stopped herself angrily. _You are not going to try or want to impress him. You are stronger than that._

It would be different if he…if he saw her as his equal, then she could justify wanting anything from him, but he didn't and so she couldn't let herself think that way or she would just be another pathetic girl. She would not be the victim here. She wasn't going to let herself stoop that low.

Hermione squared her shoulders. This would have to do.

She turned as she heard the doorknob twist.

Draco came into the room closing the door quietly behind him. His posture was unusually stiff. He caught sight of her and froze and his features hardened into an impassive mask.

"You look nice," he said flatly and Hermione doubted her meant it and then remembered that he couldn't lie to her while they were alone.

 _At least now you can trust everything he says,_ she thought to herself.

It was somehow very comforting in that moment to know that he HAD to tell her the truth.

"Yes...well..." she smoothed out the front. "It doesn't quite fit. You made a good guess at the size though, but I suppose I shouldn't be surprised with all the experience you have with females and their sizes." she said with a cool shrug.

"Granger," his voice had a mild edge to it and then he let out a snort and his shoulders went back with a cocky flare. "I bought it from one of the top designers in Diagon Alley."

Draco took out his wand, he crossed past her briskly and pulled a small white card from the box. He turned to face her and paused hesitating before speaking.

"You might want to take..." he paused and Hermione watched his lips thin as he pressed them together before continuing "You should take off the bra," he finished without meeting her eyes.

"Oh..." Hermione blushed, feeling slightly like she had been caught making a faux-pa. She knew she couldn't wear a bra with a backless dress. She wanted the extra layer, it felt like a layer of protection.

 _Act like it's not a big deal_ , she ordered herself, not wanting him to see how nervous it made her.

Hermione reached behind her back and unhooked her bra and slipped it off without removing the dress. She tossed the bra carelessly back on her pallet.

When her eyes met Draco's it was like a crack of lightning that shot through her and to her very toes. There was something about the look in his eyes that rocked her to her foundation.

That was not a look of someone who was merely looking out for her best interest.

That look said so much more, that look said 'desire'

And then the look was gone, replaced with that cool distant look which she was beginning to recognize as a piece of the mask he wore to conceal his feelings.

Hermione would have given almost anything in that moment to get back inside his head and see just what he was thinking.

 _You don't want to see what he's thinking_ , she argued.

 _Yes, I do._

Draco cleared his throat and looked down at the card.

"Dresses like these from seamstresses on or near Diagon ally are designed to always fit. They have magic woven in them, but it's a one-time thing. Once it alters it keeps that shape permanently," said Draco. "Though I've often thought that there is likely a way around that, but employing it would put too many talented dressmakers out of business."

Draco uttered the incantation written there giving his wand a subtle flick.

Hermione let out a small gasp as the dress came to life and altered to fit her measurements flawlessly. She felt the Dress hug and cling to her every curve like the caress of someone who knew her intimately. Her breath trembled out. When she glanced in the mirror this time she looked at herself and saw a stunning woman looking back.

She glanced at Draco in the mirror, but his eyes were trained on her and not paying attention to the fact that she was looking at him instead of her own reflection.

The look in his eyes was something more than appreciation. There was hunger in his eyes, raw and hot and that pulled at her because there was also something else in his eyes, more than just a carnal look…something more…intimate.

She felt her body warm with awareness of him.

She turned to face him and his eyes went cool.

 _Why is he hiding it?_ She wondered.

 _Because he doesn't actually want you and he doesn't want to lead you on._

 _He's worried you'll try to kiss him again, which he clearly doesn't want._

There had been something else to that look though. Goosebumps rose up along her arms and she shivered and ran her hands up and down them then looked down at the scar on her arm.

The word 'Mudblood' stood out horrifically, preventing her from looking as beautiful as the dress would otherwise make her. She covered what she could of the scar with her hand and tuned back to the mirror.

Draco walked past her again and she felt tuned in to him with every fiber of her being, it was like her skin was crying out for him to come closer.

She watched as he reached down into the box that had contained the dress and pulled out a second set of tissue paper, he came back to stand next to her, his posture still stiff. He handed the item to her without finesse.

She took the tissue paper from him and for a brief moment their fingers touched.

Draco froze and so did Hermione.

Her eyes bypassed his and went straight to his lips again and she felt the overwhelming desire to kiss him again.

 _You promised him you wouldn't_

 _You shouldn't even want to in the first place, you stupid, stupid girl._

"What's this?" she asked clearing her throat and effectively breaking the moment.

Draco pulled away from her as if burned.

"Open it and see," he practically snapped turning away from her.

 _Ass-hat_ , she mentally snapped back.

Hermione pulled back the tissue paper and saw two long satin black gloves laying folded neatly on top of one another. She looked up at him hating her last thought. Even with him being so cold and so distant the fact that he cared was evidenced so clearly in the fact that he had bought gloves to go with the dress. Gloves that were long enough to cover her scar.

 _It's just because he's ashamed of you and of your blood_ , she countered and she felt her stomach turn.

"You don't have to wear them if you don't want to," he said tightly. "But I wanted you to have the option if you needed it."

Hermione almost softened.

 _Okay, so maybe he did it just to be nice,_ she thought. _It doesn't change the fact that he still considers you less._

"Thank you," she managed to force the words out without too much emotion making their way into her tone.

Despite everything else, the sweetness of the gesture, the fact that he had thought of her, and what she might want, had a lump rising in her throat.

"You're welcome," he answered in a perfunctory tone and turned away to his wardrobe.

Hermione watched as He reached inside and pulled out a suit. Hermione turned away and she heard the rustling of fabric. She looked back on a second later to see Draco fully dressed and straightening his Slytherin tie. He looked at her and then took the tie off and went to wardrobe. He pulled out a simple black tie and waved his wand. It changed colours to match her dress, the black becoming burgundy.

She looked at him quizzically wondering why he bothered making the change.

"No one else is allowed to know that you and I are in this together," Draco said firmly. "But...when you look at this and look at me," he touched the tie "You can know that we are in this together and that anything I do..." he swallowed and she could see him struggle with words "I'll do everything and anything I can to get you through tonight with as little damage as possible," he said his voice hard and precise.

"I know," Hermione answered and placed a hand over the tie on his chest. He was wearing her colour to let her know that he was on her side "Thank you Draco."

"Please don't thank me," he said pulled back from her touch stiffly.

She could see the struggle on his face. She knew he was trying to keep it together. He clearly didn't want to go down to the dance and to be put back in a position where he would have to hurt her again.

She didn't want to have him hurt her again.

"What would you have me say instead?" she asked, not knowing what else to say.

"I don't know," he answered honestly.

Silence hung between them.

Their came knock at the door, breaking that silence and Draco stepped even further back from Hermione. She felt the distance immensely.

"Who is it?" he called.

"Your father," came Lucius voice.

Hermione watched Draco's whole body tighten even father, and his demeanor shifted into one of cool calculated control. He went to the door and opened it.

"What do you want?" he almost demanded.

"You are expected downstairs," Lucius said and straightened lifting his chin at his son. "The guests are arriving."

"Of course," said Draco.

"Pretty thing," said Lucius looking at Draco. "Hardly looks the part of a prisoner at all."

Lucius turned and walked away and Draco turned back to Hermione closing the door.

"He's right you know," she said. "I don't look like your prisoner."

"The Dark Lord asked for you to be dressed this way."

"Yes, but he also asked for that because he wants to make a show of me," said Granger. "If your goal is to please him and keep up appearances I can't go like this," she gestured to herself. "I look too much like a guest."

"You look beautiful," said Draco and Hermione could tell by the expression that followed his statement that he hadn't meant to let the words out.

"Thank you," she said with a small smile. "You look pretty dapper yourself."

Draco turned his face away from her and she saw a line twitch in his jaw.

"Yes, well. I am used to dressing up," he answered her without looking back. "Unfortunately my face isn't what it used to be," he said glancing at the mirror.

"Draco..."

"What?" he turned back to her.

 _You're still incredibly handsome._ The words echoed in her mind but she could not bring herself to say them aloud.

Hermione fumbled for something else to say in place of the compliment.

"Chains," she blurted.

"What?" he asked.

"You should have me in chains," she said more firmly.

"I'm not putting you in chains," Draco protested harshly.

"You should," she said and conviction took hold of her tone. "If you won't do it I will," she said and began walking over to her pallet to grab the wand that was hidden there.

"Wait," Draco grabbed hold of her arm and she looked up at him. His eyes were glittering and bore into her.

She waited as he asked her too just looking up at him.

He seemed to struggle for a moment and then swallowed.

"I'll do it."

* * *

Hermione was looking up at him with all the trust in the world. He had never seen someone be so open.

 _You will NEVER deserve her_ , he told himself harshly, _never._

She gave a small smile telling him everything was okay.

Her smile soothed his soul and he did everything he could not to let it show. He couldn't let anything show tonight. He felt exposed in a way that he hadn't felt before. Like the world could see, would see, his feelings for her written all over him. He needed to keep a clamp tightly on those feelings for her sake. He couldn't let it show, couldn't let anyone know.

 _You can never tell her you love her…_

The realization that he could never say the words out loud somehow made everything seem worse.

A swamping feeling of powerless deprecation shot through his veins.

Draco took in a shuddering breath and went to his jewelry box.

On the top level were his cuff links and various family rings. He plucked several of the more simple gold bands from their places and lifted them out along with a gold chain.

With a flick of his wand the pieces came together growing and transforming mid-air.

He brought the collar, cuffs and chain over to Hermione and she stood perfectly still as the golden piece wrapped itself around her neck in the form of a thick collar.

He saw the shudder pass through her as it formed to her skin.

Draco continued the spell and a chain extended out from the front and split part of the way down attaching itself in two cuffs to her wrists. The lead continued out into a leash which Draco held in his hands.

A strange kind of fear and lust mixed with one another in Draco's veins.

She looked like a fantasy come to life: Something from the darker side of his mind. A beautiful woman dressed to the nines and on a golden leash following him wherever he went. The fact that it was Hermione only made the fantasy aspect more intense.

 _You shouldn't go there,_ he warned himself.

It felt wrong.

If it was something she wanted...something she had asked for it would be the sexiest thing in the world. Because it was something she was doing out of necessity it felt wrong to Draco how much he enjoyed seeing her this way and guilt rolled through him.

 _You are dark and broken, she is the light…_

"Draco it's okay," said Hermione seeming to sense his struggle. "It's going to be okay."

"You can't know that," he said. The idea of hurting her...now that he knew...now that he loved her...even the idea of it was ripping him apart.

He would rather cut of a limb than hurt her again.

Unfortunately self-mutilation wouldn't do her any good so he couldn't make that exchange.

 _There is a chance you'll have to torture her again for everyone to see…_

"Draco," she reached out to him the chains clinking gently, he sidestepped her.

"I don't want to hurt you," he admitted out loud.

Suddenly she was hugging him. Holding him as best as the restraints would allow. Draco froze.

 _Don't_ , he warned himself, _don't do it…_

He wanted to curl into her bury his face in her neck and hold her forever.

"Draco," came Narcissa's voice effectively breaking the moment, "You're late. Come down."

"Yes mother," Draco answered and pulled away from Hermione, away from the comfort of her arms and the calming scent of her skin.

He could see in her eyes that she was hurt by his coldness and the fact that he hadn't returned the embrace.

 _Good, that's a good thing,_ he told himself.

So why didn't it feel like it was?

He gave a waved of his wand and a glamour appeared, pulling her hair perfectly into place and decorating her face with subtle makeup.

"Are you ready?" he asked knowing it was a stupid question.

"As ready as I'll ever be," she answered subdued.

"Alright."

Draco led her down the stairs and into the gala bellow.

 _Leading the lioness into the den of snakes._

Music was already playing and people were socializing with glasses of champagne and wine in every hand. Draco grabbed a flute from one of the passing trays and downed it putting the glass back before it had moved more than a few inches. He couldn't afford to get drunk, but a little liquid courage wouldn't hurt.

There were looks from the first second Draco and Hermione came into view. Some were sneers, some were lecherous glances and some...fewer than Draco would have liked, were looks of discomfort at seeing Hermione paraded about like a prized pet in collar and leash.

Draco leaned in close and whispered in her ear.

"Don't say anything," he kissed her neck to make a show of it and she pulled away from the touch.

"Feisty little one you got there isn't she?" Draco recognized the man speaking as one he had obliviated in the Forbidden forest.

Clearly the spell had worked because there was not one iota of recognition in the man's eyes.

"That she is," said Draco yanking on the chain. Hermione, in her heels, stumbled forward. He caught her by the elbow and steadied her.

"I like it," the man reached out to touch Hermione and Draco pulled her back flush against him his hand on her bare back.

 _Fuck, her skin is so soft._

"Ah, ah, ah," he said to the deatheater. "Look but don't touch," he wrapped his hand over the collar on Hermione's throat menacingly and leaned in. "This one is mine."

"No offense meant," the Deatheater gave Draco a respectful nod and raised his hands backing away with a smile on his face.

"Pig," said Hermione.

"Quiet Granger," he said in her ear and pulled her along. For an hour they mingled without issue. Then the hors d'oeuvres went around and Draco saw Hermione salivate and heard a small grumble from her stomach.

"Hungry?" he asked so only she could hear.

She gave a faint nod.

Draco took one of the mini quiches from a nearby tray and held it up in front of Hermione's mouth.

She gave him a look letting him know she was not comfortable being hand fed by him in front of all these people.

Draco gave her a look telling her to just get over it and eat.

"Got her eating from the palm of your hand," said Goyle coming up and slapping Draco on the back with a big meaty hand. "No surprise there. Just like so many of the others."

"Hello Goyle," Draco managed. "Glad to see you could make it."

"Of course mate," said Goyle with a shrug. "Never was much of a fan of this kind of a thing, 'cept of course for the fact that no one seems to care if you drink underage."

"Oh the benefits of the Deatheater's life," said Draco. His 'friend ' did not catch the sarcasm, but Hermione did, and she gave him a warning look. Draco rolled his eyes at her telling her with his expression to mind her own business and that he knew what he was doing.

"So, did you have to even work at it to get her to just follow you like a puppy or was she secretly already crushing on you?" Goyle grabbed several bacon wrapped scallops from a passing floating tray and popped two in his mouth.

"I tortured her for hours," said Draco with no emotion.

Goyle choked and looked at him wide eyed.

"You're serious?" he said swallowing the food. "That's dark."

"These are dark times," said Draco. "Besides, what does it matter," Draco shrugged "she's only a Mudblood." He felt Hermione stiffen at the word and he ran his free hand down her back in what was supposed to be a reassuring way. She pulled away from him and Draco yanked the chain pulling her back, which was a good thing because he caught several people watching them at just that moment and Grangers angry expression was very real, and very convincing.

"Yeah..." Goyle popped the scallop in his mouth. "I heard about Crabbe," Goyle said more quietly.

"Uh-huh," said Draco.

"Were you there when...when he did it?"

"Yes," said Draco. "I was."

"What happened?" Goyle asked and Draco realized that with both Vincent and his father had been killed at the same time. Only Grayback and the Malfoy family would know the reason. Draco was mildly surprised that Grayback hadn't been blabbing his big mouth about it, but then the werewolf probably didn't care enough to unless people asked.

"They got on his bad side," said Draco.

"We didn't even get a funeral for him," said Goyle. "Don't you think that's...wrong somehow?"

"I really don't want to talk about it," said Draco.

"Right," said Goyle. "Sorry."

"Its fine," Draco looked at Goyle and felt a modicum of sympathy. "I know he was your friend too," Draco added.

"Yeah," said Goyle shifting uncomfortably. "I'm...gunna go mingle."

"Alright, I'll see you around," said Draco, not knowing what else to say.

"Right mate," Goyle turned and grabbed several shrimp cakes from a passing tray as he went.

"Goyle," Draco called after his classmate.

"Yeah?" Goyle turned back.

"Don't get dead okay?" There was tightness in his throat.

"Not me man," Goyle smiled. "Not me."

When Goyle was out of earshot Draco turned to Hermione.

"I want to get out of here as soon as it is appropriate for us to leave do you understand?" his voice was tight and he felt like he was going to vomit. Images of Crabbe being pulled to his death link by link while Voldemort sat happily waiting were cascading through his head.

She nodded her eyes searching his face.

"Good," said Draco and he straightened. He needed to get out of the room. Everything felt too close like the people around him were taking up all the oxygen leaving him with nothing.

"Draco!" Voldemort's voice cut across the crowd and the guests fell silent. Draco froze looking into Hermione's eyes.

 _I love you_ , he thought mentally at her and willed her to know it even though her knowing he loved her would be just as terrifying as facing the Dark Lord.

"Yes my Lord?" said Draco turning to Voldemort.

"I see you brought the girl. What a lovely outfit you've chosen for her and such fabulous jewelry."

The crowd laughed at his words and Voldemort smiled.

"You instructed me to have her dressed for the occasion," Draco answered.

"That I did," said Voldemort. "And you seemed to have listened" he smiled again only this time the expression was so, very, very, much darker. "Bring her to me."

* * *

 **Okay, slightly back to a cliff-hanger ending.**

 **Did you like the tension between Draco and Hermione? The almost connections and almost comforts? If you did please let me know.**


	25. Chapter 23: The Dance

**THERE IS A BIG NOTE ON CANNON AT THE END-BOOK vs. MOVIE. So don't get mad till you've read that please.** (or don't get mad at all.)

 **Thank you to everyone who reviewed since last chapter especially: tomfeltonswifey,** addictedtoloveandfiction, .babe, Scorpia11, ElizColl, LovEToReadit, inkwolf199, mollsballs, gpullen , alluringmango, Ayr, Addfam2008 , LillsBills , ChildofBrisingr and the guests: Who and Marissa Bixler. **And everyone who has taken the time to respond since. You are all appreciated.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. Reader Discretion is advised.**

* * *

Chapter 23: The Dance

 _"_ _Bring her to me."_

Voldemort's words rang like a death sentence in Draco's ears and he was paralyzed for a split second.

This was Draco's worst possible fear for the night coming to fruition.

How had he actually deceived himself into thinking that if he played his cards right, if he chose the prefect dress, and the perfect display he could somehow fly below the radar and help get Hermione through this night unscathed.

 _You were stupid to hope,_ his darkest side sneered.

The Dark Lord wanted Granger. There was no possible excuse to refuse.

Draco could feel the expectant eyes of everyone in the room on him. The tension was palpable even though it was clear they all expected Draco to just give his captive over to Voldemort willingly.

 _You can't hand her over to him…_ his mind protested.

 _You don't have a choice._

Surely the dark Lord wouldn't kill her now? He still needed her. If Draco made a fuss it would only make things worse.

 _Don't give yourself away, you owe it to her to be strong._

Draco turned to Granger and tried to convey with his eyes just how sorry he was, while keeping his face schooled into a perfect mask of haughty disregard for her as a person.

He gave the chain a small tug letting her know she should fight.

Hermione clearly got the message because as Draco walked forward with her towards the Dark Lord she let out a blood curdling scream and began to struggle in earnest pulling at the collar and calling out for help.

"No, please no!" she screamed. She reached out towards the other guests. Her fingers outstretched and pleading. Anyone who was near backed away immediately giving them a wide birth.

 _How can you do this to her?_

He knew she was acting, he knew she was faking and yet…a part of it had to be real. She had to know that whatever was coming her way would not be pleasant.

Every step felt like a battle. It took everything to keep moving forward.

 _You knew something like this would happen,_ Draco reminded himself trying to steel his nerves against the sound of Hermione begging for help.

 _And yet you still brought her along knowing…_

Draco did his best ignored her pleas and the barrage of thoughts screaming in his head.

For the briefest of moments he entertained the idea of simply aparating them both away. They could run. They could hide. They could go to the order and escape.

Then Draco caught his mother's gaze across the room. She was standing with his father. Her hand went to the base of her throat and he saw the fear around the edges of her eyes.

He could not abandon her.

His mother who had always been there for him, who had always loved and supported him. Who thought so little of him now and yet still, would do anything to protect him. He could not leave her to be tortured and ruined by the Dark Lord.

A flicker of Resentment passed through him. Even though he was doing this-staying- for his mother, some part of his mind hated her for putting him in the position where he had to choose between the only two people in the world whom he loved.

He wished that he could just tell her the truth and have her run away with him as well.

He also knew that was impossible. Above all things Narcissa Malfoy valued loyalty. Which was why she had stood by her husband through thick and thin. For better or worse a part of her was loyal to his father as she was loyal to him. His mother loved deeply and loyally and it was her greatest strength, but in this moment was also her weakness.

In that moment the flicker of resentment towards his mother turned into a full raging fire of hate towards his father. It was Lucius fault that they were in this whole mess in the first place. His father's desire for hunger. His father's loyalty to the Dark Lord, whether born out of fear or greed, had doomed them all.

Draco made his way the final few steps across the hall to Voldemort.

Voldemort smiled at Hermione struggle, his pale grey skin pulling back from his teeth making him look like a viper about to strike.

Draco wanted to punch him in his maw of a mouth. He wanted to pull out his wand and just Avada-Kadabra the Dark Lord.

The only thing stopping him was the fact that he knew he wouldn't get past pulling the wand. When he failed…the fate for an attempt would be worse than death. He might left alive to be tortured daily as entertainment and Hermione would have it worse…

He didn't care at this point what happened to himself. He did however, care about Hermione's fate. He needed to keep her safe which meant he needed to stay in the Dark Lord's good graces, if there was such a thing.

 _You call this keeping her safe?_

When they were in front of the Dark Lord, Voldemort held out his hand grey hand, open palmed, and Draco put the tiny gold leash in Voldemort's hand stepping back stiffly.

 _Please Merlin be merciful,_ Draco silently pleaded _._

Draco's hand went to his wand without him thinking.

He twitched, when he realized what he had done and brought it back out front crossing his arms over his chest. Had anyone seen?

Across the room he saw Snape watching him intently and saw the older man relax slightly. Draco knew his mentor had seen his hand twitch on his wand. No one else was looking at him though, everyone's eyes were focused on Granger and the Dark Lord.

0-0-0-0-

"You look lovely," Voldemort grabbed hold of Granger by the neck. "For a Mudblood."

The room laughed and Voldemort joined them turning his head to glance at every face in the room. He wanted to see the smiles from his minions. He wanted to know his followers agreed with him.

When the Dark Lord's gaze came to Draco, Draco forced a sound from his lips, but it could not be called a laugh. No one seemed to notice, not even the dark Lord who just continued looking past Draco to the next wizard in the circle.

 _You need to be more convincing, if he had been really looking…_ Draco warned himself.

Draco tried to force a smile, tried to make it seem genuine, as if he could enjoy this, but he could not bring himself to laugh at Hermione's pain, even if it was to save her, it was too much to ask.

Hermione struggled against the Dark Lords grasp and Voldemort tossed her down to the ground.

She fell like rag doll, the sound of her landing a harsh slap against Draco's eardrums.

The room went silent.

Voldemort looked around, this time his gaze was hard. Challenging anyone to flinch or turn away. He sneered and then looked back at Hermione who had crawled several feet away.

"That gown," said Voldemort raising his wand, "lovely as it is, is much too elegant for someone of your station."

Voldemort lashed out with a flick of the wrist and the dress that Draco had spent so much time selecting for Hermione, was cut to ribbons leaving her barely covered in what was now wisps of that dark fabric.

The floor length train had been severed so that the vast majority of her milky white thighs were revealed for all to see. A small amount of fabric remained covering her breasts while part of her stomach was exposed.

She struggled hands clawing at the ground in an effort to pick up the fallen fabric and cover herself. The chains that Draco had attached to her hampered her movements and made a loud clinking sound with every adjustment she made.

She looked utterly mortified.

Draco couldn't stand it.

He moved forward instinctively and a hand landed firmly on his shoulder staying him. He went to wrench himself out of the grasp at his shoulder and looked back to see that it was Snape at his side holding him in place.

He hadn't noticed the dark haired man move across the room to his side. That fact unnerved Draco because it told him just how unaware of his surroundings he had become while focused on Hermione.

His mentor gave the smallest shake of his head.

"I wouldn't if I were you," Snape said in quiet warning.

Draco ground his teeth knowing Snape was right. If he tried to intervene now it would only make things worse.

 _That's all you do,_ his mind chided, _make things worse._

Draco was suddenly thankful for the hand that had held him back. Thankful that Snape had prevented him from something that would have given his feelings away.

 _You need to get control over yourself Draco, if not for your own sake for hers._

Draco re-crossed his arms over his chest and fought the urge to do something completely reckless like run to Hermione and beg to take her place.

 _Don't let your love doom you both,_ he scolded himself.

"There is a place for creatures like this," said Voldemort pointing down at Hermione. "And that place is beneath us."

Voldemort raised his leg slowly and placed a bare foot on Hermione's chest. He raised his arm above his head dramatically, his long sleeve falling back towards his shoulder revealing a pale muscled bicep which was flexed ready to attack.

The whole room held its breath.

Every muscle in Draco's body locked waiting.

 _Please, let her live,_ Draco begged.

"Imperio!" Voldemort cast.

You could have heard a pin drop in the room.

Draco's heart pounded in his chest and he felt a rushing in his ears.

Not the killing curse, not the crutiatus…the Imperius. Fear overrode all other thoughts, fear of what Voldemort would make Hermione do.

Even though she was the one underneath the Imperius curse Draco felt suddenly powerless too.

 _You used the Imperius curse before_ , he told himself.

 _And it was wrong,_ he answered back.

At the time it had seemed necessary to use it. He had been ordered by the Dark Lord himself to kill Dumbledore….A task which was punishment for his own father's failures. A task which Snape had taken his place in completing at his mother's insistence and by the power of the unbreakable vow he had made to her.

Draco's mind went back to the night on the bell tower. The memory took hold blocking out everything else. He saw Dumbledore standing across from him, heard the old man's words.

 _"You almost killed Katie Bell and Ronald Weasley. You have been trying, with increasing desperation, to kill me all year. Forgive me, Draco, but they have been feeble attempts. . . . So feeble, to be honest, that I wonder whether your heart has been really in it."_

Draco swallowed, pushing back the memory. His heart hadn't been in the attempts to kill Dumbledore it was true. Yet, what he had done…using the Imperius on Katie...it was still wrong.

Like this, what Voldemort was doing, was wrong.

Voldemort lifted his foot, from Grangers chest and stepped back.

"Get up my dear," Voldemort said in a gentle tone.

Hermione stood.

"Smile for me," he ordered.

Hermione smiled.

Draco felt a creeping terror climb up his spine and take hold of his whole body in a cold fist.

"You are far too beautiful to just let be a wall flower," the Dark Lord Proclaimed and looked around. "Don't you think?"

There were nods and tentative murmurs of agreement from the crowd.

Voldemort turned back to Hermione.

"Dance for us," he commanded and clapped his hands. "Music!" he ordered and the music began.

Draco saw Hermione's eyes go milky white for a moment and realized she was struggling against the command. He could see her body stiffen as if fighting an invisible force.

Across the space between Draco's eyes met hers and he prayed she would just go along with it. He knew it was easier if you just went along with it.

Hopefully dancing was the worst of what he asked of her.

Dancing wasn't so bad.

Dancing was nothing compared to what the Dark Lord _could_ make her do.

Hermione seemed to relax looking at him and her eyes went clear again. Her body softened and her head tilted listening to the strings.

All at once she snapped into motion began to dance around the room twirling and spinning in time to the music. She looked liquid, her body moving seamlessly with the music as if it were the only thing in the world for her. Draco knew that right now it was the only thing in the world for her. Every ounce of her was focused on each note and step.

A more congruous circle formed in the crowd giving Hermione a wide berth and a stage for the performance.

Under different circumstanced Draco would have loved to watch Hermione dance like this.

"Very good," said Voldemort. "See?" he gestured to the room and then back at Hermione. "They can be many things for us. Servants, playthings, entertainment," he looked pointedly at Draco. "Relief of sexual tension." He turned back to the room. "They can be all of those things. But there is one thing that they cannot be." He turned looking at each person. "Does anyone know what that is?"

A silence followed in which there was only the music and the sound of Hermione's heels connecting with the stone floor. There was not a single word of conversion.

"Come now," said Voldemort. "Someone tell me. I know you know the answer."

Draco's heart pounded.

He knew the answer.

He couldn't bring himself to say it out loud.

 _You have to,_ he told himself and mustered the breath.

"Our equals," pronounced Draco loudly knowing it was exactly what Voldemort wanted to hear.

It had been engrained in him since birth: No Mudblood was ever equal to a Pure-blood. The lesson drilled in him repeatedly with the hardness of his father's cane.

Voldemort turned to Draco.

"Yessss," he almost hissed. "Young Lord Malfoy knows the truth of it," Voldemort smiled. "They can be many things, but they will never. Never. Be. Our. Equal."

* * *

Hermione danced.

She wanted to dance.

She couldn't remember the reason why.

HE had told her to and she didn't like him.

But Draco had looked at her.

Draco had wanted her to dance.

And HE had told her too.

So she had to.

She wanted to.

The music was beautiful.

She felt the music pull her.

She spun and listened to the music.

Not the words, not to the conversation.

Just the music.

Did Draco like the way she was dancing?

Her foot twisted slightly and she fell.

Pain shot through her ankle and she let out a small cry.

She lay half sideways on the floor for a moment.

"Get up," she heard the order.

She obeyed struggling to her feet.

Her ankle hurt.

It wavered in the high heel.

"Don't stop dancing," HE commanded.

She danced on.

It hurt.

Gods it hurt with every step.

But she wanted to dance.

She HAD to dance.

The music changed-The tempo increased.

"Dance sexier," the order came, the tone was dark and made her skin crawl.

"Dance like you want every man and woman in this room to fuck you."

 _No_

The protest went through her and she twitched.

She did not want everyone to want to fuck her.

If they wanted it they might act on it and she didn't want that.

Greyback was in the room.

Her stomach rolled.

She fought the curse.

 _Voldemort is_ _making you do this._

 _You have to fight this._

 _It's the Imperius..._

Her eyes searched the room

Where was Draco?

Finally she found him.

Draco was standing with Snape, his arms folded over his chest.

She met his eyes.

He looked in pain.

He looked angry.

She lifted her hand to reach out and he shook his head.

"I said Dance!" the Crutiatus curse hit her and pain ripped her world wide open.

She fell to the ground shaking.

She screamed.

And screamed.

The pain went on.

And on.

Then it stopped.

She breathed.

When the pain was gone she got up.

And she danced.

She was sex.

Sex come to life on the dance floor.

Her body was a tool.

She needed sex.

She wanted them all to want her.

Especially Draco.

She wanted him to want her.

She danced for them all.

She danced for Draco.

Draco was watching and she danced for him.

* * *

 **AUTHORS NOTE ON CANNON IMPORTANT PLEASE READ** **: So, in the books there is nothing written about verbal indicators of the Imperius curse. In the movies when Viktor Krum is under the curse during the Tri-Wizard cup his eyes go milky. I read a really cool fan theory and am using it here. The theory was the eyes would only go milky when the person was actively fighting the spell. This made sense to me because otherwise having milky eyes would be a dead give-away that someone was under the curse and people wouldn't be able to get away with much wandering around with an obvious tell. I liked the idea that it only happens when someone strong is fighting with all they have to break free of it-that fan theory also makes me like Viktor's character more.**

 **I wanted to put this at the beginning of the chapter but figured it would kind of be a spoiler. Thank you so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you think of the fan theory or just what you think of the chapter or story so far in general. Cheers**


	26. Chapter 24: The Request

**So, this chapter is actually a split from the previous chapter. While editing it ended up almost doubling in length and so I decided to split it from one chapter into two in order to focus on fleshing it out and not being worried about it being too long for someone to enjoy reading in one sitting. And I do hope you enjoy.**

 **Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and review. Your reviews make my day and are one of the reasons I have gone back and spent so many hours editing this story to try and use your advice to make it better.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. Reader Discretion is advised.**

* * *

Chapter 24: The Request

Draco watched as Hermione twirled and whirled through the room.

When she had first started dancing she had looked graceful and beautiful, now she looked like an exotic dancer. He could feel the whole temperature of the room rise as the other witches and wizards felt the sex coming off of her in waves.

Voldemort moved around the circle until he reached Draco and stopped to stand by his young pupil. He wrapped his arm awkwardly around Draco's shoulder pulling him in tight. On his other side Snape shifted back slightly.

"See how lovely she is," The Dark Lord leaned into Draco speaking in his ear, his breath cool and sticky.

A shudder of revulsion passed through Draco.

He wanted to rip out Voldemort's eyes for even looking at Hermione.

He could feel the gentle probe of the Dark Lord on the outskirts of his mind and so Draco forced himself to look at Hermione and focus on her movements and how beautiful she looked. He focused on the sex and imagined what it would be like to have her dance for him this way without the curse and without an audience.

He felt the Dark Lord's presence retreat, satisfied at the carnal lust it had seen on the surface of Draco's thoughts.

"Not bad for what she is," answered Draco. Somehow he kept the venom out of his voice.

Draco wanted to wrap his hands around Voldemort's neck and kill him with his bare hands for making Hermione do this and for making her dance when she was clearly in pain. Everyone had seen Hermione fall and seen the pain in her whole body when she went down. Now she was dancing on that ankle and Draco _knew_ every step had to hurt. The Dark Lord was making her hurt herself and Draco wanted to hurt him for it.

On top of everything Voldemort had used the Crutiatus on her.

There was a reason it was called an unforgivable curse. To use it really was unforgivable.

 _It's the one you've used the most on her…_ his mind argued.

It was also the curse that Draco was most familiar with for being on the receiving end. His aunt had taught him it and made sure he was familiar with both giving and receiving. His father had used it on him a handful of times. None of those had compared with how it had felt coming at the hands of the Dark Lord, it had been miles worse than any other time he had experience it.

He never wanted to feel that pain again. And yet, given the option Draco would have gladly taken that pain in Hermione's stead if just to prevent ever hearing those screams again. She had been in agony and it had hurt Draco more to hear her pain, than to experience the curse.

Voldemort pulled back to look at Draco and for a moment he worried that he had let some of his thoughts show.

"You look pale boy," said Voldemort.

 _Please tell me he didn't see_ , Draco begged. He had been stupid to think without guarding his thoughts.

If Voldemort had seen anything his whole demeanor showed no indication.

"You've been through a lot, these last few days," said Voldemort in a tone that could have been considered sympathetic. "You should sit."

Voldemort waved to one of the nearby Deatheater's and Draco was brought a chair. He sat, even though he wanted to stand. It would be rude to turn down what looked outwardly like kindness on the part of the Dark Lord.

Voldemort patted his shoulder.

"There," he smiled down at Draco. "Isn't that better?"

"Yes," answered Draco, though nothing could make it better.

He had been watching Hermione dance for the last half an hour. The way she was moving was absolutely beautiful and Draco hated it absolutely.

He hated it because it wasn't Granger: not really. It was the Dark Lord moving her like a puppet-master pulling strings.

Draco never wanted Hermione to be a puppet. He wanted to her be free and this total loss of will was the exact opposite of freedom.

"Come here," Voldemort called to Granger. She obeyed dancing over to him and continuing to sway her hips to the music as she waited for further instructions.

"Dance for Draco," said the Dark Lord and Draco stiffened.

Hermione looked at Draco and began to move her hips more seductively in time with the music.

"The rest of you can dance or watch," said Voldemort effectively releasing the circle around them.

Those that hadn't wanted to watch immediately turned away and began to dance in time with the music. Others came closer to Draco and Hermione to get a better view of the dancing girl and the scene unfolding at the Dark Lord's will.

How many of them wished they were in Draco's place?

How many of them thought that this was a reward?

Draco knew it was supposed to be a reward. It disturbed him to be in the Dark Lord's favor.

Draco looked in Hermione's eyes and felt cold. It was like she wasn't fully there behind those beautiful eyes and the person who was behind those eyes was the person he loved. The body was there but the woman he loved wasn't.

"Come on girl. You can do better than that," Voldemort slapped her face and Hermione's head turned to the side. Draco nearly jumped from his chair. His hands went to fists on his thighs.

 _I am going to kill you someday_ , Draco thought darkly.

When Hermione's head came back around her eyes flashed milky before going clear. "Dance on him," said Voldemort

Hermione came closer and straddled Draco on the chair.

Draco took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a brief moment fighting against the sudden desire that the position created.

She was warm, her skin was soft, her limbs firm.

Hermione began to move and grind against him and gods, Draco wanted her to stop because his body was betraying him and his mind was fighting it.

He didn't want to get hard, didn't want to touch her when she was like this, it felt like a betrayal of her trust, but her body was too close and to perfect and was moving in a way that screamed for him to touch her.

Draco put his hands on her hips, trying to control the movements a little, trying to keep her away from the center of his lap. It was no use, she had her orders and her body molded onto his. He saw the moment she felt his reaction.

He saw her eyes go milky again.

 _She's fighting this, she doesn't want this._

Disgust shot though Draco. He grabbed hold of her hair and yanked her in close with a harsh jerk. Hermione let out a gasp and he whispered softly so only she could hear.

"I'm sorry Granger, forgive me," he kissed her neck ostentatiously and then let her go.

When she pulled back her face softened and her eyes went clear. Letting him know she understood that he didn't want her touching him against her will. He was glad she under

She got up and turned away from him sitting back down on his lap and grinding against him. She was so warm. Draco felt burned by the heat between them

Draco rested his hands on Hermione's hips feeling the bones beneath his palms as he attempted to keep control of himself. He closed his eyes against the onslaught of feelings warring within him and kissed the soft skin on her back.

Draco felt a shudder go through Hermione and it echoed in him.

He immediately wished with all his might that he could take the kiss back. He had done it for show but he couldn't stand the idea of her shuddering with revulsion at his touch.

It was one thing for her not to want to lean into his touch and it was an entirely different thing for her to be…disgusted by it.

 _What else did you expect?_

The Dark Lord laughed and clapped at the show.

Draco looked up at Voldemort and silently begged for an end to this.

"You will listen to Draco and stop when he tells you to." Voldemort ordered Hermione holding her chin. Then he released her and turned to Draco.

"Tell her to stop when you get tired," he said. "And you can take her up to your room and…finish."

"Thank you my lord," Draco managed to keep most of the fury out of his voice and so it came across as a lusty sound to everyone else's ears except his own.

The party raged on around them and Draco pressed his hands into Hermione's hips holding her, feeling like she was an anchor and he was drowning.

"Lucky bastard," he heard someone say in the crowd and it made him want to puke.

 _This is wrong on so many levels._

Everything in Draco screamed out against this. He wanted to get up and walk away, whisk Hermione away from all of this and tell her he was sorry, that he never meant for any of this to happen.

He wanted this to end.

Draco let several moments pass out of necessity, hating each one, before he told her to stop.

* * *

"Dance for Draco," the order came.

Hermione looked at Draco.

Draco's eyes were hard.

 _Why are you mad at me Draco?_

 _Am I not dancing well enough for you?_

Her ankle throbbed and she swayed her hips.

She watched his eyes follow her movements and it made her happy that he was watching.

She wanted him to watch.

Before when she wanted everyone to want her she had wanted him to want her more.

Now she could just dance for him

This was better.

Now she could just be with Draco.

Draco wanting her didn't feel bad, not like the others.

Draco wanting her didn't make her skin crawl.

Draco wanting her wasn't dangerous.

 _That's because he doesn't really want you_ , a small part of her mind echoed.

She pushed the thought away.

 _Yes he does_ , she answered.

"Come on girl. You can do better than that."

The slap hit her hard and she let out a cry.

 _You bastard,_ the thought came and then the thought went like a fleeting flicker of fire.

"Dance on him."

Dance on Draco?

The order was clear.

She knew what she had to do.

She had to dance.

She had to dance on Draco.

The pull of the order hit her and Hermione moved to straddle Draco.

She saw him take a deep breath like he was fighting something.

With most of her skirt gone it was easy to straddle him.

She moved her hips.

His legs were so hard and strong beneath her.

It felt nice.

Then she felt another hardness join.

She blinked.

 _No, not like this._

She began to fight the order

She didn't want him like this.

This was wrong.

She wanted to cry.

Suddenly his hand was in her hair pulling her close.

"I'm sorry Granger, forgive me," he said and his lips touched her neck in a kiss.

The gentle kiss rocked her to her foundations.

His words cut through to her.

He understood.

He didn't want it this way either.

 _That's because he doesn't want you_ , her mind argued.

But she needed to dance for him.

She didn't want to look at him though.

Didn't want to know, to see, that he didn't want this.

A part of her wanted him, and wanted him to want it…even though it was wrong.

Everything was wrong.

Hermione got up and turned away from him and then settled back down on his lap to dance.

She ground against him because that was what she was supposed to do.

That's what HE told her to.

So that was what she did.

Draco rested his hands on her hips.

Hermione liked his hands there.

His hands were so strong and elegant.

He kissed the soft skin on her back.

She shuddered, wanting more.

 _It's okay to want it,_ a voice inside her whispered.

 _You're supposed to make him want you._

 _It's what you're supposed to do._

 _Kiss me again Draco._

"You will listen to Draco and stop when he tells you to," she heard the order and nodded slightly.

She would stop when Draco said.

"Tell her to stop when you get tired," she heard Voldemort tell Draco "And you can take her up to your room and finish."

 _Finish?_

 _Yes, finish._

They would have sex.

For a moment a piece of her fought again.

Then the fight vanished melting away

"Thank you my lord," Draco answered.

The Dark Lord left and for a moment there was only Draco.

She danced for him.

She wanted him.

She didn't need to think of anything else.

There was nothing else worth thinking about.

Thinking about anything else made her sad and angry.

Thinking about Draco and dancing made her happy.

The party raged on around them and Draco pressed his hands into Hermione.

Time passed and she danced.

Her body responded to the closeness and the grinding.

Her body was ready for him.

 _Kiss me again Draco, please. I want your lips, your hands._

She leaned back into him.

"You can stop now," he said softly in her ear and she blinked.

* * *

The haze around Hermione's vision slowly faded away and she stiffened as reality came back to her bit by bit. A cold flush washed across her and her stomach rolled violently.

She wanted to be sick.

The child-like compliance that she had felt. The feeling…the desire to obey faded into the background giving way to a feeling of sheer revulsion at what she had done.

Hermione hadn't been able to fight it.

Worse, after the Crutiatus she hadn't _wanted_ to fight it.

"Come," Draco said, his voice loud enough that everyone around could hear. "Let's get you back to the room."

Hermione nodded mutely, not trusting herself to speak.

She caught Snape's eyes as they passed and looked away ashamed of what he had seen and what she had done.

More than anything though she was ashamed of what she had wanted.

Time seemed to move without involving her in it's plans and Hermione found herself suddenly in Draco's room sitting on the edge of his bed as he handed her a glass of water.

She took the cup from his hands mechanically and drank.

 _What have I done…_

"Hermione, I'm sorry," Draco's voice drew her attention. His eyes looked so sad.

"I never wanted to touch you like that."

"I know," she said nodding, feeling numb.

"You believe me?"

"Yes," she nodded again and suddenly there were tears clouding her vision. "I'm sorry. I know you didn't want my touch either."

"Not like that," answered Draco and Hermione was to numb to notice what he was really saying.

"I need to lay down," she said and turned sideways laying down on his bed. She didn't hesitate because his bed was the closest and because the second she lay down she could smell Draco all around her and it made her feel safe despite everything.

She wanted to bury her face in the sheets and forget everything for a little while, instead she just lay there numbly looking out past Draco at the wall.

"Okay," Said Draco, stepping back away from her "Whatever you need."

Whatever she needed?

She needed to leave, she needed to escape.

She needed out of the tattered pathetic excuse for a dress that she was wearing.

That last thought propelled her from the bed and Hermione rose, her moment's rushed. She grabbed the box, and the clothes from earlier that day and picked them up half running to the bathroom.

Her ankle hurt so much her eyes watered even though she didn't want to cry.

She didn't dare look back at Draco afraid of what she would see. She flung open the bathroom door, went inside, slamming the door behind her she buried her face in the stack of clothes and tissue and screamed into the mass of fabric and paper.

She screamed out all the anger and all the frustration and all the pain.

Her eyes watered from pain and overflowed.

She hated Voldemort.

She hoped Harry won and killed the bastard.

He was Evil and he needed to die.

 _What has happened to you?_ The voice inside her asked.

Hermione had never wished for someone's death before but she did not want Voldemort to get away or to go to Askaban.

She wanted him Dead.

For what he had done to her and what he had done to so many before her.

He deserved to die.

Hermione pulled back from the pile and a faint shimmering caught her eye.

Hermione paused looking at the shimmer quizzically and then reached between the folds of fabric and pulled out the note from earlier that day.

She watched as the light gave way to lines of text.

 **If you're reading this Granger I know you're crying, please don't.**

 **I'm sorry that things are how they are.**

 **We will get word to your friends and figure out a way to get us both out of here.**

 **I promise.**

 **In the meantime, yes, you have to go to the ball, but I hope you like what I picked out for you.**

 **Strange as it may sound, I did try.**

 **I went with something that covered as much as possible without being so modest as to incur "His" Wrath.**

 **With any luck the night will go on without an issue. I am hoping that the Dark Lord only wants you there for the visual prestige of a somewhat interesting and important prisoner.**

 **I will do everything I can to keep you safe.**

 **Don't worry about anyone seeing this message, the words will only last as long as the page is wet.**

 **-Draco**

Hermione ran her fingers over the words written so beautifully in Draco's cursive.

 ** _I will everything I can to keep you safe_**

Those words stood out calling to her.

Draco had written them to comfort her if she was crying and had hidden them away beneath magic. Even though she wasn't really crying now her tears had touched the page and she knew that was what had triggered their appearance.

Suddenly all of his behavior before they had gone down to the gala made sense.

He had been preparing himself for the possibility that he would have to hurt her. The distancing she had felt had been him closing everything down so that he could deal with it.

 _You saw inside his head, you know he cares, imagine what it's like for him making you scream._

Hermione thought back to how it had felt to see Draco in pain when the Dark Lord had tortured him.

The memory of Draco's cries ached more than when the Dark Lord had turned his wand on her. Being on the receiving end of the Dark Lords Wrath had been overwhelming, the pain had been blinding, excruciating and absolutely unbearable-but that pain was gone. To think of her own pain at his hands made Hermione shudder. The fear of it happening again had a small sweat breaking out along her spine, but that wasn't the same as the ache that remembering Draco's screams that sound still hurt.

Hermione dropped her hands away from her face.

She couldn't think that. She couldn't handle it. It was too much. Her own pain was in the way of her to be able to feel bad for Draco having to hurt her...and yet she did.

 _He is out on the other side of that door waiting for you._

Hermione suddenly realized that Draco was probably beating himself up for everything that had just happened.

What had happened was horrible, she still felt sick from having touched him like that, but she couldn't let him blame himself for it and she knew that's what he was probably doing. Standing there hands at his side looking at his own bathroom door thinking of her and blaming himself for having touched her.

 _It's your fault you couldn't fight it,_ she told herself. _You're fault for not being stronger_

 _Maybe you weren't really trying because you wanted him so you used Voldemort's Imperius as an excuse to touch him when you knew it was wrong._

It made Hermione hate herself to think she had forced anything on Draco when he had done everything in his power to keep her from having anything forced on her.

 _You have to let him know you're sorry and that you don't blame him_.

Hastened by those thoughts Hermione changed quickly into Draco's clothes. She caught sight of her blotchy face in the mirror and splashed water on her face to try and even out the tone and hide the evidence of her tears. Then she hobbled out to Draco's bedroom to face him.

Draco was sitting on the edge of his bed. He had removed his tie and was holding it loosely in his hands. His shoulders were slumped forward, his head down looking at the floor.

When she came into the room his head jerked up and his eyes met hers.

Slowly Draco stood and faced her.

Hermione didn't know what to say. She didn't know where to start.

"I'm sorry," said Draco breaching the silence. "I know you probably can't forgive me, but I am sorry."

"Draco," Hermione shook her head.

"Please believe me," his voice was pleading and she heard it hitch.

"I believe you are sorry," Hermione swallowed and straightened her shoulders "But you don't have to be. I don't blame you." _I blame myself and…"_ I blame HIM."

Draco shook his head.

"I should have figured out a way-" he started.

"No," Hermione interrupted him "If I were stronger I would have simply resisted and then you wouldn't have to be sitting here feeling guilty."

"Don't you dare blame yourself for this!" Draco practically yelled.

Hermione opened her mouth to tell him that he was wrong.

"No!" Draco stormed over to her. "You are not allowed to take the blame. Do you hear me?" He wrapped his hands around her biceps and gave her a little shake. "This was not your fault."

"It was."

"No it wasn't!"

"I should have fought harder!"

"God dammit Hermione!" Draco released her and his hands fisted.

In one swift and fluid motion Draco turned and punched the wall.

Hermione jumped from the violence and let out a little squeak.

His fist had gone straight though the drywall and was embedded several inches past his wrist.

Hermione froze in shock. And then she was limping over to him, needing to be near him, to take away some of the pain, some of the blame that he was carrying.

She reached out to him and then stopped, afraid to touch him.

"Draco," she said his name softly.

"Please-" he said, eyes closed. "Please promise me you won't blame yourself." His voice was breathy and harsh like he was trying to climb up a cliff just to maintain control.

"Only if you promise me the same," said Hermione coming to stand close to him, her fingers hesitated inches from his shoulder.

"I can't," he shook his head.

Hermione wracked her brain for a way to distract Draco from thinking of this as being his fault. She couldn't let him carry the blame, not when she herself felt responsible.

"Then make it up to me," she said and gently pulled lightly on his arm.

Draco followed her lead and pulled his fist back from the wall and she saw that two of the knuckles were bleeding.

"Anything," he said and turned to her. "I'll do anything you ask."

Hermione looked up at Draco and knew that in that moment he meant it.

She could ask for anything she wanted from him in this moment and he would give it.

Those beautiful intense eyes of his were ravaged by emotion.

He looked like he was going to break into a million pieces.

He looked how she felt…maybe worse.

A part of Hermione knew what she would ask for before she even formed the full thought, but once it took hold it became the only thing that mattered. It was the only thing she needed right then.

So she held his gaze and opened her mouth and asked him for what she wanted.

She looked him in the eyes and said:

"Hold me."

* * *

 **Thanks so much for reading. If you enjoyed this chapter please take a second before hitting that next button to leave a quick review.**


	27. Chapter 25: The Salve

**A big thank you goes out to everyone who reviewed since last update especially** : Amblure100p, Clovergirl100, inkwolf199 , Sir Savien , Rouch , ChildofBrisingr, catsy27, mega700201, AnayaR , Ayr, .babe, LillsBills, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Scorpia11 **and guests** : Powerpuff, Finn3, Guest **and** D

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. Reader Discretion advised.**

* * *

Chapter 25: The Salve

"Hold me."

The words were out of Hermione's mouth before they had even finished being thought.

 _You had the chance to ask him for anything and this is what you ask for?_ The logical side of her mind practically screamed at her for being so stupid.

Her other side couldn't bring itself to regret the words.

She wanted arms wrapped around her to make her feel safe and she wanted those arms to be Draco's for reasons she refused to examine closer.

"What?" Draco balked at her stepping back.

Hermione knew that this was the only chance that she would get to back out from what she had just asked. A part other mind scrambled madly for excuses trying to figure out something she could say to yank her back from the honesty of the words she had just spoken.

The truth was too raw…it made her vulnerable.

There is no courage in hiding from the truth.

Hermione lifted her eyes to Draco and looked at him intently.

She was not going to back away from the truth of her own needs.

"I need you to hold me," she admitted.

 _What are you doing?_ The rational side of her demanded, the mental voice sounding frantic inside her head. She shushed it and stood firm. Her emotional side, which-every once and a while- was known for overriding the locical side didn't care about what was safe or rational or smart.

He had offered her what she needed

And right now she needed Draco.

She needed to be held.

"You said anything," said Hermione, her voice oddly calm and entirely at odds with the war raging inside her. "And I am telling you that my anything is that I need to be held."

Hermione mustered the courage to go on and open up even more despite the fact that every word she said put her at more at his mercy. She knew if he turned her away it would rip a hole right through her now.

She wanted to be strong, she wanted not to need this. What she wanted had little bearing on what she needed, which was to close out the world and feel safe and she couldn't do that right now without admitting the truth to Draco. It was stupid and reckless and emotionally self-sabotaging, and yet she knew this was the only time she could ask for it and not have to worry one iota about being rejected or refused. He wouldn't rip her in half by turning away…

He wouldn't

And yet a small part of her was terrified he would.

"I need to pretend that what happened out there didn't just happen," she managed in response to his silence. "And I need you to pretend with me so I can be okay."

Hermione hadn't dared be this blatantly, unflinchingly, honest in a long time.

She could see Draco struggling with everything that she was saying and the fact that he had told her he would do 'anything'

His silence made all the words want to tumble out of Hermione to fill the emptiness between them.

"Please just Hold me and make it go away," she half pleaded.

Her tone changed something in Draco and she watched his posture shift as he processed her words.

"Do you want me to take away the memory?" he asked hesitantly.

Hermione rocked back away from him a half a step and then, seeing where he was coming from and that he was genuinely only trying to make it better she brought her foot back forwards and stood strong in front of him.

"No," she shook her head. "I need to remember."

"I don't understand," Draco answered quickly. "Why do you need to remember? How can you want me next to you after that?"

"Because I need to know what I am fighting against. A dark that things what happened tonight is okay when it isn't. It can never be okay. I feel lost and alone and…and," The words came tumbling out. "I need to feel like I'm not alone Draco. I **_hurt_** and I need someone who cares."

It took everything she had inside to keep the waver and desperation out of her voice. Hermione felt like everything, her strength, her will to fight, everything was hanging on a precarious thread and if Draco turned her away now it would snap and send her crashing down into darkness.

 _Please, care enough…_ she silently prayed.

"I care," Draco answered and she felt a flicker of hope,

"Then please," she said. "Just be with me."

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Draco stood looking at Hermione wanting to bolt from the room, and simultaneously hold her forever.

 _You can't hold her, its' not your place to hold her._

 _You told her anything,_ the other side argued. _You can't just go back on that at the first request._

 _You owe her._

Draco closed his eyes.

"Okay," he said quietly and he heard the rush of air escape from her lips as if she had been holding her breath waiting for his response.

Draco opened his eyes to look at her and got lost in them for a moment. He remembered how she had tried to comfort and hold him earlier that evening before all this happened. He remembered how tempting it had been to just wrap his arms around her and let her be what he had wanted and needed in that moment.

 _Be what she needs now,_ the best part of him ordered.

Draco felt like there were gears inside him grinding against one another.

"I need to look at that ankle first," said Draco stalling for time it was an excuse, but a valid one, he had seen how she had twisted it while dancing.

 _And now she is here asking to be held…_

He was still reeling from her request and needed to put everything in order in his head.

 _One thing at a time,_ he told himself. _Focus on her and what she needs, one thing at a time._

"If you'll let me take care of it," he added. "I don't want it to get worse."

"Okay."

Hermione, who had been standing perfectly still waiting for his answer, nodded and went to walk over to the bed. With the very first step she let out a cry of pain loosing balance.

Draco's arms shot out and he caught her before she hit the floor.

They stood their looking at each other. Draco's eyes flickered to her lips and Hermione's breathe quickened. He felt that pull, the one he always felt around her, increase.

 _This is not the time for that_ , Draco told himself. _She asked for comfort and to be held. You need to give her that, not take advantage._

Draco straightened and in one smooth motion lifted Hermione into his arms carrying her over to the bed.

"You're stronger than you look," she said.

"Thank you," said Draco. "It's good to know I look like a little weakling to you," he said trying to break the ice.

"You do not, that's not what I meant!" Hermione protested and gave his shoulder a light smack as he lay her down on his bed.

"That's what you made it sound like," he said shaking his head faking disappointment.

Hermione went to protest. He saw the moment she clued into the fact that he was teasing her.

"You jerk-face," she said biting back a laugh.

Draco smiled back at her and her whole demeanor gentled and she shifted towards him.

Draco looked away, knowing that the longer he looked at her smiling face the harder it would be to behave himself the way she needed.

He moved down her long pale legs to her ankle.

Gods how he wanted to stop and pay some attention to those beautiful thighs.

 _Focus Draco,_ he ordered himself sharply and kept his hands from reaching out towards her.

He shifted down the bed and touched her ankle gently.

Hermione hissed jerking away.

"Hush," he said as if he were calming a wounded animal.

"I'm not a baby Draco," she protested though could hear in her voice that she wasn't really upset.

"I know," he said and his eyes could not help but flicker up her body.

Hermione's gaze met his own when he looked up and he felt the heat crackle between them and told himself that it had to be just on his side…any reaction from her was…just his imagination.

Draco cast a simple healing spell and then opened his side drawer and pulled out a salve and a potion.

"Drink this," he said offering it to her.

She took it from his hand and frowned looking at the open knuckles from where he had hit the wall.

Draco pulled his hand back, half hiding it from her view.

He was more than a little ashamed at his loss of control. He hadn't intended on hitting the wall it had just sort of happened. It was the nearest thing to him that wasn't Hermione and he would never hit her…not in anger.

Hermione uncapped the potion took it down in one swig, then set the bottle aside and stretched out her hand expectantly as if she were waiting for him to drop a set of keys in it.

"What?" he asked.

"Give me your hand," she instructed.

"It's fine Granger," said Draco dismissively.

"No its not, you're still bleeding."

"I'll be fine," he said more firmly.

"I don't want you to be fine I want you to be better."

Narcissa's words from the potion room rang loudly in his ears.

" _I want you to be a better man…"_

Draco shook his head, not needing or wanting to hear his mother's voice right now.

"Please," said Hermione. "I won't be able to relax unless you're okay."

Draco squirmed inwardly, unused to someone else wanting to take care of him.

Most of the girls he had dated at Hogwarts had wanted him for his looks or family power, they didn't really want to take care of him or care about his well-being. And the ones who did want to play nurse to him never lasted long after whatever injury he had been milking healed.

"You should look out for yourself," said Draco, a little more gruffly than he intended.

"Then who will look out for you?" she asked and Draco froze.

No one looked out for him.

His mother had…And a part of him knew she would continue, but that was her job. No one else would ever both looking out for him.

"I'll be fine," he reiterated feeling hollow.

He felt her hand on his shoulder and looked up. Draco took one look at Hermione and knew she was not going to let it go.

 _Merlin she's a stubborn witch._

"Fine," he relented. "If it will make you feel better, here you go," Draco handed her a healing salve and let her take his hand.

She was impossibly gently with him as she tended to the split knuckles.

Draco held back the sounds of pain. He didn't want her to know that he touch, gentle as it was, still hurt him. The tingle of the healing salve was blissful. He looked down and saw that his knuckles were already closed and mostly healed.

 _She cares…she would look out for you._

 _Out of a feeling of obligation,_ he countered. _Not because she wants to._

Hermione handed back the bottle of salve and Draco moved numbly to her ankle and put some of the salve on his hands before gently wrapping around her ankle and rubbing it in. He could do this, he could distance himself in order to be what she needed.

Hermione let out a moan.

"Are you okay?" he asked suddenly worried that he had been distracted by his own thoughts and pressed too hard.

"Yeah," she answered and bit her lip. "It hurts but it also feels nice, thank you."

"You don't have to thank me."

"Draco," she said his name a little harshly.

"What?" he asked looking up worried he had hurt her.

"Say 'you're welcome'," Hermione ordered in a very bossy tone.

"What?" Draco blinked up at her.

"You have to **_let_** me thank you when you help me," she insisted. "It makes **_me_** feel better."

"How?" he asked incredulously.

"It's just does," she answered. "So when I say it, just...please..."

"Okay," he nodded. "I don't like it but if it makes you feel better."

"It does."

"Alright."

"Thank you," she said purposefully.

Draco nearly choked on the words but managed to say:

"You're welcome."

The smile she gave him made it worth it. She brightened like he had just given her a new toy.

 _Who knew it took something so simple to make her so happy…_

Draco looked away from the sunshine of her smile and took a little more of the salve and began massaging Granger's foot.

"It's okay, you don't have to do that. They don't hurt that much," she said with a little wave of her hand.

"But they hurt a little don't they?" he asked.

Hermione hesitated.

"Well…yes, but not enough that you have to do that."

"I want to Hermione, please let me make you feel better."

His words gave her pause and after what seemed like a small eternity she finally nodded.

"Okay just lay your head back and relax," he ordered gently.

Hermione obliged and Draco smoothed the salve into her skin massaging the balls of her feet and back to the heels.

When her one foot felt pliant and relaxed in his hand he switched to the other.

Draco had done this for past girlfriends before. He didn't have an obsession or even a particular interest in feet but he did enjoy the faces and sounds of pleasure or approval women tended to make when you gave them a massage after a night in heels.

As if in tune with his thoughts Hermione let out a low moan of appreciation and Draco felt it go straight to his dick.

 _She's so fucking beautiful._

He continued worked for several more long minutes until he noticed her leg grow heavy in his hands and realized she was most of the way asleep. He felt a little proud of his skills and a small sense of satisfaction at knowing he still had the touch.

It was hard for Draco to pull away from her when all he wanted to do was crawl in bed next to her and kiss her goodnight.

 _Behave_ , his conscience ordered.

Draco went to the washroom and washed his hands a small smile lingering at the corner of his lips as he replayed Hermione's relaxing at his touch.

He caught sight of himself in the mirror and paused, hands still under the faucet looking at the scar by his eye. His biggest most visual flaw.

Hermione kind of woman who wouldn't care about that scar, wouldn't care that his face was no longer flawless. She cared about who he was….

 _And that was why she would never be with the likes of you._

Draco let out a sigh and toweled off his hands.

 _If only it was just my face that was ugly_ , _she is the type of woman to look past something like that._

He looked at the white gnarled line over his eye and eyebrow.

 _It's really not that bad..._ he found himself thinking for a split second and then those thoughts were dashed against the ground.

 _Yes it is, everyone else will look at you for it, think of how your own mother reacted to it, he reminded himself._

 _"_ _We can use a glamor to hide it,"_ she had said….or something like that…it didn't matter what mattered was the fact that Hermione was the exception not the rule.

 _In more ways than one…_

Draco let out a disgruntled sound and turned away from the mirror.

 _Fucking stupid,_ he called himself. _You need to stop thinking that she will ever be an option. You are only setting yourself up to get hurt._

 _I don't care if I get hurt, I just want to love her._

But he did care, at least a little and he didn't want to go back out there.

"Draco?" he heard Hermione call his name from the other room. There was a slight desperation in the sound.

He didn't hesitate to come at her call.

"Yes?" he asked as soon as he stepped out of the washroom.

"I thought you had gone," she said sitting up slightly in bed.

"No," he shook his head. "I wouldn't leave you."

"I need you."

Those words slammed into his chest and Draco felt his heart stutter.

He wanted those words.

It wasn't a proclamation of love but it was close enough to make Draco hope.

If she needed him, maybe he could stay in her life after all this was over. If she needed him now maybe she might…

 _Don't be stupid, she'll want to forget you when all this is done._

Draco pushed away the thoughts, because in that moment the future didn't matter. She needed him now and that was enough.

Draco hesitated at the side of the bed.

Hermione reached out to him and Slowly Draco crawled into bed next to her.

Fear wracked his body.

He was beyond scared he would fuck this up somehow.

She said she needed him, she had asked for him to hold her. But how? What exactly did she want?

 _Just comfort_ , he assured himself, _just to be held nothing else. Think of yourself as a giant pillow._

Hermione shifted over to him and curled into his body resting her head on his chest.

His arms wrapped around her of their own accord and resting on her hair.

"I feel so abandoned," Hermione said after a long moment of silence. Her voice cracked with emotion and Draco felt his stomach muscles contract.

"I'm right here with you," said Draco stroking her hair.

 _I will never abandon you._

"You must think I am really pathetic," she said keeping her head ducked down.

"What?" Her words had him wanting to sit bolt upright, instead Draco shifted and turned on to his side.

"Look at me," he ordered firmly.

Hermione shook her head.

Draco reached down and tucked his hand gently under her chin lifting it so that their eyes met.

"You listen to me Granger and you listen well," he said intently holding her gaze. "You are not pathetic. You are strong and capable and one hell of a woman. Don't let this place and everything that's happened change who you are. Because **_You_** are incredible."

She blinked up at him as if seeing him for the first time.

"You mean that don't you?" she said.

Draco nodded.

"You're the one who made me promise honesty Hermione," he said. "So you can trust every word is true."

Her face squeezed tight again and she tried to control the tears that were threatening to fall

"It's okay," said Draco. "It's okay."

Life wasn't okay-they both knew that- what Draco was really saying was that it was okay to cry, or feel, and so the wand and his promise allowed the words to pass through his lips because of their honest intent.

"Promise me you'll stay with me."

"I promise," answered Draco holding her tighter.

 _Always._

* * *

 **Yes, that choice to end with 'Always' is new as of my edits and updates. I do love Snape so much and I really liked the idea of putting a little parallel between their stories here. Did anyone else cry when Snape said "Always" ? I know I sure did. I hope you like it, if you do please be sure to leave a nice review. Cheers.**


	28. Chapter 26: The Happy Prince

*****Authors note***: IF YOU HAVE NOT READ** **"The Happy Prince" by Oscar Wilde, I highly recommend it. You don't have to read it in order to enjoy this chapter, but you will likely enjoy this chapter more having read it. It is a short story. If you don't feel like reading it and would rather listen to it there is a wonderful reading of it by the great STEPHEN FRY (who is awesome) which can be found on youtube very easily. Like I said, you do not have to read it to understand this chapter, but you will likely enjoy it much, much more.**

* * *

Chapter 26: The Happy Prince

Draco woke slowly to the warmth of Hermione in his arms.

He had never seen anything more beautiful than her laying there with him knowing it was where she wanted to be.

Seeing her sweet, peaceful face next to him because she had asked him to stay was everything to Draco.

He wanted to stay there are just look at her forever.

A moment passed and then another and it felt, for a short time, like he could freeze time and suspend the weight of the world. Yet Draco knew that what goes up must come down and that it was only a matter of time before that weight would come crashing down on them even harder than before.

It would be harder now because she knew.

 _And easier,_ his mind argued.

Easier because she knew and believed now that he cared for her and that he would do everything in his power to keep her safe. Harder because he was so close to what he now knew he loved.

Draco closed his eyes and inhaled the now familiar scent of her.

 _I would be content if time really did freeze and I was trapped here, in this moment, for all eternity,_ Draco thought wistfully.

This was love.

It was the first time he had felt it and been able to treasure it instead of rejecting it.

He had thrown items across the room, wanted to wreck the place, when he had first realized he was in love with her. He had railed against it, wanted to fight it, change it.

Now…lying next to her he wouldn't change it for the world.

Even if it meant more pain in the long run.

Hermione shifted next to him still fully clothed and Draco noted that this was the first time he had ever gone to bed with a woman in his bedroom and held her with no intention of getting anything else.

There had been no ulterior motive, just to be what she needed and asked.

There was something almost sweet and…innocent about it.

Draco let himself enjoy the moment for a while longer before he reluctantly dragged himself out of bed. It was as if every inch of him protested the separation. His skin screamed out for more contact. His heart begged for him to stay.

 _No,_ he told himself, _you need to be what she needs and right now she needs food._

Draco looked out the window at the climbing light and knew that he was a little later getting out of bed than usual.

He padded silently down the steps to his kitchen and hastily threw together a quick breakfast, less worried today about making something fancy and more preoccupied with being able to gather things together quickly enough that no one would see that he was carrying food for more than one mouth upstairs.

Would it really surprise them now? He wondered. Would they care that he was feeding her? She had to eat sometime.

Draco knew there was a different between his family and the deatheaters knowing that she was being fed and seeing Draco bring food to her-especially some of the more intricate meals he had made.

Yes, it was best to fly as far beneath the radar as possible.

He knew that what had happened last night would buy him some time without question or suspicion and he wasn't about to botch that reprieve by becoming careless.

Being up somewhat later that his usual, didn't seem to matter this morning though. Draco had almost forgotten about the fact that there had been a party last night until he had seen the decorations still strewn about his house. There was even one guest sleeping on a chaise, odd considering aparation was an option. He wondered how drunk the man would have had to be in order to just pass out on a chair instead of popping home.

Draco's footsteps slowed as he passed a whirling decoration and looked at the tiny dancers spinning in mid-air held aloft by a spell that had yet to dissipate. For a moment Draco allowed himself to imagine a very different party, one where Hermione had been his guest, not his prisoner. A party where he had been allowed to compliment her on her looks without her wondering if his words were sincere. A party where they could laugh together and both drink champagne and dance until their bodies and minds spun.

They could collapse together all smiles and laughter, and talk about all the trivial drama. A party where he could charm her, make her laugh and kiss her in a way that she wouldn't pull back.

Draco reached a hand towards the tiny dancers and as soon as his fingers brushed their forms they crumbled into dust and sprinkled lightly to the floor vanishing completely.

A part of him regretted reaching out, maybe the spell would have lasted a few minutes more if he hadn't interfered, if he hadn't dared touch and then he could have lived in the fantasy he had been building brick by brick inside his head about him and Hermione.

Draco turned away.

It was silly to wish such things.

He took the stairs and each step upward took him further away from his imaginings.

Even if Voldemort wasn't around Hermione Granger was the last person his family would be alright with him inviting over for any kind of festivities.

They would never accept her.

They would never understand.

And she would never want him to kiss her.

Not really.

* * *

Hermione was still sleeping peacefully when Draco returned to his room.

His thoughts, having turned somewhat sour kept him from looking at her or lingering.

A small piece of him tugged as if to say: 'Go back to her, crawl back in bed and hold her till she wakes.'

But Draco didn't know if Hermione would feel the same this morning as she did last night.

What if she regretted asking him to stay?

What if when she woke she hated him for giving in to her whim last night and sleeping next to her?

Draco didn't want to see her face when she woke if there was anything other than a smile on her lips upon discovering him still there, and since there was a very real chance that she would frown or pull away he eliminated the possibility of seeing her lips turn down by simply not being there at all.

Instead Draco set down the food and went into his wardrobe to check on Fred.

As soon as he stepped inside his oasis he felt the pull of his little ocean calling his name. Draco wanted to dive strait into its warm welcoming water and swim. Swim until his arms grew heavy and his mind went clear from the emersion. Swim until he could just "Be" here in the moment and think of nothing else.

He didn't bother even trying. Draco knew there was something about having someone else in his wardrobe-even if they were in a coma- that made it so he would not find that peace he sought. Something about having a guest that made it so that his secret place didn't quite feel like it was 'his' anymore.

 _It's only temporary,_ he told himself and prayed it was the truth.

Fred was still laying in the same position, his bedding soaked from sweat, when Draco entered the tiny room to check on him

When Draco checked on Fred he found that the fever had broken which gave Draco hope for the Weasely's recovery.

He administered the last healing potion from his old batch of supplies, this time Fred swallowed without the aid of a spell which Draco took to be a very good sign.

Once he was done with Fred Draco went back out to the main room of his hut and sat down on the big reading chair by the fire.

He picked up a book to read and then put it down.

He went over to his bar to pour a drink and then reminded himself that it was too early for that.

Last night was the first party that Draco had been at in his own house without taking advantage of the endless supply of alcohol.

He went outside and sat on his big rock in the sun.

A part of him railed against his own emotions.

He loved Hermione and he had loved waking up next to her.

 _You shouldn't,_ another part of him protested. _When all this is done she will leave and never look back._

The same thoughts circled round and round in Draco's head as he repeatedly tried to talk himself out of being in love with Hermione.

He told himself all kinds of lies: That there was no point. That it was never going to happen, that he wasn't really in love with her it was just lust, obsession or adoration.

Nothing helped.

Nothing he could say to himself could help him escape from the truth:

He was in love with Hermione, plain and simple.

By the end of his time in the oasis he reconciled himself with two things:

One, he was in love with Granger and there was no changing it.

Two, there was no world in which he would be good enough to be with her how he wanted.

It didn't matter that she was leaning on him now-that she had asked him to stay, that was only a temporary phase and he needed to be a better man...like his mother had said he needed to be a great man and set aside his wants and his desires in favour of what Hermione needed.

His wants, his desires could not outrank her needs; he would not allow them to.

Draco told himself that he would have to learn to be okay with that fact and move on-simply carrying the cross of his affection for her.

However, he was Draco Malfoy, and Draco Malfoy wasn't the type to just lay down and give up without a fight...at least not anymore.

She had made him that way.

She had taken what little strength he had inside and magnified it tenfold. So, even though it was futile, a small, subconscious part of his brain began thinking on ways that he could win her heart, while his conscious mind told him there was no way it could be done and that it was stupid to even try.

* * *

"Do you have anything good to read that isn't strictly speaking educational?" Hermione asked when Draco came back from wherever he had been. She hadn't heard the door open or close, but then she had been in the washroom.

"You're up early," he said pointing out the obvious. "And you're asking for something 'fun' to read?" He came over to her and felt her forehead. "Are you sure you're feeling quite alright?"

She slapped his hand away pursing her lips in frustration.

Draco laughed and Hermione froze.

It was a...warm sound.

She wanted her hear it again. He stopped a moment later and she realized how silly she must look just staring at him for laughing. She regained her composure and tried to cover.

"I am allowed to want to read something for fun you know. It's called escapism."

As soon as she said the last word she regretted it because all the light and humor drained out of Draco's face.

"Of course," he said.

"Draco that's not what I meant," Hermione reached out a hand towards him and he side stepped.

"Its fine," he said dismissively and went over to his bookcase and reached up to the top shelf. She watched as his lean form extended to reach. His shirt lifted exposing a line of smooth skin at the base of his spine and the two divots there. Her mouth watered.

 _Ron's back does not look like that._

 _Don't you dare start comparing them_ , she scolded herself.

When Draco turned to face her she was caught by the beauty of his face. Even with the scar above his one eye he was still gorgeous. His chiseled features were focused solely on her.

 _He's perfect._

 _No, he's not perfect he's flawed and dark and..._

 _And he's brave and intelligent and risking everything for you._

 _Even though he thinks I'm just a mudblood._

"What's going on in that bushy haired head of yours?" Draco asked and Hermione's hand went to her hair.

"Why do you always have to make fun of my hair?" she asked, his comment stinging more than she would like especially considering where her head had been at, and especially after last night. Hermione had felt something shift between them last night. She couldn't say exactly what, but something had changed.

Draco looked taken aback.

"I wasn't making fun," he said seriously setting down the boxed set of books. He reached out to her and took a curl in his hand twisting it gently. "I think your hair is wonderful."

"Don't play, Draco," she said upset and then remembered that he couldn't lie to her.

 _He means it?_

 _He thinks my hair is…wonderful?_

"I'm not playing," he said his voice dropping lower. "I love your hair. It makes you stand out."

"Standing out isn't exactly what I want to be doing while here Draco. You and I both know that won't lead to anything good," she said covering for the fact that she suddenly felt very warm and flushed from his words.

"You won't be here forever," he said and his voice lost the soft quality it had a moment before. "Hopefully you'll be free sooner rather than later."

He sounded like he meant it.

 _Of course he means it, he wants this over. He wants you gone._

 _But he's going to go with you._

 _Only out of necessity._

"Are you okay?" Draco's voice cut through her thoughts.

"Fine," she answered automatically.

He frowned slightly and then pushed the Folio boxed set towards her.

"Oscar Wilde?" she asked surprised. She looked up at him. "I didn't know you read muggle authors."

"Yes, well, I don't brag about it and my parents wouldn't approve, but they don't take the time to peruse my shelves all that often since I prefer neither of them come into my room." He shrugged and turned away from her. "It doesn't always stop them from coming in anyways, but the contents of my personal library are hardly on their radar."

"This is a nice set."

"Of course it is," he answered a little haughtily. "Just because I'm reading a muggle author doesn't mean I've lost my sense of class."

"Right," Hermione rolled her eyes. "How could I forget?"

Draco sighed.

"That is not what I meant," he said frowning at her. "You should read him. He is quite good."

"Have you read all of his works?" she asked brightening.

"All except the children's stories," he said running hand through his hair. "I heard they were terribly depressing and so skipped those."

"Oh...I've only read a few, but I haven't read his children's works...I didn't know he wrote for kids."

"Neither did I until I saw them in this set and then promptly bypassed that particular section," Draco rubbed at the back of his neck. "I do have things I have to work on today," he said and created a chain in mid-air.

He held it in his hands for a moment and then passed it off to Hermione.

She accepted it looking at him quizzically.

"I am not going to chain you up," he said. "After last night I don't know if I can ever…" he shook his head. "If someone else comes to the room go to the corner by your pallet to at least pretend you are."

"Okay," Hermione nodded.

"I know you don't want to but-"

"Draco it's okay," she interrupted him. "I understand. You need to keep up appearances and if it looks like I have free rein here people will start to wonder why and question you."

She saw his shoulders relax.

"Thank you for understanding."

Hermione forced a smile.

"Thank you for breakfast."

There was a pause where Draco just looked at her. She could not read his expression. His face hardened and he turned away.

"I'll try and be back for dinner," he said over his shoulder. "But I can't guarantee anything."

"Okay," answered Hermione. "I'll see you when you get back."

Hermione tried to ignore the fact that it hurt he didn't respond.

As soon as Draco had left Hermione sat down and opened one of the books diving in headlong.

* * *

Draco worked the full day in the potion room finishing up several batches of salves and healing droughts that he had been working on since finding Fred. When he had finished he tucked them into a small case and brought them back upstairs. It was well passed dinner time and Draco was surprised that his mother hadn't called them all together for a meal.

It seemed she had been avoiding him as of late and with that avoidance came in the form of a cut to the family dinner. The Dark Lord had, happily, not been around all day and peace would have reigned supreme in the house were it not for the unbelievable tension hanging in the air.

Draco went to the kitchen and found a plate of leftovers waiting for him on the table. He picked it up and a few extra rolls as well as a bottle of wine and he took them up to the room.

Hermione was sitting looking out the window when he came back. She smiled when she saw him and Draco felt the warmth of her smile like a sucker punch to the gut.

"I brought dinner," he said.

"It looks like it's only enough for one."

"I..." he went to lie and tell her that he had eaten already and felt the words stick in his throat.

 _Damn this fucking promise._

"I brought it up to the room so you could eat," he said going for a half truth and placed the meal in front of her.

His mother had been the one who taught him the spell for keeping food warm so it was fresh and ready for her. The smell made Draco's mouth water and the fact that he had skipped lunch made him all the hungrier.

 _She needs it more. She has gone without too much, you can handle a day without food._

Draco had never had to go without and his body protested slightly, his stomach growling. Thankfully Hermione's knife scraped the plate at the same moment and she missed the sound. Draco poured himself a glass of wine and buttered two of the three rolls he had brought up. He began munching on them and then poured Granger a glass of wine. She looked at him sideways.

"What?" he asked.

"You drink wine?"

"Yes," he answered. "Good wine goes with good food. That's a steak, so red wine is in order."

"Oh..." said Hermione looking at her glass.

"Of course one can make the argument that it's more important to have a wine you like then one that is considered the correct or proper pairing, but since I like red wine," he took a swig and the warmth of it went straight to his mostly empty stomach. He felt it run through him and smiled. "That isn't an issue."

"I don't really drink," said Granger.

"Ever the goody two shoes," Draco gibed and he watched her shift uncomfortably.

 _Way to peer pressure her_ , he chastised himself.

"You don't have to drink it if you don't want to Granger. I just thought you might like something nice."

He watched her face change at his words and then her eyes softened and grew warm.

"Thank you," she said and lifted her glass. He clinked glasses with her gently and watched her sip at the wine. She made a slight face as the flavour rolled over her tongue.

"That's..." she hesitated and he saw the second flavor hit and her expression change. "Oh..." she said aloud.

"Now take a bite of the steak," he ordered gently and she complied.

"Oh that's wonderful!" she said through the piece. She took another sip. "It tastes different."

"That the beauty of a good pairing," said Draco with a smile and he took another swig of his own wine.

"How do you know about this stuff?" she asked munching on some of the vegetables.

"I was raised this way Granger," he answered. "Many rules, many privileges, many burdens."

He watched he swallow.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what" asked Draco.

"You've been through so much…"

"Don't go there," his voice was a warning. "I told you I don't want Pity."

"Sorry."

"Granger stop apologizing," he said, but this time a little more gently. "Just enjoy the food and the wine and suffer the company."

"I don't mind your company," she protested quickly and Draco raised an eyebrow. "Well it's better than silence," she amended her cheeks turning pink.

"Well I am glad to hear that I am preferable to being alone."

"I couldn't say that before," she added and took a generous swig of her wine.

"I was a prick," said Draco. "I know."

"Yes," she answered, "You were."

Draco laughed at her hasty response and refilled both their glasses.

"Quick to agree with me on that one," he said wryly.

"Yes, well it's true."

"I know," he said the humor leaving his voice. "I am sorry."

"Draco stop apologizing," she said throwing his line back at him. She giggled slightly.

 _Is it just the wine or is she having a good time?_

 _Does it matter?_ He asked himself. _She's happy, that's what's important._

Draco smiled.

"So tell me about what you read today," said Draco changing the subject.

"You want to know what I read today?" Hermione asked blinking at him.

"Yes, that's why I asked."

"Oh…It's just odd."

"What's odd about it?" asked Draco knowing full well that what was odd was the fact that he was being nice and making pleasant conversation with her-something he had not really ever done before.

"Nothing, you just don't usually talk like that."

"I am capable of holding on a conversation that isn't life or death," said Draco defensively.

"I know that, I've just never been on the receiving end of it."

"Is that a problem?" Draco asked raising an eyebrow. "I can feign indifference if you would prefer."

"So you're not asking just to be polite. You actually want to know?" She said looking at him like he had grown a second head.

"Yes," Draco answered simply, choosing to not be offended at her incredulous tone.

"Oh…okay then. Well," she blushed.

"Well what?"

"I read the children's stories."

"The one section that I cannot discuss with you at length because I haven't read it." Draco rolled his eyes. "How charming."

"I didn't think you'd want to talk to me about it!" protested Granger.

"Well I do, which means you will just have to tell me all about them in detail."

"What about spoilers? Don't you want to just read them yourself?"

"I would rather hear about them from you. And I don't think it counts as spoilers when the stories are decades old."

I supposed you're right. You're sure I wouldn't be spoiling it for you though?"

"I'm certain," Draco said with a nod and another sip of wine.

"Okay, well I read this one called The Happy Prince…" Hermione proceeded to tell Draco all about the story in vivid detail. As she got into the telling her hand began to move along with the words and he felt a tightness in his chest as his heart filled with affection for the child-like wonder she had at the story. It was a sad piece and Draco could only partial understand why she liked it…and yet he found it oddly touching and somehow strangely relatable. But what could he have in common with the happy prince? That boy was just a statue, Draco was living and breathing and yet…sometimes he felt trapped like a statue on display.

Hermione let out a sigh when she was finished and munched on her roll-there was still half the steak on her plate when she put the cutlery on it and pushed it away slightly.

"Aren't you going to finish that?" he asked slightly concerned.

"I can't," she admitted. "I'm stuffed. My stomach isn't used to such a big and rich meal anymore."

Guilt wracked him and she clearly saw it on his face because she reached out to him clasping his hand across the table.

"Draco, please don't feel bad right now, this was a lovely dinner and I am happy you thought of me," her eyes sparkled up at him and if she were anyone else he would have leaned across the table and kissed her right then and there. But it was Granger which meant that he wanted to lean over and kiss her more than anyone else he had ever known, and it also meant that he couldn't.

As much as it pained him he gently extracted his hand from beneath hers and poured them each a final glass, emptying the bottle. By the time they were done Granger was smiling a slightly bleary smile and yawning.

"Let's get you to bed," he said gently. "Before you turn into a pumpkin."

"Okay," she said smiling and she stood up and wobbled. Draco caught her and she laughed and nuzzled into his shoulder. "You smell good," she said and inhaled deeply.

"Thanks," said Draco trying to ignore the sensations her touch was inducing.

"I like you when you're not an asshole," she said and Draco froze. His heart thudded in his chest and his body hardened in response to her words.

"I like you too Granger," he managed. _I love you actually._

"Mmmmmm," she said and he felt her relax into his arms. Without extra thought he lifted her into his arms bridal style. She wrapped her arms around his neck and curled in against his body.

 _Fuck she feels so good._

He carried her over to her pallet and laid her down gently, tucking her in.

"Gniight Draco..." she murmured.

"Goodnight Hermione," he saw her smile faintly before her face relaxed and her breathing evened with sleep.

Draco knelt by her side just watching her for a moment.

 _She is the most beautiful being in this entire world..._

He sighed.

 _How could I not love her?_

With that thought he stood and went to the table. His stomach growled as he looked at the several ounces of steak there waiting. He picked up his second roll and popped the leftovers on his bun and took a bite as he went over to the wardrobe. He had never been one for sharing food, but he was hungry and somehow it didn't bother him to share with Granger.

He picked up the case of potions he had finished earlier that day and went over to this wardrobe. He spared on glance at Hermione before stepping inside.

The moon was humongous in the sky and there was meteor shower shining overhead.

Draco breathed in the fresh air and set down the heavy case of potions. He stripped down and went for a nice long swim, stretching his body to its limits before coming to the shore of the island and towing off. He lifted the potions across the water with a quick spell and they floated over as he re-dressed before going inside.

Draco set the potions down by the wall and opened the door do where he was keeping Fred. It was oddly pitch dark and Draco felt worry take hold of him. Had something happened to the boy? Had he passed away? Draco reached for his wand to illuminate the room and a fist came from the darkness landing squarely on his Jaw.

* * *

 **Aright, hope you enjoyed that chapter and the bit of a change of pace. I would love to know what you thought of the whole thing. Please review. Has anyone else read "The Happy Prince"? Does anyone else love it? Did anyone go and listen to the Stephen Fry reading? Hermione is a book nerd and so am I. I have been waiting to put some literary reference in my story. I hope you enjoyed.**


	29. Chapter 27: The Order

*****AUTHORS NOTE-PLEASE READ: So, I re-did the math and counted it out to make sure I had it right. Hermione has been at the mansion for 14 days as of last chapter and Fred hitting Draco in the jaw. It's a long time but it's also a short time considering how many chapters I have written. I did change the wording in chapter 17 (the sanctuary) from "The last Few weeks" to "The last two weeks" to keep the writing of this fic consistent. I have the days from the orders POV marked out.**

 **Note on Cannon: I am using some lines directly from the book for the first section here, while also adding a little overhead of Ron and blending it with some of the movie. I hope you enjoy my choices overall-I tried to go with what I thought would work.**

 **A big thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter:** Kotodashi Kyoshi, LillsBills, BeYourOwnLivingHistory, alluringmango, mega700201, ElizColl, ChildofBrisingr, tomfeltonswifey, Aid4, NadzKers12, .babe, addictedtoloveandfiction, DramioneAddict88, And guests "D" , "Who" and "Chickensoup" **You are all appreciated.**

 **For once this chapter does not need a trigger warning except for maybe for violence. So without further ramblings… on to the chapter than many of you have been waiting for...time to find out what Ron and Harry have been up to for the last two weeks…**

* * *

Chapter 27: The Order

 **Two Weeks ago:** The Night of the Chandelier

Harry, Ron and the rest of the group hit solid earth and smelled salty air. Harry fell to his knees, relinquished Dobby's hand. Ron landed at a jarring angle letting out a cry.

"Hermione!" Ron yelled still staring out at the spot where she had last been before they had apperated away. "Hermione!" he called out her name again. Desperation pumped through ever fiber of his being. How could they be here without her? How could they have left her behind?

"It's no use Ron," said Harry from behind him. "She can't hear you." Harry attempted to lower Griphook gently to the ground. Griphook merely whimpered. Harry squinted around through the darkness. There seemed to be a cottage a short way away under the wide, starry sky, and he thought he saw movement outside it.

"We have to go back!" cried Ron.

"We will," said Harry. "Dobby, is this shell cottage?" Harry was reeling. He felt in shock. He needed Hermione. "Have we come to the right place Dobby?" he asked trying to focus on the present.

"I don't care if we're in bloody Timbuktu!" cried Ron. "We need to go back there now and get Hermione"

"Dobby, can you go back and get Hermio-" Harry started and then stopped. His eyes landed on Dobby. The little elf stood feet from him. "DOBBY!"

The Elf swayed slightly, stars reflected in his wide shining eyes. Together he and Harry looked down at the silver hilt of the knife protruding from the elf's heaving chest.

"Dobby-no-HELP!" Harry bellowed towards the cottage, towards the people moving there.

He did not know or care if they were wizards or muggles, friends or foes; all he cared about was that a dark stain was spreading across Dobby's front, and that he had stretched out his arms to Harry with a look of supplication. Harry caught him and laid him sideways on the cool grass.

"Dobby, no, don't die, don't die-"

The elf's eyes found him, and his lips trembled with the effort to form words.

"Harry...Pottter..."

"Dobby, hold on," said Harry.

"No, no, no, no," said Ron fisting his hands in his hair.

"Such a beautiful place..." said Dobby, his voice soft. "To be with friends...Dobby is happy to be with his friend...Harry Potter"

There was a silence and Harry bowed his head as the little elf's eyes closed one final time.

Bill and Fleur came from the cottage having heard the yells, but Harry heard nothing but the roar of the ocean in his ears and the pain in his heart.

"We have to go back," Ron said after a moment, pulling Harry from his state of shock.

Harry remained silent.

"We have to go back!" Ron said louder.

"Ron," Luna put a hand on his shoulder. "Harry needs a minute."

"We don't have a minute!" Yelled Ron and he stomped towards Harry. Bill stepped in front of him. "Let go of me!"

"Ron, Harry's friend just died," said Luna.

"And HERMIONE COULD BE DYING AS WE SPEAK."

"Yelling isn't going to help," said Luna.

"NO BUT DOING SOMETHING MIGHT!"

"How do you propose we save her?" asked Harry, not looking away from Dobby's peaceful face. In that moment the elf looked like he was merely sleeping.

"We apperate back!"

"We can't," said Harry. "Dobby was the only one who could apperate past the Malfoy's wards."

There was a silence.

"We have to do something," said Ron, his voice desperate.

"We will Ron," said Bill. "But right now we have to regroup."

"We need to bury him," said Harry, trying to deal with one thing at a time. That was how he would get through this. First take care of Dobby, then make a plan and save his friend. He felt so powerless, at least burring Dobby was something he could do with his own two hands. "I want to do it properly. Not by Magic," he turned to Fleur. "Have you got a Spade?"

* * *

After the last stone had been laid Ron stood looking at the grave. He was upset that the little house elf was dead, but not in the same way that Harry was. He had barely known Dobby. All he knew was the house elf had left Hermione behind.

"We have to go back," Ron said to Harry. "We have to rescue her."

"I heard you the first time Ron. Have you come up with any brilliant ideas for how exactly we can do that?" asked Harry angrily still wiping away the tears from his eyes. He was clearly mad at Ron for asking now, but Ron couldn't bear to wait.

Every second that Hermione was in that house was another second that Bellatrix might be torturing her. Or worse, the dark Lord. Ron knew how much Voldemort hated witches who weren't from pure blood families. Everyone knew that.

"I don't know," Ron answered. "But we have to go back there."

"Yes, we have to," Harry wiped a fresh tear from his eyes. "We need to figure out a damn way in first."

"Well can't we just..."

"No we can't 'Just' Ron!" yelled Harry. "She is trapped there and if we go rushing in it will be the end of the war because WE WILL ALL DIE and so will she."

"At least we will have done something!" Ron yelled back.

"You think I don't want to save her?" Harry gave Ron a shove. "She's my best friend."

"And I'm chopped liver."

"She's never fucking abandoned me!" said Harry anger making his words cruel.

Ron took a swing and Harry ducked so the punch knocked off his glasses without inflicting any real damage.

"That's enough!" came Luna voice from behind them. "Both of you stop it right now." the small group turned and looked at Luna surprised at the volume of her outburst. "Do you think she would want you fighting each other?" she marched up to them. "She would want you working together, to come up with a plan."

"Hermione always came up with the plans," said Ron defeated.

"Well she isn't here now," said Luna her voice returning to its more gentle airy tone. "So we will just have to work together. First things first we should get back to the order and get some help."

She reached out to Harry who looked distraught.

"It's alright Harry," she said hugging him. "It's not your fault and Hermione knows that. You'll get her out of there like you got me out," she said and patted his back gently. "Now come on you two," she stepped back. "Let's go inside."

"We've already alerted the order to the situation," said Bill. "There's going to be a meeting."

* * *

 **13 days ago**

The order came together for a meeting on how and when to rescue Hermione. There were so many variables nothing could be decided except that they needed to figure out a way to get into the mansion and past the wards.

Mad-eye said he could figure out a way past the wards, it wouldn't take him long. They could waste time blasting at them, but then loose the chance of surprise. He wanted to see if he could create door that they could all walk through without setting off any alarms. The meeting was adjured and Ron and Harry both hated the fact that they would have to wait to save their friend.

* * *

 **9 Days ago**

"It's been five fucking days!" said Ron to the group of people gathered round at a meeting of the order. "If it was Harry you all would have already done something to save him."

Silence fell around the room because as much as anyone hated to admit it they knew it was true. Harry was the key to winning the war. Everyone had been thinking that for so long that he was THE absolute priority. Everyone else was important, true, but not in the same way-not worth the same risk in the eyes of the order.

"Listen." Harry piped up. "We need to come up with a plan to go rescue her. We should have come up with one already."

"We are trying Harry," said Remus, but it's not that simple the Malfoy Mansion is one of the ancient homes, it has quite a few wards of its own not to mention the number of death eaters who are there on any given day, and sources say that the Dark Lord is living there at least part of the time as well."

"All the more reason for us to get her out of there!" said Ron. "Do you hear what you are saying? She is literally in the middle of enemy territory."

"Exactly," said Remus. "The middle of enemy territory we can't just go rushing in to a trap."

"Who says it's going to be a trap?!" asked Ron abandoning logic.

"Ronald you know it is," said Ginny.

"Nobody asked you," he shot back.

"She's my friend too," said Ginny.

"Enough," said Mad-eye "We will figure out a way, we just need time. I've got a door built, I figured out the magic for that but we still have to figure out a good time when that place won't be crawling with Death eaters. We need the odds to be in our favour"

"She might not have time," protested Ron.

"She might not even be still alive." said Tonks and everyone turned to look at her. "I know you don't want to hear it and believe me I don't want it to be true as much as everyone else," Tonks said looking for Remus first and then to Harry and Ron "She's a lovely girl but chances are she's already dead."

"YOU SHUT UP!" yelled Ron standing and pulling his wand.

"Ronald Weasely," Mrs. Weasely called out. "You put away your wand this instant."

Ron seemed to realize what he was doing and looked at his wand and then the rest of the table and then turned and left the room.

* * *

"You alright little brother?" asked George from the top of the stairs.

"We heard it didn't go well in there," said Fred.

"And why weren't you at the meeting?" demanded Ron.

"Easy now," said Fred.

"We were listening," said George.

"We have extra ears to spare said Fred and the two high-fived each other.

"Make fun," said Ron. "While you do Hermione is sitting somewhere in a dungeon being tortured."

The twins turned serious.

"We weren't making fun Ron," said George.

"We love Hermione too," added Fred. "She's practically a sister."

"Stays with us often enough," added George. "Mum's practically adopted her."

"Always wanted another daughter," said Fred.

"Well at least you two care," said Ron. "Not that it helps any."

"Ouch," said George and got up and walked back to the room they were staying in. Fred looked down at Ron. "Keep spirits eh Ron. We'll get her out of there. I'll go with. I promise. Family first," he said with a small smile and then followed his twin back into their room.

* * *

 **8 days ago**

The photograph was delivered by owl to Harry. When he opened it up he dropped the picture as soon as he saw it and stumbled backwards.

"What is it Harry?" asked Ginny and she knelt down to pick up the photo.

"Don't..." he warned but it was too late.

Ginny screamed and dropped the photo as well turning into Harry and burying her face in his chest. She burst into tears for her friend and what she had seen. People came running at the sound of her scream and Harry stood there in shock unable to do anything other than comfort his crying girlfriend.

"What is it?" asked Mrs. Weasely. What's wrong?"

Mad-eye, who had been eating one of Mrs. Weasely's pies at the table, picked up the photograph and looked at it making a sound of disgust, he tucked it into his pocket.

"I take it you two saw?" said Mad-eye

Harry nodded mutely.

"Well no one else needs to," he said in a grumble. "'Cept perhaps some of the order. Maybe this will light a fire under their asses." with that he hobbled out of the room.

"What is it Ginny?" asked Mrs. Weasely. Ginny turned away from Harry and went into her mother's arms. Ginny, didn't say anything, only let out a sob in reply.

"It was Hermoine," said Harry finally managing to find his voice.

"She's alive, oh thank Merlin," said Mrs. Weasely letting out a sigh of relief.

"They tortured her," Ginny wailed into her mother's chest and Mrs. Weasely's eyes came up quickly and met Harry's.

The colour that had drained from Harry's face at seeing the photograph began returning to his face as shock gave way to pure anger.

"They sent a photo," said Harry, "of Draco Malfoy holding up a Hermione so bloody and battered she couldn't stand on her own," and with that Harry turned to walk out of the room only to see Ron staring at him in horror from the door frame.

Ron turned and began running up the stairs.

"Ron!" Harry called after him and followed Ron up to his room where he found Ron packing things into a bag horridly.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to kill Malfoy," said Ron. "But first I'm going to make him fucking wish he had never been born."

"You can't just go on your own."

"I'm not waiting here while they torture her to death!"

"I'll go with you, just wait...The order."

"Fuck the order. Fuck you! We should have gone back as soon as we realized she wasn't with us. We never should have left without her!"

"I know, God Ron I know but if you go storming in right now like this they'll kill you."

"I don't care."

"And what about your mom and your family. Do you think they would care if you kicked the bucket rushing in recklessly?"

"Don't you bring them into this, just because you don't have a family to care doesn't mean you can use mine against me."

The words hung in the air.

Pain lanced through Harry.

"You're right," said Harry. "I've already lost everyone who was my family. My parents Serious. All I have left is you and Hermione and Ginny."

"You leave my sister out of this."

"I love her."

"And I love Hermione," Yelled Ron.

"So do I!" Harry yelled back.

"Not the same way."

"I love her like you love Ginny,"

Harry's words took some of the fire out of Ron and he collapsed sitting on his bed.

"She's all alone there," Ron said woefully.

"We will get her out Ron," said Harry. "I promise."

* * *

 **7 days ago**

"You nervous George?" asked Fred as the twins gathered supplies together in their room. Tonight was the night that they were to go with Harry and Ron and the rest of the order to go rescue Hermione.

"Only for them," said Fred with a false bravado.

"Yeah," said George. "I'm nervous too."

"It will be alright though won't it?" said Fred.

"Sure Fred," said George with a sad smile. He patted his twin on the back. "It'll all be fine. You'll see."

* * *

The chaos of the battle didn't happen until everyone was in the mansion. It had been easy to get to the mansion, too easy. The trap was lying in wait. Clearly they had tripped a silent alarm crossing over the barrier and into the Malfoy estate because there were dozens of Death eaters waiting for them when they arrived and more kept apperating in by the minute.

In the chaos and the screams Fred and George were separated.

"Where is she?" Harry demanded of a death eater at wand point. Harry's voice confirmed for Fred that it wasn't his brother Ron standing only a few feet away. The order had told Harry he couldn't go and so Harry had taken a polyjuice potion to look like Ron and come along with them anyways.

Both twins knew, but that was because the twins liked to listen in and keep an ear on things. Neither one of them were about to hold Harry back from coming to rescue Hermione. Chosen one or not they knew what it meant when 'family' was on the line.

"Where is she?" demanded the real Ron to another death eater before punching him out.

Seeing a second Ron distracted Fred for a mere moment, but that moment was enough. A hex hit Fred sending him backwards. In the chaos Ron and Harry, though so near, did not see him fall to the ground.

"She's not here," said Harry. "She's not here Ron."

"Then where the hell is she?"

"I don't know."

"We have to go," said Remus. "Everyone fall back".

Spells and hexes flew through the air as the order began to retreat one by one.

Fred tried to recover, but as he staggered a second hex caught Fred on the back sending him flying. He crashed up against the wall and looked up just in time to see a magical axe come down at his face.

Then there was only black.

* * *

"Where is Fred?" asked Mrs. Weasely. "Has anyone seen Fred?"

"We were separated in the battle," answered George. "But he was doing fine last I saw."

"Maybe he went somewhere else?" offered Ginny hopefully.

Then Mad-eye came into the room and his face, scarred and mangled said it all.

"Where is my boy?" asked Mrs. Weasely her voice raising an octave. "Where is he? Where is Fred?!"

"I'm sorry Mrs. Weasely." Said Remus

"NO!" she yelled. "No, it's not possible!"

"No," George shook his head. "He's fine. He has to be fine. He's my other half. I would know." George's voice cracked "I would know if he was dead."

"Fred!" Mrs. Weasely wailed. "My boy!" There was no consoling her.

There was no consoling any of them.

The loss was too great.

* * *

 **5 Days ago**

The funeral was held without a body, because Fred's body like several others that had been lost that night, was nowhere to be found. They had the funeral for all the members at once.

Ron's face was a pale like Harry had never seen before.

"I'm sorry for your loss Ron," said Luna softly and she handed him a cup of water. "You too Harry," she said.

"Thanks Luna," said Harry.

Ron said nothing only glared at Luna. Luna turned away and walked out of the room.

"She was only trying to be nice," said Harry to Ron.

"Nice doesn't make anything better," said Ron and he tossed the glass of water away and walked back to the house they were staying in. Harry followed.

"Is there anything I can do?" Harry asked.

"No," snapped Ron.

"Alright," Harry said. "Should I go then?"

"Yes..No." said Ron. "No, stay."

Harry sat across the table from his friend.

"I can't help but feel like it's my fault," said Ron. "I'm the one who pushed everyone to go rescue her and now my brother is dead and it didn't solve anything."

"You couldn't know that she wasn't there. None of us could."

"Harry, they need you outside," came Ginny's voice from the door. Her eyes were red and swollen from crying.

"I'll be right there," answered Harry and he turned back to Ron. "You gunna be okay mate?"

"Yeah," said Ron. "Sure."

Harry left not knowing that his words sparked a change of thought in Ron's mind.

 _You couldn't have known that she wasn't going to be there._

 _She wasn't there_

 _Fred died for nothing_

 _If it weren't for Hermione Fred would still be alive._

In that moment, with that thought, what feelings Ron had for Hermione were twisted into something less than the light he had spoken of in the woods before their capture. It wasn't logical and a part of him knew it was wrong, but that didn't change that a piece of Ron blamed Hermione for his bother's death.

* * *

 **4 days ago**

Ron needed someone to talk to. Someone who wouldn't judge him for being mad at Hermione for the fact that Fred was dead. He knew no one else would understand.

So he turned to the only person he knew adored him without restriction.

He sent an owl to Lavender Brown.

She sent one back the same day.

Then they talked through the fire place even though you weren't 'supposed' to be able to do it. Ron knew from Harry that the one in Gryffindor tower was secretly accessible. That was how Harry and Serious had talked after all.

Ron talked with her about his loss and his pain

And Lavender listened, because her feeling for him hadn't ever really died.

She agreed with him that it wasn't his fault and while she never once spoke badly of Hermione she still let him lay the blame where he liked and didn't argue or judge.

They talked the next day.

And the Next

When Ginny asked what he was doing and how he could betray Hermione like that when they were supposed to be together Ron told his sister to mind her own business and a rift grew between the siblings, which created some distance between Harry and Ron too.

That only made Ron turn to Lavender all the more.

Because she understood.

She was the only one who understood.

Ron still wanted to rescue Hermione because she was his friend, because it was the right thing to do. Because a piece of him was still in love with her, but as Lavender and he talked, that piece grew smaller. How could he love someone who, whenever he looked at or thought of her, all he could see was the fact that his brother was gone?

* * *

 **12 hours ago**

Fred blinked away with a groan and reached for his aching eye.

He felt the patch of disfigured skin and blinked his one eye realizing that was all he had left.

Memories came rushing back including the last one.

 _Am I dead?_ He wondered and looked around.

The room he was in was sparse to say the least.

Fred looked around and sat up in bed. His back cracked in several places and he groaned. He sat up. Blood rushed to his head and he passed out falling backwards on the bed.

* * *

 **7 Hours ago**

Fred woke again. This time he sat up slowly and gave his body time to adjust. He drank the water by the bedside table. And then shuffled out of bed glancing down at his bandages. Someone had been taking care of him. But who? There were no windows in the room and Fred got the distinct impression that he was not a 'guest'

He went to the only door and tried to open it. It didn't so much as budge.

"Shit," said Fred and ran a hand through his red hair. "Hello?" he called out. There was no answer. "Is anyone there?"

No response. He banged on the door.

He called out. He yelled till he was horse and then his legs began to feel wobbly again. He went back over to the bed and realized that the glass of water had re-filled itself. He drank down the contents a second time and lay down waiting as hours passed by.

It seemed like a day passed, maybe more and the silence was beginning to get to Fred who was very used to constant chaos and noise.

* * *

 **2 Minutes ago.**

Finally he heard someone coming and he tucked the light under the covers letting his eyes adjust.

If he was a captive of the Dark Lord he wouldn't go down without a fight and he wasn't about to let them torture him for information.

The door opened and there stood Draco Malfoy-the boy who had hurt Hermione.

Fred didn't think he just let his arm fly catching Draco across the face.

The blond boy took the punch shaking his head on contact. Fred went to punch again but this time Draco responded his arm snapping back out. He caught Fred across the Jaw and once again the world went black.

* * *

 **And there you are. You are all caught up on what has been going on with the boys and the order. I didn't want to villainize Ron. I know a lot of people do that in Dramione fiction, but I do actually like Ron's character for the most part-I just hate him for Hermione. In this fic, it takes him thinking that she is the reason his brother is dead to turn away from the supposed feelings that he had begun to have for Hermione. (No shade thought, there are many Dramione fics that I do like where Ron is an ass-some people write it really well)**

 **I know this chapter doesn't have much in the way of Draco and Hermione, if you want to read a little fluff about them I have started another little fanfiction of one shots and cute fluff and smut writing alternative endings and scenarios specifically from this story. It's called "Dreams and Love scenes" I will be updating it sporadically, but just thought I would let you know that is there in case you need your weekly dose of them.**

 **Would love to know what you thought of this chapter. Back to Draco and Hermione next update. Look forward to hearing from you all. Cheers.**


	30. Chapter 28: The Dragon

**Okay, so we are now all caught up on the boys and we can get back to the whole Draco and Hermione and their budding romance.**

 **Thank you to everyone who took the time to comment on the last chapter even though it wasn't about our two lovely ones. I appreciate you all:** tomfeltonswifey, Kotodashi Kyoshi, cmtaylor531, RotcehM, Amblure100p, .babe, mega700201, BeYourOwnLivingHistory, addictedtoloveandfiction , Scorpia11 , Dauntless10 **and guest's** "Who" and "D"

 **This Chapter is dedicated to** Aid4 **"Thank YOU" for sticking around, for always taking the time to review and for being just generally awesome. I appreciate you so much, you actually have no idea. I sincerely hope you enjoy this chapter.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 25: The Dragon

Draco rubbed his face where Fred's punch had landed. It hadn't hurt much as there wasn't a whole lot of physical strength behind the blow. However there was a lot of passion behind it to be sure. The redhead had clearly known WHO he was punching.

 _Fucking pratt_ , Draco thought.

 _He thinks you hurt Hermione…_

 _You did hurt her._

Draco looked down at Fred's unconscious form and then pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes.

"Don't kill the Weasel," he told himself out loud and went over to Fred. With his wand he lifted Fred and put him back on the bed. Then he cast some bindings to hold the redhead in place so that when he woke up they could talk.

In the meantime he set out several of the healing potions he had created to help Fred and then went back out into his main room to put the remainder of the potions in the secret compartment in his bar.

He heard the yells from the other room a few moments later and made his way back in.

"You bastard. I'm going to kill you. Where is she? Is she still alive?"

Draco went back into the room to face the redhead.

"I won't say a word you can torture me all you like but I won't fucking say a word," said Fred.

"Silencio," Draco cast and Fred's voice fell silent. "You've said a number of words already," said Draco and he pulled up a chair and sat down.

"Listen," said Draco. "I am only going to tell you all this once. I am going to spell out and give you an idea of the total mess that we are both in. Then I am going to tell you how you are going to help me and Hermione," Draco paused and Fred sat looking at him. "When I am done you get to ask your questions and I'll answer them and then give you another drought of healing serum and get back to my room and Hermione."

Fred turned red and Draco could see the mouthing of something vicious.

"It's not like that," said Draco with a growl. "Cram your judgment for a second and listen okay?"

Draco watched Fred snap his trap shut and glare at him

 _Stubborn arse._

 _You'd be obstinate too if you were tied up in a dark room with no windows with someone you thought had hurt Hermione._

 _I'd kill for her._

 _He died for her,_ Draco reminded himself and took a deep calming breath.

"Hermione is fine," said Draco. "She is up in my room, and before you start getting any ideas I have not touched or used her." He let that sink in. "You can tell her that yourself when I am sure that you are well enough to leave this place." Draco sighed. "She got left behind..."

Draco proceeded to tell the cliff notes version of what had happened, leaving out the times that Hermione had been attacked, not because he was worried about Fred being upset with him, but because he knew Granger wouldn't want him to go blabbing about those moments.

Draco knew Hermione cared about what others or more specifically what her friends thought of her and she would appreciate his discretion. If need be she would tell who she wanted to about it, but Draco got the feeling that Fred was not among those she would sit down with for a heart to heart about the times she had almost been raped.

"The Dark Lord doesn't know about any of this," finished Draco. "He thinks that I am using Granger as my sexual play thing and my personal entertainment for daily torture." He looked at Fred "She thinks you're dead and blames herself for that fact." Draco's shoulder rose and fell with a deep breath. "I didn't let her know that you were alive because you were completely unconscious and on deaths door step. I didn't want her to go through loosing you twice and have to carry that."

He saw Fred's face change as he processed that last bit of information.

"It's too dangerous to send word out in an owl and all the fireplaces are locked so your family likely thinks you're dead still too," Draco rubbed his face. "I thought you were dead until I saw your chest rise and checked for a pulse," Draco swallowed. "I'm not a healer, and I did as best I could, but I couldn't save your eye. I don't know if anyone actually could. It was pretty bad."

Fred looked down towards his lap.

"With all that said," Draco continued. "When you're fit enough to travel I need you to leave this place and tell your friends when and where to attack and that when they come in they are to take both Hermione…and myself."

Fred raised an eyebrow.

"It's the only way that I can get away from this place without the Dark Lord killing my parents." Draco felt oddly shaky talking so openly and for such a length to Fred.

Draco didn't talk to people like this.

He didn't open up like this.

He was speaking to Fred…

Because of Hermione.

He would only do something like this for Hermione.

 _Because you love her..._

Draco paused.

"I'm going to let you speak now. Alright?"

Fred nodded and Draco removed the spell.

"What makes you think I am going to believe you?" said Fred a little more calmly than Draco was expecting.

"What reason do I have to lie?"

"I don't know," said Fred sarcastically. "You're evil, your family is evil, you dad helped bring back the dark Lord, you're a deatheater, you're a Slytherin and you've always hated Hermione," Fred listed each item as if counting.

Draco took a deep breath and blew it out through his nose with a rumble.

"I will only argue the last point"

"Oh really?"

"I have not always hated Hermione."

Fred gave him a look and raised an eyebrow.

"I haven't" Draco protested "There were moments that I hated her," _for the lash of my father's cane, for the pain_ … "Before she ended up here I was hoping that she was off somewhere safe."

"Sure you were," said Fred rolling his one good eye.

"Alright fine," said Draco, "Don't believe me." he shook his head. "I don't know why I risked my life for your scrawny ass." Draco stood. "I'll check on you tomorrow. If I'm sure you're fine then...I'll make sure you and Hermione can see each other."

"I want to see her now."

"Tough," said Draco. "You punched me in the fucking face and then fainted. I am not putting her through loosing you twice."

Something in the anger of Draco's voice seemed to cause Fred to pause.

"Fine," said Fred. "But can you get me something to eat? I'm famished."

"What am I your servant?" Draco scoffed.

Fred leaned his head back.

"Oh, no," he said dramatically. "I feel faint. Without food my desire to live grows dimmer by the second."

"Oh shut up you Weasel."

"Give me something to put in my mouth and I might," said Fred and winked the one eye he had.

Draco almost laughed.

"Alright fine," he said, hiding the smile that was pulling at the corner of his mouth. "I'll see what I can do."

Draco closed the door to the hidden room of his oasis and went over to the far wall. He needed to make a link to be able to get food without having to constantly go down to the pantry and refrigerator downstairs. Sneaking the odd item up for Hermione was one thing, people half expected him to feed her, but to get the amount of food he would need for two people without drawing attention was an unreasonable task.

Making a link between his cellar/pantry and the oasis would serve his purposes, he would be able to feed Fred and...he could get food to Hermione multiple times per day without having to go downstairs. It was a perfect solution and he berated himself for not coming up with it sooner.

He went over to the wall and made a second door like he had for Fred's room only this time he did not bother to create an extra space. When he opened the door there was only wall behind it.

 _Now what?_ he asked himself.

He had used the vanishing cabinets and repaired it himself, but this was different. He needed it to act like a gateway the same only this time it involved making the magic himself. He did not know how to make that happen.

He remembered the spell to repair the cabinet: Harmonia Nectere Passus,

 _Maybe if you had a piece of the cabinet you could..._

No, Draco did not want anything to do with that cabinet. He did not need a reminder of what he had done and how he had betrayed…Draco frowned. It was the first time while thinking of that memory that he felt as if he had betrayed anyone. Before he had only felt guilt at not doing what he knew was right…now the feelings were more acute; more solid.

"Fuck, I don't need this," he grumbled. He really didn't need more to feel bad about so he pushed those feelings down deep and focused on the blank wall.

All he wanted was a direct link to the two places. But how?

 _Put it on the list of things you need to do,_ he told himself.

 _If you can figure out a way to link two places in the house, then you can make it so that if Hermione ever gets put back in the cellar she has a way out._

 _A way out into my Oasis. That would mean showing her…letting her in._

He never wanted her to ever have to set foot back in the cellar, but if he got hurt again there was a chance that his mother or one of the other Deatheater's would relegate her back there. At least he could make it so he could protect her even then.

 _You would have to let her in_ , his mind reiterated and he pushed that thought away as well. He wasn't ready to let her in like that. No one was allowed in his space.

Draco paused remembering something: Goyle had doors in his house that with an extra tap of the wand went to different rooms.

Goyle had called them secret passageways when they were children. They had played with them all the time as kids-hide and seek for hours.

All he had to do was ask Goyle's parents if they knew what kind of magic was used in making them.

A small smile had the audacity to break across Draco's face as he felt the relief of having a solution to at least one problem.

* * *

Draco sat by the fireplace in the library with the door locked. He had sent an owl to Goyle two hours prior asking to talk. He could have just apperated over but he didn't want to leave Hermione alone in his house at all if possible.

The fireplace came to life Goyle's head appeared in the flames. He didn't look happy.

"Why the fuck are you asking me for help?" Goyle demanded.

"Because we're friend and typically that's what they do," said Draco. "Who pissed on your porridge?"

"Friends huh?" said Goyle. "Friends like you were with Vincent before you fucking squealed on him and handed him over to the Dark Lord."

"I didn't..." Draco started.

"Yeah, you fucking did. I heard all about it."

"From who?"

"A reliable source."

"Greyback, he's a werewolf."

"No," Goyle shook his head. "Your aunt."

Draco's blood went cold.

"She was bragging about it," Goyle continued. "Saying how the Mudblood got away from Crabbe, but never from you."

Draco had nothing he could say.

"I overheard her bragging about it and how you, poor thing suffered under the Dark Lords wand until you gave up 'the worm' –Crabbe, as the real traitor."

"I didn't want to," Draco managed.

"Well you did. You turned on him and you'll turn on me. That's what people like you do. I can't believe what you said at the party knowing it was your fault Crabbe is dead. You're a monster. I've got nothing left to say to you."

The fire went out leaving Draco feeling cold in more ways than one.

He had lost both his friends in a matter of a few days, one at the hands of the Dark Lord and one because he had turned over a friend.

 _"You're a monster"_

The words echoed in Draco's head

 _He's right._

Draco moved through the library and out to the kitchen. He prepped food in a daze and brought it back up to his room.

Hermione was there waiting for him.

"Why do you have three plates?" she asked looking at him. "Are we expecting someone else?"

Draco froze her words snapping him out of his Daze. He looked over at the floating tray which carried three meals and three drinks. He had been so out of it he didn't realize he had brought three meals with him.

 _You idiot! Anyone walking through the house could have seen that-you're lucky it was only Hermione who noticed._

"Draco?"

"I'm sorry..." he said shaking his head and he sidestepped her question."I...just finished talking with Goyle."

"What happened?" the concern in her voice was overwhelming.

"He...blames me for what happened to Crabbe," Draco blurted.

"Oh Draco," she put her arms around him and Draco just leaned into her for a moment. "It's not your fault what happened to him."

"I know," he answered, his words muffled by her clothes. "But at the same time, it is."

She squeezed him tighter.

"Come on, we should eat," she said. "It might make you feel better."

"I'm not hungry," he said shaking his head.

"Well I could use the company," she said tugging at him. "Won't you at least sit with me?"

He could tell that she was just trying to make it better. The effort alone on her part made it better. He looked at her and was overwhelmed for a moment imagining what it would be like to actually 'be' with someone like her. To come home to, to share a life with, someone who cared so deeply and lived with such passion.

"Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you," he said, letting the true depth of his appreciation come through in his tone.

"For what?" she asked genuinely puzzled.

"For not looking at me like I'm a monster."

"You're not a monster Draco," she came over to him and touched his face. Draco leaned into that touch like it was a life raft.

 _I love you,_ he thought the words at her. He wanted to say them out loud.

"You're an incredible person Granger," he said instead. "You look for the best in people. You bring out the best in people."

She smiled a little.

"When this is all over..." he said "I'll understand if you never want to see me again."

Her face dropped suddenly.

"Why would you say that?" she asked upset.

"Because I'd understand if you didn't want to see the face of the man who held you captive and tortured you."

"The face of the man who did everything in his power to save me!"

"I'm not the hero in this scenario Granger. Just because you don't see me as a monster doesn't mean I'm good."

"You listen here Draco Malfoy," she said firmly. "You have good in you. It's just never been given a chance to grow!"

"It's not your responsibility to help me."

"I know that," Hermione protested. "But I want the job anyways."

"I'm not some pity case for you to take on and try and save."

"I know!"

"Then why do you want to help me?"

"Because I care about you Draco! goddammit, can't you see that?! I care what happens to you. It terrifies me the thought that when all this is over I might lose you."

"Lose me?" Draco almost stumbled.

 _She's afraid of losing me?_

She couldn't mean that.

"Yes," she said emphatically. "I'm afraid when all this is done that you'll just lock yourself away and refuse to see me," he heard her voice break. "I'm afraid that I'll have to carry this on my own and pretend to all my friends like everything is okay and that I'm fine when the only person who understands is here in this room with me right now."

Her words hung in the air and Draco took a moment to process them.

"I don't know what to say," he asked.

"Say that you won't vanish on me. I want you to stay in my life. I don't want to lose you," she almost choked.

"Okay."

"Okay?" she seemed surprised at his agreement.

He nodded mutely, reeling from what had just happened. He tried to reconcile what he had just heard with the reality he was living in. She couldn't mean what she was saying. There was no way. It had to be stress. There was no other explanation.

 _Or maybe she means it_ , he thought.

 _Right, because you'll totally be able to handle seeing hereafter all this is done; watching as she goes back into Ron's arms and has with him everything you wish you had with her,_ the darker side of his mind said sarcastically.

 _If it's what she needs…_ He answered back

Hermione wrapped her arms around Draco distracting him from his thoughts. Draco just stood motionless for a moment, arms hanging limply by his sides for several seconds before they came up to wrap around her.

 _I love you_

 _I never want to lose you either._

He made the decision in his mind that if she needed him, even if it meant torturing himself and standing by while she lived happily ever after with the weasel, he would be there.

At the same time he wouldn't hold her to what she said now. She probably wasn't thinking straight. When all this was over she might want to see him at first, but then he knew it was likely she would want to forget and move. Once she had healed and gotten over all this she wouldn't want to see him anymore, wouldn't want the reminder. He wouldn't blame her, and he wouldn't hold her back.

* * *

After lovely dinner of companionable conversation and even a little laughter Hermione yawned and turned in for the night. When he was sure Hermione was fully asleep Draco went back into the wardrobe to see Fred.

"How are you feeling?"

"Hungry," the twin answered. "Took you long enough. What did you go kill the cow yourself?"

"No," said Draco Flatly, "And its pasta," he added setting down the tray on the bedside table. "If I let you out of those bonds I want your word you aren't going to try and attack me."

Fred shrugged.

"Your word."

"Fine, what word would you like? Flamingo? Prankster? Aphrodite? I'm not sure the last one could be called 'Mine' per-say."

"I'm not in the mood to play right now Weasel," said Draco. He had a bit of a headache from keeping his calm after the conversation that he and Hermione had, had before dinner and it did not bode well for his levels of patience.

"Do you mind not calling me that?" Fed asked with just a hint of vulnerability which vanished immediately as he puffed out his chest. "I'm more of a fox don't you know. Red hair, clever, dashingly handsome."

"Have you looked in the mirror recently?" Draco lashed out and then immediately regretted it. How could he be so cruel as to point out such a giant flaw to someone who had to hate that he was now scarred for life?

 _You're a real bastard sometimes Malfoy._

"Ah, character," said Fred with a smile. "Women love a man with a character ridden face. This is a war wound," he lifted his chin and Draco saw only a hint of sadness hidden behind the jovial expression. "It will be a great story to tell and I am sure there are those around who would find it dashing. Besides," Fred smiled for real this time. "I'm thinking of having a black eye patch. I can walk around looking like a dashing pirate."

Draco realized that Fed was both playing and being serious. The redhead wasn't about to let missing an eye drag him down.

 _You wouldn't be able to handle being maimed like that, look at how much having that scar over your eye has affected you. You'd be ruined if you looked like Fred._

 _Just another reason you don't deserve her, you're too damn shallow for her._

"I brought you food," said Draco stating the obvious because he had nothing else he could think of that was appropriate to say out loud. He waved his wand undoing Fred's bonds.

"I can see that," Fred tapped his one remaining eye. "This one still works."

"Thankfully."

"Yes, thankfully," said Fred a little more seriously and he dug into the meal.

"Careful don't eat too fast. I don't want you getting sick everywhere."

"Since when did you become motherly Malfoy?" said Fred raising an eyebrow.

"Shut up and eat."

"Sure," Fred ate for a few moments in silence twirling his pasta around his fork.

Draco pulled out several vials of potions setting them out one by one of the side table.

Fred looked at the potions pointedly.

"Those for me?"

"Yes," Draco said nodding.

"Any of them turn me into a toad or other creature?"

"No," Draco shook his head.

"Invisible?"

"No."

"Give me special powers?"

"No."

"Any of them poison?"

"Merlin's beard. No, they're just healing potions."

"Boring," said Fred.

"What?" asked Draco.

"You've got to get more creative with your potions there oh blond one."

"Why?" asked Draco crossing his arms over his chest. "Healing is the only thing you actually need, it's the only practical thing."

"Ah," Fred took another bite. "Got to get me healthy before the torture begins. Eh six fingered man?"

"What?" asked Draco not getting the princess Bride reference since, as a pure blood wizard, he didn't watch much in the way of television. "I'm not going to torture you and no one else is either unless you do something stupid and get yourself caught. Right now I am the only person in the world who knows you're alive."

"Nothing, muggle movie reference, obviously not your cuppa tea" Fred set aside the food and took a deep breath. Draco was reminded of the fact that Fred's father worked studying muggles. Fred and the Weasely's had more in common with Hermione than he ever would. At least they understood the world that she came from.

"So my family thinks I'm dead too?" Fred said changing gears completely.

The quiet of the room was his only answer.

"Well that's shitty," Fred wiped his hands on a napkin and took a drink of the water Draco had brought. "Hand me one of those potions will you?"

Draco handed over a vial and Fred took it down in one swig and then made a face.

"That tastes like cat vomit."

"Well it's not meant to taste good, I'm meant to help you."

"Ever heard of putting a spoon full of sugar to help the medicine go down?"

"No."

"Of course you haven't" Fred took another sip of water and smacked his lips together. "Well if it's all the same to you, I'm going to wait a bit before I finish this meal. I feel quite full already."

"Do what you like, I don't care," said Draco getting up.

"Can I see her tomorrow?" Fred's voice had just a hint of pleading in it.

Draco didn't bother to pretend he didn't know what Fred was asking.

"Yeah, if you're doing this well you can see her tomorrow," he took a breath. "Wait a while for the second potion, drink it right before you go to sleep, it will knock you out cold. Drink the other when you wake up and I'll try and find a good time to come get you."

"Where am I anyways?" asked Fred.

"You're in the Malfoy Mannor."

"Doesn't feel like it."

"Well you are," _you just happen to be inside my oasis in my wardrobe in the family manor,_ thought Draco wryly. He went to the door.

"I'm trying to decide if I believe you," Fred called out after him. Draco didn't bother to reply. He silently prayed the redhead would.

* * *

Hermione was standing on the edge of a cliff. The stars were so bright they seemed to light up the sky. A gentle breeze rustled her hair.

"Hey," came a voice from behind her. She turned to see Draco in a white shirt, opened necked and long sleeved. He looked like something out of a romance novel.

"Oh..." she said and looked down at herself to see she was wearing an extravagant gown herself.

"What are you doing out here this late at night?" he asked coming closer.

"Waiting for you," she answered.

"Oh really?" he smiled and she could see the mischief in his eyes. She liked that they were clear and bright, not so haunted as they had been recently.

"Yes really," she answered and reached a hand out for him. She pulled him in close and he looked down at her. She felt her heart beat pound in her chest as he slowly bent his head down to her and brushed his lips over hers.

Suddenly it was daytime and there was a great black Dragon. Draco was away from her arms and fighting the dragon alongside Harry. The two of them came at the Dragon, Draco with a sword and Harry with a Spear. The black Dragon blew fire and Draco lifted his shield protecting both himself and Harry.

As soon as the fire ceased Harry came out from behind the shield and threw his spear at the dragon. It hit the dragon's heart and the massive black Dragon let out a roar and fell to the ground with a thunderous fall that shook the earth. Black smoke seeped into the sky while its black blood oozed out over the landscape turning every plant in its path to ash.

Hermione ran over to Harry and hugged him. He hugged her back and then she turned to Draco and saw that his arm was burned. He cradled it gingerly. Hermione went to help Draco and tend to it. Harry pushed her aside and pointed his wand at Draco.

"No," cried Hermione standing in front of Draco. "Don't you see? He just helped you."

"Get out of the way Hermione," said Harry.

"No, not until you listen."

"He's just like HIM," said Harry pointing to the dead body of the black Dragon

"No he isn't," protested Hermione.

"Look behind you and see," said Harry.

Hermione heard a growl and looked behind her to see a great white Dragon with wings that stretched out across the horizon. Its claws were as long as her arm. Fear trembled through her.

"Draco," she called to him.

The Dragon swatted Harry aside and Harry fell to the ground struggling to get up. Hermione ran in front of Harry and stood facing the Dragon.

"Stop!" she ordered and the Dragon froze. "This isn't who you are."

"Yessss it issssss,"

"NO ITS NOT!" she yelled back.

"Hermione get out of the way before he kills you," yelled Harry.

"No Harry," she said without looking back at him. She kept her eyes locked on those of the Dragon Draco. "Draco would never hurt me. Not really."

The Dragon came close to her slowly, giving her plenty of time to run. He picked her up in his claws as gently as if she were made of glass.

"Come away with me," he growled. "Pleasssseee."

"Yes," she said. "Just let me stay with you."

"No Hermione you can't!"

A blast from Harry's wand whizzed by Hermione's shoulder and crashed into Draco's Dragon arm. He howled in pain and his grip contracted around her. She cried out in pain as her ribs cracked under the pressure. The Dragon dropped her horrified at what he had done.

"It's okay," she said from her place on the ground, she could taste the blood in her mouth. "It's okay, you didn't mean it…" she tried to plead with him, but Dragon Draco shook his head and with a great swoop of its wings leapt into the sky. He flew away leaving Hermione calling after him to come back...please come back.

* * *

"Granger are you alright?" Draco's shook Hermione awake.

Hermione looked up at Draco and she grabbed his head and yanked it tight to her chest like a drowning woman clings to the lifeline. Draco slipped, not ready for the pull and landed on top of her as she held him to her chest.

He could hear the rapid beating of her heart. His own heart's rhythm nearly matched hers.

He moved to shift his weight off of her.

"No," she protested. "Stay, please stay." Her voice cracked with emotion.

"Okay, okay, I'm staying," said Draco and he placed his arms on either side of her trying to take some of the weight off.

Was she okay? What had she dreamed that she had called out for someone to come back and was now holding him so tightly it almost hurt.

He was thankful for the considerable height difference and the concealment it afforded him, because with his head held tightly between her breasts his body began to respond to the softness of her body beneath him. His hands itched to touch her to mould themselves against that softness. He pressed his hips down into her pallet. He could feel the heat coming from the apex of her thighs against his stomach and he wanted to moan.

 _You need to…not act on instinct here Malfoy_ , he told himself.

She held him fiercely, tightly, for several moments before her arms relaxed and he took that as a signal to move away, but she stopped him, more gently this time.

"Please stay with me," she whispered in his ear and Draco's cock jerked in response.

Stay with her? He wanted to sink into her and never leave. He wanted to kiss her and hold her and touch her and tell her the truth of how much he loved her.

 _You can't do that._

"I can't," said Draco.

"Why?" she asked.

There was nothing Draco could say out loud to answer her. Every truth was too dangerous to utter and every lie would not pass through his lips.

"Tell me why Draco. Why can't you just stay with me?"

"Because…" _Love you, want you, need you._

 _Because if I stay with you I am afraid of what I'll do, that I'll try and touch you and it will ruin everything._

"Please," she held him.

It was the please that undid Draco.

When she asked him with a please he could not help but give in to her. He buried his head in the pillow next her and mumbled his response closing his eyes.

"Alright."

* * *

 **5k+ words in this chapter (my hands were staring to get sore by the end of typing it) I hope like the ending. What did everyone think of the dream? Also I hope you all like how I'm writing Fred. I'm writing him a little over the top for the sarcasm and jokes because everyone has different ways of dealing with stress and I feel like this is the way that Fred would deal with things. Let me know what you think. Thanks so much and look forward to hearing from in the reviews. Cheers.**


	31. Chapter 29: The Waking Dream

**400! guys have floored me. I never expected to get that high. As a thank you breaking that milestone, here is a BONUS UPDATE. You guys rock. Thank you so much to everyone for the feedback since last update especially:** Danielle804, alluringmango, alannalove1990, Aid4, Starearth, TripleLLL, Bloodred 321, Aikello, Fanficfan826, AnayaR, procrastinationlevel100, ChildofBrisingr,Rouch, Neshaisabookworm, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Ayr, mega700201, tomfeltonswifey, Dauntless10, RotcehM **as well as the guests "guest" and "who"**

 **I am really happy to know that people are happy with how I am writing Fred. I really do love his character, so I am trying to do him justice. Also I have had a lot of fun writing the interactions between him and Draco.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter: 29 The Waking Dream

 _"Please."_

The please seemed to do something to Draco. Hermione relaxed slightly as Draco let out a shuddering breath and closed his eyes and let a little of his weight go on her. He turned his face towards her shoulder speaking half into her pillow.

"Alright," he said, his voice muffled.

"Thank you," said Hermione and squeezed him tight. Somehow it meant so much to her to have him agree to stay.

 _And why does it mean so much?_ Her inner voice asked. She dismissed the question, needing to not think about anything else other than the fact that she was here and so was Draco and he had agreed to stay.

A moment passed the fear he would leave dissipated and Hermione became aware of Draco and the fact that he was there with her physically. She felt his heartbeat and realized it was fast.

 _Why is his heartbeat so fast?_

 _You probably scared him with your nightmare and how upset you were._

 _He cares,_ her heart squeezed in her chest and she absently stroked a hand down his back. He stiffened for a moment and she wondered if she had done something wrong, but then he relaxed again.

As a few more moments passed she felt as his heartbeat slowed and then he took a deep breath in and shifted.

"Come on," he said and got up.

"Where are we going?" she asked, surprised at the sudden movement.

"To my bed, this pallet wasn't designed for two," he held out his hand to her and Hermione accepted it pulling herself up.

Draco climbed into his bed and lifted the covers for Hermione to join. She hesitated for the briefest of moments and Draco sighed and got out of bed.

"Get in," he said.

"What are you doing?"

"Just get in bed would you Granger?" said Draco tilting his head back slightly. "If that's what you want."

"It is, it's just...I want to be clear-"

"You don't want anything physical from me," Draco interrupted. "I know, its fine. I won't take advantage and we can put some sheets and a pillow between us."

"You're okay with all this?"

"It's what you need isn't it?" he asked.

"That wasn't a yes."

"It wasn't a no either," he said and looked at her. "Come rest," he said gently. "Feel better. I'll stay with you. You're safe with me."

 _You're safe with me._

The words rattled around inside Hermione's head for a moment before settling down inside her in a calming way.

No one else was around it was just her and Draco and she was safe with him.

Hermione climbed into the bed and wrapped her blanket from the pallet around her. Draco climbed back into the bed and placed a pillow between the lower half of their bodies then pulled her in tight against his chest. Hermione curled her back into him. He felt warm and solid and strong against her back. His chest rising and falling became almost hypnotic and her breathing strived to match his.

Time passed and Hermione felt the moment that Draco fell asleep. His body relaxed, the arm over top her became heavier and his breathing changed. She lay awake for another hour or so looking out the window at the cloudy night sky.

Hermione cuddled closer to him and felt the pillow between them. Somehow the pillow was both wonderful and terrible; wonderful because it made her feel safe and showed just how much he cared, and terrible because it reminded her how he didn't really want her.

The pillow between them began to embody _everything_ between them and as Hermione lay there she began to hate the pillow.

A shot time later Draco shifted and rolled onto his back. Hermione rolled over so that she could look at him. The pillow got in the way and she picked it up and threw it furiously at the far wall. It fell against the floor with a soft plop and she wanted to scream at it and tear it apart She reached for her wand and then realized how ridiculous it would be to destroy a pillow with a wand and stopped herself.

She looked back at Draco's sleeping face.

 _You shouldn't want to be closer to him_ , she scolded herself.

 _What about Ron?_ Hermione rubbed her eyes. It was the first time she had thought about Ron in what felt like a while. She felt a pang in her chest. Sleeping in a bed with Draco. Was that a betrayal?

 _No its not because nothing is going to happen because Draco doesn't want you that way anyways._

 _But if he did…_

 _If he did I wouldn't sleep here next to him._

 _I've never cheated. I'm not that girl._

 _What do you call kissing Draco after looking inside his mind?_

Heat and shame rolled through Hermione. She hadn't meant to. She had just gotten so caught up in the moment and everything…

 _You and Ron haven't even really had a talk…its not like you're boyfriend and girlfriend right now. You're still mad at him for leaving you and Harry._

 _But he came back…_

Hermione turned away from Draco facing the far window. This was all too much. She didn't want to think about any of the drama-any of the complicatation. Her world was complicated enough as it was living here as a prisoner just trying to survive.

 _It could be so much worse..._ she found herself thinking and she looked back at Draco.

 _Think of where you would be without him..._

 _Dead._

 _Or worse..._ She thought of Greyback, she thought of Bellatrix and then she thought of Draco and how he had saved her from death and saved her from a fate worse than death. She had to figure out a way, when she got out of here, to convince her friends of the truth of Draco; that he wasn't evil, that he had saved her. Hermione let out a sigh shifting to the other side of the bed. she closed her eyes, praying for a dreamless sleep. After much tossing and turning fell asleep.

* * *

In the middle of the night, while sleep still had a firm hold on Hermione, her body sought out Draco. She rolled and shifted back to him wrapping her arms around his body. In his sleep Draco welcomed the touch openly and he turned into her so that they were both facing and holding each other for the rest of the night.

* * *

The wind in the oasis was soft and warm. Draco stood on the edge of the dock looking out over the water as the sunset glowed setting slowly in the distance colouring the sky in hues of orange and deep purple. Little white clouds floated catching all the colours so they looked like cotton candy in the air.

"Aren't you going to come in?" came Hermione's voice from bellow him and Draco looked down to see Hermione treading water just a few feet in front of him. Through the soft ripples of water he could see that she was clad in a soft white bikini with yellow daisies. It was sweet and sexy in an almost innocent way.

"I don't have anything to wear," he answered.

"Sure you do," she said with a smile. "You're wearing swim trunks aren't you?" she laughed.

Draco looked down to see that he was wearing a pair of long blue board shorts. Since he knew he didn't own anything that looked quite like the shorts he was suddenly wearing, a part of his mind let him know that he was dreaming.

It made him just a little sad.

He decided that he didn't care. If he was here with her, even only as a dream, it was a good thing..

"Jump in why don't you?" called Hermione with a wave of her arm. Draco smiled and took two steps and leaped into the water entering with a graceful dive. When he surfaced he whipped his hair around shaking the water off and looking at Hermione.

"Show off," she said with a wry smile and gave his shoulder a playful punch before wrapping her arms around his shoulders. She smiled and kissed him. Draco kissed her back.

Suddenly they were on the couch on the island. The fire was blazing behind them. Draco fisted his hands in her hair and kissed her, but he couldn't feel her there with him. It was agony that he had her there with him but couldn't feel her in his hands. The sensation of touched dampened to the point of torture.

"Please, just let me kiss you for real," he said softly with his eyes closed. When he opened them again the scene had changed and he was laying in his bed with Hermione looking up at him.

"Draco," she said his name, her voice breathy as she blinked up at him.

Draco bent his head down and brushed his lips lightly across Hermione's.

This time it was like lightening had struck and Draco realized he was no longer dreaming. The arms wrapped around him were Hermione's arms. The pillow was gone and he could feel every curve of her body. Her legs were tangled with his, one hooked up and over his hip so that their lower halves were pressed close together. The heat was scotching. He was so hard it hurt.

She was everything, she was the only thing that mattered.

Reality sunk in.

 _What the fuck did I just do?_ Draco asked himself.

 _You just ruined everything_ , was his answer.

Only she didn't yell, or scream, or hit him. Instead, Hermione closed her eyes and with a small smile yawned and slumped back into sleep.

Draco lay their utterly shell shocked. How could she just go back to sleep?

 _Fuck._

Draco ground his teeth together. He couldn't move for fear of disturbing her. He was happy she hadn't freaked out or punched him in the face and wasn't about to push his luck.

Hermione shifted and Draco bit the inside of his cheek stifling a moan as she rubbed against him. Her warmth pressing against his aching cock. Draco's eyes rolled backwards and be blinked praying for control.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck._

She shifted again, making a little sound of contentment. Draco squeezed his eyes tightly shut and clenched his fists to tight the bones ached from it. He wanted to respond. He wanted to grab her hips and grind against her more firmly. He wanted to wake her up and kiss her for real. That brush of lips had sent electricity though him. He could only imagine what it would be like to kiss her the way he wanted to, to taste her mouth.

Physical heat began to increase between them as Draco's body went into overdrive from attraction and from holding back. Eventually, from the warmth Hermione rolled away from him giving Draco a moments sweet reprieve from the onslaught to his senses. Draco practically leaped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. When he closed the door behind him he began to pace like a trapped tiger. He went over to the mirror.

"What the hell was that?" he demanded of his reflection.

 _You knew sleeping next to her wasn't a good idea._

 _You could have ruined everything,_ he scolded himself.

 _But I didn't_ , he answered. And why was that? Draco began pacing again and then paused mid-stride.

Their were two logical explanations. Either he had kissed Hermione and she hadn't minded.

 _Ha fat-chance._

Or…She had been sleeping, just like he had thought he was. Her eyes had been open. She had said his name, but maybe…maybe she was dreaming too.

 _Then why did she say your name?_

 _What was she dreaming of?_

Draco went over to the sink and splashed his face with water then looked at himself.

 _You're going out of your mind._

He took a deep breath. He wanted to go back to bed. His arms ached to hold her again, but he couldn't; not like this. Draco looked down at the front of his Pajama pants. They were still severely tented. Shucking off the pants Draco walked over to the shower and waved his hand starting the waterfall flow of water. He stepped under the cool spray hissing as the cool drops hit his heated flesh. He closed his eyes and let the water flow over him. It was several moment until he realized that the coolness of the water wasn't dampening his arousal. His skin on his shoulders was cool to the point of almost shivering which made the heat of his arousal seem so much more intense.

Giving up on willing it away with his mind or the water Draco waved his hand and the temperature of the water rose to a much more pleasant level. Draco took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

He imagined Hermione standing there with him under the shower, her face covered in tiny droplets of water. He imagined her smiling, laughing., watched her hand go back to smooth her curly hair out of the way as the water began to soak through taming her wild curls. He imagined her hand reaching out towards him as she blinked at him. The fantasy froze and Draco opened his eyes staring blankly at the tile as the water traced little paths down to the floor.

 _What would she be like?_ He wondered.

Would she know how to touch him?

Had she touched many men before?

Or would he be the first to have those delicate fingers wrap around him?

"Fuck," he groaned at that thought. He knew it was archaic. He knew it was unfair to want to be the first; the primal side of his mind didn't care. The idea that he could be her first...her only. That second idea meant more to him. If he could be her only.

 _You'll never be her only._

Draco shook away the bitter thought.

 _You can imagine it though..._

He closed his eyes again and this time he imagined something he knew-something more innocent:

He imagined her lips.

He brought his hand to himself; wrapped his fingers around his shaft in a tight grip. He imagined her watching him. Imagined her eyes looking straight at him. In his mind he saw her pupils dilated, her eyes darken, her lips part and then she kissed him.

Draco came in a great shuddering convulsion his hips jerking forward as he spurted onto the floor.

He kept his eyes closed as the little after-shocks rippled through him and he imagined her kissing him again. Little by little he let go of the overwhelming tension until he finally opened his eyes and reached for the soap to wash off.

Several moments later Draco stepped out of the shower and put on a fresh pair of pants. He towel dried his hair quickly using his wand to finish the job he went back out to the bed. Hermione was curled in a small ball and she was making tiny sounds of distress. He went over to her and crawled in to the bed next to her wrapping his arms around her from behind and holding her.

"Hush, it's okay," he whispered into her ear. "I'm here," he rubbed her arm gently pulling her body back against his. "You're safe. I won't let anyone hurt you."

Hermione mumbled something incoherent and then her body slumped as whatever was tormenting her vanished. She let out a deep sigh and slipped back into sleep as his little spoon.

A small smile pulled at the corner of Draco's mouth. He raised his head to look over at her. She looked so beautiful, so peaceful, so Innocent.

"I…" _love you,_ he finished silently, unable to say the words out loud. He dropped his head back to the pillow, closed his eyes and followed her down into the dark of sleep.

* * *

Draco woke as the first rays of morning light touched his eyelids.

He blinked slowly and breathed in the warm scent of Hermione. His soul felt a strange peace in that half waking state; a peace that made him, for one small moment, feel like everything was going to be alright. He wanted to hold on to it, and her, forever.

He blinked again and looked down at her. They were wrapped up in one another. Morning and her closeness brought to his attention that they were once again pressed intimately close. Once again, his cock, hard and ready, was pressed up between them against Hermione stomach. Draco took a deep breath.

 _I could get used to waking up like this._

 _Well SHE is not going to be happy if she wakes up to you like this._

 _Yeah, well...Apparently she likes this position,_ he thought back, since once again she was holding him with her one leg slung half across his hip.

Draco closed his eyes. He just wanted to stay for a little longer, bask in her warmth and the warmth of the morning sun.

 _Stop being selfish and get out of bed before she wakes up._

 _Being able to hold her like this all night is more than you ever deserved now get up before you ruin it by upsetting her._

He thought of the kiss. With great effort Draco extracted himself gently from Hermione's arms. She made a cute little noise and curled up nestling deeper into the covers. She looked so cute. Draco felt his heart squeeze.

He smiled a sad smile down at her.

"You're beautiful," he whispered.

 _And I love you_ , he mentally added, then went and made three breakfasts.

* * *

Fred was up and waiting when Draco came to the room in his wardrobe.

"How do you feel?"

"Slightly like a snail without its house, but okay all things considered," answered Fred.

"What?" Draco blinked.

"I'm feeling sluggish," said Fred as if he were explaining to a child. "But good otherwise." Fred got up from the bed. "So do I get to see Hermione today?"

"Yes," said Draco. He wanted Hermione to see Fred-wanted her to be happy.

"Good," Fred clapped his hands together. "Food then?"

"Yes," said Draco, "Enjoy."

"Eggs Bennie, looks fancy. Your maid make this?"

"No," said Draco flatly turning away.

"House elf?"

"We don't currently have one," said Draco somberly thinking of Dobby.

"Your mum then?" Fred asked and shoved a bite potato into his mouth, clearly missing the tone. "Mmmm. S'good."

"No," Draco rolled his eyes emphatically. "My mother did not make breakfast for the member of the order I am secretly sheltering," the Sarcasm was biting. "She doesn't know you're here. It would be awfully conspicuous if I asked her to make three breakfasts."

"I suppose your right," said Fred and he took another bite letting out a second appreciative moan. "Well it certainly good, who ever made it," said Fred shoving a large piece of eggs Benedict into his mouth and smiling. "Very good."

"Well, I'm glad you like it. That means Hermione will too."

"No doubt," said Fred.

Draco went to the door.

"So who made it then?" asked Fred taking a sip of his juice.

"Me," said Draco before closing the door behind him.

Had he bothered to look back he would have been mildly entertained by the slack jawed expression of bewilderment on the Weasely Twins face.

* * *

Hermione was still asleep when Draco came back to the room and he decided to let her sleep in a little while. He made his way downstairs to his parents main library hoping to find some book on doorway spells. Instead he found Snape.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded.

"Delivering a package for the Dark Lord," answered Snape gesturing to a trunk.

"What's inside?"

"I have no idea," answered Snape.

"Right."

"And how are things with you?" Snape asked. "And…the girl."

"Fine," answered Draco "She continues to entertain me," he said loud enough so that if anyone was eves dropping they would hear him clearly.

"No one else it at home at the moment," said Snape. "Your father and mother left just as I was coming in."

"Did they say where they were going?" asked Draco surprised that his mother would leave without saying goodbye.

"To brunch I believe," answered Snape.

Draco processed Snape's words for a moment.

"If you don't mind I have a school to run," said Snape and he raised his wand to apperate.

"Wait!" said Draco.

"Yes?" said Snape turning his head.

Draco debated for a moment.

 _You can trust him,_ he told himself

 _You can't trust anyone._

 _He's on your side._

 _He's on the Dark Lord's side._

 _But he has vowed to protect and help you._

 _And how far exactly do you want to push that?_ He asked himself.

"What is it Mr. Malfoy," Drawled Snape.

"Goyle's family's house had these doors," said Draco. "That when you tapped on them with your wand would become passageways to somewhere else."

"And?" said Snape.

"And I want to know how to make one."

"And just why would you like to know that Mr. Malfoy?"

"Because I want to make one myself," he answered. "Times are getting more dangerous," he thought of the excuse on his feet. "And I want to be able to get away quickly if we come under attack again. You vowed to help and protect me, this falls under that umbrella."

"So it would seem," Snape inhaled deeply and straightened. "I am not personally familiar with the spells needed to create that type of passageway." he paused. "However, I do believe I there are volumes on the subject at Hogwarts. Since you seem to have developed an interest, and in the interest of preserving your life and health, I will do my utmost to bring them with me upon my return here."

"And when are you planning on coming back?" asked Draco.

"Soon," said Snape.

"Good," answered Draco feeling a little more calm. He would have a solution to at least one of his problems soon. Hopefully whatever magic was needed wasn't too far above his abilities. He felt his wand heat with his thoughts and reached down with his hand to touch the wand affectionately. Snape caught the movement and raised a brow but said nothing of it.

"If that is all…" Snape trailed off.

"Yes, thank you."

Snape gave a slow nod and then vanished in a whirl of black.

Draco stood looking at the spot where Snape had been for a moment and then went back up to the room.

He looked at Hermione, not wanting to wake her and disturb a peaceful sleep and yet wanting to wake her for the sake of her own happiness. Draco stepped forward and touched Hermione's shoulder.

* * *

"Wake up sleepy head," a voice pulled Hermione from the warmth of sleep.

"I don't want to," she said curling into her covers. She had had the strangest night. She had had some terrible dreams which seemed to stop before they fully took hold and she had dreamed Draco had kissed her. It had felt so real...and so right. It still kind of made her uncomfortable how much she had wanted that kiss and how much she had enjoyed it.

"You'll miss the surprise then," said Draco.

"Surprise?" Hermione sat bolt upright and her nose crashed off Draco's shoulder painfully. "Owwww," she said and rubbed it.

"I take it you like surprises then?" said Draco with a small chuckle.

Hermione frowned.

"It's not funny, that hurt," It did actually hurt a little.

"Oh poor thing, want me to kiss it better?" asked Draco.

Hermione froze for a moment at the joke, thinking back to the dream.

 _You shouldn't be dreaming things like that._ She told herself. The protest seemed hollow even to her own mental ears.

Hermione chose to ignore the feeling and she smacked his shoulder instead. Draco laughed and then darted in giving her nose a quick peck.

Hermione sat shocked for second time. He was being playful…and he had kissed her nose.

 _Relax Hermione, he didn't mean it like that._

Draco was already half way across the room over at his table leaving her two options. She could make a big deal of the little peck on her nose or she could just accept that Draco, for some strange reason, was in a good mood.

"Okay," she said getting up out of bed. "What is going on?" she crossed her arms over her chest and Draco smiled at her. "I feel like I should be worried. Should I be worried?"

"No," said Draco a little more seriously, still smiling. "It's nothing bad, I promise you are going to like it. Now," his smile brightened. "Come eat your breakfast first and then I'll take you to your surprise."

"But I need to know why you're acting so weird."

Draco smiled mischievously.

"If I had only known," he said cockily. "That surprises were one of your weak spots before...I would have taken full advantage of that fact."

"Oh hush you," she said coming to sit across from him. "If you knew before you would have probably stuck snakes in my desk at school or something and I don't like those kinds of surprises," she dug into her meal with fervor.

She was several bites into some of the best eggs Benedict she had had in her life when she noticed that Draco wasn't eating and his face had fallen. He was looking out the window and the light and shadow playing across his face showed how tense he had become.

"Draco," she said realizing it was her comment that had killed his mood.

"Its fine," he said turning back to her and he smiled. It didn't reach his eyes and Hermione felt a tremendous sense of loss at having killed the playful Draco.

 _I liked him like that_ , she lamented.

"I'm so-"

"Don't even think about apologizing," he warned. "Or you're going to end up with orange juice over your head."

"What? Why?" she asked startled at his comment.

"Because you need to learn to stop apologizing to me for silly things like that."

"But-"

"No buts," He said firmly. "Now eat and enjoy," he gave her a smaller smile but this one at least was genuine. "The sooner you're done and cleaned up the sooner you get to find out."

"Right," Hermione shoved a big bike into her mouth and coughed.

"Don't choke and die," said Draco frowning. "You can't be surprised if you're dead."

Hermione laughed and coughed again reaching for her juice she chuckled.

"I suppose you're right," she said after her drink.

"I often am," said Draco taking a bite of his own meal. Hermione rolled her eyes at him and continued to scarf down the food, only at a slightly more reasonable pace.

"Have you read any more of the Wilde?" asked Draco as Hermione ate. He he seemed happy to see that she was enjoying the meal he had prepared which made Hermione feel warm inside.

"Pretty much the whole thing," said Hermione between bites. "I haven't re-read the Picture of Dorian Grey yet though."

"Why not?"

"I find it terribly depressing. He was so obsessed with being beautiful it turned everything ugly."

Draco's face clouded over once more.

"What's wrong?" asked Hermione sensing his shift.

He opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out. He closed his mouth took a breath.

 _He wanted to Lie.._.Hermoine realized.

"Nothing that I want to talk about," said Draco wincing.

"Oh..." Hermione frowned. "Was it something I said?"

"No," Draco shook his head. "You continue to be an excellent companion for meals," Draco's smile seemed forced. "I however, it seems, have become less adept at what qualifies for enjoyable conversation."

"I like talking with you," Hermione protested.

"Only because you have been deprived of conversation long enough to have your perception warped," said Draco dismissively.

"That's not true!" said Hermione and she put down her fork. "I don't like that you just said that."

"You don't have to like it for it to be true."

"It's not true though."

"Obviously it is or I wouldn't be able to say it," countered Draco.

 _He has a point._

Hermoine let out a huff. "Just because you're being honest doesn't mean you're correct. It may be _your_ truth but it isn't _THE_ truth," Hermione crossed her arms over her chest.

"Oh?" said Draco sitting back in his chair. "Do enlighten me."

"I can't talk with my friends about the books I read," she said emphatically.

"No, I don't suppose the Weasel is much into literature, and Potter only seems to crack books for the sake of passing classes."

"Don't call him that," said Hermione her face growing dark.

"Sorry," said Draco with a sigh. "Old habits die hard."

His immediate and genuine apology was a surprise. He really sounded like he meant it.

"You are right though," she admitted begrudgingly after a moment. If he was going to be honest, she should try to be too.

"So I qualify as good conversation on the grounds that I can talk books with you?"

"Yes," said Hermione. "Specifically that you can talk about them in an intelligent and intellectual manner and that your eyes don't glaze over when I talk about my opinions on them."

"Why on earth would they glaze over?" asked Draco with a frown. "I find your opinions immensely fascinating."

"Do you really?" asked Hermione, a,strange glee filling her at the thought.

"Yes."

* * *

Hermione lit up at Draco's words and a big smile split right across her face. His heart stuttered in his chest.

She was stunning when she smiled. He felt like he had won a small lottery making her smile like that. Immediately he wanted to make it happen again.

 _She'll smile when she sees Fred is alive_ , thought Draco. _That will make the risk worth while._

"Thank you," she said with a pleased look and she went back to eating looking the part of a feline who had just caught a mouse.

"Welcome," said Draco remembering that was what she had asked him to say instead of brushing off her thanks.

Hermione looked up at him over her plate and a second softer smile replaced the first one. She had a tenderness and affection in her eyes and Draco realized it was directed at him for listening and remembering to do what she had asked of him.

He swallowed wanting to tell her the truth of his feelings. A part of him just blurt them out right there. Instead he picked up his glass and finished the orange juice in one quick gulp.

Hermione finished her meal quickly and set aside the plate.

"Can I see the surprise now?" she asked.

"Yes, but you have to trust me and keep your eyes closed."

"Okay."

"Promise?"

"I promise," she answered and stood and closed her eyes lifting her chin up.

Draco took her hand and led her to the wardrobe. He whispered the incantation low enough that she couldn't possibly hear it and led Hermione into his oasis. Draco's breath caught at the sight of her finally there for real. This wasn't a dream or a fantasy. It scared the living hell out of him how much he likes swing her there.

"Where are we?" Hermione asked.

"Somewhere safe," said Draco softly. His hand squeezed hers gently. He led her forward, her trusting hand in his. With a wave of his want the deck extended out over the water and he lead her safely to the island.

"I smell the ocean," she said.

"Yes," said Draco.

"Are we by the ocean?"

"Sort of," was all he chose to say and he watched as she puzzled over it.

"Can I open my eyes yet?"

"Not yet," he said quietly. He head her inside and watched as she tried to figure out where they were without peeking. It was cute to see her nose scrunch up with thought. Draco unlocked the door and Fred got up immediately.

"Hermione!" Fred called her name.

Hermiones eyes shot open wide with shock.

"Fred?!"

* * *

 **And that is where I leave you. I hope you enjoyed this bonus update. Please let me know what you thought of everything. Cheers and have an awesome weekend.**


	32. Chapter 30: The Errand

**Thank you to everyone who took the time to review, It was nice to see so many new people mixed in with my awesome regulars. Thank you to** : Aid4, tomfeltonswifey, Fanficfan826, apls79, ASJS, Scorpia11, Addfam2008, Kotodashi Kyoshi, alluringmango, mega700201 mmiller0000 , Jen7, Ayr, RotcehM , mb1995, .babe , AnayaR **and guests** "Who", "MB" and "D"

 **This chapter is dedicated to** Ayr. **Thank you for your support and taking the time to comment and stick with me. I appreciate you.**

 **So, fun fact-even taking out all my ramblings this Fanfiction is now longer than "The Prisoner of Azkaban" Not even close to being as cool as that epic piece of writing from the genius we all know and love...but still its now longer. That's right folks this is pretty much a novel, and there is more to come. Hope I'm keeping your interest.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 30: The Errand

Draco watched as shock gave way to pure unfiltered joy. Hermione's face broke open almost simultaneously into tears and a smile. She dropped Draco's hand like a forgotten toy and rushed over to Fred and practically jumping on him. Draco winced at the impact and Fred let out a grunt as he caught her wrapping his long arms around her in a familial embrace.

"You're alive," she had gone from zero to bawling in about three second flat and yet it was pure joy that exuded from her voice. "You're alive."

"Yeah," said Fred hugging her tight. "So are you apparently." He looked over Hermione's shoulder back at Draco. The redhead was obviously a little surprised that Draco had actually brought Hermione to him as promised. The glance was quick enough that Hermione didn't catch it, she was too caught up in holding on to her friend. Draco did catch the look and he made a mental note that Fred was far from trusting him.

You can't blame him with your track record.

"I thought you were dead," said Hermione finally pulling back. She wiped her eyes and looked at Fred. She reached out with gentle finger tips and touched the scar where Fred's eye should be "I saw you...laying on the floor. You weren't moving."

"I got an axe in the face," said Fred letting her touch him. "A magical one at that. Really quite painful. I don't recommend it." He smiled for her and Draco was amazed at the Weasely twins' ability to sidestep his own pain in order to make a joke that made Hermione feel better.

Hermione laughed and hugged Fred again. Fred closed his eyes and hugged Hermione back. His face softened in a way that was filled with love, real love and Draco swallowed. Fred didn't look like he wanted to sleep with Hermione, the hug didn't make Draco romantically jealous, and yet he felt a pang of jealousy at what they had together. A friendship that wasn't based on whose family you belonged to or whether or not you wanted to sleep with the other person. It was based on…well love and affection and it was something Draco didn't have.

Up until that moment Draco hadn't really missed it from his life, but now as he stood back and too the whole exchange in he felt a hollow space in his chest like something very important was missing.

 _That must be what it looks like to have a real,_ he thought and he found himself wishing that he could have something like that one day.

"But...how?" Hermione asked wiping at her eyes which were still sending happy tears cascading down her cheeks. "How are you alive?"

"Well...far as I can see…with my remaining eye." He looked at Draco pointedly. "It appears as if Malfoy here is responsible for my not being dead," Fred reached around and rubbed the back of his neck. "Though I am still wrapping my mind around that one."

Hermione turned to Draco.

"You saved him?"

Draco nodded. She beamed at him the smile warmed every inch of Draco's body. She was looking at him like he was the greatest thing and for the briefest of moments Draco felt like it was true. Then the smile vanished as quickly as it had come.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me before?!" she demanded marching over to Draco and hitting his chest soundly with the side of her fist. "You let me think I was responsible for him being dead for days!" she hit him again.

Draco made no move to defend himself. She was happy Fred was alive and that was what mattered. She had a million reasons to be mad at him, did it really matter if she was mad at him for this?

"Hermione," Fed called out from behind her.

"How could you?!" she demanded. "You asshole!"

"Hermione!" Fred said louder.

"What?" she demanded looking back at the redhead.

"I was unconscious the entire time. I just woke up last night."

Draco's eyes widened a little. Fred was…Defending him? Draco's eyebrows knit together. Why would the Weasely defend him? Now was the most opportune moment to side with Hermione and try to overpower him or escape or even just turn Hermione against him. Instead Fred was sticking up for him. It felt odd and yet Draco really appreciated at the same time.

"What's that got to do with anything?" Hermione asked Fred throwing her hands up in the air.

"He didn't want to get your hopes up for nothing," said Fred with a shrug. "Leastwise that's what he told me."

"Is that true?" Hermione demanded swinging back to face Draco. Draco could not name the expression on her face. He couldn't read her and that worried Draco because he didn't know what the right answer was-so he opted for the simple truth:

"Yes," he answered.

"Well why didn't you say so!" she said exasperated. "You let me hit you."

"It seemed like you needed to."

"Oh you great git!" she hit him again, this time with an open palm and no real malice. She rolled her eyes. "You are so infuriating."

"You're the one who's being violent," said Draco pointedly.

"It's your fault," countered Hermione and she almost smiled at him. Draco looked down at her and was about to smile back when he caught sight Fred taking in the exchange with a scrutinous look on his face.

 _Careful Draco, just because he stood up for you once doesn't mean he's going to take your side when he realises you have a thing for his little brother's girl._

"Tell me what happened," Hermione demanded crossing her arms and going serious again. "Tell me why you let me believe he was dead?"

"Hermione..." Fred said her name again, trying to pull her away from the warpath she was on with Draco as the target at the end of the line.

"Its fine," Draco said to Fred and then he looked back down at Hermione.

"He was in a coma," explained Draco. "I didn't want to let you know he was still alive while there was a chance he wouldn't pull through," Draco took a breath. "I didn't want to put you through losing him twice. I hated the idea of your suffering a loss like that twice and didn't want to risk you blaming yourself for his death all over again."

"Oh," Hermione's face crumpled as she processed everything he had said. Her bottom lip trembled. "I'm sorry," she finally managed and threw herself on Draco in a hug burying her face in his chest. She started crying again only this time it wasn't happy tears and it wrenched at Draco's chest. He didn't want her to cry like this. She didn't need to feel bad.

"It's okay," said Draco stroking her hair, "It's okay Hermione please don't cry."

Past Hermione's head he could see Fred looking at the two of them now much more quizzically, his head cocked to the side as if trying to figure out something important. Warning bells went off inside Draco's head.

Hermione pulled back.

"You save him. You kept him safe. You nursed him back to health."

"Yeah, he did," said Fred. "Though his bedside manner could use a little improvement."

Draco rolled his eyes at Fred.

"I'm not a nurse," he said dryly. "I'm not even planning on studying anything to do with healing. I've never been that good at healing spells," _not till recently that is_ , he added mentally.

"No, you're not a nurse otherwise you would have to get one of those cute little outfits," said Fred with a sigh. "I love those lovely outfits," he sighed and then snapped up straight. "I absolutely respect the women who wear them," he said with conviction. "They are heroes' every one. Nurses have a hard job to do and I hear in the muggle world it worse, so you have to respect them." He gave a nod and then slid back down. "That said…I swear just seeing a nice pair of legs in a nurses outfit gives you the will to fight and keep living."

"Fred!" said Hermione laughing.

"What?" he asked with a shrug and a smile.

"I really am so happy you're alive," she answered shaking her head.

"Me too," said Fed. "It certainly trumps the alternative."

"I should say so," said Hermione wiping her eyes then she paused. "Your family! They need to know!"

"They can't know yet," Draco warned.

"Why not?" asked Hermione.

"Because, we need to keep Fred being alive on the down low until we have a plan in place to get out," Draco explained calmly. "The last place that Fred was seen alive was here and everyone thinks he died here. If he suddenly comes out as being alive it would let everyone know that there was a traitor inside this house, which would put everyone on high alert and make it almost impossible for me to hide the fact that that I am trying to keep you safe," he said looking down into her eyes intently. "It would also make it much harder to hide Fred," he added clearing his throat and looking away.

"I guess that makes sense," said Hermione.

"I hadn't actually thought of that," said Fred.

"Yes, well..." said Draco. "Slytherin-Cunning. It's a thing. Speaking of, I do have a plan."

"Care to let us in on it mate?" asked Fred.

"Yes," said Draco.

 _Did he just call me mate as in…Friend?_

 _No, don't be silly, it's just his common vernacular._ Draco shook his head mentally and then continued.

"When you're better," he said to Fred. "You're going to leave with a message of when and where to attack to get me and Hermione out of here safely."

"You and Hermione?" Fred looked surprised.

"Yes," answered Hermione. "The Dark Lord set a Bind between us which he can make Draco use in order to find me."

"Yeah, I remember him saying something about that when I woke up. I was slightly distracted by the headache and the whole being tied up portion of things," Fred waved his hand in the air. "Anyways, continue."

"Right," said Draco. "Which brings us back to the plan. If it looks like I was taken prisoner, then the Bind doesn't matter; It can't be used to make me find Hermione because I won't be around to use it."

"I'm not sure if you want to get taken prisoner by us mate," said Fred, using the friendly title again. "Not after that photo you sent."

There was a momentary silence and Hermione reached out a hand to Draco slipping it in his. He looked down at her Hand. The memory of that night, of what he had to do to her in order to make that photo. Draco shuddered and closed his eyes.

 _Don't think about it,_ he told himself, but he couldn't help it. He heard her screams fresh in his head and he wanted to run. Hermione squeezed his hand.

 _You shouldn't be holding her hand. You don't deserve her forgiveness or affection._

"He did it to save me from a much worse fate," Hermione said, her tone even and strong. "You-know-who has a habit of sending body parts. If Draco hadn't thought quick on his feet you all would have received a piece of me instead of that photo."

"That's monstrous," said Fred.

"Yes," said Draco opening his eyes.

This was getting too intense. Draco didn't want to think about that night. He didn't want to re-live it. It made the fact that he had slept next to her last night, kissed her, seem so wrong: like he had broken some kind of a rule, crossed some kind of a line.

"It is monstrous," he pulled his hand away from Hermione.

 _Like me,_ he thought.

 _Like what I did…That was monstrous too._

It didn't matter how many time Hermione said it was okay, it wasn't. It would never be okay. Even if she could forgive him for what he had done he would never be able to forgive himself. There was no penance great enough to tip the scales and right the wrong.

"I don't care if your friends want to take their pound of flesh," Draco continued. "I deserve to be punished for all I've done."

"No you don't!" protested Hermione, just as Draco had known she would. "You've done everything to save me and you've endured enough punishment already."

"I don't want to argue," said Draco shaking his head. He didn't, he just wanted to go. His skin felt too tight. His neck felt hot. He wanted to get away from everything, from everyone, but he couldn't. They were already inside the place that he usually went to hide from the world. Draco itched at his arm scraping his nails across the flesh hard enough to draw pink lines in the pale flesh.

"You won't win an argument with her anyways," said Fred going back over to his bed and sitting down. Draco saw that Fred suddenly looked very tired. "I've hear Hermione argue things and throw facts at you till you just want to roll over and surrender," he smiled at Hermione. "No offense though, I think it's brilliant especially when you do it to my brother."

The atmosphere of the room changed and Hermione shifted away from Draco.

 _That's right, when all this is done she's going back to him._

"Are you okay?" asked Hermione filling the silence and going over to Fred. "You look pale."

"A little worse for the wear," said Fred with a smile, "But all things considered I think I'm doing fine."

"Here," Draco handed Fred a vial stiffly. He met Fred's eyes and saw that the redhead knew exactly what his words had done. They were are reminder to everyone of where Hermione's loyalties were supposed to lay. "Drink up," Draco encouraged.

Fred took the vial without hesitation and threw it back, letting Draco know just how poorly off he was considering his earlier complaints about taste.

"We should let him rest Hermione," said Draco. Fred gave him a fleeting, grateful look.

Hermione looked at Fred and then wrapped her arms around the redhead with all the affection in her heart. Fred hugged her back and then gently directed her towards Draco.

"Close your eyes again," Draco ordered gently.

"Do I have to?" she asked.

"If the dark Lord looks into your mind do you really want him to be able to see where Fred is?" asked Draco.

"No, you're right," she answered. "What about if he looks into your mind?"

"I'm not saying it won't happen, but it is less likely," answered Draco. "And besides. He has no idea Fred is alive and I think we all would like to keep it that way."

"Yes," Hermione nodded then she turned and walked back to Fred hugging him one more time. "I really am so thankful you are alive."

"Yeah," said Fred and he looked back at Draco over Hermione. "Me too."

Draco gave a small tight nod of acknowledgement and then Hermione came back and stood in front of him closing her eyes. Draco took hold her arm above the elbow, not wanting to hold her hand with how raw he felt, and led her gently out of the room closing and locking it behind him.

He walked her out back to the dock which had stretched out to connect the island to the door to the outside world. Draco looked back and paused for a moment just looking at Hermione standing in the sunlight of his oasis.

 _She's here…for real._

 _She belongs here,_ a part of his mind said. He knew that wasn't really true, it didn't change the fact that he wanted her here. He wanted her to be here in place where no one else was allowed. He wanted to let her in. Having her here didn't feel quite as bad as he had thought it would. Her silhouette on his horizon was oddly…calming.

"Why have we stopped Draco?" she asked and her eyebrows knit together creating a cute little line at the top of the bridge of her nose.

Draco couldn't answer, knowing that he couldn't really tell her that the reason they had stopped was because he wanted to take a moment to just memorize her face and what she looked like standing here in the sun in his oasis.

"Draco?" She asked. "Is everything alright?" He watched her eyebrows tighten with stress and he placed his index finger on the line there.

She jerked slightly at the unexpected touch and then reached up with her own hand and followed his arm up from her forehead to his face. She rubbed her thumb against his cheek. He wanted to lean into her touch, instead he stood still and let her touch him afraid that if he gave in even a little it would lead to him giving in to everything and scaring her away.

* * *

"Words cannot express just how much I appreciate what you did for Fred," she said letting him know with her tone just how much she meant it. "I wish there was some way to repay you."

"I am forever in your debt Hermione," said Draco. "There will never be anything to repay."

"But how can that be?" asked Hermione. "When I am the one who owe's you my life?" She wanted to open her eyes so that she could look at him for real. Why couldn't he understand just how much it meant to her to have someone back whom she loved so much? Fred was like a brother to her. He and George were the big brothers she had always wanted and never had.

"You don't owe me anything," he scoffed.

"Yes, I do," she protested.

"No you don't" he shook his head and though she couldn't see it she could feel the motion.

"Please Draco let me feel like I have a little say in my world. Give me the power to say thank you somehow." She felt so powerless. She wanted to make him see, wanted to feel like she was being heard.

"You just did. Your smile, your reaction to seeing him, your joy was payment enough."

"Since when does Draco Malfoy deal in smiles and joy?"

"Since you came into my life and changed everything."

She felt him stiffen and knew that the words had clearly slipped out unintentionally.

"I didn't mean to change everything," she said softly. "I know my being here puts you in a difficult place."

"That's not what I meant at all," said Draco. "You changed things..." he swallowed. "For the better."

Pin prickles climbed up Hermione's arms and she shivered feeling slightly nauseous and she couldn't figure out why. Even though the wind around them was warm, she suddenly felt cold. The kind of cold that you feel when you know you are about to get in trouble. The kind of nauseous you feel when you have done something wrong.

"But...how?" she managed.

"You've made me stronger. Made me better, made me want to be better," he answered and she knew he was being honest because there was no one else around.

Hermione shuddered.

"I'm sorry," he said and dragged her forward. "I shouldn't have said anything."

"Draco wait," Hermione protested.

"Its fine, just forget about it please."

"No," she said and wrenched her hand from his grasp. "I can't forget you saying something like that."

Draco paused.

"You said you wanted to repay me, do it by forgetting this conversation and letting it go," there was a pleading to his voice and it reached Hermione.

 _He's hurting_ , she realized she could almost feel it in the air. There was something about this place. She wasn't sure how, but it felt like it was connected to Draco. Between the atmosphere and the bind she felt hyper-aware of his emotions in that moment and knew he really didn't want to talk about this now-that it was hurting him to talk about it.

She wanted to talk about it, but she didn't want to hurt him.

How could he say something like that and then just apologize and walk away from it?

 _You need to let it go, he deserves that much after everything he had done for you._

"Alright," she said nodding. She held out her hand and waited. A moment later she felt his hand slip into her own, it felt right. He led her back through some kind of a door and then sensed they were back in Draco's room.

"You can open your eyes now," said Draco and Hermione did. She stood there just looking at him. "What?" he asked.

"Nothing," she answered and stepped away.

There was a knock at the door Draco went to answer it but the door opened before he could reach it.

"That was locked for a reason," said Draco. "Namely I don't like people barging in."

"Yes well I knocked," said Lucius smoothing out his hair.

"And I would have answered," ground out Draco. She could tell he was unhappy about the intrusion into his room. Hermione realized why: They had just gotten back when the knock came. It was good timing. A few minutes before and the room would have been empty and his father would have likely sounded some kind of an alarm.

"You are to come downstairs at once, the Dark Lord has an errand for you," said Lucius.

"I'll be right down," said Draco.

"Now Draco," said Lucius.

Draco shot Hermione a glance.

Hermione didn't like this. She had a bad feeling about it coupled with the nausea she had been feeling just a few moments before she got the distinct feeling like something was about to go terribly wrong. They had, had too many good moments in a row. An errand for the dark Lord couldn't be a good thing. She wanted to tell him not to go. She moved to go to him and Draco shook his head and cast a chain around her halting her movements. Hermione could tell it wasn't real. She could barely feel the weight of them and knew she could easily wriggle out.

 _Don't go,_ she thought at him.

She saw him look at her with an expression she couldn't read and then he turned and left.

* * *

Draco followed his father down the stairs to the main room.

Voldemort was sitting on his 'throne' with Bellatrix beside him fawning over him like a high school girl over the star quarterback.

"Ah Draco," said Voldemort. "So good to see you again. I trust you're feeling better?"

"Much, thank you," said Draco.

"Good, then you'll be well enough to help me with a delivery," Draco's eyes went to the trunk that Snape had brought to the house earlier.

"Of course," answered Draco.

Voldemort waved his wand and the trunk opened. A small box lifted out and floated towards them.

"You are to deliver this to the address here," said Voldemort writing an address with his wand on a floating scrap of paper. "You will hand deliver it to a death eater by the name of Vladimir Blackthorn. Only to him do you understand?"

"Yes my Lord."

"Good," said Voldemort. "Don't disappoint me Draco."

"I won't," said Draco. He needed to stay in Voldemort's good graces if he was to keep Hermione safe. "You have my promise that I will do everything in my power to live up to your expectations in this," the truth of the words seemed to ring in Voldemort's ears and he smiled at Draco baring those pointed teeth.

"That's a good boy," Voldemort said and nodded. "Now run along." He turned to Bellatrix and sealed his mouth over hers.

Draco was only too happy to leave.

* * *

Vladimir Blackthorn lived in the darkest end of Knockturn Alley, past Borgin & Burkes. Draco made his way down the street feeling very much exposed. The shadows grew longer with every ally that he passed by. He could see have shaded faces of people who lived for the dark.

When he came to the address he knocked on the door and was greeted by someone from the shadows holding a wand to the side of his head.

"Malfoy," the deatheater said.

"Yes?" asked Draco trying to seem cocky.

"You got a delivery?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Give it to me."

"Not a chance," answered Draco. "Dark Lords orders I am to deliver it to Vladimir Blackthorn by hand and to him only."

"What a good little delivery boy," said the death eater with a snarl. "Let go on in then."

"That was the plan."

The death eater knocked in a simple rhythm on the door and another death eater answered opening the door. This one was a woman Draco recognized from the night of the ball at his house. She had dark black hair which hung down to her mid back and brunt bangs that suited her face impeccably well..

"Hello handsome," she said putting a hand on Draco's chest. "What brings you here?"

"I have a delivery for Vladimir."

"Ahhh," she stroked her hand down the front of his shirt. In another world, in another time he could have appreciated the attention.

Yes, she was a little older than him, likely in hear mid-twenties, but her style was that of someone striving for eternal youth. She had perfect round breasts which were supported by a heavy duty bra which kept them looking perky. His gaze was drawn to them, without allowing himself to linger.

"Nikita," came a low voice. "I see you are ready to entertain our guest." A man stepped out the shadows and Draco recognized him as Blackthorn.

"Of course my lord," said Nikita pouting her lips at the older man.

"Go fetch us something to drink won't you?" Blackthorn ordered smoothly.

"Yes my lord," she answered batting her eyelashes. She sashayed her way over to a cabinet at the other side of the room and pulled out a tray and glasses pouring an amber liquid into several brandy glasses.

"I have a package for you from the dark Lord," said Draco pulling the box from underneath his robes.

"I have been expecting it," said Blackthorn and he took a glass from Nikita's tray and sat down on the couch. "Sit," he ordered. Draco obliged only because it was poor manners to stand.

Nikita came and offered a drink bending down low for him so that her chest was almost in his face.

"Thank you," he said flatly.

Vladimir laughed.

"You seem unaffected by Nikita's charms," said Vladimir. "That is most unusual."

"Yes, well her beauty is not lost on me," said Draco shooting the woman a charming smile. She returned the smile tilting her head at him suggestively. "I am, however, on an errand for the dark lord and that is my priority."

It was a lie. Draco didn't want to be with anyone else other than Hermione and even the casual flirtation with Nikita felt like some kind of a betrayal.

 _Who are you and what have you done with the real Draco Malfoy_? Draco thought at himself.

"What is the point in being evil unless you get to enjoy a little fun along the way?" said Vladimir giving Nikita a nod.

Nikita faced Draco and stretched her legs up and out so that she was straddling Draco facing him. She placed the glass of alcohol in between her ample cleavage.

"Drink up," she said in a sultry tone.

Draco wanted to shove her off his lap.

He knew that would not end well.

Suddenly a window crashed in.

Nikita leapt of Draco as he sprang to his feet. Several members of the order came bursting in through the main door and another came in through the window that had just been cracked in. Blackthorn took one look around picked up the box Draco had delivered and disapperated

"VLADIMIR!" Nikita yelled. A curse caught her across the side of the face and she screamed.

Another curse whizzed near Draco's head and he deflected a second one before it could hit him. His wand was warm and ready in his hands.

A woman came at him and Draco parried and then flung his wand outwards sending the woman careening through the air and into the nearest wall.

"Malfoy!" he heard a familiar voice and looked over to see none other than Ronald Weasely looking at him with hatred in his eyes. A fireball exploded next to Draco. The shockwave sent him flipping sideways into the chair that Vladimir had previously been sitting in. Draco landed painfully feeling his ribs crack with the odd angle of impact.

 _You can't kill Ron,_ Draco found himself thinking, as anger and pain boiled in him. A part of him wanted to though. He had never liked the redhead and now he was the only thing that could keep Hermione from staying in his life.

 _He's going to kill you._

Another curse flew through the air at him and Draco managed to parry it flicking his wand out behind him just in time. He dropped to the ground and rolled. With a flick of his wand he sent out a stunning spell.

Ron deflected it and cast a counter curse. Draco ducked out of the way.

"I'll fucking kill you!" yelled Ron letting out a yell and flinging a strike out at Draco. Draco deflected it sending the energy out to the side so that it blew a hole in the nearest wall.

Draco started to panic. He was far outnumbered and this time he didn't have the advantage of his enemies thinking he was on their side. In the woods he had been able to use that leverage against the death eaters. Here everyone wanted to kill him.

 _They have reason…_

The thought distracted Draco.

Ron lashed out casting an incantation Draco had never heard before. Pain bloomed through Draco's leg and he let out a cry and lashed out with his wand instinctively. The counter spell sent Ron flying into the ceiling. The redhead crashed back to the floor unconscious.

Tonks and Remus came in to the room. Draco was a little surprised, and grateful, that Potter wasn't with them.

"Surrender now Malfoy," Tonks flung Draco back against a wall. His head impacted with a resounding thud. He struggled to raise himself up of the ground.

 _You have to get back, you have to make it back for Hermione._

 _You have to get back to her…_

"You're coming with us," said Remus. "You need to answer for what you've done."

 _Yes I do, but not now_ , thought Draco _. I can't leave Hermione alone._

Determination from thinking of Hermione lent strength to his limbs and Draco pushed himself up off the floor and stood to face his opponents. His leg felt like it was on fire.

"Not going to happen," said Draco and he lifted his wand. He felt the warmth flow through him and spun the wand around his body, once, then twice sending everyone outwards. Every door in the house opened, ever window shattered.

Draco stood in the silence that remained when the spell finished.

His head hurt. He reached back and felt the lump from where he had impacted. When he pulled his fingers back there was blood on them. He looked around him and the world tilted to the side.

Draco dropped to his knees…

and then the world spun out into black.

* * *

 **Hello Cliff.**

 **Yes scrutinous is a word, it's an archaic conjugation of the word scrutinise. Also I hope you don't mind my starting off the chapter with a word like familial. I have faith you all know, or could figure out, what that meant. It just happened to be the exact adjective I wanted to use to describe how Fred hugged Hermione. I wasn't using a thesaurus, I'm just a giant nerd who reads too much.**

 **This chapter is a whopping 5.5 k long-it took soooooo much work, so please show me some love and let me know what you thought of it. I must have read and re-read and re-wrote it 10 times so if I missed anything PM me and I'll fix it but I defs went word-blind by the end.**

 **Look forward to hearing from everyone. Have an awesome week**


	33. Chapter 31: The Dark

**A big thank you to everyone who took the time to drop a review last chapter** : Aid4, Cruellica, LillsBills, RotechM, A101, Jen7, Kotodashi Kyoshi, LovEToReadit, Ayr, Alluringmango, inkolf199, .rtin, lady alegria, Fireheart394, Neshaisabookworm, Laureenkatebautista, mmiller0000, Aikello, Fanfictionfan826, Addfam826, AnayaR **and the guests** "Who" and "D"

 **Welcome to all the new readers and thank you to all the loyal ones who are still here.**

 **FUN FACT: Soooo...I'm working a 12 day in a row stretch this week (well this and next week I am currently on day 7 in a row-hello lunch time upload!) so I won't be able to manage a double update, but I promise I will finish editing the next chapter in time to meet my usual scheduled update next Sunday/Monday regardless of work. I care about you guys-you have stuck with me so I will stick to my posting times (but don't judge me if it doesn't go up till 3 in the morning on Monday okay?)**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. There will be violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 31: The Dark

Hermione stood looking at the closed door in front of her for several moments after Draco left.

 _He didn't say goodbye._

She knew it was because he couldn't for risk of showing he cared in front of his father. Still...worry gnawed at her. What if he didn't come back?

 _Then you would have nothing keeping you here,_ the thought raced across her mind.

 _No, you will not think like that,_ she scolded herself.

It was true though, Draco was the only thing keeping her here. If he was gone she could go. She had a wand and no one else would be able to track her down. All Draco had to do was die.

An image of Draco lying motionless on the ground formed inside Hermione's mind and she covered her mouth trembling. She pushed the chains off her body shaking.

"No..." she said aloud. "He can't die."

Her stomach knotted and she wrapped her arms around herself. She couldn't bear the thought of him not coming back.

Her heart ached inside her chest. She rubbed her closed fist over the spot that hurt trying to dull the ache.

What the hell was going on with her? What was wrong with her? Why did she care so much what happened to him? It was Draco Malfoy for pete sake!

 _It doesn't matter, I don't care_. _I need him._

Her hands trembled as he pulled them through her hair. Memories of Draco being tortured by the Dark Lord began playing in her head. She heard his screams echoing in her ears.

 _What if the Dark Lord had discovered the truth and that Draco was really trying to protect me?_

 _No, that isn't right,_ she told herself. _Lucius would have had a very different expression on his face if that were the case._

Would he? Wondered Hermione. _Look what he did to Draco when he was younger._

 _Who's to say it ever stopped…_

"No," Hermione shook her head. That couldn't be Draco was too strong…but…if it was all he has ever known? Hermione trembled.

The nausea wasn't going away. Hermione's mind went back to that place she had been with Draco: The one by the ocean. The one that felt weirdly connected to Draco. He had been in pain there. If he died the last interaction they would have had would be of pain. He had given her back her friend; Taken the time to nurse him back to health and all Hermione had done was yell at him, hit him and then make him feel bad.

Hermione's bottom lip trembled.

 _I don't want him to remember me that way._

 _If he dies he won't be alive to remember it._

 _But I'll remember…_

She turned and went to the washroom and showered trying to wash away the dark thoughts. She told herself that Draco would be okay, that he would come back and she would have the chance to make it up to him somehow.

 _You're going to be nice to him,_ she told herself standing under the spray. _He's not the evil Ferret he was in school, he's changed and you need to stop acting like its okay to take your shit out on him._

When she was finished with the shower Hermione sat down at the table and pulled out the Oscar Wilde set. She turned the final volume over in her hands and looked at the embossed lettering. With a sigh Hermione opened the book and forced herself to read to focus on something else.

She read through nearly a hundred pages when suddenly a pain gripped her and she felt a flood of fear through the bind.

Draco was in danger.

She had to go to him, she had to help him.

Pain gripped her chest as she felt the fear like a pulse coming from him and flowing into her.

 _Draco._

Panic flooded her system and she couldn't tell if it was from Draco or from her own heart.

She went to her pallet and grabbed the wand.

Her breath quickened she held it tight wanting to apperate to him.

How had he found her? How had he tracked her down?

All at once she felt nothing.

All the fear all the pain, everything in the Bind went quiet…cold.

She couldn't feel him anymore.

"No..." she breathed aloud.

 _He can't be dead, he's not allowed to be dead._

Suddenly the empty room felt like a prison in a way it never had before. Hermione heart pounded and her breathing increased. She felt a rushing like the ocean in her ears. Black stars clouded her vision.

 _He needs to be okay!_

"I care!" she yelled out loud to the empty room. "I care if he lives or dies! I care if he comes back!" She looked to the ceiling tears running down her face. "Draco come back to me!"

* * *

Draco was floating.

Floating in the dark.

There was no light.

There was no sound.

There was only the dark.

It was warm.

It was calm.

He didn't know how long he had been in the dark, but it was nice here.

It was peaceful and warm.

He couldn't feel his body.

There was no pain, no worry.

Nothing.

A flicker of panic reached him and it was swept away in the dark.

The world was warm and calm and black.

And the Dark was good…it wasn't really that dark anyways.

It was getting lighter.

Draco blinked…there was a light in the distance.

The light was warm too.

Warm and Welcoming.

He felt himself drawn to it.

Suddenly through the darkness he heard her voice.

It ripped through the dark with the sound of a thunderclap.

It tore through the light.

' _Draco come back to me!'_

* * *

Draco regained consciousness with a wild jolt and sucked the air into his lungs viciously.

He coughed. His lungs were burning. He tried to move and let out a yell of agony. His whole one side was burnt. Form mid arm all down his leg. His clothes were burned off on that side. The skin was red in places and black in others. Bleeding. His ribs on the opposite side were still screaming from the impact on the chair and his leg that wasn't burned was aching form where Ron's curse had hit him. His head throbbed.

He blinked and saw Nikita above him.

She was looking down at him her face lined with worry. There was a faint impression of the wound she had received in battle, but it was faded.

"I didn't think you were going to make it," she said

"What…" Draco tried to ask what happened and where they were. He started coughing violently. His throat burned. When he stopped his eyes were watering. He moved to raise his arm to wipe his face forgetting the burn. The pain was too much.

He blacked out.

* * *

When Draco came to again Snape was bent over him and Nikita was nowhere to be seen.

"When did you get here?" asked Draco. He found he could speak without bursting into a fit of coughing.

"Nikita called me."

"I'm surprised she didn't call my mother," said Draco and he looked down at his arm. It still looked like shit, but was getting better as Snape worked.

"Your mother and Nikita don't have a good history," said Snape flatly.

"Oh really?" Draco quirked a brow.

"Yes."

Snape said nothing more leaving his answer hanging in the air.

"Why?" Draco prodded.

"You can ask her if you are so inclined," said Snape. "But I wouldn't recommend it. Drink this." Snape ordered. Draco took the vial from his mentor and took it down. It tasted worse than his own concoctions and it took everything not to spit it back out.

"That is truly awful," he managed.

"You'll be thankful for it later," said Snape, "Those burns are bad."

"Alright," said Draco and he sat up. The world spun as pan ripped through his rib cage and the burned flesh with was trying to stitch itself back together. "Fuck me," Draco whimpered. It hurt too much, so fucking much.

It was almost as bad as the Sectumsempra Harry had cast on him.

"Lay back," Snape ordered pushing down on Draco's un-charred shoulder.

Draco made a sound through his teeth but laid back.

"You are well enough to live," said Snape. "Nikita said you stopped breathing."

"Did I?" Draco managed.

His mind flickered back to the dark and how it had felt…and then he thought of how he had seen the light right before Hermione's voice had cut through everything and brought him back.

 _Did I almost die for real?_ He wondered and his body went cold.

A shiver passed through him.

He remembered the dark, and...the light and then he remembered her voice. He remembered hearing Hermione call to him, remembered that it was the thing that had brought him back.

"I shouldn't heal you any more now," said Snape.

"Why the hell not?" Demanded Draco. He was in enough pain that he didn't care to be grateful for what his mentor had already done. He was laying there in agony and Snape was saying he shouldn't heal him anymore.

"Because you were assigned this mission on your own," said Snape. "If it seems like you had too much help the Dark Lord will think you incompetent."

"Nikita knows what happened, it will get back to him eventually."

"Nikita would not stop talking about what you did with that new wand of yours," said Snape with a nod. "Going back injured on your own two feet demonstrates your dedication to your lord," said Snape. "If I were to carry you back there it would make you seem weak."

"I can't even fucking sit up," protested Draco.

"It will make you seem all the more dedicated," drawled Snape. "And…" he paused. "Given how soft you are for your former classmate…" he let the sentence linger in the air.

Draco caught Snape's meaning loud and clear in the words unspoken.

"I should do everything I can to show just how dedicated I am to him," Draco finished.

"Exactly," said Snape. "You did succeed in delivering the package I trust?"

"Yes," said Draco.

"Good." Snape stood.

"I passed out after….what happened to Ron and the order?"

"What kind of a question is that to ask?" said Snape somewhat angrily.

 _Shit, phrasing, don't be an idiot,_ Draco chastised himself. _It's one thing for Snape to know you care about Hermione, it's a totally different thing for him to think that you have switched sides._

"Don't question my allegiance," said Draco putting up a front. "I don't give a fuck what happened to them," he lied. "I just want to know if I get the chance to take out my frustrations on the actual person who fucking burnt me while I was unconscious."

Draco was a little proud of the amount of anger he managed in his voice. He sounded convincing even to his own ears and clearly Snape believed him as well. He was however, not so proud of hot his head fell back from the pain of tensing his muscles enough to sound so angry.

"I am afraid you'll have to wait for that particular piece of vengeance," answered Snape.

"Fine, whatever," said Draco. "I'll wait. It's only a matter of time before the Dark Lord wins." The words sounded hollow and forced Draco's ears mostly because the dark lord winning had turned into his nightmare instead of marking the end of all the chains in his life. The Dark Lord winning would mean Draco would never be able to be with Hermione.

They would kill her once they killed Potter.

 _I won't let that happen no matter what the outcome of this war is._

"You should go home and rest," said Snape.

"Yeah," Draco rolled his eyes. "Rest."

"I need to go."

"Then go already," snapped Draco.

Snape paused and reached into his cloak pulling out a book. "The volume you requested," said Snape handing him a heavy leather book. Draco took it with his good hand feeling a sense of relief and a little guilt at being so snappy with someone who could almost be called an ally.

 _But he's not your ally. Thinking like that could get both you and Hermione killed. Keep yourself in check._

 _He just took the time to come and heal you…_ a piece of him defended his mentor.

 _It doesn't matter he's just doing that because of his vow._

 _It's a little above and beyond don't you think?_

 _That doesn't change which side he's one,_ thought Draco darkly. Snape might be helping him, and he might actualy care for his student. Those possibilities wouldn't change the fact that Snape was loyal to the Dark Lord.

"I think it would be wise to keep my involvement just between us," reiterated Snape.

"Yeah," answered Draco.

Snape turned to go.

"Thank you," blurted Draco.

His mentor turned around to face him, a strange expression on his face. He squinted his eyes at Draco and then nodded and disapperated.

Draco set the book down beside him and this time when he tried to sit he did it slowly and carefully.

"Merlin," Draco ground through is teeth and let out a whine at the pain. He picked the book back up, took hold of his wand and apperated to his front gates.

He landed sitting on the grass the jarring of the impact had pain screaming through him and darkness threatened the edge of his vision. He bit the inside of his cheek and fought the stars.

Draco rubbed his face with his good hand.

"You can do this," he told himself.

 _You have to do this._

He cast a spell sending the book up to his window ledge. He didn't have the strength to carry it and on top he didn't need anyone to know that he was planning on making passages in the house. He didn't need the dark Lord asking about what books he was reading.

Draco used his good arm to push himself up off the ground. He closed his eyes.

 _This is almost as bad as a cruciatus curse,_ he thought.

 _Yeah, except you're going to have to deal with it for days as it heals._

Draco gripped his wand tightly in his hand and apperated into his mansion, not trusting his feet to walk.

He found himself in the main hall where Voldemort was sitting waiting for him as he hadn't moved the entire time Draco had been gone. He looked smug and satisfied.

Bellatrix however, looked different. Her wild hair was just a little more messy than usual and her lipstick was smeared.

 _Oh Merlin,_ thought Draco as he realized they had likely just finished having sex. Disgust rolled through him and it took everything in Draco's power not to sneer in revolt at his aunt.

"Draco," said the Dark Lord. "You look rather ruffled," he said gesturing to Draco's disheveled appearance.

 _Understatement of the year_ , snapped Draco mentally. He gained control of his temper and spoke respectfully:

"The order showed up."

"What?!" the Dark Lord stood throwing the chair backwards. Bellatrix backed away several feet her eyes darting back and forth between the two of them wildly.

"Your package was delivered," said Draco holding up his good hand in self-defence. "And Blackthorn apperated away with it when the order arrived."

"Leaving you on your own?" The Dark Lord looked Draco up and down a second time. This time however he seemed to take Draco in, assessing him with his dark unsettling eyes. When he was finished Voldemort raised his chin.

"And here you are..." Voldemort said a smile pulling one side of his mouth upwards.

"Yes," said Draco. "A little worse for the wear, but happy to have completed the errand for you successfully my lord." Draco gave a small bow. Pain raced through him at the movement and Draco fell to his knee. He caught himself with his good hand so it seemed like a genuflection instead of just falling over. He supposed it didn't matter either way. The Dark Lord would be equally happy to see him grovel as to see him in pain.

"That's a good boy Draco," said Bellatrix her voice breathy. "I'm so proud of you."

 _I never want you to be proud of me,_ he thought back. _Not anymore, not after what you've done._

"Thank you ant Bella," he said instead.

"You should go clean up," said Voldemort. "And rest..." he smiled sending chills down Draco's spine. "Now that I know that your father's aptitude for failure has not been passed down to you, I plan on sending you out on more errands."

"You honor me, my lord," Draco said finding the strength to push himself back up into a standing position while every part of him screamed in agony. The Dark Lord smiled and Bellatrix eased towards him like a cat draping herself across his shoulder.

Draco left apperating to his room before anything could start.

* * *

 _He's not dead._

 _He can't be dead._

 _He is not allowed to be dead._

As Hermione paced the room she convinced herself of it over and over.

An image of Ron popped into her head.

 _What would he think of you knowing you've developed feelings for a Malfoy?_

 _I don't have feelings for him,_ Hermione shot back.

"Oh really," she answered herself out loud. "That's why you were shouting at the ceiling for him to come back to you." Her voice was venomous and judgemental even to her own ears.

Hermione let out a growl of frustration and lashed out with the wand in hand. The pillow by her bed exploded in a puff of white sending feathers dancing through the air.

She loved Ron.

But she had never felt this way about Ron.

It was like her whole world revolved around whether or not Draco made it home alive.

 _That's because you have feelings for him._

"No I don't" she said blowing off a feather that had landed on the tip of her nose. "I do not have feelings for Draco Malfoy," she said out loud. Silence greeted her as an answer. She crossed her arms over her chest and looked in the mirror. Little white feathers had alighted all in her hair making it, from a distance, look almost like she had been caught out in the snow.

 _It's only that he is your only link to the real world,_ she told her reflection, trying to will herself to believe it.

She didn't want to have feelings for Draco.

She didn't even want to admit to herself that she had feelings for him.

 _But you do have feelings for him...admit it._

"Fine, I admit it," she said out loud. A tear rolled down her cheek. "But it doesn't matter because-"

She heard a small thump at the windowsill startled Hermione stopping her mid sentance. She went over unlatching the window and opening it. There was an old leather volume there. She picked it up and brought it inside turning it over so that she could read the cover.

"Doors and their various uses," she read aloud. "Well that sounds...rather dull actually. What on earth is this doing here?" she frowned.

A feather from her hair dropped on the book and she brushed it aside and went back over to the mirror trying to pull each one out. There were at least a dozen if not more snagged and hiding in the nest of her curly hair.

She caught her own gaze in the mirror and her hands froze.

 _Even if you did have feelings for him, he would never return them,_ she told herself.

 _You're a mudblood he's a pureblood and despite everything he's done for you, that hasn't changed._

She looked away angrily from her own reflection and lashed out again with the wand. A second pillow fell prey to her attack exploding in a white flurry that danced around the room.

There was a loud thump behind her and a groan of pain.

Hermione leapt behind the bed ducking out of sight as little white feathers floated through the air.

"Hermione?"

Hermione popped up to see Draco waver on his feet. He was looking at the room and she realized how ridiculous it must look.

"What the hell happened in here?" he asked. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she said and ran over to him. The flood of relief shooting through her washed away her previous dark thoughts.

He was alive. He had come back. That was all that mattered.

She threw her arms around him.

 _I'm so glad you're alive._

Draco cried out in pain and dropped to his knees.

"You're hurt!" Hermione pulled back and now that the feathers had settled she could see the burns on his arm and legs on the one side of his body, his Blond hair was matted on the side and back with blood.

 _oh my God..._

"Yes...well that happens when people try to kill you," he said and leaned back letting himself slide down onto the floor.

"I need to help you, tell me what to do. Where are your potions?"

She was frantic.

There was a strange look on Draco's face and he smiled.

"Thanks for caring," he said softly. He blinked and then his eyes darted up to her hair. He reached up with his good hand and plucked a feather from off her shoulder.

"Really Granger, what did my pillows ever do to you?"

"I…" she pursed her lips at him and then she realized he was trying to make light of the situation.

Draco never made light of the situation that was the kind of thing Fred or George would do, not Draco Malfoy.

"Nothing," she said and waved her wand. The feathers rushed back together stitching themselves up inside the pillows.

She felt a tugging in her hair.

"Ouch."

"Hold on a second," said Draco and he reached up gently into her hair and pulled out a feather. "There," he said letting it go. He smiled up at her and Hermione looked down at his beautiful clear eyes. Draco touched her hair gently smoothing it out. A warmth crept through her at his touch.

 _He's so…wonderful,_ she thought. _After all this and hurt as he is, he just tried to make me feel better._ She knew in her heart of hearts that was what his comment about the pillows had been. It was so unlike him and the only reason he would say something so out of character was to make her feel better.

 _Why does he have to be like that?_ She found herself thinking. If he was cold or cruel or distant it would be so much easier to separate herself from him.

 _Maybe he has real feelings for you too…You already know he cares…_

 _Don't be stupid,_ she scolded herself.

"There is a book by the window," said Draco clearing his throat and Hermione realized just how long the silence had stretched between them while she thought.

"Yes," answered Hermione.

"Can you tuck it away please?"

"Of course," said Hermione. She got up and went over the book. "Where do you want it?"

"Underneath my nightstand should be fine," said Draco and she saw him crunch his eyes tightly together.

"What do you need it for anyways?" asked Hermione.

"I want to learn a new piece of magic," he answered not looking over at her.

"For doors?" she asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes for doors," said Draco. "For a fellow bibliophile you sure are judgemental."

Hermione giggled.

"Sorry."

The door handle jostled. Draco shot Hermione a look and she darted over to the chains looping them around her body and sitting down on the pallet.

Narcissa burst in.

"DRACO!" she ran over to him and fell down on her knees. "Draco my baby, please be okay."

"I'll be okay mother," said Draco.

"What happened?" she asked. "I never should have let you go out there on your own I should have come with you or sent Snape with you or…or"

"You couldn't have," said Draco.

Narcissa's hands fluttered over Draco trembling above the burns.

"So much pain…" Hermione watched as a single tear fell from Narcissa's eye. She wiped it away aggressively and then stood and waved her wand. She levitated Draco over to the bed and lay him down.

It was then that she seemed to see Hermione there for the first time. Her eyes flicked over Hermione.

"She shouldn't be here when you are weak," said Narcissa. "She is a danger to you."

"She's fine," said Draco.

Narcissa shook her head, obviously to preoccupied with Draco to care overmuch, and went back to caring for Him. She was quick and efficient and Hermione saw her cast healing spells one after another in quick succession. If she didn't dislike the woman so much Granger would have been impressed.

"What happened?" asked Narcissa and Hermione was happy the question had been voiced. She wanted to know what had happened to Draco that he was so hurt.

"The Dark Lord sent me to deliver a package as you know," said Draco. "And then the order showed up."

"The order?" Hermione's head snapped to his face. "Who? Are they okay?"

"I didn't kill anyone if that's what you're asking," said Draco sneering.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"Silencio," cast Narcissa. "You keep your mouth shut. This conversation has nothing to do with you." Hermione opened her mouth to protest, knowing it would make her feel better even if there was no sound. "If you even think of mouthing something vulgar my way I will have you down in the cellar in a heartbeat. You may be Draco's responsibility but this is still my house. If you want the privilege of staying here in what little comfort provided you will shut your mouth."

Hermione shut her mouth with a snap.

Not because she was worried: Because she didn't want to leave Draco alone.

Narcissa seemed satisfied and she turned back to her son.

"Who was there?"

"It doesn't matter," said Draco. "What matters is that the package was delivered and I made it back alive."

"Yes," Narcissa smoothed a hand over her son's hair. "I am so glad you are alive my boy," Narcissa bent down and kissed his forehead. "I am so glad you are alive."

"Cissy?" Bellatrix voice came from the doorway.

"What is it?" asked Narcissa turning towards her sister.

"He wants to know when dinner is…" said Bellatrix scraping a nail down the doorframe. "He worked up quite an appetite this afternoon and is hungry."

"I am tending to my son."

"Draco's a big boy Cissy," said Bellatrix. "He's fine aren't you my darling."

"Yes," said Draco. "I'm fine mother. I'll be fine. I just need to sleep."

"See, I told you so," said Bellatrix.

Narcissa took a deep breath and stood reagally.

"Very well. I shant keep him waiting then," she looked down at Draco. "You call me immediately if you need anything."

"I will," said Draco. " I promise."

"Good," said Narcissa and she turned to Hermione. "If you try anything or harm my son it will be the last thing you ever do. Do you understand?"

Hermione nodded slightly chilled by how cold Narcissa had turned in the matter of a few seconds. It was clear that Draco was above all els in Narcissa's mind.

"Good," with that Narcissa turned and followed Bellatrix out of the room closing the door softly behind her.

* * *

As soon as the door closed Draco turned his head towards Hermione in time to see her leaving the chains behind. He watched her crawl up on to the bed next to him and settle down cross legged.

"I'm sorry for how she is to you," said Draco. He was so tired he could barely keep his eyes open.

He saw her mouth the words 'its okay'

"Will you stay with me tonight?" he asked.

It was the first time that he had reached out to Hermione for her support instead of being there and being strong for her.

She didn't hesitate only nodded.

"Thank you," he said and closed his eyes for a moment before looking at her. Their eyes met and locked for a moment and all Draco wanted to do was kiss her. He was sure a kiss would make it better. However he couldn't bring himself to ask for something like that. He had already taken the risk of reaching out and asking for her to stay.

 _And she agreed..._

Hermione gave a small smle crawled delicately over him and lay down beside him on the side that wasn't burned. True the wounds were all closed, but that didn't change the fact that everything was still tender.

Draco closed his eyes and taking another leap he turned his hand outward...towards her.

There was only a moment's pause before he felt her slip her fingers in to his.

* * *

 **No Cliffhanger this time, only sweetness. Hope you liked the chapter. If you did please review and let me know. Thanks so much and have an awesome day.**

 **Ps. If you are bored and want to check out some alternative versions of scenes from this story pop over and go have a read of "Dreams and Love Scenes" I've got one short story there I am thinking of turning into a full blown fanfiction and I'd love to know if you would enjoy reading it. Cheers**


	34. Chapter 32: The Black

**A big thank you to everyone who took the time to review since last chapter:** RotcehM, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Toraach, LillsBills, Ayr , AnayaR , mmiller0000 , mega700201, .babem, Aikello, ChildofBrisingr, Jen7 , alluringmango , Aid4, Iwillsingyoulullabys guests "D" and "Who"

 **Hope you enjoy the chapter, if you do let me know. If I feel the love I may try and sneak an extra update-but I do have family in form the Netherlands so I can't promise anything.**

 **This section, and the time at the Malfoy Mannor, will be ending very soon. I hope you enjoy where it goes from here. Things are about to get...complicated. I tried to shorten this chapter down and just double it with the next one so that we could move on with the plot. That did not happen. I wanted the dreams for both of them and I think you all might like Hermiones dream-I enjoyed writing it. This chapter is probably going to be the longest chapter of the whole fanfiction. It clocks in at just 30 words short of 8k...yup. hopefully you enjoy.**

* * *

Chapter 32: The Black

Draco knew he was dreaming because the last thing he remembered was holding Hermione's hand before he fell asleep.

He was standing a perfectly cubed all white room. There was nothing but the blank walls and ceiling staring back at him. He spun looking for any kind of a door or way out.

"Hello?" he called. There was no answer.

Suddenly his leg started to hurt and from the place where Ron had cursed him leaked out a black liquid. It pooled on the floor and then began to rise from the center of the pool in a writhing mass that grew and grew.

Draco tried to back away and nearly fell.

He looked down and found his feet would not move. He was stuck firmly in place by the black muck which was slowly crawling up his limbs. Each tendril that slid upwards felt cold and slimy and send chills through his flesh. The dark Mark on his arm began to grow and the snake rose up off of his skin. He felt it tear out and through his flesh and it burned with a hot fury. Soon it was twice Draco's height. The snake hissed at the black ooze. The black lashed out and struck the snake latching on to the living mark with long black fangs. The dark began to drink in heavy pulses, sucking at the snake like an oozing black leech. The Snake writhed and hissed and Draco raised his hands to cover his ears and froze.

His hands were so thin.

He looked up at his arms and watched as all the muscle in his forearms slowly began to atrophy. He tried to call out, but his voice made no sound.

A mirror appeared before him and Draco watched in mute horror as his body slowly faded before his very eyes. Soon he was nothing more than a skeleton. The last things to vanish were his eyes as he crumpled to the ground in a pile of bones.

Draco woke with a start and sat up. Pain lanced through him at the motion. The burns were almost healed, his ribs felt better, but jolting upright into a sitting position still hurt like a bitch. Draco took a moment to just steady his breath and get a handle on the pain.

First light was peaking through the windows colouring the room in a soft pink and yellow glow.

 _It was just a dream_ , Draco told himself.

it had felt so real and so terrifying. Draco reached over to his arm and covered the dark mark with his hand. It felt oddly warm which made Draco feel cold.

Draco looked over to see Hermione shivering in her sleep. She arched against the bed as if in pain and let out a moan. He reached out and touched her and her eyes flew open, her back arching right of the bed and she gasped. Then then convulsed.

"Hermione!" he grabbed hold of her afraid that she would fall off the side of the bed.

* * *

Hermione was back at Hogwarts, it was spring and the birds were chirping and students strolled to and fro along the halls and across the green courtyard. The hustle and bustle of the students around her and the familiar feeling of the safety the stone walls always provided made her shoulders ease down.

She knew it was a dream. It didn't matter. Even in a dream Hogwarts felt like safety; it felt like home.

Hermione smiled and closed her eyes, she tilted her head back letting out a sigh of relief.

"Thinking of me?" a teasing male voice came from behind her and Hermione snapper her head forward and turned to see Draco leaning against a stone pillar nonchalantly and smiling with a cocky grin that she hadn't seen in ages. A part of her missed the cocky attitude, a small part. She much preferred the Draco she got to see and spend time with now.

However she wished she could see him like this, outside his house and hell that the manor represented. Draco looked polished and relaxed. His pants were fresh pressed, his shirt devoid of any wrinkles. His shoes shone as he stepped towards her.

"What?" she blushed. "No. Why would you think that?" he looked achingly dashing. Those pants showed off his long legs and the white dress shirt rolled up to his elbows showed off his forearms. His Slytherin tie was just slightly lose and askew making him look the part of the well-dressed, rich, bad-boy.

"Then why were you sighing like that?" he asked sauntering over.

"Because I am happy to be back at Hogwarts," she almost stammered the words.

He was well within her personal space now, circling her and making her want to reach out and touch him. He was so lovely and tall. She caught a whiff of his cologne and inhaled deeply. He smelled so good.

"Such a sweet little book nerd," he whispered to her picking up a curl of her hair in his hand and twirling it around his finger as he slipped behind her.

"Draco..." she breathed his name.

"Yes?" he asked, a smile twitching at his lips as he came round her other side.

"What are you doing?" she almost squeaked craning her head to look at him. He stopped so that they were facing one another head on and reached down between them taking the books from her arms setting them on the stone bench beside them.

He stepped forward one foot at a time, while Hermione back up until she pressing her back against the closest pillar with only the smallest space between them.

"What do you want me to do?" he asked his eyes were molten heat.

"I..." Hermione lost her ability to speak. There were a million things she wanted and none of them were things she dared say out loud even in a dream.

Draco raised his hands slowly to her sides and ran them gently up from her hips to her waist. He paused for a moment watching her intently then turned them over so that his knuckles brushed the front of her blouse grazing over her breasts.

She felt nipples harden in response and her knees buckled. Quick as lightning he caught her holding her up against the pillar. She found herself suddenly surrounded by his warmth and heat.

"Going a little weak in the knees?" he asked his mouth at her ear. She could feel his hot breath against her skin and she shivered. Her pulse quickened.

"I'm not," she protested and tried to regain her balance only to realize that his hard thigh was wedged directly between her legs holding her up against the pillar and effectively trapping her against him. She squirmed, the motion creating friction against her clit with his thigh. She immediately froze as the pleasure from that action had her almost choking on her own tongue.

 _Draco_ , her mind sighed his name. She wanted this... but she wasn't supposed to.

"Whats the matter luv?" he asked and she felt his mouth drop to her neck. His voice had taken on the sexiest quality, it moved through her like velvet.

"You...me...we can't."

"Sure we can," he answered. "There's no one else around."

Hermione looked around to see that the halls were now empty leaving just the two of them standing alone together pressed close.

"But..." her protests were cut off when he circled his hips and pressed his hard thigh expertly against her center. "Uhnnnghhh."

"That's a good girl." He reached up to cup her breast through her clothing and Hermione moaned her hips bucking against his leg.

"Draco." Why wouldn't he touch her like this...she closed her eyes.

"Yes?" He tweaked her nipple and her eyes shot open as she bucked again. Hermione forgot what she was going to say.

Draco shifted their positions using one arm to lift and hold her so that he could press the hardness in his slacks against the aching apex of her thighs. He laced the other hand with hers, their fingers intertwining. For a moment she caught a glimpse of the tenderness he shared with her when no one else is around. He bent his head down and brushed his lips against hers in the same way she had dreamed just a few nights before. Her heart ached.

"There's nothing I won't do for you Hermione," he said and kissed her neck. "I'd slay any dragon, face any monster."

He squeezed her hand tight and began to slowly grind against her.

"Anything," he said looking in her eyes. "Ask me for anything Granger and its yours."

Heat flooded Hermione's system. Desire began to override everything else. Once again Draco's mouth went to her neck, this time sucking on the flesh there.

"I want you," she stammered. "I want to cum."

"Then cum for me Granger." he growled in her ear and circled her clit again kissing her neck. "Cum for me"

Hermione's back arched.

* * *

Draco held on to Hermione as she let out a pained sound and curled in on herself.

"Hermione are you okay?" Worry gnawed at him.

"Don't," she ordered and turned her face into the pillow "Don't."

Draco let go. Her body shuddered. He looked at her trembling form and felt powerless. He had thought things were better between them.

 _You're the reason she has nightmares._

 _Its your fault._

Hermione turned her face upwards and rolled out flat on her back. She seemed to try and take a moment to rein something in and she trembled and sucked in air before she could finally turned her head and looked at him. When she did she looked away as if meeting his gaze was too much.

 _She had a nightmare about you and what you've done to her that's why she can't look at you._

 _Her back bowed like it did with a_ cruciatus _curse._

Draco ran and hand through his hair feeling the dried blood caked on the strands. His scalp burned at the motion.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, not knowing what else to say.

Her head shot up and her eyes locked with his.

"For what?" she demanded.

"For being the reason you have nightmares."

A flurry of emotions rushed across Hermione's face and she reached out a hand to touch him and then hesitated.

 _Too kind to hate me for it, to hurt by what I've done to touch me so close to a nightmare._

Draco felt like he had shards of glass in his heart. Breathing hurt.

"Could you get me a glass of water?" she finally asked.

"Of course," Draco got out of bed, happy for the excuse to do something and get away. He was careful not to touch her in the process.

His calf throbbed as soon as he put pressure on it.

As soon as he was in the bathroom he pulled up his pant leg. There was a black mark from where Ron's curse had hit and a series of small black tendrils were spread out from the center exactly like in his dream. Fear gripped Draco sending ice down the back of his neck.

"That doesn't look good," murmured Draco. He touched the mark and then winced. The flesh around it was slightly pink, tender and warm to the touch, like an inflamed or infected wound. "What the hell did you do to me Weasel?" Draco asked looking down. He looked in the mirror. His hair was still red with blood. He would need to scourgify his blankets and pillowcases.

Draco went over to the bath and ran some water that was exactly room temperature. He let the tub fill as he brought out a glass of water for Hermione.

She was sitting up in bed waiting for him when he returned.

She wouldn't meet his eyes when she took the water from him. Her cheeks were tinged pink.

"I don't blame you," she said without looking up. "If I have a nightmare..."

"Well I blame me," said Draco flatly. She didn't respond and so he went back to the washroom. As soon as he closed the door he slammed the side of his fist against the tile.

"Fuck." He closed his eyes and leaned back against the tile wishing he was anywhere else, wishing Hermione was anywhere else. He wanted her forever. He wanted to hold her to kiss her and to fall asleep next to her.

At the same time he wished they had never met because then she would only hate him for being a prick, not for all the things he had done since.

He waved off the tap on the tub and put in some epson salts to cleanse the wound. Magic was good, salt always helped.

Stripping down he stepped in to the tub to soak. The salt hurt the leg without affecting anything else. All the burns were closed and faded from his mothers work. The skin was still pink but there was nothing that would be damaged by the salt. He relaxed for a moment and then thoughts of Hermione entered his head.

 _She was having a nightmare laying right next to you and its your fault._

 _She said she doesn't blame you._

 _That doesn't change that its you're fault._

He dunked his head underwater holding his breath. He counted the seconds holding his breath until his lungs burned. It made things feel better.

When he surfaced he heard a knock at the door.

"Draco are you okay?" Hermione's voice came through to him. She sounded worried.

"I'm fine," Draco called back. Trust her to be worried about him. He would have stayed to comfort her after the nightmare if she had asked, but she had told him not to touch her and yet here she was checking up to make sure he was okay.

 _There is a reason you are in love with her,_ his mind pointed.

 _There are a thousand_ , he answered back.

"Can I come in?" she asked, letting the question hang.

Draco hesitated.

He felt raw.

He wanted to be alone.

 _She might need you..._

That was all it took, the chance that she might need him made him set aside wanting to be alone. He cast a quick spell turning the water white so that nothing could be seen. The last thing that he wanted was for her to feel uncomfortable.

"Yes," he answered.

* * *

Hermione, breathed a sigh of relief that he was letting her in.

How could she explain to him that she wasn't having a nightmare about him, without also having to explain that she had been dreaming about him...in a very different way. A way that had made her look like an idiot. She was embarrassed and incredibly grateful that he hadn't realized what had actually happened. At the same time she hated that he was hating himself again for no reason.

She took one step inside and froze.

Draco was naked in the bath.

Fresh heat pooled at her core and she felt it throb with the desire to be touched.

 _Fuck_ , she cursed inwardly.

Seeing him this way right after her dream hit Hermione about a thousand time harder than she felt it should have. Her breath caught in her throat and against her will she found herself following down the lines of his torso into the water. When she saw he had turned the water opaque her shoulders relaxed and then her heart squeezed.

 _He did that for you, so you would feel more comfortable._

She came in and sat down on the chaise near the sink a few feet away from him.

"How are you feeling?" she asked concerned.

"I'm feeling better," he answered and she knew it was an honest answer, but an answer to how he was feeling physically not how he was feeling emotionally. She could see a storm in his eyes and she wanted so much to be able to reach out and comfort him.

He had asked for her to stay last night and he had reached for her and it had meant everything to her that he had trusted her like that-that he trusted and cared for her enough to reach out. Hermione was smart enough to know that Draco didn't do that. He wasn't the kind of guy to reach out and ask for help, he was to cocky and prideful. She knew, on some level, his reaching out and trusting her was the reason why she had dreamed of him the way she had. A piece of her walls had crumbled because had had chosen to trust her.

"I'm glad," she managed a small smile.

 _You shouldn't push him now or he might not open up to you again._

"Draco..." she found herself saying his name anyways.

"Yes?"

Hermione bit her lips.

 _Now you've started, you have to say something._

"I..." she looked away.

"What?"

"Nothing," she lied.

"Please don't do that," said Draco and she heard the slightest edge of frustration in his voice. "What do you want to say?"

Hermione wracked her brain to come up with something.

If you don't say something he'll spend the rest of the night stressing over what you might have said. Come up with something.

"Can you please tell me if my friends are okay?"

She watched as his face twisted into a pained scowl.

"Please Draco, please tell me what happened." she reached out and grabbed his hand which was on the edge of the tub. Draco looked down at her hand on his and he pulled it away.

"Your friends were all alive last I saw," said Draco looking away angrily.

"Please tell me what happened. Were any of them badly hurt? Was Harry there? Was Ron?"

"What the hell do you want to know?" Draco snapped at her. He scowled and grabbed his towel from the side and dragged it into the water wrapping it soaking wet around his body so that he could get out of the tub without showing off anything. Hermione averted her eyes as he got up regardless.

Draco marched past her dripping wet and stormed over to where he kept other towels grabbing a dry one. He swapped the wet one out letting it slap against the floor as he tied the dry one around his narrow hips.

Hermione couldn't understand why Draco was suddenly so angry.

"Why are you so upset at me asking?" she stood and face him.

Draco whirled on her.

"They beat me and burned me and left me to fucking die and I almost did died, but I'm sure they're fine," said Draco with a bite.

"Draco," Hermione got up and moved over to him.

Her chest hurt.

How could he not know that she cared for him too? Her asking about her friends didn't mean she didn't care what had happened to him. It had made her want to cry seeing him so hurt-knowing he had almost died had almost killed her. She remembered yelling at the ceiling; remembered how terrifying it had been when she could not longer feel him through the bind.

"I didn't mean it like that. You know I care, you know I'm happy your came back alive."

"Are you?" he demanded. "Wouldn't you rather I just fucking die so you'd be free of me?"

"No!"

"Right, because then you'd have try and figure out how to find Fred without me and we all know that you would do anything for your friends."

"This isn't about Fred!" yelled Hermione.

"Get out," said Draco shaking his head.

"No, not until you tell me why the hell me asking after my friends has made you so upset."

"Because they matter to you!"

"They are my friends," said Hermione vehemently. "They are supposed to matter to me!"

"I KNOW!" yelled Draco.

"Then why the hell are you mad about it?"

"BECAUSE I DON'T!"

Hermione froze.

"What did you just say?" she asked, he voice barely above a whisper.

"Forget it," said Draco shaking his head. "It doesn't matter."

Hermione heard the unspoken 'I don't matter' which so clearly was what he was implying.

"Oh yes it does," said Hermione finally catching her bearings from what Draco was saying. She grabbed his arm and Draco hissed at the pressure because she had forgotten for a moment and grabbed him where he had been burned.

Draco yanked back with a a scowl, his other shoulder bumped against the white tile of the wall.

"Oh God, I'm sorry Draco I didn't mean-"

"Just go," he cut her off.

"No," she protested firmly shaking her head.

She couldn't leave him like this. She couldn't leave him thinking that he was the reason she had a nightmare and that she didn't care

"Fucking go!" Draco yelled and Hermione heard his voice crack.

"You said that you don't matter to me. That is not true."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm your ticket out and your a good person and I 'matter'" He made quotations in the air. "As a human being." he shook his head. "You're fine Granger, I'm not judging you, you don't have to defend yourself."

"I'm not defending myself I'm defending you. You idiot" she shoved at his chest on the good side. "I care about you! You great pompous git!"

"Yeah," Draco rolled his eyes. "You care about me like you care about a god-damn stray dog."

"bullshit!"

"Its true!" Draco pushed off the wall towards her and she saw him wobble and blink.

Hermione reached out and caught him as his legs gave way.

Almost his whole weight went on her in and instant and he groaned.

"Toilet," he managed and she moved out of the way and Draco fell to his knees by the toilet and puked.

* * *

Draco shuddered.

His leg was throbbing in time with his pulse and the contents of his stomach had an eerie black to them. He flushed the toilet quickly before Hermione could see. For a moment he rested his arm against the side of the toilet and his head on his arm. The Porcelain felt cool.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you sick. I should have stopped this as soon as we started fighting."

"This isn't on you Granger," said Draco. "I picked the fight," he shuddered feeling cold.

"You look pale." she stated. "I think we should get you back to bed."

Draco was too tired to argue. When they were out in the bedroom he grabbed a pair of pants and Hermione turned around so he could pull them on. He climbed into bed. His head pounding.

"Reamus and Tonks and Ron were all there," said Draco without looking at her. She had stayed with him and she deserved to know about her friends "They wanted me to go with them," he continued. "Except for Ron who wanted to kill me."

"Ron wouldn't kill you, he's not like that," protested Hermione.

"Yeah, well he told me he was going to kill me and he threw a fireball at my head so I think you might be wrong about that one," Draco closed his eyes and sighed "We fought. I didn't kill or maim anyone and last I saw before I passed out everyone was okay."

"So Ron is the reason you were so badly burned?" he noticed a change in her voice.

"I don't know," Draco shook his head. "I passed out and when I came too the burns were there."

"I'm sorry."

"Its not your fault so don't apologize."

A knock came at the door putting a stop to their conversation. Draco glanced at the window, the sun was fully risen and Draco knew before she called that it was his mother at the door.

Hermione moved away and wrapped the chain around her and sat on the pallet.

"Come in," called Draco and then coughed.

Narcissa entered with grace. Her head was high and her hair perfect. A tray of food was floating behind her.

"How are you feeling my darling?" she asked.

"Better than before. You did a great job on the burns thank you mother."

"Of course sweetheart," She came and sat on the bed. She touched his forehead. "You're warm and damp."

"I just had a bath," said Draco.

"You shouldn't do something like that on your own before you are certain you are well enough," she chided.

"I'm fine mother," said Draco gently. "but thank you for the concern."

Narsissa closed the door with her wand.

"You can take off those silly chains now," said Narcissa directing her words at Hermione.

Draco was surprised to know his mother knew they were just for show. Hermione seemed surprised as well.

"Oh come now," she said looking at both of them. "Its entirely improbable that you have spent the last 3 weeks in chains that thick." she turned to Draco. "The chain round the ankle I believed."

"She's still my prisoner."

"Of that I am aware," said Narcissa. "But I am not a fool. For some reason you care about whether your old classmate lives or dies. Surprising considering what you endured because of her."

Draco winced.

His mother didn't know about the beatings, she never had always scolded Lucius even when it was just a backhand. She would have stopped them had she known, Draco knew that, but a part of him had been so ashamed... Draco swallowed. Narcissa that Hermione was the reason why things were so strained between Lucius. Her comment stung. He knew that while she had never voiced it his mother agreed with his father in believing it was shameful that he had come in second to a mudblood.

"And you," Narcissa looked Hermione up and down and Draco felt a flicker of fear. "Here," she handed Hermione a hard boiled egg and a scone.

Draco was so shocked he was surprised that his eyes didn't fall right out of his head. His mother was being...decent to Hermione. Narcissa cast a spell and a big pair of ear muffs settled themselves over Hermione's head. Hermione tried to remove them and Draco saw the moment she realize it was hopeless. Hermione let out a sigh and went over to the window seat and began to eat.

Draco turned back to his mother.

"Why hasn't she tried to kill you given what you did?" demanded Narcissa. "What else have you done to her?"

"Nothing," answered Draco.

"Don't lie to me."

"I haven't hurt her."

Narcissa snorted and buttered Draco's toast handing it to him. Draco accepted it even though his stomach felt far from ready for food.

"You asked me to be better," said Draco. "I'm trying."

"Don't get yourself killed in the process," scowled Narcissa and nodded towards the food. "You need to eat."

Draco obediently nibbled on the toast.

"The Dark Lord at least seems please with you," said Narcissa.

"Good," said Draco flatly.

Narcissa sighed.

"Is she in love with you?"

Draco choked the bread.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Language," Narcissa handed him a drink of water.

"No she's not in love with me," Draco shook his head. "Her type is redheaded Pratt's," Draco winced in pain and Narcissa took his hand "She's a good person mother," he added more softly.

Narcissa pulled her hand back.

"Are you in love with her?"

"I said she was a good person not that she was a pure blooded wizard I wanted to marry," sneered Draco putting up a front. It killed him to lie to his mother but he knew how she felt about marring outside of 'their kind'

"Good," said Narcissa.

Whether it was because she genuinely believed his words, or simply that she didn't want to see the truth Narcissa accepted what Draco said at face value.

"Even if she is pretty it would never work," said Narcissa. "You understand. She's not like us, she wouldn't understand the traditions-what it takes to be a Malfoy. She wouldn't be happy with you Draco, not in the long run and you would grow tired of trying to accommodating straddling her muggle world and ours."

"I do understand," said Draco "But that's not an issue as she and I will never be with one another romantically."

 _Even if its all I could ever want._

 _I would never grow tired of being with her,_ he added mentally. He didn't really want anything to do with the muggle world and yet...it was her world so a little piece of him had grown curious about just what it was like to live in a world without magic.

"Good," Narcissa seemed satisfied. "You know I only say these things because I love you and I want what is best for you."

"I know you do mother," answered Draco and he did know it. His mothers view might be wrong, but that did not change the fact that she at least believed she was doing what was right and best for him. Narcissa touched his cheek and leaned forward kissing his head.

"You just rest and eat. I'll come back in a few hours and bring you something for lunch."

"Thank you, can you set this aside for now though I think I need to sleep some more. I will eat though I promise."

"Very well," Narcissa levitated the meal and put it on the side table then cast a charm to keep it warm. Just before leaving she removed the spell from Hermione and the earmuffs vanished.

"I'm going to rest," said Draco. "When I wake up again I'll take you to see Fred."

"Thank you. Can we bring him some food?"

"He can have most of what's there," Draco gestured to the food his mother had brought for him. "Even if I was hungry its a lot of food."

"You should eat Draco, you need nourishment to get better."

He could hear the concern in her voice.

"I'll be fine. I 'll eat the orange when I wake up," he said and lifted up the covers crawling underneath. He was asleep as soon as his head hit pillow.

* * *

Draco dreamed about the darkness again, and the snake only this time they both turned on him and ate him piece by piece.

He woke sweating and shaking.

"Are you alright?" asked Hermione looking over at him.

"Fine," Draco croaked and reached for a glass of water. He downed it and rubbed his face. Taking a deep breath he swung himself out of bed and went over to the closet and grabbed real clothes for the day.

"How long was I out for?" he asked.

"An hour, maybe an hour and a half."

"Good, " said Draco. "That means you'll have some real time with Fred." He held out his hand and Hermione came to him placing it in his. He looked in her eyes. She didn't seem mad about this mornings conversation and how it had gone. It seemed she had forgiven him already.

 _Just another reason why you will never deserve her. She's too damn kind._

"Close your eyes," said Draco and Hermione obeyed.

Draco led her over to the wardrobe opening it. He said the incantation, only this time he said it loud enough that she could hear. He watched her eyebrows quirk and knew she had heard it. Then with a flick of his wand he brought the tray his mother had made for him over and had it float behind them. It was warm and fresh and beautiful inside the oasis and Draco felt the call to have a swim.

Later, he told himself.

"Well hello there," said Fred. "I was beginning to believe you two had forgotten all about me," he sighed. "I was slightly devastated."

"I could never forget you," said Hermione.

Fred glanced at Draco.

"You alright mate?" Fred frowned. "You look like shit."

"Thank you for that," said Draco sarcastically. "And on that note, here is my breakfast which I am sacrificing so you can eat."

Fred looked at Hermione and Hermione gave a nod. Fred raised his eyebrow.

"Since when does Draco Malfoy-"Started Fred and Hermione cut him off.

"He's changed," she said giving Fred a look. "Now say thank you and enjoy your meal," she ordered in a very motherly manner. Fred gave her a little salute threw a thanks at Draco and dug into the food.

Hermione picked up the orange and brought it over to Draco. "You said you would eat this," she handed it to him. "Eat."

Draco smiled at the one word command.

* * *

Hermione didn't like how pale Draco was looking. Fred was right, he did look like shit.

Fred was also right that it wasn't like Draco to sacrifice for others.

 _He's done it for you..._

Hermione looked at Draco as he slowly peeled the orange and popped a slice into his mouth. He gave it several bites and then swallowed.

"I'll leave you two to it," said Draco. "You probably want to catch up without me around. I've some reading to do anyways," he gave Hermione a tight smile and ate another wedge of the orange before setting it down on the end table and leaving the room. He didn't quite close the door behind him.

Hermione turned to Fred.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine actually," said Fred digging into the food. "Well enough to leave actually I think."

"Well that's good news," she said with a smile. Fred looked at her.

"I don't know if I can though."

"Why not? Draco will help you get out."

"I don't know if I can just leave you behind," said Fred and he reached for Hermione's hand. "I saw the picture Hermione. I can't leave knowing that could happen again."

"Oh Fred," Hermione crawled up and hugged him.

"I don't...I can't handle knowing it might happen again," he buried his face in her shoulder. "It never should have happened in the first place. We should have come for you sooner."

"You didn't know Fred, and it wasn't your call. It wasn't your fault."

"But if I leave this time it will me."

Hermione pulled back.

"No it won't," she shook her head. "You are our chance out of here. You are the way. You Fred. You can save us."

"Us?"

Hermione realized what she had said and how it must sound to Fred.

"He's...he deserves to be saved too Fred. But he wasn't lying when he said it was the only way."

"He has my wand here, somewhere. If you can find it we can just take him prisoner with us and keep him safe that way."

"You-know-who will kill his whole family if you do that," said Hermione. "And torture them first."

"They chose sides Hermione."

"Yes, but Draco chose too. He saved me Fred, risked everything. If we take him and his mother dies he will never forgive me and I will never forgive myself. I owe him Fred. I owe him for my life and for yours."

Fred seemed to consider.

"Alright," he nodded. "No, you're right. It feels strange as hell but you're right. If what you're both saying is true then we both owe him our lives." Fred frowned. "He really gave up his breakfast for me?"

"Yeah," said Hermione with a half smile. "I told you, he's changed."

"You care about him don't you?"

"I do," said Hermione.

"I never thought I would see the day where you and Malfoy got along and where...I would kinda like the kid too."

"What really?" Hermione laughed.

"Yeah," said Fred sheepishly. "He's kinda fun to tease and he has mad cooking skills. This isn't his best, but its still good."

"He didn't make that one Narcissa did."

"Well that explains it. I never pictured old skunk-hair as the kitchen-dweller type."

Hermione laughed.

"Skunk head?"

"Yeah, have you seen her hair?" Fred took a bite of his toast. "She looks like Pepe le pew's long lost human sister."

Hermione laughed until she had to hold her stomach from the force of it.

Fred smiled.

The two of them talked for a while longer about life and friends and for a little while . Then Fred talked about a match of Quiddich where one of his favourite players had almost died.

"Draco almost died last night," said Hermione softly. "I felt it through the bind." she looked up at Fred. "It scared me Fred. I don't want to loose him in this."

"Do you have feelings-feelings for him?" Fred's voice was gentle, not accusatory. Hermione looked at him and realized that he wasn't going to hate her if she said yes-even though she was supposed to be with Ron.

Hermione squirmed.

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I think I might, but I also know how stupid that is. I can't help but care if he lives or dies," she added.

"Its not stupid," said Fred. He seemed satisfied with her answer, or at least didn't want to push.

"Well then lets make sure we all live then, shall we?" he said and patted her hand.

Hermione heard a set of chimes from the other room.

"I'll be back in a minute," she told Fred and went over to the door. She opened it and stepped out into a room that was half library half bar lounge. Draco was bent over the book of doors . His face was twisted in a furrow of concentration.

"Everything alright out here?" she asked.

"Yeah, just trying to figure this out," he didn't look up at her.

"Is it very important?" she asked wondering why he looked so concerned.

Draco let out a sigh and finally looked up at her.

"I need it as a safety precaution for the two of us, so yes it is very important."

"Can I help then?" she asked.

Draco looked at her and blinked.

"Yes," he finally answered after a moment. "I could use a pair of fresh eyes and a brilliant mind," he gave her a smile.

"You're pretty clever yourself," said Hermione coming to sit beside him. He made room for her on the couch. The plush nature of the cushions had her sliding into him. She tried to stop for a moment and then gave up, enjoying the closeness. Fred's question was fresh in her mind and Hermione leaned into Draco for a moment closing her eyes.

"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice was soft and a little tentative.

"Just leaning on you for a moment," she said and turned her face into his shoulder. It felt just a little more bony than she remembered but he still smelt like heaven and felt like comfort to her. "This place is nice," she said into his shirt. "Where is it?"

"Somewhere safe," he answered and Hermione felt his arm come up and wrap around her.

Hermione sighed contentedly. There was something about knowing at least one of her friends might not loose it on her for having feelngs for Draco that made things just a little easier.

"I feel safe here with you," she said and Draco stiffened slightly.

"Hermione..." his voice was warning.

"Hush Draco, let me just enjoy feeling good for a moment"

* * *

Draco's heart felt like it would pound through his chest.

What had gotten into her?

 _Don't look a fucking gift horse in the mouth Draco,_ he told himself.

 _She's here in your arms because she wants to be, just enjoy it._

And so Draco did. He closed his eyes and he felt like the world was perfect for a moment.

It was over all too soon and Hermione sat up and picked up the book.

"Now, what exactly are you trying to do?" she asked all business.

"I need to make a door that is also a secret passageway."

"Okay, there's a spell for that right here."

"Yes, said Draco, but I need to adapt it to connect to a wall that doesn't have a door."

"Hmmm, so the first door you would tap on would be the usual and the second would be just a wall-like the walking entrance to diagon Alley."

"Exactly."

"Hmmm, okay. Give me a minute," she said scrunching up her face. "I want to read this."

"Okay."

"Could you get me some water?" she asked without looking up.

"Sure," Draco stood and felt a total head rush. He caught himself from falling with one arm on the couch when he looked up he saw Fred watching from the door. He had no doubt that the redhead had seen them sitting together, but how long had he been standing there? Draco swallowed and went over to the door closing it softly. Then he went to the sink and poured Hermione a glass of water. He brought it back and then went over to the secret compartment and tapped it pulling out a healing potion he downed it and steadied himself against the counter.

"I'm going to pop outside for a moment," said Draco. "Promise you'll stay in here."

"Mmmhmm," Hermione nodded not looking up at him.

Merlin she is so adorable in bookworm mode, he thought and smiled before going outside.

The sunshine felt warm on Draco's skin, which was good because he felt oddly cold. He waved his wand and the temperature outside spiked. He stripped down to his boxers and looked down at his leg.

It looked worse.

Much worse.

"Shit," he said aloud and swallowed. Hopefully the potion would help. He dove into the water and the salt hit the wound. It burned and he felt like something was hissing at him. He swam for as long as he could before the pain in his leg became too much and he climbed out and re-dressed.

A second chime sounded as Draco was toweling his hair and he went in to see Hermione browsing his book shelves. She turned to face him when he entered.

"This place is yours isn't it?" she asked.

Draco nodded.

"I thought so," she said and turned back to the shelves. "I recognized the taste in books. Though these ones feel more personal," she caressed a leather spine gently.

Draco swallowed. The looked so beautiful standing there in his space crooning adorably over his books.

"Did you make any progress with the spell?" he asked.

"Yeah," she answered. "I think I figured it out. You'll have to try the spell yourself to be sure, but I wrote it down."

Draco walked over to the book. She had written the solution on a blank piece of parchment. It looked right.

 _Of course it looks right, she's brilliant she could fix anything._

"We should get back, my mother will bring up lunch soon and I don't want her to panic."

"Right, of course," said Hermione and she closed her eyes and held out her hand.

 _She trusts you,_ he thought.

"Wait just a moment," he said and went over to the door on the wall that he had created. He cast first half of the incantation and then came back to Hermione and took her hand.

Draco led her back into his room and closed the wardrobe.

Hermione opened her eyes and looked at Draco. She reached up and touched the side of his face.

"You look pale," she said and he heard the concern in her voice. No one else was around, he couldn't lie.

"I've been worse," he said and he gave her a half smile. He covered her hand with his own.

He wanted to kiss her.

Everything inside him screamed to kiss her.

He felt the pull to lean forward and see what she would do; see if she would meet him halfway.

The door opened and Draco stepped back from Hermione as his mother came in effectively killing the moment.

"Good, you are up and standing. Feeling better then my darling?"

"Yes, thank you." said Draco.

"I brought lunch," she smiled at Draco and then she turned to Hermione. "You have two choices, you can sit silently and join us or you can sit in the corner with no food and silencio holding your tongue."

"I will be quiet," said Hermione.

Draco prickled at his mothers tone...and at the same time...his mother would never let a mudblood eat with them. It was utterly unheard of. Narcissa created another chair and the three of them sat at the table and ate lunch. Narcissa chatted about the politics and how things were going, careful not to let any intimate details of plans go while Hermione was there. Draco stopped eating half way through his lunch.

"Are you alright?" Narcissa asked.

"Fine," answered Draco, though it was anything but true. His stomach was rolling. "I just finished the breakfast not long ago. I will eat the rest of this, this afternoon is that is alright with you mother. I think I'll lay down again for a while."

Narcissa reached out and felt his forehead.

"You're still warm."

"I did get set on fire," said Draco.

"Don't joke like that," she scolded and then her tone softened. "I'll come back later this evening to check on you."

"Thank you," said Draco.

"Thank you for lunch," said Hermione.

Narcissa turned towards the curly haired girl. She seemed to size her up and then Narcissa stood.

"Miss Granger," said Narcissa. "Its time you and I spoke...alone."

* * *

 **And that is where I leave you, I hope you enjoyed. If you did please review. If I feel the love Ill try and find the time for a double.**


	35. Chapter 33: The Last Night

**I feel like the rocky theme song is playing in the background now as I type. "Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Feeling strong now…" 500. Wow. Thank you all so much. I certainly feel the love from last chapter. Thank you to:** RotcehM, frizzy-wizzy-oringina, wickedwitch617, Fanficfan826, mmiller0000, BratGirl1983, Ambearlamb, LillsBills,Ayr, mega700201, Starearth, Aikello, .babe, lady alegria, aniani123, Toraach, MsBeast, Amblure100p **and all the people who have taken the time to review in the past.**

 **Here is your bonus update. It was supposed to be a short little chapter and instead…well…its 7k…ooops. ( I don't know how I thought at one point that I could smoosh this and last chapter together to make one…they are my two longest yet that would have just been suuuuch a run on chapter! Hopefully you like it as it is. Let me know)**

 **This chapter is dedicated to** AnayaR **Thank you so much for all the support and comments, they really mean a whole lot to me as does the fact that you've stuck around. So thank you very, very much. I hope you like this chapter.**

* * *

Chapter 33: The Last Night

 _"Miss Granger, its time you and I spoke...alone"_

Hermione watched what little colour had been in Draco's cheeks drain and she swallowed the last bite of her food. His worry only added to her own. If he was so blanched at the thought of his mother speaking to her alone, what did that mean for Hermione?

"Okay..." Hermione managed.

"Good," said Narcissa haughtily. "Draco Darling you should rest," she looked at his face. "She'll be back in one piece, stop making that face."

Hermione could see the battle on Draco's face. He smiled at his mother after a moment and said:

"Yes, I think I will lay down," he went over to the bed and if Hermione was not mistaken she saw a slight limp in his movements.

 _He did just almost die, he is allowed to have a slight limp._

Hermione reached down and itched her calf absently

Narcissa rose with all the grace of a queen and walked to the door.

"Well come along," she said to Hermione. Hermione got up and walked hurriedly towards Narcissa sparing a glance back at Draco before the older woman closed the door behind her.

Narcissa led her down a hallway to the west wing of the house and in a large well-appointed study. Once they were inside Narcissa locked the door and cast a spell of silence around the room then she turned to Hermione.

"Alright Miss Granger, I think it's high time that you and I talk."

"Okay," said Hermione, shaking a little. "What would you like to talk about?"

"My Son," said Narcissa and she moved around to the other side of the massive oak desk and folded her hands neatly looking over them at Hermione with sharp eyes.

"I would like to make you a deal."

"What?" Hermione balked.

"Sit," Narcissa gestured to a chair. Hermione was so numb with shock that she obeyed without thinking.

"I love my son," said Narcissa and she paused as if the next words were hard to say. "But what he did to you was wrong, and for my part in having it happen to you, you have my sincerest apology."

Hermione just blinked.

Narcissa Malfoy was...apologizing to her?

"That being said, I will not stand by silently as my son is condemned to Azkaban for his crimes," she leaned forward her voice growing dark. "You and I both know that what has happened here is nothing in comparison to what could have happened if my son had not spoken for you from the first."

Narcissa paused and Hermione felt a chill run down her spine. This woman was committed, convicted and unwavering in her drive to protect her son. Hermione had no doubt in her mind that Nrcissa would do whatever was nessiary to protect Draco.

"I know," Hermione managed. She did know-had thought many times about-what it would have been like for her if Draco hadn't spoken up on her behalf. She would be dead or Greyback's plaything.

"Good, so you are aware," her chin lifted. "They said you were bright," she pursed her lips. "I want to make a deal are you listening?"

"Yes."

"If the Dark Lord wins the first thing that will happen is Lucius will insist on the Bind being removed, which we both know what that means for you."

"I'd need to die."

"Yes, I presume you would prefer to not have that happen."

Hermione nodded.

"My deal is simple. If the Dark Lord wins I will ensure your safe passage, a new life and new face somewhere far from here." Narcissa paused letting her words sink in. "If Mr. Potter and his friends somehow manage to win...you will promise me not to speak of what Draco has done here beyond the undeniable night of that photograph." Narcissa looked at Hermione and waited for her to speak.

"So...if you win I can live, if we win, Draco lives."

"That is all I am asking for, the promise of a life for a life."

"I agree," Hermione answered without hesitation. Narcissa seemed surprised at her agreeing so readily.

"Your word Ms. Granger. I have no one I can trust to perform an unbreakable bond, but I want your word."

"You have my word Mrs. Malfoy," said Hermione. "And I have yours?"

"You have my word," Narcissa nodded and then she took a breath and stood. "There, now that that is settled, I will return you to Draco's room."

* * *

Draco had wanted to go and lay down but as soon as his mother had suggested she and Hermione talk he found himself wide awake and full of adrenaline. What on earth did his mother want to talk to Hermione about? He found himself wanting to say no and had to bite his tongue. He couldn't argue with his mother about anything, let alone make it seem like he was trying to protect a 'Mudblood."

As soon as they left he started pacing.

Pacing hurt his leg so he put a quick stop to that.

 _This is a perfect time to go down to the cellar and make the other half of the door,_ thought Draco. As soon as the thought was there it took hold and he apperated down, not trusting his leg on the stairs.

He went over to the wall and picked a brick with a small chip out of it as the first, the second he picked had black speck in the shape of a hexagon, and the third was equidistant between the two. He taped them and cast the incantation then he stepped back and tapped the three bricks in order, nothing happened. Draco took a deep breath and looked down at the wand.

"Help me do this right," he said and closed his eyes.

This time when he said the words he was careful to enunciate each one perfectly clearly. He moved the wand with flourish and felt like an invisible hand was helping him move it in perfect sync. He felt a glow and when it stopped each of the three bricks were glowing. The light faded from them and Draco stepped back. He tapped on each of the bricks in order and this time the wall re-ordered itself. Bricks shifted in a small space creating a door just big enough to pass through. On the other side of the wall was a door. Draco turned the knob opening the door and revealing the interior of the hut in the oasis.

Draco stepped through and the wall closed behind him.

 _You did it,_ he told himself.

 _She did it_ , he corrected. It was her notes that had helped him succeed.

"Together," he said softly. "We did it together."

A small smile touched his lips. That sentence had a particularly appealing sound to it.

He made his way through the hut and out to the main area of the oasis. He breathed in deep.

 _Its time you show her,_ he said to himself.

 _Its time you let her into this place._

A part of him didn't want to, and sweat slicked his palms. Another part wanted it so badly it almost hurt. When he had seen her standing here in the sun...it had moved him so much. He wanted to see her here again.

 _This isn't about you wanting or not wanting her here, this is about her safety, if anything happens to you she needs a way to escape._

As if sensing his thoughts his leg began to throb. Draco grimaced. The potion he had taken had made it feel better for a little while. He pulled up the pant leg. A trickle of black ooze slipped out from the hole and Draco used his wand to pull out a stream of the black gunk. He incinerated it and the smell was like that of rotting eggs.

"Weasely you fucking ass," Draco swore.

He went back in the hut and applied fresh salve and took another drought of healing potion. He tried to cast a healing spell on his leg, but it stung and seemed to have little effect. With a deep breath Draco calmed himself.

 _You need to tell someone about this..._

 _Who the hell can I tell about this?_ he thought back, his mother would freak out, his father wouldn't be helpful, Hermione would just worry, Fred might know something, but Draco wasn't ready to show that kind of weakness in front of the redhead just yet. Which left only Snape.

 _If things get worse you should talk to him._

Draco nodded to himself. If things for worse he would owl Snape. Hopefully the curse would fade in time. The potions and salves at least seemed to be helping.

"You'll get through this," he told himself. The words sounded hollow.

Draco made his way back to his room just in time to see Hermione come back from her conversation with his mother.

She closed the door softly behind her and turned meeting Draco's anxious gaze.

"Is everything alright?" he asked.

"Yes," said Hermione nodding. She walked forward to the center of the room and stopped so that she was standing just a few feet from Draco.

"What did she want to talk to you about?" he asked wanting to close the distance between them..

"You," said Hermione, which didn't overly surprise Draco. "She just wanted to make sure that if the order wins I don't have you put in Azkaban for life."

"Oh..." Draco swallowed.

 _Because of what your mother thinks you did to Granger that night._

 _And for all the times you tortured her_ , his mind added.

 _You might still end up going to Azkaban when all this is done._

Hermione would vouch for him, he believed in his heart of hearts that she believed he was doing this for her. That didn't mean she would win out over the voices of Ron and Harry who would likely claim he had used Imperius on her.

"I wouldn't," said Hermione taking one step closer. "You know that right?"

Draco nodded.

"Good, as long as you know," she reached out and touched Draco's hand. For once Draco couldn't bring himself to pull back or away from her.

Hermione blinked up at him and Draco looked down at her. Without thinking he leaned forward slightly pausing. Hermione didn't pull away, but she didn't move forward either she just tilted her head to the side looking at him quizzically. Draco pulled back.

"Do I have something on my face?" she asked.

 _Of course she wouldn't realize you were leaning in for a kiss, she has no idea how you feel about her._

 _A part of her has to know,._

 _Don't do that, you've done a damn good job of keeping your feelings away from her. don't scare her away now, its a good thing she didn't realize it would ruin things between you._

 _But she said she does care about you._

 _She didn't mean it._

 _She might have meant it,_ he argued back and forth with himself.

"No, you're fine," he said and changed the subject "Your solution worked."

"Oh wonderful," she squeezed his hand and stepped away. "So, where is it?" her eyes were bright and full of curiosity.

"I'll show you," he said and walked her out in to the main hallway. She followed obediently in tow. No one else was around except for his mother so he didn't need to use any illusions or chains and after all this time even if someone did apperate in he could claim that he had trained her to follow him as he wished.

Draco led her down towards the cellar.

"Where are we going Draco?" she asked and he could hear the wariness in her voice.

"I have to take you back to the cellar, only for a moment I promise."

Hermione stopped walking and Draco turned to face her. The look on her face damn near broke his heart.

"I don't want to go back," she said shaking her head.

"I don't want to take you back."

"Then don't," she said and rushed towards him stopping just inches apart as if realizing at the last second that someone else might see them.

"Please trust me Hermione," he said softly willing her to put a little faith in him with his eyes.

Hermione closed her eyes. She took in a shaky breath and then spoke.

"You don't know what it's like for me down there," Her voice was barely above a whisper. "To know what almost happened…and to remember what did…" When she opened her eyes he could see the moisture there. Her eyes glistened and threatened to well with tears

"You are strong Hermione," said Draco and he reached out to touch her shoulder. Instead of staying there apart from him this time she leaned in. Draco glanced around and was glad to see no one watching. "You are strong enough to face this. I put the door down there so no one can ever trap you there again."

"What?" she pulled back. "You hunted down a volume on doors, struggled figuring it out so that I wouldn't have to be trapped down there..." she blinked and fresh tears filled her eyes.

"Please don't cry, I didn't mean to make you sad," Draco's heart wrenched in his chest. "It was necessary. I don't want you to be in danger of... that ever again."

"I'm not sad Draco," she wiped her eyes before any tears could fall. "I'm grateful."

Draco blinked not understanding for a moment.

She squared her shoulders and he was pleased to see the strength that he so admired about her flare to life full force. She burned brightly before him.

"Show me," she said firmly.

Draco reached out for her hand instinctively drawn to her flame like a moth. She took his hand and Draco led her down the stairs, through the iron barred door and over to the wall where he had put the secret door.

Glancing back Draco cast a quick veil at the bottom of the stairs so that no one would see them even if they were looking.

With trepidation growing every passing second Draco extended his hand and showed her which bricks to tap and told her the words to say.

This is it, he thought, _there is no turning back now._

He had purposefully made the door so that Hermione didn't have to have a wand in order to open the passage just in case she didn't have the one she was using here with her. He had thought of that part and figured out that change to the spell on his own-she had managed to figure out the melding of the two spells together. They made a good team.

 _If only she could see that…_

Draco shook his head.

Don't be stupid.

Hermione looked to Draco for confirmation and he gave a tight nod. She tapped the bricks in quick succession and spoke the words. Suddenly the bricks began to move and Hermione stepped back. Then she peered through the open space and stepped forward and through.

"Its the cottage!" she exclaimed and turned to see the wall close behind Draco.

"Hut actually, but yes," corrected Draco gently.

"Brilliant, so if you are ever away and I get put down there..." Hermione's face suddenly fell. "Why did you feel the need to make this now?" she asked.

"I'll explain later, let me show you how this door works."

"Okay," she answered, though Draco could tell she wasn't happy at his changing the subject.

"This isn't the only way out though," said Draco. "There is another door."

"The dock on the beach the other exit is there isn't it?" Hermione guessed correctly

Draco nodded.

"Can I see it?"

Draco swallowed.

 _You have to show her._

 _You knew this was coming._

Knowing it was coming didn't make it any easier.

Draco couldn't make his mouth work, instead he nodded and walked out the front of the hut. Hermione walked out behind him and Draco turned in time to see Hermione's reaction.

Her eyes widened with wonder as she unknowingly looked at a naked piece of his soul.

* * *

"This is incredible!" Hermione exclaimed. The world they were in was a perfect circle and she could see where the horizon met water. It was absolutely lovely. The breeze was beautiful and soft and played with her hair. She spun around "Is this a pocket dimension?"

Draco nodded.

"Did you inherit it?" she asked climbing onto the big rock by the palm tree and spreading her arms out. "It's perfect," she said before he could answer. She jumped down and toed off her shoes squishing her toes in the sand. "It's so soft," she exclaimed and looked up at Draco.

His expression was unreadable. She felt like there was a huge wall up between them. All the childlike wonder gave way to worry.

"Draco?" she cocked her head to the side and walked towards him. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head and took a step back as if afraid of her, or at least afraid of opening up to her.

"You can tell me," she said and placed a hand on his chest.

"It's...I've..." he looked away from her, "You're the first person...the only... person who's ever been here."

"You mean other than the person who showed you this place and gave it to you. I knew the Malfoy's had a lot of money but I never imagined buying something like this. It must have cost a fortune, all the time and spells that had to have gone into making this place I would have taken months at least..." she trailed off looking around at the oasis.

"Years," said Draco so quietly she almost missed it.

"What?" she turned back to him.

"It took years..." Draco swallowed and pushed a hand back through his hair. "No one else...has been here...ever...well," Draco's face changed and he rolled his eyes slightly. "I did bring Fred here but he was unconscious and I've kept him in the room I made for him."

"The room you made for him?" Hermione suddenly registered everything that he was saying. "Draco did you make this place?" she asked in wonder.

He nodded.

"You did…" she breathed and looked around and found that she was suddenly overwhelmed by the beauty and by the fact that the young man standing opposite her was responsible for something this incredible.

"I had no idea Draco...I mean I knew you were smart but this..." she gestured around. "This is a masterpiece." She looked at him. "This is art."

"You like it?" he asked and she realized just how vulnerable he sounded.

"I love it Draco," she said sincerely.

"Watch this then," he gave his arm a wave and the sun set and the night sky lit up with dozens of stars and oversized planets painted every colour of the rainbow. Jupiter with its bright oranges and reds, others green, and blue and shining purple. Stars glittered like burning fireballs in shades of blue or orange or yellow.

Hermione' s mouth dropped open of its own volition as the bright spheres glittered in the air. She felt like she had when she was eight and her parents had taken her to the planetarium. She remembered looking up at the projections and wishing she could reach out and touch them, here she felt like she really could.

 _This is how magic should be,_ she found herself thinking.

 _Beautiful and artistic and creative and good._

When she looked back to Draco he was standing much closer to her. Still far enough away that she would have to move to touch him, but the distance she had felt before was gone.

She swallowed. How could someone who had been raised in such an austere and strict environment come up with something like this?

 _He did it to cope,_ she blinked knowing it was true.

 _He did it to escape._

 _And he has been using it for ages._ Pieces came together rapid fire in her mind.

 _This is his, it's like a piece of him...that's why it felt different when you were standing with him on the beach before after Fred..._

 _You are standing in something he made that no one else knows, his safe place, his oasis. This place is a part of him and he let you in..._

No wonder he had looked terrified before, the intensity of the moment was not lost on Hermione.

 _He let you in…_

Hermione's heart ached in her chest. She wanted to grab hold of Draco and hold him close and never let him go.

 _You can't think like that._

 _I don't care._

"The other door," she said. "It's in your room isn't it? That's why we always end up right back there when we come back from seeing Fred."

Draco nodded.

"Where is it?"

"It's the wardrobe," answered Draco simply.

"Fantastic. I read about Newt Scamander and his suitcase that he always brought with him."

"That's where I got the idea," admitted Draco "I read about it, but Newton Scamander's was, is, much more intricate and...Involves a lot of magical creatures and...as you know, most of those don't like me."

"Oh..." Hermione's thoughts went to Buckbeak.

He seemed to read her mind, "I'm sorry for what happened third year."

"I'm not the one you need to apologize to about it."

"I very much doubt Hagrid would want to see me again, ever," said Draco.

"You'd be surprised. He's a very kind and good man you know," said Hermione.

"Like you," said Draco.

"Thanks," Hermione rolled her eyes playfully at the potential insult of the comment. She might have bushy hair but she hardly considered herself like Hagrid-though she loved the giant of a man very much.

"I meant the good and kind part," said Draco shoving her shoulder playfully. "You and I both know you aren't a giant man."

The oasis seemed to get warmer all of a sudden and Hermione felt herself flush.

"Shouldn't we get back..." suggested Hermione breaking the moment. "Your mother will expect you for dinner."

"Why don't you stay here," said Draco. "Stay with Fred, enjoy each other's company. This will be his last night here after all."

"What?" Hermione panicked.

"He said he's well," said Draco. "He needs to go, the sooner he goes the sooner you'll get rescued the sooner you're safe."

"But I've only just got him back," protested Hermione. "What if he gets caught!" she was turning hysterical. The idea of loosing Fred all over again…it was too much.

All of a sudden Draco's arms were around her.

"It's okay," he said holding her close. "It's going to be okay."

"How do you know that?" she asked without pulling away.

She needed his arms, she did not want to leave them or have him let her go.

"I just do," said Draco. "I know Fred will pull through."

"I hope you're right," Hermione squeezed him tighter.

 _You need to let go_ , she told herself and pulled back.

"I will stay with him then," said Hermione with a nod. "You'll come by after?"

"If you'd like," said Draco making it sound like he didn't want to intrude as an unwanted guest.

"Of course I would," she said and gave him a smile.

"Okay then," Draco looked at her seeming to try and figure out what to do or say. He clearly gave up and then just turned to walk out.

"Draco," Hermione reached out and grabbed his arm.

"Yes?" he looked back at her and she was caught once again in his eyes. She wanted to pull him back in for another hug, instead she simply said:

"Thank you."

Draco gave a small smile which almost reached his eyes.

"You're welcome."

* * *

Dinner with his parents was blissfully uneventful. It was just the five of them, Draco, his parents, Bellatrix and Voldemort. When the meal was finished both sets of adults went their separate ways leaving Draco alone to his own devices, which he was more than fine with. He had something he had to do.

Draco went down to his potions room and said a small prayer before checking on the Felix Felicis.

He had been working on it for the last six months and if his timing was correct...it would be finished now. It had been close when Hermione had first arrived. He had gone down and checked on it then to distract himself after accidentally hurting her with the silencio, and hadn't touched it since.

The colour was right, this time the potion had leapt merrily as he brewed it.

The smell was right.

Draco took a deep breath and drank a small portion.

He immediately felt better.

Things felt like they were going to work out alright.

He suddenly had a hankering for wine.

He went down to the cellar, grabbed a few bottles of wine and then tapped on the bricks leading to his oasis.

Laughter hit him as soon as he entered the hut. The door to Fred's room was slightly ajar. His heart squeezed at the sound.

 _Oh to be happy._

"Hello all," he said as he entered the room and sat down on the ground between them.

He was taken aback for a moment when he saw Fred's face.

Fred had a patch over his eye which Draco presumed Hermione had created with her wand at Fred's behest. It had a very elegant satin finish to it that leant an air of sophistication at odds with the rest of what Draco had always pictures Fred to be. The redhead had not been wrong, on Fred's face the patch looked...oddly enough somewhat dashing. Draco nodded inwardly, a part of him happy for the older boy's sake that it looked good.

"Do you like it?" Fred asked obviously noticing Draco's look. "I told you I would look dashing did I not?" he wriggled and eyebrow and Hermione stifled a giggle.

"A true pirate, just grow some facial hair and we can call you red beard," said Hermione pushing Fred's shoulder playfully.

"He should stay clean shaven, it suits his face better," the words slipped out of Draco's mouth.

There was a moment of shocked silence from all.

"Well, well, well," said Fred cracking into a smile. "Is it just me or did you actually pay me a compliment?"

"I don't know about that," said Draco looking away, he felt his cheeks heat.

"No," said Fred, "I am pretty sure that counts. If you said something like: 'Yes he should, it would hide his ugly mug'." Fred imitated Draco's cocky snarky tone from school, "Then that would be called an insult. However," Fred leaned back. "You said I look better without it which means that you think my face is handsome just as it is."

"You are incredible," said Draco rolling his eyes and shaking his head.

"Thank you for noticing," said Fred puffing out his chest a little. Hermione Laughed and poked Fred's stomach. Fred let out the air and 'tsked' at Hermione.

Draco down several goblets and poured out wine into them.

"And just what is the occasion?" asked Fred looking back at Draco.

"This is your last night here," said Draco, feeling suddenly self-conscious at the nice gesture he was trying to make for Fred and Hermione.

What if they thought it was ridiculous?

What if Fred genuinely made fun of him for it?

What if they took it the wrong way and thought he was happy to be rid of Fred?

 _Shut up,_ he told himself.

 _Just…fake it till you make it._

But that would be easier. This wasn't faking, this was real and it made Draco feel extremely vulnerable. It was one thing to get turned down being a cocky ass, it was another thing entirely when he was actually trying to be genuine.

"You need a proper send-off." Draco tried to keep his voice calm and confident as he handed the goblet to Fred. His hand was shaking ever so slightly and he prayed neither of them would notice.

Fred took it without saying a word and Draco found himself rambling adding on: "It's dangerous out there for those of you trying to save the world like do-gooders do."

 _Do-gooder's do? You Sound like a friggen pratt Draco,_ he told himself.

He lifted his glass to Fred. Fred hesitated for only a moment, obviously trying to figure out Draco's angle. He seemed to consider. Draco held his breath waiting.

 _Please…_

"Cheers," said Fred lifting the glass.

"Cheers," said Draco, letting go of the breath he had been holding in he took a drink. Over his wine glass Draco could see Fred watching him to make sure Draco drank before taking a sip of his own.

"Blimy this is good," said Fred eyes widening when he finally tasted the wine.

Fred picked up the other goblet and handed it decisively to Hermione.

She took a sip without hesitation.

Her trust warmed Draco's insides more than the wine.

"Mmmm," she smiled at Draco. "What is this?" she asked. "I like it ever so much more than the other one."

"This," said Draco. "Is Amerone Classico, one of my favourite reds for enjoying on its own," he looked at Hermione. "And you like it because you are sweeter than the last wine we had, and this is too," Draco drank his down.

 _Oh Merlins beard why the hell did I say that out loud?_

 _You're going to fuck everything up in one go aren't you._

 _You must have bogged up the potion._

Hermione blushed, but if he wasn't mistaken a small smile appeared to me tugging at the corner of her mouth. Draco blinked.

 _She's not upset?_

Fred rolled his eyes.

"What's with the cards?" he asked changing the subject and taking another swig of wine as he pointed to the deck Draco had brought.

"I need your help so we are all going to play some games now," said Draco.

"Oh are we now?" said Fred teasingly.

"Whatever for?" asked Hermione much more seriously.

"It's okay to have fun sometimes you know," said Fred ruffling her hair. "It doesn't always have to be books, books, books."

Hermione swatted Fred's hand away playfully and then turned back to Draco waiting expectantly for him to answer.

"Because I am testing out a possible solution to something that could prove to be quite an issue," explained Draco. "And playing games will help me know if I am right."

Draco's logic was simple: If he won, repeatedly he could take it as a sign that the potion had worked and then he could give Fred his entire drought of Felix Felicis so that-somehow…hopefully… the redhead would successfully make it out and to safety.

"That makes little to no sense," said Fred. "However," he slapped his knees. "I've been bored out of my gourd for long enough in here." He turned to Hermione. "Excluding, of course, the time spent in your company" he patted her on the shoulder and then stuck his thumb out towards Draco "And the time I have spent teasing Blondie here," he turned to Draco and smiled. "Lets play."

Draco felt like a knife was twisting in his chest. Fred's friendly demeanor felt nice and it also hurt. It threw in stark comparison what the rest of his life and his friends had been like. It hammered home the fact that no one who wasn't his mother had cared about him enough to be nice. No one.

 _Until Her…_

Draco looked at Hermione and swallowed. He caught Fred looking at him and took a large swig of wine, hiding his face. Then Draco dealt the cards with slightly shaking hands.

First they played Go-fish and Draco won by a landslide.

"I'm going to need more wine," said Fred. "If you plan on having that kind of luck all night."

Draco re-filled the redhead's goblet happily, and his own, and Hermione's. After eating so little the wine was going to his head a bit, but it was also completely dampening the pain so he wasn't about to complain.

Then they played War and it was over in three rounds, also in Draco's favor.

"Are you sure you're shuffling the deck?" asked Fred raising an eyebrow and holding out his goblet for another round. Draco poured Fred another and Hermione and topped off his own which was only about a third of the way down.

"You go ahead and deal then," said Draco handing over the cards. "Lets play 21, losers drink"

Hermione giggled.

"Are you drunk 'Mione?" asked Fred.

"Only a little" she slurred her response.

"We don't have to play if you don't want to," offered Draco. He had won enough rounds of the last few games he was fairly certain that the Felix Felicis was good to give to Fred. He could feel the effects wearing off now though. Things didn't seem quite as positive anymore. He had only taken a sip, just enough to last long enough to test the potion.

They played a few round and sure enough Draco won the first three and then he lost the fourth.

"Finally!" exclaimed Fred. "The king has fallen, long live the king," Fred took a drink "or rather queen," he corrected as Hermione was the one who had won.

"Thank you, thank you," said Hermione waving her hand comically.

Draco took a sip smiling into his goblet.

She won the next round and drank anyways.

Hermione scooted closer to Draco and wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

"It's okay," she said and squeezed him. "I'll be a good Queen."

Draco had no doubt in his mind that Hermione would make an excellent queen someday. She was just and kind and powerful.

The next round Fred won and Draco and Hermione clinked glasses before drinking. Hermione giggled.

"Remember that time when Ginny was little and she insisted on that tea party but she did it with those champagne glasses she bought thrifting and when we cheers'ed they broke and she cried but then you fixed them and she looked at you like you were the greatest hero ever."

"How could I forget?" said Fred. "I was on baby-sitting duty that day."

"Oh it wasn't that horrible," said Hermione. "Remember her face. She loved you for it."

"Sure," Said Fred. "But she was eleven, I think that's a little old for a tea party."

"Oh boo on you!" said Hermione sticking her tongue out at Fred. "Childhood innocence should not be rushed to wipe away."

Draco felt his spine stiffen as he thought about his own childhood and how quickly the innocence had been taken from him with his father's belt and cane. Hermione's head turned towards him and her face crumpled.

Draco hated that he had let it show. He hated that he had made that smile falter. He hated that she knew.

Draco shook his head at her begging her with his eyes to not say anything. It was one thing to have her know when literally no one else in the whole world knew-it was a completely different thing to have Fred know. Hermione swallowed and lifted her goblet gulping down the contents.

"Slow down there wild thing," said Fred to Hermione while simultaneously filling his own glass with wine from the third bottle.

"I'm fine," said Hermione and she stood and wobbled then sat back down.

"I'll get you some water," said Draco and he stood and walked over to the bar. When he walked back he noticed that Fred was watching him intently.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," said Fred.

Draco frowned.

"Lets play go fish again," said Hermione and they did for a little while.

Half way through the second game Hermione asked for the third time in a row if Fred had any sixes.

"Hermione, I do not have any sixes because there are only four in the deck and I gave you my last one. There is no way you even have any in your hand right now."

"Oh," Hermione looked at her hand. "Right, sorry," she suddenly burst into giggled and Draco and Fred both watched as she rolled back tittering with laughter until she was sobbing about how her sides hurt. Then she got the hiccups.

"More water I think," said Draco and he went and got her the re-filling glass. She drank readily and smiled up at him with glistening eyes.

"You are drunk," said Fred.

"Yes I am," said Hermione swinging her head over to look at him. "But I feel amazing!" she threw her hands up in the air and smacked Draco across the face with the back of her hand.

"Owww, watch where you are flailing those things," said Draco without any real anger.

"Oh no, I'm sorry!" Hermione threw her arms around Draco's shoulder. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Forgive me."

"Its alright, its alright Granger, I'm not mad."

"Good," she said and sat upright. "Because I want no one fighting tonight."

"Okay," said Draco.

"No one," she turned to Fred.

"Promise," said Fred.

"Good," said Hermione and yawned. Then she turned and rested her head on Draco's shoulder. Draco looked at Fred and Fred seemed to pretend he wasn't seeing his little brother's love interest leaning on Draco Malfoy's shoulder.

A few moments later a soft snoring reached Draco's ear and he looked across at Fred.

"Is she asleep?"

"It would appear so," said Fred.

"I think we should let her sleep."

"Agreed."

Draco shifted.

"I'm awake!" said Hermione sitting up with a start.

"We know you are," said Fred. "But you forgot to tell that to your eyeballs."

"They just have issues with the…" she yawned. "Things…"

"Yeah things like staying open," said Fred taking a swig of wine.

Draco got up again

"Where are you going?" protested Hermione grabbing his pant leg on the good side.

"To get you a pillow so you don't get a crick in your neck."

"Oh," she blinked and he watched his words make it through the haze of alcohol and to her brain. "Okay," she let him go.

He returned from the couch with a cushion and handed it to her. Hermione plopped in on top of Draco's leg and hunkered down.

"You two keep playing," she said waving her hand. "I'm just going to take a nap. Wake me up in fifteen."

"Sure," said Fred shaking his head.

Hermione's soft snore answered him.

"I have no intention of waking her up," said Draco.

"Me neither."

"Okay." An awkward silence filled the room.

"You wanna keep going then?" asked Fred breaking it.

"Sure," said Draco, surprised at the offer.

Draco shuffled the deck splitting it for a game of war, figuring that they had both imbibed enough to warrant changing to a simpler game. Fred won the first round through.

"I'm a little nervous for tomorrow," said Fred breaking the silence as the two shuffled their respective piles. Draco blinked and Fred continued. "I have no idea how I'm going to get out of here alive, what with it being death-eater central and all," he lay down his first card of the round sweeping away the winning match.

"I..." Draco swallowed. "You'll be fine." _I hope_ , he silently added laying down his card.

"Do you have an actual plan then?" asked Fred as Draco swept away the win.

"Somewhat," answered Draco honestly.

"Your overwhelming confidence is sweeping away all my fears," said Fred sarcastically.

"I'm doing the best I can," answered Draco and Hermione shifted. Draco looked down at her.

"Are you?" asked Fred and Draco met the older boy's eyes. He could see that Fred was asking honestly.

"I am," said Draco. Their cards tied and they each lay down three. Fred won the end match and picked up the cards flipping over to reveal that Draco had lost a king a ten and an ace in the match.

"You're luck seems to have left the building," said Fred.

"I still have some left in my potions room," said Draco and Fred narrowed his eyes looking at Draco.

"You were using Felix Felicis."

Draco nodded impressed that the twin had put two and two together.

"That's why you won all the early rounds," Fred nodded appreciatively. "It didn't last very long though."

"That's because I was only testing it. I am saving the rest for you."

Fred looked at Draco expression blank and then he shook his head.

"I'm sorry, can you explain?"

"I have been working on it for the last six months-"

"Wait, you've been working on it?" Fred stopped shuffling his cards.

"Yes," Draco answered.

"That is one of the harder potions to make is it not? And kind of dangerous if you screw it up."

"Yes, and yes which is why I tested it on myself to be safe," answered Draco continuing to shuffle his half of the deck. Fred set his down and looked at Draco.

"Let me get this straight," he said. "You tested something potentially dangerous and volatile on yourself instead of me…in order to help me?"

Draco paused processing what Fred had just said.

Last time he had attempted Felix felicis he had fed it to Crabbe and watched his so called friend suffer the ill effects of Draco's failure...this time he hadn't even thought to risk someone else.

 _That's because it looked right, because you were sure you hadn't messed it up,_ he tried to reason with himself. Deep down Draco knew that wasn't true. He hadn't tried it on Fred because he hadn't wanted to risk Fred getting hurt. Because Fred was Hermione's friend and Fred getting hurt would mean Hermione getting hurt and Draco would always rather be hurt himself then let her get hurt.

Fred broke the silence when Draco didn't answer.

"Are you sure you're Draco Malfoy?" he asked raising a brow. "Seems to me that guy was a selfish asshole, and you're not acting like one."

Draco looked down at Hermione.

 _She's the reason,_ he thought.

"The Draco I knew was also a whining snivelling snitch, who turned others in not protected them," continued Fred.

 _Yes,_ thought Draco. _I was._

 _But then she came along…_

Draco reached down and moved a curl out of Hermione's face.

"So did the fairies swap and replace you with a changeling or..." Fred trailed off.

Draco looked up, unsure why the redhead had stopped talking.

Fred Draco dead in the eye.

"You're in love with her aren't you?"

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. DWere you surprised at Narcissa? Did you like drunk Hermione? What did you think of Fred's reaction to things? Did you like this chapters ending? Let me know. Cheers, and have an awesome day.**


	36. Chapter 34: The Goodbye

**Thanks for the love last chapter- it was the most reviewed chapter yet so thank you to everyone:** Toraach, AnayaR, RotcehM, ChildofBrisingr, Aikello, Starearth, .co, ElizColl, elle311, KayleASS, LillsBills,Ayr, Ambearlamb , mega700201, lady alegria, Aid4, Jen7, Scorpia11, mmiller0000, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Fanficfan826, cbacon1972 , MsBeast, wickedwitch617 **and guests** "Who", "Jess" **And** "D" **You all rock.**

 **This chapter was a giant pain in the butt and it was so hard to have it ready for my weekly posting with everything that has gone on in this last week. I sincerely hope you like it.** **I finished it at 2:30 in the morning** **(my eyeballs are soooo scratchy lol) so I apologize if there are any weird words/typos. Feel free to PM me and let me know if there are and I'll fix them. BUT I wanted to stick to my promise of updating every Sunday/Monday. I appreciate you all and take that commitment seriously.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. It contains, violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 34: The Goodbye

 _"You're in love with her aren't you?"_

Draco's whole body locked. Every muscle froze at Fred's words.

 _He knows..._

Draco felt a cold sweat burst out of his pores.

Fred couldn't know.

Fred was not supposed to know.

 _Well what the hell do you expect? You weren't exactly being subtle,_ Draco yelled at himself mentally.

He hadn't meant to be so obvious. It was partially how tired he was, partially the feeling like he might not make it through this and partially the fact that he had had several glasses of wine on an empty stomach that had led to his walls coming down in front of the redhead.

 _Idiot. You're an idiot Malfoy._

As if on cue Hermione murmured something in her sleep and snuggled in closer to the pillow on Draco's knee.

Draco's heart ratcheted in his chest and he felt light headed. He was acutely aware of the fact that he hadn't said anything back or refuted Fred's comment.

A million comebacks raced through Draco's mind:

 _'No.'_

 _'How could you say that?'_

 _'Like hell I am.'_

 _'What are you mad?'_

 _'She's not my kind.'_

 _'There's nothing between us.'_

All were lies and looking across at Fred Draco knew there was no point in arguing. While Fred had phrased it as a question, it was oblivious that the redhead had already seen the truth and if it hadn't been, the length of time that had passed between the asking of the question and now was evidence in and of itself.

"Yes," Draco answered.

Even he barely heard his own voice so he cleared his throat and looked Fred in the eye. "Yes."

"Hmph," Fred sat back and leaned against the side of the bed -frame "Figures."

"What do you mean figures?" asked Draco. The freezing in his limbs gave way to a rush of blood. His cheeks were flushed red and it had nothing to do with the wine.

 _Why isn't he yelling at me?_

 _Why isn't he attacking me or throwing something at me or calling me a worm?_

 _How the hell is 'Figures' his damn answer?_

Draco looked at the older boy sitting back so nonchalantly.

"She's the best person I know," said Fred as if that explained everything.

"She's the best person I know," parroted Draco. She was the best person he knew. She was the best person he would ever meet. She was so kind and caring and brave and-

"You don't deserve her."

Fred's words hit Draco like a ton of bricks and rang true Draco's ears.

 _I know,_ was all he could think back.

Draco looked away.

 _I know._

"She's good," continued Fred.

"I know," replied Draco out loud this time.

There was a rough edge to Draco's voice that he could not hide.

Somehow hearing Fred say out loud what he already knew in his heart was too much. Draco had been told his whole life that he was better than Hermione and here he was being told that he wasn't good enough for her. One of those phrases rang true in his ears-only one and it had nothing to do with his upbringing.

Draco wanted to run and go crawl into a hole. He didn't want to hear this. Didn't want to sit through this and especially not from Fred...he liked Fred...weird as that was to admit. The redhead's sense of humor and zest for life was...inspiring. Having him say Draco wasn't deserving, somehow hurt more than if he had heard it from someone like say...Ron.

"So it makes sense that some of that good would wear off on someone..." continued Fred. "If they had at least a little good in them in the first place."

Draco's head swung back around to Fred. That didn't sound like a rebuke...it almost sounded like...Fred believed there was good in him...

"You don't deserve her," Fred said again. "but you deserve her more now than you did before."

Draco took a second to hear what Fred was actually saying.

 _I deserve her more now than before?_

The thought had never really crossed Draco's mind in that particular way.

Since she had come here and he had gotten to know her he had always thought of her as better and as someone who he would never be able to come close to deserving. If Fred meant what he was saying it meant that he was...better...than before. iIf he could deserve her now more than before maybe there was a chance that one day he could make up for all the wrong doings and actually be with her...

 _Don't be stupid._

Still a flicker of hope took hold in Draco.

"You're not mad?" Draco almost couldn't believe his own ears. "You're not telling me to stay away from her or you'll kill me."

"Is that what you'd expect?" asked Fred.

"Yes!" said Draco loud enough that Hermione woke slightly.

"Everything alright?" she murmured blinking up at them.

"Everything is fine 'Mione," said Fred. "Just boys talking and playing cards."

"Has it been fifteen?" she yawned closing her eyes again.

"You just go back to sleep," said Draco. "We'll wake you when its time."

"Alright..." she murmured clearly already half asleep.

Draco and Fred played another two rounds in a tense silence until they heard the soft snort signifying Hermione was well and truly asleep.

"It makes sense that you'd think that," said Fred, barely above a whisper. "If I hadn't seen how you are now and the way you are with her I likely would have threatened to kill or maim you for coming anywhere near her."

"What do you mean the way I am with her?" asked Draco.

Fred sighed and crossed his arms over his chest ignoring his cards.

"Instead of feeding the pretty girl more alcohol and taking advantage, you got her water. Instead of letting her get a sore neck you didn't hesitate to get a pillow and instead of letting her friend die you risked your neck."

Draco looked away.

Fred pointing out the good...somehow made him feel even more raw than when he pointed out the bad.

"I don't have to like you, or who you were," said Fred. "But that doesn't change the fact that I owe you my life and Hermione would be dead if it weren't for you so technically she would owe you too-"

"I owe her," said Draco, he looked up at Fred. "I may have saved her life...but it's nothing in comparison to how she has saved me."

"And that right there is what I am talking about. The Draco I knew in school would never say something like that."

"I've changed. She changed me."

"Yeah," Fred nodded. "I believe that," Fred blew out a breath. "I am happy you saved her life-for all of our sake's."

"So am I," admitted Draco. He took a deep breath.

Fred finished off his wine.

"I don't know if it counts for much but I am sorry," said Draco filling the silence.

"I'm not the one you should be apologizing to," said Fred and he nodded towards Hermione's sleeping form.

"I've already told her," said Draco.

"And?"

"And she's too damn compassionate and forgiving for her own good."

"Yeah, and?" said Fred with half a laugh.

"And I don't deserve her," said Draco echoing Fred's earlier sentiment.

His tone seemed to cause Fred to pause and he looked at Draco thinking for a moment.

"But you love her," said Fred finally.

"Yes," answered Draco.

"So deserve her."

"What?" Draco blinked.

"Be a person good enough to deserve her," said Fred with conviction.

"I don't know how," Draco admitted feeling all of a sudden helpless. "I still fuck up so much," he ran a hand through his hair. "I'm not a good person."

"So become one," said Fred tilting the empty wine glass up for the last few drops.

"How?"

"Do what you know is right," said Fred. "Stand up for what you believe in...and if you're having trouble figuring out what that is, think what she would do," Fred pointed to Hermione and let his words sink in, then he stood and stretched. "Now, I'm going to have a glass of water and pour myself into bed. I've got a big day tomorrow what with escaping and sending a rescue party your way," he waved his hand in the air listing things off.

"Okay," Draco looked down at Hermione and then back up at the man opposite him. "Fred?"

"Yeah mate?" said Fred on a stretch.

"Thank you."

Fred relaxed down and looked down at Draco.

"For what?" he asked.

"For not killing me when you found out I love her."

"Yeah, well, I do owe you my life."

"So we're square then?" asked Draco feeling a little hopeful.

"I think the scales are still tipping slightly in your favor," said Fred with a half smile. "But sure, If that's what you want, we're square," he gave a smile. "Now go" Fred waved a hand dramatically. "I need my beauty sleep. One doesn't just stay a sexy pirate without trying."

Draco laughed.

* * *

Hermione work to the sound of Draco's laugh. It made her feel warm and fuzzy inside. She wanted to cuddle up to him and never let go.

 _I think I am drunk,_ she thought to herself noting how sentimental she was getting.

"You awake?" Draco asked looking down at her. She smiled up at him dreamy eyed. He was so handsome after all.

"Yes," she said and blinked away the fuzz of sleep.

Get a handle on yourself, she tried to tell herself and found she didn't care enough. Things were good. She felt good and Draco and Fred were getting along. For a little while everything was feeling right in this world and Hermione wasn't about to question it. She wanted to just turn her brain off and enjoy it. Luckily the alcohol was helping with that.

"Come on then, lets get you to bed," said Draco

"Okay," she said rubbing her eyes. She took Draco's outstretched hand and he helped her to her feet.

Hermione wobbled and Draco's arms shot out to steady her.

"I think I'm drunk," said Hermione and wrapped her arms around Draco's neck.

"I've got you," he said and suddenly she was in his arms. His strong arms. She nestled in to Draco's shoulder.

 _If this is what being drunk gets me I should do it more often_ , she thought inhaling his scent.

 _He smells so good._

 _And he's so strong..._

"Goodnight Hermione," called Fred.

"Night Fred," she waved over her shoulder.

It was nice that Fred was being nice. She liked that everyone was playing nice. It was nice.

Nice, nice, nice.

Like the feel of Draco's chest against her cheek.

That was nice too.

Draco carried her out to the beach and across the sand. She looked up at him. He looked like something out a romance novel.

"Mmmmm," she hummed and nuzzled closer.

Draco shifted and Hermione realized he was struggling carrying her.

 _That's odd,_ she thought to herself. _He usually carries me like I'm nothing._

 _He's still recovering from almost dying,_ she told herself. _You shouldn't be making him carry you._

"I can walk," she said.

"Its alright," Draco answered. "We're almost back."

"I don't want you to hurt yourself," Hermione protested lifting her head.

"I'm fine Hermione," his tone took on its bossy warning that she now knew all too well.

"O-kay," Hermione drew the word out into two long and distinct syllables and closed her eyes letting her head fall back down and giving up on fighting with him.

When she opened them again they were back in the room and Draco was laying her down gently on her pallet.

"No," she mumbled and wrapped her arms tighter around his neck. "I want to sleep with you."

He stiffened in her arms for a moment, took a breath and she felt him shift his body slightly away from her.

"I don't think that's a good idea tonight Hermione," his voice was gentle but firm. "You're drunk and I've had a couple glasses myself."

 _I'm not_ _that_ _drunk_ , she thought to herself.

 _I want him. I am sober enough to know that._

Hermione yanked Draco down.

 _I want you,_ she thought at Draco. _I want you so bad._

 _I'm aching for it._

And she was. Her body was wide awake even if her mind wasn't and it wanted Draco with every cell.

He smelled so good.

She turned her face into his neck and inhaled.

"You smell good," she murmured into his skin, her lips feathering against his neck with each word.

Draco froze and she felt him tremble.

 _Why is he trembling?_

 _Did I do something wrong?_

"What's wrong?" she asked pulling back. When she looked at his face she saw such pain.

She didn't want to see Draco in pain.

She needed to make it better.

Without thinking she grabbed hold of his face and kissed him.

The whole world exploded. A white light went off behind her eyelids and she clung to him like he was some kind of a life line. She felt like lightning was racing through her veins. Without even thinking about it her arms tangled round his head and legs came up and looped around his hips holding him close.

Draco let out a groan and then...he kissed her back.

 _Yes,_ she thought on a moan.

This felt right. Everything about this felt right, from the way that his body felt above her to the silk of his hair in between her fingers, from the softness of his lips to the hardness she felt between her thighs.

This was better than any dream.

His mouth opened and he took over the kiss his hand fisting in her hair he yanked her head back and tasted her lips.

Hermione groaned into his mouth.

And then he was pulling back from her, pushing her limbs away and untangling her legs from around him. She felt the loss like a wrench in her system. Her arms felt empty and ached for him to come back.

"What's wrong?" she asked sitting up and suddenly feeling very cold and kind of shaky.

"You're drunk," Draco snapped.

His tone was like a bucket of ice.

 _What have I done?_

 _What did I just do?_

"I'm sorry..." tears welled in her eyes.

 _That was so stupid of you Hermione, why did you do that?_

 _You promised him you wouldn't kiss him again._

 _But tonight was so perfect._

 _And he called you sweet._

 _He was being nice._

 _And you thought that meant something when you know for a fact he doesn't want you that way._

As if reading her thoughts Draco said:

"I don't want to kiss you like this."

The words were soul crushing. The tears that had welled up spilled over.

"I know," she said and she felt a tear roll down each cheek. She was thankful for the dark, thankful that he didn't seem to see her crying. She knew he would hate to see her cry; it would make him feel worse and she had just wanted to make him feel better and feel good with him.

She felt suddenly so ashamed.

Her stomach turned.

"I think I need to be sick," she said and practically ran past him to the bathroom. She slammed the door shut behind her and bent over the toilet. She coughed but nothing came up. She was drunk but she wasn't actually drunk enough to warrant being sick.

 _Yeah, just drunk enough to be stupid,_ She yelled at herself and a sob escaped her lips. She covered it with a cough knowing Draco was just on the other side of the door.

 _Please don't let him realize I'm crying,_ she silently begged. She couldn't handle that level of mortification.

"Hermione are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she answered. "Don't come in." She couldn't handle if he saw her like this: couldn't handle the embarrassment of him knowing she was crying over him-that she had been so stupid as to forget and get lost in the moment.

She stood and splashed water on her face.

 _You idiot. He told you. He told you he didn't want you like that._

The mirror cracked from her anger and she pulled out her wand quickly repairing that.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine!" she snapped.

There was silence for a moment.

"I'm sorry," said Draco through the door.

"I don't want your damn apology Malfoy," she called back. Her heart hurt.

Silence again.

Her chest ached.

 _Never again,_ she told herself.

She took a moment to regain her composure and wiped her face. She cast a quick glamor to make herself look presentable and then went out to face him. Draco was sitting on the side of his bed waiting for her.

"Hermione-" he started but she held up a hand stopping him from saying whatever he was going to say. If he wanted to apologize she wasn't going to hear it. He had warned her. He had tried to do the right thing and she had steamrolled over him. She hated herself for loosing control like that.

"I'm going to bed. We both had a lot to drink, lets just pretend that didn't happen and focus on the fact that the rest of the night was good."

She chose to blame it on the alcohol.

She chose to let him think that because it was so much better than him thinking she was pathetic.

Draco didn't say anything for a moment and then he nodded.

"Okay."

 _Thank god_ , she thought to herself. At least he wouldn't hold it against her. He had accepted her excuse: He would blame the alcohol. She could not blame the alcohol for herself though. Inside she knew the truth: the alcohol hadn't made her want to kiss him, it had only erased her inhibitions so that she acted on the desire that had been growing with every passing day.

She walked past Draco and went to her pallet and lay down and thanks to the wine, fell directly asleep.

* * *

Draco wandered down the tunnel. There were cobwebs on every wall.

 _This is a spiders hole_ , he found himself thinking.

He shivered. If he was in a spider hole this big that meant he was in the forbidden forest and Draco hated the forbidden forest.

The air had a cool sticky feel to it and Draco's skin crawled with the desire to get the hell out of the tunnel.

There was light near the one end and he moved as quickly as he could towards it.

This light didn't feel warm; it didn't feel like the light he had seen before Hermione had called him back.

Draco accidentally put his hand on one of the walls.

It stuck firmly in place.

"Oh no," he said aloud and he felt a slimy substance run down his back. He writhed trying to pull away and reached for his wand. His hand came up empty.

"Where the hell is my wand?" he muttered. He needed his wand. His wand was special, it was on his side.

A spider crawled up his leg and Draco jumped back. His footing left him and he stumbled back so that his back slammed against the sticky wall.

"Fuck!" he called out.

He wriggled and tried to move to no avail. He watched as the white cobwebs turned black and began to drip with the black ooze he recognized from his leg.

"No," he breathed. His chest seized.

Dozens of slime coated black spiders came from further down the tunnel. His arm with the dark mark ached viciously as the spiders came closer and closer crawling up his legs. Draco writhed.

"Help me!" he screamed. "Somebody help me."

"There is no one to help you now boy," came a dark voice.

The spiders crawled up until they covered every inch of his body.

And then they began to eat.

* * *

Draco woke with a startled gasp. He flung off the covers which had gotten twisted around him during the nightmare. His chest felt tight and his head was pounding. As sat up the feeling only got worse.

For a moment he thought it might be the alcohol, then he swung his legs over the side of the bed and the second he put pressure on his leg he nearly toppled and the pain doubled.

He barely made it to the bathroom in time to empty the complete contents of his stomach into the toilet. Everything that came up was all black.

He flushed and then collapsed beside the toilet and sat shivering.

Fear coated his veins. This was worse, this definitely felt worse.

 _You shouldn't have been drinking wine last night either, that probably didn't help._

He paused and moved the pant leg up for his pajama. The black mark had widened in diameter so that it was covering a good third of his calf. Veins crawled up his leg like the webs from his dream. Draco took off his pants and looked in the mirror.

The black veins were all up the side of his body ending half way up his rib-cage.

They ached and pulsed.

"Fuck me," Draco breathed and he leaned back. The tile behind him felt inordinately cool and suddenly that was worrisome.

 _He's fucking killed me. The damn Weasel has killed me._

 _I didn't know he had it in him..._ thought Draco.

 _How would you be if your brother was dead and you came face to face with the man who was holding the woman you loved?_

 _I would kill me,_ He answered back.

Draco let out a breath he touched the wound and clenched his teeth letting out a strangled sound of pain.

Worse, this was definitely qualified as worse. He redressed hurriedly.

He had to tell Snape.

He grabbed his wand from his bedside table and a several potions he had left out for himself in the morning and went back to the washroom. He didn't need Hermione to see. He didn't need her to worry. Especially after last night.

 _The way she kissed you..._

Merlin he had wanted to kiss her back and he had. For a moment he had lost control and given in to the sweet, sweet taste of her. She was everything he could ever want and need and she had been warm and willing.

And Drunk.

He couldn't bear it if she woke up the next morning feeling like he had taken advantage of her...like he had raped her.

She hadn't been sober enough to consent and Draco...loved her.

He would never fucking risk hurting her like that.

He had promised he would never hurt her like that.

No, he had to be strong for her. He straightened his back. Whatever kind of a curse it was all he had to do was live long enough to have Hermione rescued. After that it didn't matter.

He took a swig of the pain reliever and then took the general healing potion. He used his wand to draw the black ooze from the wound. With shaking hands he applied the salve to the open wound. His eyes watered and he felt like his leg was burning. Eventually the pain eased and he looked down to see the salve had aggravated the wound instead of healing it.

That was new.

That was different in the worst of ways.

"What kind of curse did you hit me with you damn Weasel?" said Draco through gritted teeth. He cast a spell wrapping a white gauze around the wound. It still hurt but he could walk on it without a limp as long as he focused on walking normally.

He went out in to his room and called his owl writing a note to Snape.

 ** _Professor Snape,_**

 ** _Something happened in the battle._**

 ** _Ron Weasely hit me with a curse that isn't healing._**

 ** _I need your help. Its getting worse._**

 ** _-Draco Malfoy_**

He folded up the note keeping it short and sweet and sent off the owl.

He looked to the window seeing the sun was already well up.

He looked to Hermione, sleeping peacefully on her pallet.

 _With any luck she won't remember any of it._

He went downstairs and whipped up 3 breakfasts in record time, keeping it simple this time around. He could already hear people waking up and moving around and he didn't need any questions on the amount of food he was bringing back to his room. He also grabbed several days worth of dried food for Fred to take with him on the journey.

Then he went down to his potions room and took hold of the Felix Feliis.

 _You should take it yourself, it would likely help with the cursed wound,_ said the voice that Draco now recognized as his old self-the selfish self.

 _Fred needs it more_ , he answered back.

 _Are you sure about that?_

Draco wasn't sure. He had never been so scared in his life of what was going to happen to him and at the same time only really cared about living long enough to see Hermione safe and sound. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He would give the potion to Fred, because Fred making it out and sending back help to save Hermione was the most important thing.

* * *

Hermione was awake and waiting for him when he returned to the room.

"Are you alright?" she asked "You look pale."

"I was sick this morning," he answered honestly.

"I don't feel that well either. I feel like I have fuzzy blankets on my teeth from the wine and like...she squinted at him. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"Why are you asking?"

"My chest feels weird," she said rubbing at it.

"Eat something," said Draco. "it will make you feel better. And spend the day with Fred."

"What are you going to do?" she asked taking the two trays from him.

"Go be social so no one suspects anything," said Draco. "I need to get out of my room or people will start to wonder why I am spending all my time with you."

"Right," said Hermione. "That makes sense."

Draco watched as she stepped into his wardrobe.

"Wait," he said.

"What?" Hermione turned back to him.

 _You should ask her what she remembers about last night._

 _No, you definitely should not,_ he countered and opted for talking about something else.

"If you here an alarm go off it means someone other than me is trying to get in to my room. Drop whatever you are doing and come back. We can't have them thinking...we can't have them know about the oasis."

"Right," said Hermione. "Of course."

"Have fun," Draco tried to offer a smile.

"Thanks," said Hermione flatly and then she left.

"You're a right bloody idiot," Draco told himself. "Have fun? Stupid. Its her..." He glanced around worried for a moment that someone might be listening and then continued the thought in his head.

 _Its her last day with her friend_

How the hell could she have 'fun.'?

It was half the curse and half the kiss that had Draco completely on edge. Not knowing what to do about either one was almost the worst part. Almost.

* * *

Draco spent the day being social and waiting for an owl back from Snape.

His leg throbbed.

His head hurt.

"Are you feeling alright darling you look pale?" said Bellatrix. "And have you lost weight?"

"Stress," answered Draco.

"Tsk, tsk" said his aunt. "We musnt let ourselves go," she turned to his mother. "Cissy, have you not been feeding the boy while he's sick?"

"Of course I have," said Narcissa hautily. "What kind of a mother do you think I am?"

"Sorry Cissy," said Bellatrix sounding genuinely contrite. She knew better than to suggest that Narcissa was anything less than a dedicated mother. Everyone who was close enough to know Narcissa as a person knew that Draco was her priotity.

 _And what will she do if you die?_ Draco found himself thinking.

 _How do you think she will feel finding out that you hid this cursed wound from her for days? Hmmm? Do you think she will ever forgive herself for not knowing? You're a selfish prick._

 _I owled Snape, he'll know what to do._

Suddenly that wasn't enough. Draco went over to the bookcase containing dark curses and pulled out a volume.

"Ooo, that's a good one," said Bellatrix. "Lots of nastiness inside that one," she smiled wickedly.

Draco caught his mothers disproving look and couldn't bare to hold her gaze.

 _She thinks so little of you now..._

 _If you die you'll never be able to prove to her that you became better..._

Draco shook away the thoughts and immersed himself in the book.

Hours later he had nothing new to go on and his headache had gotten worse.

He barely made it through dinner with his family.

Narcissa handed him a plate in the kitchen.

"What's this for?" he asked.

"For Her," said Narcissa as if stating the obvious.

Draco didn't bother to look a gift horse in the mouth, he simply said thank you and brought the meal up to Hermione.

She was sitting with Fred laughing. When she saw him her laughter died and a piece of Draco died along with it.

 _She obviously remembers last night, and hates you for it._

 _I can't win for fucking loosing,_ he thought.

"I brought you dinner," he said and held it out to her.

"I'm not hungry," said Hermione.

"You should eat 'Mione," said Fred.

"I'm fine," she shot back and then she softened. "Sorry Fred. I'm not mad at you. I'm just worried about the trip is all."

Draco pulled out the bag of suplied and handed them over to Fred.

"There's three days food there," said Draco. "It shouldn't take you that long anyways."

"Thanks," said Fred taking the food.

"And...here," Draco handed over the vial. "Should be twenty four hours worth there, enough to get you safely out of here. My reccomendation is that you walk towards the woods and go out there. There is a barrior all around my families estate but if you don't have a wand with you they will think its just a muggle passing through. It happens often enough. That's my hope anyways. Once you get past the woods you'll see a cliff. Walk down on the east side of it and then make your way south. Its a days walk from there to the nearest town, but from there you should be able to get help and get back to the order."

"Sound like a plan," said Fred and he clapped his hands together. "So when do I start looking death in the eye. Singular."

"In about twenty minutes guards change."

"Right," Fred nodded.

"Once you get to the order tell them to come Friday. That's four days from now. Gives you an extra two to get to them in case anything happens to delay you. Tell them to come at eight-its when the guards change. I'll be sure to be here in this room. I'll leave the window open. Be sure and tell them that they NEED to take me too. I won't fight unless someone else is watching and I promise I'll keep to deffensive or light attacks."

"Right-o. The willing captive will not be forgotten. Do I get to boss you around when you're our prisoner?"

Draco almost managed a smile.

"All I ask is that you personally treat me as well as I treated you. I know you can't control what the others do to me."

Fred's tone grew serious.

"I'm not going to let them beat the shit out of you while I'm around," said Fred. "You might deserve it for the crap you've pulled in the past, but I am not going to let it happen on my watch understand?"

Draco felt a stinging behind his eyes. Fred's words, the support, meant a lot.

"Thanks for that," he managed and cleared his throat. "We should get going."

Hermione threw her arms around Fred's neck.

"Please don't die."

"I don't plan on it," said Fred and he squeezed her back.

Draco led them both back out and through to his room. Fred was nice enough to close his eye without complaint and Draco was pleased to see that he didn't even try to peak.

Standing by the window to Draco's room Hermione and Fred said goodbye.

Then Fred turned to Draco and stuck out his hand.

Draco took it squeezing lightly.

"I'll see you on the other side mate," said Fred with a wink.

"Don't die," said Draco.

"Not you too," Fred rolled his eye good naturedly and then picked up the vial of Felix Felicis. He took a breath.

"Here goes nothing," said Fred. "Bottoms up." He swigged the whole thing and then he blinked. "Wow, well that certainly tastes better than your healing droughts," Fred handed Draco back the vial. Then Fred smiled. "Love you Mione."

And then Fred Weasely jumped straight out of the window.

* * *

 **THE ANGST. You know how some of you have been waiting for a profession of love or a confession? Well...stay tuned this angst build up wasn't for nothing. Did you like Draco and Fred's conversation? It was my favourite part to write for this one. And what about the nightmare? Was it creepy enough that you felt a chill?**

 **I hope you liked this chapter, let me know what you thought in a review if you have the time. Thanks again for reading. Have an awesome day.**


	37. Chapter 35: The Curse

**Shout out to: tomfeltonswifey,** alluringmango, LovEToReadit,KayleASS, TripleLLL, mega700201, lady alegria, .babe, .co, Horses8, Aikello, mollsballs, Iminesia, mmiller0000, AnayaR, wickedwitch617 , Kotodashi Kyoshi, defe, Ayr, Ambearlamb, RotcehM **and guests** "Who" Powerpuff" **and** "D" **For taking the time to review.**

 **Authors note: This chapter is not lighthearted. If you are having a bad day...maybe pick a different day to read the update.**

 **Also don't hate me.**

 ***TRIGGER WARNING: This story is rated M for a reason. It contains, violence, abuse, sex, violence around sex, sexual abuse, molestation etc. I don't want my story to hurt anyone so please do not read if you are not okay with reading about those things. You are warned.**

* * *

Chapter 35: The Curse

Hermione stood solomly at the window looking out at the place where Fred had run into the woods long after he disappeared from view. She couldn't bring herself to look away, as if somehow looking out after him would keep him safe.

 _Please let him be okay,_ she silently prayed.

Finally she forced herself away and turned to see Draco standing just a few feet away, staring at her.

"What?" she demanded a little more harshly than intended.

The fact was that she was scared; scared for Fred and if he would be okay; scared for how things were going to change when they came to rescue her in a few days, and scared of her own emotions how much thinking about Draco's rejection last night hurt.

"Nothing," Draco said. "Sorry, I didn't mean to stare."

His answer frustrated her.

 _You shouldn't be looking at me like that_ , she thought angrily, _not if you don't want me._

"I don't understand you Draco," Hermione shook her head.

 _Why are you provoking him?_ She didn't know why she was talking, why she didn't just close her mouth. She knew she was picking a fight with him. She knew she was pushing him and yet she felt like she was sitting in the back seat with someone else driving. She could not help her own actions and that scared her too because Hermione had always liked control. Right now she felt utterly out of control.

"That makes two of us," he muttered in response.

"What?" Hermione asked grumpily. She was pretty sure she had heard him right, but it was one hell of a cop out of an answer and Hermione wasn't in the mood for games. She was pissed and tired and scared and just wanted to go home.

Seeing Fred just jump out the window had made her want to do the same. It had made her question herself as to why she hadn't done it herself before things got complicated and...emotional with Draco. She knew why she wasn't jumping now...but why hadn't she tried harder before. A small piece of her hated herself for not trying harder.

"I said that makes two of us," Draco dragged his hand through his hair. "I barely recognize myself anymore when I look in the mirror and it's not just because of the scar."

"That scar is nothing," said Hermione dismissively.

 _Why the hell is he so concerned over that little thing? There are so many more important things going on and the scar he has is nothing. It almost makes him more rugged...more handsome..._

She pushed away the thoughts. She did not want to think of him like that. Not now.

"It's something to me Hermione," said Draco and she could hear the pain in his voice. "I've never been ugly on the outside, only within."

"The scar doesn't make you ugly on the outside," _I wish it did, maybe it would make it easier to kill the desire to kiss you,_ she thought.

 _That's shallow,_ she thought back at herself.

"So just get over it already," she added angrily. "Fred lost a damn eye, Bill has real scars all down the side of his face, you've got one stupid 'Pretty' scar over your eyebrow and you're whining about it. Well. Boo-Freeking who."

Hermione saw the pain behind his eyes before he slipped a cool mask into place.

 _Why are you being so mean to him?_

"You're right, I'm selfish and self centered and conceited and no matter what I look like on the outside I'll still be ugly on the inside," said Draco. "So maybe it's better if I'm ugly outside. At least then people will know what to expect."

There was a cool distance in his words and they sounded wrong. His whole voice sounded wrong.

Hermione had gotten so used to his gentle tones and his kindness that she had almost forgotten what it was like to have him be cool and distant. Even when he was playing the part in front of others she could still see the struggle in him, how it hurt him to cause her pain. And now here she was lashing out at him and causing him pain on purpose just because she was upset.

 _This isn't like you, this isn't who you are._

 _Look at everything he has done for you, its not his fault he doesn't want you back._

Hermione froze.

That's what this was all about. She wanted him, she liked him and he didn't feel the same so she was mad at him for it and taking it out on him.

 _Well how stupid of you Hermione_ , she told herself, _going and falling for someone who will never feel the same way._

 _Tears pricked the back of her eyes._

 _Is this how you treat someone you like?_ A quiet voice spoke in her ear as she watched Draco turn away from her.

 _After everything he's done...you're hurting him. It's not fair and its not his fault if he doesn't feel the same so stop blaming him for something he can't help,_ she ordered herself and then looked to the stiff posture of the young man who was walking away from her.

"Draco wait," she said and reached out for him. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" he asked without turning back to her. His voice was still frighteningly flat.

"You're not ugly."

"Yes I am."

"No you're not," she said again. _If you were truly ugly I wouldn't care about you the way I do,_ she added silently. She tried to get him to turn towards her, tugging on his arm. He refused to budge or give her and inch and so Hermione moved for him. She walked around to face him. His skin was pale and drawn and he looked so tired, and yet...he was still handsome to her.

 _It's because you like him for more than his looks._

Fred had asked her only a day ago if she had feelings for Draco, but up until this moment she hadn't realized just how deeply they ran. Looking at his face, even with the impassive mask, she knew a part of her would care for this beautiful, damaged, brave man for the rest of her life.

She needed to undo the damage her anger had wrought. She needed him to see that he wasn't bad. She had said it before and yet he still kept coming back to it again and again. His self loathing ran deep.

 _It's because of how he was raised and everything that he has been though,_ she thought, _people don't just get over damage like that all at once. It takes time to heal wounds that deep._

 _Well I want to at least start the healing..._

"Draco listen to me please," she said reaching up to touch his face. Even if he may never return her feelings that didn't mean that she couldn't show him he deserved to have someone care for him for real, not just for his money or his face but for the soul that hid behind all that.

"I don't know if you have ever been really bad or if it was just that you were a product of circumstance, but you are not ugly."

"My decisions were my own. I'm not going to cop out and blame it all on my parents," he sneered at the suggestion and turned away from her.

"It isn't a cop out when your parents beat and brainwash you!" She grabbed hold of him again he tried to pull away. This time she held fast. "Don't you see?" she put one hand on the side of his face and made him look at her. "You turned into my hero despite all that," she looked into his eyes. "You Draco. You are so much more incredible than someone who was raised to be good. You chose to do good even though you were never taught to, even though it put you in danger."

"I'm not a Hero!" Draco shouted back, his mask finally breaking. "I'm not good."

"Yes you are," Hermione grabbed his face with both hands. "Can't you see?" she held his face and made him look at her. "You saved me. You saved Fred. That's the act of a hero."

"I tortured you, that's the act of a villain."

"To save me," she countered. "You are my Hero."

"Stop saying that," Draco demanded.

"Why? It's true and I want you to get it through your thick blond scull that you are good."

"I am not," he sounded so sure it ripped Hermione's heart in two. How could she reach him? How could she make him see the truth?

"How can you say that?" she managed.

"Because if I were good I wouldn't be so selfish."

Selfish? Hermione balked. There were a lot of words that she could use to describe how Draco had been towards her since her capture. He had been hard sometimes, pig-headed on occasion, mean a few times but not selfish...

"How have you been selfish?" she asked, trying to understand what was blinding him to the truth. "You put yourself out there for me. That's not selfish."

"I should have let you go, I should have just let Voldemort try and make me find you and never told him."

"Oh don't be stupid," she counted. They both knew it wouldn't have worked.

"I..." Draco stammered. "I

"See," said Hermione pointedly. "You haven't been,"

"I WANT To be," said Draco

"In what way? I don't blame you for wanting to protect your mother. That's not selfish-it's the exact opposite of selfish" What was he talking about? What could he want that made him selfish. He wanted out of this, sure, so did she that wasn't selfish it was fucking obvious. No one in their right mind would want to be caught up in this whole situation.

"That's not what I mean," said Draco.

"Then what?" demanded Hermione. "What do you want that could possible make you selfish?"

"You!" Draco blurted out.

Hermione stood shell shocked.

She couldn't form words.

She couldn't say anything.

 _Me?_

 _That's impossible though..._

Her mind reeled.

"See," said Draco and Hermione realized he had taken her silence as rejection instead of shock. "I'm not the Hero."

Before Hermione could tell him he was wrong he vanished in a swirl of black.

* * *

Draco hadn't been thinking of where he wanted to go, he had merely gone. The first thing that came to his mind was water and he found himself standing by the fountain in the middle of his parent's perfectly landscaped back yard. He kicked at the stone of the fountain.

 _You idiot,_ he told himself and he wasn't referring to the fact that he could have ended up in the middle of the ocean, or splinched, for being so careless while apperating.

 _How could you say that to her?_

 _Did you see how she looked at you? Things will never be the same between you again and it's all your fault._

He hated that he had ruined things by telling her that he wanted her.

He wanted to go back upstairs and just obliviate the last ten minutes from her mind so they could go back to being in a place where they could stay in each others lives.

Now, she wouldn't want anything to do with him as soon as this was over.

 _She probably doesn't want to have anything to do with you now,_ his head was pounding and he clutched it sitting down.

 _She never wanted to have anything to do with you. It's only circumstance that has her here, just like its only circumstance that has her telling you that you're her hero._

Draco squeezed his eyes shut as a wave of pain rocked through his body. He leaned forward as a bout of nausea hit.

 _Why did she have to torture him by saying things like that? How could she call him a hero?_

 _Why did she have to push him so hard?_

He clutched his stomach as it cramped.

"Fuck," he murmured. His leg started throbbing and he felt the pulse through every black veins all up the side of his chest. A sweat broke out over his skin. He tried to ignore it, pushing it aside in his mind.

 _You can just avoid her for the next few days, pretend like it didn't happen until she gets saved._

 _Yeah, because that worked so well last time,_ he thought back.

 _She'll probably-_

Pain exploded through his nerve endings and overrode all thought.

Draco fell off the bench he was sitting on, onto his hands and knees and puked out a mass of black. He watched as the oooze seemed to writhe on the ground and shuddered in disgust. He coughed barely able to catch his breath before he was vomiting again.

Being worried about Hermione being mad at him became secondary to worrying about dying before she could be rescued.

Draco's limbs gave out putting him flat on his stomach on the cool stonework by the fountain. He wanted to just close his eyes and give up.

"No," he protested.

 _I can't give in, I just have to hold on a little longer. Four days...that's all..._

He felt so tired though, despite the pain he just wanted to close his eyes and sleep.

 _If I die they'll kill her,_ the thought blasted energy into his system.

Draco pushed himself up with his arms.

Where was Snape? He had owled him so where was he...Draco needed his mentor now. Snape would know what to do.

Draco tried to get back up to his knees and wave of pain slammed into him. His vision blurred, eyes watering from the pain. He felt like every inch of him was boiling. He remembered the nightmare from weeks ago when Hermione had turned into his aunt cutting him open. When his blood had turned black and boiled.

That was what it felt like now. He felt like his blood was boiling.

He rolled to his back coughing.

A moment of calm had him thinking about what had happened when he had woken from the nightmare…when Hermione had woken and comforted him. His eyelids fluttered closed and he felt a brief reprieve of pain and a moment of peace.

And then his stomach was cramping again and his blood boiled afresh in pain.

Draco called out for help, called out for anyone to save him.

Bellatrix was suddenly standing above him

"NARCISSA!" she screeched her sisters name and grabbed hold of Draco. Her hands felt like claws on his skin and Draco cried out, it was like his dream come to life.

"CISSY!" Bellatrix screamed again only her voice grew more and more distant as she called out repeatedly. He began to vomit again and Bellatrix turned him over onto his side and Draco let out a cry from the pain and then all sound ceased and the world faded away.

* * *

Hermione paced the room and waited.

Where had he gone?

Why hadn't he come back?

How could he leave after saying something like that?

Hermione rubbed her eyes in frustration, her head hurt something fierce.

Draco wanted her.

 _No he doesn't._

 _But he said he does._

 _He couldn't mean it_ , she reasoned. She was a 'Mudblood' to him, he hated her kind.

 _But he can't lie to you._

So what did that mean?

A little piece of her mind decided to play with the puzzle of contradicting events and words and it wandered back to what he had actually said to her last time the subject of blood had been brought up.

She remembered standing across from him when his eyes had lingered on her chest and how she had challenged him:

"You know for someone who says they don't want me you certainly know how to make me feel like you do."

"I do have a way of making women feel wanted," Draco had said, his voice going smooth as velvet. "I am a guy Granger," he had added "You're a beautiful woman. Just because I-"

And then Hermione remembered how he had paused.

"Just because you what?" she remembered feeling puzzled at his response and how he had stopped talking…She had already made him swear honesty at that point.

 _What had he meant to say?_ She found herself thinking now.

"You are a beautiful woman, but physical beauty isn't everything. Some people care more about other things."

She remembered her mind jumping straight to conclusions:

"Like blood…people like you care about breeding" she had been mad, snapping at him saying: "Right...I almost forgot my 'dirty blood' what with you trying to save my life and all. I thought you had...never mind. It was stupid of me to think that you could look past that."

 _He never actually said that he didn't want to sleep with you._

Hermione's eyes widened as she looked back on the memory.

He hadn't said he didn't want to sleep with her. He had avoided saying anything of the kind.

 _Because he couldn't,_ a part of her challenged. _He couldn't lie...he does want you._

 _But what about after the kiss?_ The most recent and painfully fresh rejection after the perfect night with him and Fred.

She thought back. The words had been soul crushing… She remembered them clearly:

"I don't want to kiss you like this."

' _Like this'_

 _He didn't say that he didn't want to kiss you... only that he didn't want to kiss you 'like this'_

Heat flooded Hermione's cheeks. She had been drunk…was there a chance that Draco was just being...good?

 _If he had kissed you and more..._

She found herself trying to imagine what would have happened. Would she have been okay with it? A part of her answered yes and the other part knew she wouldn't have wanted to have her first time with him be because of alcohol. Maybe, just maybe he had stopped her because he wanted to be with her for real-not just for a drunken night.

Was it possible that he wanted her for real?

 _He can't lie to you,_ she reminded herself, _and he said he wanted you._

 _And he kissed you back..._

Boy had he ever. She remembered the spark, the passion of that kiss. How good it was had made it even harder to have him reject her.

But what if it wasn't a rejection?

How much did he want her, and in what way?

Hermione paced the room and then sat on the edge of Draco's bed.

If he only wanted sex he could have had that while she was drunk. It would have been wrong, but he had been drinking too. If it was just lust he could have had her...Did he want more from her than just her body. She remembered his words. He had called her talented, he had called her brilliant...

Suddenly pain gripped Hermione's chest.

It was a pain she recognized and it sent fear ricocheting through her entire system.

Draco was in danger.

"Draco!" she called out.

Panic welled in Hermione's chest. Where was he? What if something really bad happened? He would never know she cared. Why hadn't she told him the last time that something like this had happened.

 _You did tell him, he didn't hear you._

 _You told him you cared, but he didn't believe you, not really._

Another wave of pain hit her.

"Help!" she called out. "Someone please help." She crouched over. "Draco!" Suddenly she heard a voice screaming from the window and she looked out to see Bellatrix holding Draco in her arms and screaming for Narcissa.

"No, no, no," Hermione shook her head and backed away from the window still watching them.

Pain lanced through her and Hermione doubled over.

Narcissa appeared beside Bellatrix and started yelling herself. She grabbed hold of Draco and apperated with them both straight into Draco's room. Hermione turned to face them.

"Draco!" she called out and moved towards him wanting to hold him, fix whatever was wrong.

Bellatrix apperated into the room coming between her and Draco. Her face was contorted with rage.

"You!" she screamed at Hermione. "What have you done to my beautiful nephew!?" she lashed out and Hermione screamed in pain as the curse hit her.

"Draco!" She heard Narcissa trying to wake him.

Why wasn't he waking up?

What had happened.

"You filthy little Mudblood!" Bellatrix screamed. "What did you do?"

"Nothing," Hermione screamed in agony.

She wouldn't do anything to Draco. Not like this.

"Crutio!"

Hermione screamed. When the curse finished her world went black.

* * *

Snape apperated to the front gates of the Malfoy manner and half ran into the estate. One of the deatheaters had come to him directly saying Draco was in danger. Snape had gone to his study to get supplies and that was when he had found the owl from young Mr. Malfoy.

"Where have you been?" demanded Lucius. "Where is the Dark Lord?"

"Pre-occupied," answered Snape and strode past the blond. Draco he cared about, Narcissa he respected, Lucius he despised. "Where is he?"

"Upstairs in his room with my wife," answer Lucius falling in step behind Snape.

"Where is the girl?"

"In the cellar, with Bellatrix."

As if on cue Snape heard a scream coming from downstairs. Snape had no desire to hear ms. Granger scream. He was in no position to stop it and still he found himself saying:

"It's not the girls fault."

"And how do you know that?" demanded Lucius.

"Because Draco owled me earlier today about the curse and I very much doubt he would be keeping her close if she was responsible." said Snape. He caught Lucius look of horror out of the corner of his eye "I didn't get it or I would have come sooner," he defended himself.

"What did he say?" Lucius tone trembled.

"The weasely boy cursed him."

"So that Granger creature….?"

"Likely innocent bi-stander," said Snape and another scream echoed through the halls. Snape felt a chill run down his spine. "I'll leave it to you to decide it its worth it to inform Bellatrix or if you wish to just let her have her fun."

Snape took the stairs two at a time and found Narcissa bent over Draco's still form. The boys skin was abnormally pale. How had no one else noticed?

"Severus," she looked up him and Snape saw that she was holding Draco's hand in her own, gripping him as if holding his hand would keep him with her.

Her eyes were bloodshot from crying.

Snape swallowed and he moved swiftly over to Draco's legs he moved one pant leg up and saw nothing then he went to the second and saw the black.

With a waved of his hand Snape had Draco down to his boxers. Narcissa let out a small cry and covered her mouth.

Both she and Snape recognized the wound. They both remembered it from the first war...

"No…." she moaned. "Tell me its not…No one is supposed to know that curse," she protested. "We killed everyone who knew, wiped the rest..." She shook her head. "Tell me it isn't Severus please!" She grabbed his arm and looked up into Snape's eyes.

Snape knew his eyes betrayed the truth. It was what she thought it was.

Narcissa let out a scream of pure agony that echoed through every room in the manor.

* * *

Bellatrix stopped as a scream from upstairs cut through the air. Hermione had never heard a scream like that before. It sent chills down her spine. She felt it in her bones.

 _Draco..._

"Don't even think about moving," ordered Bellatrix. "I'm not finished with you," she said and Disaperated.

Hermione lay there on the ground shivering in the aftershocks of pain. Her blood was pooled around her on the floor and still all she could think about was Draco and how pale he had looked when they lay him down on the bed.

Who had attacked him? Where had he gone that someone was waiting to attack?

She lay on the floor motionless looking at the ceiling.

 _If you hadn't said the things you said he wouldn't have left and he wouldn't have gotten hurt..._

A second scream filled the air, this one half rage half pain. Hermione recognized the mad sound as Bellatrix.

Hermione shivered.

 _Please don't be dead Draco_ , she begged.

 _Please don't die I need you._

A tear slipped down her cheek and she lay there on the floor.

She could still feel him through the Bind and she clung to the fact that he was there with her in some small way.

An hour passed and she slowly pulled herself up off the ground. Her hair was caked in blood and she felt sticky and disgusting. A sound from the stairs caught her attention and Hermione looked over to see Snape coming into the room. He knelt and gave her a small vial. She recognized it as the same potion she had taken the night she had been tortured for the photograph.

She took the vial from him gratefully.

"Is he okay?" she asked not daring to drink until she could ask.

"Drink," ordered Snape.

"I need to know," Hermione insisted.

Snape sighed.

"When Draco went out on his mission for the Dark Lord he was attacked."

"I know…" she managed to breath, feeling everything get quiet.

"Mr. Weasely cursed him."

Hermione felt all the blood drain from her face.

"N-no…" her voice was barely a whisper.

"It's a dark curse, one that was supposed to have been to destroyed and everyone who knew it killed. It seems someone remembered it from the first war. It is a curse specifically designed to kill death eaters," explained Snape.

Hermione felt cold.

"It hurts anyone it hits," continued Snape. "But it only holds onto those with the Dark Mark," he looked Hermione in the eye and she was thankful he saw her need to know more. "It feeds off the Dark and the power of the mark and grows with each passing moment."

"What are you saying professor?" Hermione felt her bottom lip tremble.

"There is not cure for it, not for someone who has the mark."

"No," Hermione shook her head. "No. No, it can't be Ron wouldn't do something like that."

"It seems he did," said Snape. "Usually it takes the persons life within a few days."

"No," Hermione protested. "No, tell me it can be reversed. Let me go, I'll get Ron, convince him to take it back. I'll make him. We can save Draco," she insisted. "We have to."

"I'm sorry Ms. Granger. There is no way to reverse the curse once cast."

"There has to be a way. There is always a way."

"Not this time. No matter what happens now, not matter what we do, it is only a matter of time, hours likely..."

"Before what?" Hermione demanded her voice screeching. She didn't want him to say it. There was no way that this was happening. This wasn't the way that things were supposed to work out. Draco had a plan. Fred was going to get the order, they were going to be saved. "Before what?" she asked again.

Snape looked at her and she felt the tears begin to fall before he answered.

"Before Draco dies."

* * *

 **I warned you, and please don't hate me.  
Trust me please, stick around.**


	38. Chapter 36: The Statue

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed:**. .Me, MoonlitRose731, Aid4, Vannah6642, Karhomarie, Jedi SteelWolf **,** Fanficfan826, Bloodred 321, LovEToReadit, Aikello, Jen7, alluringmango, defe, KayleASS, ChildofBrisingr, .co, mmiller0000 , Horses8, lady alegria, AnayaR, Iminesia, mega700201,Kotodashi Kyoshi, frizzy-wizzy-oringina, Ayr, SectumSemprae, Starearth, Ambearlamb, LillsBills, Thaxiuh RotcehM **and guests** "Who" **And** "D"

 **AUTHORS NOTE: Remember ten chapters ago when I said you should read the short children's story "The Happy Prince" by Oscar Wilde? Well you don't have to read it in order to understand this chapter at all…..But you might get more out of this chapter emotionally if you have read it. Just thought I'd give you a heads up.**

* * *

Chapter 36: The Statue

Narcissa had been casting healing spells for hours and nothing seemed to be working.

Then, a thought came to her through the muddled emotional haze that was clouding her mind.

The curse drew its power from the dark mark.

So if the dark mark wasn't there...

Narcissa swallowed. The idea of tampering with the dark mark made Narcissa feel sick to the stomach.

 _If you do this there is no going back,_ she thought.

 _I don't care,_ she answered. _There is nothing I wouldn't do for my son, nothing I wouldn't risk._

Narcissa took a deep breath and turned her wand towards Draco's arm. Her hand trembled.

"Deletrius," she cast at the Mark.

A black blast threw Narcissa backward and a ghastly black smoke like snake rose up and hissed at Narcissa.

"Narcissssisssa..." The Dark Lord's voice echoed in Narcissa's mind. "What do you think you are doing?"

"I am trying to save my son," she answered back.

"Sssssooooo, you thought that removing my mark would help?"

Pain lanced through Narcissa's head and she let out a cry of pain.

"Yes," she cried.

"I will come to you ssssoooon, until then do not try that again..." his voice was dark. "Or you will regret it."

"But my lord he doesn't have much time..."

A great wind blew through the room leaving Narcissa laying on the floor.

* * *

Hermione cried for an hour before she took the potion Snape had given her. Her eyes hurt from the tears, throbbing inside their sockets. The same pulse and pain echoed at her temples. Her chest hurt, partially from thinking of Draco and partially from everything she had been through with Bellatrix.

When the effects of Snape's potion started kicking in she let herself be taken into the blissful oblivion of sleep.

When she woke hours later the effects had worn off and she felt stiff and sore.

 _Please tell me it was all a dream_ , she silently begged even though she knew that wasn't the case. She had been holding on to Draco as her hope for so many days now that the idea of loosing him was not only gut wrenching for the loss of a person she cared for but also for the loss of all her hope.

She thought back to a time when his death would have just meant she would escape. She remembered the fleeting thought that his death would mean she would have nothing to hold her back from running away and escaping. Memoriy of that thought made her feel a deep rooted guilt.

 _How could you have thought something like that,_ she asked herself.

 _It was because I didn't know him,_ she answered back, _not like I know him now._

Now Draco was so much more than her captor.

He was more than her protector now too.

He was...a part of her.

Everything that they had been through together and for each other had made it so that they were connected more than just through the bind. A piece of Hermione's heart belonged to Draco even if she wasn't willing to admit it to herself.

Hermione sat up groaning as her back cracked like popcorn.

 _You need to go to him...maybe there is something you can do_...

Hermione went to the stairs and made sure no one was watching and then she healed her own wounds with the wand she had tucked under her clothes.

She listened carefully unable to hear a single sound in the house.

 _It must be the middle of the night,_ she thought.

 _That's good, it means no one will see if you go to him._

Taking a breath and mustering her confidence she went over to the wall and gently tapped om the three bricks as Draco had shown her uttering the incantation. One by one the bricks shifted away revealing the hut in the middle of Draco's wardrobe oasis. She stepped inside and walked over to the bar as she had seen Draco do before. She tapped on the top and a little piece of the bar came up.

None of his potions were labeled.

 _How the hell am I supposed to know which one to take?_

 _Use your brain Hermione,_ she told herself. She uncorked on and took a sniff. She didn't recognize the smell and so she recorked it and put it back. The second one she uncorked smelled like the salve he had given her to put on her wounds. She set that one aside. The next smelled familiar and she put a dab on her tongue. It was definitely the healing potion he had given her most often. She took it down and then began to rub the salve on the cuts Bellatrix had made.

She saw a tear drop onto her dirty arm and whipped her face.

Draco couldn't die. There had to be some way. She looked over at Draco's books and began to pull them off the shelf. She spent several hours searching and could not find even one mention of the curse Snape was talking about.

 _Maybe Snape lied to you._

 _Why would he lie about that?_

 _Because he's evil- he killed Dumbledore._

 _But he made the unbreakable to protect Draco and look out for him._

 _That doesn't mean he's good._

A chime sounded.

 _I have to see him_ , thought Hermione and she went outside into the oasis.

The sky was still dark. She could see the first hints of sun coming up in the one corner. Was the sky in here in time with the sky outside?

There was no walkway across the water now and so Hermione jumped in and swam across to the other side. She was thankful for the water washing away the blood. She was thankful for this place and for Draco thinking of her…

She paused.

How long had Draco known about the curse?

Hermione blinked wiping the water away from her eyes. Draco had kept it from her and had worked on a way to keep her safe. That's why he had made the doorway. That's why he had shown her his oasis... He had prepared... for this.

"Draco Malfoy you great git," she sobbed. If she had known they could have worked together, she would have had more time to find a cure…She collapsed in the sand and cried again.

"You're turning into a regular watering pot," she told herself and wiped away her tears.

She had every reason to cry though: everything was wrong.

Heading to the door she peered through the small hole. She could see Draco laying on the bed. His body was covered in small black veins.

"No..." Hermione breathed almost silently.

There was something about actually seeing him laying there so still and so hurt that made everything in her chest squeeze tight.

Narcissa was there beside him. Hermione watched as the witch cast spell after spell. Healing charms and counter curses one after another.

Narcissa's hair was unkempt and hanging around her face. Her eyes were red and dark circles hung underneath.

 _She loves her son,_ thought Hermione.

 _She's killing herself trying to save him._

It was obvious that Narcissa was pouring every ounce of magic she had into keeping Draco alive and trying to save him.

Hermione debated stepping out and helping Narcissa, but she couldn't bring herself to move.

If she stepped out now she would give away Draco's secret and there was a chance that Narcissa wouldn't even let her close.

No, she had to wait. Eventually Narcissa would fall asleep of have to go to the washroom, then Hermione could go to Draco. Hermione took a breath. She would come back then.

Hermione cast a small charm making a little bird. She told it to sit and wait silently for Narcissa to fall asleep and then to come to her and let her know when it happened. The little bird let out a chirp and Narcissa looked to the window and the rising sun. She rubbed her eyes.

"Draco," Hermione heard the older woman say. "Draco my darling, please, fight, please."

Hermione felt her heart break for the older woman and it took everything she had to pull herself away.

Hermione walked back through the oasis. This time she tapped on the dock with her wand and was relieved when it listened to her and extended out over to water and to the island. She went inside the hut. Memories of being there with Draco, of sitting on the couch and leaning into him swept through her.

She wanted to go back to that moment.

Instead she went back to the cellar. Where she came face to face with Greyback.

* * *

Narcissa was still bent over Draco when the Dark Lord came into the room.

"My lord," said Narcissa bowing. "Thank you for coming."

"Of course," said Voldemort. "How could I not for one of my most loyal families?" he smiled and Narcissa felt the cold she always felt in Voldemort's presence.

"Save him please," she begged.

The Dark Lord looked at Draco's form. He was pale and thin and covered in black veins.

"Who cast this curse?" asked Voldemort.

"Ronald Weasely," answered Snape stepping out from behind the dark Lord and moving over to the side of the bed.

Draco looked much worse letting Snape know the end was near. It was already remarkable how long the young man had lasted. He was still alive, most were long dead this long after the curse being cast.

"Potter's friend."

"Yes," said Snape.

"Is it the Deatheater's bane?" asked Voldemort.

"Yes," said Snape.

"Then there is nothing I can do," said Voldemort shaking his head. "It appears young Draco's time has come."

"It feeds off the mark," said Narcissa grabbing hold of the Dark Lord's arm. "If you removed the mark perhaps…"

"Silence woman," he flung her backwards. "How dare you suggest such a thing!" he bellowed. "My mark is permanent, my mark is forever as I shall be. It is an honor for Draco to die with my mark on his flesh. His loyalty will be remembered."

"Please," Narcissa begged. "Let his loyalty be remembered while he lives."

"You do not know what my mark is Narcissa. You never took one yourself," he sneered at her. "And I will not remove my brand once it is burned into my Deatheater. Draco is mine. Forever."

"You said Will not," said Narcissa standing. "Not CAN not!"

"I will not therefore it DOES NOT MATTER," said Voldemort.

"IT MATTERS IF YOU CAN SAVE MY SON AND ARE CHOOSING NOT TO!"

"Cissy," Bellatrix reached for Narcissa. "Calm down."

"I WILL NOT!" Cried Narcissa and she drew her wand.

Snape stepped in front of Narcissa and Bellatrix stepped in front of the dark Lord.

"My lord," said Bellatrix. "She is not in her right mind, he is her only son. He is my nephew, surely you can be compassionate."

"I will be," said Voldemort. "For your sake," He looked down at Bellatrix. "This one time only." And then he vanished.

Narcissa screamed and slapped Snape.

"You promised, you promised to look out for him."

"I did everything that I could," said Snape.

"Cissy, it's going to be alright," Said Bellatrix

"My son is dying. Nothing will ever be alright again!" Narcissa turned back to the bed and Draco's sleeping form. "Get out, all of you."

"Narcissa…" Lucius began

"GET OUT NOW!"

The room emptied leaving Narcissa alone with her son.

She would never forgive them.

Not the dark Lord for refusing to remove the mark.

Not her sister for not understanding.

And not Lucius for getting them mixed up in this in the first place.

She lay her head down by Draco's side and wept.

* * *

 _No..._

Hermione's blood ran cold.

She was here in the cellar with the man who had tried to rape her.

"And where did you go little girl?" Greyback's growl sent shivers down Hermione's spine. She held her wand tightly behind her back out of view.

He had seen the passageway.

Hermione couldn't let him keep that memory, if she did it would make everything Draco had done to try and save her totally worthless. She couldn't let that be.

She didn't bother to answer Greyback and instead lifted her chin and face him strait on.

"I've been waiting," he said coming forward. "For them to put you back down here," he smiled a sharp and wicked grin. "I even left a little something here to let me know when that day came just so I wouldn't miss it." He picked up a small statue and smashed it against the wall. "Won't be needing that anymore," he said grinning.

"You need to leave now," she said, having every intention of obliviating him the second he turned around if he did.

"I am not going anywhere," said Greyback. "And neither are you."

"Draco will kill you if you touch me," she said with conviction.

"Draco is upstairs dying a painful death. There is not one to stop me."

Greyback came forward.

"There is me," said Hermione and she lashed out with her wand. "Stupify."

Greyback deflected.

"You little bitch, where did you get that wand?"

"From one of your dead friends no doubt," said Hermione.

Greyback snarled and lashed out with his wand. The curse was clumsy and Hermione parried it. Light shot around the room as they fought. Hermione was at a disadvantage not using her own wand. Still, this wand served her well enough. It help up for her power, not like the one she had broken cursing Draco.

Her distraction at the memory made her slip and she missed parrying one of the attacks. The spell hit her shoulder and she let out a cry of pain.

Greyback took that moment to launch himself forward at her and Hermione went down to the ground. Her wand went skittering across the floor.

She pushed with everything she had and Greyback went flying off her from the force of her wandless magic. She scrambled across the floor and grabbed hold of the wand just in time to turn and see Greyback launching himself at her again.

She raised her wand and yelled.

There were no words to the spell only fear and anger and strength. A great light came from her wand and Greyback flew backwards slamming into the wall. He was clearly dazed. His wand dropped to the ground and he shook his head trying to clear it.

Hermione stood and brushed herself off then she went to Greyback and grabbed his wand from the ground beside him and quickly backed away.

 _What do I do now?_

"I will kill you," said Greyback. "You wait and see, but first I'm going to have you and fuck your little cunt until you beg for death."

"How many women have you done that too before?" Hermione found herself demanding.

"I don't keep count," he smiled wickedly. "But I always have the hunger for it."

 _He's a monster…_

"You will never get the chance to do that again," said Hermione and then she did something she had never thought herself capable of.

Hermione Granger uttered the killing curse.

* * *

Snape came back several hours later to check on his dying pupil. He found Narcissa sitting there, utterly ragged from exertion.

He went to Draco and cast a quick spell checking Draco's vitals.

Narcissa looked up at him as Lucius crept into the room behind him.

"He has hours at most," said Severus answering her unspoken question.

"Are you sure?" asked Narcissa not wanting to believe the words and at the same time knowing Snape meant what he was saying.

"Yes," Snape nodded. "He has lasted much longer than most already," he sighed and then continued "Most succumb within the first twenty four hours, by my count he is close to forty eight."

Narcissa looked down at her son. If she looked long enough she could see the small incremental growth of the veins darkening and climbing through his body. The pink swelling around them made Draco's skin seem puffy and swollen even though he himself looked thin and frail.

While she cast spells she could halt their progress, but she could not work around the clock and every breath between spells gave seconds for the curse to grow.

And she could not remove the dark mark.

 _What is there left that I can do?_ She asked herself and then it came to her.

Narcissa stood. There was something left that she hadn't tried. Something that had been in her family for generations.

"Stay with him a moment would you Severus. Do what you can." Snape nodded tightly. Lucius was sitting in the corner healing spells were not his forte and Narcissa was not about to let him try on their son while he was on the edge.

She walked down the hall to her bedroom and went to the vault she kept hidden behind her grandmothers portrait. Her mother looked down at her.

"You've come for my necklace haven't you?"

"Yes," answered Narcissa. "It is for your grandson."

"Very well," she said swinging open. "At least it will stay in the family."

Narcissa opened the vault and pullout out the small jewelry case therein. She opened the old leather box and looked down at the diamond encrusted necklace. The diamonds alone were worth nearly half a million galleons. It was the piece in the center which glittered and caught the light that held the true value though. Inside the small dandling glass pear rested two Phoenix tears. She carried the necklace back to Draco's room.

"No," said Lucius getting up. "You can't use those!"

"And why not?" demanded Narcissa.

"Its a curse not an injury," said Lucius. "There's a chance it won't even help and those tears are worth more than five years investments put together."

"Fuck your damned investments!" yelled Narcissa. "This is our son. If there is even a chance that they will buy him an extra hour. A second awake so that I can tell him one more time I love him then it is worth every single penny."

"But-"

Narcissa lashed out with her wand as Lucius went to protest.

"If gold is all you want then gold you shall have, but not my love or my boy. Get out."

Lucius scuttled out of the room his eyes wide with fear.

Narcissa knelt by her son's leg.

"You know he is right," said Severus. "Phoenix tears can save from the brink of death any injury, I don't know their effect on a curse like this-especially one attached to the dark mark."

"Are you telling me you are sure that they won't help?" asked Narcissa looking Snape straight in the eye.

"No, I'm just trying to make sure you know there is a chance that they may do nothing."

"I understand that," said Narcissa and tears filled her own eyes. "But he is my son. I need to try."

Severus nodded and Narcissa twisted the stem of the glass pear jewel and then she poured the two tiny tears onto the wound.

There was a shimmering and the black hole that had been ooozing black closed itself up. The black veins however did not move or dissipate. The swelling around them went down.

A moment passed and Draco's eyelashes fluttered. He blinked up at his mother his breathing ragged.

"Mom?"

"I'm here Draco. I'm here darling," she said clutching his hand.

Draco shivered.

"I'm so cold," he murmured.

Snape cast a charm and the room heated drastically.

"Draco darling," Narcissa smoothed the hair over his forehead. "I love you. You know that."

"I know," Draco coughed. "I love you too mom."

Tears leaked from the corners of Narcissa's eyes.

"Please stay with me," she begged.

Draco gave a weak smile.

"I'm trying."

"You're my everything," she kissed his hand and Draco's eyes fluttered closed again his breathing going even.

Narcissa looked to Snape.

"You bought him a few hours I''m guessing," he said. "But I can't be sure. The tears healed all the swelling and the wounds but the curse remains and its only a matter of time before the swelling returns."

"It was enough," said Narcissa. She lay her head down on the bed next to her son, tears sliding silently down her face. "It was enough."

* * *

Draco could hear them talking.

He could hear his mother's agony.

And he could do nothing.

As she wept next to him Draco slipped into a dream.

Draco was a golden statue, shining brightly in the sun. He sat high on the hill looking out towards the city. Everywhere he looked there were people who needed help and it tortured him because he was a statue he could do nothing.

Fred was wandering around unable to see. The redhead was missing both eyes. Somehow it hurt Draco more than he would expect to see Fred that way. He felt his heart ache inside his golden chest.

A Phoenix came and alighted on his shoulder.

"Hello," she said and Draco recognized the voice as Hermione's.

It was nice to have her here with him.

"Hello," he said back.

"You're a very handsome statue you know," she chirped.

"Yes, but I have no power. I can't move and I can't do anything. I'm trapped."

"And what would you do if you could move?" she asked preening her beautiful fiery feathers.

"I would make you happy," he answered honestly, because that's all he wanted now, Hermione to be safe and happy.

"And how would you do that?" asked the phoenix.

 _Any way that you wanted, I would give you anything that you asked for-anything that you needed or wanted._

"I would take the jewels in my eyes and give them to Fred so he could see."

"But then you would not be able to see," Protested the bird.

 _But you will be happy...and that is what matters._

"Take one then, and give it to him, he can have half of me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, he needs it," said Draco. "He is in the dark and it will make you both happy to be able to see one another."

"Very well," said the phoenix with Hermione's voice and she plucked out on of Draco's eyes. Even though he was a statue somehow it still hurt.

The Phoenix came back as the sun set.

"Will you stay with me?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered and went to sleep beneath the shelter of his feet.

The next morning he saw Harry fighting Voldemort only instead of fighting with wands Voldemort was chasing Harry with a great sword.

"Hermione wake up!" called Draco and the Phoenix opened her eyes.

"What? What is it?" she asked.

"Harry needs help, he needs a sword to fight the dark lord. Give him mine," said Draco.

"But it is attached to your arm," said Hermione.

"Then take my arm."

"But you need your arm," she protested.

"I am only a statue and he is flesh and blood. He needs it more than me and you need your friend in order to be happy."

"Very well," she said and took his arm and the sword with it and even though he was a statue somehow it still hurt.

While she was gone Draco's legs began to tarnish and turn black. He felt the creeping of the dark taking over. He had little time left he knew, and he needed to make sure of one thing before he left. He needed to know that she was safe and happy.

When she returned he asked.

"Are you happy?"

"Almost," she said.

"Will you stay with me another night?" he asked as the sun set.

"Yes," she answered and she went to sleep by his feet.

Draco did not sleep that night though, he stayed awake all night watching over her.

As the sun rose Draco saw that Ron was laying on the ground on a distant field. There was a great spike through his chest and he was calling for help.

"Hermione wake up."

"What? What is it, what's wrong?"

"Ron..." Draco paused.

 _If you say this you will loose her._

 _Yes...but its the right thing to do...its what she would want._

"Ron needs you," it choked him to say it.

The Phoenix flew to Ron. Draco watched as she dropped her tears on the wound. She sat perched next to Ron for several moments and then she flew back to Draco perching at his feet.

"I cannot save him," she said and he saw her cry.

"Why?"

"The spike is through his heart. He needs a new one."

Draco looked at Hermione and before his eyes the Phoenix shifted and grew taller. It became the woman he loved. She was wearing a beautiful red dress which sparkled in the light.

He looked her in the eyes.

There was no one else in the world who had eyes like hers.

There was no one in the world who he loved like her.

"Will you be happy if you can save him?" asked Draco, his throat feeling tight.

"Yes," she answered. "I will be happy."

Time seemed to slow and Draco made his decision.

He took a breath.

"Then take mine," he finally said.

"What?"

"Take my heart, it is already yours."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

And with that Hermione reached into Draco's chest and pulled out his heart.

And despite the fact that he was a statue it hurt more than anything else he had ever felt before.

He watched as she walked away and used it to save the man she loved.

This time she did not come back to him.

He watched as the two of them walked off into the sunset hand in hand.

If he still had a heart in his chest it would have broken. Instead he was hollow.

Numb from the pain.

The black from his leg crawled up his body and the statue slowly crumbled into ash.

Unlike in the story of the happy prince where the sparrow and the statue ended together…his story did not end with Hermione.

When his dream was over, Draco was nothing.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. I totally cried while writing the last part of this chapter. Literally tears coming down my face as I wrote it. I hope you enjoyed it as much as you could or maybe felt like it was cathartic.**

 **By the way, the next chapter has something many of you have been waiting for...**

 **Also side note: Deletrius was used after the 442nd Quidditch cup to remove the image of the Dark Mark from the sky.**


	39. Chapter 37: The Choas Inside

**Wow, a massive thank you to:** addictedtoloveandfiction (welcome back) Danielle804, Addfam2008, Addfam2008, Thehumanlibrary , Aid4, MoonlitRose731 , inkwolf199 (I still adore your reviews) Toraach, Aikello, ChildofBrisingr, alluringmango, .co, Horses8 , Rclaw00, apls79 , mmiller0000, Cruellica, IanAlphaAxel, mega700201, LovEToReadit, AnayaR, Iwillsingyoulullabys, Kotodashi Kyoshi,Fanficfan826 , Ayr, tomfeltonswifey, Ambearlamb, aliciaeiram, Thaxiuh, LillsBills, roon0, RotcehM **and the guest** "Who" and "MVD" **for taking the time to review. So many people took the time to review last chapter and I really, really appreciate it so much you guys.**

 **I am happy to know that people enjoyed last chapter and that it was able to be something that you all "Felt" art is about creativity, but its also about connections so thank you for connecting and sharing this with me. This chapter is a little chaotic (hence the title) I hope that I have done a good enough job of writing it clearly that you can follow along and see what I saw in my head as I was writing it down. Enjoy.**

* * *

Chapter 37: The Chaos Inside

The swelling came back gradually. Narcissa looked on in silent horror as a pink swelling began to creep outwards from the veins on Draco's body.

 _There has to be something I can do,_ she thought miserably, _something…anything_

She knew in her heart there was nothing. The tears of the phoenix were her last and only hope. They had bought her a few moments with her son and while she had said it was enough a few hours ago to Snape, seeing the swelling return made her heart constrict painfully and made her face the truth:

No amount of time would ever be enough.

Narcissa wanted to watch her baby grow up and get married.

She wanted to see cute little grandchildren run all around the house.

She did not want to lose Draco, he was her whole world. She would do anything for him.

If it came down to it she would take his place.

Narcissa Malfoy would rather die than loose her son.

"You should rest," came Snape's voice from across the room.

"I can't…" said Narcissa even as her eyes burned from keeping them open far too long.

"I will watch over him," said Snape. "I will do what I can and I promise I will wake you if anything…changes."

"I don't want to miss a moment with him," said Narcissa.

"I don't want you to miss a moment, but if you don't rest now there is a chance that you will miss his final moment."

Narcissa let out a small sound of anguish at Severus words. She knew it was true. She knew the end was coming and she would not, could not let Draco face it alone. If she was going to lose him then she was going to be there holding his hand when the time finally came.

"You promise you will wake me Severus…" she managed, her voice cracking.

"You have my word Narcissa."

Narcissa looked up at him.

"I failed," she said a tear falling down her cheek.

"We all failed him," answered Snape.

"I should have never let Lucius pull us all back into this…I should never have let Draco get the mark."

"If you had interfered with the Dark Lords will it would have ended poorly for all of you. He used Draco to punish Lucius and he would have used you as a tool for his own machinations had you put a toe out of line."

"But at least then Draco would still be alive."

"You can't know that," said Snape. "The Dark Lord might have killed you all as an example."

"I can't lose him Severus," said Narcissa. "I won't survive."

"You are strong Narcissa, I believe you can."

Snape was not wrong, Narcissa was strong…but without her son there was no reason to be.

She lay her head down beside Draco and holding his hand in hers she let exhaustion pull her into its arms.

* * *

The sensation of flying still lingered in Hermione's limbs as she slowly woke. She remembered the glittering orange of her wings and the uplifting feeling of beating in strong strokes against the azure sky. It gave her a feeling of immense peace...and then everything came back to her and she jerked fully awake. The cold floor of the cellar had chilled her over the evening and she shivered rubbing her arms. She looked to the small charred mark on the cellar floor where Greyback had lain before she had disposed of his body.

She remembered the hollowness of his eyes staring vacantly outwards and she felt colder than the floor had made her.

 _You had to do it,_ she told herself.

 _No you didn't,_ her mind answered back, _you could have just wiped his memory and knocked him out._

Hermione bit her lip.

She had never imagined herself capable of killing and now she had the blood of two men on her hands.

One had been self defense, she had been dealing well with that one all things considered. Every time her mind had brought it back up she had told herself that it was kill or be killed, that she hadn't had a choice.

With Greyback she had, had a choice and she had chosen to end his life.

 _He was a monster,_ said her brain darkly. _What he tried to do to you he had already done to countless others. You couldn't let him live._

 _Was that my decision to make?_

 _It doesn't matter, what is done is done and you never have to worry about him again._

But what if someone asked where Greyback had gone? What if when all this had blown over somehow his death was traced back to her?

 _Then you can claim it was self defense again._

 _This is war Hermione,_ this time the voice in her head sounded like Draco. _You need to be strong._

"I'm trying to be strong," she whispered aloud. "I need you to be here to stay strong."

 _No you don't,_ his voice answered back. _You are the strongest woman I have ever known._

Hermione closed her eyes.

"I wish you were here right now."

Silence answered her and Hermione let out a shaky breath before she checked out the top of the stairs and then went over to the wall and took the route through the oasis to Draco's room. The little bird she had set as a spell greeted her as soon as she opened the wall and chirped around her head.

 _Good,_ she thought, _that means that Narcissa is finally asleep or away._

Hermione crept over to the pinhole in the door of the wardrobe and looked out at the bed where Draco lay.

Narcissa, who Hermione was sure had been casting spells all night, had passed out next to Draco; her head laying on the blankets beside his chest while her hands gripped his asleep the lines of worry were etched into her face.

Snape was standing by the bed wand in hand muttering something as a white light drifted down from his wand onto Draco.

 _Draco trusts him, maybe you should too._

 _Don't be stupid Hermione, he killed Dumbledore._

 _But he made an unbreakable vow to protect Draco and look out for him, so if that's what you are doing..._

"If you are planning on coming out Ms. Granger now would be the time."

Hermione froze. How did Snape know she was there?

 _You can face him now, or you can run. If you run you'll never get to say goodbye to Draco…_

Hermione steeled herself and gripped her wand tightly. She stepped out and faced him wand at the ready. He did not seemed phased in the slightest at the fact that she was armed and pointing her weapon straight at him

"How-" she started to ask.

"The bird," he answered and his eyes flicked to her. "I heard it chirping."

"But there are lots of birds around here..." Hermione protested.

"Yes," answered Snape. "Few of them linger in wardrobes." Snape stopped casting the spell and turned to face her fully. "I see young Mr. Malfoy succeeded in making his door." he paused. "Am I to assume that the other exit is in the cellar?"

"You gave him the book," said Hermione.

"I did," answered Snape.

"And you knew I was there."

"I did."

"And you didn't turn me over?"

"Your powers of observation, Ms. Granger, seem to be intact even if you common sense has been somewhat rattled by the events of these past few weeks," he tucked away his wand. "Pray tell, what were you doing lingering in Mr. Malfoy's wardrobe?"

"Hiding."

"That I gathered," said Snape almost rolling his eyes at the obviousness of her statement. "You were supposed to be in the cellar if memory serves."

"Yes, well..." Hermione didn't know how to answer. Snape knew about the passageway but something told Hermione that he was not aware of the oasis and she was not about to betray Draco's biggest secret. Well, the biggest secret other than him having feelings and trying to protect her.

Snape raised an eyebrow.

"Do you have a plan Ms. Granger or..." he looked back to Draco and then returned his dark gaze to her, "are you simply here to say goodbye?"

"I don't have a plan," admitted Hermione defeated. "I've spent hours reading and there is nothing about that curse anywhere."

"That is because great lengths were taken to ensure its disappearance."

"So how did Ron know about it?" asking the question that had been bothering her since she first found out that Ron was responsible for Draco's current condition.

"That," said Snape. "Is something I have been wondering myself."

Hermione felt her shoulders slump at the lack of a real answer.

"It doesn't make sense," Hermione said more to herself than to Snape.

How had Ron found out about a curse designed to kill Deatheaters and leave normal witches and wizards with nothing more than a sting? Had he read it somewhere or was there someone who still knew of the curse who had told him about it? If so, who knew? And if Ron knew did that mean others in the order knew the curse as well?

Narcissa stirred and Snape cast a quick sleeping spell before turning to Hermione.

"I do not wish to deprive Narcissa of a single waking moment with her son...however...if you wish to say goodbye now is the time."

Hermione felt her chest squeeze.

 _I don't want to say goodbye..._

 _You also don't want to live the rest of your life knowing you had the chance to say goodbye and missed it._

 _They say people in comas can hear you..._

Hermione walked forward toward the bed. She knelt on her pallet on the opposite side as Narcissa and picked up Draco's hand.

It felt cold and Hermione felt the cold down to her soul.

"Draco..." she said his name and her voice cracked. She didn't know what to say.

Goodbye wasn't enough.

Thank you wasn't enough and she couldn't say everything she wanted and needed to with Snape standing right there.

All at once a little light went off in Hermione's brain.

She pulled out her wand and pointed it and Draco's face.

 _He let me in once, I can only hope that he'll let me in again._

"What are you doing Ms. Granger?" asked Snape, his voice wary.

"Saying goodbye," she answered and then with a push entered Draco's mind.

* * *

Draco lay alone in a white room.

He was on a gurney and it was cold and hard against his back. He felt like a corpse in a morgue.

He tried to sit up and barely managed to even with the considerable effort.

The evil of the darkness pulled at him and he felt himself flicker and looked down at his hand to see it blink in and out of existence.

 _When I die where will I go_? He wondered to himself and then he thought of Hermione.

 _I hope she runs_ , he thought and lay back down.

He needed her to be okay.

He closed his eyes.

 _I only wish I could have said goodbye…_

All of a sudden there was a blinding white light and Draco blinked.

 _It can't be…_

"Hermione?"

* * *

Everywhere Hermione looked were tendrils of black clinging to the white walls like cobwebs dripping with a thick black sludge. Hermione stepped forward towards Draco and the black seemed to hiss at her. She raised her wand and it backed away. She became immediately grateful that she seemed to have taken it, or at least the illusion of the wand, with her into his mind.

She came to the gurney and saw that the black was all stemming like a great riot of branches from Draco's leg.

"Draco." she called his name and ran over to him.

"You came back…" he said blinking up at her like she was some kind of an angel.

"I never left," she answered.

"But you did, I gave you my heart and you used it to save him."

As if spurred by her words the whole room shifted and swirled and vanished giving way to a village in a valley. She watched in horror as she picked off pieces of Draco and gave them to her friends.

She heard his last words and felt the agony behind them.

"Take my heart, it's already yours."

Hermione let out a cry as she saw a version of herself reach into Draco's chest and pull out his heart.

"No!" she protested. "No." but her other self could not hear her and she watched as she used Draco's heart to heal Ron and then walked off with Ron into the sunset. She felt all of Draco's pain, felt him as the statue crumpled into black. Felt how he lost himself in the black.

Hermione whirled around to find that her real Draco was no longer beside her.

"DRACO!" she called out. She spun around again looking for him. "Draco where are you!?"

"I'm here," his voice was soft and came to her from a distance. She spun around once more to find him lying where the statue had been, in a pile of black that slowly sank into the earth. She ran over to him and crouched down beside him grabbing hold of his hand.

"That's not the real me," she said.

 _I wouldn't do that to you,_ she thought and a strange expression fluttered across Draco's face which let Hermione know that this was like the last time she had been in his head. The Bind allowed them to hear each other's thoughts.

 _You will…_ answered Draco silently back in thought and then he opened his mouth.

"It's what will happen when I'm gone," answered Draco. "It's okay," he said sounding tired. "I think I would rather not be around to see it."

"No..."

There was a pause. Hermione looked to the sunset and thought of what Ron had done.

 _He did it because he thought Draco was hurting you._

 _Yes, but a killing curse?_

She shook her head. Could she go back to someone who would use magic like that offensively?

"He did what he thought was right," Draco answered her unspoken thougts.

"But it wasn't right," protested Hermione.

"If I weren't a Deatheater it wouldn't have really hurt me," said Draco. "It's my fault."

"You didn't choose to be a Deatheater," protested Hermione.

"But I did," answered Draco.

"You didn't want to be though."

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions," quoted Draco. "And what I have done is more important than what I have wanted to do."

A thought flickered through the air, but it was too fast and to faint for Hermione to catch it. She thought of what she had done.

 _You killed Greyback._

 _That's different,_ she protested.

"You killed Greyback?" he paused a heartbeat. "Good," he said and thenlooked at her sideways tilting his head. "Are you the real you?" Draco asked breaking the silence.

"Yes," answered Hermione. "I killed him just before I came to find you." She touched his hand. "And yes, I am the real me."

"How do I know for sure?" he asked.

"I don't know," said Hermione. "Do I feel real?"

"Yes," he answered and coughed. Hermione saw black around his lips and fear trickled down her spine.

All of a sudden the world bent and shifted again Hermione felt slightly nauseous as colours, scents and sounds swirled into a spiral.

When the world shifted back into focus she saw an image of herself and Draco standing in the oasis of his wardrobe.

Hermione didn't remember being ever being in the oasis at night dressed like that. She saw herself wrapped in a light pink sarong and holding a pair of sandals in her hands. The Real Hermione watched as the other version set them down nonchalantly and made her way across the beach towards Draco, her hips swaying gently as she walked.

"What's going on?" she asked.

Her Draco turned towards her and looked at her sadly.

"A memory," he answered softly.

"I don't remember being here with you like this."

"You weren't," he answered and then looked up at the memories. "Not really anyways."

"I was wondering when you'd show up," The other Hermione said coming closer.

"I didn't mean to make you wait," Memory Draco answered automatically.

Hermione watched as the image of herself smiled and lifted her arms and wrapped them around his neck as if she had done it a thousand times before. She stared up at him, eyes open and welcoming.

"Do you like it here?" he asked.

 _I do,_ Hermione answered silently. Draco's head whipped towards here and he was staring at her, clearly having heard her thought through the bind, while the other version of her answered him in the background.

"I like being with you,"

 _Did you mean that?_ Draco asked without moving his lips.

 _Yes,_ answered Hermione.

"Did you miss me out in the real world?" The other Hermione asked and real Hermione turned to watch her fluttering eyelashes at him.

"Every minute," he answered and touched his forehead to hers. "Did you miss me?"

"Desperately," she breathed and swayed against him her arms squeezing tighter.

Hermione felt her cheeks warm with embarrassment even before memory Draco spoke again.

"Prove it," he said and Hermione felt through the bind just how much he wanted her too. How he was aching for her. The emotions-his emotions- were swirling through her.

Hermione watched as they kissed and then the memory Draco got a strange look on his face.

She felt a coldness go through him and through her.

 _This was where I realized it wasn't really you,_ Draco thought at her loud and clear.

"Granger?" she saw him ask.

Fake Hermione smiled, the look more plastic than real.

"Fuck Granger," Past Draco let her go stepping back. "No…this isn't real. It's just a dream."

"It is like a dream come true, being here with you."

"Shut up," past Draco yelled at the dream version of Hermione. "You're not her."

"But I can be," she wrapped her arms around him once more.

"No," Draco snapped. "You can't be..."

Present day Hermione felt sick to her stomach again, only this time partially because that's what Draco had felt. He had felt nauseated knowing it she wasn't real.

 _But he was dreaming of you like this…_

She wrapped her arms around herself.

 _I'm sorry,_ Draco spoke into her mind and she could feel the intense wave of his grief and embarrassment of her seeing this. He was embarrassed because he felt weak for wanting or dreaming it.

"Draco," the fake Hermione called to him.

Real Hermione looked up at real Draco and she touched his face.

 _Please don't feel that way,_ she quietly begged.

"What are you doing dreaming about a Mudblood!" his aunt screeched and Hermione jerked away from Draco in fear, her head whipping around to the scene near them. Bellatrix reached for the other Draco's neck. He tried to pull her off but she clawed at him opening up great gashes on his skin.

"Aunt Bellatrix no, please stop. It wasn't what it looked like."

"Blood traitor!" she screamed and slashed him again.

The scene shifted again and Hermione dropped to her hands and knees. Her hands splashed into several inches of water and as she looked down she saw blood trickling towards her. Hermione looked up and saw Draco laying on the on the ground in bathroom surrounded by water. He was bleeding, and bleeding and the pain…god the pain was so much. She could feel it too and it made her want to cry.

"Draco make it stop," she cried falling on to the ground.

"I can't" he answered and she realized that her Draco was the one laying on the ground bleeding. Somehow he had gone from standing inside her to reliving this nightmare.

Snape was pouring something else into the wounds; something that began to boil and burn and fester melting his skin in black bubbles. Draco screamed and so did Hermione.

The black bubbles grew and grew until they rose up in the form of a great black leach.

"NO!" Yelled Hermione and she threw herself over Draco's body.

There was a great thump and they were back in the white room. Draco was on the gurney and Hermione lay at top him. She shook with the violence of the memory of the pain and with the overwhelming onslaught of emotions coming at her from both the memories and the Draco who was laying beneath her now.

She felt like she was trying to hold on to her own mind in the middle of a mental hurricane.

"What was that Draco?" asked Hermione climbing off of him.

"It was my nightmare from the night you woke me up with a slap."

"Oh..." said Hermione reeling. That was the nightmare she had slapped him awake from.

"I didn't mean for you to see it," he said. "Everything feels so chaotic here."

There was a pulse through the black and Draco's back bowed off the gurney. He let out a cry of pain and Hermione ran back to him and threw her arms around him holding him as he writhed.

"Draco," she called his name, not knowing what else to do.

* * *

His body let go and he slumped back shivering.

"Why are you here?" asked Draco finally when the shivers had stopped. He needed to know why she was here.

He needed to know why she had come.

"I came..."Hermione swallowed. "I came to say goodbye."

"So I am dying then," he said and gave a small nod. It made sense. A part of him had already know the truth. "I thought as much," he continued. "I feel like I've been slipping in and out of existence," he closed his eyes.

"Draco," her voice sounded anxious and he could feel her pain and worry through the bind.

"Yes?" he opened his eyes and looked up at her. She was so beautiful. It was almost like he could see a golden light coming off of her. He smiled reaching up to touch her hair.

 _She has the most wonderful hair…_ he thought feeling the silk of the strands between his fingertips.

Hermione blushed and Draco realized she had heard him.

 _Careful what you think,_ he half yelled at himself.

"It's okay," said Hermione, but he could feel a trickle of discomfort.

"No its not," answered Draco. "I don't want you to remember me like this."

"I don't want to have to remember you," she said and he heard the truth of the words. "I want you to stay with me."

 _Of course she does,_ thought Draco, _she's worried about how she'll get out without you._

"That's not true!" protested Hermione. "I could get out on my own right now. I have a wand."

 _But I'm staying for you…_

Draco heard the thought loud and clear and it made his throat go tight.

 _She can't mean that._

 _I do,_ she answered back.

"Please don't go," she said out loud squeezing his hand. "I don't want to lose you." _I want you to stay with me,_ he heard her add silently.

It made his chest squeeze.

She cared. Here inside his mind where, with the bind, he could feel her. He could feel that she wanted him to stay.

It was the greatest gift she could give him before he went-the knowledge that she didn't want him to go.

"I don't think I have much of a choice," he said and offered her a weak smile. Then his thoughts turned darker: _I never have much of a choice..._

The world started to shift.

 _No, he thought, please don't take her there…_

It seemed even here within his own mind, he didn't have a choice.

* * *

The world tilted again, swirling in a vortex of colour and sound and Hermione felt herself almost wretch from the force of it.

All of a sudden the motion stopped and Hermione opened her eyes and Froze.

This she remembered:

It was her first day in the mansion.

 _I don't want to be here_ , she thought.

"I don't want you to be here," answered her Draco out loud. He took her hand and they tried to turn away and run and slammed into some kind of an invisible wall. Draco slammed his fist up against it and the black leach appeared on the other side and hissed. The floor rotated beneath their feet and once again they were facing inward looking at their past selves.

"Take her down to the dungeon," said Lucius trying to pull himself neatly together. He smoothed out his hair with a shaking hand. "Make sure she doesn't get out."

"Wait," said Greyback drawing everyone's attention. "Does no one remember she's supposed to be mine? My reward for catching Potter?" He smiled a wolfish grin at Hermione. "You're going to be worth it. I can smell that pretty little-"

 _He's a monster,_ thought Hermione.

 _He is, and he's gone,_ answered Draco. _Thanks to you._

 _Did I do the right thing?_

 _I can't answer that,_ said Draco. _But at least he won't hurt anyone else or be able to touch you ever again. I'm glad for that, and if that makes me evil so be it._

"While you were passed out on the floor circumstances changed," Past Draco interrupted, in the most posh and condescending tone

Hermione felt a blast of emotion slam into her from past Draco. All past Draco wanted to do was rage at the werewolf and tell him that he would never touch Hermione while Draco was still around. Of course saying that would be as good as handing Granger over to them. If anyone in the room thought for one second that he was trying to protect her he would be labeled a traitor.

 _You were trying to protect me from the first moment…_ thought Hermione.

 _I didn't know what I was doing_ , answered Draco, _or what I was supposed to do. All I knew was I couldn't let him have you._

"I don't see how they could have changed that much," Greyback brushed off his coat and stuck his chin forward "I want my fun."

"I don't see why that would be an issue," said Bellatrix with a quirk of her brow. "We only have to keep her alive."

The tension in the room was starting to get to Hermione. She didn't want to relive this. She didn't want to see what was to come. She could feel the chaos of her own emotions layering with Draco's in a feedback loop and it felt like it was tearing her apart from the inside out.

"Stop this please" begged Present Hermione taking hold of Draco's hand. His hand felt frail and small in hers. "I don't want to remember this Draco."

"I can't stop remembering it," he answered.

The scene continued to play out around them.

"STOP!" She yelled at the room at the top of her lungs.

Suddenly everyone in the room was looking at her. It was as if they were inside a play and the fourth wall had been broken. Present Hermione looked at her Draco and then she walked over to her past self and drew her wand and swung it elegantly. The old Hermione vanished.

The others in the room gasped.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" asked past Draco with a sneer.

There was none of the kindness that Hermione had gotten used to in this Draco.

This boy standing in front of her half shaking with fear was not the strong, honest caring man she had fallen for.

 _Hermione, what are you doing?_ Her Draco asked in her head.

"You stay out of this," past Draco yelled at present Draco. "You're weak!" he yelled. "You let her see!"

"You are not weak," said Hermione looking at the present Draco. "You are one of the strongest, most caring, most incredible men I have ever met."

"You can't say that!" said Her Draco. She could feel the agony her words created in him as strongly as she could feel that he needed to hear them here and now in order to believe the truth. She needed to tell him because he needed to know that he was not a monster.

"Yes I can," said Hermione back.

She turned to past Draco.

"He is as strong," she told him. "And someday you will be too."

"But he's going to die!" protested past Draco.

"It's worth it," said present Draco, and Hermione looked back over her shoulder at him as he spoke. "Its worth it...For her."

Hermione felt her heart pound in her chest.

 _He thinks I am worth it…worth everything he's been through…but I'm not._

 _I'm not._

* * *

Present Draco balked at Hermione's thought

"Yes you are," said her Draco and he walked slowly over to Hermione.

 _How could she think for one second that she's not everything? How can she not know?_

"I'm not everything Draco," said Hermione. "I'm just a girl. I've hit you, I've hurt you. I've yelled at you and called you names and killed people. I don't deserve to have someone do what you have done for me."

"Yes you do," said Draco taking hold of her hand. He looked down into her eyes. "You are the most incredible, brilliant beautiful woman I have ever known Hermione Granger. Knowing you, is something worth dying for. I wasn't really alive until you came along." He stroked a thumb across her cheek. _You are my everything._

Draco bent his head down towards Hermione. She did not pull away.

 _Let me kiss her,_ he thought, _one last time..._

"You're soft on her!" Bellatrix yelled breaking the moment before their lips could touch.

"Like hell I am!" said past Draco. "Give me a wand." The request rang through the room. "A wand, someone give me a wand," he demanded and held out his hand waiting.

Draco and Hermione turned to face the room holding hands.

 _I won't let them hurt you,_ said Draco, inside Hermione's head.

Narcissa came forward and handed her wand to her son. Her expression was hard and unreadable. Draco turned to Hermione who simply stood facing him staring him in the eyes.

"You think I'm soft on her?" past Draco asked looking at Bellatrix. He smiled his most wicked grin.

 _"Forgive me Granger,"_ past and present Draco Echoed at the same time.

"I already have," she answered squeezing his hand.

 _You are the best thing that has ever happened to me,_ he answered squeezing her hand back.

"CRUCIO!" yelled past Draco.

Time seemed to slow.

Present Draco stepped forward.

He tucked Hermione behind him.

He stepped in front of the spell

He took the blast of the curse full force.

* * *

 **And there you have it. Real honest emotions being voiced between them. (All it took was Draco having to be on deaths door) I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. If you did you are likely going to like the next update...so stay tuned.**

 **Thanks so much for reading. Let me know what you thought. Cheers.**


	40. Chapter 38: The Profession

**700!? Wow guys. Thank you so, so much. Last update this fic cracked 700 reviews and 700 for followers. You are all so freaking amazing. Shout out to** Aid4, MsBeast, mega700201, apls79, .co, tayann93, mmiller0000, Amblure100p , Bloodred 321, inkwolf199 , addictedtoloveandfiction, BeYourOwnLivingHistory, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Jen7, IanAlphaAxel, Fanficfan826, LovEToReadit, tomfeltonswifey , AnayaR, Aikello, Horses8, Ayr, LillsBills ,Moongrl088 **And guests** "D" "Who" **and** "Guest" **For taking the time to review, and thank you to everyone who thinks this fanfic is worth having alerts sent to you to let you know a new chapter is up. (or keeping a tab open on your phone/computer just to come back and check)**

 **I'm updating early this week because It is my partners birthday tomorrow and I will not have time to do it then. Also as a big thank you for hitting 700 I will be doing** **A DOUBLE UPDATE** **this week. (Also, while this chapter is fairly long [6k+] the next one is a little shorter so I figured you all would be happier with it as a bonus... work for you?)**

 **Again, this Chapter flips through memories because we are still in Draco's head. I hope its clear enough and not confusing... I did my best.**

* * *

Chapter 38: The Profession

Snape stood looking at Hermione. She was frozen with her wand extended outwards towards Draco. Her eyes were closed. The stillness of her posture let Snape know that her conscious mind was not actually in her body. He had no doubt in his mind that Hermione was currently taking a trip inside of Draco's mind.

 _I wonder when she learned Legilimency_ , he pondered.

Severus's eyes flickered over to where Narcissa was laying sleeping.

Should he wake her? Should he stop Granger from romping around inside the boys mind?

 _He's already going to die, what could she possibly do to make things worse?_

 _He's in love with her_ , his mind said plainly, _you know that he would want to say goodbye. If you had a chance to say goodbye to Lilly…_

Snape's face hardened. He couldn't think of Lilly now. Everything was far too complicated. He didn't need a distraction, what he needed was to keep the Potter boy safe.

 _Safe long enough so that he can die when Dumbledore intended,_ his mind taunted.

Snape's chest grew tight and he sucked in a breath.

How could he just let Harry Potter die?

 _He's just like his father, you shouldn't care._

But Snape did care. He cared enough to do things that he never would have imagined doing for anyone else. He did those things for Lilly's memory. It didn't matter that she was gone, he still would do anything for her.

He had looked out for Potter, despite his infuriating attitude, for years because that was what Lilly would have wanted.

If she was somewhere out there, looking down on them-because if there was a heaven Severus Snape was certain that Lilly was there- he could only hope that she could see that his love was true. His love had always been true.

 _"After all this time?"_ Dumbledore's question echoed in Snape's ears.

 _"Always."_

It was the answer then, and it was the answer now, it would be the answer till the life left his body. He would always love Lilly… and he had seen that kind of love in Draco for Hermione. As much as Snape was at war within himself wondering what was right, he knew that to pull the two in front of him apart was wrong.

 _He is the same position you were…_ thought Snape. _He loves her and she has chosen that useless Weasely boy._ Snape sneered. Hermione might have no magical lineage, but she was still far too brilliant for a wizard like Ron, at least in Snape's mind.

And yet…here she was. Snape looked down at Hermione.

 _She's here because she cared enough to risk discovery in order to say goodbye._

Snape looked at the wand and looked at Granger.

She had a wand, she could have simple dissaperated. Draco was about to die anyways. The Bind would end with his death and Hermione would be free to return to her friends and the order without the risk of being tracked.

 _Is there a chance she might return his feelings?_ He wondered.

 _Narcissa isn't going to like it when she finds out._

Snape turned away. Narcissa loved her son, she wanted what was best for him and that, in her mind, meant someone with the same pedigree.

 _I doesn't matter, she's never going to find out,_ said Snape back. _Because Malfoy is going to die._

It hurt Snape to think about it. Draco Malfoy was one of his favourite pupils. True the boy was stubborn and cocky… he was also a brilliant wizard and a genius of potions. Draco had been through so much and given everything that had happened and the unrequited love…Snape felt an extra kinderence to the boy.

 _His love for the girl has made him stronger,_ he glanced back at the frozen tableaux.

 _Too bad it hasn't made him strong enough,_ Snape bit his thumb.

 _His love for her is probably why he has lasted so long when others died quickly from the curse…_

 _Now you are just being foolish,_ he chastised himself and he scoffed turning back towards the window. It was Dumbledore who believed that it was Lilly's love that had saved Potter, not Snape.

 _If anyone's love was strong enough to save someone it would have been hers…_

Snape closed his eyes and a single tear slipped out from beneath his eyelid.

 _I would give anything to have been able to save her…anything to have been able to say goodbye…_

He looked down at Draco.

 _At least they both have that…._

* * *

Draco and Hermione both felt the pain from the curse in so many levels and in so many ways.

Seconds felt like forever until they were wrenched out of the memory of that first night and slammed back in to the white room where they began.

They crashed into a mass of the black web. It snapped and hissed like a wet log on a fire and Hermione let out a cry as the black veins burned her skin.

Draco grabbed hold of her firmly yanking her away from the webs and the pain. Staggering he went down to one knee a few feet away from her. Hermione looked at him as she clutched her burnt arm to her chest.

His body was thin and frail and his breathing ragged. He looked so much worse than before.

 _Are these dreams and the pain just visions of what the black is doing to him? Is everything bad that happens to him here just a reflection of the curse?_

Draco didn't seem to hear her ponderings. He looked like he was in his own world just trying to pull himself back together.

Right in front of her he blinked out like a hologram flickering in and out of existence.

"NO!" she yelled and lunged towards him throwing her arms around his shoulders. She burring her face in the side of his neck. "Don't go."

His form became more solid under her touch.

"I think I am going," he said and she heard just a slight waver to his voice.

 _You can't go, you can't leave me._

This time she could tell he heard her.

 _I don't want to leave you,_ he answered her mentally.

Hermione pulled back.

"Why is it that the voice inside my head feels more like you than the one that I hear when you open your mouth?" she asked, the sound of desperation was evident in her tone.

"Maybe because it's the real me, or at least the purest form of who I am," he snorted. "Though calling me pure in any capacity would be a mistake."

 _That's not true._

"We both know it is," said Draco and the world shifted again swirling and twisting violently.

Hermione heard the darkness growl and then they were back in the oasis again. Draco was carrying her in his arms across the beach. Unlike the previous times in the memories and dreams this time they were both back in their respective bodies re-living the memory. Hermione felt Draco's strong arms around her and remembered thinking it was like something out of a romance novel to have him carry her like this across the beach away from Fred.

"Mmmmm," she hummed and nuzzled closer. She had almost forgotten how nice he smelled...

Draco shifted and Hermione realized he was struggling carrying her.

 _Don't drop her_ , she heard him order himself and she realized that she was going to hear and experience Draco's version of the night.

 _No, I don't want him to see this, I don't want to re-live this embarrassment, thought Hermione._

 _You have nothing to be embarrassed about,_ Draco thought at her.

 _Yes I do…_

"I can walk," she said her mouth automatically opening and saying what she had said that night. She felt oddly like a ventriloquist dummy. The sensation of speaking without intent to speak was incredibly disconcerting.

"It's alright," Draco answered. "We're almost back."

 _Don't let her see. This was a good night, don't make her worry_ , Hermione heard Draco think and she recognized it as a thought from the past as opposed to something Draco was thinking now. There was a difference of tone to the memory thoughts. Her Draco, the one who was dying had a more breathy sound.

 _Why didn't you just tell me?_ She demanded of him mentally. _We could have tried to find a cure together._

 _I think a part of me knew there was no cure from the start,_ answered her Draco.

"I don't want you to hurt yourself," Hermione found herself saying aloud even though all she wanted to do was wriggle out of his arms and talk to him about what was going on. She didn't want to re-live this night. This time she was the one who felt trapped and vulnerable.

 _It's okay, he won't hear your thoughts unless you let them slip._

 _I won't look deeper,_ he promised, in response to her thoughts.

"I'm fine Hermione," past Draco said, his took on that bossy tone she remembered.

She felt worried and cramp-y all over from the stress.

 _What are you worried about?_ asked Draco. _You have nothing to be ashamed of. So you had a little too much to drink. It wouldn't be the first time that happened to a good witch._

 _That's what you think,_ she shot back unintentionally.

 _What?_

"O-kay," Hermione's mouth popped open and drew the word out into two long and distinct syllables. She felt Draco's amusement at her drunken state. It was completely at odds with what they were both feeling now.

 _She's so cute drunk,_ she heard him think. _It's just like the night of the wine and steak. It was worth it to go hungry to see her happy._

 _You went hungry?_ Present day Hermione demanded. Her head reeled. _That steak was supposed to be yours…_ she said putting two and two together. _Draco why would you let me eat your meal?_

 _You needed it more than I did,_ present Draco answered back.

A feeling swept into Hermione.

 _That was the first time in your life that you went without a meal…._ she said mentally. She wasn't sure where the thought had come from, but a part of her just…knew. Maybe it was intuition or maybe it was the fact that she was in his head, either way she felt sure of her statement.

There was a silence as Draco walked.

 _Wasn't it?_ She asked needing confirmation that she was right.

 _Yes,_ answered Draco honestly.

 _Why?_ she asked.

 _I told you there is nothing I wouldn't do for you,_ said Draco. _I meant it._

They walked along for another length. Hermione remembered falling asleep at this point, but they were in Draco's memory and so she got to experience his walk back to his room.

She could feel him worry about getting her back without waking her. She could feel him struggling to carry her and getting mad at himself because it usually wasn't hard for him at all.

 _Be careful with her,_ past Draco thought at himself as he gently laid her down on the pallet.

"No," she mumbled and wrapped her arms tighter around his neck. "I want to sleep with you."

 _Fuck_ , she heard him think.

 _She doesn't know what she's saying, she's too drunk._

 _Merlin if only she would say that sober._

 _Don't think about it Draco, she's never going to want you like you want her._

All of Draco's thoughts shot rapid fire through Hermione's brain and she blinked.

 _That's what you were thinking?_ She asked baffled.

 _Yes, I'm sorry, I'm only human,_ said Present day Draco in her mind, _and you were clinging to me…._

 _I wanted you,_ answered Hermione mentally.

 _You were drunk,_ countered Draco.

 _I wasn't that drunk!_ She immediately regretted thinking those words because she could feel Draco trying to process them. And then he was moving.

Hermione froze as she realized that Draco was shifting away from her to hide the effect his words had, had on his body.

 _He had wanted her too._

Hermione's head reeled as she tried to process the new information coming at her. True she had thought that maybe, he might have just trying to do what was right. However, it was a completely different ball game to be inside his head and see that it had been a struggle for him.

 _Be the good guy,_ she heard his memory echo. _Do the right thing_

 _Why?_ His mind demanded back. _She's right here and willing. You can just blame it on the alcohol-you know that's what she'll do._

 _I would never hurt her like that._

"I don't think that's a good idea tonight Hermione," his voice was gentle but firm. "You're drunk and I've had a couple glasses myself."

Hermione yanked Draco down.

 _Fuck_ , she heard him think, _she feels so good._

 _Just give in._

 _I can't, I can't hurt her._

 _I don't want you to be hearing this_ , present Draco thought at her. His mental voice was hard. _Push us out,_ he said. _I'm trying but there is something holding us here._

Hermione knew what it was. She knew they couldn't leave this memory because she was holding them there. It was unfair. She couldn't help wanting to see what Draco had thought and felt in this moment.

 _It's wrong of you to keep him here,_ she thought to herself.

 _You're the one keeping us here?_ He asked and she felt his confusion through the bind.

And then she felt his lust from the past as she pressed her body against his. She turned her face into his neck and inhaled.

"You smell good," she murmured into his skin, her lips feathering against his neck with each word. She felt the electricity crawl through Draco's skin. She felt his lust pulse through his whole system at her words and with her actions.

Present day Hermione could only blink. She could not process that the night she was so embarrassed about acting out of turn, wanting him…he was also wanting her…craving her.

It was one thing to think and wonder about it and it was a completely different thing to find herself re-living the moment and being able to feel just how much he had wanted her, and boy had he wanted her. She could feel it singing through his veins.

She could feel the ache that he had felt in his dick.

He wanted her more than he wanted to breathe.

 _Merlin help me,_ both past and present Draco echoed simultaneously as he trembled. _._

 _Gods Hermione you're so fucking beautiful. You have no idea what you are doing to me,_ thought past Draco.

 _Please let us out Hermione_ , present Draco pleaded with her, but Hermione was too caught up in the moment to try and pull them out from the memory.

"What's wrong?" she asked, the words from the past popping out of her mouth as she pulled back.

 _What's wrong is that you are slowly killing me…_

 _What's wrong is that I want what I can't have._

 _What's wrong is that I have the one person I want writhing in my arms and she's too damn drunk to consent._

She reached up and kissed him yanking his head towards her.

Draco's world froze. She clung to him like he was some kind of a life line. He felt like lightning was racing through his veins. Her arms tangled round his head and her legs came up and looped around his hips holding him close.

Present Hermione got lost in the lust and found herself experiencing the moment as if it were the first time. She wanted Draco. She wanted him too.

 _Hermione,_ both past and Present Draco thought her name like a prayer at the same time.

Lines began to blur as they both were pulled in so deep that it was hard to tell where the past ended and where the present began. They were just there. holding each other and kissing and everything was right in the world for a moment.

Draco let out a groan and he kissed her back.

 _Yes_ , they all thought simultaneously.

 _This is it, this is right. She is everything,_ Hermione heard Draco's voice in her head and she couldn't tell if it was him now, or him from the past. She decided it didn't matter.

This felt right. Everything about this felt right, from the way that her body felt bellow his, to the silk of her hair in between his fingers; From the softness of her lips to the softness between her thighs as her legs wrapped around his so deliciously.

This was better than any dream.

Draco mouth opened and he took over the kiss his hand fisting in her hair he yanked her head back and tasted her lips.

Hermione groaned into his mouth and the sound went straight to Draco's dick.

 _You need to fuck her till she begs for more…till she craves you like you crave her._

 _No,_ Hermione heard past Draco protest splitting from the present.

All at once he was pulling back from her, pushing her limbs away and untangling her legs from around him.

 _She deserves more than this. She deserves more than you. You're an asshole taking advantage of a drunk girl. If you do this she will never, never, forgive you._

"What's wrong?" she asked sitting up.

 _How can she not know what's fucking wrong?_ Hermione felt Draco's anger and frustration through the bind.

"You're drunk," Draco snapped. His tone was like a bucket of ice.

"I'm sorry..." tears welled in her eyes.

 _You fucking asshole, don't make her cry just because you can't control your prick._

 _You need to let her know that you don't just want her for her body…_

"I don't want to kiss you like this," he said hoping she would understand.

"I know."

 _She knows?_

"I think I need to be sick," she said and practically ran past him to the bathroom. She slammed the door shut behind.

 _Crap,_ he thought _. I…I hope she's okay._

 _You're an idiot, you shouldn't have let her kiss you. She just realized what she did and its made her fucking sick._

 _Can you blame her?_

 _NO!_ protested present day Hermione and she found herself standing on the other side of the door waiting with Draco as he looked at the door miserably worrying about past her in the other room and if she was okay.

 _What do you mean no?_ asked Present day Draco. _I saw what happened to you. The second you realized what you had done you ran to the bathroom. I heard you wretch behind that door._

 _That wasn't why I was sick._

 _So you drank too much, all the more reason to blame this on me for not stopping it before it began,_ argued Draco.

 _You don't have to be perfect for me Draco,_ Hermione protested.

"Hermione are you okay?" asked past Draco. She could feel his worry and concern like it was living creature between them.

"I'm fine," past Hermione answered. "Don't come in."

 _She hates you_ , he thought.

"I didn't hate you," she said out loud.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked the Hermione behind the door.

"I'm fine!" that Hermione snapped.

 _She doesn't sound fine,_ thought past Draco

"I wasn't fine," said Hermione. "I was in there thinking that you didn't want me."

"In what world is that a logical thought?" Demanded Draco. "It was so fucking obvious that I wanted you," said Draco. "I had a hard on the size of the fucking Eiffel tower for you that night."

"You made it clear to me once before that, that was only a physical reaction," said Hermione darkly.

Draco frowned at her, clearly frustrated

There was silence for a moment.

"I'm sorry," said Draco said turning and speaking through the door, somehow Hermione felt like he was saying it to her as well.

"I don't want your damn apology Malfoy," past Hermione called back.

 _I don't know what else to do,_ thought past Draco. _I don't know what else to say._

Silence again.

His chest ached. He paced on the other side of the door waiting for her until he was worried he would wear out the carpet and so he sat on his bed and twiddled his thumbs trying to figure out something to say to her when she finally emerged.

 _Tell her it's not a big deal,_ thought past Draco.

 _Maybe she didn't notice how much she affected you…_

 _Yeah, sure, she's drunk not stupid._

When she came out he was sitting on the side of his bed waiting for her.

"Hermione-" he started but she held up a hand stopping him from saying whatever he was going to say.

"I'm going to bed. We both had a lot to drink, let's just pretend that didn't happen and focus on the fact that the rest of the night was good."

 _It's for the best,_ he thought, _let her think that was it. Let her blame the wine._

 _You were stupid to think even for a second that she actually wanted you. That was just the alcohol talking_.

"Okay," said past Draco and the memory faded slowly...

* * *

Present Draco started to cough. He blinked out again and the world spun and shifted until they were back in the white room. Draco coughed and coughed until black ooze was spewing form his mouth and nose.

"Draco!" Hermione called out and went to him.

"Don't." he said waving her off.

 _I can't bear to have her touch me after seeing that._

 _I don't want her to remember me as some weak, puppy mooning after her…_

"Draco that's not what I will remember you as!" she protested.

"Stop reading my thoughts!" he yelled.

"I'm not!" she yelled back. "They are just here in the air like mine," she gestured wildly around her.

"Well you're not the one being turned inside out."

"My whole world has been turned inside out!" shouted Hermione. "Do you have any idea what that night was like for me huh?" she asked him, helping him stand, "I thought you didn't want me and that you were turning me down."

"What?" demanded Draco looking at her like she was some kind of an imbecile "Are you crazy?"

"No, but you never said you wanted me. You made it quite clear that you didn't"

"I told you that I didn't want to kiss you 'Like that' not that I didn't want to kiss you."

"Yeah well I didn't catch that little difference!" yelled Hermione.

Draco went to say something and bent over and vomited black instead.

He flickered in and out of existence like a faulty hologram.

"No!" protested Hermione and she threw her arms around him once more.

"Don't," he protested. She could feel his feeling, she knew that he was hurting. She also knew he was fading faster. How long was a minute in here? Was it the same as a minute out in the real world? How long had she been in Draco's head? Hours or minutes. She shook her head, it didn't matter how long. She wanted longer.

"I can't let you go," she answered back.

She wanted to hold on to him and never let go. She also didn't know what would happen to her if she were to stay here after he died.

"Don't risk it," he said quietly. "I don't want you to get hurt staying with me till the end. You came you said goodbye, that was enough."

It wasn't enough for Hermione: she needed to know, before he went, what had actually happened the night Ron had cursed Draco. She needed to see for herself what had happened.

Was it selfish? Perhaps, but she needed to see to believe that Ron had done something so dark.

If he really had…how could she be with him even with Draco gone?

Hermione took a deep breath...

"We can see anything here?" she asked. "Anything that you have been through?"

"Yes," answered Draco. "At least I think so," he glanced at the pulsing black of the leech. "I don't know if it will let us see anything…but it is my head so I would think…" he trailed off and then looked at her. "You want to see that night," said Draco. "Don't you."

"Yes," answered Hermione. "Please. Show me what happened."

"I don't know if I can control it. It like I'm being shuttled through my life at random, not like when I just let you in where I was trying to show you one day…one memory."

She could feel the hesitation in him.

He didn't want her to see. He was worried what else she might see. He hadn't wanted her to see that last memory and yet it changed so much for Hermione to know that it hadn't been one sided that night.

"Try please," she begged.

"Alright," he finally answered. "If that's what you want…" There was a sadness in his voice that made Hermione almost want to take back her request. Before she could say anything else the world tilted and spun once more. This time more violently than before.

When the world stopped Hermione's head felt like it was about to crack open with the headache inside. She held her temples while Draco did the same. She saw him flicker. He went to his knees. She went to him and wrapped her arms around him gently.

This memory they sat and watched like a live play.

Past Draco sprang out of the chair he had been sitting on and shot to his feet. Several members of the order came bursting in through the main door and another came in through the window that had just been cracked in. An older man took one look around picked up the box Draco had delivered and disapperated

"VLADIMIR!" An attractive woman, who Hermione somehow knew was named Nikita, yelled. A curse caught her across the side of the face and she screamed.

Another curse whizzed near Draco's head and he deflected a second one before it could hit him. His wand was warm and ready in his hands.

A woman from the order came at him and Draco parried and then flung his wand outwards sending the woman careening through the air and into the nearest wall.

"Malfoy!"

Hermione froze. It was Ron. His eyes were filled with such hatred.

A fireball exploded next to Draco. The shock wave sent him flipping sideways into the chair that Vladimir had previously been sitting in. Draco landed painfully feeling his ribs crack with the odd angle of impact.

 _You can't kill Ron,_ thought past Draco, as anger and pain boiled in him. A part of him wanted to though. He had never liked the redhead and now he was the only thing that could keep Hermione from staying in his life.

 _He's going to kill you._

Another curse flew through the air at him and Draco managed to parry it flicking his wand out behind him just in time. He dropped to the ground and rolled. With a flick of his wand he sent out a stunning spell.

Ron deflected it and cast a counter curse. Draco ducked out of the way.

"I'll fucking kill you!" yelled Ron letting out a yell and flinging a strike out at Draco. Draco deflected it sending the energy out to the side so that it blew a hole in the nearest wall.

Hermione shuddered. She had seen Ron mad before…not like this.

She felt the moment past Draco started to panic. He was far outnumbered and this time he didn't have the advantage of his enemies thinking he was on their side. In the woods he had been able to use that leverage against the death eaters. Here everyone wanted to kill him….and he didn't want to kill them…

 _They have reason to want you dead…_

The thought distracted Draco.

Ron lashed out casting an incantation Draco had never heard before. In the memory the words were muddled and Hermione could not hear them clearly.

Pain bloomed through Draco's leg and he let out a cry. Hermione reached down to her own leg as the pain blasted through her in the memory.

Past Draco lashed out with his wand instinctively.

The counter spell sent Ron flying into the ceiling. The redhead crashed back to the floor unconscious. Hermione gasped.

"Don't worry, I'm sure he's fine," said Draco quietly and she felt a ripple of pain go through him.

 _I'm not worried about him right now,_ she couldn't help but think and Draco turned his head to look up at her.

 _You're so beautiful_ , he thought up at her and Hermione blinked down looking into his gorgeous eyes. She could see the pain and the fatigue wearing at him and yet those eyes were still so clear and captivating.

Tonks and Remus came in to the room with a loud bank and Hermione and Draco turned to watch Past Draco face them.

She could feel how Draco had been a little surprised, and grateful, that Potter wasn't with them.

"Surrender now Malfoy," Tonks flung Draco back against a wall. His head impacted with a resounding thud. He struggled to raise himself up of the ground.

 _You have to get back, you have to make it back for Hermione._

 _You have to get back to her…_

Hermione felt her chest squeeze again. He was thinking of her. In the middle of battle fighting for his life, all he was thinking about was getting back to her.

"You're coming with us," said Remus. "You need to answer for what you've done."

 _Yes I do, but not now_ , thought Draco _. I can't leave Hermione alone._

Determination from thinking of Hermione lent strength to his limbs and Draco pushed himself up off the floor and stood to face his opponents. His leg felt like it was on fire.

"Not going to happen," said past Draco and he lifted his wand. He felt the warmth flow through him and spun the wand around his body, once, then twice sending everyone outwards. Every door in the house opened, ever window shattered.

Hermione blinked.

She had felt that power. It was different.

 _That wand…_ she breathed mentally. _There is something special about that wand._

 _Yes,_ said Draco. _Bury me with it won't you?_

"Don't say that!" said Hermione out loud.

There was a silence in the room when Draco's spell finished.

She could feel how badly his head hurt. Past Draco reached back and felt the lump from where he had impacted. When he pulled his fingers back there was blood on them. He looked around him and the world tilted to the side.

Draco dropped to his knees and the world spun out into black.

* * *

Hermione basked in the calm, this didn't feel like the dark black ooze this felt nice.

 _It did feel nice,_ Draco said in her mind. _It's the only reason I'm not more terrified to go, maybe if I'm lucky this will be how it feels this time._

 _You almost died then didn't you?_ asked Hermione.

 _My heart stopped,_ Draco answered back. _And then I heard your voice..._

 _I told you to come back to me._

 _Yes._

A light appeared.

 _Come back to me now Draco,_ said Hermione.

The light gave way to white and they were back in the gurney room.

"Why are you here?" asked Draco.

"I came..."Hermione swallowed. "I came to say goodbye."

"It's time to die then," he said and gave a small nod. "I thought as much. I feel like I've been slipping in and out of existence," he said and closed his eyes.

"Draco," her voice sounded anxious even to her own ears.

"Yes?" he opened his eyes.

"Please don't go," she said squeezing his hand

"I don't think I have much of a choice," he said and offered her a weak smile. "I never have much of a choice..." he murmured and the scene changed again

Fear flicked across Draco's face and suddenly they were standing in a room with his father

"Again!" Lucius yelled and Draco cast a spell creating a snake. Hermione recognized the spell as the one he had used against Harry in the dueling match that Lockhart had proposed.

The Snake only lasted a moment before it dissolved.

"Again!" Lucius hit Draco hard across the face. "Do you think you can slack off when you have the filthy mudblood beating you!?" He hit Draco again only this time it was a blow that knocked him over.

"I'm sorry," cried Draco and Hermione felt the pain and the shame radiate through young Draco, that shadows of which were still etched into his soul.

"Sorry isn't good enough," bellowed Lucius. "I said again," Lucius whipped out his wand and cast the spell. A larger cobra appeared and bit Draco.

Draco screamed.

"NO!" Hermione yelled and stepped forward. She soon as she came too close to the memory it faded in wisps of coloured smoke. "No," Hermione was still calling.

"It's okay," Draco wrapped his arms around her in comfort.

"No its not," she sobbed turning into his embrace. "He should be locked away for treating you like that."

"It doesn't matter anymore," said Draco, his voice soft and frail.

"Yes it does! You shouldn't have to carry memories like Draco."

"I won't have to carry them much longer," he answered and gave her a sad smile.

"You should never have stood up for me," Hermione shook her head. "You've been through enough. You should have just let Bellatrix kill me."

"Don't you ever say that!" yelled Draco. "Never!" he shook her by the shoulders. "I would die a hundred times over for you..."

Draco blanched seeming to realize what he was saying, he dropped his arms to the side and staggered away his feet barely holding him up.

"Why?!" Demanded Hermione following him.

"Because..." Draco swallowed.

 _I can't say it. I can't say it_ , he murmured mentally.

"Why Draco, tell me why?" she pushed. Tears were falling down her face.

She needed to know.

She needed to hear him say the words.

 _I can't…_

"Why Draco?" she practically screamed.

She could feel his heart wrench in his chest.

"Because I love you!"

* * *

 **And there you have it. Draco has finally said the words out loud and told Hermione that he loves her. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please review and tell me what you thought of it. I'll be back later this week that BONUS/ THANK YOU-UPDATE.**

 **Speaking of love. I love you all and that you are here sharing this journey with me...its not over yet I hope you want to read more... and I hope**


	41. Chapter 39: The Act of Love

**Thank you:** inkwolf199, blackdeath49, Aikello , apls79, Aid4, mega700201, tomfeltonswifey, Amblure100p, addictedtoloveandfiction, youngar994, .babe, Starearth, ElizColl, jacpin2002, Qween87, Ayr, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Jen7 , laureenkatebautista, CatPeach, cbacon1972, Rclaw00 , AnayaR, LovEToReadit, Shortie McBealle, Horses8, Fanficfan826, RotcehM, LillsBills a **nd guests** "D" "Who" and "Guest" **For your reviews, they are all appreciated. It makes me happy to know that so many of you are enjoying and that so many of you believe in love. (I do to, I am a total romantic)**

 **Here is your Bonus update. I hope you enjoy it and stick around for this coming Sunday/Monday to see where things go from here. This chapter was supposed to be short...its not...**

 **Warning: This chapter contains violence and nightmare sequences.**

* * *

Chapter 39: The Act of Love

 _"_ Because I love you _,"_ the words burst out from Draco's mouth.

 _There,_ thought Draco, _you said it._

 _You finally said it._

A great terror that gripped at his chest as he looked down at her.

 _At least you got to say it out loud one time before you go,_ his mind thought fleetingly.

There was a moment of silence where Hermione just stood looking at him.

 _Does she hate me for saying it? Have I ruined the chance at being a fond memory?_

Draco felt like his whole being was inside of a pressure cooker and every passing second of silence increased the feeling tenfold.

"Well go on and say something," said Draco. "Do something," he half begged half yelled. "Tell me I'm an asshole, punch me in the face. I don't care what you do to me don't just stand there and do nothing."

Instead of hitting him or lashing out Hermione threw her arms around Draco's neck and her mouth crashed into his.

Bliss.

Colours exploded behind his eyes and Draco FELT Hermione.

He felt her reeling emotions, he felt her passion, her sadness and affection. He could sense that she felt everything he was feeling too. He was certain it was something to do with her being inside his head and the bind that held them to each other.

With a low groan Draco gave in.

Every ounce of resistance left his body as he wrapped his arms around her and pressed their bodies so close that not light could pass between them.

Draco had no idea where he would go when death came to claim him, all her knew was that heaven could not be better than being here in her arms kissing Hermione for real. Even if it was only in their heads he could feel her she was right there with him. She was just as rocked by the kiss.

For once Draco wasn't worried about how she would feel about kissing him because he could feel, how she felt about kissing him and she wanted to kiss him. She wanted to hold him. Draco felt her tears between their lips. He could taste the sweet salt of them on his tongue as their tongues danced together.

 _I will never love anything or anyone the way that I love her_ , he thought and Hermione pulled back. He could see in her face that she had heard his thoughts.

"You are everything," he said aloud. "Promise me you'll make it out alive. Promise me you'll go the second I die," he begged. "I need to know you'll be okay."

"I don't want to leave you."

"You won't be leaving me," he said and kissed her lips gently. "I won't be here to leave behind."

"But I need you," she protested.

'I need you', not 'I love you'. The difference of words felt monumental to Draco.

Draco felt his heart squeeze. She didn't love him, but she hadn't run at his proclamation and he could feel that she wasn't mad about his love.

She didn't hate him and it felt good to be certain of that fact. She cared for him, he could feel it down to his bones, and somehow it was both enough and not nearly enough.

"I'm going to kiss you now," said Draco and he looked at her. "I have never kissed you," he said and looked down at her lips.

"Yes you have," she protested. "You just did."

"No," he said and gave her a tiny smile. "I've kissed you back," he shook his head. "I can feel it in you that you've felt like I didn't want you, like you weren't sure if I cared about you," he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Well, if this is the last time I get the chance, let me be perfectly clear," he swallowed and closed his eyes.

 _It's now or never Draco._

"I love you," he said and opened his eyes to look at her. "I love you more than I have ever loved anything or anyone in my life. And I want you. Merlin, I want you so much some days that it physically hurts to think about it. When I go I want you to remember that you redeemed a soul that was lost and you pulled love out of someone who was never capable of it before. YOU ARE my world Hermione Granger. You always will be."

Hermione was crying and she choked out a sob at his words.

"Shhhh," he soothed and kissed the tears on her cheeks, then he took her face gently in his hands and moved slowly until their lips finally met.

* * *

The Brandy snifter in Lucius Malfoy's hand was full far past the point of being socially acceptable. It had been refilled several time already and the amber liquid sloshed to side with each step he took. The thick leather bound volumes on the shelf seemed to blur before Lucius eyes and he stumbled towards the fireplace and collapsed in his chair spilling several drops onto the deep burgundy carpeting. He never read them, they were just for decoration. Lucius, like ever Malfoy before him for the last several centuries, had inherited his money. He hadn't needed to work to get it, he had only needed to marry and produce and heir to ensure the line continue. Now that line was coming to an end.

"My son..." he slurred. He tried to focus on the flames. His vision was bleary. What was to become of Lucius legacy? He had put so much time and work into the boy. He was just yet another investment that hadn't paid out. His mind drifted back to Narcissa and the wasted Phoenix tears. She knew how much they were worth! If they had saved Draco it would have been worth it, but it was a stupid gamble. Phoenix tears were for healing wounds not canceling curses.

"My wife..." he muttered angrily and took a sip. There would be no more children from her. She had made that clear years ago. Without her he could only have bastard children and the pure-bloods would not recognize them in the same way. A bastard Malfoy would still be considered 'one-of-them' but would be relegated permanently to the lower echelons of good society and Lucius couldn't allow that to happen to the Malfoy name.

He threw the glass at the fire place and the brandy exploded in blue flame.

She had yelled at him and told him to get out. How dare she speak to him how she had?He was a Malfoy, he deserved better. He was better.

Narcissa had always known her place, at his side, supporting him. She had always done well and held that place with dignity and decorum.

Not now.

 _It's because you've stooped so low,_ a dark voice whispered in his ear.

 _If you hadn't failed then Draco wouldn't have been called upon to serve._

 _It's not my fault,_ he protested, _Draco failed on his own._

 _He's been failing for years coming in second to that filly bitch of a mudblood,_ Lucius told himself. _It's not your fault. You did everything you could to fix him._

 _And now he's bound to her._

 _Not for long..._

"No," Lucius protested out loud and he went to the crystal cabinet that housed his liquor and poured out another glass. He took a great swig of the liquor and coughed as it burned going down the wrong pipe.

"Don't move," came a voice from behind him.

"What?"

Lucius turned and a spell slammed into his chest.

* * *

Draco bent his head down slowly towards her. Hermione had every chance in the world to pull away and instead she let their lips meet.

If Hermione had thought that kissing Draco was good before she had never felt something like this.

His lips were soft and warm and brushed against hers, once, twice and then he stroked the tip of his tongue along her bottom lip. Her lips parted automatically, but instead of just diving in he kissed her again, a gentle brush a little more open mouthed than the first few. Their breath mingled and Hermione shuddered. Draco shifted and tilted her head back and Hermione let out a moan as he pressed more firmly against her, open mouthed kisses one after another each one more firm and yet still as agonizingly sweet as its predecessor.

Hermione's arms began to move restlessly over Draco's chest as he continued the slow onslaught. Then his tongue was inside her mouth caressing her with slow easy strokes. Hermione let out a moan. It was like she could feel the kiss singing through the rest of her body. She wanted to be closer. They weren't close enough. She needed to be a part of him. Her arms wrapped around him and squeezed him tight pressing her breasts up against his chest.

It was Draco's turn to let out a moan and she felt it rumble from deep in him and into her. A warm feeling of satisfaction rushed into Hermione as she heard and felt his approval.

All of a sudden she felt the pull of danger through the bind and Draco pulled back doubling over. She watched and held him as he blinked in and out of existence, fluttering in shudders closer and closer together.

"Draco please," she begged as she lay him gently down on the ground. "Please don't leave me." Panic seized her veins.

 _No, not like this…_ She thought.

Draco shuddered and she felt him grow colder.

"If I didn't think that thing was going to eat me whole," said Draco gesturing weakly to the dark. "I would promise to stay as a ghost, just to watch over and out for you."

Hermione choked.

How could she have ever thought he didn't care? She could feel it in him. She could feel how much he cared. She could feel…his love.

How had she not seen it before? It was more than caring, it was more than lust. Draco's love for her was so strong, it surrounded and enfolded them in a warm embrace.

The cold rushed over then like an arctic wind and the black curse began to close in on draco like a hungry hunter opening its giant maw as it lurched closer.

"You stay back!" Yelled Hermione and she lashed out at it with her wand. The spell hit it and stunned it for a moment but it kept moving forward.

"It's okay," Draco took her hand. She could feel how he was trying to comfort her even with his last breaths.

"No its not," Hermione shook her head. "I won't let it take you."

Draco smiled weakly up at her.

She could feel that he knew what was coming. She could feel the fact that he had already accepted his fate. Something about that fact made Hermione feel like she herself was dying.

"Just kiss me one more time before I go," he said gently. Everything about his demeanor told her he didn't want her to be upset.

 _How can he think of me at a time like this?_ She thought.

 _Because you're my everything_ , he answered back simply.

Hermione reached out for him taking her hand in her own and lacing their fingers together. Draco gripped her hand tightly. He looked over her shoulder at his coming doom and suddenly he felt calm.

 _It's okay, it's all going to be okay_ , he heard his thoughts echoing around them.

She opened herself up to him and could feel how terrified he was to go. How scared he was of this blackness, of the thought of it destroying his soul and making it so that he would never be able to see her again.

That was his fear...his only fear was not seeing her.

If he was going to go he wanted his last memory to be of her not of the darkness...he wanted it to be of her. Even though he was terrified, she could sense that a part of him was at peace completely.

Hermione looked down into his eyes and a thousand volumes worth of words passed between them. In that moment Draco and Hermione knew and saw each other's hearts...each other's souls.

Hermione smiled through the tears and bent down and kissed him holding his face in her hands.

The tenderness blocked out all the dark for a moment.

His heart swelled.

He could feel her in the kiss: The light of her soul shining through.

She could feel him, and the love that overflowed from his heart, surrounding them.

When the kiss was done Draco let his head fall back on the cold ground, to tired and weak to hold it up for a moment longer. She saw in his eyes that he was ready for the end.

"I love you," he said again softly.

"I know," said Hermione pulling back from him. She looked in his eyes.

He had done so much, she thought, he had given me everything…Hermind went to all the things that he had done in order to protect her-save her. Inside his mind she could see flashes of everything that he had endured and still he had become this incredible man who was willing to die for her without complaint and without demanding that she give anything in return.

He loved her without expecting anything back.

He loved her, truly, complexly and selflessly.

Hermione felt the decision before she even consciously made it. She knew what she was going to do. It was the only thing that she could do. She looked down at Draco and touched his lips gently with the tip of her finger.

Draco looked up at her with his beautiful eyes.

"It's time I do something to deserve a love like yours," Hermione said and then she stood.

"What are you doing?" asked Draco his voice filling with worry.

Hermione smiled, a true and gentle smile. The kind that you give when you know you are doing what must be done. The kind when you want to do what is right and you know what that is without any shadow of a doubt.

She turned towards the black.

"Stay away from the dark!" Draco half yelled as the leech came to take him Hermione stood in its path.

The stench that reeked off of it made Hermione's stomach turn and yet she stood firm.

"I won't let it have you," said Hermione without turning back to Draco. She looked into the blackness and the cold of it made her shiver. It was the same evil she had seen in Voldemort's eyes, a dark beyond black.

She took a deep breath and squared off in front of the giant leach.

"Hermione, NO!" pleaded Draco. "No!"

His voice tore at her heart. She wanted to turn back to him and hold him forever until there was no dark left anywhere in the world that could touch them. Instead, Hermione closed her eyes and felt a sense of peace wash over her.

"Thank you for your love Draco," she daring a glance back over her shoulder. Their eyes met. "It is the greatest gift I have ever been given.

Before Draco could respond Hermione turned and leaped into the blackness wrapping her arms around the great leach. Pain scorched and burned her skin at every point of contact, she held on and pulled herself back out of Draco's mind taking the dark with her.

* * *

Great shouts and a blast that made the floor rumbled had Snape leaving his place of watch by the bed and rushing to the door. Casting a glance back to check on the frozen scene he opened the door just a crack. Spells hurtled through the air back and forth between the few snatchers, who had been lingering around since Greyback's disappearance several hours ago, and several members of the order.

 _Not now,_ thought Snape. The timing could not be worse. The last thing that Severus Snape wanted to do was ruin Draco's goodbye, or deprive Narcissa from being there for the last few moments with her son. Based on the sounds of battle, both of those things were going to happen regardless of his desires.

A strange moaning sound from behind him, caught Snape's ear and he and turned in time to see Draco's body bow up off the bed. The blond boy's mouth opened in a strange wrenching sound which almost sounded like a 'No' and a stream of the black spewed forth from his lips. The writhing liquid arched up into the air, snapping and hissing before it shot downwards and wrapped around Hermione opening her mouth and pushing itself violently forward. She made a disturbed sound of pain and her body dropped backwards onto the bed and began convulsing. Snape watched in horror as the black veins that had been on Draco's skin faded out and began to spread across Hermione.

The door blew open and Snape stumbled backward caught of guard.

He turned in time to parry the first attack and rid the intruder of his wand.

 _You can not stay,_ he told himself.

 _You need to help_ them, he thought.

 _There is nothing you can do._

Another Wizard came through and Snape sent him flying right back out of the room.

He glanced at the bed. Draco was still laying as still as the grave and Hermione was still seizing.

What happened?

Had Hermione pulled the curse from Draco?

Or maybe it was finished with Draco and then crossed across the bind to finish with her.

Snape didn't have time to find out which was which. There were more members of the order coming.

He needed to save the person who he knew could be saved.

He grabbed Narcissa and she woke with a start.

"What's going on?" she demanded as she came to.

"We are under siege," said Snape pulling her away from Draco and Hermione with one hand and deflecting a curse with the other.

"I'm not leaving my boy," said Narcissa wrenching away. A spell came wizzing by her head and Narcissa took out her wand and send the wizard crashing into the ceiling and the floor and back again like a broken doll/

"You must," insisted Snape. "His time has come."

"I will not leave him while he still draws breath!" she yelled.

Two more members of the order entered the room. Snape and Narcissa began parrying and defending. It quickly became oblivious to Snape that Narcissa had spent all of her power trying to save her sons life. He had always considered Narcissa to be a formidable witch both in and out of battle. At the moment, however, she was struggling to keep even the most basic of deffences up.

Another attack hit her sending her flying over the chaise. He saw her eyes roll and she slumped unconscious.

She was several feet away from him and he tried to figure out how to get to Narcissa and get out.

Snape parried another several and glanced at the bed. Hermione had collapsed, her motions and shivers had grown smaller while Draco remained perfectly still.

 _Its killing her..._

 _Do something Severus,_ he told himself and lunged to the side dodging an attack and grabbing hold of Narcissa from where she lay.

He gave one last glance at the bed. He didn't want to leave them. He wanted to help Hermione, and check on Draco. He knew that to do either would likely mean the end for both himself and Narcissa.

 _You can't save them all..._

Snape closed his eyes, leapt to the side and dissaperated with Narcissa in his arms.

* * *

"NO!" Yelled Draco as he shot awake.

 _She can't do this, she can't take the curse. it will kill her._

Coughing he sat up in bed, limbs creaking with the effort. His eyes sought out Hermione. She was convulsing madly. Her head thrashing from side to side as the black veins he recognized from his own body began to creep through her skin at a frightening pace. Even without looking around the room Draco assesed what was happening. The smell of fire and dust and the crackle of magic was in the air. There had been a battle. His mother was gone. He didn't have time think about it. All he cared about in that moment was Hermione laying there spazeming.

"Don't do this," said Draco. "Don't leave me."

 _Please don't leave me Hermione._

 _This isn't the way its supposed to be. Its supposed to be me._

"Stay away from her," someone ordered.

Draco ignored them. He didn't even look up to see who was speaking. He didn't care.

He reached out for Hermione grabbing hold of her thrashing head.

"Please," he begged, tears threatening his vision. _Please._

He had been ready to die. He had been ready for anything except a world without her.

"What have you done to her?" another voice commanded.

Black dripped from the side of Hermione's mouth.

"No, you can't do this. Hermione please no," he begged leaning over her body. "Don't you dare die on me!" he commanded.

Her back bowed and she shook in his hands and then went completely limp.

"NO!" Draco half screamed.

A curse hit Draco knocking him off the bed. His head slammed violently into the floor.

* * *

Lucius lay on the ground looking up at the ceiling.

His blood seeping out into the burgundy carpeting. The colour was so close to matching that it almost seemed like water spilling outwards.

He choked and gurgled on the blood.

He didn't understand how this could have happened to him.

It wasn't supposed to end this way for him.

He was supposed to die old and rich decades from now...

He coughed and found he couldn't draw breath.

His lungs had filled with his own blood.

Panic clawed at his insides and he struggled to breath.

Fear consumed, as death came for Lucius Malfoy.

* * *

Draco's world was black. There was nothing, no light no sound and still he searched for her in the dark.

He reached out, with fingers that had no substance, and combed through the nothing searching for her.

Every flicker of almost light, made him turn to seek her.

Every almost sound had his straining to hear her.

He did not stop looking, even though he could not feel her there.

He did not stop searching, even though he could not see her there.

She had to be somewhere and wherever that place was Draco wanted to be.

He couldn't be without her.

She couldn't be gone.

It wasn't allowed.

It wasn't meant to be that way.

He was supposed to die for her, not the other way around.

He was the one who was in love.

He needed her.

He loved Her.

In the Darkness, without a voice, he called out her name.

His heart called out.

His mind called out.

His soul called out.

For her.

* * *

Hermione floated in the warmth and the dark.

She felt safe and warm and like everything was going to be okay.

She recognized this feeling from when she had been in Draco's head.

This was what dying was like.

So where was the light?

The warmth of the dark was soothing.

And then something in the darkness moved and Hermione shuddered.

There was something chilling and cold near her.

She could feel it, coming closer and closer and had the deep desire to run.

There was something...something evil coming for her.

Something darker than dark.

Something blacker than black.

Something that sent a chill down her spine.

She tried to move away, to run from the feeling of the cold.

She wanted to get back to the safety of the warmth.

She felt something wrap round her ankles holding her tightly in place.

She moved to reach down to free herself and realized that she couldn't.

Her hands were held out wards so that she felt like she was tied spread-eagle in the dark.

Fear took over and Hermione thrashed trying to get away.

The cold, damp, chilling tentacled holding her in place began to grow and climb up her body.

Her terror grew with each inch the slimy, wet tentacles progressed across her skin.

The tentacles went higher touching and binding to ever inch of her flesh. Pushing and creeping across her.

Hermione opened her mouth to scream and a section of the dark wormed its way in past her lips. She tried to bite down and shove it out with her tongue but the dark grew prying open her mouth and pushing its way down her throat.

Hermione choked, gagging on the sour taste.

It began to curl around her, constricting.

She screamed inside as the darkness strangled her.

* * *

.

* * *

..

* * *

...

* * *

..

* * *

" **Darkness**

cannot drive out **darkness** :

only **light** can do that.

 **Hate** cannot drive out **hate** :

only **love** can do that."

-Martin Luther King Jr.

* * *

..

* * *

...

* * *

..

* * *

.

* * *

Draco woke slowly. His head was pounding and his eyes were blurry. He blinked and tried to stand, hissing in pain as the ropes around him constricted magically. His hands were tied behind his back and to the chair he was on, while each of his ankles were tied to the chairs legs. He swung his head around wildly.

Where was Hermione?

Where was he?

The floor was a mix of dirt and crass and the walls and ceiling were striped red and yellow fabric. He was in a tent.

A tent of someone who liked to fly the Gyrphondor colours.

It didn't take a genius to figure out that he was currently a captive of the order.

But where was Hermione?

Draco blinked hard several times, trying to clear his vision

A tent flap moved to the side and a blurry figured stepped in.

"Finally you're awake," came a growl from the voice he recognized as Ronald Weasely.

"Where is she?" demanded Draco and he tried to look up at Ron's face to see him clearly. Through the haze he saw something cross Ron's face. He couldn't quite tell what.

Ron hit Draco with a solid punch across the face.

The blow startled Draco and snapped his head to the side. He felt a tooth come loose and spat out blood. He felt his eyes roll with an effort to remain conscious.

"I'll be asking the questions," growled Ron. "Like why the hell aren't you dead?"

Draco shook his head trying to clear it.

He needed to stay awake.

He needed to stay focused and figure out where Hermione was.

Why hadn't Ron just answered his Question?

Where was she?

Why wasn't she here with them?

A cold dread began to root at the base of Draco's neck.

Why wasn't she here with them?

"WHY AREN'T YOU DEAD?" Ron Demanded again, this time slapping him.

The slap hurt less and stung more.

"You're curse worked fine," gasped Draco seeing stars. "I should be dead."

 _But I'm not because..._

 _Because she took the dark._

Draco trembled and his hairs rose from the middle of his back straight up to the base of his scull before sending a prickly sensation through his hair.

She had taken the dark.

She had gone so still...

Where was she?

Ron hit him again, this time the blow landed hard in Draco's stomach.

Draco coughed and groaned from the impact. His stomach heaved and he dry-heaved.

"I'm not a bloody idiot," said Ron. "if it had really worked you wouldn't be here now."

"Well the idiot part is worth debating," sneered Draco, unable to resist.

Ron hit him again in the stomach. This time Draco did vomit. He had nothing on his stomach so bile was all that came up. He looked down at it and the fact that it wasn't black scared him. She had taken it all. She had taken the curse and all of the dark form him. There was nothing left inside him which meant it was all in her...

He had almost died...

What if she had...

No, Draco couldn't bear to think about it.

She had to be alive.

She had to.

The tent flap moved aside again and Harry stepped in. The Potter boy looked like he had aged five years in past weeks since Draco had seen him. His hair was disheveled and his face was harder.

"Ron, what are you doing?" asked Harry frowning as he looked over at Draco.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" shot Ron angrily.

"He's loosening my teeth," said Draco snarkily.

It wasn't smart, in fact it was kind of stupid of him to provoke the people holding him hostage, but Draco refused to cower. Cowering and begging and sniveling...those were things the old Draco would have done.

They were not things that Draco would do now.

The Draco Hermione had made stronger...kinder and ...more...would not quiver with fear of pain or violence. He had already been through the dark. He had found Hermione as his light. There was nothing these two could do to him that was worse than the curse Ron had already cast, or the pain that that he had endured under Voldemort's wand after protecting Hermione in the woods.

The only thing that could make him beg now was Hermione.

He would get down on his knees for her, if it meant saving her.

He wasn't afraid of these two anymore. He had looked death in the face. The only thing that Draco was afraid of was whether or not he would see Hermione again.

He needed to know where she was.

He needed to see her, to be with her, to know she was okay... and Ron wasn't telling him.

Ron hit him across the face and this time the molar that had come loose with the first punch broke free. Draco spat it out on to the ground as blood filled his mouth.

He glared up at Ron unflinching.

Daring him with his eyes to do it again.

Ron raised his arm again and Harry grabbed hold stopping him.

Draco blinked in surprise at Harry's actions. Harry paid him not attention though, the dark haired boy was entirely focused on his friend.

"This isn't helpful," said Harry,, clearly concerned with his friend's level of violence rather than Draco's well-being.

"I don't give a fuck," said Ron. "After what he did to Hermione..."

"Where is she?" asked Draco again "Is she alright?"

"No," answered Harry.

Draco felt everything in him seize with the dread which had began to take hold as soon as he had opened his eyes here and realized that she wasn't with him.

"I need to see her," Draco begged. "Please."

Ron hit him again.

Harry didn't even try to stop him this time.

Draco felt his nose crunch as Ron broke it to the side.

Draco didn't care.

He could barely feel it.

He was numb with worry. He wanted to be sick with it.

All he cared about was Hermione.

He wanted to see her.

He needed to see her.

He needed her to be alright.

Nothing else mattered.

"You can blame yourself," said Ron. "For the fact that you'll never see her again."

It couldn't be.

She couldn't be...

He didn't want to live in a world without her.

"No!" Draco yelled.

His heart tore in two, breaking inside his chest.

Ron hit him again and this time Draco welcomed the pain.

He let out a wail that sounded like a dying animal.

Ron hit him again.

"Stop it Ron," Draco heard Harry's voice yell over his own woeful noise.

Another blow landed and Draco's world went silent.

* * *

 **THIS IS NOT THE END. THIS STORY IS** **NOT** **OVER. (unless you feel like having a tragic end in which case you can technically stop here but its not where I am intending to end the story, So please stick with me.)**

 **Also that is one of my favorite quotes of all time and I felt it was perfect for this sequence of the story. I truly do believe that love is the greatest thing. It is the only thing that can overcome hate and darkness and evil. Not just in stories but in real life. So I would encourage you lovely people to go out and spread love not hate in everything you do.**

 **This story is not just a love story, it is a story about someone who came from a household of hate and judgement and prejudice. It is a story about someone learning to see the good in the world and learning to be a better person-the kind of person doesn't judge not on the breeding, or colour or differences of class, but on the content of a persons character. I think the whole world would be better if we all learned that lesson don't you?**

 **I believe that words and actions can change the world. And true...yes I am just this little person behind a keyboard. I have nothing special to offer except my words. I hope that my words are good and can do some good. Thank you for reading my words. (And now I hope you forgive me as I step down from my little soap box.)**

 **If you have the time, please review.**


	42. Chapter 40: The Felix Felicis

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed:** alluringmango, Aid4, Horses8, .babe, mmiller0000, Bloodred 321, addictedtoloveandfiction, ChildofBrisingr, mega700201, ElizColl,Qween87, tayann93, inkwolf199, AnayaR , apls79, chapou69, tomfeltonswifey, jacpin2002 , RotcehM , LovEToReadit, lady alegria, cbacon1972, minghella, LillsBills , Kotodashi Kyoshi, IanAlphaAxel, Ayr **and the guests** "Who", "D", "Guest Reader", "Sila" **and** "Guest"

 ****Authors note: Hello dear readers. I just wanted to Address **** **FRED**** **and your reviews mentioning him. Yes, it would be horrible if he wasn't sticking up for Draco in all this...but here is the thing...the timeline is a little closer than you might think…and it's my bad for not making it more clear. (Something I will have to fix/do a better job of in the future.) Thank you all for your feedback so I now know and can improve. You are helping make me a better writer so thank you for your reviews, I promise to be more careful with this and the coming chapters (The number of people asking where Fred was let me know I dropped the ball.) Without your reviews I would be in the dark so there you go: proof just how important you guys are. THANK YOU.**

* * *

 ****IMPORTANT- PLEASE READ- TIMELINE**** (for the past several chapters)

 **-8:00PM** Fred left the manor

 **-8:30**. Draco collapsed

 **-9:00** Snape arrived and talked with Narcissa

 **-11:30** Narcissa tried to resort to removing the mark.

 **-12:00 (midnight)** Voldemort told Narcissa he wouldn't remove the dark mark (because he's an asshole and didn't bother to rush over and it took Narcissa trying to remove the mark herself to get his attention)

 **-3:00** in the morning ("Several hours later") Narcissa used the Phoenix tears. She then collapsed and slept for a few hours of sleep

 **-6:00** Hermione came in to visit Draco after killing Greyback

 **-6:15** Hermione was only in Draco's head for about 15 minutes (as mentioned...time is different in his head-thoughts move faster than words through our minds and we can relive a memory quicker than it took to happen-also I didn't picture Snape being okay with her being in Draco's head forever.)

 **-6:20** The order came into Draco's room.

 **-8:00** in the morning is when Draco woke back up and Ron told him he will never see Hermione again.

 **So Fred has been gone less than 12 hours...and has no idea what is going on...**

* * *

Chapter 40: The Felix Felicis.

 **12 hours ago (8:00 Pm)**

Fred jumped out the window and landed like a cat.

 _That was fun,_ he thought to himself and smiled wiping his hands together to knock off the dirt. He ran out into the yard like it was no one's business and enjoyed a nice sprint to the tree line. His legs felt really good and at the same time they acted like he hadn't used them in weeks. The muscle burn was surprisingly pleasant. He couldn't bring himself to turn and wave goodbye to Hermione even though a part of him wanted him too.

 _You're doing this for her_ , he reminded himself, _and for Malfoy._

Fred shook his head inwardly. Who would have imagined he would ever be trying to rescue Draco Malfoy?

No one, but then again, no one would have bet on Draco turning into a decent human being.

Fred began navigating the woods as quickly as he could without breaking an ankle.

The crunch of the underbrush felt deafeningly loud in his ears.

 _You're being about as quiet as an elephant on bubble wrap_ , Fred told himself, wishing that he had a wand to silence his movements at least a little.

 _Someone is going to see you and hear you and come kill you_ , the little voice inside his head said gruffly.

 _We'll be fine_ , he told it back.

It was just shortly after eight and the sun was setting painting the sky pretty shades of pink.

 _If I weren't running for my life I think I would enjoy watching that,_ mused Fred as he pushed through the trees. He wanted to at least get close to that cliff that Draco had mentioned before it went fully dark.

 _Malfoy said you would have about 24 hours with the Felix, best not use it on sleep,_ he told himself. He might have a cat nap sometime tomorrow, but he knew he needed to keep moving for now. Friday was only four days away and he needed to make sure he got to his family and the order with enough time for them to plan out the rescue.

 _You have to keep going and make it out of here. For yourself, your family, and them..._

Fred trudged on through the twilight and made it to the cliff almost an hour later just as the light vanished from the sky. His eyes adjusted slowly to the dark. All at once Fred's foot slipped and he tripped over a rogue stone and fell backwards just in time to see the light from wands of Death eaters patrolling coming out towards the cliff where he had been standing before he started his free-fall.

Fred tumbled head over heels down the side of the cliff and landed with near silent thump on a decidedly thick and luscious patch of moss.

Fred blinked up at the stars stunned and frozen. He looked up at the side of the cliff and realized that he had just dropped a good forty feet and was still alive.

 _What the hell just happened?_ He blinked up at the sky.

"I thought I saw something over here," came a gruff voice.

"Lucius said it was likely just a hiker wandered into the edge of their property-bumped the ward felt uncomfy and left," answered a second voice.

"Uncomfy? Really? That's your word choice," said the first voice incredulously.

"Sod-off," said the second.

"Well it looks like whoever was here isn't anymore and no one was in the grounds so it's fine then."

"Yeah, lets get back."

"You wanna have a puff first. I've gone some good magical stuff we can smoke before we head back?"

"Well that sounds like the first smart thing you've said all evening."

"Do you want me to share or not?"

"I was only joking, give me some."

There was a rustling and Fred smelled something sweet waft through the air. He didn't dare move lest they hear him and come down. Without his wand he was practically defenseless against two death eaters.

"Awful shame the fact that the Malfoy boy doesn't share the girl," said the gruff one.

Fred felt his cheeks redden with anger.

"I dunno," said the other. "I don't have much interest in Mudbloods."

"But she's a fine looking little one though," said the first.

"Yeah, all the same. I don't want any of it to wear off on me."

"Her blood don't wear off on you just because you stick your prick in," said the first and Fred heard a smack.

"Keep you're hands off alright!"

"Alright, alright," said the first one defensively.

"I hear the boy's sick though," said the second a moment later.

"If he dies you think we'll get to have a go with her before they kill her?"

"You'll have to get in line," the second responded with a snort. "You know Greyback's got first dibs on her. He's still pissed that she wasn't given as his present for finding them."

"I heard Lucius paid him off for her."

"Its an insult."

"Its gold."

"Yeah and it's an insult to Greyback. He wanted the girl more than he wanted the gold but he knew he couldn't get her while the boy was around."

"Do you think he's the reason why the kids sick then?"

"I dunno," answered the deatheater and there was a pause. "I wouldn't put it past him," he snorted. "Dangerous game though. If Bellatrix found out she'd skin him alive."

The Death eaters laughed.

"We best be getting back before they wonder," said the one several moments later

"Alright."

Fred heard their footsteps move away and let out a sigh of relief.

After waiting a few moments to make sure they weren't coming back around Fred pulled himself up, dusted himself off and continued by the dim light of the waxing moon.

A few hours and several miles later Fred had to stop to rest. It was the first time that he had really been up and moving about and while adrenaline had kept him going for the first several hours of walking, he was now exhausted.

 _I just need a few moments rest,_ he told himself and sat down.

He closed his eyes and when they opened again the moon had moved several degrees across the sky in the sky.

 _Dammit Fred,_ he chastised himself. _You wasted precious hours of the Felix._

How long had he slept? Two hours? Three? It had to be at least one in the morning. Fred shook his head and stretched. His muscles complained.

 _You need to keep moving,_ he told himself.

 _You should eat something first_ , he thought, keep up your strength. He ate a little of the food he was carrying in the small bag on his back and then continued walking.

 _The moon is so nice and bright tonight,_ he thought to himself, _that's lucky…at least I can sort of see where I'm going._

 _I don't think the Felix Felicis is controlling the moon there Fred,_ came a voice in his head that sounded a lot like his brothers voice.

Fred smiled as the thought of George kept him company. He was looking forward to seeing them all again. Hugging his mother…. She would cry, but it would be the good kind of crying-the joyful kind, but most of all he was looking forward to seeing George. Fred could only imagine what it had been like for his other half thinking that he was dead. The thought of losing George had Fred's inside's all twisted.

He made it what he presumed was several more miles, using the moon and the stars as his compass to keep moving in the same direction.

He finally had to sit down on a nice large log to rest.

 _It's actually quite a nice night out,_ thought Fred absently looking at the moon and his surroundings. He leaned back to stretch and the log beneath him shifted and Fred found himself tumbling down a rather significant hillside. He rolled to a stop at the bottom and smacked his head against something hard enough to knock him out cold.

* * *

When Fred came to the sky had shifted once more and if he wasn't mistaken it was getting a little lighter.

 _Dammit._

Fred shook the leaves and debris from his hair.

"Are you sure you didn't bomb that Felix somehow Draco," said Fred looking up at the sky with a snort.

True he had made it safely out of the Malfoy property, and true he had fallen down forty feet without dying or breaking anything, or getting caught by the death eaters that had been looking for him, but Fred could not imagine how falling down the side of a ravine and getting knocked out could possibly constitute good luck.

 _Maybe he just make a weaker drought and your luck has already run out_ , thought Fred.

 _Well in that case, it's good that it at least lasted long enough for you to get away._

Fred put his hand down to push himself up and his hand came in contact with something cool and metal.

"What's that?" he wondered aloud, his voice seeming loud in the silence of the woods.

Under the shelter of the trees little light was coming through and so he felt around blindly. The second Fred's hand took hold of the bucket that was sitting beside him he vanished.

* * *

Voldemort was lying in bed with Bellatrix draped across his side when he felt the death of the first Deatheater, thanks to the connection he had to each one of them, through the Dark Mark. He didn't think much of it. Perhaps there had been a fight or a disagreement. He wondered absently who it was and then shrugged away the thought resolving to check later. It was after all the early hours of the morning and he had been at the manor rather late. It had been Bellatrix idea to get away, just the two of them, for a little while and Voldemort had taken her up on the offer. Bellatrix was his most loyal and faithful of servants. Her loyalty was matched only by Severus Snape...however her fervor and adoration was unparalleled. He was sure there was nothing that she wouldn't do for him. It almost made him nauseous to think of her affection, but what she could do for him in the bedroom because of it made up for the slight disdain he felt at how puppy-like she often became around him. Knowing he could sick her on his enemies like a pit-bull made up for it.

When the second death tingled along his arm he sat up in bed. One death could be an accident. Two meant something was going on.

"What is wrong my Lord?" asked Bellatrix sitting up beside him and cuddling into his shoulder

"Something has happened," said Voldemort shrugging off her attention. He stood and was dressed in a flash of black and magic. He had been tired the last few days and part of it was the curse that the Weasely boy had put on Draco Malfoy. The curse fed off the dark mark and the dark mark was a piece of Voldemort's magic.

Well we won't have to worry about that for long, thought Voldemort. He could feel mark fading and knew that Draco would soon be dead.

Bellatrix scrambled out of bed dressing in a flash and coming over to his side.

"What is it?" she asked. "Is it the Potter boy?"

"No," said Voldemort.

"What then?" she asked. Her nattering was getting on his nerves. She was like a little bug buzzing around his head.

"Silence woman!" said Voldemort backhanding her away.

Bellatrix whimpered and her bottom lip trembled, not upset at having been hit, only at disappointing her Lord.

Voldemort looked down at her and saw the sadness in her expression.

Do not kick the dog hard or it will bite, he thought. Though he had no real worry of that from Bellatrix. She would never turn on him. Of that he was sure. Even if she did, she would be no match for him, especially since he had the elder wand.

 _But the wand isn't as strong as everyone has said..._

 _Or perhaps it is just resisting you..._

 _But why?_

Voldemort shook his head and directed his attention back to Bellatrix.

"Hush now," he said gently and stroked her face where he had hit her. He could see the red mark against her pale skin.

"I'm sorry, my lord," she said. "I didn't mean to pester you."

"Your concern is noted my dear," he said and then turned. "And I forgive you."

"Thank you my lord," she said in a breath of relief.

"Come Bellatrix, we are going back to your sister's home."

* * *

"Bloody hell!" exclaimed Fred and turned over to the side and vomited.

"What the hell is a bloody portkey doing in the middle of nowhere outside the Draco's estate?" He spat, trying clean out his mouth and drank the last of the water he had brought with him.

Normally traveling by portkey did not make Fred Weasely sick. It wasn't the most pleasant thing in the world but he had gotten used to it over the years thanks to many, many uses in the past. This time however, he had been utterly unprepared to go whizzing through space in a nauseating swirl and the result could be seen on the grass next to him.

Fred blinked, looking around and trying to determine where in the world exactly the portkey had dropped him…and then his eyes caught sight of a familiar tower, illuminated with the first rays of morning light as the sun threatened to peak out over the surrounding hills.

"No bloody way," a smile tugged at the corner of Fred's mouth.

He was just outside of Hogwarts.

He took a moment to process and pinched himself just to make sure that he was, indeed, awake. The smile wouldn't leave his face even though he tried to hide it.

Hogwarts.

Years ago, portkeys were what had been used to transport people to Hogwarts. However people in general didn't like portkeys and so they had all eventually been replaced when the Hogwarts express was first installed.

 _I thought they got rid of all of them,_ he thought blinking.

 _Well clearly not,_ his mind answered back in a tone that George often used. Fred smiled thinking of his brother.

Now **this** was lucky.

 _Not really,_ another side of his mind protested, _its being run by Severus Snape and a bunch of deatheaters, so you're kind of screwed._

 _Have a little faith_ , he heard a brotherly tone ring in his ears and Fred smiled.

"You can do this," he told himself quietly.

Now that he was at Hogwarts all he had to do was go find Ginny, borrow her wand and get himself back home. Then everything would be hunky-dory. He could warn the rest of the gang, organize the rescue and have time to relax for tea in the meantime.

 _Pity Draco said four days, I'll be home much faster now, even with falling down a hill and getting knocked out that Portkey's put me ahead of schedule._

Fred stretched, dusting himself off with one hand and walked towards the castle.

He found his feet walking straight towards the main entrance.

 _What the hell do you think you're doing? He asked himself, you're going to get yourself caught for sure._

It felt like such a good idea though he found himself walking confidently through the front gates of Hogwarts.

The Deatheater at the front was making out in the corner and gave him one glance and waved him on by.

 _Wow,_ Fred shook his head and walked in the door and smacked straight into Luna Lovegood.

"Well hello Geo..." Luna paused. "You're not George."

"Hello Luna, what are you doing up so early?"

"I always like going for walks in the morning. The sunrise is very lovely and while everyone here has a problem with students up out of bed late at night, no one seems to really much care if you're awake early in the morning."

"Oh, right."

"I take it you didn't die then," said Luna in her airy way.

"No," Fred shook his head.

"I like the eye patch," she said smiling. "Very fetching."

"Thanks, listen-"

"You really shouldn't be out here," Luna interrupted and held out her hand. "I'll take you to the room of requirement. It's where the students who are against you-know-who all stay."

"I need to see my sister."

"She'll be there I'm sure," said Luna smiling. "I'm happy you're alive Fred and I am sure she'll be thrilled. It will be nice to see her face."

Fred took Luna's hand and then let out a hiss of pain yanking it back.

"What happened?" asked Luna.

"I kind of fell down a hill," said Fred ."And a cliff," he added. "I didn't realize I cut my hand till just now."

"I've got some salve up in my dorm," said Luna. "We can stop there if you like first."

"Yes," said Fred. Going up to Ravenclaw tower felt like a really good idea for some reason.

 _It's probably just that you want to get out of view_ , he told himself.

They made their way through the halls, keeping to the shadows. Neville passed them looking bleary eyed and a little worn. He had clearly just woken up. Fred noticed that the younger boy was so busy looking at Luna he almost didn't notice Fred. When Neville did finally see Fred his footsteps faltered.

"Geez," said Neville. "Luna...what's going on?" he asked in harsh whisper.

"We're going to go get Fred's hand fixed up," answered Luna as if there was nothing extraordinary about walking down the hall with a former student who was supposed to be dead.

Neville blinked.

"You should find Ginny," said Luna. "Tell her I need to see her and to meet me in the room of requirement."

"Okay," said Neville. "It is you right?" he asked looking at Fred. "You are Fred right?"

"Since the day I was born," answered Fred. "At least I think so. Sometimes they had trouble telling us apart even back then so for all I know I could have been George the day I was born."

"Right," Neville nodded, clearly still a little groggy. "Okay."

"Oh Neville," said Luna.

"Yes."

"Don't tell her yet if you please. I would very much like to see her face. I know it's a little selfish of me, but it's not every day you get to see someone back from the dead."

Neville smiled at Luna.

 _That boy has it bad,_ thought Fred.

"Okay," he answered and Fred smiled inwardly. He was pretty sure that the little blond could ask Neville for the moon and the boy would try and find a way to get it for her.

"Thank you," Luna said sweetly and pulled Fred away.

Luna led Fred west to the Ravenclaw tower.. She held the cuff of his shirt gently as she walked him up the tight spiral staircase. Fred would have almost felt claustrophobic if it weren't for how calm and steady Luna seemed.

 _She's climbed theses stairs every day since she got sorted into Ravenclaw_ , he told himself, _of course it's nothing to her._

After what seemed like forever they reached what Fred could only assume was the door to the tower. Unlike the common room he had grown up with this door had no portrait in front of it to ask for the password; there was only a plain expanse of aged wood and a bronze knocker in the shape of an eagle.

"What's the password?" asked Fred.

"No password," said Luna. "You just have to answer a question."

As if on cue the eagle opened its mouth and spoke in a musical voice.

"What grows in winter, dies in summer and grows with its roots up?"

"I thought it would be something academic" said Fred.

"It often is," answered Luna. "But it's important to keep all areas of your mind active, which means it's often riddles. It's a good way to make you think and keep your mind sharp. Its one thing to memorize spells for a test and another to think outside the box. I like it" Luna frowned. "Usually that is…I'm not sure the answer this time, which is unfortunate because I don't want anyone else coming to find you out in the open." She closed her eyes. "Just give me a moment to think about it."

Luna's face furrowed into a look of concentration and a little line appeared between her two dainty eyebrows.

 _Shit, shit, shit!_

 _What the hell kind of common room has a riddle instead of a password?_

"Does it change each time?" asked Fred.

"Yes," answered Luna.

"But what if need to run back and grab a book for class and get stumped?" asked Fred exasperated.

"Then you have to wait for someone else to show up and answer it or figure it out for yourself," said Luna. "It's actually quite a nice way to make friends when you start," she patted Fred gently. "Now if you don't mind I need to focus on the riddle," said Luna closing her eyes.

Fred fought a sense of panic and then a voice echoed in his head and he remembered his mother's words:

 _"Use that brain of yours if you're so clever be smart too!"_

Fred paused and took a deep breath.

He turned the riddle over in his head.

And then his eyes popped open and he smiled.

* * *

Voldemort walked through the manor slowly. He took in the carnage.

This battle had gone decidedly differently from the last.

Instead of members of the order laying on the ground. There were snatchers laying dead.

The order had attacked just before sunrise and the manor was silent as a grave. The elegant stone walls had become a mausoleum for the dead. He saw one member of the order laying gasping for breath and smiled.

"Nagini," he said her name and stroked the top of his companion's head. "Eat," he ordered and the great snake slithered forward and attacked the dying wizard with a loud crunch. Voldemort reveled in the screams as they slowly died. He closed his eyes for a moment and just listened, the sound calming him.

"Cissy!" Bellatrix began to yell and search the house, her voice cut through Voldmort's calm and he sneered.

Voldemort wandered slowly as Bellatrix frantically searched the house.

It wouldn't be so bad if they were all dead. Lucius had become practically useless. Narcissa was going to be beside herself with her son's death, and her attitude...well she needed to be put into place for having spoken to him like could she not understand that it was an honor to die with his mark upon your arm?

The Dark Lord shook his head and continued to walk.

Bellatrix wouldn't like it if he made an example of Narcissa, but he could not allow for weakness. He needed them all to fear him and know his strength. It was the only way that he was going to win this war and create a new world order for his people. He would be their savoir, and ruler. He would be their immortal king.

All he had to do was kill Harry Potter.

Yes, if the Malfoy's were gone he could give their holdings to Bellatrix as a reward for her loyalty. Everyone else would see what being a faithful servant could get you. Rewards, position...his favor. He closed his eyes once more relishing an image of himself on a throne surrounded by his most loyal death eaters. They would rule the world. They would be his eyes and ears everywhere, stamping out any and all decent.

There was a shriek from the direction of Lucius study.

Voldemort stepped over the bodies to walk to her.

When Bellatrix came out of the room she was even more pale than usual. Voldemort guessed the reason before she even opened her mouth.

"Lucius is dead my lord," she said confirming what he already knew.

Voldemort walked slowly past her into the study. He took his time circling the room.

Lucius Malfoy lay frozen ridged on the carpet. One hand was clutching at the hole in his chest and the other was frozen extended upward reaching out as if to fend off some unseen creature, fingers frozen with the beginnings of rigor mortis. There was a darkness to the carpet all around him and Voldemort inhaled the sweet metallic scent of blood.

"Pity," said Voldemort loud enough for Bellatrix to hear, even though he didn't mean it in the least. He circled his demised servant once more wondering at how exactly he had met his end.

"And have you found your sister?" he asked looking up at Bellatrix.

"No my Lord," she answered with a slight bow.

"Look for her," ordered Voldemort. Bellatrix hurried to obey and he took a seat in Lucius reading chair to enjoy the view as Bellatrix went on the hunt for her sibling.

* * *

"HOW COULD YOU!" screamed Narcissa pounding on Snape's chest with her fists. She had just woken to find herself in one of her families cottages instead of by her son's deathbed. Her heart hammered in her chest. She wanted to claw Severus' eyes out. "You took me away from him!"

"I had to," said Snape letting her blows fall and doing nothing to stop them, only keeping his face just out of reach. "You could have been killed."

"I missed his last moment!" Narcissa wailed. "I will never get those back Severus. Never."

The truth of her own words slammed into Narcissa and she collapsed onto the floor.

"My son, my baby."

Snape wanted to turn away from the display of emotion. The Narcissa he knew was perfectly poised at almost every turn. The woman in front of him was a wreck.

 _She loved him._

 _He might still be alive_ , thought Snape and hesitated. Should he tell her? Would it do more harm than good?

If the curse had left Draco and moved to Hermione there was a chance that her boy was still alive. However, what Snape had seen could have simply been the curse finishing with Draco and using the bind to continue to feed and jump to Hermione. If that were the case he would be getting Narcissa's hopes up for nothing. It was too cruel.

 _Sad that the girl had to die too…_

The thought flitted thought Snape's mind. He shook his head and turned to Narcissa. No, he best not tell her…Not till he knew for sure what he had actually seen.

It had been well over an hour since the attack and Snape knew they had to go back at some point. Morning sunshine was just beginning to rise over the horizon. Students would be getting up at Hogwarts…he would need to return to his duties there soon.

 _First deal with this,_ he told himself.

 _One thing at a time._

"We should go back to the manor," said Snape. "There is a chance," he said quietly "That the order will be waiting for us there in a trap"

"I don't care," said Narcissa and Snape believed her.

"You should," He said. "Do you think your son would want you dying because you chose to act recklessly?"

The slap hit Snape hard across the side of the face hard enough that he felt tears bloom from the sting. He was so shocked from the blow that he barely moved.

"Don't ever speak of my son and what he would want again Severus," hissed Narcissa darkly. "He's gone and I have no chains to hold me and nothing to lose."

She Vanished in a swirl of dark clothing as she apperated.

Snape felt cold.

A person with nothing to lose was dangerous.

Snape followed quickly after.

* * *

Narcissa apperated to the house and came face to face with the raised wand of her sister Bellatrix. She held her own out in front of her instinctively.

Had things changed? Were they now enemies? If not now it would come soon. Narcissa could not abide the Dark Lord any longer.

"Cissy!" Bellatrix exclaimed and wrapped her arms around Narcissa for the briefest of moments. "You're alive."

Narcissa felt a rush of relief at not having to fight her sister for the moment. The feeling was short lived.

"I am," said Narcissa darkly. "Where is my boy?"

"Gone," said Bellatrix.

Narcissa closed her eyes and took a deep steadying breath.

 _You knew this was coming before you stepped foot back in your house,_ she told herself.

"Show me his body," said Narcissa, resigned to the fact that her son was dead even though inside her chest it felt like it couldn't possibly be true.

"I can't," said Bellatrix.

"And why not?" Snapped Narcissa.

"Because he isn't there," said Snape coming around the corner. "I have just been to his room and it seems that both his body and that of Ms. Granger are missing."

"Missing?" asked Narcissa. She reeled. That made no sense. The Granger girl being gone, that was fine...but why Draco?

"Yes," answered Snape.

"Why?" demanded Narcissa.

"Cissy, Its okay," Bellatrix tried to comfort her, she stretched her arms outwards as if to embrace her sister. Narcissa side stepped.

"It most certainly is NOT okay," snapped Narcissa. "This is my son we are talking about Bellatrix. Something you can not possibly understand. I love him more than you could ever know."

An awkward silence stretched between the three members of the room and Bellatrix shifted her weight from foot to foot restlessly.

"The bodies are gone," said Snape breaking the silence.

"Why would they take them?" asked Naricssa.

"There is a chance..." said Snape slowly. "Draco...may have still been alive at the time."

Narcissa moaned and covered her face.

"Even if he was alive then he is gone now," said Voldemort stepping into the room. "As is your husband Narcissa." Narcissa felt the hackles rise on the back of her neck. The audacity of the bastard.

"What?" she asked, his words finally actually registering in Narcissa's mind.

"Lucius' body is the study if you wish to say your final farewells before disposing of his remains," Voldemort's words were intended to be of comfort, but looking in his face Narcissa saw something else. If she was not mistaken the dark lord seemed almost...pleased.

Narcissa turned cold.

She knew that Voldemort was evil. She had always known.

Her husband had chosen to follow him and his ideals. There had been enough that Narcissa had agreed with...enough dogma that she had been raised on that she had silently gone along. Now that she had nothing left, she had no desire to follow as her sister did. The dark lord standing in front of her was the reason why her only son was dead and she was standing alone in her own house as a widow,

Voldemort was to blame for the fact that Draco was dead.

Voldemort was the one who had refused to remove the dark mark.

If he had only agreed then Draco would still be alive.

She would make him pay.

She had no idea how, but in that moment Narcissa resolved to exact vengeance and payment for the loss of her son's life.

She would do whatever it took.

"Show me my husband," ordered Narcissa and Voldemort led the way back to Lucius study.

* * *

Narcissa looked down at her husband's frozen form. She swallowed as tears slipped down her cheeks. She hated him for what he had done to their family and for the loss of her son...and yet she had loved him. Things hadn't always been so bad. There was a time where he had wooed her, even though he hadn't technically had to since they had been betrothed from birth.

He had been dashing and funny and smart and her family had loved him.

She felt his loss deep in her chest.

Narcissa closed her eyes as she waved her wand sending his body into ash in the air. She cast a spell and the ashes slipped into a urn which she placed on Lucius desk with care.

She would not miss him in the way that she would miss Draco. A part of her could not mourn the loss of her husband since she held him partially to blame for the loss of her only son.

Narcissa straightened. She was not alone in the room and she could feel the eyes of the others on her as she stood firm. Despite the pain and anguish inside her, Narcissa's mind was moving a million miles a minute. There was something that didn't quite add up.

 _They took his body,_ the thought came to her from out of nowhere. Draco's body was not in his room which meant they had either destroyed it, which did not make sense for the heat of battle so, what was more likely was…that they had taken him.

 _Which means..._

It meant that even though Voldemort had said Draco was dead there was a chance that she could at least bring his body home and say her last farewell.

 _You already said goodbye when he woke up thanks to the phoenix tears,_ she argued with herself.

 _Yes,_ she answered back, _but now he is gone for real and I need to lay his body to rest._

"What is the plan now?" asked Narcissa without looking back at the Dark Lord. Her voice hollow, even though her heart was filled with a hate that she was worried he would see through.

"Now we get revenge on the Potter and Weasley boy for what he did to your son," said Voldemort.

Narcissa steeled herself, pushing a perfect mask into place as she turned to face the dark Lord.

She looked him in the eye.

"Very good," said Narcissa with a smile.

* * *

"I know what it is," said Fred turning to Luna. Doubt suddenly filled him "Or at least I think I do…" He trailed off. "There's no penalty for getting it wrong…is there?"

"No," Luna shook her head. "Other than not being allowed in." She smiled and then added. "You know it's not always about being right or wrong…" she reached up at patted Fred's head.  
"It's about using your brain," she smiled "If you reason well that's what matters."

Fred looked down at Luna Lovegood and decided that he liked the girl exactly the way she was. He had never really gotten to know her but had, admittedly wondered what it was exactly Harry saw in her. Now he knew. She was kind-hearted, loyal, sweet and clearly very intelligent albeit airy.

"Go on then," she encouraged.

"What grows in winter, dies in summer and grows with its roots up," Fred smiled at Luna and then turned to the doorknob. "Something doesn't have to be a plant to have roots, people have roots with their families…but I think this time its more literal." Fred took a breath. "And if its not a plant that means it doesn't have to be in the ground to grow…Its clearly seasonal and likes the cold but not the hot... because it melts…"

Luna smiled back at Fred figuring it out along with him.

"It's an icicle," they both said simultaneously.

"Well solved," said the doorknocker and the door to Ravenclaw tower swung softly open.

"That was very nicely done Fred," said Luna with her usual lilt. "I like that riddle," she gave him a smile. "I will have to tell it to my father when I see him next. I think he will like it too."

Luna gently took hold of Fred's hand that wasn't hurt. They froze when they saw that the room was occupied by Alecto Carrow. She was sitting in one of the chairs snoring lightly, a goblet of wine on the floor next to her dangling fingers.

Luna nodded for Fred to follow and they tip-toed past the sleeping Carrow twin and down the far passageway of the Ravenclaw tower.

"You best wait here," said Luna. "If she wakes up and sees me she won't think anything of it, but you're a little more conspicuous."

"Aright," said Fred. "But I really do want to get to my sister.."

"Of course," said Luna. "I'll fix you up and we'll go straight there," she patted his shoulder and led him over to a stone bench. "You just sit and relax Fred. I'll be back before you can count the bones on a Thestrals back."

A movement caught Fred's eye and he jumped.

"Who's there?" he asked and his eyes caught sight of a beautiful young woman floating in the air several yards off.

"It's alright Fred," said Luna turning back. "That's the Grey Lady, she's quite lovely actually. I often talk with her."

"Oh," said Fred. "Hello," he gave a small wave. The ghost nodded and flitted away.

Luna walked back to Fred.

"Her name is actually Helena Ravenclaw. Ginny told me that Harry had a vision about her and the Ravenclaw Diadem."

"I heard a story about her. Didn't she take her mother's Dia-"

"That's a bit of a sensitive subject," said Luna cutting him off. She leaned in "Harry sent word that the Diadem is actually one of the Horcruxes-one of those little items that they need to find and destroy to kill you-know-who, but she won't tell anyone where it is," Luna straightened. "I don't want to ask her, though I feel like I should…because I know we need it to defeat him…but I also know people keep pestering her about it-they always have to try and get better grades which is silly and cheating.." She frowned. "I'm going to go set that salve now. You stay put," she pulled out her wand. "Here," she said. "Just in case." She gave him a smile and then walked off.

The grey lady lingered floating not far off. She seemed to move away each time that Fred tried to start up a conversation so instead Fred let out a sigh and patted out a rhythm his lap.

"Are you hurt?" the woman finally asked coming closer.

Fred was surprised at how pleasant and how young she sounded.

"Only a little," he answered "Had a lot worse a week or so ago, this hardly feels like anything."

"What happened?" she asked coming to however nearer to him.

"I'll tell you," said Fred. "But you have to promise it stays between us two," Fred found himself saying.

 _No, what are you doing, you can't talk about this with her!_

It was no use, he felt the pull of the Felix Felicis. The words wanted to come out of his mouth and he felt sure there was nothing he could do about it.

The ghost nodded and floated a little closer coming to sit on a bench to his left.

"I was trying to save my friend," said Fred. "She was being held at the Malfoy manner by you-know-who."

The ghost made a face and rushed away.

"I hate him," she said. "He...took..." she let her words trailed off.

"He's taken a lot from a lot of people," said Fred. "He took my friend. We all went to try and get her back and I got an axe in the face," he tapped his eye patch. "I was in a coma for three days apparently and when I woke up I thought I was going to be even worse off." The words were all coming tumbling out one after another.

"What happened?" she asked turning back to him slowly.

"Well...the most unlikely of people saved me," answered Fred.

 _And now here you go blowing their cover…_

"Who?" she asked.

Fred wanted to bite his tongue, but all of a sudden a warm feeling came over him letting him know that everything was going to be just fine.

"Draco Malfoy," he blurted.

It felt good to let it out.

"Luna has spoken of him before," said the ghost. "She said he was one of the people holding her captive when she was away. She said that he brought her food."

"Yeah, well that sound like him… turns out...he decided to go against you-know-who in order to save my friend and then me," Fred shrugged. "And now...he's trying to make up for the bad that he's done."

"And will you forgive him?" she asked seeming intensely interest in his answer.

"You know," said Fred. "I already did, but what's more important is that the person he has treated the worst over all the years has forgiven him. He's changed and is making amends for all the things he's done wrong."

"I've done bad things too," said Helena. She looked like she was about to cry and Fred felt bad for her. He wanted to tell her that it wasn't too late to make amends, but with her being dead he couldn't know if that was true and it would just be a dick move to say she could make it better if she literally couldn't.

He opened his mouth to comfort her and instead found himself asking:

"What happened?"

She paused and then came and sat down on the bench opposite him. She looked own at her lap and then met his eyes.

"I took my mother's diadem," she said. "I shouldn't have...I sought to make myself cleverer, to make myself more important than her," she looked at Fred and he could swear he saw a tear drop down her translucent cheek. "I ran away with it," she confessed.

"But you gave it to someone else didn't you?" asked Fred, not knowing where the question had come from. Helena closed her eyes

"I had…no idea…he was flatterin," she looked up at Fred's face. "He seemed to understand to sympathize….but he lied."

"He's lied to a lot of people," said Fred. "Fooled a lot of people into following him. He's done some horrible things…." Fred trailed off.

"He…he tainted it." She said clearly upset. She turned away and began to leave.

"My friend wants to destroy it," blurted Fred.

"Why?" she asked looking back at Fred.

"Because it will help them kill HIM."

There was a pause.

"Boy...what is your name?"

"I'm Fred."

"You're not a Ravenclaw," she said.

"No," Fred shook his head. "I'm not."

"You have an honest face...but I...mischief there too," she seemed to be studying him, trying to decide something. Fred opted for honesty.

"I can't deny it," he shrugged.

"If..." she seemed to hesitate. "I want to make amends as well," she said and looked Fred straight in the eye. "I want you to destroy it."

"If you tell me where it is I promise I will make sure that it is destroyed," said Fred with determination. She nodded and touched the side of Fred's face gently. He could almost feel her there.

"If you have to ask you'll never know," She said softly. "If you know, you need only ask."

* * *

 **And there you go. That was a very, very long chapter (Just over 8k again) And a much less dark and depressing one (at least in comparison to the last few all things considered.)**

 **I hope you all don't mind the brief break to catch up on everything else, and Fred-our dear darling Fred. I hope you liked the chapter. We will be back to our mains next week with the next update. Till then thanks so much for reading and please...drop me a review if you can find it in your hearts to show me some love.**

 **And yeah, in case anyone was wondering...(which I know at least a handful are) This story has still quite a bit left before its done. I'm doing my best to write it as a true "what if" so my brain answered with Fred getting to talk to the Grey lady instead of Harry since everyone is at a different time and place than they were in deathly hollows at this point. I mashed past of the scene and description from the books and a little from the movie once again and then made it my own. I like the idea of weaving in the theme of redemption/amends. Do you like it? I hope you all liked it. Would love to know what people think of Fred being kind of a main/heroic and also how you like my choice to solve the issue of getting the Diadem without Harry being in Hogwarts.**


	43. Chapter 41: The Verisaserum

**I am especially thankful to** : LillsBills, Dauntless10, tomfeltonswifey, Ayr , roon0, Jedi SteelWolf, mega700201, mmiller0000, apls79 , Vic92091, TripleLLL, Weatherthestorm, inkwolf199, addictedtoloveandfiction, cbacon1972 , Fanficfan826 , jacpin2002, BeYourOwnLivingHistory, ChildofBrisingr , Aid4 , roguesc9, Addfam2008, . .Me , .Babe, **and guests** "Carolyn" ,"D", "Guest", "Who" **I always appreciate you guys but this week I appreciate you more than usual after getting a review that hurt a fair bit. I know I need things like that to toughen up my writers skin, but thank you for being there with your lovely reviews because I have been turning to them and re-reading them each time I need something to wipe away the negative inside my brain. Thank you.**

 **Also special thank you to** Beccax95 **for saving** "Neville" **by politely pointing out the misspell on his name. I 100% appreciate this kind of review because it helps me fix things and make it better, because...I mean... my goal is to tell a story and to improve my writing.**

 **Another long one folks (7k...my wrist was getting sore towards the end) This was a difficult chapter to write as far as writing all of the plot lines together. It is my first time trying to weave so many strands all at once. I hope that I did an okay job and that it is both easy to follow and enjoyable to read. (Fingers crossed, I only re-wrote and re-ordered it and the next chapter...7 times as of tonight)**

 **This chapter is dedicated to** Dauntless10 **for calling "it" ahead of time.**

* * *

Chapter 41: The Veritaserum

Hermione was wrapped and tangled in the darkness.

There was no light with her, only dark...only black.

She could feel the darkness was trying to consume her.

It wanted to wanted to destroy every bit of her on the most basic of levels until there was nothing left.

The darkness pulsed with a cold shiver constricting and writhing in and out of her in a nauseating rhythm.

She felt as if she had been battling forever.

Time was loosing meaning... reality seemed to keep on going in an endless tunnel of black and cold.

Was this her new eternity?

How could she keep going on?

 _It will be better if you just let go,_ some dark part of her mind whispered.

 _You can finally be at peace, relax...let go._ The voice crooned gently in her ear. The idea was so seductive. For a moment she entertained the thought as she did she felt the darkness swell triumphantly.

 _No_ , she fought back.

She needed to keep going on, for her family, for her friends... for Draco...

An image of her captor turned savior began to form in her mind looking at her with that intense gaze that said so much more than words could.

Hermione focused on him and suddenly the dark didn't feel as cold.

His eyes, those beautiful intense eyes, were looking only at her... pleading with her for something...

 _He wants you to live,_ the lighter voice in her head said.

Hermione closed her eyes to see him better.

In her mind she painted him head to toe, remembering every detail from the silk of his hair to the elegance of his hands. She envisioned every inch of him that she could and then she paused at the memory of his arm and image of the dark Mark branded there.

Little pieces of thoughts began to form and click together past the pain, past the cold, past the darkness.

The curse fed from the dark mark...

Hermione felt a surge of renewed strength in her soul. the Darkness seemed to sense it and tried to squeeze her tighter.

 _You won't win,_ she told it fighting back.

 _You have nothing to feed off of now,_ she felt triumphant- almost giddy with the sure knowledge that she could win for one simple reason:

The curse had fed off of the power of the dark mark. It had used the mark to grow stronger to keep its hold on Draco. Hermione didn't have a dark mark. She had never been nor would she ever be a deatheater.

She smiled inwardly and bit down with everything she could. This time her teeth went through the thick vine of darkness in her mouth. She gurgled in pain as the acid burned her mouth, and yet the pain somehow seemed secondary to the small victory.

The Darkness hissed as she spat it out.

In the pitch she raised her head with purpose and spoke calmly and defiantly to her enemy and said:

"I will beat you."

* * *

Luna returned with the salve in hand and a cheery look on her face. Her footsteps were soft and Fred found himself in awe that the little blond girl didn't trudge more given everything she had been through. After all he knew she had been a captive at the manor as well.

She seemed to catch his expression and cocked her head to the side.

"What is it?" she asked pleasantry. "You've got quite the look on your face."

"I think I know where the Diadem is," answered Fred.

"Well that's wonderful," said Luna and she sat down on the bench and gestured for Fred to join her. She lifted his hand with delicate precision and began cleaning it.

Fred hissed slightly at the pain as the cloth snagged a piece of skin.

"Sorry," said Luna.

"Its okay, you're doing fine," he reassured her.

A quiet moment passed between them as Luna worked.

"She told you then?" Luna asked as she applied the salve with delicate fingertips.

"Yes," said Fred watching her work.

"You must have made quite an impression on her," said Luna lightly. "I think its because you have a good heart."

The compliment warmed him oddly.

"What makes you say that?" asked Fred.

"Its simple," said Luna. "I can see it in your eyes...or rather eye," she corrected pleasantly. Somehow her voice was kind without having any pity in it, which was a relief to Fred. He didn't want to turn into a pity case.

 _I can see why Neville has such a crush on her_ , he thought mildly.

"So where is it then?" she asked finishing up with his hand and setting it down lightly.

"I think..."said Fred "That its in the room of lost things."

"Oh, well we will have to get it tonight then," She stood. "We should get going now actually. People have already started waking up. We should get you to see your sister while its still safe."

"I can't wait till tonight," said Fred standing to follow her.

"And why is that?" asked Luna gently as she led him back through the castle quietly.

"I only have twenty four hours of luck, if we wait past eight it will all be used up."

"Twenty four hours of luck?" she looked back at him. "Oh, I see...where did you get your hands on a vial of Felix Felicis?"

"Draco."

"See, you don't say his name like the rest of them," said Luna as they neared the common room.

"What do you mean?" asked Fred quietly.

"There's no venom when you say his name. There used to be...and you all called him Malfoy, not Draco."

"Yes, well..." Fred didn't know how to explain.

"Its alright," said Luna. "People chance. Your opinion is allowed to chance when new information comes to light. Its like when you are researching an essay. If you find out new information it changes how you interpret the whole picture." She smiled. "It does leave us with a bit of a conundrum though," said Luna. She paused, clearly thinking and then nodded. "We'll figure something out I'm sure," she gave him a reassuring smile. "We should be quiet now, we need to get past Carrow to the room of requirement without being spotted."

* * *

Draco groaned as Ron let another punch fly into the pit of his stomach.

He wretched.

Nothing came up.

It didn't matter.

Nothing did.

Without Hermione there was no point.

He coughed.

Why had she done it? He remembered the look in her eyes when they had both been together inside his head. He remembered the change when she made the decision. If only he had been stronger...if only he had known what she was going to do he could have pushed her out of his mind before she could go and do something so stupid as to take his place.

She had taken the curse that was killing him and it had clearly killed her.

 _"You can blame yourself for the fact that you'll never see her again_ ," Ron's words from early that morning echoed in Draco's head

She had wrapped her arms around the darkness. She had pulled it out of him and into her. He had seen it take over her body. He had seen the black veins spread like wildfire through her body. It had taken days to get that bad with him. She took it all at once. It had to have been a total shock to her system.

He had seen her body with and then he had seen her body go still.

So still...

 _"You can blame yourself for the fact that you'll never see her again."_

It was his fault. It was all his fault

 _My life was not worth yours,_ he said silently.

She was dead.

She had died for him.

Without her Draco had no reason to want to go on living.

"You fucking dark Lord following scum," said Ron. "Tell me how you bloody did it!"

Draco had given up answering.

Ron wouldn't listen.

Ron was clearly beyond listening.

 _Can you blame him?_ the voice in his head asked.

 _He blames you for the fact that she's dead._

 _He's right to..._

 _Maybe he'll just finish me off..._

"TELL ME!" Ron yelled and hit him across the face. "How did you get my curse to jump from you to Hermione?"

"What?" A new voice echoed in the quiet of the tent.

Draco looked up at Harry's voice. With his one eye was swollen shut and the other had enough blood in it that the world was tinted slightly pink, it was hard to see anything clearly.

"What did you just say?" demanded Harry stepping forward.

Draco found his head lolling. He fought to stay conscious. A part of him wanted to hear this conversation even though passing out would mean a reprieve from the pain.

"He's the reason why Hermione isn't bloody moving!" yelled Ron. "He made the curse I hexed him with jump to her."

"The curse you hexed him with," repeated Harry clarifying.

Draco felt a small flicker of hate inside him.

 _If Ron hadn't cursed you she wouldn't be dead..._

 _He thought he was doing what was right. He thought you hurt her,_ he countered.

 _He used Dark Magic._

 _You would do whatever it took to save her if you could,_ thought Draco.

"Yeah, what of it?" asked Ron pausing his attack on Draco to talk with Harry and ice his bloody knuckles.

"What the hell kind of curse did you use Ron?" demanded Harry. "No one in camp knows what the hell happened to her and now you're saying its from a curse you put on Draco?" Harry's voice rose in pitch.

"It doesn't fucking matter," said Ron. "The damage is done. I just want to know how he did it and why he isn't dead."

"Of course it bloody matters!" said Harry.

Draco was mildly surprised at the dark haired boy's reaction. He was surprised that Potter cared at all about the 'why' and 'how'

"Don't look at me like that," said Ron, clearly catching the same judgment that Draco was hearing in Potter's voice.

Ron pointed to Draco. "This is his fault not mine."

"That's DARK magic Ron," said Harry, his temper Flaring.

Even with the blurring of his sight Draco recognized the looked in Harry's face. It was the same one he had seen before Harry had hexed him in the washroom. He was livid.

"It's Dark Magic for DEATHEATERS," said Ron defensively. "It doesn't hurt normal people."

"Well clearly it does," Harry shot back.

"That's his doing not mine," Ron pointed to Draco.

"You need to leave," growled Harry sounding as if he were almost at the breaking point.

"Not bloody likely," answered Ron turning to red that his face was nearly the same shade as his hair. Draco would have laughed at the tomato effect were the circumstances different. He wasn't quite sure if his ribs were broken at this point though, so laughing was probably a bad idea when he was struggling just to breath.

"You're out of control," Harry shot back. Draco raised the one eyebrow that was able to move at Harry's words.

"Why aren't you?" demanded Ron. Do you think I'm overreacting huh?" Ron half yelled. "That creature tortured her," said Ron. "FOR WEEKS. We found her in his room. The room where he probably RAPED her whenever the fuck he felt like it. He DESERVES to hurt. He deserves this," Ron shoved at Harry's chest. "Why the hell aren't you mad? Why aren't you taking it out of him piece by piece? HUH? I thought you were supposed to care about her. If you cared you would want to hurt him back for everything he's done."

"I do want to hurt him," said Harry shoving Ron back. "But it isn't going to solve anything."

"I don't give a fuck if it solves anything," said Ron, shaking his head in disgust at his friend. "Its what he deserves. Its justice."

"Justice is a court hearing."

Draco snorted and coughed from the blood.

"You keep quiet," ordered Harry.

"Yeah," said Ron," Laugh why don't you, funny isn't it?" he stepped back towards Draco and Draco couldn't help but sneer up at the redhead, though he wasn't sure if it looked like a wince given the state of his face.

The blow did not come as a surprise, but what happened after did.

"Ron!" Harry yelled grabbing back the Weasely's attention. "You need to stop."

"Oh right, sure, stop, let them handle it." Ron threw up his hands in exasperation. "Because they are going to lock up the son of one of the richest and most powerful families in the whole of the wizarding world and make him pay for his crimes" Ron barked a laugh. "Fat chance."

 _He's not wrong,_ thought Draco. He had always had the protection of his family at times it had made him feel invincible...at least until the dark Lord had come. Once Voldemort arrived on the scene Draco learned how utterly meaningless that kind of protection was when faced with true evil.

Draco watched as Ron stepped closer to Harry almost pleading with him to see his side.

"Don't you see? This is our chance to make sure he pays for what he's done. It might be the only chance."

Harry had nothing to say and Draco couldn't blame him.

For a moment he saw things through there eyes and in that moment he didn't blame Ron for beating him to a bloody pulp.

If the roles were reversed and he had his hands on anyone who dared hurt Hermione he would do the same.

He had wanted to kill Greyback and Greyback hadn't ever succeeded...Ron thought he had been using Hermione for Weeks...how could he blame Ron for wanting him dead?

"What's going on in here?" asked Remus coming into the tent and breaking the silence. "Everyone can hear you fighting."

"Get him out of here Professor," said Harry. "And get me some truth serum."

"I'm not leaving," said Ron.

Remus Lupin took one look at Ron's bloody knuckles and Draco's bloody face and Draco could see the decision to side with Harry before the older man even opened his mouth.

"I think its best you take a break," said Remus.

"No," said Ron.

"Just go dammit!" yelled Harry.

Mr. Weasely came into the tent.

"What's going on?" MR. Weasely asked and Draco inwardly rolled his eyes. Trust them to need a whole comity to decide who to have extract information form him. This was taking so much longer than it needed to. He didn't give a fuck who was torturing him, but listening to the bullshit was annoying as fuck.

He would rather just have someone hit him. The pain outside made the pain inside vanish for whole seconds at a time. When all he could feel was the pain in his face and side it wiped out all chances of thinking of her...

Hermione...the thought of her made his eyes water.

"Ronald, why don't you come with me now. Your mother wants you to eat," Mr. Weasely held out his arm opening the tent flap.

"Whatever," Ron finally said, clearly catching that it was useless to protest when so outnumbered. He stormed out furiously.

"I'd best follow," said Mr. Weasely. He offered Harry and Remus each a small nod and left.

"And I'll go have a look and see what we have in the way of truth serums," said Remus and he ducked out.

Silence filled the tent.

Draco coughed. The moisture from his eyes was running into his nose and he knew he looked a wreck and like a wuss crying from pain.

Harry made a sound of disgust and left.

 _He'll never understand_ , thought Draco.

 _He'll never know the truth...never believe it._

Draco wasn't crying from the blood or what Ron had done to him, he had endured worse. The tears that fell were for her.

* * *

Hermione struggled against the Darkness.

She clawed it back.

The acid burned through her nails and through the skin on her fingers.

She didn't care.

She was going to fight until she beat the darkness back.

Jaws clamped onto her shoulder and she screamed.

She closed her eyes and focused on Draco's face and the light that seemed to grow while thinking of him.

Then she reached back and tore into the darkness.

Hermione smiled when she heard the darkness howl.

* * *

Harry stood over Hermione's body.

He looked down at the woman who had been his best friend for years. She looked so pale and fragile, nothing like the strong woman he knew. Her body was covered in small black veins reminding him why she wasn't moving, why she might never wake up.

 _Draco did this too her,_ Harry clenched his fists. He tortured her, he hurt her...he had probably...raped her. Harry didn't want to think about that. He didn't want to think about any of that.

He wanted to kill the Slytherin boy.

 _But if Ron hadn't cursed him._

Harry took off his glasses for a moment and rubbed his face. How had Ron learned a spell that no one else seemed to recognize and was tapered-supposedly-to kill only Deatheaters.

And how had Draco managed to make it jump to Hermione?

Harry had thought Draco was getting better, that maybe after the astronomy tower he had turned over a new leaf.

 _You were wrong,_ he told himself, y _ou were so wrong._

Harry knew that Draco had known it was him at the mansion...and yet Draco hadn't turned them over. Why help them then and now turn back to the dark?

Harry shook his head in disgust as he thought of the photograph. The image of Draco standing behind and holding up a bruised and bloody Hermione was forever burned into Harry's mind.

Harry would never forget that.

He could never forgive that.

 _And now this..._ He looked down again and paused. There was something different about Hermione.

Hadn't the veins been all the way up her cheek? He leaned down to inspect them closer.

"Harry," a voice came from behind him and Mrs. Weasely stepping into the room.

"Yes Mrs. Weasely?" he asked straightening and turning to the older woman.

"You need to eat," she said and held out a plate of breakfast for him.

Harry blinked and his stomach growled loudly in response as if his body had just figured out that he hadn't eaten in the last day.

"Thanks," said Harry. "I'm not hungry."

"Nonsense," said Mrs. Weasely. "Do you think she would want you starving yourself. Eat up. You need your strength."

Harry took a muffin from off the tray and took an obedient bite.

"I'm worried about my Ron," she said sitting down on a chair near him. "I don't think its good for him to be the one interrogating Draco. It should be one of the other members of the order." She twisted her hands together anxiously.

Harry couldn't help but agree with her.

Ron had every right to be upset. Harry was feeling just as upset as Ron, but in a different way. Hermione was like his sister to Ron she was...more, or at least different. That still didn't mean that Harry approved of Ron beating the ever-living shit out of Draco.

 _How would you feel if you had the man who had beaten tortured and Raped Ginny here in front of you?_

 _I'd kill him,_ thought Harry darkly.

"I don't think he'll let anyone else do it," said Harry even though a part of Harry wanted to do exactly what Ron had been doing and take out vengeance on Hermione's behalf pound by pound and punch by punch.

"He's your friend he might listen to you," said Mrs, Weasely.

"Ron doesn't exactly have a history of listening to me, and He's not thinking clearly right now," said Harry taking another bite without thinking.

"He needs to heal. There has been too much blood and loss for him lately," Mrs. Weasely's eyes filled ."For all of us."

Harry's mind went to Fred.

He felt the ache of his friends loss deep in his chest.

True he had Fred had never been best friends that position was held equally by both Ron and Hermione, but it didn't change the fact that he had considered Ron's older brother a friend. The Twins had always been there for him. They were family.

"Yes," said Harry looking back at Hermione.

Mrs. Weasely was right. They all needed to heal.

"I'll see what I can do," he said and then looked to Mrs. Weasely. "Will you stay with her?"

"Of course love," she said nodding solemnly.

"Thank you."

* * *

Fred saw his sisters hair before she turned around, the bright sheen of her straight red hair was unmistakable.

He felt his chest squeeze.

 _Its been too long..._

Only this kind of separation was harder. It was one thing to not see a family member for a week or even several weeks when it was planned. It was a completely different thing to not see them because you couldn't see them.

Fred stood frozen amid the hanging hammocks and pallets that students were using as their safe haven and waited for her to turn around and see him.

The whole room went dead silent as people recognized what was happening.

Fred swallowed nervously. Was it a good idea for people to know? What if someone said something.

He looked around the room.

 _You can trust these people,_ a small voice said inside him. _They all want what you want or they wouldn't be here._

He felt Luna's hand slip into his for a brief moment and give him a reassuring squeeze. He glanced down at her and gave her a thankful look. She nodded seeming to understand and then slipped away back into the crowd.

As she let go Ginny turned around.

Time seemed to suspend for a moment and Fred watched Ginny's face shift from surprise to confusion and then her eyes widened and filled with moisture.

"Fred?" she said his name with trepidation-clad hope.

"Hi Ginny," Fred managed swallowing.

She ran to him.

A hug had never felt so good.

He wrapped his arms around his little sister and held her close as she cried into his shoulder in great hiccups of joy. People clapped and hollered and patted him on the back. Everyone came in close and Fred greeted his fellow students one by one.

He caught sight of Luna standing off to the side giving him space and he met her smile with his own.

* * *

Draco wasn't sure how long he was unconscious, but he knew the moment he started Dreaming because Hermione was there with him.

She was dressed all in white. The soft gown she wore fluttered around her body in an invisible breeze. He felt his chest squeeze painfully.

She turned and smiled at him with a small smile and he took it as a sign that it was okay to close the space between them. His arms ached to hold her.

She didn't move from her spot, waiting for him to come to her.

He stopped when he came close enough to touch and she reached up to him.

He curled into her embrace and sunk his head down to her shoulders wrapping his arms around the upper part of her torso.

"Why did you do it?" he muttered into her skin.

She didn't answer, only squeezing him a little tighter so that he knew she had heard him.

She was his light, she was his salvation, she was his peace.

And she was gone...

"Are you okay?" he asked pulling back. "Tell me you got away from it and that you're at peace at least..." he looked in her eyes and she gave another little smile caressing his cheek.

"I want to be with you," the admission broke from his lips and for the first time a small frown touched her and she shook her head ever so slightly. She knew what he was saying-knew that he meant he wanted to die to be with her.

"But why?" he asked. "No one needs me here," he said shaking his head. "What good can I do?"

She looked at him and placed her hand on his chest over his heart taking his hand in her other she placed his hand over her heart and she tilted her head down trying to convey something to him.

"You're here," he said covering her hand that was over his heart with his own free hand. "You'll always be here."

She nodded.

"You want me to live..." he said knowing it was true.

She nodded again.

"But I don't want to live without you."

Hermione's mouth quirked a little and she leaned up and have him the most chaste of kisses.

 _Let me live through you,_ he heard her voice echo around them. _Live_ ** _for_** _me Draco._

He watched as her skin grey brighter. Little white butterflies began to pull away from her skin and he watched as she broke and flew away.

* * *

Hermione wasn't sure what had happened.

One moment she was fighting literally tooth and nail and the next she was sitting on a grassy hill.

The air was calm and sweet and the birds were chirping.

A small white butterfly came and rested on her outstretched fingertips. She smiled at it and then it flew away.

She became aware that she was sitting in a shadow and she looked up to see a golden statue. She knew its features well.

 _My prince..._

"Will you stay with me?" he asked as the sun began to set.

"Draco," she breathed his name like a prayer and climbed up his golden body wrapping her arms around his neck. "I thought I lost you."

"I would never leave you," he answered back.

"But you were going to," she protested. "Hold me," she begged.

"I can't," he answered back. "I cannot move or I would."

Hermione closed her eyes.

"I need you right now Draco," she admitted. Hermione was not the kind of person who liked admitting that she needed help.

"I'm here," his voice was calm and reassuring and even though he was made of gold she felt as if he softened into her touch.

"Tell me how you fought the darkness for so long," she demanded pulling back.

"I thought of you," he answered.

Hermione threw her arms around him again, suddenly afraid to let go of him.

She needed him.

She needed to hold him.

"Will you stay with me?" he repeated as the last rays of light faded away. Hermione saw the darkness come creeping over the horizon. Fear seized her.

"I will," she managed to answer. She held him tight as the Darkness came for her.

* * *

Harry walked back into the tent and found Draco looking off into the distance calmly. Something about his disposition had changed drastically in the few hours since Harry had last seen him.

It was slightly off putting to see him so calm. Before he had looked desolate and defeated, now he looked...at peace.

 _He shouldn't be allowed to feel peaceful_ , thought Harry darkly.

Harry administered the potion to Draco while professor Lupin stood by arms folded across his chest.

Both were rather surprised when Draco simply drank it down without fighting.

"What are the Dark Lord's plans?" asked Harry.

"I don't know," answered Draco. Harry folded his arms across his chest. "He doesn't monologue often," added Draco.

Harry hit Draco across the face. He hadn't meant to... hadn't thought... just acted.

Another question burned in him and he asked it even though it wasn't relevant to winning the war in the slightest.

"How could you do what you did to Hermione?"

"I had to," Draco answered.

"Bullshit." Harry turned away. "That's what the guards said who put people to death in the camps. I was following orders 'I had to'" Harry scoffed in disgust.

"Harry..." came Remus voice.

"It's fine," said Harry and he took a steadying breath he turned back to Draco and saw...pain in the blond's eyes.

 _Is he afraid of what we'll do to him?_

 _Maybe I can use that to get him to help._

"Do you know anything that could help us?" asked Harry trying a more gentle approach.

"Yes," answered Draco flatly.

"Well..." said Harry waiting for Draco to elaborate. "Tell me."

"Why?" asked Draco. "Why should I?" There was something in Draco's voice that made Harry feel like he was being tested.

"If you are worried what the Dark Lord will do if you tell us-" started Harry.

"I'm not," Draco cut him off abruptly. "I really don't care if he kills me anymore. I'm not afraid of dying." Draco's voice held no waver in it and Harry realized he wasn't fighting the serum to tell the truth he was simply speaking the truth of his own volition.

 _Or maybe he's stronger...or knows Occlumency._ The later seemed likely given who his mentor was.

Harry frowned, that answer... was very unlike the Draco he knew.

"Remus give me another dose."

Remus didn't argue, clearly thinking the same thing. Harry brought the potion to Draco's lips and felt disquieted by the fact that Draco looked at him unwavering with his one good eye, as he drank down to serum.

"We can protect you," said Harry when he stepped back. "If you help us."

"I don't want or need your protection," said Draco. He seemed to struggle for a moment and then added "You and I both know that the Weasel wants me dead. He already tried to kill me once."

"What is he talking about?" asked Lupin. Harry turned to his teacher.

"Ron cast a killing curse that only harms Deatheaters, on Draco...somehow Draco made it jump to Hermione."

"I DID NOT!" Draco yelled making them both jump.

Harry turned back to him.

"I did NOT make it jump to her," growled Draco angrily and he flexed against the bonds.

"Then why is she-"

"She took it from me," for the first time since Harry had come back into the tent he heard Draco's voice crack with emotion.

 _Why is he emotional about her taking the curse from him?_

"Why would she do that?" asked Lupin voicing the question that Harry wanted to ask.

"Because she..." he seemed to struggle and shook his head.

"Tell us!" demanded Harry. "Why would she take the curse from you?"

"Because she felt like she had to!" yelled Draco. "She felt like she owed me." he shook his head. "I wish to tell she hadn't." Draco looked away.

"You expect me to believe that?" asked Harry. "Why on earth would she feel like she owed you anything after what you did to her?"

"I don't know," said Draco.

"Bullshit!"

"Professor we need something stronger. Do we have Verritaserum anywhere in the camp?"

"Its not healthy to give different types of-"

"I don't care, I need to know the truth."

Lupin reached inside his shirt pocket reluctantly handed over another vial.

This time Draco did not cooperate.

Harry forced nearly a dozen drops of the liquid down his throat covering Draco's mouth and nose with is hand until the blond boy swallowed. Then he stood back and waited as Draco strained furiously against his bonds.

"I've never heard of a curse like that," Lupin said to Harry as they waited for it to take full effect.

"You might have at some point," interrupted Draco. "But they did their best to erase all knowledge of it."

"How does Ron know it?" asked Harry.

"I don't know," answered Draco.

"How did Hermione take it from you if it is only supposed to work on Deatheaters?"

"She took the curse, pulled it back with her through the bind," Draco's shoulders slumped forward and he coughed.

"The Bind?" asked Harry frowning.

 _What is he talking about?_

"Am I to understand that you-know-who did the binding spell between you and Ms. Granger?" asked Lupin.

Draco nodded.

"What is that?" asked Harry looking to Remus.

"Its something that the Dark Lord used to use to keep people in line," Remus said darkly. "He would do it most often to couples where one wanted to follow him and the other did not. It lets you know when the one you are bound to is in danger. Its very uncomfortable and if you care about the person very disturbing." Lupin paused. "He would torture the person you loved and you would know that they were in trouble every time he did it."

"That's monstrous."

"Its is," agreed Lupin. "It also acts as a tracker. If a husband or a wife ran away from the the 'life' of following him, he could use the other to track them down."

"So..." said Harry and then it began to sink in. he turned looking at Draco with a mild sense of horror. "He bound you to Hermione?"

"Yes," answered Draco.

"And she used that bind to save you?" asked Harry confused and then angry. "Why?"

"Because of what I did for her."

"What? Tortured her? Raped her?!"

"Harry," Lupin's voice was a warning.

"I never touched her like that!" snapped Draco.

There was a pause at how vehemently he said it.

"Why should I believe you?" asked Harry.

"Because you've given me enough serum to drown a pixie," snapped Draco. "And because I would never hurt her like that."

"But you tortured her."

"Yes," Draco's voice was dark but he met Harry's gaze unwavering. Harry felt oddly ill-at ease from that stare.

"So why would she want to save you?"

Draco was silent.

"ANSWER ME DAMMIT!" asked Harry, feeling as if he were on the verge of discovering something, without having any idea what it could be.

Harry slapped Draco open palmed across the face so that his hand tingled with the force of it.

"Harry that's enough," Remus came forward.

"I don't understand why she would take his place," Harry said looking at his professor.

"I wish she hadn't," came Draco.

"You expect me to believe you are actually upset that she saved your life?" demanded Harry looking back at Draco

"YES!" Draco yelled. "She shouldn't have. I'm not worth it," said Draco shaking his head. "I'd rather it was me. I'd rather be dead."

Harry could feel his heartbeat in his temples.

What the hell was going on?

"Harry," said Remus touching his shoulder. He gestured with his head that they should go outside to speak and Harry followed him. He glanced back at Draco just before exiting the tent and found Draco's piercing gaze boring into him. He shivered and closed the tent turning to his teacher.

"Something isn't right," said Remus folding his arms, he pointed with a single finger back at the tent "That is not the way a man who had fun torturing a person acts."

"I know," said Harry. "He could be faking it..."

"Do you really believe that?" asked Remus looking at Harry intently.

Confusion swirled inside Harry and he looked back at the tent.

"I...I don't know what to believe."

* * *

When Hermione awoke within her mind she found herself suddenly faced off against the darkness.

It shifted and oozed across the landscape inside her. As the world began to form around her, she glanced quickly around and found she was at Hogwarts fighting the darkness in the main hall.

Lighting and thunder echoed over head as the ceiling rolled with power.

The darkness rose up growling at her.

"You won't beat me," said Hermione. "I won't let you take me down."

The darkness hissed at her and she lashed out with her wand sending a beam of light towards it.

The darkness responded shooting out a slick web of black acid.

"Do you honestly think you can stop it?" demanded Ron from the sidelines.

Hermione dodged as the leech shot out another black web towards her.

"Its your fault that I have to fight this is the first place Ronald Weasely," she shouted lashing out with her wand again.

She landed a strike and the smell of it burning was atrocious like rotten eggs mixed with the smell of burning garbage.

"No its not," protested Ron. "The curse wasn't meant for you."

The leech rose up towering over Hermione and she turned and ran as it followed in a thunderous pursuit.

"No, you meant to kill Draco with it," Hermione half yelled as she rolled under one of the tables and fired a shot with her wand.

"Exactly," said Ron as if it made perfect sense.

"Why?" she demanded jumping up onto the adjacent table and running down the length of it before turning to attack the black again.

"Because he was hurting you," said Ron.

"He was protecting me!" she protested.

"Ha-ha," said Ron. "Very funny. Quit kidding around like that."

"I'm not kidding around," said Hermione and the black lashed out again. This time a piece of the web hit her arm and she screamed in pain as it burned her flesh like acid.

"You brought this on yourself," said Ron. "If you hadn't fallen for him he would be dead and we would be together."

The darkness flipped the table Hermione was standing on and Hermione landed flat on her back. Ron walked over to her and knelt beside her looking down at her but not bothering to help her up.

"Why on earth did you try and save him?" Ron asked.

"Because he saved me."

The Darkness fell on her and Hermione screamed.

* * *

Narcissa sat in her study her eyes intently focused on the small grains of blue sand that were slipping past the pinched center of her hourglass and piling neatly on the bottom.

 _I am alone..._ the thought flitted through her mind unbidden.

She closed her eyes briefly and a single tear slid down her cheek. She wiped it away furiously.

 _There is no time for that now Narcissa,_ she told herself and look at deep breath and focused on the grains of sand once more. They were helping her think and right now that was what she needed to do. She needed to think and she needed to plan. She could not let someone rule the world who would sacrifice children out of haughty arrogance.

she was not the only mother in the world and she would be damned if she let the creature who was responsible for the needless death of a child rise to ultimate power.

 _You might damn yourself fighting him._

 _That's fine,_ she thought back, _I have nothing left to loose._

Her husband was dead, her son was dead and her sister...her sister had chosen to side with the monster who had let her boy die.

Lacing her fingers together she began tapping her thumbs gently against one another as she thought of ways to ensure the dark lord lost this war...and his life.

And then amid those thoughts another thought rose to the surface.

They had taken Draco's body. She needed to get it back. She would bury him properly. She would saw her final goodbye.

She paused.

 _Why take a body during the heat of battle, it would only slow you down?_

Narcissa stood and began pacing, he eye brows knit together in a furious line of tension.

 _Think logically Naricssa..._

she paced.

 _Why take a body?_

There was only one reason that made sense.

Draco had been alive when they had taken him.

Hermione had been in the room...had the muggle born told them about the Bind and insisted they take him alone too?

Narcissa bit the flesh of her thumb beside the nail-a habit she had not let slip since her teenage years.

 _That doesn't mean he's still alive now,_ her mind argued.

 _What was the Granger girl doing in Draco's room?_

 _They say she is the cleverest witch of her age...maybe?_

"Did she?" the words spoken aloud startled Narcissa and she clamped her mouth shut.

 _You have to be careful Narcissa,_ she heard her mother's warning, _there are always people listening. The walls have ears._

Narcissa shook her head, she couldn't let herself hope. It was silly to think that the girl whom Draco had been guarding and holding hostage for weeks would want to do anything to save her. Unless...

Was there a chance that what Naricssa had said to her had lingered in the girls mind? Did she truly know that it would have been so much worse for her had someone else been in charge of her captivity? If so was there a chance that she felt some kind of debt or obligation to her son.

Narcissa pulled her thumb from her mouth and paced some more.

She hadn't felt Draco die.

Weren't mothers supposed to feel when they lost a child like that?

 _You're just in denia_ l, she thought angrily.

Her mind drifted back to Granger in the bed with Draco.

If the girl had figured out a way to save Draco then that meant that he was still alive and that the order had him.

Her footsteps faltered.

 _Even if she saved him, they'll kill him._

 _That's ridiculous Narcissa the order isn't like that,_ She told herself.

 _But the Weasely boy is the one who cursed him in the first place..._

There was a sudden sharp knock at the door.

"Go away," she ordered.

"Its me," came Severus voice from the other side of the wooden door. "I've come to talk about your son."

That gave Narcissa pause.

"Come in."

Severus Snape slipped into her study silently and closed the door behind him. He cast a silencing charm around the room and locked the door, then he turned to Narcissa.

"What do you want Severus?" she demanded. She could not trust Severus loyalties. Yes, he was a friend and yes he cared for her and her son, but his loyalty lay in the hands of the man who was responsible for her son's death.

"I know you are planning something Narcissa, and I would advise you to tread carefully. If you act against HIM there will be no coming back."

"I know where my loyalty lies," said Narcissa refusing to condemn herself by speaking out against Voldemort. She could not get revenge on the dark Lord if she was stupid enough to get herself caught.

"You made me swear the unbreakable vow to protect your son."

"Yes." Narcissa's heart began to racket in her chest. There was only one reason to be speaking of the vow.

"It is compelling me to tell you something."

Hope flashed in Narcissa's chest.

"Tell me," she demanded

"There is a chance..."said Snape. "Small as it may be, that your son...might still be alive."

* * *

 **I hope you enjoyed this chapter. So yes, the curse feeds off the dark mark and since Hermione doesn't have one she has a chance to fight it. But Draco still thinks she's dead...so fun for that. Still, now he thinks she wants him to live for her, so that's intense right?**

 **Thanks so much for reading. If you have the time send some love in a review. Cheers**


	44. Chapter 42: The Diadem

**AUTHORS NOTE: So I apologize for this chapter not being out Sunday/Monday.** **I literally fell asleep working on it IN MY CHAIR** **in my library (yes I have a library-I am a giant nerd) so right now I am up in the middle of the night Monday night writing to finish. So while for me it is still Monday (I mean 4 in the morning on monday...jeesh) I know it's going to feel like Tuesday for you guys for the upload. These last few chapters have been harder and taken longer to write then all the previous ones and I didn't take that into account ahead of time. (also they have all been longer than average this one is again over seven thousand words) Thank you for your patience and understanding. I will make sure I have the next chapter done ahead of time next week.**

 **Thank you to everyone who took the time to review last chapter:** Obscure-Reference-Girl, MsBeast, Aid4, youngar994, RubyGemGreen, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Danielle804, Ashyka0o0o0, ALIASTESIN, apls79, mb1995, wickedwitch617 , Karo190204, addictedtoloveandfiction, jacpin2002, Dauntless10, mega700201, tomfeltonswifey, Qween87 ,LillsBills, Bloodred 321, Starearth,Fanficfan826, RotcehM , CatPeach , Ayr -Chan **and guests** DramioneDestiny, "Who" and "D" **You are all appreciated.**

 **I hope you enjoy this chapter, and that all the lines wove together smoothly, and that you enjoy the one extra perspective that is making a cameo in this chapter.**

* * *

Chapter 42: The Diadem

Snape had left Narcissa alone in her study shortly after his proclamation that Draco might still be alive. It only confirmed what Narcissa had dared to hope.

If Draco was alive there was nothing she wouldn't do to make sure he kept breathing.

 _They have your son_ , her mind said darkly.

She went to the far door of her study and made her way into the master bedroom pausing only a moment looking at the massive king bed.

 _It will be so empty now..._

Narcissa closed her eyes against the thoughts.

 _Lucius betrayed this family with his greed and selfishness_ , she told herself, and yet her chest still ached for the man she had loved.

 _The man you loved died years ago..._ She reminded herself. In her heart Narcissa had always held out hope that the Lucius she had known and loved as a young woman would return to her one day when all this was over. It was a hope she had known was futile. Her bottom lip trembled despite herself and she bit it as she went over to her wardrobe and pulled out a black pant suit. It was perfectly tapered to her body. She needed clothing that moved if she was going to track down the order. Nothing was going to hamper her or impede her on her mission to rescue her son. Nothing.

Once had changed she went back to the safe from which she had retrieved the phoenix tears and pulled out a small gold key.

It was the key to her sister, Bellatrix's vault at Gringotts.

Narcissa had become a key holder and joint holder of the account upon her sisters incarceration in Azkaban. She had used her access and the gold within to buy off guards for their silence and, in order to be able to visit in private as well as bring her sister some small comforts.

Lucius had been furious with her for associating with someone who had been convicted and resided in Azkaban. She remembered their conversation well.

 _"You can't see her. I forbid it."_

 _"I am not a servant nor a slave Lucius you cannot command me ."_

 _"I am your husband."_

 _"Yes you are and you already told me to cut out one relative," she had said referring to the sibling he had forced her to disown for being a blood-traitor._

 _"You know we can't associate with people like THAT," he said his tone disgusted._

 _"Well my sister shares all your beliefs," Narcissa shot back. "So there is no reason for me to cut her out as well."_

 _"It looks bad on us," sneered Lucius. "You are a Malfoy now-_

 _"So you keep reminding me," snapped Narcissa. "As if I somehow came from somewhere less than you. You forget HUSBAND that my family line is just as old and just as pure as yours."_

Narcissa took a deep and steadying breath pushing away the memory of their fight. Now as not the time to focus on pain from the past. It was time for action.

 _Are you prepared to do what must be done?_ she asked herself.

If she did this there was no going back, the dark lord would kill her-likely slowly to make an example out of someone who dared betray him at the highest level.

Narcissa knew what was in her sisters vault. She knew about the Horcruxe's. It had been a necessity- Narcissa knowing; Bellatrix had worried that her sister might touch the goblet and be injured somehow so Bellatrix had told her just what the goblet was, swearing Narcissa to secrecy. It was a promise that Narcissa had kept.

Until now.

Bellatrix had betrayed her siding with the man who had let her son die.

Therefore Narcissa, who had never broken a promise in her life, considered this justice-payback in the highest order.

 _She will never forgive you,_ the voice in her head said darkly.

 _I will never forgive her._

Narcissa set her jaw firmly and tucked the key into her pocket.

 _I'm coming Draco,_ she thought silently. _Hold on._

* * *

Hermione was in the oasis. It was night time and the moon and starts shone brightly overhead as she fought against the Darkness on the soft sand of the beach.

Draco was laying, unconscious, only a few feet away from her. She needed to get to him. She needed to fight the darkness so that she could save him...go to him.

Hermione battled the darkness for what seemed like hours, sending spell after spell towards it, fighting with everything she had until it finally retreated into the water turning the whole ocean black.

Hermione ran to Draco and knelt down beside him touching his face. He was so pale...so thin.

"Draco, it's okay, it's gone you can wake up now," she said stroking her fingers across his cheek.

He didn't respond.

There was not so much as a flicker of an eyelash at her words.

Fear and pain clutched her chest.

If he died then this was all for nothing.

"Draco please," she pleaded. "I made it go away, you have to wake up now."

Still there was no response. He seemed to grow smaller in front of her fading.

"Draco please!" she pounded on his chest.

"PLEASE!" she begged, and then she was sobbing and hitting him, trying to wake him up until she collapsed on his chest.

The ocean rose up in a black wave swallowing them both.

* * *

Hermione's eyes flickered open.

Everything was blurry.

Everything hurt.

"Hermione?" Harry leaned over her.

Hermione blinked.

 _Am I dreaming or am I dead_? She wondered and closed her eyes squeezing them tight.

 _Why is Harry here?_

 _Where is Draco?_

"Hermione, please answer me."

There was a pleading in his voice.

She could smell the outdoors...the light was so bright.

 _This can't be a dream_...she thought.

"Harry?" she managed to speak his name, the words coming out in a strained rasp. Her vocal chords burned with the effort of speaking.

"Hermione, you're alive thank god. None of us were sure if you were ever going to wake up again."

 _Wake up again?_

 _Was I dreaming?_

 _I'm alive…_

 _Where is Draco?_

"Where am I?" she murmured and then coughed from the effort of speaking. Harry handed her some water and she sipped it down

"You're at a safe-house. You're safe Hermione. We got you out," Harry stroked her hair.

She choked on the water.

"Careful," he warned.

Hermione felt the water burn in her lungs.

She needed to find Draco.

She needed to know he was okay.

Where was he?

He wouldn't leave her alone.

Draco would never leave her alone, he had promised her.

Dark began to cloud the edges of her vision.

"Hermione..." Harry squeezed her hand. "It's okay. I've got you, you can rest. You're safe."

"Draco?" Hermione asked. The dark was pulling her back. "Where's Draco?"

She wasn't awake to hear the answer or see the look on Harry's face.

* * *

Harry left Hermione's side to tell Ron that Hermione had, thankfully, woken up.

Ron rushed to the tent and sat down next to Hermione holding her hand and talking to her in streaming sentences asking her to wake up and telling her that everything was going to be okay. Harry watched the whole thing feeling slightly numb: he was still trying to process everything that had happened in the last few hours. Namely the combination of the fact that Draco had seemed genuinely upset Hermione had taken his place, and the fact that Draco was the first person Hermione had asked about upon waking and her voice hadn't sounded scared for her own livelihood.

So Harry left Ron alone for a little while, partially because he was still reeling from the violence he had seen his friend inflict on Draco and didn't want to be near his friend at the moment, and partially because he needed to think.

Hermione had not sounded afraid when she had asked about Draco.

She had sounded concerned…. not in the way that Harry had expected.

She sounded like she was concerned FOR Draco rather than about him.

 _Maybe Malfoy was telling the truth..._

 _Of course he was, he was under the influence of the Verritaserum_ , his mind shot back.

It didn't make sense.

None of this did.

Draco was acting like Hermione had died for him...

Harry froze.

 _"I'd rather it was me. I'd rather be dead."_ Draco's words from the interrogation sounded in Harry's head.

"He doesn't know she's alive..." realization dawned on him.

The last thing Draco would have seen was Hermione lying unconscious from a curse that was supposed to kill him.

 _A curse that your best friend cast,_ the voice inside Harry's head reminded darkly.

What had happened that Draco would say something like that? The Draco Harry knew was a selfish prick, not a self-sacrificing prick.

There was something wrong about this whole situation.

 _There are a million things wrong about this situation,_ Harry told himself, _starting with the fact that one of your best friends was held captive and tortured for months._

If Draco really was telling the truth, which Harry had a feeling he was…not just because of the serum…then that meant that Hermione had _chosen_ to take the curse on Draco's behalf.

 _Why?_

Draco had said that it was because Hermione had felt like she owed him, but that didn't make any kind of sense.

Unless something had happened to her mind to make her think that...

Something like the imperius curse.

 _It wouldn't be the first time that he used it,_ thought Harry running a hand through his hair. _Who's to say he didn't just use it on her to make her believe he was helping her?_

Harry knew that Draco was smart, what if the blond had chosen to make her believe he was helping in order to save his own skin?

Harry closed his eyes and prayed that Hermione would be well enough to explain things soon, then he could know the truth one way or another.

* * *

The halls were eerily silent in between classes. It wasn't the first time that Fred had snuck around Hogwarts and he was happy to have his old friend with him: Harry had given Ginny the Marauder's map, and his sister had been kind enough to hand it over to him along.

Initially she had been entirely against the idea of Fred going anywhere other than straight back home. However, will a few luck-aided words about doing something with his second chance at life Fred had convinced her to let him try and be the hero once more. Ginny had even offered him her wand. Luna had stepped up at that point.

"If you don't mind me saying," she had begun in her beautiful lilt. "I think he should take someone who's less likely to get in trouble for not having their wand."

"And who do you suggest?" challenged Seamus from the sidelines. "We all need our wands. We're all on their watch list. Else we wouldn't be here."

"I don't care," Ginny had said. "It's more important that Fred be safe."

"While I think that's very sweet of you," said Luna. "You're one of the ones they watch the most. If your wand goes missing they'll suspect something is up and we want to buy your brother as much time as possible," she turned to Fred and held out her wand as an offering. "They have orders not to be too rough with me," said Luna. "Since I am still supposed to be recovering from the shock of being held hostage."

It was the second time that Luna had offered Fred her wand and both times the gesture did not go unnoticed. Wands were a part of a wizard. The wand chose the wizard after all, and to offer a wand was to offer a person a piece of yourself in a way. Luna had stood there offering it so freely even though she barely knew him.

 _I can't take your wand,_ the words had wanted so badly to come out of his mouth and yet they would not.

"Go on," she said sweetly. "I'll be fine. Madam Pomfrey will order me strict bed rest if I say that I need it."

Fred had taken the wand, thanking the younger girl, because there was nothing else he could do. He didn't want to put his sister's life in danger and… more than that, something in his gut told him that it was the right thing to do.

Now he was standing just outside the entrance of the room of hidden things. He glanced down at the map and froze. There was a pair of feet facing him on the map at the other end of the hallways. Fred whirled wand at the ready.

The new Headmaster stood looking directly at him.

* * *

Narcissa walked into Gringotts with her head held high. She pulled the air of superiority around her in a way that only someone with a lifetime of practice could manage. Everything about her screamed that she was the kind of woman who got what she wanted. She was the kind of woman who had money, and power… and she was the kind of woman who you wanted to cater to rather than piss off.

She did not bat an eyelash or spare a glance at any of the goblins scratching away with their quills and counting the gold they loved as much as her late husband.

She could feel the stares against her skin like unwanted caresses and she let them slide off her in the manner she had learned long ago.

 _Don't let the daggers people throw with their eyes ever pierce your armor,_ her mother had told her. _If they know you're weak they will use it as an excuse to find ways to cut you deeper._

The goblin at the end of the row raised his head from his work long before she reached him. Narcissa held his gaze unwavering.

"Mrs. Malfoy," the goblin greeted. "How may I be of assistance?"

"I am here to make a withdrawal from my sister's account," said Narcissa not beating around the bush.

"Is there a reason why Madam Lestrange is not making it herself?"

"That is none of your business," answered Narcissa smartly. "As I am still a joint account holder with her I am well within my rights to withdraw the entire contents of the vault without should we so desire."

The goblin almost smiled at her ruthless edge and unflinching nature. At the same time she could see that a part of him did not like being put in place by a wizard.

"That said," Narcissa raised her chin. "I am pleased to know that you care so deeply about your work and keep yourself above the politics," she stroked his ego, and then to make sure it didn't come across as schmoozing added with just a hint of superiority. "It's admirable for one of your kind."

The appreciation that had glimmered in the Goblins eye, flickered and then turned into anger at her last comment. It did however serve the purpose she intended and she was led to her sister's vault without further inquiry as to why she was making a withdrawal when Bellatrix was no longer incarcerated.

When they reached the vault Narcissa closed the door behind her and walked carefully in. She made sure not to touch anything in the room except for the goblet. While she knew the counter spell for her sisters Gemini spell, she did not know what kind of alarms and tricks Bellatrix had in place otherwise. There was still a chance that even taking the Horcrux would send some kind of a signal to her sister. All that meant for Narcissa was that she needed to act swiftly and since time was already of the essence in her mind, that was a non-issue.

Narcissa extended out her manicured hand picked up the goblet with the thick satin cloth she had brought with her, careful not to touch the piece lest the Dark Lord recognize what was going on, and wrapped it hastily tucking it into her handbag.

Her heart pounded in her chest with every step until she was safely outside Gringotts.

Narcissa then turned towards Diagon alley.

She had a favor owed that she intended to call upon.

* * *

Fred turned around in time to see Snape's eyes move from him to the sound of oncoming footsteps down the adjacent hall.

 _I'm screwed_ , thought Fred. _All this for nothing._

And then Snape did something unexpected.

He walked away.

Fred stood blinking for a moment and looked down at the map in his hands. More feet were headed his way-this time with names he did not recognize. Fred turned quickly and slipped into the room of hidden things and looked around in awe at the giant piles, upon piles that seemed to go on and on.

"Well bugger me," said Fred. "I have no idea how I'm going to find it now."

He pulled out Luna's wand.

"Accio Diadem," he called.

Nothing happened.

"Figured it wouldn't be that easy," said Fred running a hand back through his hair. He tucked Luna's wand away into his clothes.

"So you're the room of requirements closet then basically?" he spoke out loud to the room. "Any chance you could help me?"

Silence answered him.

 _Worth asking,_ thought Fred, _you never know at this school._

He let out a sigh and clapped his hands together.

"Well," he said rolling up his sleeves. "Best get down to it."

Fred walked over to the nearest pile of junk and picked up the first thing he saw. It was a small comb. He turned it over in his hands and then set it down reaching for the next item.

 _This is going to take for bloody ever_ , he thought restlessly.

 _You only have a few hours left before the Felix Felicis wears off and then you are going to be stuck behind enemy lines without any kind of protection._

 _Oh shut up_ , he told the negative voice in his head.

The sound of wings caught his attention.

"Who's there?" he asked turning.

No one answered.

Fred listened carefully and the wings fluttered again, this time he saw a streak of blue dart across only a few feet from him.

"What the hell was that?" He moved forward and all of a sudden he was face to face with a laughing Cornish pixie. Fred snapped up Luna's wand, but the little pixie was too fast. It snatched Fred's eye patch straight off his face and flew through the piles.

"Come back here!" Fred demanded and chased after the pixie

The pixie landed twenty feet up a humongous pile of items and waved Fred's eye patch around like a lasso before disappearing into the pile.

"You little brat!" growled Fred suddenly angry. He felt naked without the patch and he found himself ten feet up the pile before he even knew what he was doing.

 _You don't have time for this Fred_ , he told himself, and yet he couldn't bring himself to stop climbing upwards until he reached the spot where the Pixie had disappeared into the pile. He pressed his one good eye up to the hole. It was dark and he couldn't see anything.

"Lumos," Fred commanded and Luna's wand burst into light.

All of a sudden Fred found himself surrounded by dozens of shrieking Cornish pixies that were flying every which direction howling and covering their eyes. One slammed into his shoulder, another into his face.

Fred lost his balance and for the third time since taking the Felix he fell…this time he took half a mountain's worth of items with him.

* * *

"Hermione," Ron's voice came to her through the dark and Hermione blinked open her eyes. As before, everything was blurry and painful, but not quite so severe as when she had woken to Harry's voice.

"Ron?" She asked as the redhead came into focus.

"Hermione, thank Merlin you're alive," Ron sat back in his chair. "When Harry said you woke up I almost didn't believe it, but then I came to see you and those veins had started getting smaller."

"Water," said Hermione. Her throat was dry and her mouth felt like she had been chewing on cotton balls all night.

She was happy to know that the veins were getting smaller. A part of her had wondered if she was making any progress against the dark. Ron's words added the comfort to her heart of believing she was genuinely fighting the Darkness back and killing it in those strange dream-like moments inside her head.

The lines between reality and dream were blurring for her.

Everything inside her head felt so real.

It also felt like she had been fighting the darkness for weeks….which meant it could be since she'd seen Draco…or months. She wasn't sure how time worked while fighting off a curse in her head.

Ron handed her a glass of water and she took it in her shaking hands drinking several sips letting the cool liquid run down her parched throat. She was careful not to drink to quickly this time. Ron's steadying hand on the glass should have been a comfort, but given everything going on inside her all she wanted to do was pull away from him.

 _You shouldn't feel that way_ , she told herself. _Even if you have feeling for Draco it shouldn't change the fact that you care about Ron._

 _I do care about Ron,_ her mind answered back, _but what he did to Draco casting that curse…_ Hermione remembered the look she had seen in Ron's eyes while viewing Draco's memory of the attack.

"Am I dead?" she asked the words falling from her mouth even though it hardly seemed a logical question to ask, a part of her needed to ask.

"Nope," said Ron shaking his head. "It was pretty close though. We found you in Draco's room…" Ron swallowed for a second. On his bed…. Somehow he managed to force the curse from himself onto you."

"He didn't," she said shaking her head.

"What?" asked Ron puzzled.

 _He's not going to understand._

 _You need to make him understand. You need to protect Draco. They need to know that he isn't the villain._

"He didn't force the curse onto me," said Hermione as Harry entered the tent. "I took it from him."

Hermione's eyes flickered to Harry and she saw something strange in her best friend's eyes at her words.

"But he made you take it," said Ron, his voice intense. He wanted her to say yes. Hermione found her eyes darting back to Harry who seemed just as interested in her answer. Hermione felt a cool sweat prick over her skin.

"No," Hermione shook her head. "Where is he?" she asked looking at Harry. "Is he okay?"

"Why the hell do you care if he's okay?" Ron demanded angrily.

"Because he's my friend," said Hermione, her voice cracking. She looked back and forth between her two best friends. "I need to know if he's alright."

 _I need to know that he's okay._

"That's bullshit!" Ron jumped up and knocking the chair he had been sitting on backwards. "Friends don't torture friends!" he spat.

Hermione felt his words like a physical violence against her skin. His anger hurt. Why couldn't he just listen to what she was saying?

"Ron…" started Harry.

"She wants to know if Draco is alright," said Ron incredulously looking at Harry. "Well is he alright?" Ron's tone was petulant.

"It's okay," said Harry sensing Hermione's stress at the rising temperature of the emotional atmosphere in the room. Harry came and sat by Hermione taking her hand "We've got him locked up. He isn't going to hurt you anymore I promise."

"No," said Ron with a sneer. "She wanted to know if he was OKAY. If f he was feeling ALRIGHT," Ron's voice rose. "Apparently they are FRIENDS," Ron's tone turned nasty. "Isn't that nice Harry? Hermione has become friends with the man responsible for torturing her and keeping her hostage."

"Ron that's enough," said Harry. He sqeezed Hermione's hand trying to reassure her. It did nothing to ease the growing sense of panic in Hermione.

She needed to see Draco.

She needed to hold him and to know that everything was going to be okay.

"What were you doing when we came to rescue you? Huh?" asked Ron.

"Ron," said Harry standing and putting himself physically between his two best friends trying to calm the redhead down. "She just woke up," he said quietly putting a hand on Ron's shoulder.

"Fuck off," said Ron shoving Harry's hand aside.

"Ron please listen," Hermione started.

"You were off with him weren't you?!" Ron accused viciously. "When we came to save you. You were with him."

"Yes but-" Hermione started wanting to explain, to tell Ron that she had been trying to escape. That she was sorry, she hadn't known they were going to come for her right at that moment. She wished she had known. She had felt so horrible about it, blamed herself for so long…Her chest squeezed as she remembered Draco telling her it wasn't her fault.

She needed him now like a physical ache.

"Were you just talking or were you fucking him while my brother died trying to save you?"

The was a moment's pause while the words sunk in.

"RON!" yelled Harry breaking the silence.

Hermione's heart which had seized at Ron's accusation began pounding again in earnest. Adrenaline shot through her system.

"It wasn't like that," protested Hermione.

"It's your fault!" yelled Ron. "You're fault. If you had just been there Fred would still be alive."

Hermione felt as if Ron had just slapped her in the face. Her stomach dropped through to her toes and she turned over off the side of the bed and puked out a stream of black ooze.

"Ron get the hell out of here!" demanded Harry and he went over to Hermione. She puked again letting out a moan of agony.

"I...I'm sorry..." Ron tried to back pedal. "I'm sorry 'Mione... I didn't mean."

Hermione puked again as Harry held her hair back.

"Harry..." said Ron turning to the dark haired boy.

"You should go," said Harry. "Get your mom or one of the others, someone to help take care of her who isn't going to upset her."

Hermione felt sick, right down to her bones and it wasn't all the curse.

Ron still thought Fred was dead.

And he blamed her.

"I'm sorry-" managed Ron.

"GO!" yelled Harry.

Hermione didn't look up. She let out a sob as Harry rubbed her back.

It was too much.

It was all too much.

Hermione shivered and then the blackness took her back.

* * *

When Fred came to several moments later he shook his head and looked around to find he had landed on a couch and was covered in what appeared to be an assortment of rolls of fabric.

"Is it too much to ask NOT to fall?" he asked standing up. "I mean its nice landing without dying or being impaled on things, but this is getting redicul-" Fred stopped mid-sentence.

There on the floor a few feet away from him half out of a case, was his eye-patch tangled in the prongs of Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem.

"Well...shit," Fred let out a disbelieving chuckle and went over to the diadem. He picked it up, careful not to touch it directly, and slid it back into the case it had been hidden in. With a great feeling of satisfaction Fred put the patch back over his eye.

 _I can't wait to tell Draco about how is potion worked, I'm going to have so much fun teasing him about sending me tumbling three times._

"I can see it now," he said dusting himself off. "Draco," He rehearsed what he would say with a theatrical flare. "If you wanted me to fall for you, you shouldn't have made me FALL so many times," Fred laughed. It was going to be fun razzing the blond. He could picture the confusion that would happen first, the anger and then that almost smile when he figured out that Fred was only messing with him.

Fred couldn't help it, despite everything...he kinda liked the kid, and hearing Luna speak well of him too...well that had a little bearing on his opinion as well. Not that Fred hadn't formed his own opinion on the Slytherin boy-it was more that Luna had confirmed that he wasn't crazy for believing Draco had changed.

 _Well all you have to do is look at how he is around Hermione to KNOW that Draco Malfoy had changed._

 _A blind person could see that Draco was in love._

Fred's thoughts drifted to Hermione.

Would she ever feel the same?

It had become obvious to Fred that Hermione had grown to care for her captor. Unlike Draco, Hermione had years of bullying and ill treatment at the blonds hands that she had to move past first before she could ever really love Draco back.

 _What are you a matchmaker?_ Fred demanded of himself. _This is Draco Malfoy you're talking about and your Little Brother's almost, sort-of, girlfriend._

Fred shook his head and rolled his eyes.

THAT was going to be a whole bundle of Drama when they rescued the two of them and Fred knew that Ron was not going to take it well.

 _It doesn't matter_ , thought Fred. _You just need to focus on getting back and getting Draco and Hermione out of that manor and keeping Draco from getting the shit kicked out of him. Once the war is over then you can figure out what the hell is going to happen with the rest._

One thing Fred knew for sure was the fact that if Hermione chose Draco...He would support her...He would support them both.

A door appeared on the far wall and Fred opened it up and found himself in the main area of the room of Requirement.

 _Wouldn't it have been easier to just do this before?_ he wondered at the castle, _instead of sending me out into the hall to almost get caught by Snape?_

Fred paused thinking of the headmaster. There was no way that Snape had not seen him.

"Fred you're back," Neville's voice cut through Fred's thoughts.

"Yes," said Fred. "I am."

Several students began streaming in the room including his sister and Luna.

"Here," said Fred handing Luna back her wand. "I appreciate it but you need this now more than I do."

"Are you going back to the order then?" asked Luna.

"Yes," said Fred and he turned to his sister. "With you."

Ginny nodded furiously.

"Is the fireplace inside Gryffindor still open?"

"Yes," Ginny nodded. "Harry and I talk through it whenever its safe."

"Then we're going to use it to get out of here and back to the order. Do you know where they are right now?"

"I do."

"Good," said Fred. "Then let's go. We have friends to rescue."

* * *

Inside the tent Harry paced.

"What happened?" asked Mrs. Weasely as she lay a cool cloth against Hermione's burning forehead.

"She woke up," said Harry. "Ron was here."

"Good, it's nice that they could see each other."

Harry's face said otherwise and Mrs. Weasely frowned.

"What happened Harry," she asked folding her hands and looking at the young man she had practically adopted as her son.

"Ron told Hermione that he blames her for Fred's death."

"What!?" Mrs. Weasely balked putting a hand to her chest. "It isn't her fault!" she snapped. "I'm going to have a word with that boy."

"It's because she was asking after Draco," Harry added.

Mrs. Weasely took a moment to process that.

"What else."

"I…" Harry started and then pushed a hand back through his hair. "I don't know what the hell is going on." Harry shook his head. "The Draco in that tent is not acting like the one I knew from school."

"He's been living with the Dark Lord in his house for these past months. Its not a surprise that he's gotten darker."

"That's the thing," said Harry. "It…doesn't feel like that."

"What are you saying?"

"I don't know, "said Harry. "I think he might have used the Imperius curse on Hermione though."

Mrs. Weasely gasped and looked at Hermione. Then she let out the breath and closed her eyes.

"I shouldn't be surprised," she said shaking her head slowly. "That photo…"

"That's the thing," said Harry. "I think he used it to convince her that they were friends."

"What?"

"I think he might actually believe that they are…He's acting like he cares about her. It's all so fucked up."

Mrs. Weasely pursed her lips at the language, but said nothing.

"I don't know what to do," Harry closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. Mrs. Weasely got up and put her arms around him.

"There, there boy," she said rubbing his back. Harry leaned into the motherly gesture. "Everything is going to be alright. The import thing is that she is back safe. So let's keep her that way." She gave him a gentle pat on the back. "You stay and watch over her," Mrs. Weasely offered him a smile. "Call me if you need anything."

"Okay…" answered Harry sitting down.

He looked bone-weary and Mrs. Weasely wouldn't have been at all surprised if he fell asleep in the chair watching over Hermione. She wasn't worried though. The black veins that had covered Hermione almost head to toe had receded greatly and seemed to be concentrated mostly on one side of Hermione's body-most heavily at her forearm on the one side.

Mrs. Weasely left the tent that Hermione was in and made her way across the field to the tent that housed young Mr. Malfoy.

Mrs. Weasely let out a small gasp and covered her moth at the sight before her eyes.

The young man's blond hair was half red with dirt and blood. His face was swollen, the one eye completely puffed up. He was dirty and bloody nearly head to toe.

Her husband had told her that Ron had gone too far while interrogating their prisoner and looking at the young man in front of her she felt her chest go tight. This was too far.

She hated the Malfoys, for always looking down on her and her family and for treating them all like second class citizens. She hated them for their bigotry, their cruelty and for siding with the dark lord.

Still…This was wrong.

 _He's just a boy_ , she thought and felt the maternal instinct that was so strong and so full of love in her heart take over. A part of her resisted, thinking of Fred. She pushed that part aside. Draco Malfoy hadn't been at the mansion when her son had been killed. He had a lot to answer for, but the fact was that he was not accountable for his family's actions or the actions of the deatheaters who had committed the crime.

 _What about his actions towards Hermione,_ a part of her mind argued. What if he had used the Imperius curse on her? What else had he done?

Those thoughts caused Mrs. Weasely the briefest of pause and she closed her eyes.

 _You don't know for certain that he had anything to do with causing her harm,_ she told herself. _She is still alive and Harry said it seemed like he cared about her…_

Mrs. Weasely would let justice come and be served when Hermione woke fully and could tell them what had really happened at the mansion. Then...Then they could make sure that Draco got what he deserved-whatever that may be. In this moment though, she was not going to let the boy die from the fever beginning to take hold.

She carefully performed and cast scourgify and a few simple spells for healing on his face and body. She touched his skin gently tilting his head up to examine the eye.

He was burning up.

 _Merlin you poor thing._

Mrs. Weasely went and got some water bringing it to Draco's lips.

"Hermione?" he asked, his eyes unfocused.

"No," said Mrs. Weasely shaking her head.

"Where are you?" he asked as if not hearing her answer. His voice was distressed and he pulled at the bonds. She saw that he had rubbed his wrists raw where they held him and it pained her to think that it was hardly the worst of his injuries.

"Hush luv," she soothed him automatically.

"Why?" the word came out like a woeful moan and Mrs. Weasely pulled back he skin crawling. The sound of his voice reminded her of what it felt like to lose Fred. He sounded like he had lost someone he loved.

She cast a sleeping spell on Draco and his features gentled with sleep. She looked down at the bruised and battered young man in front of her, both understanding and hating that her Son was responsible.

 _Ronald, what are you doing?_

Mrs. Weasely took a deep breath and went outside. As she exited the tent and went around the corner came face to face with her son wearing a ridiculous eye patch.

"George will you take that off," she scoffed. "This is not the time to be playing games."

"Mum," came Ginny's voice from behind them

"Ginny. What on earth are you doing here?" asked Mrs. Weasely folding her arms over her chest. "You miss, are supposed to be in school."

"MOM!" Ginny said louder.

"What?" asked Mrs. Weasely.

Ginny reached up and took her mother's hand putting it in her son's.

"Really Ginny, you-" Mrs. Weasely froze and blinked several times. "Fred?" his name tore from her lips in an agonized sound of hope.

"Yeah," Fred answered and Mrs. Weasely threw her arms around her son's neck weeping. "Fred, Fred…Fred" she kept saying his name over and over again, holding him. Fred bent down to accommodate the hug and held his mother as she cried happy tears.

* * *

George was one of the last family members to come and find Fred in the middle of the crowd that had begun to form around them. Fred saw his twin from off in the distance and he knew the moment that George recognized him. His brother ran full tilt towards him and pushed his way through the people between throwing his arms around Fred in a forceful embrace.

"Fred."

Fred wrapped his arms around his brother and held him tight. George squeezed his ribs till they felt like they would pop but Fred didn't care and wasn't about to tell his twin to stop.

"You're alive, my god you're alive," George said into his brother's shoulder.

"I am," said Fred and he patted his brothers back, his chest squeezing. It felt beyond amazing to be reunited with his other half

George pulled back still holding on to his brother.

"I can't believe it..."

"I can't believe you couldn't just feel that I was alive," said Fred jokingly. "What happened to that twin sixth sense hmmm?"

"I..." George blinked and then smiled realizing his twin was joking. "I thought it was just me being hopeful. It didn't feel like you were dead for the first day and then I just figured I was in denial."

"I suppose I shall forgive you," said Fred and he slung his arm over his bothers shoulder.

The twins did not separate for a more than the length of time that it took Fred to hug each person and find his way back to his brother's side. George was shaken and ecstatic at the same time and Fred wasn't about to leave his other half alone. Fred could sense the nervous energy and knew that his brother needed to feel him there next to him to really know and believe that he was there and truly back from the dead.

"Fred?" came Harry's voice.

"Well if it isn't the chosen one himself!" said Fred and he welcomed Harry with open arms.

"You're alive!"

"Yes," said Fred. "People keep telling me that so it must be true."

"But we thought…..you got an axe in the face," said Harry.

"That did happen," said Fred pointing his face. "Bloody painful too."

"How did you get out? How did you survive?" asked Harry. Fred could tell that everyone in the group wanted to know the answer to that question. All eyes were on him. He had the proverbial stage and Fred lit up with the attention.

"Well now that's a story for you," said Fred with a smile. "Turns out we have someone on our side at the manner, loyal enough to risk their neck to save my hide."

"Who?" asked Harry.

Fred smiled.

"Draco Malfoy."

* * *

 **So there you go, plots all weaving together and FINALLY Fred is back with the order (actually ahead of schedule) So things are about to come to a head. Hope you are all enjoying. For those of you who have been waiting. The main Climax of this story is coming up in the next few chapters. So I hope you will stick around. I promised a little more angst as things get sorted and then I do promise...some love. I know you have been waiting for it. I know its been a journey and I'm letting you know the time is almost at hand. I hope you stick around to see it. And I hope you can find the time to show some love here and leave a review. It makes the soreness in my back and neck from staying up half the night writing tonight worth it. Cheers**


	45. Chapter 43: The Encampment

**A shout out to** : Aid4, shadowfax00, Akat x Deidara, Ashyka0o0o0, youngar994, TripleLLL, Weatherthestorm , HumbleHuffle , apls79, LovEToReadit,addictedtoloveandfiction, MsBeast, Rouch, mega700201, ALIASTESIN , Dauntless10, RubyGemGreen, Kotodashi Kyoshi, Fanficfan826 ,ChildofBrisingr , lady alegria, .babe, ElizColl, Obscure-Reference-Girl, Jen7, LillsBills , ASJS, Ayr, Qween87, CatPeach , jacpin2002, RotcehM , Hawke 1234321 , KiwiVirion **and guests** "Who", "D" and "Guest" **Thank you all for your reviews.**

 ******This is my longest chapter yet folks. Clocking in at a whopping 9k+ (NOT including the authors notes)** **it is also the longest chapter I believe I will write for a fanfiction. (But who knows for sure what the future holds) My decision to put it all in one chapter comes from the fact that this is the chapter that finishes tying together all of the plot lines that were being woven together to reach this point...and I figured you wouldn't be satisfied with my original stopping point (more on that in the end notes)**

 **I hope you enjoy it. It took literally hours upon hours to write and attempt to edit. Managing to do it by the Monday night deadline was a trial and a half, but here I am-and its still monday for me. If you do enjoy, show some love once you're done reading.**

* * *

Chapter 43: The Encampment

A shocked silence fell over the group at Fred's words. Harry felt all the blood rush to his ears in a roaring sound.

"Draco Malfoy?!" Harry choked.

"Yeah," said Fred, taking their surprise in stride and with a smile. "I know, I couldn't believe it myself, but then..." Fred shrugged. "Well he saved my life and that often changes one's opinion of a bloke."

A gnawing sensation began in Harry's stomach as all the little things began to line up in his head.

Hermione had been concerned about Draco because Draco had been looking out for her.

Draco had been broken and devastated when they told him that he couldn't see her. The sound of his wail still echoed in Harry's mind. At the time he hadn't understood why the sound had affected him so powerfully-raising the hairs on his arms. Now, looking back…If Draco really cared then…

 _When you realized he thought she was dead you just let him believe that,_ his mind chastised.

 _How the hell was I supposed to know?_ Harry thought defensively. His mind started whirling through all of the excuses to justify how he had acted. He had every reason to believe that Draco was evil after what had happened to Hermione.

 _Do you really believe that?_ A small voice in his head whispered.

"But what about the photograph?" demanded Harry, clutching onto the most prominent reason to hate Draco "Was he the one who tortured her or did he just hold her up after someone else had their turn?"

A murmur went through the crowd.

Not everyone knew about the photograph and so Harry's question and the implied story behind it changed the celebratory atmosphere like a swift wind.

Fred's face clouded over.

"I don't think she would want this conversation made public," said Fred moving away from his brother and leaning in towards Harry. "You can ask her all the questions yourself once we go and rescue them both," he stepped back to address the group. "Draco made a plan which he told me when he helped me escape. We have to go Friday at eight thirty. It's when the guards change-"

"Ummm, Fred," said George.

"What?" asked Fred his eyebrows knitting together at the interruption.

Harry felt his stomach churn.

 _Fred doesn't know._

"There are some things that you should know which kind of affect that plan," said George and the group shifted.

"Why are you being so cryptic?" asked Ginny frowning at her brother. "What's going on?"

"Okay," said Fred squaring his shoulders. "Whatever it is we will work it out," a muscle twitched in his jaw and Harry felt as if nothing would sway Fred from his course. "We have to save them thought so we have to figure out a way to go and-"

"We won't be going," came Ron's voice and Harry turned to see Ron standing with his arms crossed a few feet back from everyone else.

Instead of running to his brother Ron looked like he was ready to fight him.

"We have to," said Fred. "We need to save them both before-"

"Who are you?" demanded Ron.

"It's Fred," said Ginny.

"Fred is dead," snapped Ron. "Clearly whoever this is," he gestured flippantly. "Is using Polyjuice potion which is well and truly fucked up considering they are impersonating a dead person."

There was a brief moment of silence while the accusation sunk in.

Harry looked Fred over briefly in that time. The voice was right…and…it seemed like Fred.

Was he wrong?

"It's Fred," said George, breaking that silence. "I am sure of it."

"So am I," added Ginny.

Harry felt a mild rush of relief. If George and Ginny both believed and were sure there was no reason to doubt it.

"Yeah?" said Ron. "How can you be sure?" He jutted his chin out towards Fred. "The Fred I know went into the mansion trying to save Hermione. He knew as well as we all did that Draco is the enemy."

"Was the enemy," corrected Fred firmly enough that Harry felt his stomach begin to roll again. When all this was done he was going to ask Mrs. Weasely where the ginger tea was.

"Bullshit," said Ron. "After what he did to Hermione he will always be my enemy, and if you care about her at all you would feel the same."

"Ron," started Harry, not wanting to continue this conversation in public a moment longer. While he trusted everyone in the order-Fred was right talking about what Hermione had been through in front of everyone was inappropriate especially when they didn't know for certain what exactly had happened….especially since some things that might have happened were the kind of things that people didn't always want to talk about outright and in Harry's mind it should always be up to the person to choose when and who they told about…things.

"Oh so anyone who doesn't feel the same as you or agree with you is automatically the enemy then?" said Fred and Harry felt the words like a brick on his chest.

"Yes," answered Ron.

"That's a load of crap, Percy and us don't see eye to eye but he's still our brother," said Fred. "People are allowed to disagree with one another and still be civil."

"Yeah, well this isn't a disagreement on a favourite Quidditch player," said Ron

Harry watched as Ron shifted from one foot to the other. The comment about Percy was a little close to home to come from someone who was just impersonating Fred.

Ron paused.

"It really is him," said George, clearly seeing that his youngest brother was on the precipice of believing.

There was a hushed silence and the group seemed to be collectively holding their breaths to see which way Ron would go.

"Fred?" asked Ron, his voice cracking a little.

"Yeah," Fred's smile seemed slightly forced.

Ron stepped forward and threw his arms around his brother and they hugged. The tension in the group eased almost immediately and Harry felt his own shoulders drop.

"Why don't we go inside," suggested Harry.

"Good idea," said Ginny and she made her way over to Harry slipping her hand in his. She gave him a quick kiss. "It's good to see you again," she whispered softly in his ear.

"It's good to see you too," It really was. Harry had missed her tremendously in their time apart. True they had been able to speak through the fireplace, but it wasn't the same.

It felt good to hold her hand.

* * *

Hermione found herself at the mouth of cave. Her one arm was tied tight to her chest in bandages and the hem of her medieval dress was shredded from walking. She didn't know how long she had been walking only that she had make it to the cave.

She stood looking at the black abyss of the cave before her. She had never been afraid of the dark before taking the curse from Draco, but now looking into the black she felt a tremor run down her spine.

Fire blew outwards and she stepped backward. The blast went wide to the side, clearly designed as a warning instead of an attack.

 _Draco…_

She picked up a burning branch the dragon had lit with its breath and stepped into the cave. The light from her makeshift torch glistened off of the great white Dragon in front of her. He watched her with wary familiar eyes.

"Draco," she said his name out loud and he roared. The force of the sound blowing her hair backwards and blowing out the torch in her hand.

Hermione found herself in the dark again.

"Draco," she called out for him again, this time her voice full of fear.

"I'm here," he answered and suddenly very human arms were around her pulling her in close. "I'm here," he said stroking her hair. She could not see him, but she could feel him, his heart beating next to hers.

"Why did you go?" she asked.

"I hurt you, I had to go."

"I forgive you," she said. "I know you didn't mean it. Please stay with me."

"I will."

"Promise me."

"I promise."

Their lips met and Hermione hated that it was a dream and she couldn't feel them in the way she wanted to. She pressed herself closer to him trying to feel him how she needed to.

All at once were voices at the edge of the cave.

Angry voices.

"They've come for you!" she said. "You have to run."

"Not without you."

"But you must," she pleaded.

"I would rather die than live without you," he said and she knew he meant it.

Suddenly they were surrounded by villagers. Ron was at the head of them. They grasped hold of Draco by the arms and put shackles on him. Draco tried to push them off. Ron hit him.

"NO!" yelled Hermione and a backhand sent her out of the cave onto the grass.

Harry stood there looking in.

"You have to help him," she pleaded grabbing hold of Harry's pant leg with her one good arm. "Please."

"He's a dragon, he's evil."

"He's not evil. Don't you see, he helped you defeat the black Dragon!" Hermione looked down at her feet as she felt a cold slime creeping there. The black was rising up out of the grass to pull her down.

"Harry please!" she pleaded. Harry looked away as the black consumed her.

* * *

The end of the dream woke Hermione and she found herself alone in the tent, which surprised her considering each time she had opened her eyes there had been someone she cared about next to her. First Harry, then Ron...Hermione froze as Ron's words came back to her.

 _"It's your fault he's dead."_

She sat up slowly, he limbs slightly shaky.

How could he have said something like that? Her chest hurt even thinking about it.

Ron blamed her for Fred being dead.

Only Fred wasn't dead.

 _He doesn't know that_ , she reminded herself.

 _Which makes it all the worse, because it meant he really believes it's your fault._

Hermione wrapped her arms around her stomach and then as a tremor flickered through her she reached down picked up the waste basket, and puked black into it. It tasted horrible and she hated it. At the same time It made her feel better to get it out of her system.

She could hear a crowd outside her tent and tried to stand to go out and see what was going on. Her legs wobbled beneath her and she sat back down on the bed.

Mrs. Weasely had tried to comfort her after what Ron had said.

" _He's upset, he doesn't mean it,"_ she had said.

Hermione knew better; she had seen the look on Ron's face. Ron blamed her for his brothers death. She wondered if that was why he had been the villain in her dream-the one leading the villagers to destroy the Dragon Draco.

 _Draco didn't blame you,_ her mind thought.

 _Draco, doesn't have a brother who he thinks is dead,_ she shot back. She didn't want to blame Ron. She didn't want to hate Ron for what he had done to Draco and for thinking so poorly of her...at the same time his words and actions had effectively killed the small flame that she had been holding on to even as she had fallen for Draco.

A part of her had imagined that Ron would be here and that once everything was all over and settled Draco would go back to his world and she to hers.

 _Draco would never leave you,_ her mind argued.

She thought back to the last moments she had been with him, inside his mind-holding him as the black killed everything inside.

 _"I love you, I love you more than I have ever loved anything or anyone in my life…you to remember that you redeemed a soul that was lost and you pulled love out of someone who was never capable of it before. YOU ARE my world Hermione Granger. You always will be."_

"Where are you now?" Hermione asked out loud. Her bottom lip trembled slightly.

She had taken the curse but...what if she had been too late?

What if it had done so much damage that he had died anyways?

Hermione remembered the hissing of the snake from his dark mark as it seemed to die. Maybe she had acted too late.

Maybe she hadn't got it all?

Harry hadn't said he was dead though, just that she was safe from him.

 _That could mean that he's dead,_ she told herself.

"You can't think that," she said out loud and then she paused.

"Idiot," she said out loud and rolled her eyes at herself. She looked for the wand that she had been using. It was nowhere to be found.

 _They took your wand..._

 _It wasn't your wand,_ she reminded herself, _not really._

Still, they had left her alone in the tent with no means of protection.

Hermione suddenly felt vulnerable in a way that she hadn't since early on in her time at the manor.

 _You can still try to reach out to him..._ she thought.

At the very least it couldn't hurt could it?

Hermione lay back down on the bed. She took several deep breaths and closed her eyes. She focused with all of her mind on the bind and Draco. A tiny silver thread appeared in her mind and she grabbed hold of it feeling it pulse in her hands. She followed the thread.

When the image came to her she wasn't sure if she had just fallen asleep, if she was imagining things or if she had made her way into Draco's mind without the aid of a wand.

Draco was sitting in hut in the oasis on the big black couch he had there. He was staring into the fire with a sad scowl on his face and a drink in his hand.

Without thinking Hermione walked over and sat down next to him. Draco jumped slightly, startled and then his expression softened and set aside the drink.

"What are you doing here?" he asked welcoming her into his arms.

Hermione leaned into him. This felt so much more real than the dream she had just woken from.

"I came to be with you," she answered. "I wanted to know you were okay."

"I am with you," he said. "It's the only time I feel okay," he looked down at her and there was a sadness in his eyes. She could feel the sorrow in him, coming in waves.

"Draco, what's wrong?"

"Don't worry about it now," he said and kissed her forehead gently. She felt the brush of his lips against her skin like an electric hold. "Just stay with me here," he said as he he squeezed her gently.

Hermione let herself ease into his body, relaxing into the firmness of his torso. She listen to his heartbeat, so strong and steady. She liked the sound of it-it calmed her.

"I thought about what you said," said Draco, rubbing his cheek against the top of her head lightly as he readjusted his hold on her. "I'll do it. I promise..."

Hermione pulled back to look at his face, confused about what he was saying.

"I promise," he said looking in her eyes with that same sadness, but also with a soft undercurrent of determination. "I'll make you proud."

"Draco-" she started and then she was torn away from him by someone yelling outside her tent.

Disappointed, Hermione got up. Her legs left a little stronger than when she had woken just a few minutes ago. She followed the voices coming to stand just outside of a tent. She meant to go in but the words she heard stopped her in place.

"We have to go save Hermione and Draco," it was Fred's voice.

 _How long have I been unconscious_? She wondered.

"No we don't," Ron's voice shot back.

"You don't have to like him, but we need to go," said Fred.

"We already saved her," snapped Ron.

There was a pause.

"When?" asked Fred.

"Yesterday morning," answered Harry's voice.

 _That tells me how long I've been out for them_ , she thought and reached for the tent flap and peeking inside. The group was facing entirely away from her. She knew she was eves dropping and that she should make herself known, but her body wouldn't move.

"Well, good," said Fred. "I'm glad you got her, but you don't understand," protested Fred. "There is this bind that you-know-who put on them." Fred explained. "He can torture Draco until he leads the Death eaters right to him."

Hermione watched Harry and Remus shared a strange look.

"That won't be a problem either," said Ron.

"It is a problem," insisted Fred.

"It's okay Freddie," said George.

"No its not," said Fred clearly starting to loose his temper. Hermione felt a flare of affection for how much Fred cared about Draco. It made her happy to know she wasn't alone.

"We have him," said Harry.

Hermione felt a flood of relief rush through her.

Draco was here.

Draco was alive.

Maybe what she had just felt and seen when she had tried to reach out to him had been more than a dream, maybe she had been with him for real.

 _Or maybe that is just wishful thinking._

"What?" asked Fred.

"We have Draco too," said George.

"Oh," said Fred and Hermione saw his shoulders relax. "Well that's a relief," he smiled. "Where are they?"

"Hermione is in the sleeping area," said Harry. "She's still resting, she just woke up yesterday."

"Woke up?" asked Ginny and Fred almost at the same time.

"Yeah," said Ron his tone turning venomous once more. "You're FRIEND and Ally Draco pushed a dark curse off onto her."

"I don't think..." started Harry, and then he rubbed his face.

"Draco wouldn't do that," interjected Fred.

"Oh?" asked Ron raising an eyebrow "And how do you know that?"

"Because he-" Fred paused and Hermione felt him debating what to say.

"Because he what?" demanded Ron harshly. "Did he tell you he was working with the good guys now?" asked Ron in a fake voice. "He forced Hermione to take the curse."

Hermione couldn't stand it one minute longer. She marched into the room

"Ronald Weasely," Hermione said his name angrily "You know that's not true."

"Yes it is!" said Ron. "That curse was meant for him not you."

"I could not just stand by and let him die!" she protested.

"What the hell are you all talking about?" asked Fred. "What curse? What the bloody hell is going on?"

"I took the curse to save his life," explained Hermione. "The curse that Ron," she pointed. "Cast to kill him."

"You cast a curse to try and kill Draco?" asked Fred frowning.

"It only kills DEATHEATERS," said Ron defensively. "Which everyone here seems to keep forgetting. Draco Malfoy is a deatheater. He is the worst kind of scum. He tortured and hurt Hermione he deserves to be punished."

A cold feeling washed over Hermione's skin.

"Where is Draco?" she demanded. "What have you done to him?"

"Can we all calm down for a minute," said Harry.

"No!" she protested. "Not until I get to see Draco."

"You haven't let her see him?" asked Fred.

"No," said Harry.

"It's clear she's been imperius-ed," Said Ron.

"I HAVEN'T BEEN BLOODY IMPERIUS-ED!" yelled Hermione and then the world started to spin. She heard people call her name, and then there was nothing.

* * *

When Hermione woke up she was laying back in bed once more.

She blinked.

 _Did I faint?_ Hermione balked. She was not a fainter.

"Welcome back luv," said Mrs. Weasely. "Now, drink this and take it easy," she handed Hermione a glass of water. Hermione drank it and looked around the room.

Fred was there, right beside her, George too. Harry, Ginny, Ron and Reamus. The other members of the order were clearly elsewhere.

"Where is Draco?" asked Hermione.

"And you wonder why we think you've been Imperius-ed," said Ron "With you're bloody obsession with that-"

"Shut up Ronald," snapped Fred.

"I don't know why you're taking his side," said Ron

"Because he saved my bloody life!" said Fred and everyone went quiet at Fred's loud profession.

Fred took a deep breath and his lips went into a thin line before he spoke.

"Draco Malfoy found me laying on the ground in a coma and took me and hid me from the rest of the death eaters. He nursed me back to health and brought Hermione to me."

"How do you know it wasn't part of some evil plan?" asked Harry.

"Harry!" said Hermione.

"It's a fair question," said George.

"It is a fair question," said Fred nodding in agreement with his twin. He looked at Hermione reassuringly. "But I know that isn't it."

"And how do you know?" asked Ron crossing his arms over his chest. "You've said a few times that you 'know' Ron made air quotes. "That Draco is on our side, how the hell do you know? What proof do you have?"

"You mean other than him saving Fred's life," said Ginny.

Fred looked to Hermione and swallowed.

Hermione knew what he was going to say before he said it and she opened her mouth to protest.

"Don't," she said.

"Because he gave me a vial of Felix Felisis," said Fred.

"That could have been a calculated risk," said Harry.

Fred looked to Hermione.

"And because…" he started.

Hermione looked away with the barest of nods knowing that the truth had to come out to make them believe

"Because he's in love with Hermione."

There was a moment's pause before Ron exploded out of his chair.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?" he raged.

"Sit down Ron," said Mrs. Weasely.

"NO!" Ron's face turned red. "And you?" he turned his head towards Hermione. "ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH HIM?!"

"I..." Hermione opened her mouth but no words came out.

"That's why you took the curse from him! You are, you're fucking are! Hermione how could you?!" asked Ron and Hermione could see the anger and hurt in him. "It's his fault!" said Ron. "He [put a spell on her!"

"He didn't make me care for him with magic. His actions did that. I owe him my life," said Hermione. "You have no idea what he did to protect me," she looked away from Ron.

"Ron-" started Fred.

"You stay out of this," said Ron shaking his head.

"No," said Fred flatly. "You can hate him all you like, he's been a prick, but-"

"No but's," said Ron. "I don't want to hear about it. You both have clearly gone mental. He's fucked with your heads. Both of you."

Hermione trembled at his words and how much he truly believed what he was saying.

Ron stormed out.

Hermione turned to Fred, her trembling gave way to tears and Fred moved closer to her seeing her distress.

She wrapped her arms around him and Fred patted her head gently and rubbed her back.

"Shhhhh," he crooned. "Its going to be okay."

"Why won't anyone believe us?" she asked as if it were just the two of them in the room.

"It's a stretch Hermione," said Remus. "We have all know Draco Malfoy...the boy is not exactly known for his charity."

 _No you don't,_ she thought, none of you know him. _Not really, not like I do._

Hermione looked around the room and saw that everyone seemed to agree with Remus words. Everyone except Harry who had odd look on his face.

"Harry, you remember...you saw the astronomy tower...he didn't kill Dumbledore he lowered his wand..." Hermione pulled back from Fred and face Harry directly. "You have to tell them, you have to believe me. If you do then so will everyone else."

"I don't know what to think, this is all a bit much all at once Hermione," Harry turned to Fred. "I'm really glad you're alive," he said and Hermione felt her hopes fall to the ground. Harry took a breath and looked back at her before getting up to leave. "I need to think for a little while."

* * *

Draco woke from the dream feeling miles better than when he had passed out.

Before the dream he had felt feverish, after he felt stronger somehow.

He had been floating in the black and then found himself in his oasis staring at the fire, thinking of her and drinking. It had startled him at first, when she had come to him. The surprise gave way to a glimmer of joy.

I can't have her here, he thought to himself, but when I dream…when I dream she is there. He silently prayed that she would haunt his dreams for the rest of his life. He knew it would mean that he would never be able to move on and be with someone else- Honestly…he didn't care. He would rather live with memories and dreams of her than with someone else and if that made him fucked up, so be it.

 _She would want you to live…_

 _She wants me to live for her, not live happy ever after,_ he told himself. _I promised I would live for her, and that is what I am going to do._

 _You know she would want you to be happy…_

 _I'll never be happy without her._

His mind went back to the dream.

She had felt so real.

His heart had ached when he wrapped his arms around her.

He wanted to hold her forever, but she had vanished after he had told her he promised to live for her as she had asked.

He felt stronger now. Determined inside and out.

He would find a way out of here, find a way to escape Ron and his torture and he would help the Order whether they wanted it or not because that's what Hermione would want. If she were still alive she would be spending her time defeating the dark Lord and his plan and saving Harry and her friends. That's what Hermione would do, so now...now he would do it for her because she couldn't.

 _I will make you proud Hermione,_ he thought again, _I hope you're up there watching._

Draco closed his eyes remembering the feel of her next to him on the couch and holding on to it tightly. He could almost feel her hair against his cheek.

The sound of the tent opening had Draco raising his head to look and see who had come. He knew something was different the moment that Ron entered the tent. Ron's face was red and his eyes had murderous intent. It was beyond anger.

"Did you screw her?" demanded Ron.

"What?" Draco blinked, unsure if he had heard Ron correctly. Was he still delirious?

"Did you fuck my girlfriend?" Ron asked again. The crude words had Draco setting his jaw in a hard line. After everything that question cut the most-the implication that he would have forced Hermione or that he would have slept with her without it meaning anything made Draco's teeth grind.

Hermione was not one of the many girls he had slept with.

She was the only girl…woman he had ever loved and he had done nothing more than kiss her.

 _You should have treated those girls better, they all wanted to be what Hermione was to you. They wanted your love,_ _they wanted your heart._

 _My heart wasn't beating until her._

"No," said Draco, and then his temper got the better of him for a moment and he found himself making a nasty comment "I wasn't aware that you two had been official."

The punch hit him and he mildly felt he deserved that one, given the circumstances.

"We weren't, but we were going to be and you fucked it all up."

"I'm sorry," the words slipped out of Draco's mouth without him even thinking.

"What did you just say?" demanded Ron grabbing hold of Draco's shirt. He got close enough that Draco could smell his breath. Draco turned his head away.

"I said..." Draco paused. He was sorry for a lot of things but not for getting in the way of Hermione and Ron's romance. He was sorry Hermione wasn't happy and healthy and breathing…but he wasn't sorry she wasn't with the prick in front of him. "You know what..." Draco looked back at Ron. "I'm not sorry," said Draco firmly. "I'm sorry she's gone but I'm not sorry that she didn't end up with you." He meant his next words with every fibre of his being "She deserved better."

 _She deserved better than me too,_ he added mentally.

He was prepared for the next punch.

Being prepared didn't lessen the pain in the slightest. The blow landed across the nose and Draco felt the bone break and blood spurted into his mouth and down his face.

Draco's eyes rolled from the pain and from the lack of food and water, on top of everything else.

"You think she would have chosen you? She never would have been with you if you hadn't fucking forced her. You're slime. You're a worthless fucking ferret!" He punched again.

Draco coughed as he choked on his own blood.

 _Worthless…_ the word bounced around inside Draco's head. His fathers cane, the belt, his pain, the dark Lord everything churned inside him and then he saw her face and it all stopped.

" _Thank you for your love Draco…It's the greatest gift I have ever been given"_

Her last words to him.

She had brought out the love.

She had made him better.

He had been worthless.

"Yeah," said Draco. "I was..."

"You are," Ron hit Draco again and the chair went toppling over to the side. Draco landed with a thud and he felt his arm snap in the fall. He let out a yell. He shook.

 _She died for you,_ he thought.

 _She chose you._

 _I didn't want her too,_ he protested.

 _But she did,_ his mind answered back.

 _Which means...she thought you were worth it..._

 _She made you into something worthy._

"You're nothing," said Ron

"No," said Draco spitting up blood. "I'm not nothing," he coughed.

There was one thing Draco knew he was:

One thing that mattered beyond all else.

It didn't change just because she was gone.

It would never change.

No one could ever, would ever, take it from him.

"I am something ..." said Draco closing his eyes. "I'm hers."

* * *

Ron drew his wand at Draco's words and pointed it at the blond boy in the dirt at his feet.

Draco's body went completely lax as his eyes closed. Ron toed him with his boot and realized that the blond was unconscious.

Ron felt himself tremble. He wanted to Hex Draco.

He wanted to kill Draco.

 _What if he really did help her?_ The thought popped into Ron's head staying his hand from the attack.

Ron felt his blood pounding in his temples.

Either Draco was the evil he thought, had hurt, tortured and likely Raped Hermione and therefore deserved everything he had done...

Or...

Maybe...

 _No,_ he shook his head.

Even if he hadn't taken advantage of her it was clear he was obsessed with Hermione and had messed with her mind.

"I hate you," said Ron looking down. "I hope you rot." He sneered and left the tent.

Ron looked towards the tent where Hermione was. A part of him wanted to go and apologize to her for yelling at her. It wasn't her fault that she was under the influence of magic. When she got over the spell she would probably apologize to him for acting the way she had. Ron decided he would wait till then to apologize. It would make her feel better…less guilty about all of this if he said he was sorry then too.

What about what you said about Fred? His mind questioned.

Ron kicked at the dirt and turned away from her tent walking out towards the tree line.

 _It's not my fault,_ he thought. _I didn't know Fred was alive._

 _You still shouldn't have said that to her….She was probably under his spell by then anyways._

Ron scowled. He wanted to owl Lavender and tell her all about this. She would understand. She was a good listener.

But he shouldn't talk to her about Hermione, she might get upset… Ron rubbed his face and kept walking. He crossed over the invisible barrier the order had set up, feeling the need to escape. He looked up at the stars for a moment and looked back. The space behind him looked like an empty field; all of their tents hidden by magic.

A snapping twig caught his attention and Ron turned towards the sound.

From the shadows a figure appeared.

Ron drew his wand quickly and was startled when it was flicked away immediately with a perfectly cast Expelliarmus.

He opened his mouth to yell.

"Silencio," the shadow said moving forward.

Ron turned to run and a stupefy slammed into his back sending him sprawling.

From the flat of his back Ron looked up at Narcissa Malfoy.

 _I knew it was a trap. I knew Draco couldn't be good_ , thought Ron.

"I am not here to fight," she said looking down at him. "But I will if I must. I am here for my son."

* * *

Fred sent the rest of the group away with Harry after Harry said he needed some time. The answer had clearly hurt Hermione deeper than she was letting on because she didn't want to talk with anyone, even Ginny, while at the same time she wouldn't let go of Fred's arm.

Fred held her for a while, not sure exactly what to do.

All of a sudden she straightened violently then clutched at her chest.

"Draco is in danger, I can feel it. Fred….he's hurting him." Hermione looked like she wanted to be sick and get up and run to Draco.

She stood, pulling away from Fred and he watched her eyes roll halfway backwards. He caught her before she fully fell. She clung to him as she blinked trying to re-focus.

"I'll go," said Fred adjusting his hold on her. He was worried she would try and fight him and he would lose grip only to have her fall over. "You can't."

"I need to," Hermione protested.

"You don't even have a wand," said Fred pointedly. "And you can barely stand. I promised him I wouldn't let anyone torture him that night. That promise still stands."

"You don't have one either. I need to see him," said Hermione, her voice trembling.

Fred nodded. He still couldn't believe that the group hadn't at least let the two see one another. At the same time he understood them being cautious. After all, if he hadn't seen it first hand he might be skeptical of 'Good Draco' himself.

"I know," he said and tried to get her to listen. "I'm also not recovering from a curse" He helped her back into bed. "Stay here," he said.

"I…"

"Promise me you'll stay here," said Fred seriously looking Hermione in the eye. "And I promise I'll help him."

Fred watched the indecision cross Hermione's face and then another tremor rippled through her and she bent over dry heaving.

"Go!" she insisted.

"Promise me."

"I promise, now go help him please."

Fred ran out of the tent and realized he had no idea where they were keeping Draco. Quickly in his head he eliminated the dining tent, the tent where his parents were sleeping, Tonks and Lupins tent. That only left two. The first appeared to be a medical bay. In the second he found Draco laying on the ground battered and bloody.

Pain gripped Fred's chest at the sight and Fred dropped down beside Draco..

"Draco, mate…" He lifted the younger boy's head gently.

"Fred?" Draco came too and looked up at Fred through the blood and dirt. A small smile flickered across his lips and Fred watched him try to hide it. "I'm glad you made it."

"Thanks," said Fred momentarily taken aback by Draco's comment.

Here the guy was laying on the floor bleeding, saying he was thankful Fred was okay.

"We're going to have a funny conversation about your Felix Felicis and how much it helped, one of these times when you aren't laying on the floor bleeding." Fred righted the chair. "Who did this to you?"

Draco looked Fred in the eye and said nothing. His expression confirmed what Hermione had said.

"Ron," said Fred, his brother's name tasting sour in his mouth.

"He blames me," said Draco.

"Yeah well, he doesn't have the whole story," said Fred wiping some of the grime of Draco's face gently with his shirt sleeve.

"It doesn't matter," said Draco his head lolling.

"It does," said Fred. "I promised I wouldn't stand by and let them torture you. I meant it."

Draco looked up at Fred and gave a flicker of a smile, one he didn't try to hide, before his eyes rolled back in his head and he passed out cold.

"Shit," said Fred wishing he had a wand. "I'm gunna get you help," said Fred knowing Draco couldn't hear it and at the same time needing to say it out loud.

Reluctantly Fred left Draco where he was and headed back to the medical tent to try and find supplies and someone with a wand who would be willing to help.

* * *

Narcissa had spent hours convincing her contact that it would be in his best interest to give up the order's whereabouts.

Since Narcissa was a woman of her word when she had sworn it on her wand that she would not tell the Dark Lord or any of his minions where the order was he had finally given up the location. It had taken her word that she was only looking for her son to get her contact to give up the information she needed.

Once she knew where to look it was not hard to find.

The order had placed magic around the clearing to keep others away and hide them. Narcissa had sought out that magic specifically and when she found it, it was only a matter of time before one of them crossed over the line. She had waited and now one had given her the chance she needed.

"You are going to take me back in," she said "And you are going to give me my son."

The shook his head and Narcissa picked him up with a spell and released the silencio.

"Fuck you," he said instead of calling out.

"I am giving you the chance to be the hero," said Narcissa.

"By giving up a prisoner and giving back a deatheater to the cause. Ha," said Ron. "I'm not stupid."

 _Well that's debatable_ , thought Narcissa and then paused as recognition dawned.

This was the boy who had been with Granger and Potter at the manor.

This was the boy who had cursed her son with Deatheaters Bane.

Fury bloomed inside Narcissa's chest and she resisted the urge to turn her wand on him and make him pay for ever second her boy had hurt at his hands.

 _If you kill him you may never get Draco back._

Narcissa bit back the heat in her tongue and the Hexes that itched to escape.

"What you will get in return is worth more than any ransom," said Narcissa.

Ron sneered

"I don't want your money."

"I'm not offering money," said Narcissa. "I'm offering you a piece of the puzzle you need to defeat the dark Lord."

"And what is that?" demanded Ron. Narcissa felt a strong urge to make Ron eat his own tongue

 _You need him…you need them to get to Draco_ , she reminded herself.

She removed the spells from Ron and he dropped back to the ground and dusted himself off. He extended his hand clearly wanting his wand back. Narcissa wasn't about to give him back his weapon until Draco was safe and sound in her arms.

"You give me my son and I will give you the Horcrux my sister was keeping at Gringotts."

Narcissa saw the recognition in the boy's face. He clearly knew what she was talking about.

"How do I know it's real?" Ron asked.

"Get the boy if you must. I am sure Mr. Potter will be able to validate its authenticity."

"I don't trust you," the redhead said.

"You don't need to trust me," said Narcissa. "You just need to give me what I want in order to get what you need," she paused and considered her words before she spoke.

Draco had told her how Ron had turned on Harry before the tri-wizard tournament. Her son had commented how stupid the redhead was thinking that he could ever be in the limelight with Potter for his best friend. The memory of those words fueled Narcissa's next play.

"Of course…if you get Mr. Potter to validate it before-hand all the credit for the exchange will go to him." Narcissa cocked her head to the side. "Wouldn't you like to be the hero for at least a day?"

The boy sneered and then shifted looking away. She saw him debate and she smiled inwardly when he chose.

"Follow me," he said and turned back to the camp.

Narcissa followed Ron Weasely back into the camp keeping her wand at the ready and her eyes peeled for others. She could hear conversation off in the distance while the tent they were moving towards was silent.

As soon as she stepped inside she gasped.

Draco was sitting in a chair, his head back, unconscious.

Narcissa threw herself down on the floor next to her son, kneeling so that she could press her head to his chest and hear the reassuring thump of his heartbeat.

He was unresponsive and bloody, but the black veins were gone.

"What have you done to him?" she demanded looking back. Ron had a puzzled look on his face, with his eyes focused on the chair Draco was sitting in. His eyes shifted back to her and his expression shifted to a scowl at her words.

"Nothing he didn't deserve," he answered.

Narcissa lashed out with her wand, unable to contain her wrath for one second longer.

Ron went flying backwards into one of the beams holding the tent up. The fact that it was magic was the only thing that kept it from uprooting.

"You little bastard!" she growled. "You dare touch my son after cursing him!"

The woman who was known for her near perfect control lost it.

Narcissa had always prided herself on being capable-level headed, even tempered. She handled things with grace. Her sister was the wild, reckless one, not her.

She felt wild now.

She wanted to tear Ron apart with her bare hands.

"How did you know about the cruse?" asked Ron clutching at his chest.

"Because I sat at his bedside doing everything in my power to save my only son from a curse that is supposed to be wiped from history," said Narcissa stalking forward. "Who taught you it?" she demanded.

"No one," he answered.

"Liar!" she lashed out and a bright red stripe of blood bloomed across Ron's chest. She lashed out again cutting him a second time and then she was close enough to touch him and she raked her nails across his face in a vicious swipe.

Ron screamed and fell to his knees.

His scream brought Narcissa back to the reality of the situation.

 _Get a hold of yourself_ , she ordered.

 _They will have heard him scream._

"I should kill you," she sneered, "But I said I wasn't here for a fight and that's what I would have on my hands if they found you dead." She turned away and in a quick rush she undid the bonds on Draco and lifted him with a spell. "They would hunt me down for killing you, and I need to take my son and hide."

She reached into her bag and tossed the Horcrux on the ground at Ron's feet.

"I am a woman of my word," she said. "So listen carefully Ronald Weasely. If you come near my son again." She paused for emphasis and to make sure he was listening. "I will kill you."

She held up his wand in front of her face.

"You'll never harm another soul with this," she said and snapped it in half throwing it at his feet next to the goblet and then she dissaperted taking her son with her.

* * *

Harry felt odd being the one who had to leave when he had been friends with Hermione the longest of everyone. True she had always gotten along with Fred and George, but she had never claimed to have them as confidant. Yet here he was in another tent while Fred comforted her.

Harry felt a small stammer of Jealousy in his chest and batted it away fiercely. She needed to recover and if Harry had to give her space for that to happen so be it.

 _I only said I needed time…_ he thought defensively.

 _Why is she fine with Fred if she needs space? His_ mind argued.

Harry knew the answer: It was that Fred believed what she was saying. Fred believed whole heartedly that Draco had saved his life and that everything that Draco had done to Hermione was to protect her.

 _Maybe it's true…_ thought Harry.

 _Or maybe he pulled the wool over both their eyes._

Harry rubbed his eyes tiredly and then the sound of Ron's screams cut through his thoughts.

Harry, George and Remus all ran towards the sound without hesitation. When they rushed into the tent Harry saw two things:

The first was that Draco was gone.

The second was that Ron was covered in blood. His cheek looked like it had been clawed by a wild animal.

"What happened?" asked Harry and then his eyes landed at the goblet at Ron's feet and he grabbed his forehead as the power from the Horcrux slammed into him. He stumbled back several feet.

"What's wrong?" asked George.

"It's a Horcrux," said Harry hissing in pain.

Images of Voldemort slammed into him

 _The dark Lord was yelling at Bellatrix who was quivering on the floor._

" _HOW!" he demanded "HOW DID SHE TAKE IT. HOW DID SHE KNOW?"_

" _It was when I was in Azkaban my lord," she said holding her hands up in defence. "While you were still gone. I needed someone to deal with my vault."_

" _I WAS NEVER GONE!" he yelled and thrashed around the room. "WHERE IS SHE?"_

" _I don't know my Lord."_

" _YOUR SISTER BETRAYED ME!"_

Suddenly Harry was back in the tent on his knees. Remus had a hand on his back steadying him.

"Narcissa," Harry struggled for air. "Narcissa was here."

"She wanted to trade," said Ron filling in the blanks. "The Horcrux for him."

"You're lucky you're still alive," snapped Harry "After what you did to her son."

"He deserved it" protested Ron.

"So you keep saying," said Harry.

"She's his mother," said Lupin. "She doesn't care what he deserved only that you hurt her baby. Harry is right. You're lucky she didn't kill you. Narcissa is a cold, pure-blooded bitch but she isn't a heartless one. She loves Draco more than anything else in the whole world"

It jarred Harry to hear Professor Lupin speak so harshly about Narcissa and then he remembered that the woman Remus loved was technically Draco's cousin. Harry doubted very much that Narcissa approved of their match and wondered just how well Remus knew her.

"You call this lucky?" demanded Ron pointing to his face.

"It will heal," said George. "Probably won't even leave a scar."

"Is everything alright in here?" asked Tonks coming into the room a moment later.

"Everything is fine," said Lupin. "It seemed that Narcissa came on a one woman rescue mission. We should get moving, she will likely tell you-know-who where we are we havne't got much time."

"I don't think she will," said Harry.

"What?" asked Lupin.

"She stole the Horcrux from Belletrix Lestrange volt at Gringotts. HE is furious."

"What else did Narcissa say?" asked Lupin turning towards Ron.

"What the hell does it matter she's clearly crazy," said Ron holding the cold compress George had cast up to his cheek.

"Tell us Ron," said Harry.

Ron seemed to debate answering for a moment and then clearly gave up and opted for co-operating.

"She said she didn't want a fight," he admitted. "Right before she did this to me."

"I think she's acting on her own," said Harry turning back to Remus

"That may be," said his professor, "But it is better safe than sorry."

"You're right," said Harry. "Lets go."

"Go where?" asked Fred coming into the room. In his arms were bandages and Mrs. Weasely was following close behind.

"Ah, good you brought bandages for your brother."

"What happened Ron?" asked Mrs. Weasely rushing over to her son.

"I brought them for Draco," said Fred. "Where the hell is he and what is going on."

Harry was surprised at the fury he saw in Fred's face. Looking around the room clearly he wasn't the only one baffled by Fred's tone.

"He's gone, now give me something for these," said Ron gesturing to himself as Mrs. Weasely fluttered around him assessing the damage.

"Would you have given them to Draco after you beat the shit out of him?" demanded Fred, the accusation dripping from his words.

"Fred!" said Mrs. Weasely, her tone distressed from the animosity between her two sons.

"I came in here and he was laying face down in the mud beaten to a bloody pulp," said Fred defending himself to his mother and to the rest of the group.

"Not again Ronald," said Mrs. Weasely, her concern and frustration changing from one son to the other quickly.

"He deserved it," said Ron.

"For what?" demanded Fred. "For loving her?"

"He doesn't love her!" shouted Ron. Harry watched Fred's face turn red like he was about to explode. Harry had never seen Ron and his brother resort to fisticuffs and he was fairly certain that's where they were headed if things kept up.

"This isn't the time for this conversation said Lupin stepping forward. "Narcissa Malfoy knows where we are. We have to move."

"Narcissa?" asked Fred.

"Yeah, she's just as bad as he son," said Ron.

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Mrs. Weasely's voice rang out and everyone froze. She stared each person down in the tent.

"Ronald, what you did was unacceptable REGARDLESS of whether young Mr. Malfoy deserved it or not. I did not raise you to torture and beat people and I am ashamed of your behavior." Her tone was severe and Harry could feel how devastated Mrs. Weasely was at her son's actions. "As for the rest of you. We are going to focus on getting packed up and get somewhere safe," She turned gestured to Fred and Ron. "This conversation is not over. Clearly things need to be discussed, but now is not the time."

Harry watched as the group agreed and dispersed.

* * *

When Hermione woke the air was damp with rain. She blinked and rolled out of bed her feet touching hardwood floors.

"What?" she looked down confused at the sudden change of location.

She padded down the stair towards the voices and was met with the sight of everyone sitting around a small table crowded close together as Mrs. Weasely served the group breakfast with the help of some magical assistance.

Silence fell on the group as Hermione walked into the room.

"What happened?" she asked.

"We had to move unexpectedly," said Harry.

"Why?" asked Hermione.

"Because our camp was compromised," answered Ron she noticed he had a few faint pink lines on his cheek and wondered where they had come from.

"By who?" asked Hermione feeling like she was playing twenty questions.

"By Narcissa Malfoy," answered Fred coming to stand near her. "How are you feeling this morning?"

"Better," she admitted and then looked around Fred's shoulder. "Where is Draco?"

"Hermione, now…isn't really a good time, we just moved, let us enjoy some breakfast," said Harry.

"You insensitive prick," said Hermione. "The last thing I remember is feeling Draco in danger through the bind. Right after Ron left the tent I might add. Now I want to know where he is and. I want to see him."

No one answered and Hermione looked straight at Ron.

"Where is he?" she asked again.

Ron stood pushing back from the table and walked around so that he was standing in front of Hermione. Fred moved to the side slightly to allow them to face off.

"Everything I did I did for you," said Ron. "Because he deserved it for what he did to you," Ron picked up her hand, his voice gentle. "I love you 'Mione. I hate what he did to you."

Hermione yanked her hand back.

"You don't know what love is," said Hermione shaking her head. "Love is putting someone else before yourself. Love is doing what the other person needs even if it's hard. Its caring, its sacrifice."

"Is that what he made you think he did? Sacrificing himself by torturing you?" Ron's voice was incredulous.

"You have no idea what he went through to keep me safe!" protested Hermione.

"Do you hear yourself?" said Ron. "I'm glad he's gone. It will give you time to realize that he clearly put you under some kind of a spell to make you believe this bullshit your spouting."

"It's not bullshit!" yelled Hermione. "Tell me where he is!"

"I traded him away for something actually useful," said Ron, his chest puffing out.

"You…traded him?" Hermione's whole body shook with the violence of the emotions coursing through her. "Like an object."

"Yeah," said Ron. "For a Horcrux."

Ronald Weasely did not see the punch coming that broke his nose.

* * *

 **If I didn't think that people would have felt I was "Drawing it out" or taking too long with this section I would have ended this chapter with the line "I'm hers" because I love that line and think it would have been a fabulous chapter ending.**

 **However, I DO LISTEN and you guys have been giving me feedback that leads me to believe you wouldn't have enjoyed that ending near as much as this one. So here you go-a giant GIANT chapter.**

 **And guess what? Next week is going to be what so many of you want-the DRAMIONE REUNION! So stay tuned.**

 **Also, if you liked this 9k monstrosity please give me some love in the comments.**


	46. Chapter 44: The Vigilante

**thank you to everyone who took the time to leave some positive reviews for me. I am updating while on vacation from my tablet because I have no Wi-Fi and it's been interesting to work on here. I hope you enjoy the chapter and the fact that even though I am supposed to be relaxing I am up at 3 in he morning posting this to make sure it get out on a Monday.**

 **This is amother long one folks ( almost 9k again...it was supposed to be shorter but typing got away from me a little) There is a lot of ground covered. I tried to balance not overdoing descriptions and interactions while also not glossing too much. I hope you can enjoy the way it reads.**

* * *

Chapter 44: The Vigilante

Day 1

Fred sat across the wooden table from Harry and yet he felt a million miles away. Fred was far from happy with how things were and how they had turned out and he held Harry partially to blame.

Hermione had been put under with magic after punching Ron in the face, and taken up to her room. Ron had refused to let anyone help him fix his nose, opting for storming out to be alone. George had gone to try and talk to him and Ginny had headed up to bed exhausted from a long day.

Harry ran a hand through his hair and looked up at Fred.

"Why is it all such a wreck?" asked Harry and he slammed a fist down on the table. Fred only jumped slightly at the outburst.

"You tell me mate, why didn't you listen to Hermione at all when she told you Draco had stuck up for her?" He knew there was accusation in his tone and he didn't care.

"What was I supposed to believe?" asked Harry holding out his hands. "You remember what she looked like in that Photograph. He was the one holding her up." Harry's fists clenched and unclenched on the table. "I wanted to kill him."

"But you didn't. Instead you let my brother beat the shit out of him."

Harry gave Fred a look.

"You have no idea what it was like for Ron," said Harry.

"No," said Fred. "I don't, but that doesn't justify what he did."

"Doesn't it?" asked Harry. "He had the man he thought was responsible for torturing Hermione-"

"I'm going to stop you right there," said Fred. "The man he **_thought_** ," Fred emphasized the word thought with a finger on the table. "He didn't know, he didn't confirm. She didn't wake up and say- 'where is he let me at the bastard who hurt me,'"

"She could have been under the imperius curse."

"COULD HAVE," said Fred exasperated. "You are missing the point."

"So are you!" said Harry. "You were dead, she was hostage!"

"Yeah well I'm not dead and you know who you can thank for that? Draco. A.K.A the guy you let get tortured."

"It could have been part of a plan the dark lord put in place. It still could be a part of that plan….Maybe what I saw with Narcissa…maybe that was just what he wanted me to see."

"That's bullshit and deep down you know it," said Fred. He couldn't believe that Harry was being so stubborn. Actually he could believe it. Harry had always been stubborn. It was infuriating as all hell to be on the other side of that mule-like trait.

"No I don't," protested Harry which only served in making Fred roll his eyes.

"He gave me Felix Felicis Harry, you know how valuable that is."

"He's a Malfoy, they have all the money in the world."

"He made it himself."

"How do you know that?" demanded Harry. "Did he tell you that himself?"

"Yes," said Fred. "And I believed him."

"Why?"

Fred stood up and reached into his pocket, his movements sharp and his face grim. He slammed a box down on the table.

"Here's why," he pointed to the box. "You think this was part of the dark lord's fucking plan?!" he demanded.

"What is that?" asked Harry.

"Rowena Ravenclaw's Diadem," snapped Fred. "A fucking Horcrux."

"Where did you get that?"

"It's not the where that matters Harry," said Fred. "It's the how."

Harry opened the box and Fred saw him pull back and saw the recognition that it was truly a Horcrux sitting in front of him.

"How?" asked Harry looking up

"The Felix Felicis," said Fred and he stepped back from the table. "You know the stuff Draco Malfoy gave me to hell me to escape. The stuff he gave me so I could get word to you and rescue Hermione and him both." Fred snorted. "When you wake up and smell the coffee, I'll be waiting to hear you say you were wrong about him and I want to be around when you tell him you're sorry."

With that Fred left Harry alone at the table staring darkly into the blue sapphire at the center of the Diadem.

* * *

Draco woke slowly and found himself in a small, comfortable bed surrounded by pillows. He blinked and tried to sit up.

"No," his mother's voice cut through, her hand at his shoulder pressing him down.

"What happened? Where am I?" he asked.

"You're with me, and you're safe," she answered in a comforting tone.

"But I was with the order? What happened?" he tried to sit again and Narcissa cast a quick spell keeping him down. He felt his body struggle and then relax.

"It's alright," said Narcissa, her tone soothing as she stroked his hair.

"Are they all dead?" he asked dreading the answer. He didn't want them to be dead. Hermione would hate it if they had all died because his mother tried to save him.

"No" answered Narcissa. "Thought I wanted to kill the Weasely boy for what he did to you."

"How did you get me out?"

"I gave them something they needed in order to defeat HIM."

Draco was momentarily taken aback.

"What?" he asked.

"Your father is dead," said Narcissa and she straightened. "And you would be too if it weren't for that Muggle-born girl. HE would have just let you die when all that he needed to do was remove the mark. He refused."

Draco reeled. His mother was fighting against Voldemort?

Then the other part of what she had said sunk in.

 _My father is dead._

 _My father is dead._

 _He's dead._

Draco felt his heart thud in his chest.

A part of him hated his father…and at the same time…Lucius was the man who had raised him…he had always wanted his father to be proud of him one day…Draco felt a tear slip down his cheek and he couldn't understand why. All of this…everything that had happened was Lucius fault and yet…it was still his father who had died.

Draco turned his head away.

"I'll let you rest," said Narcissa and she kissed his forehead before leaving Draco alone.

 _My father is dead._

It was only a matter of moments before Draco fell back asleep, though it could hardly be called rest. He had nightmares the whole night about all of the abuse he had suffered at his father's hands….and about the fact that he would never see the man who raised him again.

* * *

Day 3

"I want out of this bloody room," Hermione said gesturing around.

"I don't think that's a good idea right now," answered Ginny. "My brother is still a bit miffed that you broke his nose."

"I don't give a flying pig's arse that he's pissed. I hope he got two black eyes out of the deal!" said Hermione and then she saw the look on Ginny's face and she sighed. "I'm sorry," she said and sat down. "I know he's your brother."

"He loves you," said Ginny quietly.

"Then why the hell doesn't he bloody listen to me?" asked Hermione.

"Because what you are saying doesn't make a whole lot of sense."

"I don't care if it makes sense or not, it's the truth."

Ginny pursed her lips.

"Why don't you tell me what happened," said Ginny. "I promise if there is any part you don't want to talk about or any part you don't want me to share…even with Harry. I won't push and I won't tell…but…I want to understand. I need to know what happened."

Hermione looked across at the young woman sitting opposite her. Ginny was younger than her and yet felt like a sister to her. Especially over the past few years. When you got older age seemed to matter less and Hermione had never really had a female friend. She had always just had Ron and Harry…that had always been enough. Now here she was with Ron pissed at her and her pissed at him and Harry…well Harry didn't understand.

She looked at Ginny and then she opened her mouth.

Like a flood gate it all came out all the gory details. What she had been through, how she had suffered and what Draco had done to protect her.

The only things she left between her and Draco was the secret of his oasis and the things she had seen in his head from his childhood because those were not her secrets to share, they were his secrets and she would keep them for him. Always.

When she was finished Ginny sat looking at her.

"You were willing to die for him," said Ginny evenly.

"Yes," Hermione nodded.

"And he did all that…for you…"

"You have to understand," said Hermione. "Being in his head…the bind…it made it so that there was nothing that could be kept hidden Ginny. It was like seeing his soul on display."

"Are you in love with him?" Her brother had asked Hermione the same question. His tone had been an accusation. Ginny was asking for real.

"I…" Hermione closed her eyes. "I don't know," she admitted. "I know he loves me and I care for him and I have never felt this way about anyone before but I don't know if it was the circumstances or if it was the bind…all I know is that…I need him in my life and that I care about him more than I have ever cared about someone..."

Ginny nodded and seemed to consider then she took a deep breath.

"I believe you," she said. "I believe you believe everything you just told me and I know how Fred feels. Ever since he gave Harry the Diadem he has refused to speak to him."

"The Diadem?"

"It's a Horcrux. Fred got it in the castle…" Ginny took a breath. "He says he only managed to get it because of the Felix Felicis that Malfoy gave him."

"Do you believe that?" asked Hermione looking Ginny in the eyes. She wanted Ginny to believe. She wanted an ally in this other than Fred. Someone who believed without seeing. Someone who trusted.

"I believe he believes it…" said Ginny and then she shook her head. "I know that there is a limit to the Imperius curse so if you tell me that you still mean everything you said in a week then I promise I will defend what you are saying even if it means standing up against Ron…but Do you understand how I…we could all be skeptical of this."

"I do," said Hermione. "But it doesn't mean I don't hate it." Hermione took a deep breath. "I think I'd like you to go now," she said and then in a tone that was harder she added: "Come back when you are ready to believe me."

* * *

Draco looked down at his arm for what felt like the millionth time.

When he had first woke he had worried that Voldemort was going to apparate to them immediately and kill him and his mother for having betrayed him. Then Draco had seen the remnants of the dark mark on his arm and somehow knew they were safe.

The mark on his forearm was dull and grey and had lines through it where the black veins had previously been. Somehow, at the point of death the curse that Ron had cast upon him had destroyed the mark. He could not feel any connection to the Dark Lord through the mark.

Draco wondered if it was a kind of fail-safe that the dark lord had installed so that no one could drain him through his followers.

No matter what it was, Draco was happy that the mark was broken. He only wished it was completely faded from his arm. He didn't want any reminder or connection to the Dark Lord, especially since he now planned on doing everything in his power to take Voldemort down.

As Draco silently rummaged through the front hall dresser he found himself wondering about Fred. How was the redhead doing? Had he made it safely back to his friends.

 _You can't afford any distractions,_ thought Draco.

He dismissed the thought immediately; Hermione would want him to care what had become of the young man she considered a brother.

 _That's not the only reason you care,_ he thought to himself. Even as he thought it he shook his head. Fred probably would hate him for letting Hermione die on his watch.

 _You were stupid to think you could have a friend,_ he scolded himself and turned to focus on the task at hand.

In the last drawer on the left hand side Draco found what he was looking for. His mother had told him that his great-grandfather had kept a collection of wands from all the wizards he had defeated during the Second World War.

Draco had every intention of finding one that would serve his purpose.

There in the bottom of the drawer were two dozen wands.

Draco felt a shudder pass through him.

How many of these wands had belonged to good Witches or Wizards and how many of them had belonged to dark ones?

He picked the up one by one testing them.

"What on earth are you doing out of bed?" demanded Narcissa as he shattered a painting on the wall with the fourth wand. "You should be resting."

"I have rested enough," answered Draco. "You did an excellent job getting me well mother."

"I don't want to see that effort go to waste because you pushed yourself too soon," said Narcissa coming down the stairs towards him.

"I promise," said Draco. "My number one goal is to get strong again," _so that I can fight him…_ added Draco silently.

"Draco darling I love you," Narcissa put her hands on either side of his face. "You need to take care of yourself."

"I will," said Draco. "I need a wand though."

 _I need my wand,_ he thought darkly, _not the one that I had all through Hogwarts, but the one we found in Paris._

He felt as if the wand was calling to him across a great distance and as soon as he found a wand that he could trust to apparate him to his true wand's location he was going to go and find it. A part of him knew that he would only stand a chance against the dark lord with that wand in hand.

" _May this wand help you defeat your three headed monster young master Draco_ ," the wand maker's words rang loud in Draco's mind.

He needed that wand back.

"Promise me you'll go to bed after you have gone through these," she gestured to the wands in the drawer and the ones he had already set aside as an ill-fit.

"I promise," he said. He would go to bed. He would give his mother the solace she needed and then first thing…before sunrise he would find his wand and get it back.

* * *

Day 4

Draco found himself outside another small house.

He looked up at the steps.

This was where the spell had taken him

This was where the order was hiding out.

He felt the pull of his wand in the charm around his neck. As he approached the house the charm shone brighter letting him know he was closer to his 'lost object'

Worried that it would give him away with its light Draco tucked it inside his shirt and made his way through the front door with a quick alohomora.

There, facing the other way and standing sentry, was Harry Potter.

Draco cast a quick sleep spell and caught the boy before he could fall. Draco glanced around quickly to make sure that no one else was around and then he eased Harry down in to the nearest chair and went looking for his wand.

He found it in the bottom of a chest near the fireplace along with his wand from school.

He picked them both up and then frowned.

While his ironwood wand seemed to dance with excitement in his hand the other seemed unhappy at being lifted.

 _This isn't your wand anymore…._ he found himself thinking and he looked back at Harry who was snoring lightly in the kitchen chair.

Harry had wrestled the wand from his hand back at the mansion while the glass form the chandelier was lodged in his eyes.

Had his old wand changed loyalties?

Draco heard the creak of footsteps above and he dropped his old wand, not bothering to waste time thinking on it further.

He slammed the lid closed to the chest and took hold of his true wand and apparated away… not before a certain one-eyed red head caught a fleeting glimpse of him from the top of the stairs.

* * *

Day 5

Draco was doing push-ups when his mother came into the room.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"What does it look like?" he answered and did another down-up.

"You should be resting," she said in a very motherly tone.

"No," said Draco and went down again.

"Yes," said Narcissa crossing her arms.

Draco pushed himself up and turned to face his mother.

"Mother," he closed his eyes, slightly out of breath from the workout he had been putting himself through. "You are an amazing woman. You marched in behind enemy lines and kicked ass to save me."

"Language," she said re-folding her arms over her chest.

"Please understand what I am saying when I tell you that I can't just sit back and do nothing."

"What are you planning on doing?" she said her voice laced with worry.

Draco looked her dead in the eye and told her part of the truth.

"I plan on getting stronger."

* * *

Several hours later as the sun set Draco stood shirtless in front of the full length mirror in his room. He was thinner than he had been before the curse. He had started working out, but there was still a long way to go before he could gain back all of the muscle that he lost.

The biggest difference was in his face.

His mouth was set in a determined line. The sneer, which had been a near permanent expression in school was no where to be seen.

His cheekbones, which had always been sharp, were a harsh contour on his face.

His eyes…were no longer guarded. They held all the sadness in the world when he looked in the mirror.

He missed her.

He wanted to be with her more than anything.

Draco looked down at the grey mark on his arm...the Dark mark…a reminder of what he had been and looked back up.

He wanted a reminder of who he was now.

 _Who I am because of her…_

He went to the book case of spell books down the hall and searched until he found one about marks and tattoos. He read until early morning. There were so many different kinds of marks, and so many different spells. Some were charms for protection others would give temporary powers, some were only decorative.

When he found the spell that he was looking for he mumbled the words several times until he was ready and then he went and stood in front of his mirror once more.

Lifting his wand Draco began to cast and weave a spell for a mark. He closed his eyes and put everything he had into the image inside his mind.

He imagined her turning into the Phoenix from his dreams and flying away. Flying free and safe high above him, guarding and guiding him.

She had healed him in so many ways, like the tears of Phoenix she had saved his soul from the point of death.

When he opened his eyes there was an image of a phoenix branded over his heart, its wings and body wrapping down around his side while the head and check curled over his pectoral. The colours were vivid and shimmered when he moved. It almost looked like his side was on fire.

In the lowest part of the image, hidden within the tail feathers were three initials:

H.J.G.

He cast a spell to make the mark permanent.

She was a permanent brand on his soul and now when he looked in the mirror he would have the comfort of seeing her-forever-on his skin.

* * *

Hermione paced her room like a caged animal.

They brought her food, they brought her water, they even brought her books, but she still felt more like a prisoner here than she did with Draco.

 _It's because he was trying to protect you from a real danger and they are only trying to protect you from what they believe is dangerous._

She also hated that she didn't have a wand.

She felt naked and vulnerable without any source of protection.

Draco had given her a wand.

It was almost like he had given her a piece of her own power back.

And then when Greyback had attacked she had used that wand to take back the rest of her power. A part of her hated what she had done…and at the same time….she knew she was protecting future girls from his attacks by doing what she had. She had felt like she lost a part of herself with the killing and at the same time gained a strength to carry on.

Now she was here with nothing but her thoughts and it was driving her mental.

Images of everything that she had been through were cascading through her head on a loop that was getting faster and faster and darker and darker with each passing hour that she spent alone.

It was her fault that she was alone, she had sent everyone away and refused to speak to any of them. If they wouldn't believe her then she had nothing to say to them.

She wanted Draco.

She wanted to talk with him.

Why hadn't he come back for her?

 _Because of what Ron did to him…._

Fred had told her that Ron had tortured Draco before trading him off like an object.

It had made her hate Ron.

She couldn't get over it.

 _But why won't he come?_ She found herself asking.

He had told her that he would stay with her…that he would never leave her and here she was trapped and alone and he wasn't coming to the rescue.

 _You should rescue yourself,_ she told herself angrily. _You escaped from the Manor._

This time was different though…

She didn't want to fight her friends.

She didn't want to wreck their house or the objects in it.

She didn't want to hurt them.

She was trapped by her love for them and it made her feel utterly powerless.

Hermione threw herself down on the bed and screamed into her pillow until her throat was sore. She never wanted to feel powerless again.

* * *

Day 7

"Harry," said Ginny.

"What?" asked Harry.

"I think we should believe Hermione and Fred."

Harry's head swung round to look Ginny in the eyes.

"Why?" he asked. He was already starting to believe his friends story…hell he had started to believe long ago-now the guilt was beginning to eat at him thinking about what he had allowed Draco to go through if he was indeed on their side fighting for them and protecting Hermione.

"She told me about what happened to her at the manor."

Harry raised an eyebrow at that and tried to school his face when he wanted to scowl. Hermione was supposed to be his best friend. Why had she felt more comfortable talking with Ginny.

 _You know why_ , his mind answered. _You wouldn't listen._

"Okay," said Harry and Ginny came to sit next to him on his bed.

"I know you're upset about all this Harry," she said and she stroked his hair over his ear. "It's not your fault that you didn't know or didn't believe. You had ever reason not to….we all did, but it's been a week and she still feels the same."

"I know…" said Harry shaking his head.

"We can't keep her locked in her room," said Ginny. "You know it's wrong."

"She's a danger to herself and others," said Harry and he hated the way the words sounded coming from his mouth. Hermione was his friend…

"Do you hear yourself?" asked Ginny. "This is your friend you are talking about."

"I…" Harry's face crumpled. "I know."

"Then let her out."

"If we give her a wand she's just going to go to him."

"So don't give her a wand," said Ginny. "But let her out." She leaned into Harry and kissed his cheek. "Remind her that we are here for her and her friends. Maybe then we can convince her that going after Draco isn't the smartest idea while this whole war is going on."

"You're right," said Harry.

"I often am," said Ginny with a little bit of that mischievous smile that her brothers were known for. Her mood shifted as she looked into his eyes. "Kiss me Harry," she said softly. "Let forget about the war for a little while."

Harry did kiss her then, until there was nothing else in the world except each other.

* * *

Ron sat at the fireplace on the second floor of the house, far away from everyone else.

"She's gone mental," he said to the face in the flames.

"It's not her fault," said Lavender Brown. "Think about everything she's gone through Ron-won."

"I'm surprised you're taking her side," he said almost in a snap.

"Don't get mad at me," she said pouting.

"You're right…I'm sorry," he apologized. "It's just…it's like she's not even the same person anymore. It's like she forgot everything that we were."

Ron was so frustrated he wanted to scream.

She had broken his nose and he had walked around with it that way for two days, with two black eyes before he had finally let someone fix it.

"I would never forget you," said Lavender quietly. "No matter what they did to me. I would never forget how I feel about you."

Ron looked across at Lavenders face in the flames and knew that she meant every word. He wanted to hear her say it. It felt good to hear her say it…but he also wanted Hermione to turn around and tell him that she loved him and she was wrong.

"I've got to go," he said shaking his head. "We'll talk later."

"Okay," she answered clearly disappointed.

Ron stoked the fire and went to his room.

Lavender was right, it wasn't Hermione's fault that she had come back from everything she had gone through messed up…but…shouldn't she still love him?

 _Maybe she never really loved you in the first place,_ he thought. _Not like Lavender does._

Ron shook his head. He remembered a time when Lavender's love and affection had seemed like too much. Hermione had been jealous. It was the only good thing that had come of the short relationship. Now though…he wanted that back. It was nice to feel adored. Why couldn't Hermione adore him like Lavender did?

He loved Hermione, he shouldn't be thinking thoughts like this.

Still…he was sure Lavender wouldn't have forgotten him so easily. Why had Hermione?

* * *

Draco slipped silently through the dark Forest.

The place still made his skin crawl and sent shivers down his spine, however, after everything he had faced…it didn't hold the same sway, especially since he was doing this for her, and Draco would do anything for her.

As his thoughts drifted to Hermione the tattoo above his heart warmed. He was happy for the company the incantation allowed: every time he thought of Hermione it would grow warm in a pleasant way serving as a constant reminder that she was there with him in his heart even if she was no longer with him in body.

There were two death eaters on patrol.

Two to one was plenty good enough odds for Draco.

He shot at the first one with a stupefy nailing his opponent straight in the chest. The second death eater caught his movements and began to rapid fire spells at Draco. He was clearly the more experience duelist. Draco grabbed one of the small glass, hollow marbles from the pouch at his hip and threw it towards the death eater while parrying his attacks.

As soon as the glass broke there was an explosion which threw them both backwards. Draco blinked from his back on the ground his ears ringing loudly.

Well that was a fucking grenade of an explosion he thought shaking his head and trying to get his bearings.

"What's going on over there?" Draco heard the muted yells through the ringing and suddenly there were two more death eaters. He rolled behind the nearest tree and blinked trying to catch his breath. Then he turned back and began fighting the two deatheaters who had come to the aid of the first set.

Draco knew that his time was running out.

He had to dispatch these two quickly before others came and outnumbered him. He raised his wand over his head, temporarily opening himself up for attack. One managed a shot at his ribs. It burned the electric bold searing his skin and making his whole side cramp. He spun his wand overhead and the image of a great white dragon appeared from his wand and flew out slamming into both the death eaters simultaneously before bursting into flame. Draco grabbed the wands from the closest two and then apparated back to the hideaway before any more could come.

* * *

Day 14

"You need to give her a bloody wand," said Fred. He was getting tired of the drama and the discussions. He was tired of seeing Hermione without any kind of personal protection. While he had been keeping an eye out for her he could see that she hated having to rely on others to look out for and keep her safe. She had been doing that for too long and Fred wasn't having it anymore. He wanted to see his friend recover and get stronger and to do that she needed to be given a wand.

"It's out of the question," said Ron.

"You're just worried she'll mess up your face more with the wand than she did with her own first," said George referring to the slight bump in Ron's nose from where it had healed wrong after waiting too long to reset it.

"I am not," said Ron angrily. "I'm worried she'll just apparate to go find HIM and get herself killed."

"It's her choice," said Fred. "If she wants to go to him she should be able to."

"No she bloody shouldn't," said Ron.

"Harry, what do you think?" asked Fred hoping that the dark haired boy would take his side.

"I think that once we know she's not going to do anything reckless we can give her a wand."

"Because the three of you never did anything reckless before all this started," said Fred sarcastically.

"That's not the point," Ron crossed his arms. "And it always turned out."

"Yeah," said Fred. "Because she was there fixing you guys messes."

"Not every time," protested Harry, even though Fred could see that Harry knew he was right. He had heard enough of their stories. The golden trio had a habit of rushing into things and one of the only reasons why they hadn't died several times over was Hermione's quick thinking.

"Enough times," said George.

"We're not giving her a wand yet and that's final," said Ron.

"Oh is it now?" asked Fred. "And who put you in charge?"

"I'm the one that cares about her the most," stated Ron adamantly.

"Who are you to say that?" said Fred, his brother's comment grating against his nerves. "I love her too."

"Not the way I do."

"This isn't a competition," said Harry cutting in. The others looked towards him. "Listen we all love Hermione. No one can argue that so there is no point in arguing about who loves her more or less." He paused. "She can have a wand," said Harry.

"WHAT?" yelled Ron.

"If," said Harry giving Ron a look. "She promises not to use it to go find Draco," Harry took a deep breath. "We all know that Hermione is a witch of her word. If she promises then there is no reason not to give her a wand."

"Fine," said Fred. "You get to be the one to make her promise NOT to go see the man she knows saved her life," with that Fred stormed out of the tent.

He was getting more and more pissed off at how thick headed everyone was being over this. Couldn't they see by now that Draco wasn't the enemy?

 _They didn't see at the manor and they didn't see him come and go the other night,_ thought Fred to himself as he remembered Draco retrieving his wand from the house without harming a soul.

Fred had debated telling the others. Draco being there technically meant that their place was compromised. Something had stopped him from doing it though: the trust that he had in the fact that Draco loved Hermione.

 _So why hasn't he reached out to her?_ The redhead wondered. He was jostled from his thought before he could ponder further, by his brother's hand on his shoulder.

"What?" he asked George.

"I believe you," said George.

"What?" Fred repeated.

"What are you a parrot?" asked George. "I believe you about Draco. I'm sorry I didn't say something before, but I'm saying it now. I believe you."

Fred looked his brother in the eyes and he felt a weight lift off his shoulders. He had George had always done things together, it had felt heavier to carry this on his own without his twin.

"Thanks," said Fred and George-as if sensing what he needed-wrapped his arms around Fred in a tight hug.

"Have I mentioned lately how glad I am that you are alive?" asked George.

"It wouldn't hurt to say it again," Fred mumbled into his shoulder.

"I'm really glad you're alive."

"Me too," said Fred. "Me too."

* * *

Hermione was reading in the paper about a strange and ongoing puzzle. Deatheater's had been turning up bound and gagged at the ministry of magic. She had heard rumors through the order that some were "escaping' a few hours after being caught, while others were being held for trial. With the Dark Lord having so much influence it was no surprise that many of them were just vanishing from their bonds…still. Who would defy Voldemort so openly? And who in the order was moonlighting as a vigilante?

The knock at the door startled her from her thoughts.

"Can I come in?" Hermione was surprised to see Harry knocking at her door. He had been avoiding her for the most part over the last week.

"The door is open," she said flatly. She didn't have a wand to magically lock it, and no one seemed to pay attention when she did it by hand.

"Can I come in?" he repeated, clearly giving her the choice. Hermione sighed.

"Yes."

"Thank you," harry came over and sat in a chair facing her. "I'm sorry if the last few weeks back weren't the happy reunion you were expecting," he said sincerely.

"It could have been if you all hadn't decided to torture and barter off the man who saved my life," snapped Hermione and then closed her eyes taking a deep breath. Snapping at Harry wasn't going to do anything. She already knew he wasn't really listening to her.

None of them were.

Ginny had said she believed Hermione, but Hermione wasn't sure if she believed that was true.

Fred believed her, but that was only because Fred knew the truth.

"Sorry," she muttered, though her heart wasn't in the apology.

"It's alright," said Harry surprising her. "I want to give you your wand back," said Harry, but I need you to promise me that you won't use it to go to him."

"And if I don't?"

"Then I can't in good conscious give it to you."

"So you are giving me my wand back with a leash attached to it."

"You shouldn't think of it that way," said Harry standing.

"Oh?" Hermione stood facing him. "And how should I think of it? Hmmm?"

"As a step back to normalcy," harry turned to walk out. "It's your choice."

"Wait!" yelled Hermione and Harry stopped. "Aright," she said. "Fine. I promise I won't use it to go to him," she hated the concession but she was willing to make it if she could have her wand back.

"You promise," said Harry looking her dead in the eye.

"I promise," she nodded.

"Okay." Harry reached into his robes and withdrew her wand.

Hermione felt a sucker punch in her gut. She hadn't seen her real wand since the night when the chandelier had come crashing down. When she held out her hand to take it she found that she was shaking.

"I kept it safe for you," said Harry.

"Thank you," said Hermione automatically. Her fingers wrapped around the smooth handle and one of the pieces of herself felt like it had come back home.

* * *

Day 18

"You need to stop this Draco," said Narcissa slamming the news paper down on the breakfast table in front of him.

"Stop what?" asked Draco taking another bite of his eggs benedict.

"Don't play dumb with me Draco," snapped Narcissa. "I went through hell loosing you once do not make me go through it again."

"What do you want me to do?" asked Draco pushing back in his chair. "Sit like a china doll up on a shelf and wait till all this blows over? You asked me to be a great man. All I am doing it trying to be a good one."

"By risking your life to put away deatheaters who don't even stay prisoner?"

"I am doing what I can to take him down. Every deatheater who's wand I take is a little less powerful, even if they escape and not all of them are being released."

"Enough of them are."

"And what do you suggest?" asked Draco crossing his arms over his chest.

"I suggest you let the order handle it."

"I am not going to sit back and watch him destroy the world."

"I hate him just as much as you," shot Narcissa. "But I've seen how you look when you come home at night. Sometimes you can barely stand upright from the damage they've inflicted. I don't want to lose you," she said repeating the last sentiment.

"Then help me," said Draco, his voice pleading. "You know where they live taking them out where they feel the safest is going to be safer than hunting around the school. They are ready for me now, its getting hard and hard to have the element of surprise."

"Then just stop," pleaded Narcissa coming over and holding her son's face in her hands. "Please."

Draco shrugged out of her embrace.

"I am not stopping," he said.

 _I can't. She would want me to help them and this is the only way I can._

Draco turned to walk away.

"Help me or don't. I'm not going to stop"

* * *

As Draco was preparing to leave to hunt more Deatheaters his mother came to his room.

"You won't stop me," he said not looking at her.

"I know," she answered and held out a piece of paper.

"What's that?" he asked turning towards her. "It's the address of a lower down the totem death eater. Take it."

Draco hesitated a moment and then took the slip of paper from his mother.

"If you want to make a real difference you have to do something to stop them for real. You need to take them out of the game."

"I don't want to kill people if I don't have to."

"And if you have to?" she asked looking at him intently.

"Then I will," he answered flatly.

"Wipe them," she said.

"What?" Draco frowned.

"I don't want you carrying their deaths on your head and I don't want those who get away to know that it was you who was responsible. Wipe their memories. Make it so they can't remember you or the dark lord or why they were even fighting in the first place."

"I can't take someone's whole life away, it's worse than killing them."

"It give the ones who can be redeemed a blank slate to start over and it takes away the power from those who have nothing left inside worthy of redemption."

Draco weighed his mother's words.

He remembered how severely Hermione had reacted to losing only one day.

 _A full obliviate should be considered one of the unforgivable curses,_ he thought to himself. He knew it never would be considering how often it was used on muggles; That didn't change the fact that it was wrong.

What if someone did that too him?

What if he forgot Hermione?

 _I would never forget her_ , he protested, even though he knew with the right wizard and the right spell he could. He felt the tattoo on his chest warm and the ache in his heart eased. Even if someone made him forget her she would still be with him. She would always be with him, inside and out.

* * *

Harry was happy to see a little of the old Hermione return along with her wand. She had started spending time with the other members of the order and even seemed to laugh and smile once and while, although not when Ron was around.

It was clear to Harry that something was broken between them on a much deeper level. He knew that particular bond would take longer to repair and a part of him doubted that things would ever really be the same between them. He knew that Ron blaming Hermione for Fred's death was the kind of thing one didn't easily get over.

Harry let Hermione in on the plans and about the Horcruxes. They hadn't destroyed them yet, as they didn't want the dark Lord to know that they had them. There was still at least one more and Harry didn't know what it was. As much as he hated when he saw inside Voldemorts mind he wished he could see that.

What he did see though was a sadness growing on Hermione like a creeping vine. When he found her sitting up in the middle of the night stabbing a bowl of soggy cereal with her spoon as she looked off into the distance he knew he had to ask what was going on.

"Hey," he said startling her out of her thoughts.

"Hey," she answered, her voice tired.

"What's going on?" he asked sitting down beside her.

"You wouldn't understand," she said looking away from him.

"Try me," said Harry. He wanted back in. He missed his friend. He missed the closeness he and Hermione had always shared. Ron was still pissed off at the world and so wasn't really around much and Hermione…well Harry missed how it had been before with her. She was his best friend and he felt like he was on the outside looking in. It was a lonely place to be.

Hermione seemed to look at him and debate whether or not she should say anything.

He was happy when she opted to open up.

"It's Draco," she said, her shoulders slumping.

"What about him?" asked Harry trying to keep calm and keep his tone neutral.

"It's just…" she seemed frustrated. "If he really did love me then where is he? Did what Ron did to him really scare him off that badly? And if so how much did he really love me? He said he would be here for me and he's not."

Harry saw the tears brim in Hermione's eyes and his heart wrenched inside his chest.

 _You need to tell her,_ he thought.

 _You shouldn't tell her, her not knowing is keeping her safe._

 _And it's also making her miserable. She promised she wouldn't go to him, so you need to trust her and tell her._

"Hermione," said Harry.

"What?" she asked wiping a tear that had spilled from her eye.

"There is something you should know…"

"What?" she asked her expression changing to one of worry.

"Draco isn't coming for you," said Harry. "Because he doesn't know you're alive."

* * *

Day 21

When Fred had gotten word that Harry had been keeping to himself the fact that Draco didn't know that Hermione was alive he was livid.

Draco thinking Hermione was dead explained everything: The fact that Draco hadn't come for Hermione and the fact that when Draco had come for his wand he hadn't bothered to try and see Hermione.

Fred knew that Hermione had promised not to use her wand to go to Draco.

Which was why Fred had procured the wand Hermione had been using at the mansion and was currently knocking at Hermione's door.

"GO AWAY," came the angry voice from inside.

"It's me," said Fred.

"I'm not in the mood to talk right now," said Hermione.

"That's fine because all I need is for you to open the door and listen."

There was silence for a moment on the other side of the door and then it opened. Fred slipped in.

"I heard about Draco not knowing and I know you made a promise not to use the wand Harry gave you to go to him."

"Yeah," said Hermione angrily.

"Which is why I brought you this," Fred reached into his pocket and pulled out the wand handing it to Hermione. "I won't ask you not to go to him," said Fred. "I'll only ask you to be careful…and tell him I say hi."

"Oh Fred!" Hermione threw her arms around his neck and Fred held her tight.

"I'm sorry I didn't do more before."

"It's okay, you were trying to deal with everyone here just like I was. It harder when you're dealing with people you love who are frustrating the hell out of you."

"Ain't that the truth," said Fred with a half smile. "Go to him," said Fred and he smiled when Hermione vanished before his eyes.

* * *

Draco was haggard and covered in blood. The fight tonight had been one of the hardest he had experienced. While he was getting strong it was still hard for him to take on multiple opponent's at once and this particular address had turned out to be hosting a dinner party.

He had been forced to fight six death eaters, luckily two of them had been outside or he was sure he would have been killed in the melee.

He stepped under the shower and let the spray wash it all away. He missed his shower at home. This one was just a plain, normal shower. He wanted the solace of his waterfall. Draco wanted a lot of things.

When he stepped out of the shower he made his way to bed and hauled on some pajama bottoms before collapsing.

He didn't remember falling asleep, but knew he had when he saw Hermione standing there in front of him.

"Hello," she said.

"Hello," he answered sadly sitting up and wincing from the pain.

"What happened?" Rushing over to him. "You're hurt."

"I'll be okay," he answered and touched her hand. "I missed you, I haven't slept deep enough to see you in the last few nights and I've missed you. Sometimes I just want to go to sleep and never wake up so I can be with you always, but I know that's not what you want."

"No," she shook her head. "It's not what I want."

He saw tears falling down her cheek and he wiped them away.

She felt so real it made his chest ache.

"It's okay," he said and kissed her forehead. "Don't cry. I haven't forgotten my promise," he said and pulled her close. "I won't give up. I promised I would live for you and I am. I'm trying to help your friends. I've been taking them out one by one."

"Who?" she asked.

"The deatheaters," he closed his eyes. "I almost forgot how good you smelled," he said buried his nose in her hair. "Merlin I miss you."

"I'm right here Draco."

"I know."

She pulled back and then he saw something in her eyes right before she kissed him. Electricity shot through his system as the softness of her lips struck him with the emotional force of a bulldozer.

Draco froze.

This wasn't a dream.

He shoved her back.

"Who the hell are you?" he demanded pointing his wand at her.

"Draco it's me," said the woman who looked and smelled and felt like Hermione.

"You're dead!" he said his heart ripping in two. "She's dead. Who are you?"

"It's me, for real… I swear," she was trembling in front of him and even though he could see a wand in her hand she didn't raise it.

 _I've cracked,_ he thought, _I have finally gone crazy._

"Draco it's me. How else would I know that when we were in the mansion you did everything you could to protect me including my heart by risking your life to make an illusion instead of raping me?"

"You died," he said, his voice cracking. "You took the curse from me and you died."

"I didn't," she said running forward. He held up his wand and she halted.

"You can't be real, this can't be happening. Someone is fucking with my head."

"No," She shook her head.

"HOW CAN I BELIEVE YOU?!" he yelled.

Hermione walked up to the tip of his wand and took hold of it with her hands placing it against her forehead.

"It's me," she said softly. "You let me in and I saw your life and your thoughts, I trust you with my life Draco. Tell me what I have to do to make you believe."

* * *

 **Thank you for reading, if you enjoyed please leave a review and let me know. Some of you may not think this chapter was necessary in he came way that I do, but for me...I wanted to show how strong and how much of a baddass Draco has become because in his head he has never been worthy of Hermione, but here force last several weeks he has been worthy and living for her. He is finally strong enough and believes he has changed enough that he is in a place where he can accept Hermiomes love instead of turning her away with the excuse that he " isn't good enough for her" I really believe in character development and I believed this needed to happen for him to be ready for her. To quote the wonderful book/movie " The perks of being a wallflower ": "** _ **we accept the love we think we deserve"**_

 **I hope at least some of you enjoyed seeing Draco become a baddass**

Next **chapter is going to be a nice and warm, and fuzzy one.. and slightly hot...,**


	47. Chapter 45: The Reunion

**So I am still on vacation (I'll be headed back home after the weekend) but I took time once again out of my trip to write and post this chapter. It is not quite as long as the last few, but it is still 6k so I hope you enjoy it.**

 **Thanks to everyone who took the time to review last chapter** : Akat x Deidara , NazChick, RotcehM , mmiller0000 , CatPeach. jacpin2002, Dauntless10 , Qween87, ALIASTESIN, HumbleHuffle, LovEToReadit, WeAllFallDown2003,IanAlphaAxel, Fanficfan826, Ayr , Jen7, mega700201, frizzy-wizzy-oringina, apls79, Aid4, ReaperofSouls22 , addictedtoloveandfiction , lady alegria , blackdeath49, Simione88 **and guests** "DramioneDestiny", "Who" and "D" **I appreciate each and every one of you.**

 **This chapter is dedicated to :** tomfeltonswifey **Thank you for your support and positive reviews and for sticking around, I appreciate you very much.**

* * *

Chapter 45: The Reunion

Draco stood looking at the person pretending to be the woman he loved. His wand pressing to the center of her forehead while she stood motionless, eyes closed, waiting for him to believe what she was saying.

 _But what she's saying is impossible,_ Draco shook his head mentally.

He wanted to hope.

He wanted to believe.

It was reckless and wrong to entertain such thoughts.

 _I can't lose her again_ , _I won't survive._

Drawn to the noise Narcissa appeared at the door, wand raised and at the ready.

She stepped in through the threshold towards her son.

"What's wrong? I heard yelling," she said as she took in the scene before her and then her eyes darkened landing on Hermione.

Draco watched as Hermione's eyes shot open at his mother's voice. Hermione backed up several steps raising her wand in the guard position facing Narcissa while still leaving herself completely vulnerable to any attack from Draco.

 _I could just take out the imposter now…_

"You," Narcissa said to Hermione twisting her wand angrily. "You let them torture him."

"I didn't, I swear I didn't know. I was unconscious," Hermione's voice was pleading and apologetic at the same time.

"A likely story," Narcissa stepped further into the room, closer to Draco, clearly maneuvering in order to get the upper hand and protect her son at the same time.

"It's true!" Hermione protested. "When I took the curse from Draco it nearly killed me. I was in a coma for days."

Draco felt a pounding begin in his temples.

It couldn't be true. She couldn't be alive…could she?

 _You saw her die…_

 _I saw her stop moving,_ the hopeful part of him said quietly. _I was knocked off the bed before I had a chance to check for a pulse._

 _She took a curse that was killing you,_ his mind argued back. _And it killed her. Think about what Ron said._

That caused Draco to pause.

Ron had not said that Hermione was dead only that Draco would never see her again...

"And how exactly did you take the curse from him? Hmmm?" asked Narcissa clearly not believing a word the younger witch was saying.

Draco felt something burning deep inside his chest and he felt the tattoo above his heart heating.

"She took it through the bind," Draco found himself saying the words without thinking they simply tumbled out of his mouth.

"Yes," said Hermione, her eyes darting towards him. She looked back to Narcissa quickly "I went inside Draco and I pulled the curse out and took it myself."

"And why would you do that?" snapped Narcissa. "Why aren't you dead instead?"

"She did die," said Draco. "This isn't the real Hermione." The words didn't sound right coming out of his mouth. The logical part of his mind told him that what he was saying was true…but his heart...his heart was getting other ideas.

"Yes I am!" protested Hermione addressing only Draco. "How else would I know all this?"

 _She has a point._

 _Your the one who just said out loud that she took the curse through the bond, she could just be running with it._

Draco's mind scrambled looking for excuses.

"You didn't answer my question as to why," said Narcissa twisting her wrist and her wand threateningly at Hermione.

"Go on," said Draco holding Hermione's gaze as he tried to sort out his own thoughts. "Answer her," he ordered.

"I took the curse through the bind because I owe Draco my life," said Hermione swallowing. Draco could hear in her voice that she wasn't fully telling the truth. "I thought it would kill me," she admitted and he heard the truth there. "Once it was inside me and I was fighting it I noticed it wasn't getting any stronger and that's when I realized…" she looked back to Draco. "The curse fed off the dark mark," she looked back to Narcissa. "And I don't have a dark mark for it to feed off of."

Silence hung in the room.

"You expect me to believe you were willing to die for my son after he raped you?" Narcissa's tone was full of accusation.

"I didn't rape her," said Draco

"He didn't rape me," said Hermione at the same time.

Draco's eyes met Hermione's and his heart shuddered inside his chest.

"Greyback saw," said Narcissa. "There is no point in denying it," her attention swung to Draco for the first time in the conversation. "What you did was wrong, and shameful, but to deny it is even worse."

"He's not lying," said Hermione. "He made an illusion, that's what Greyback saw."

"You expect me to believe he made an illusion convincing enough to fool Greyback in a matter of minutes?"

"Show her," said Hermione turning back to Draco. Her voice was pleading. "Show her the spell you used."

Even if it wasn't her Draco didn't know if he could resist giving into to the image of Hermione asking him for help.

 _She's your weakness,_ he told himself. _There are people in the order who know that, they could be using her against you._

 _She's your strength,_ another part of him argued back.

"I don't know how it will work on someone who is using polyjuice potion to impersonate a dead girl."

"I'M NOT IMPERSONATING HERMIONE GRANGER. I AM HERMIONE GRANGER!" Hermione yelled causing Narcissa to go back to high alert. "You're such a stubborn git sometimes Malfoy!"

The tone of her voice as she yelled at him was too spot on.

"Praestrogiae de Verum Vitae," Draco cast waving his wand. He watched as the spell settled over the woman in front of him and then made a direct replica which stepped away and off to the side. Both the original and the spell looked at Draco waiting.

It was more than a little disconcerting to have two of her there in front of him especially since the last time that had happened had been a horrible night...one that he wanted to forget...and yet...one that had made Hermione finally put some trust in him.

"Where and when did you learn that spell?" asked Narcissa and if Draco wasn't mistaken he thought he could hear a little bit of pride in his mother's voice.

"I read about it while at Hogwarts," he answered her with a shrug. "And I practiced it in Snape's class…he wasn't too please that I had left an image at my desk."

"I would imagine not," said Narcissa and she eyed Hermione up and down. "So does this prove it's the muggle-born then?" she asked and Draco noted that while she was still commenting on birth she wasn't using the slur he had grown up hearing.

"It should," said Hermione.

"No," said Draco

"And why not?" asked the first Hermione crossing her arms. The illusion followed suit a moment later and Draco dismissed the illusion quickly not wanting to have two of her staring at him with those eyes.

Those eyes that made it so hard for him to doubt that she was here for real.

"Because Hermione could have told Fred about what happened with the illusion before he left," said Draco.

"And you think Fred would let someone else impersonate me in order to get to you?" Hermione's voice had an odd sadness to it while asking.

"Fred is a member of the order," said Draco. "I wouldn't blame him for having loyalties to them over me."

Hermione let out a huff and rolled her eyes exasperated.

"Fred went to bat for you against everyone else," said Hermione glowering at him. "And he is the one who gave me a wand to come and find you."

"How can I believe that when nothing you have said isn't anything more than what he might have known and passed on?" Draco extended a hand out towards her. "What if this is simply his revenge? He knew how I felt about you and blames me for your death and so he is sending someone to punish me by showing up looking like…" Draco bit his tongue before he could say 'the woman I love' in front of his mother. "For all I know you could be Fred."

"I am NOT Fred," said Hermione exasperated. "I said before and I'll say it again. What do I have to do to make you believe?"

Draco felt his mother's eyes on him.

The only way that he was going to believe that the woman standing in front of him really was the woman he loved was if she let him into her mind so he could know it really was her through use of the bind.

 _It could be a trap,_ he reminded himself.

Going into someone else's mind...messing with anyone's mind could be the worst kind of trap.

He couldn't risk it.

There had to be another way.

He could have real proof if she she said something only Hermione would know.

Something that she could not have possibly told the Weasely twin.

 _Did he really stick up for me?_ Draco found himself thinking hopefully and then dismissed the thought angrily.

 _Don't be stupid._

The only thing that she could say that he would believe was from the last conversation that had happened between him and Hermione inside his head.

Draco glanced at his mother.

Narcissa Malfoy would not want to hear anything that Hermione was going to say…if in fact this was the real Hermione.

Because the last things that he had talked about with her involved him confessing his love for her and her insane response of taking the curse back through the bind with her

Draco felt his chest seize as he remembered laying there helpless unable to stop her. Unable to protect her and save her.

He had failed when it had mattered most...he hadn't been strong enough.

"Draco?" Narcissa's voice cut through the memories tormenting him.

He wanted it to be Hermione so badly.

He wanted to believe.

 _Don't be stupid_ , he repeated to himself, but it was too late. The flicker of hope had taken hold in him and he could not help perusing it.

"If…" he started and found himself swallowing, "If it really is you…" He closed his eyes and took a breath. When he opened them he set his jaw in a tight line. "If it really is you tell me the last thing that you said in my head before you grabbed hold of the dark and took it back through the bind."

There was an agonizing silence in response and then Hermione looked at him and he knew even before she opened her mouth that it was the real her just by the look in her eyes.

No one could tear him open with their eyes like she could.

No one could look at him and make him feel like they saw everything.

"Thank you for you love Draco, It is the greatest gift I have ever been given."

Draco closed his eyes and let the reality of the situation wash over him.

She was alive.

It was real.

"What?" His mother's voice broke through the warmth pumping through his veins. He watched as she turned her wand on Hermione and then Draco found himself moving before he could think.

He stood in front of Hermione blocking her with his entire body as his mother pointed her wand at the woman Draco loved.

"Don't" He pleaded.

"You can't love her!" Narcissa cried. Draco heard the agony in her voice.

"I do," he answered and he put an arm back holding Hermione in place when she would have walked around him.

 _Please stay behind me where it's safe,_ he pleaded with her silently.

He would not lose her again.

"She's a mudblood!" said Narcissa reverting to the dirty slur.

"Don't call her that," Draco shot.

"Move out of the way Draco," ordered Narcissa. "This witch has done something to you."

"Yes she has," answered Draco. "She made me into the man I am today. The man who is strong enough to fight for what he knows is right. The man who isn't afraid anymore-not of anything except losing her."

Draco watched as his mother trembled.

He knew that if he was going to break through to his mother that now was the time.

"She was willing to die for me," he said more gently. "Isn't that worth something?"

"But…" Narcissa blinked and he watched as his mother's breathing became erratic.

This was everything that a pure-blood witch of her birthright would be against.

This was everything his mother had stood against her whole life.

She had disowned her own sister Andromeda over this and here was her son standing in front of her declaring his love for someone who they had all believed could never be worth of someone 'Pure'

"Mother please…" he pleaded.

Please, don't make me choose between the two of you.

Because now that Narcissa was no longer under Voldemort's thumb...now that he wasn't worried about saving the life of the woman who had loved and raised him, he would make a different decision...he would choose Hermione.

Narcissa shook her head.

"How could you?" she asked and Draco could see in his mother's eyes that his actions felt like a betrayal to her.

His love for Hermione felt like a betrayal to Narcissa.

His mother had given up everything for him and now here he was throwing his love for Hermione in her face like a rejection of everything Narcissa had done for him for his entire life.

"Mom, I love you…"Draco found himself saying and he heard a hitch in his own voice.

 _You need to make her understand or you'll lose her in order to keep Hermione._

 _She'll never understand..._

 _You didn't understand...not until someone showed you how wrong you were to think of others as less._

"You've given up everything for me…" Draco continued and he glanced back at Hermione and he felt her lift a hand to place on his back in support. He looked back to his mother. "But so has she." his throat felt tight and still he pressed on "She fought for the redemption of my soul mum. I know she had to have gone against her friend to come back here to me…and she…she was willing to give up everything…to die for me…even after everything I put her through."

"I know you did it to protect me," said Hermione quietly enough that Draco knew his mother would not have heard. Still her words lent him strength.

"But…she's not like us…" Narcissa protested weakly.

"No, she's not," said Draco. "She doesn't have the breeding of a Black or a Malfoy. She doesn't have years of magical blood in her veins and yet she was top of all her classes. They call her the brightest witch of her generation. More than that though," said Draco. "She is brave and fearless and courageous and headstrong and, Stubborn." Draco shook his head. "You shouldn't be worried about whether or not she deserves someone 'pure' like me mother. You should be worried about how I could ever deserve someone as incredible, intelligent and strong as her."

Draco's words hung in the air and slowly Narcissa lowered her wand.

She took several deep breaths.

Draco waited knowing that whatever his mother would decide he had said all that he could.

While his father had never been someone who would ever come around to the idea of him loving someone like Hermione he knew that there was the smallest chance that his mother might…if for no other reason than Hermione had been willing to do just as much as Narcissa in order to protect him.

That was the one thing he knew the two women in the room had in common; they both-for some reason-seemed to love him more than reason should allow.

Narcissa took a final deep breath and then she lifted her chin.

"I'm going to go now," she said. "I have…to…I have to go," and with that she dissaperated leaving Draco and Hermione alone together.

* * *

Draco took in his mother's reaction for a moment.

She hadn't tried to stun Draco and kill Hermione.

She hadn't yelled and screamed and disowned him.

But she hadn't accepted his words and embraced them either.

 _It could have been much worse._

The awareness of Hermione behind him became a pull too strong to resist and he turned towards her slowly.

She was here, she was alive standing in front of him looking up at him with those enchanting eyes.

"You're alive," he said stating the obvious.

"Yes," she said and placed both of her hands, palm open, on his bare chest.

"How?" he asked putting away his wand and covering her hands with his own.

If felt so good to touch her and be touched by her. Nothing had ever felt better.

"I told you, the curse needed a dark mark to feed off of in order to grow," she said gently. "It was only a matter of time before I was able to beat it back." She looked up at him and Draco felt himself falling into her eyes.

 _I love you,_ he thought and meant it to the depths of his soul.

"I thought I had lost you," he said and he dropped his head down so that their foreheads were touching. He wanted to be closer. He needed to be closer to her.

"You didn't," she said closing her eyes, he felt her shift a little closer. "I'm right here."

"I missed you," he said, his voice cracking with emotion. "So bad. Every day, it was like a never ending ache inside my chest," he rubbed his forehead against hers and he felt her hands flex against his chest.

"I'm sorry," she said.

"What are you apologizing for?" he asked pulling back.

"For not coming sooner," she said looking intently at him. "I thought…I didn't know why you didn't come back for me…these last few weeks I kept wondering where you were and if you…how you could just go on without me."

"I didn't want to go on without you," said Draco shaking his head. "And then I dreamed about you and you made me promise to go on living….to live for you."

"Oh Draco," Hermione said his name fervently and closed the distance between them wrapping her arms around him and holding him so tightly.

"I promised I would…" he said and swallowed. "I've been hunting down deatheaters. Trying to make a difference to help your friends in the only way that I could. I knew they wouldn't accept my help. I knew they wouldn't believe me after what happened in the camp."

"I'm sorry about what happened," said Hermione and she leaned her torso back so she could look at him while keeping her arms wrapped tightly around him. "I swear I never would have let it happen. I was unconscious…and Fred…Fred…he didn't come back till later. As soon as he found out what was happening he tried to put a stop to it but then your mother came and…"

"Fred tried to stop his own brother?" asked Draco surprised.

Fred had stood up for him? Had tried to help him? An almost memory from back in the camp came to him, flickering on the edge of his thoughts. He could almost hear Fred's voice. Had Fred come to him while he was laying on the ground in the mud?

"Of course," said Hermione as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Fred cares about you...and...what Ron did was wrong."

"He thought I had hurt you."

"That's no excuse."

"It kind of is," said Draco. "I was like Greyback in his mind. An animal to be put down."

"You're nothing like that monster!" Protested Hermione stepping back. Draco immediately ached for her in his arms.

"He thought I was," said Draco. "He knew I tortured you and he found you in my bed. He thought I had…" Draco couldn't bear to say those words out loud. "I don't blame him," he finally finished.

 _Why the hell are you defending the redheaded git?_

"Well I do," said Hermione looking away.

"You shouldn't. He loves you."

"Not like you do!" protested Hermione. "If he loves me…it's as a friend or because he wants me…you, you love me like breath," said Hermione. "Look at what you've done for me!" she said her voice raising. "Look at what you've become for me! How could I ever deserve a love like yours?"

"Don't you ever say that," said Draco stepping forward and grabbing hold of her. "I have only become someone worthy of love BECAUSE of you."

"You were always worthy of love Draco," she touched his cheek gently and he felt his soul stir at the touch.

"Not love like yours," he said softly and he watched as Hermione shifted.

 _She just came back to you, don't push her away._

"It's okay," he said gently. "You don't have to say it."

"But…"

"Shhhh," he put his finger over her lips. "I know I put you through hell long before you came to the manor. I don't blame you for not saying it back. It doesn't matter….what matters is that you are here now and no matter how you feel I love you. Whatever you need Hermione. I am yours. Till the end of time. I am yours."

Draco watched as a single tear leaked out of her eye and he wiped it away gently with the pad of his thumb.

"I need you," she said, half on a sob.

"I'm here," he said and pulled her into his arms.

"I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you," she said into his chest. "You're like the second half of my heartbeat."

"You're every beat of mine," he answered back stroking her hair.

They stayed like that for several moments, just holding each other. Each one needed the strength that they seemed to draw from being close to each other. They each made the other stronger…better and after so much…they both needed a moment to just bask in the comfort of each other's arms.

"Draco?" Hermione asked breaking the silence.

"What?" he answered his hand stilling in her hair.

"What's with the tattoo?"

Draco pulled back.

He felt a lump build in his throat.

"I gave myself this tattoo a few days after my mother rescued me," said Draco.

"Its beautiful...but why?"

"Look closely," he said and stepped back.

She looked down at him and her finger sought out his skin. He trembled at her touch watching the curious expression on her face as she examined him.

He could see the moment she recognized her initials in the feathers. She looked up at him and he gave a slight nod, and then she was grabbing hold of him-her hand snaking behind his ears as she yanked his head down so that their lips met.

* * *

Her name was branded on his skin.

She couldn't get over it as she kissed him. The feel of his lips was everything; they were soft and yet his mouth was firm. She opened her mouth as she held his head captive between her fingers.

Draco answered the invitation and his mouth opened, matching her. She let her tongue dart out hesitantly to meet his soliciting a moan from Draco. His arms constricted around her and Hermione felt a small thrill knowing that he wanted her.

Hermione felt one of Draco's hands climb and fist in her hair and suddenly her head was being pulled back as his lips left her mouth and began to trail down her neck. Hermione trembled as her skin woke up under his touch, tingles jumping to the surface of her skin wherever he lingered long enough to kiss. He paused at the base of her neck where it sloped down towards her shoulder and kissed there letting his tongue dart out to taste her.

"Tell me you want this," he said into her skin.

"I want you," she answered immediately, automatically.

Draco pulled back to look at her. His grip easing in her hair so that she could drop her chin slightly to look at him.

"Do you want _**this**_ , though?" he said his eyes intense.

She could see the lust in them, being pushed to the back burner in favor for concern over what she actually wanted.

 _What do you want?_ Her mind questioned.

She had come here to be with him…

But did that mean she wanted to sleep with him?

 _Hell yes it does_ , her body seemed to scream at her. He was so close and everything about him made her want him. Not just the beautiful hard body and gentle face next to her but the heart and soul it housed.

 _He loves you,_ the part of her mind that was afraid told her. _There is nothing he wouldn't do for you. If you told him no, he wouldn't be mad. He would still love you if you said you wanted to wait._

That reassurance and the fact that he was asking now if she was okay made the decision easier for Hermione because it truly was her choice.

There was no pressure no demand: Only love.

While thinking her hands had fallen away and Draco had eased back from her, his hand falling down to the nape of her neck while the other rested gently at her waist.

Suddenly Draco was backing away from her and she realized that once again she had spent too much time in her own head and Draco had switched over to thinking the worst.

"I'm sorry," he said shaking his head. "I shouldn't have presumed. I just…" he shoved a hand through his hair. "I love you. I know you don't feel the same…you came here and…you're alive and I just got lost in it."

"Draco," she reached out for him.

"It's okay," he said shaking his head. "I just need a minute."

"Draco!" Hermione half yelled stopping him. She was not going to let any more miscommunications stand in between them.

"What?" asked Draco.

"I kissed you!" she said pointedly and stepped forward. "You aren't pushing your desires and wants on me. I feel the same way about you…" she swallowed the truth bubbling up inside her.

 _Say it, say it out loud,_ her mind ordered.

Hermione had never even allowed herself to say those three words inside her head about Draco. Being away from him these last weeks did nothing but made her feelings more obvious. She hadn't fallen for him in the manor because of being his captive…she had fallen for him because of the man he had become…the man who had saved her.

And now here he was weeks later…stronger. Telling her that while he had thought she was dead he was keeping a promise he had made to her in his mind to help her friends when she couldn't.

He was battling the dark for her even when she wasn't there to be his light.

How could she not love him?

He was everything.

Hermione watched as Draco took a hesitant step towards her.

"Draco…" she said his name in an almost pleading tone. "Please."

"Please what?" he asked coming to stand right next to her. He raised his hand and smoothed a lock of hair away from her face. "I've said it before…you can ask me for anything Hermione. Anything I can give I will. Everything I am is yours." He repeated that sentiment that made everything inside Hermione want to beam with joy and cry at the same time.

She wanted him for hers, for always.

"Then give me all of you," she said and kissed him again.

Draco kissed her back.

"You're sure?" he mumbled between kisses.

"Yes," she breathed back because she was. She knew down to her bones that she wanted this. She wanted him.

All of him.

Forever.

Draco's kisses became more insistent and a moment later Hermione found herself backed up against the wall caged in by his beautiful body. He pressed himself fully against her then and she felt his hardness between them. Her mind went to the dream she had, had about him at Hogwarts-the one where he had pressed her up against the stone pillar and worked her body until she came against his leg.

She let out a moan as his mouth met her neck again this time sucking on the flesh by her shoulder. Her hands dug into his shoulders and she felt a fine tremble go through her.

"You like that huh?" he asked, his voice was slightly breathy.

"Yes," she managed and arched into him. She felt Draco shudder and he ground his hips into her.

Heat pooled at Hermione's core.

It was so much better than a dream.

His skin was so warm and soft under her hands. She was happy that he was already shirtless so she could enjoy the beauty of his torso and the access to his flesh. Hermione leaned forward herself and pressed her lips to the base of Draco's neck mirroring his actions. She licked and sucked the skin there and she felt the rumble of approval in his throat.

As she kissed his neck she felt Draco's hands shift. While he kept her pinned against the wall with his hips he brought his hands up to her chest cupping her breasts over her shirt and bra. She left her nipples harden under the cups and wondered if he could tell through the light padding. Her breast felt suddenly heavy and achy beneath his hands.

It had never been like this with Viktor or Ron.

She had never felt this needy achy pull. When she was with them she had followed their lead and sometimes it felt kind of nice…but this…

She wanted to tear the remainder of Draco's clothes off and claw at him to alleviate the growing ache.

Draco's hands dropped from her breasts and immediately Hermione wanted them back. She let out a small sound of protest in the back of her throat.

Draco gave her a wry and knowing smile and for a moment Hermione was reminded that he had more experience in this than she did. Lots more if his reputation around school had, had any truth to it.

His hands went down to the hem of her shirt and combined with that last thought she suddenly felt shy. Here Draco was in front of her, all bare chested and cut muscles…and she was just…herself. He lifted the hem upwards and she raised her arms automatically-letting it happen more than wanting it too. She turned her head away not wanting to see if the first look from him was disappointment.

"Hey," said Draco and he took hold her chin gently and turned her head back to him. "You know you can tell me to stop at any point and I will."

"It's not that," she said shaking her head. She did however like the reassurance.

"Then what is it?"

"It's just…" she felt her cheeks flame. "I mean look at you!"

Draco shifted back.

"Okay?" Draco frowned.

Hermione let out an exasperated snort.

"You're gorgeous, you're handsome and you're fit as fuck and I'm just…" she gestured to herself.

"Oh hell no," said Draco. "You are not being self-depreciating. You are the most beautiful woman in the world to me Hermione." He stepped forward and kissed her soundly until she found herself breathless and then he stepped back again. Her arms shot out to stop him, but he evaded them easily.

"Look again," said Draco. "What else do you see?"

Hermione blinked, not sure what she was supposed to be looking for and then he was reaching out and taking hold of her hand and placing it over his heart on the beautiful wing of the Phoenix tattoo: the one with her initials in its feathers.

"You…" he said. "You're in my heart and you're on my skin. Don't ever think for a single second that I see you as less than fucking perfect."

"But I'm not perfect," she protested. "I'm human and I make mistakes and I'm too stubborn."

Draco kissed her again his hands running up and down her sides until she was shivering.

"You're still perfect to me," he said when he broke the kiss. He pressed his forehead to hers. "And yes, you are god-awfully stubborn, but it's one of the things I love about you even if it is sometimes infuriating as all hell." He kissed her nose and then shifted back. "You're my everything…" he let his gaze flicker down and then his hands came up and covered her breasts over her bra. "And even if you weren't….this is still a great rack."

Hermione let out a small laugh and rolled her eyes.

"Okay," she said closing her eyes for a moment and rubbing her forehead against him.

"Okay," he said and pulled her in close for a hug.

Hermione closed her eyes and welcomed the warmth of him.

She felt safe.

She always wanted to feel this way.

"We don't have to keep going," said Draco giving her a gentle squeeze, though the hardness between them told her how much he wanted to.

"I want to," said Hermione "It's just…"

"A little fast?" asked Draco.

"No."

"Then what?"

"I really don't know what I'm doing."

Her words hung in the air for a moment and she felt Draco shift and then he slowly pulled back from the hug in order to be able to look her in the eyes.

"Are you worried I'm going to be comparing you to the people I've slept with before?" asked Draco frowning.

"Well I wasn't, but now that you mention it," said Hermione and she felt her cheeks heat.

"Don't" he said sharply. "None of them meant anything even close to what you mean to me." He touched her cheek gently. "I don't care if you don't have a lot of experience," said Draco. "I'm happy just to be able to be with you, to get to touch you." She could hear that he meant every word and see it in his face.

A little of her worry slipped away.

He really did love her.

"Well good," she said and then admitted: "Because I don't have…experience."

Draco hesitated and Hermione watched as he took in her words.

"You mean you don't have **_much_** experience," said Draco.

"No…." Hermione was sure she was going red as a bloody tomato. This conversation was getting far too awkward. She wanted to grab her shirt and haul it back on and crawl away.

"Hermione," Draco reached for her holding her as if she might break.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize," he ordered his voice firm.

"But I made it awkward."

"Fuck, I don't care about that…" he said somewhat exasperated, then he gentled clearly worried how it it had come off to her. "I mean I care that you seem to be bothered and I don't want you to be upset…" he seemed to be searching for words.

She suddenly wanted to reassure him, let him know that it was okay, that it wasn't his fault.

"I don't know how to do this Draco," she covered her face with her hands feeling embarrassed for even bringing it up.

 _You started this you have to finish it, you promised no more miscommunications._

"I'm sorry I…I don't know what I'm doing….at all." She admitted the words coming tumbling out.

 _Just say it dammit,_ she ordered herself. _Its better that he knows._

 _He'll understand._

 _But I don't want him to get all noble and lose him over it._

 _He loves you..._

Her heartbeat raced inside her chest and she looked up at him.

"I've never done this before…." she said softly. "With anyone… Ever."

* * *

 **Yes it's a cliff-hanger but I swear I'm not trying to be a dick. I want to give a really nice and in depth and emotionally charged scene for when Draco and Hermione get together physically. I don't plan on glossing over things. Hopefully you will thank me for that decision next chapter.**

 **On a similar note, about my choice to make it that Hermione is a virgin… I consider myself very sex-positive and don't think Hermione 'Needs" to be a virgin, however, I didn't see things as going super far with Viktor (though they may have done a little) and Ron and he never really "Got together" by this point in the books/movies…so I'm writing her this way because to me it's what makes sense. And as far as Draco having experience well…that's the Draco I'm writing in this fic because it's what makes sense in my head for him.**

 **Hope you enjoyed the steamy sections of this chapter and how everything else panned out for Narcissa finding out and how Draco handled it. If you enjoyed this chapter please share some love in a review.**


	48. Chapter 46: The Three Words

**Wow 1000 Reviews. I am blown away. I NEVER expected to get that much of a response or that big of a following.**

 **Thank you to everyone who helped make that happen and thank you to the people who commented this week: PhoebeMyring,** RotcehM, LovEToReadit, Jen7, Ayr, inkwolf199, CatPeach, GMGaby, mmiller0000 . ALIASTESIN , IanAlphaAxel, jacpin2002, dezibear57, tomfeltonswifey, HumbleHuffle , WeAllFallDown2003, dancerdollar, TripleLLL,youngar994, Aid4, Fireheart394, mega700201, apls79, dezibear57, alluringmango **and the guests** "D", "Who" "Daniel" "Gabs" "Sila" and "Guest" **You all rock.**

 **Remember how I said I said I wanted to give an in-dept and emotionally charged telling of Draco and Hermione getting together. Well Here is 8.5k worth of them getting started and taking the first steps together. I don't want to rush or gloss over anything here either. So I hope you enjoy my choices and enjoy this chapter.**

* * *

Chapter 46: The Three Words

A virgin.

 _Holy fuck._

Draco felt his heart beat slam inside his ribs as he reeled with the shock of a revelation.

 _You don't live in the fifteenth century Draco stop making a big deal of it._

Draco immediately was thrown back in time as he remembered HIS first time…and how he was scared shitless that he would make a complete fool of himself. He had fumbled and stumbled and made silly mistakes not knowing what he was doing and the whole time-even though he had wanted it so bad- he had felt nervous.

 _That's how she's probably feeling now,_ he told himself. Draco was at a loss of what to do and how to handle this.

At Hogwarts, one of his conquests had been a virgin. That Particular Slytherin Girl had treated her virginity like it wasn't a big deal at all, and Draco had been cool with that. His mother had hammered it into his head repeatedly that a woman's body was her own and that he didn't have any right to decide what mattered to them and what didn't.

Looking down at Hermione he knew that it mattered to her.

 _Fuck, what if I screw it up?_ He found himself wondering.

 _You can't be serious,_ he told himself. _If it matters so much to her you can't let her throw it away on you,_ the darker part of his mind ordered.

 _I love her,_ the part that was devoted to Hermione completely said gently within his mind. _If I love her is the right thing to do to tell her to wait for someone else…or is the right thing to do to let her make the decision for herself?_

"Draco say something…" said Hermione softly and he saw that her eyes were filling with tears.

 _Shit, shit, shit._

"Hermione…" he couldn't think of anything to say. His mind was still churning over the new information as he tried to process it so he said the only thing that came into his head: "Don't cry."

"I'm not crying," she said wiping the tears away from her eyes before they could spill out.

"Okay…" Draco blinked. He didn't want to argue with her. He knew that right now the last thing she probably wanted was to argue about the moisture collecting in her eyes.

Draco took a breath "Just give me a second."

"It's not a big deal, you can forget I said it and we can just go back to…" she gestured between them. "And I'll just follow along and…"

"Nah-ah," said Draco shaking his head. "There is no world in which I am going to forget this conversation and finding out this…is…would be your first time." He swallowed as thoughts began to come together properly again. He looked down at her.

"I don't believe that you can look me in the eye and tell me honestly that this doesn't mean something to you," he touched her shoulder gently. "You may be a practical and intelligent witch Hermione but I know…you're also a giant softie inside."

"It's stupid," she said looking away.

Draco reached out with his other hand and grabbed hold of her upper arms.

"It's not stupid," he said and ducked down forcing her to look at him. "Look at me, it's not stupid. It's okay to care about it and want it to be a big deal and special."

"But I don't want it to be fake," said Hermione and he heard her voice crack with what sounded like a cross between frustration and confusion. "I don't want rose petals on a bed and all that cheesy stuff I just want to…" she bit her lip.

"You just want to what Hermione?" he asked.

"I want it to be special because I want it to be with someone I love…and someone who loves me."

Draco's heart stuttered.

"Someone you love," it felt like gears were grinding in his head.

 _Someone she loves._

 _Someone she loves? Then why was she starting with me?_

The words were making his head spin.

 _She doesn't love me…_

 _She can't love me._

 _Not after everything I have done…_

 _Does that mean she wants to stop?_

 _But she just said she wanted to keep going…_

"Tell me again that you love me Draco," he voice had a soft edge to it so that the words were more pleading rather than an order or a demand. How could she not know? Why did she need to hear it again?

It didn't matter he would say it a million times if she asked him to.

He would say it every day for the rest of his life if she wanted him to…if she would let him.

 _Why does she want to hear it?_

"I do," he said reaching out for her. He felt half-numb.

"Say it," this time it was a command. He obeyed.

"I love you."

There was a pause.

"I love you too."

Time stopped for Draco.

The whole universe was suspended for a moment.

Words had never meant more to him in his entire life than right then…those words coming from her lips….

 _She just said she loves me…_

 _She can't love me._

 _I have to be dreaming._

 _She can't mean it._

Draco reached back and dug his nails into his shoulder with one hand feeling the sharp bite of them as he pressed almost hard enough to break skin.

 _You're not dreaming…_

 _She just told you she loves you._

 _She can't mean it._

He wanted her to mean it. He wanted her to mean it more than he wanted anything else in that moment.

"Tell me you mean it," the words passed barely audibly through his lips. His hands went up to cup her face. "Tell me you mean it," he said louder and there was a rush of blood in his ears and he felt his fingertips tingling oddly. "Merlin tell me you mean it."

"I do," she said. "I don't know why it took me so long to realize it."

"Things have been complicated," said Draco feeling light headed.

"You look like you're about to pass out," said Hermione.

"I kinda feel like it," he said and dragged her over to the bed tumbling down on it with her so that they were laying facing one another.

Draco wrapped her in his arms holding her close to him.

He didn't want to let go not now, not ever.

Her head tucked in against his chest and he felt her fingers curl against his pectoral as she leaned into the embrace welcoming it around her.

"Your heart is pounding," said Hermione.

"That happens when you get life altering news delivered," managed Draco, though he wasn't sure how. His brain felt fried.

"Life altering news?" Hermione lifted her head.

"Yeah," said Draco. "Finding out the woman you love who you thought...you thought had died saving your life is actually alive and then hearing her say that she loves you back is kind of the definition of life altering."

Hermione let out a quiet laugh.

"Okay, fair," she said and snuggled into Draco. "I like this," she said. "Being here with you just like this."

"I like it too," said Draco and he kissed the top of her head. "I'll like it more when my heart stops trying to tap out a military jig in my chest."

This time Hermione laughed for real and Draco found himself smiling in spite of himself.

Was he allowed to be happy?

After everything he had done…after all the hell that he had been through…had he made enough amends?

 _Not yet, but I will…I'm trying,_ he thought to himself.

 _I'll keep getting better until I become a man she can have stand at her side._

But what about now?

Was he allowed to love Hermione AND let her love him back?

* * *

Hermione lay in the safe circle of Draco's arms and listened to his heart beat slowly return to normal

"So…" said Draco taking a deep breath.

"So," answered Hermione.

"Do we get to be together?"

Hermione's heart squeezed at the vulnerability she heard in Draco's voice.

"I want all of you," he said quietly. "If I have to have you only in the shadows away from your friends I'll take it. I'd understand if you don't want me around them... but I want all of you. Always Hermione."

"I'm not ashamed of you Draco," she said her head shooting up so she could look at him. "I'm not going to relegate you to the shadows. Right now I am a little ashamed of some of my friends and how they have been acting," she added with a frown.

"They do have the self-righteous gene in flagrant abundance," said Draco with a small chuckle. Hermione smacked him playfully on the shoulder and Draco grabbed hold of her hand and then switched their positions so that he was on top, pinning her beneath him.

Hermione let out a small yelp and then smiled up at him.

He held her wrists captive on either side of her head as he looked down at her.

"God you are so fucking beautiful," he said and bent his head down to kiss her.

Hermione blushed as she answered his kiss. This one was different…slower…soft. She let out a small sigh as she felt it warm her from her fingertips to her toes. He kept kissing her, gentle brushes of lips against her, and then his tongue ran against the seam of her lips. She opened her mouth only to have him pull back and then sweep a gentle kiss on the corner of her mouth.

Hermione felt herself getting restless. That ache she had felt before was coming back with a vengeance and she wanted to move.

She flexed against Draco's hold and he didn't move. Heat rushed in response. She was trapped beneath him, and while it should have scared her to be in this position she found her body responding because she wanted him.

There was a kind of thrill at being his captive without actually being captive anymore.

Draco shifted as she squirmed and pressed his hips against her pinning her whole body to the mattress.

Hermione swallowed and closed her eyes as she felt his hard length against her pelvis.

She let out a small moan and her body tried to simultaneously move away and get closer. Every movement she made only made her more aware of him and how close he was and how hot and hard that member was against her.

She trembled as he finally gave her the kiss she was aching for, his tongue slipping into her mouth to meet her. She moaned into him. She didn't know kissing could be like this-light her whole body on fire. She wanted more, she wanted faster, harder, but Draco was taking it slow and that only made her body crave each caress more.

"Draco," she said his name like a plea.

"Yes?" he asked and she noted his voice had a rough quality to it that had her body answering with a small clench of muscles deep within her.

"Please," she said not knowing how to ask for what she wanted, not knowing exactly what it was she wanted, only knowing that she wanted more.

"Please what?" he asked and she heard the humor in his voice, a gentle edge that let her know he knew what she meant.

He knew what she wanted.

"More," she said. "I want more."

"Greedy little witch," he teased as his mouth moved to her throat. "I like that," he gave her a little nip and Hermione's hips bucked despite being held against him. The result had them both letting out little sounds of pleasure.

 _He wants you too,_ she reminded herself and she rubbed purposefully against him soliciting a sound from the back of Draco's throat.

She felt his hands flex over her wrists squeezing tight enough that it was almost painful.

She loved it.

She loved knowing she could make him forget for a moment and lose control.

It lasted only a moment though and she found Draco back at her neck, this time sucking and licking trailing down to her collar bone. She trembled as he began kissing lower.

She wanted his mouth on her chest.

She wanted it so badly.

Her nipples were hard beneath her bra and her breasts were almost sore with the desire to be touched. Draco kissed the small line between her breasts and paused there turning his head to listen to her heartbeat.

"I think that might be my favorite sound in the world," he said looking up at her.

Hermione felt her heart squeeze.

How had he become someone who could say words that touched her heart like that? How was it that Draco Malfoy was here in bed with her touching her in ways she had never been touched and making her want him more than breath itself?

It was more than physical. It wasn't just that he was hot and she was horny…it was that he was…this incredible man who loved her and was touching her in a way that made her feel like she was the only woman in the world.

Draco released her hands and shifted them so that they were both sitting. Then he reached around behind her and undid the clasp of her bra with one hand, reminding her that this wasn't his first time, before leaning her back down on the bed.

She missed the warmth of his body pressing up against her. She wanted to feel his hardness again, but he kept his hips away from her as he began kissing her one more.

He started at her neck once more and by the time he made it to the space between her breasts her body was trembling with the want.

Her now free hands held onto the pillow above her head clinging to it as the anticipation built.

He paused and she could feel the soft warmth of his breath brushing against the sensitive skin. Pin prickles rose up turning the skin on her arms to gooseflesh. And then he dipped his head down and captured her nipple between his lips laving it with his tongue.

Hermione bowed.

Fuck, it felt so good.

He kissed and suckled her nipple until she was squirming with pleasure beneath his ministrations and then he stopped and she let out a little cry of protest only to find him on the other breast giving it the same attention.

Hermione's legs moved restlessly against the bed sheets as he ran his tongue over her nipple. Every flick of his tongue sent little spikes of pleasure through her…shooting down to her core and making her squirm and clench at the unfulfilled desire there.

He pulled back and kissed her maneuvering himself up her body so that he could touch her breast at the same time as he claimed her mouth. The added sensation was like a bomb going off in her head. She went from thinking about what Draco was doing, and enjoying his kiss while the other was on her breast, to a mindless chant of want within her.

Hermione moaned as he cupped and squeezed her. He ran his hand over her breast kneading her flesh gently. She rocked into his touch wanting more, never wanting him to stop.

She felt the moisture that had been growing from his touch get an added rush and soak through her panties as he kept up the work.

He punched her nipple between his thumb and forefinger and she let out a small cry. The jolt of it sent a sharp stab of arousal to her already trembling core.

"Draco!" she called his name.

He answered by moving back down her body. He shifted so that his hand was on her other breast while his mouth latched on to her nipple where his fingers had just pinched. He nipped her gently and her back bowed. Her hands came down soundly on his shoulders almost in a slap and her fingers curled into his flesh leaving little crescent moons in their wake.

Draco let out an approving grunt and kept up his work until she felt nearly mindless with it. Everything narrowed down to his touch.

His hand left her breast and Hermione wanted to protest until she found it at her core rubbing her in slow circled through her jeans. The friction was incredible. Her hips bucked into his touch while his moUth continued to savor her breast. She felt the tension coiling inside her tighter and tighter and then Draco bit her nipple and she came crying out, hips writhing, grinding her center into his hand as he kept moving it in those maddening circles until she finally came down.

Hermione shuddered.

"I changed my mind," said Draco coming to lay on his side, his head on the pillow next to her. "I think _**that**_ might be my favourite sound in the world."

Hermione managed a laugh closing her eyes as she dealt with the flood of emotions that had tagged along for a ride on the back of her climax.

Everything she had been going through the last few weeks without him came rushing back to her and she felt tears prick at the back of her eyes.

"I don't want to be without you," she said softly.

"You never have to worry about that," said Draco gathering her up into his arms.

Hermione buried her face in his chest.

"I don't know why I'm getting so emotional," she said on a sniff. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," said Draco rubbing her back in soothing motions. "Don't apologize." He kissed her gently. "I want all of you Hermione," he said gently. "I love all of you."

That pushed her over the edge and Hermione burst into tears.

Draco held her until he tears subsided. He stoked her hair and back until everything finished pouring out from inside her and she fell asleep.

* * *

Narcissa wandered the streets of Paris for several hours while she thought.

She stayed amid the muggles and away from the magical ally's knowing that the muggle world provided more protection for her at the moment.

Voldemort would have her neck.

The deatheaters and snatchers were probably out looking for her right now.

Narcissa continued to walk. Her mind a buzz with what her life had become.

Her son was in love with a muggle born.

She looked at the people passing by.

 _Are we all really do different?_ She found herself wondering and then dismissed the thought.

 _Of course we are different you could destroy this entire block and everyone here before they could summon the police._

And yet so could any muggle with the right weapons.

 _The ability to destroy isn't the measure of their worthiness,_ her mind said and she felt bad for even thinking of it.

Narcissa found herself at the front steps of Musée de l'Orangerie, not far from where the Louvre. Her feet took her up the steps and she paid the woman at the desk for a ticket and walked up the white ramp into the round room.

They called it the round room, but the reality was that it was more of an oval. There were hallways on the far end leading to a second room of the same shape creating an infinity loop.

 _Why am I here?_ She thought to herself.

She knew the answer: Paris had always been a place she liked to visit and this was one of the few places she had never been before. She had heard it was a peaceful place…so here she was…seeking peace amid the turmoil of her war-torn life.

Narcissa sat on the bench amid the muggles and looked out at the water lilies. The classic paintings that moved so many and drew in a daily crowd of tourists and artists alike.

She saw teenagers from all across the world taking selfies in front of the paintings and she watched them wondering what it was like to live a life without magic.

Did they know that a piece was missing from their world?

"Why are you crying?" asked a little girl who couldn't be more than ten. She was careful to keep her voice quiet. There was a softness to this place which everyone seemed to respect. A quiet peaceful solemnness not unlike a church.

Narcissa reached up and touched her cheeks to find that she was indeed crying.

"I don't know," Narcissa answered the little girl, honestly. She had a million things to think about and worries all around, and here she was-a woman who never let her emotions rule her-crying openly in public.

"It's okay," the little girl said patting Narcissa's shoulder. "My mommy says that art is like that sometimes. It makes you feel so much sometimes it has to come out through your eyes."

Narcissa forced a smile.

"I've always wanted to come see them, ever since I was three years old," said the little girl sitting down close to Narcissa and looking up at her with big innocent eyes. "Mommy said I liked Monet since the first moment I saw his pictures. I think she's right because I don't remember ever not loving him. He's my favourite." Her little legs swung gently not touching the floor.

"Is he now?" managed Narcissa as she used a handkerchief from her bag to wipe away the tears and pull herself together.

"Yup. His paintings are special. They are like….like the best version of what things could look like." The little girl's voice rose a little and then she looked around clearly worried she had been too loud and spoke more softly so that Narcissa felt like the little girl was letting her in on a secret.

"When you look up close," she said pointing towards the nearest painting with her tiny hand. "He has all these big blobs of colour but then when you step back they become the flowers on the pond. It's like magic. One minute it's just little splotches and then the next minute it's this whole big beautiful world."

"What did you say?" asked Narcissa.

"That it's a big beautiful world," the little girl repeated.

"Before that," said Narcissa

"Oh…" said the little girl scrunching her face up in concentration. "Oh that it's like magic!"

"Sarah," and older woman took hold of the little girls arm. "You don't disturb the people here. I told you if you wanted to see Monet's painting you had to behave yourself," she looked up at Narcissa. "I'm so sorry."

"It's alright," said Narcissa. "Please don't be cross with her. She helped me see something I never saw before."

The woman looked down at her daughter and her grip on the girl changed, softening. She slid her hand down from Sarah's arm and took hold of her little hand.

"Come along Sarah," the woman said gently. "We have to meet your father."

"Bye," said the little girl waving at Narcissa.

Narcissa found herself waving back and then she stood and moved into the second room. Like the first it was naturally lit and housed four paintings each a different set of the water lilies. It was near closing and so Narcissa watched as the crowds thinned out slightly with the dying light.

The little girl was right.

This muggle man's art made thousands of people happy every day. He had gifted the paintings to the people of Paris, which was why they did not move from this magnificent building which had been built for the sole purpose of housing his great works.

There was a magic in the way he painted, but more than that there was a magic in how they could constantly bring people joy.

It was a magic that could not be replicated with a wand.

When the guard came up to her and gently told her in French that it was time to go Narcissa knew she had to go back to her son.

If loving a muggle born woman was what made her son happy…then she would not stand in the way of that kind of magic.

* * *

As reluctant as Draco was to leave Hermione's side, he had to eat. His stomach was growling loud enough that he was worried he would wake her with the grumbled alone.

She's so fucking beautiful, he thought as he looked at her. The sounds she had made, the way she had responded to his touch had driven him wild inside and out. He would savor the sound of her first climax with him forever in his memory even though he planned on making it happen again and again there was something special about first.

 _I want to make her first special,_ he found himself thinking and then his mind went to other places. He didn't want to hurt her…

Draco's stomach growled again and he closed his eyes enjoying the feel of their bare torso pressed together.

He carefully extracted himself from her grip. She curled in of herself and Draco carefully covered her with a sheet knowing it's what she would want.

He tiptoed away and made his way downstairs to the kitchen.

His mother sitting waiting for him at the table.

Draco's back stiffened preparing for a fight.

"I'm not giving her up," said Draco defensively.

"I am not going to ask you to," she answered and Draco blinked.

"What?" he looked at his mother with surprise.

"You love her. I can see it in your eyes and I…I love you Draco," she said standing and coming around the table towards him. "I want you to be happy."

 _Is she really going to accept this?_

 _Will she…let me be with Hermione?_

His mother couldn't and wouldn't be able to stop him from being with Hermione, but he wanted Narcissa to be okay with this. He wanted to keep both of the women he loved in his life. He didn't want to have to choose.

"She's an incredible witch mom," he said his shoulders letting go of some of their tension.

"It's not her abilities with a magic or a wand that have changed my mind Draco," said Narcissa coming a little closer. "It's the fact that she loves you and was willing to die for you. I don't care that she's an incredible witch I care that she's an incredible woman." Narcissa straightened. "She went through things that no one should have to go through, some of those things were at your hand and yet she has forgiven them and sought no revenge. Which is more than I think I would be able to do."

"You're an incredible woman yourself mom," said Draco knowing that Narcissa had endured more than she had ever let him see in order to keep her family safe…in order to keep him safe.

Narcissa gave a small smile.

"I love you very much Draco," she said it as if she needed to convince him of it. As if he had forgotten her love. It made Draco's heart twist and clench in his chest.

"I know mom," he said and he opened his arms knowing she wanted to hug him while also knowing that his mother would not be the first one to make the move. She wouldn't risk the rejection.

Narcissa came forward stepping into Draco's open arms.

She wrapped her arms around him and Draco squeezed her tight. It felt like it had been ages since his mother had held him.

"I want you to be happy," she said into his shoulder.

"She makes me happy," said Draco softly.

"Then I will accept your choice to be with her."

Draco pulled back to look at his mother and realized she was dead serious.

His mother, who had always hated and looked down on people like Hermione was not going to try and stand in the way of him being with the woman he loved.

Draco felt like a giant weight had been lifted off of his shoulders.

"Thank you," he said sincerely and hugged her again this time squeezing her tighter. "You don't know how much that means to me to hear you say that."

Narcissa pulled back and gave a tight nod and Draco could see that she was at the end of her strength; at the limit of her patience and flexibility.

She was trying to do what she thought was right and it was tearing her up inside because it was at odds with everything she had been raised and had raised him to be.

Still, her love for her son was greater than the prejudice she had been weaned on.

"I am going to go now," said Narcissa. "We need some more supplies…and some food if we are going to be accommodating one more."

Draco didn't point out that it was getting late. He knew his mother wanted an excuse to get out of the house. Knew that she needed some space and time to herself and she was being courteous enough to not kick them out and to instead step out of the way herself. He appreciated the gesture and helped his mother save face by not acknowledging that he knew exactly what she was doing and why.

"Be safe," he said.

Narcissa raised her chin.

"I will be fine," she said a little haughtily, and vanished.

 _"I will accept your choice to be with her"_

His mother's words rang in his ears. It wasn't everything, but it was one hell of a big step in the right direction. Draco felt a smile tug at the corner of his mouth. Maybe there was hope for the three of them being a family.

 _A family…_

The word 'Family' was changing its meaning inside Draco's head.

He had always associated family with duty, responsibility and obligation.

Now he was thinking of it in terms of…love. People who stuck together because of the love they had for one another.

 _You've gone and become a total softie_ , he told himself with an eye roll and turned to the cupboard to whipped up a quick meal with what little was there.

 _There are worse things to be,_ he said smiling inwardly.

Draco carried the meal back up to the room along with some orange juice.

Hermione sat up in bed when he returned, pulling the sheet up higher over her breasts. He was sad for the lack of a view, but understood her being shy. He was glad he had covered her before going downstairs.

"Where did you go?" she asked quietly.

"I got us some food," he said setting down the tray. "And I talked with my mother."

He watched Hermione's face fall and saw her pull the sheet tighter.

 _Way to kill the mood Malfoy,_ he told himself.

 _It's important she know._

He knew the witch in front of him would be worried about what had happened between him and his mother and she had every right to be. Narcissa was a scary mother bear when it came to her son and anyone who dared come between them or tried to harm her cub.

"How is she?" asked Hermione.

"She has decided that she will support my decision," said Draco.

"Your decision?" asked Hermione confused.

"My decision to be with you," said Draco.

"Oh…."colour flushed Hermione's skin and a small hopeful smile pulled at her lips "Really?"

"Yes," said Draco. He was very happy to know that his mother's approval was a positive thing in Hermione's eyes. After everything that had happened he was worried that Hermione might have held Narcissa in the same regard as the other more sinister people from the manor.

"I'm glad," said Hermione. "I know she loves you very much."

"You two apparently have that in common," said Draco a little teasingly and then because he really wanted to hear it he asked. "Will you say it again please?"

It was clear from the look on her face that Hermione knew exactly what he was asking for.

She smiled softly and swallowed.

"I love you," she said and scootched to the edge of the bed coming around to touch his face with one hand while holding the sheet to cover her with the other. "I love you," she repeated and kissed him.

Draco wrapped his arms around her savoring the softness of her skin.

He loved hearing those words coming from her lips. The sound of those simple syllables rolled over his skin like a healing balm making everything in the world right for a moment.

Those three words meant everything to him because SHE was his everything.

He kissed her harder. She responded happily meeting his passion and Draco found himself taking over the kiss he stood and lifted her back onto the bed.

"What about the food?" asked Hermione.

"Later," said Draco.

* * *

Later.

There was so much promise in that one word.

Hermione felt the butterflies begin to storm inside her stomach as Draco kissed her again. Even though he had just paid attention to her chest before the nap she found herself craving more contact there.

She wanted his hands on her, his mouth.

His mouth made her feel such wonderful things.

She felt the heat start to grow again at her core as memories of his lips on her breasts had her flushing with arousal.

"This sheet is in the way," said Draco tugging at it gently. He bent his head down and nipped at her lips. "Do you mind if I move it?"

"No…"

"No?"

"No I don't mind," she said and he smiled at her and moved the sheet away. He went to work on her again, his lips and hands moving over her. Only this time he wasn't quite as slow as before. There was a little more urgency in his touch and she felt a flicker of worry rear its head as his hands went to the front button of her jeans.

She closed her eyes and told her brain to shut up and tried to focus just on the feel.

Draco pulled the zipper down and then paused.

"What?" she asked looking at him and wondering why he had stopped.

"Are you good?" he asked.

"I'm fine."

"You look like you're braced for impact headed on a collision course," said Draco pulling back. She could hear the concern in his voice.

"I'm not, I swear I'm good. I want this, I'm just nervous." She was more than just a little nervous she felt like her whole body was a rubber bad pulled painfully tight about to snap back.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" asked Draco sincerely.

"Kiss me again, I forget how scary the world is when you kiss me."

Draco obliged and kissed her. He settled down beside her and pulled her onto her side with him and then he kept kissing her, his hand stroking up and down her back in a soothing motion as he did. It didn't take long before Hermione felt herself relax.

After a few moments the hand at her back started to make her skin shiver.

What had felt soothing had turned into something arousing.

She wanted that hand elsewhere.

Hermione arched into Draco and found herself shifting a leg over his hip to press closer. As soon as she did she felt the long hard evidence of his arousal pressed up to her core.

She shuddered.

It felt so good.

The layers she was wearing suddenly felt like too much.

Draco moved his hand from around her back and brought it to her chest squeezing her breast he began to toy with her nipple. He rolled it between his fingers gently and then began to brush the pad of his thumb over her nipple in a relentless rhythm.

"Fuck," she managed and turned her head away from his mouth as she felt the arousal spike in her.

"My little Hermione Granger, swearing," said Draco. His voice was throaty and extremely sexy and when Hermione met his gaze his pupils were dark and round drawing her in.

"I want you," she said, half mindless with it.

"I want you too," said Draco and he kissed her. He shifted their positions slightly and his hand moved from her breast down to her jeans slipping down over the open front and underneath her panties. His fingers found the slick flesh that ached for his touch.

"Fuck Hermione you're so wet," he said and she felt his mouth land on her throat.

He ran a finger along her cleft, his movements somewhat hampered by the clothes. He kissed her neck and she felt him slide back up as if navigating her body and then his fingers landed on the tight bundle of nerves and she let out a cry.

"There we are," he said gently into her ear and he began stroking across her aching flesh.

"Draco," she called out his name.

His fingers continued to stroke and play until she was half wild with it and then he pulled back.

"No," she moaned in protest at the lack of contact.

"Just give me a sec," he said and began working her jeans off her hips. Hermione felt another flare of nerves.

She had never been naked with a guy before.

Draco seemed to sense the return of her nerves and when he was finished pulling her jeans and underwear off he pulled her back close so that they were facing each other. He kept his eyes averted as if knowing that she was afraid of being seen in that moment. He kissed her and she knew it was because she had told him that his kisses made her forget the madness of the world.

He listened to her.

He heard her and she knew he was doing everything he could to be everything she needed.

 _It's so much pressure…trying to make things perfect…_ she found herself thinking.

She didn't want to make him worry.

She didn't want him to be worried about her while they were together like this.

She felt her anxiety building again.

"I love you," he said between kisses. "I love you. Let me love you."

The words soothed Hermione.

She nodded and Draco's fingers drifted back down her body.

He slipped between the slick folds of her sex and ran a finger along her entrance before returning to her clit. Hermione closed her eyes trying to focus on only the sensation. As he rubbed her there he kissed her and she felt that duel attention start to make her brain go foggy. She felt herself relax and as soon as she did the pleasure began to build again and a new type of tension began to rise at her center.

He stroked her a few times across the length of her slit, his fingers sliding against the silky flesh there until her legs began to part of their own accord and then he shifted so that his thumb was on her clit while he slowly inserted his index finger into her.

She moaned at the invading digit.

"You're so tight," he said on a half groan himself. "Fuck I'd have hurt you if you hadn't told me."

"Told you?" Hermione asked on a half moan.

"That this is your first," he said still stroking her.

Thoughts were hard to hold onto under the steady slide of his finger within her working in time with that thumb that was sending tingles all through her.

"It always hurts the first time," said Hermione saying the first coherent thought that came into her head.

"Yeah, well it hurts less if you're body is prepared for it…and Hermione, I'm not exactly small," said Draco. Hermione felt her inner muscles clench around Draco's finger as his words and Draco answered with a groan kissing her.

"Fuck you feel good," he said. "I want to be inside you so bad."

"I want that too," said Hermione and she knew it was true. She was aching for him.

Draco kissed her as he slowly inserted another finger. Hermione felt the stretch. She moaned.

She felt full, it felt good.

He stroked her clit again and scissored his fingers inside her.

The orgasm took her unexpectedly. It was a sharp and bright and white like light. It almost hurt to clamp around him so suddenly and violently. Her body locked curling forward she shook with the force of it.

She cried out and bit his shoulder as she shook.

He stroked and pushed his fingers in her pushing deeper. She felt her muscles convulse anew as the spasms which had started to die down leapt up again making her cry out as the orgasm continued longer than she had dealt with before on her own.

He kept touching her and stroking until it all became too much.

She needed a break.

She needed to breathe.

She was seeing stars.

She hadn't been prepared for the climax.

Draco's hands weren't stopping though and she felt like her skin was going to crawl off her body. She gripped his shoulders her fingers digging in.

"Too much," she finally managed. "Too much."

Draco stilled.

"Okay," he said and slowly extracted his fingers from her center.

The muscles contracted at the loss and she twitched.

"It's okay, I've got you," he said.

"I'm okay. I'm okay. I swear I'm not going to cry on you this time. It's just…It feels like a system overload," she managed and was suddenly worried that he wouldn't understand.

"It's okay" he said and kissed her gently shifting their positions. "That can be a good thing sometimes, losing control when you get past system overload" said Draco kissing her nose. "But let's take it slow this time."

He held her for a long moment and Hermione was thankful that he wasn't trying to touch or sooth her since her skin felt too alive and too sensitive. A few moments later that sensation began to dull and she finally felt herself relax into a post-orgasm calm.

Draco shifted and sat up somewhat stiffly and Hermione realized that he hadn't had any relief yet while she had finished twice.

"What about you?" she asked.

"What about me?" asked Draco, he cleaned off his hand and brought the food over to the bed holding up a bit of bread with jam before her mouth.

Hermione accepted her and ate. She hadn't realized how hungry she was.

"I mean…it's been kind of one sided."

"No it hasn't" said Draco. "I've gotten to touch you. I'm happy."

"But you haven't had…a…"

"Orgasm?" Draco finished for her raising an eyebrow. "Despite popular belief It's not all about that you know," said Draco taking a bite of his own food. "And besides I'm probably going to make an utter fool of myself and finish like a rocket when I finally get to be inside you because your body drives me mad and you're so fucking tight its gunna…" Draco took a sharp inhale and closed his eyes. "I want to make sure it's good for you long before I get inside."

"Oh…" said Hermione.

"Yeah," said Draco giving her a smile. "Besides I also want to make sure your first time is not the horror story I've heard so many girls complain about."

"If it's with you could never be a horror story," said Hermione touching his face. "Because I love you."

"I love you too," he said turning his face so that his lips met the palm of her hand. "I am actually glad I know a little bit about what I am doing though because…even if you love someone the first time can be awkward as hell."

"Personal experience?" Hermione asked. She was suddenly gripped by curiosity. Even though they had fallen in love and knew each other on a core level there was still so much that she didn't know about Draco's past and his life. She had seen flashes of it when she had been inside his head, but it wasn't the same as him opening up and sharing those little pieces and stories with her because he wanted to.

"You're the only woman I have ever loved," Draco said matter-of-factly. "So no… but also…yes." He took a breath and drank some orange juice handing Hermione a glass. She took it drinking it down quickly while waiting for Draco to elaborate.

"My first time was awkward," said Draco and she saw a hint of colour creep into his cheeks. "I know I fumbled around like an ass. Pretty much every guy does the first time, or so I'm told," he gave her a self-depreciating smile and then his posture shifted. "However the girl I was with was a few years older than me ahead of us at school and she didn't seem to mind. She showed me the ropes so to speak and we were on again off again friends with benefits till she graduated."

"Did you like her?" Hermione found herself asking.

"I liked her well enough," said Draco. "She was on the Quidditch team with me, I guess you could say we were friends...but I'm beginning to re-examine just what being a friend means. I gave her something she wanted and she gave me something I wanted" said Draco with a shrug.

"Oh," Hermione started running through her head all of the girls who had played on the Slytherin team who were older than them.

"Stop it," said Draco clearly seeing where her train of thought had gone. "Don't go trying to figure it out," he pressed his index finger to the little line that had formed between her two eyebrows. "That's the past. You are my present and my future."

"Alright," said Hermione trying to dismiss the thoughts.

"I shouldn't have told you," said Draco looking away.

"I'm glad you did," said Hermione more seriously. "I want to know about you Draco."

"I'm not good at letting people in," he admitted taking a drink of the juice he had brought up.

"Could have fooled me," said Hermione.

"Yeah, well you're the exception," said Draco and he wiped his hands.

Hermione got the sudden impression that he was nervous.

It was a little odd seeing Draco nervous. It wasn't something that he let show very often.

"Draco…I'm not going to love you any less just because I find out something new about your past." She could tell by his expression that she had hit the nail on the head for what his worries were.

He looked away from her.

"I don't have a great past Hermione, what you saw in my head…" she watched as he swallowed convulsively. "Let's just say that wasn't an isolated incident with my father… and it wasn't the worst."

"Draco," she reached for him.

"I don't want you pity," he said waving away her hand and standing. "I was horrible to you at school and to others. Do you think that you were the only one I called names and picked on?" he asked. "There were others."

"I don't care," Hermione protested, wrapping the sheet tightly around her she stood to face him.

"Well they do…and…maybe you should," he said and she could sense the dark clouds rolling through him.

"Draco," she grabbed hold of his arm. "Look at me," she ordered. He listened though she could tell by the twitch in his jaw that he did not want to. "Whatever you have done you have more than atoned for your actions with me…and once this is over," she stroked the hair off of his forehead and looked into his eyes. "You can make it up to the others you have hurt."

He looked down at her and she watched as the storm in his eyes subsided and gave way to a gentleness she only saw when he was looking at her.

"How did I ever manage to get you to fall in love with someone like me?" he asked moving the hair away from her face the same way she had moved his only second before.

"By being intelligent, and cunning…" she said and then kissed his hand. "And also being sweet and caring and letting me see you for the incredible man you are."

"The man you made me," said Draco and he pulled her close. "I would be the same stubborn, spoiled, prejudiced, git if you hadn't fallen into my life."

Draco's words hovered in the air and Hermione mulled them over.

Was it worth it? Everything she had gone through in order to have Draco here like this?

 _Yes,_ her mind answered.

 _He is worth it._

She could only imagine what her life would be like if she had simply escaped with her friends. Would they have the two Horcruxes? Would Voldemort have destroyed them all already or would have they come out on top somehow?

 _It doesn't matter,_ she told herself. _What matters is that you are both here and that you have this incredible man as yours._

 _You have a love that stood through death…that kind of love doesn't come around every day._

 _I would do it all again to have him,_ she found herself thinking and she found herself needing to kiss him. Needing to touch him. Her desire for him then came from a far deeper part of her than instinct or lust.

Everything that she was called out from inside her for the man standing within the circle of her embrace.

* * *

 **There you go. Narcissa has taken a big step forward accepting her son's choice. Draco has taken a big step forward deciding to accept Hermione's love and Hermione has taken a big step forward in vocalizing her love for Draco. And Draco and Hermione have taken a giant step forward in getting truly physical and connecting in that very special way with one another. I hope you enjoyed those scenes and this chapter as a whole, if you did please let me know-your reviews are so very much appreciated. Cheers**


	49. Chapter 47: The First Time

*****UPDATE 2020***  
I have been going through and editing (now up to chapter 26) and have done my best to fix typos, flesh out grammar etc. I have also added extra scenes and there are new chapters adding up to an additional 15,000 words added since I first began this story. I still have a long way to go so you may see this story come up as updated as I continue to add and edit. If you are looking for a continuation of this story I have started a sequel called "After Being Left Behind" so please feel free to go and check it out.  
**

 **If you like my writing please consider taking a trip over to wattpad to read my original story about a young woman who runs away across the sea from a life in a gilded cage and falls in love with a slave who has secrets of his own. Just search " Marissawalkerwriter" to find me. The story is called "Across the midnight sea"**

 **A Big thank you to:** addictedtoloveandfiction ,Aid4, Phsco13, mb1995 , Jedi SteelWolf, tomfeltonswifey,TripleLLL , youngar994 blackdeath49, Jen7, PhoenixDragon111, dancerdollar, mmiller0000 , Qween87, Ayr, mega700201, apls79, Rclaw00, LovEToReadit , jacpin2002, WeAllFallDown2003, RotcehM , IanAlphaAxel, ALIASTESIN, GMGaby, CatPeach **and the guests** "Daniel", "Who", "Sila", "D" **and** "Guest" **For taking the time to review. I appreciate you.**

 **Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me till now. I hope you enjoy this final chapter.**

 **Warning: Smut ahead...and love and cuddles.**

* * *

Chapter 47: The First Time

Draco saw a change in the look in Hermione's eyes before she shifted towards him.

"I want you," she said

"I want you too," he answered back again. He knew it was something he could say forever. He couldn't imagine ever not wanting her.

"I want to touch you," said Hermione.

Draco felt her words burn through him as if she were already touching his skin. He felt his blood heat and his already hard cock strain against his clothing.

Touching Hermione was heaven, he loved the way she responded. He loved that she was letting him touch her-especially since he knew this was all new for her, but her offer the genuine desire he heard in her voice and saw in her eyes as she told him that she wanted to touch him was...beyond words.

Draco was used to women wanting him.

He was used to women wanting him for his looks, for his attitude, for his family name and some just because he had been seeker on his Quidditch team.

Hermione wanting him...was something so much more. She wanted him, knowing who he was. Despite who he had been and because of who he was now. His body was responding to her words like an aphrodisiac. His skin hummed with the desire to feel her fingertips.

"You can," said Draco. He was hers, she didn't need to ask him to be able to touch, and yet he knew she needed him to give his permission. He could see her waiting for it.

"Do you want me to?"

 _What the hell kind of a question was that?_

Draco balked at the question.

 _Of course I want her to touch me._

Draco saw uncertainty cross her face suddenly and he hit himself mentally for clearly letting his surprise show on his face.

"I mean I might not do it right..." she looked away-the confidence and desire that had been holding the reins took a backseat to that virginal nervousness.

 _Dammit Malfoy_ , he scolded himself and he took a breath.

"Hermione," Draco took her hand and put it on his chest. He searched for the right words and then simply went with the truth, which was easier since the vow he had made meant the truth was his only option. "I know it's cliché as fuck, but I swear there is no way you can do it wrong. Even you saying you want to has me turned on beyond belief."

"Really?" she looked up at him blinking. Draco felt a wash of relief that she had taken his comment well. At the same time, it was clear to him that she wanted to believe him and yet despite everything was struggling to. He followed his instincts praying that they would help convince her and not hinder the situation.

He took her hand and moved it slowly down his body giving her plenty of time to pull back if she wanted to. He knew the movement was somewhat crude and yet Draco had the distinct feeling that it was what she needed to be convinced.

He placed her hand lightly against his pajama-pants over his straining cock.

Showing her the physical evidence of the effect her words...her presence had on him.

"Oh..." he watched her pupils dilate in an aroused response and he felt his dick jerk in response.

Hermione blinked.

"It moved," she said with a little surprise.

Draco bit back a smile.

 _No one ever really talks about that,_ he thought to himself.

"It does that," said Draco out loud.

"Oh," Hermione squeezed him through his pants gently and Draco's dick twitched gain swelling as the blood rushed to respond to her touch.

Draco closed his eyes.

He wanted to rock into her hands.

He wanted to take over turn her over and just plunge strait into that tight hot center that was waiting for him.

Thrust deep into her over and over until he was utterly spent.

 _Fuck, Draco get a hold of yourself._

Draco opened his eyes and his gaze met Hermione's. Her cheeks were flushed and her lips parted.

He kissed her.

With that look on her face he couldn't help but kiss her.

She tasted like sunshine and the strawberry jam from the dinner they had just finished.

He wanted to take control.

He wanted to just touch and kiss her and hear that sound she made when she came...

 _She said she wants to touch you_ , Draco reminded himself, _let her._

Draco purposefully slowed down taking in a deep breath.

 _You can do this, just relax,_ he ordered himself.

Truth be told he was nervous.

He knew he shouldn't technically be nervous. He knew he looked okay or rather he knew how women looked at him, and he knew his way around a woman's body, but this was different.

 _Its because she's different._

 _What if I fuck this up?_ the thought came back to him, he tried to shoo it away, and failed.

So instead of letting himself get any more nervous he lay back on the bed pulling Hermione down on top of him and focused on the woman above him.

His eyes darted downwards taking in her body finally.

He had known she was nervous before and so had kept his eyes from raking over her.

He had never seen something more beautiful in his whole life.

* * *

Hermione felt Draco's eyes run over her body and she felt the immediate urge to cover herself. Her hands went to her breasts and to cover her center.

"Please don't," he said his voice rough with emotion.

He reached out and took hold of her hands gently and moved them outwards.

Hermione felt like her whole body must be pink from blushing. Draco held her eyes as he held her hands. Slowly he pulled her forward so that she was laying naked on top of him with only his pajamas in between them. She could feel that hardness behind her straining against her backside. It made her want to squirm. He was so close and so hot. As she shifted his length lined up with her core and they both froze for a moment.

Draco inhaled and she could see the restraint on his face.

"Draco..."she breathed his name and then she kissed the skin just below his collar bone.

She felt him shudder and a small flicker of female satisfaction fluttered inside her.

He was so handsome and had experience and yet here he was shivering at her touch and hard against her.

Hermione gently extracted her hands from his and placed them on his shoulders pushing herself up slightly. His hands went to her sides holding her waist gently. She shifted up for a moment and kissed his lips with a sweet and chaste kiss completely at odds with their position.

 _What do I do?_ she found herself thinking.

She had told him she wanted to touch him, and she did.

But she didn't know how...she didn't know what was right.

Then she shifted remembering what he had done to her that had felt so good.

 _He gave you the answer_ , she told herself, _just follow his example._

She let her lips trail down his neck, kissing his skin softly. When she reached the halfway point between his neck and shoulder she hesitated and then she locked her mouth over his skin and sucked.

Draco groaned and she felt his fingers press into her sides and his hips jerk upwards.

She pulled back and kissed the place bellow it then she began kissing down his torso until she neared his nipple. It was flat and darker than the rest of his skin. She liked the colour and the look of it. She brushed her fingers across it and watched as the flesh tightened pulling up into a peak.

Her core clenched watching it, watching him.

"Are you sensitive here too?" she asked and her voice had a throaty quality to it that she had never heard from herself before.

She saw Draco swallow.

"Yeah," he admitted. "Not all guys are...not all guys like it...but...I...yeah."

He sounded sweet, hesitant...almost nervous to admit it to her.

It was endearing and calming at the same time.

If perfect, experienced Draco got to be slightly flustered then it was okay if she was too.

"Good," said Hermione and she latched on to his nipple giving him the same treatment he had given her. She flicked her tongue across him.

At first his reactions were subtle. She could feel the flexing of his stomach muscles beneath her. Then he started to shift and his hands dropped from her sides and down the bed sheets and she watched as his fingers fisted in the sheets.

She felt the pulse between her legs start up in time with her heart from his response.

She loved seeing him like this, open to her, and straining.

She loved seeing his perfect control and at the same time she wanted to break it.

 _He's been trying to be perfectly in control for so long._

She wanted to make him loose it, she wanted to make him tremble in the same way he had made her.

Hermione shifted down his body and she felt Draco still.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"I want you to finish," she said.

Saying the words out loud sent a little tremor through her because she meant it.

She wanted Draco to cum.

She wanted to be the one to make Draco cum.

She wanted to be the reason why he finally lost control in the best of ways.

"You don't have to," he said stilling her hand at the waist band of his pajamas.

Hermione looked up into Draco's eyes and saw him carrying all the weight of the world in them. He was so focused on making sure everything was okay for her that he hadn't asked or encouraged her to return the favor.

 _Well I am not going to sit back and just let him rock my world without returning the favor,_ she thought to herself.

And then she blinked up at Draco.

"I want to," she said as if it were obvious, and kissed the smooth flesh just inside his hip bone.

"Fuck," Draco's head went back.

"Sensitive there too?" she asked.

He hissed a breath through his teeth.

She kissed him there again.

"You're going to kill me Granger," he managed looking back down at her.

"I'll take that at as yes," she said smiling and she licked that spot enjoying the soft flavor of his skin. He tasted good.

 _I wonder if he tastes good...there..._ she found herself thinking and a renewed flush of arousal hit her. She opened her mouth over the flesh just by his hip and sucked it like she had sucked the place on his neck and Draco's hips came up off of the bed. She held on to him, her hands bracing on his hips. His hips dropped back to the bed and she let go.

She reached for the band of his pajamas and this time he didn't stop her. He lifted his hips when she pulled on the fabric and helped to side them out of the way.

Hermione's eyes widened.

 _That is never going to fit,_ was the first thought that she had.

The second was that the rumors around the school had been true.

Hermione hadn't seen many men naked in her life-even on television or on the internet so she didn't have much of a reference for comparison...but she knew that Draco had been modest early when he had said _'I'm not exactly small.'_

He was NOT small...THIS was NOT small.

 _Fuck,_ she thought the exploitative inside her head as she took a moment to panic internally.

He was... if she reached out to touch him she was sure the tips of her fingers would not touch her thumb wrapped around his base.

He was more than the length of her hand from wrist to fingertips.

A small flicker of fear wormed its way into her.

 _I don't know how I'm going to handle him._

"Hermione?" She heard the concern in Draco's voice and looked up at him and realized he would have been watching her this whole time and seen her face.

 _I don't want him to worry_ , she thought to herself.

 _I don't know what to do.._.she found herself thinking.

 _Do what you were going to do before you discovered he was hung like a goddamned horse,_ she ordered herself.

She reached out and wrapped her delicate hand around him.

Draco groaned.

The skin was softer than she had imagined, and harder.

She stroked her hand loosely up and down and watched for his reactions. When her hand came up towards the tip she saw him flex and so she started paying more attention there. When his fingers went back to the bed sheets and fisted she knew she was doing something right.

She saw a glisten at the tip and leaned her head forward to taste.

The moan that echoed from Draco curled Hermione's toes. Until now the sounds that he had been making had been subdued. Little moans, little groans. This one was a raw sound and she loved it. Felt in on a primal level. Opening her mouth she took him inside and sucked gently. She felt his hips jerk and pulled back so as not to gag on him.

"Sorry, Merlin, I wasn't expecting..." he started to apologize and she took him into her mouth again and Draco lost words. She worked at him, her movements unpracticed and rough. As she worked she began to feel what he liked, and she used it to give him what he wanted as best as she could.

"Hermione you gotta stop or I'm going to cum," said Draco putting a hand in her hair.

She could feel him thickening inside her, swelling.

She knew he was close.

He didn't say _"No_ " and he didn't say _"Stop"_ on its own: he had said _"Stop or I'm going to cum"_ and she wanted him to cum for her.

She wanted to taste him.

"Hermione I'm gunna cum, please" Draco's voice was pleading and she felt his fingers flex in her hair. He wasn't pulling her back and away, so she didn't stop.

She wanted all of it; all of him.

She felt a sudden jerk and then there was a pulse beneath her fingers as he came into her mouth. She swallowed what she could, nearly choking on it.

It was hot and silky and like nothing else she had known.

When he was finished she pulled up and wiped her mouth.

He tasted...good, it wasn't what she expected. A strange combination of salty and sweet and yet she wanted to do it again, to taste him again if only to experience that beautiful thrill of making him lose control.

"Come here," he ordered and she came forward pulling her in for a kiss.

"But..." she protested, thinking what she had just finished doing.

"I don't care," he said and took her mouth. She felt the force of his kiss down to her soul.

* * *

Draco felt shaky inside and out.

He had had his fair share of blowjobs.

Some from people who really knew what they were doing.

This was different.

She was different, and it had fucking rocked his world.

She had been sweet and tentative and yet that inquisitive mind had analyzed each of his little reactions and responses and she had used those indicators like a master.

 _She's going to be fucking awesome in bed hen she learns the ropes,_ a part of him thought.

 _She already is,_ the other part countered.

 _She's everything I want._

Her mouth had been so hot and so sweet and there was something incredibly erotic about looking down and seeing the one woman he wanted bent over him doing everything she could to bring him pleasure.

It was the looking down at her that had done it-that had pushed him over the edge.

When she had swallowed he had nearly come undone again.

 _She's so fucking incredible._

She looked up at him expectantly and Draco flipped their positions and began kissing his way down her body, eager to taste her and return the favor but Hermione stiffened and grabbed hold of him stopping his progress.

"What?" he asked looking up at her.

 _Why is she stopping me?_

"I was searching for you for a while and walking around and..."

Draco got the hint. He didn't care and she had literally nothing to worry about. She smelled amazing and he was more than ready to go down on her, but he wasn't about to do it while she was feeling self-conscious.

He wanted her to enjoy it.

"Alright," he said and lifted her out of bed. He wasn't about to let that get in the way. He wanted her and he wanted to taste her. So badly. He wanted to lick and kiss and suck at her until she cried out in sweet, sweet ecstacy, and he wanted to taste the honey of that release on his tongue.

She let out a small yelp as he began to carry her towards the bathroom.

"What are you doing. Where are we going?" she asked.

"We are going to have a very sexy shower," said Draco with a wry smile. "We are going to spend plenty of time washing each other off.." he let the words linger. "And then I am going to put my mouth on you and tease you until you cum so hard you see stars."

* * *

Draco set her down on the stool by the vanity and turned on the shower testing it for water.

 _See stars?_

Wasn't that something that only happened in romance novels?

Hermione watched Draco move gracefully around the small bathroom. She was caught between the modesty of wanting to avert her eyes and the chance to see him like this.

How many times had she seen him shirtless while at the manor and thought about how beautiful that toned body looked and how it felt while he was on top of her.

Her memories went to the night when she had been drunk and a flush of shame had her grabbing a towel and covering herself. Draco turned back to her and he smiled wryly and she found herself blushing.

"I think its kinda cute how you cover up," he said grabbed the nearest towel and wrapped it around his hips.

Hermione wanted to protest. She had been enjoying the view and then she realized that it was a bit of a double standard. Her being able to see him without him being able to see her.

Draco turned on the shower and then came and knelt down beside her on the bathmat and looked up at her. She looked down at his lean contoured torso and then her eyes came back to his face where she found him looking up at her intently waiting.

"You like what you see?" he asked, quirking a brow slightly cocky.

"I'd have to be blind not to," she said rolling her eyes.

Draco took hold of her hand and stroked a thumb across her knuckles.

"I'm glad," said Draco, his voice turning from playful to serious. "You know…I've had a lot of people who look at me hungry. Sometimes it's a turn on…" he said and kissed a spot on the inside of her knee. "And sometimes it makes me feel slimy…" he kissed the other. "But when you look at me like that…" he looked up at her. "It makes me feel…" He straightened so that he was eye level with her sitting and him on his knees. "More." He kissed her. "I like seeing you hungry for me," he said between kisses. "It lets me know I'm not alone."

"You're not alone Draco," she said and wrapped her arms around his neck as he kissed her.

Draco lifted her up suddenly and she wrapped her legs instinctively around him only this time there was no covering between them. She felt the heated flesh of his sides against the inside of her thighs and the hard contour of his stomach against her open core. She felt like she should pull back, like she should be ashamed and yet all she wanted to do was rub herself shamelessly against those washboard abs.

Draco pulled away her towel, tossing it unceremoniously assize before removing his own towel and carrying her into the shower.

He pressed her up against the wall as the water sprayed down on them.

She looked at him them and saw the vulnerability in his eyes even as he held her captive between himself and the wall.

"I love you, you know that," he said as if he hadn't said it before several times today.

She didn't know why he seemed to need to say it again. Maybe it was the fact that he had believed her to be dead for so long. Maybe it was the fact that he hadn't been able to say it to her when they were in the manor except towards the end when he thought he was dying.

The reason didn't matter, she only cared that he seemed to need her reassurance that she knew.

And Hermione did know, down to her very bones.

There was nothing the man in front of her wouldn't do for her because of his love. He had given up everything, risked everything for her and when he had thought she was dead and gone he didn't revert back to who he was before. He had let his love of her be his sustaining power driving him down a path where he was trying to be good-trying to be the hero she had called him.

"I know," she said, knowing that was what he needed to hear most in that moment. Then because she wanted to she kissed him and added. "I love you too."

Draco closed his eyes and when he opened them he let her slowly slide down the wall. Hermione stood flat footed while Draco picked up the soap. She wanted to run away and to hide from his view, but they were in a shower and there was nowhere to really go. She did turn towards the wall though, feeling vulnerable.

She loved Draco, that didn't change the fact that she still wasn't used to being naked with a man. Let alone naked in a shower. She felt Draco's hands touch her hip.

"You okay?" he asked kissing her shoulder.

"Yeah," she nodded and looked back at him, her arms covered in an x across her chest.

Draco reached outside the shower door and grabbed a fresh loofah from the basket nearby which was filled to the brim with supplies. He squirted some bodywash onto it and lathered it gently all the while looking at her. He reached up and placed it against her back and began gently washing.

Hermione felt the tension slowly drain as he rubbed in soft circles across her skin. Then he went lower and she felt it sweep over her as and resisted the urge to twist away. She felt him drop down and then he was washing her legs gently. Hermione let out a sigh. It felt oddly nice to be cared for this way.

"Turn around?" he asked gently.

Hermione only hesitated for a moment before turning so that she was looking down at him. He looked up straight into her eyes.

"You're so beautiful," he said softly and began running the loofah up her body. He bypassed her mound and washed her stomach. When he came up to her already sensitive breasts he lightened the pressure so as not to irritate her skin. Then he held her gaze as he dropped his hand between them and stroked the soapy material between her legs.

Hermione reached out and held onto his shoulders. He was careful and gentle and his touch made her feel both vulnerable and cherished at the same time. He replaced the puff with his hand and stroked her cupping her mound gently.

She heard him inhale and opened her eyes blinking up at him.

"Okay," said Draco and then he offered her the loofah.

Hermione took it and rinsed it off before applying more body wash. She started up a lather and Draco turned around. She ran her fingers and the soapy puff over his shoulders. She noted new scars; ones she hadn't seen before decorating his skin. There were only a handful of them and yet it changed the way he looked.

No longer did Draco look like a pretty little polished boy. He now looked like a hard-living man.

She washed him the same way that he had washed her, in the same order. Only when she came to his dick he took the Loofah away and she used her hands to stroke and wash him. Draco kissed her shoulders and neck as she worked and she watched as he hardened for her to the point where his flesh was straining.

Draco stepped back and rinsed off and then he shifted her so that she was leaning back against the wall.

"Brace your hands against either wall, he ordered her gently and Hermione obeyed.

Draco dropped to his knees and Hermione's stomach dropped to her toes.

His hands came up to her thighs and he gently encouraged them apart. He stroked her with one finger watching her, holding her gaze until she had to look away. She turned her cheek into the wall and let the cool of the tile sooth her flushed skin.

She felt a flicker of breath and she looked down at him again. He was kneeling there waiting for her eyes to connect with his. He looked up at her from his knees and Hermione felt her heart squeeze. His eyes were so beautiful and so completely focused looking up at her. He dipped his head forward and kissed the place inside her hip mirroring where she had kissed him. Hermione shivered.

His hands slipped upwards to her center and he parted her then leaned forward and placed his mouth on her.

The heat was overwhelming.

If she had thought she liked the feel of his fingers…. This was more.

He sucked at her and she bowed.

"That's good," said Draco. "Tilt your hips forward."

Hermione obeyed and he slipped a finger inside her as he began to lick and flick his tongue across her clit.

"Draco!" she called out his name. Her body was almost there and he slowed. Then he began to stretch her with his fingers. She felt them curl inside her and brush a spot that made her knees buckle and give for a moment.

Draco clearly noticed and stroked there several times until Hermione was squirming against the wall. Then he slowed down again and inserted a third finger for the first time, pushing it only to the first knuckle.

She wanted to call out. She wanted to tell him it was too much, but he was being so gentle. Each time she felt as if it were going to break or tear her he would ease off gently. After a few minutes he switched back to just the two fingers and put his mouth back on her flicking his tongue across her clit.

One of Hermione's hands came down from the wall for a moment to touch his hair as her body began to tighten, then she reached back against the wall as he knees threatened to buckle again with a particularly artful twist of his fingers within her.

She could feel it building, that beautiful feeling inside like she was racing towards some kind of an ending.

"Please," she found herself calling out to him.

Draco listened and she found his mouth on her sucking at her clit while he flicked his tongue back and forth and thrust his fingers inside her hitting that spot inside each time.

Hermione let out a cry as all the tension that had been building released in a blast that had her toes curling and her legs locking.

She saw black stars on the edge of her vision as the world tilted.

 _He was right_ , she thought as her world shifted and she felt like floating. _He did make me see stars._

* * *

Hermione felt Draco catch her before he legs turned completely to jelly.

He held on to her as he turned off the water and wrapped a towel around her body, then he swept her up into his arms bridal-style and carried her back to Bed.

She loved when he carried her this way.

Hermione felt like she wanted to sing and sleeping at the same time.

A part of her mind and body was completely alert and awake to what was going on and the other part was ready to just cuddle up in a ball and sleep next to Draco knowing she was safe and the nightmare was over.

They were here…safe…hidden…together.

She felt a sudden yearning for the oasis.

Draco lay her down on the bed and tucked a towel behind her wet hair.

Hermione thought about drying it off, but then she felt Draco's hands on her once more testing the heat between her legs before shifting his body so that he was positioned over her.

"You're sure?" he asked looking at her.

Any part of her that had thought about sleep snapped awake and to attention.

All of her fears came racing back.

Was she sure?

 _Yes_ , her mind answered.

She was sure she loved him.

She was sure she wanted him.

She was sure she wanted to do this.

She was not sure what she was supposed to do or how she was going to handle Draco.

"You've gone white again," said Draco and he started to back off.

"No!" she protested and grabbed a hold of him yanking him close and kissing him. "I'm sure, I'm sure," she said squeezing her arms around his neck.

"Okay, okay," said Draco. "Ease off," he said gently.

Hermione released her arms realizing just how tightly she had been gripping him. Draco didn't seem mad though and after rubbing his neck for a quick second he came back and started kissing her, not giving her time to be embarrassed about holding him so tightly.

Then she felt one of his hands go down to her core and part her.

She tensed.

"Relax," crooned Draco.

"I don't know if I can," she answered, hearing her own voice tremble.

"It's okay," he said kissing her. "I've got you."

"Draco, please just do it," she grabbed hold of his face in her hands. "I want you. I want all of you and I want you inside of me."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"I know," she answered and kissed him. "But I need you in me. Please, you've done enough, just be in me."

She felt Draco shift.

Felt as he aligned himself with her entrance.

The heat was scorching.

"Wait," Draco said and paused reaching over to the nightstand. He picked up his wand and cast a quick contraceptive spell.

Hermione felt herself blush.

She hadn't remembered that part, she had been too busy thinking about her own nerves and the stars he had made her see before and if it was going to hurt as much as some girls said.

Setting aside the wand Draco returned to her and kissed her.

Then he pushed forward so that the tip was inside her. Hermione felt stretched by that small portion of him alone and was suddenly so very thankful he had taken so much time stretching her with his fingers.

Hermione looked up to see an intense look of concentration on Draco's face, as if he were holding back a tidal wave.

"It's okay," she said. "Just do it."

Draco looked down at her.

"I love you," he said and then he thrust forward.

* * *

Draco left Hermione's whole body stiffen as he thrust forward and into her breaking her hymen.

Her finger tips dug into his shoulders hard enough he was sure a few of them had drawn blood.

Draco closed his eyes and counted in his head.

He held on for dear life.

She was so hot and so tight around him he wanted to just finish right then and there and sink into her beautiful body straight to the hilt.

But he didn't want to hurt her more. She wasn't ready to take all of him.

He had enjoyed the blowjob she had given him early but was especially thankful for it now because that earlier release was the only thing keeping him from coming just from the sensation of being inside her.

Draco opened his eyes and saw that Hermione's eyes were glistening without brimming over.

"Are..." he managed. "you okay?"

She nodded, biting her bottom lip.

"Its not that bad," she answered and he heard the truth in her tone. "It only hurt for a second," she sounded almost surprised.

"Good," he said feeling a wash of relief at her words.

He really hadn't wanted to hurt her.

"Draco..." she said his name.

"Yes," he answered feeling the strain, the desire to move warring with his desire to give her time to adjust.

"Are you going to move?"

His body pulsed at her words.

He wanted to move, but if he moved now he was going to finish.

"In a minute," he answered and kissed her. "I need a second," he answered honestly. "And I want to give your body some time to relax and accept mine."

"I want you to move," she said closing her eyes and letting her head lean back against the pillow. "I feel like I'm going to die if you don't."

Her words went straight to Draco's dick and he groaned leaning down to kiss by her collar bone.

"You have no idea how fucking sexy you are," he half complained half complimented against her skin.

Hermione stroked her hands gently down his back and Draco shivered and then pulled out of her a little. He lifted his head and saw a flicker of discomfort in her face. Then he sank back in slowly and he watched her eyes widen as he pushed a little deeper this time.

"Oh," she said and he felt the muscles inside her flutter against him.

Draco's eyes wanted to roll into the back of his head from the pleasure of it.

 _Fuck,_ he groaned inwardly

 _Get a hold of yourself Draco, slow and steady. You can do this._

He pulled out again. This time her hands went to his shoulders bracing against as he thrust forward.

She let out a small sound in the back of her throat and he worried for a second until he saw the hint of a smile at the corner of her lips.

He was beyond thankful to see that smile.

 _Focus on what will make her feel better._

"Wrap your legs around me Hermione," he ordered gently and Hermione obeyed wincing slightly at the movement.

He withdrew and pushed forward until he was buried deep inside her as far as her virginal channel would allow.

"It feels good," Hermione said into his shoulder.

"Yeah," Draco answered, his mind to fried to give her a longer answer.

"I didn't know if it would."

Draco withdrew and thrust forward, this time a little harder, unable to keep the flex from his hips.

Hermione let out a gasp and her nails dug in again. Her thighs flex against him and her cunt tightened around his dick so that his eyes crossed for a second with the pleasure of it.

"Fuck, Hermione," he said her name and paused. If he moved now he would cum, he was sure of it. That tight hot heat gripping him so fiercely.

Hermione shifted.

"Don't move," he almost barked.

"Sorry."

"You didn't do anything wrong," Draco managed squeezing his eyes shut. "I'm just really close."

"Oh," he looked up to see her smiling.

"Why are you smiling?"

"Because I'm glad you can want me enough to override your prowess."

"Merlin Granger," Draco dropped his head to her shoulder feeling some of his control return.

"It makes me happy to know that I can turn you on that much Draco," he heard the admission in her voice as if she felt guilty about saying it out loud. "I want you to cum. I don't care if I do again. You've given me more than enough. I want to feel you lose yourself inside of me. Please," she kissed his neck and then kissed the shell of his ear trailing her tongue across the smooth outside. "Please," she asked again and shifted her hips squeezing him.

"Fuck," he groaned and began moving.

Her permission was all he had really needed.

He started fucking her for real. Letting instinct and lust drive his hips into her.

He closed his eyes and felt.

He was going to loose it any second.

And then he felt her walls flutter around him.

 _She's close._

Fresh determination raced through him. If she was close he could hold out for her.

He could hold out long enough to watch her cum with him.

Blood rushed in Draco's ears and he felt his body tightening.

Draco reached down between them changing the angle and he rubbed at her clit as he moved.

"Draco!" she said his name and curled into him, her body hampering his movements. He didn't care. He wanted that climax he wanted her to ride it with him.

"Cum for me Hermione," he ordered. "Let go."

Her head flew backwards against the pillow and her back arched off of the bed.

She screamed, clawing at his arms as the climax ripped through her.

Her body clenched and spasmed around him milking him and Draco moved his hand from her core and grabbed hold of her hips ramming into her. He finally let go and gave into the tidal wave of pleasure he had been holding back.

He thrust into her as she clung to him and when she collapsed and fell back on the bed he fell down with her.

* * *

Hermione was going to need a minute.

No she was going to need an hour.

Possibly days.

 _What the hell was that?_

She kept her eyes closed trying to regain some semblance on control over her breathing

Draco lay on top of her, half of his weight still on her while the other half was being somewhat supported by one arm. She kind of liked the weight of him above her. It was a little uncomfortable while being entirely comforting.

"That was incredible," she heard him muffle into the pillow next to her head.

"That's my line," said Hermione. "I didn't do much."

"You did more than enough," said Draco and he lifted himself up. She felt his limbs tremble with the motion as he looked down at her. "You are the most incredible woman I have ever met and will ever know."

"Draco..." she said his name blushing.

Draco gave a half-smile and kissed her, then he gently withdrew from her body.

Hermione winced.

"You okay?" he asked immediately concerned.

"I'm fine," she answered. "A little sore, but I'm good Draco." And then because she felt like he needed to hear it she added. "You did a good job making sure I was ready for you."

"I tried."

"I know," she kissed him.

Draco reached for his wand and cleaned them both up with a quick spell, then he shifted up on the bed.

Hermione came over and curled into his side letting her head rest against his chest.

"So what now?" she asked.

"I'm thinking a few hours of sleep and recovery for you before we try that again."

Hermione slapped his shoulder gently.

"I meant for life, not in bed," she said shaking her head and shifting to look at him.

"I'd happily spend my life in bed with you," said Draco kissing her and pinning her hand gently on the matress before she could smack him again. His face and tone grew serious. "Now we go and try and save the world, and those friends of yours, so I can earn the chance of a happily ever after."

"A happily ever after?" she asked, his words making her feel both hot and cold at the same time.

"I'm going to love you forever Hermione," said Draco. "It's up to you what you want to do with your life." He shifted getting more comfortable. She could tell he was getting times and yet as he pulled her against his naked body, Hermione felt her skin flush.

"You promise?" she asked a moment later from her place tucked beneath his chin.

"Hmmm?" he asked looking down clearly not getting her question.

"Do you promise to love me forever?" she asked making her question clear. She had promised herself no more miscommunications between them and she wasn't about to let one happen now, in bed after something as perfect and incredible as what they had just shared.

"And ever," he answered shifting back a little so that he could kiss her properly. "I'll give you anything and everything I can Hermione. Whatever the life you want I'll support and stand by you. All I ask is that you let me love you."

"And love you back?" she said clarifying.

"That would be my preference," he answered kissing the top of her head and settling back down.

"Draco?"

"Yes?" he answered yawning.

"Be my forever," she said seriously. "Promise me that no matter what you'll be mine."

There was a pause and Draco pulled back from her again this time so that he could look her in the eye.

"I promise," he said looking at her seriously. "Whatever comes."

"No matter what they say? no matter what we have to go up against?" she asked needing to hear him say it.

"No matter what" said Draco. "We'll face it together."

"Together," agreed Hermione.

Draco smiled and closed his eyes knowing in his heart that everything would be okay, so long as they were:

Together.

* * *

 **THE END**

 **Thank you for Joining me on this journey and staying with me till now. It is my sincerest hope that you enjoyed that story and the sweet climactic ending. Our two lovebirds are together, in love, and have gotten together.**

 **The good guys win, everything eventually gets sorted out and Draco and Hermione live happily ever after.**

* * *

 **AUTHORS NOTE: Update May 2020 If you enjoyed this story want to see how all of the plots continue to unfold I have decided to do a full sequel called "After Being Left Behind" Now in progress**

 **Thanks so much for being here. If you enjoyed this story please leave a little review to brighten my day. cheers** **  
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